Skip to content
Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
You might try our Headline Search for easier navigation here.

These links may be stale and generate errors. Can't do much about it. Tastes like chicken.
Sun October 28, 2018
(MSN)
 
 
 
Conservative Christians raise $25,000 to help families of the Jewish Synagogue massacre. Wait a second.... did I say Conservative Christians? I meant Muslims (Update: over $100k now)
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
French "Spider-Man" banned from climbing any buildings in the UK, says he would take the elevator but they make him a little claustrophobic
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Southgate News-Herald)
 
 
 
380 current suspensions, 45 active warrants and a cracked windshield. Check that, make it 340 suspensions
source: thenewsherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Stray onto private land while deer hunting? Hell yes, that's a shootin'
source: atlantic.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Military Times)
 
 
 
The day America broke Iceland's beer industry
source: militarytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wordpress)
 
 
 
Photoshop these water chestnuts
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
South Park Susan. Hint: Involves a white lady
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
Design the cover page of your autobiography/memoir
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
Well, aside from the fact that we're Farkers, here are the (other) reasons why we are all having a lot less sex than we used to
source: lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Athens Banner Herald)
 
 
 
Caviar dreams on a university salary?
source: onlineathens.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Ever wonder how the best drivers in Europe view Americans' (in)ability to properly drive? Well, wonder no more, mein freund. Also, the LEFT LANE IS FOR PASSING ONLY, GOTT VERDAMMT
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Sasquatch-themed coffee shop
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: School field trips
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
If you already knew Australia was dangerous place, learning about the tarantulas that hunt underwater there might not make much difference. Otherwise, read on
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
List of five towns and a city that haven't had hygiene inspections in a year. Bon appetit
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
In the UK? Your clocks should go back an hour to British Bleak Time. (Subby forgot last night, a first.)
source: gov.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Trump's "Border Wall" unveiled, and it looks as intimidating and impenetrable as can be. Kidding, it looks as lame as everything else he's promised
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WIVB)
 
 
 
Dumb: Bringing marijuana from Canada to the US. Dumber: While high on gummies. Dumbest: Texting your friend about it while in custody
source: wivb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat October 27, 2018
(Metro)
 
 
 
Police swarm and detain suspected terrorist armed with a sword and gun and dressed in a bizarre fashion. In other news, Comic-Con was in town and cosplayers can get pretty serious about accuracy
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AccuWeather)
 
 
 
Subtropical storm Oscar forms in the Atlantic, may be a real grouch wherever it goes
source: accuweather.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Kids these days would rather live in a rural Indian village than pay off $20k in student debt
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 29 Philadelphia)
 
 
 
This time of year in West Deptford, NJ a lesser known companion of the Headless Horseman haunts residents
source: fox29.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
Illinois school district: wait, you mean we shouldn't have hired the teacher facing an attempted murder rap? You make it sound like that was wrong or something. Why do you hate public employees?
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this happy couple
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"I sell orgasms for a living." (Not safe for work)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Cheeky bandit in loose pants sought by police
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
I mean, it's only $750 million. Is that even worth the effort to get out of bed? I really don't get excited until it's at least a billion these days
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this monster just in time for Halloween
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Everybody thought it was an ice cream truck. (0:53)
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Sports trophies, movie extras, and of course Florida Woman. It's time once again for the Fark Weird News Quiz, October 7-13 Paraprosdokian Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post Canada)
 
 
 
Not everybody in Canada is amused with pot being legalized
source: huffingtonpost.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
CBS Pittsburgh has identified Synagogue shooting suspect as an anti-Semite who doesn't think Trump is racist enough
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSBY San Luis Obispo)
 
NewsFlash
 
Active shooter situation at Pittsburgh synagogue - gunman in custody
source: ksby.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
High school: Hey, remember how we had to cancel "Men's Week" last year because of all the sexism? Well, let's try it again but this time just tell people not to get offended
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rare.us)
 
 
 
Homeless people in San Jose make more money picking up trash than McDonalds pays their fry guys
source: rare.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
Guy mesmerizes social media by creating giant clumps of foam. Confused? You won't be after this week's episode of soap
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Photoshop this convention attendee
source: img.thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
The Holy Grail sells for $2 million. Monty Python farts in your general direction
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Argus (UK))
 
 
 
Four tiny five-week-old kittens who were found inside a garbage bag which had been dumped in the woods are recovering well. Now named Chester, Ivy, Ash and Rowan, they would like you to give them treets and then leaf them alone to enjoy Caturday
source: theargus.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Looks like "Porshce" Australia should have used the preview feature before submitting this car
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fast Company)
 
 
 
The MAGAbomber case reveals that if you post anything to anyone in the US, the authorities can ID you within 24 hours. Your Facebook page is just a bonus
source: fastcompany.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Deecaying Human Head shows up weeks after Headless Body shows up.Wow, this Lollapalooza sucks
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Man claims his 5-year-old son was threatened for dressing up as a historical figure for Halloween
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
Florida man has an iPhone it seems
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"I don't know what's scarier, that you lost nuclear warheads or that it happens so often you actually have a code name for it"
source: edition-m.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed News)
 
Boobies
 
Mom finds out her perfect little angel isn't so innocent with help of an X-ray
source: buzzfeednews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Why are allergies suddenly the scourge of modern life?
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Doctors remove live cricket from ear of man who thought nobody liked his jokes
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Madman with a gun kills 14 kindergartners. Oh wait my bad, it was a knife so they all lived
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Move over hipster water, there's a new dog on the block
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri October 26, 2018
(USA Today)
 
 
 
I didn't get a flu shot last year. I got the flu. It morphed into bacterial bronchitis and ruined about three months of my life. Should I get a flu shot this year?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WREG Memphis)
 
 
 
Parachuting pup could receive first license to skydive without human. Military K-9s laugh, say try doing it while humans are shooting at you
source: wreg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
American Airlines passenger who claimed suitcase was 'robbed' had actually grabbed the wrong bag
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Caravan migrants on Trump: "We think he'll change his way of thinking and let us through"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Body cam shows police officer, good Samaritan bend door of burning car to free women trapped inside
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Onlookers confused as to why a fuel truck scraping against a jetliner's wing didn't cause a huge explosion
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Photoshop this red eye
source: img.thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Vet: "I've seen things, you people wouldn't believe. Bras and panties in dog x-rays. I watched a dog eat an entire comforter. All these things will be lost, like King Kong down a dog's gullet"
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
'KC's stolen colon' is the name of my KC and the Sunshine Band tribute act
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Why weren't any of the mail bombs postmarked? They were too lumpy and squishy to cancel, it turns out
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NextGov)
 
 
 
US Geological Survey network security breached by Russian malware because an employee was getting his rocks off at work
source: nextgov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Good news, everyone: Study finds there's not enough fruit and vegetables on the planet for everyone to eat a healthy diet, so stuffing your face with red meat and donuts instead could be considered taking one for the team
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
 
 
 
Detective: Your video equipment that recorded drunk cops attacking a group of bikers malfunctioned, and now the data cannot be recovered. Bar owner: Good thing I already gave copies to the bikers' attorney. Detective: What's that now?
source: triblive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Normal: Getting your gf pregnant. Not normal: Getting her mom pregnant too
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Illinois capitol building evacuated when an unknown strange substance is found in washroom. Turns out to be soap
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cosplayer
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
TV Reporter blows nose to the tune of Bee Gees 'Stayin' Alive'
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
Trying to find a gift for that person who has everything? This woman gave her bellybutton to her boyfriend
source: wsrz.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Hamburger Mary's becomes home to Hepatitis A Mary
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Death has visited Windsor Castle
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
Painting created by artificial intelligence sells action for nearly half a million
source: wsrz.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
There is no way the MAGA bomber story can get any more Florida. You say he worked as a male stripper? I stand corrected
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Criminals smash truck into supermarket, come away empty-handed. It's just too bad they didn't find the priceless medieval and Tudor artifacts they accidentally unearthed in the process
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Meanwhile in Canada, a bear is stealing honey from bees. Oh bother
source: barrie.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Iowa first grade teacher shows up to a Halloween party in blackface, says she did it cause Megyn Kelly said it was ok
source: amp.miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Pricipal . Caught Sayoc bomb that has stoped Vandstandsing " MAGAbombed " Is He dead or not. CNN Says yes. St. Pete Times Looking for vanifesto -OR- "hello, I am mail dud bomb to explode and wait for answer again"
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Passenger becomes agitated and activates the emergency slide while plane is still moving. When asked for a statement, he said, "Wheeeeee"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The gunman who killed two people in a Louisville Kroger supermarket, just before heading to the store, had tried to gain access to a nearby black church holding their weekly meeting but was foiled by the locked doors
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Indian air quality plummets to 'worst possible' category, also known as 'Union Carbide'
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
Mom fighting to keep 160 pound pig as emotional support animal, calls spider as supporting witness
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Aircraft gets caught up in the Bahamas Triangle, disappears from radar
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
The rise and fall of Bubba the Love Sponge, Florida's version of Howard Stern
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Military.com)
 
 
 
Marine First Sergeant accused of stealing more than $1.5 million in razor blades. Neither razor was recovered
source: military.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Beware of NYC's "Subway Wizard," for he will give you a task before he grants you your wish
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man arrested for trying to destroy the Magna Carta with a hammer. Looks like he didn't want to run for president and chip away at it with new laws and sanctions like we do here in America
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Good guy with a gun sees bank robbery about to go down. Arrests the process. There will be a civil discussion on the merits of the Hero tag usage here today. Snacks will be provided
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Strutting through your workplace wearing nothing but a novelty "elephant thong willy warmer," hi-vis vest and boots is no way to keep your job, weird guy
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Bomb #11 (Cory Booker) found in Florida, possible bomb #12 being investigated in Manhattan
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"A trip to Graceland ruined my marriage" No matter what you're expecting, it's not that
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this craftsman and his product
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Putin warns any European country accepting nuclear weapons from US may be attacked
source: news.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
The reason you cannot buy a lottery ticket with a credit card is because lottery officials do not want you to go into debt
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live5 News Charleston)
 
 
 
Naked woman tries to bite off man's penis during threesome. Surprisingly, drugs were involved
source: live5news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTRE Lufkin)
 
 
 
♫ A horse is a horse ♫ Of course; of course ♫ And horsing around is okay, of course ♫ Unless you horse with a rifle, of course ♫ And shoot a big hole in your friend ♫
source: ktre.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The real tragedy of the pipe bomb attacks against Democratic leaders? Fox News had a perfect two weeks of "The Migrant Caravan is Coming to Rape and Kill You All" coverage planned, and now it's all ruined. RUINED
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJAC TV Johnstown)
 
 
 
You have trained your children well if the police follow your trail of vehicular destruction to your upstairs bathroom where they are holding up your hair while you vomit in the sink
source: wjactv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Proud Boy cleans up for court by losing the varmint on his chin, and claims he can't be racist because he has a black wife. Not that one, the other one
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South Jersey Courier-Post)
 
 
 
About grandpa's old newspaper that you dumped off at Goodwill. It's worth up to $16,000
source: courierpostonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
These tiny drones can open doors 40 times their weight, may one day help pre-crime division scan our retinas
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Texas drivers on Interstate 10 Thursday had a damn good reason to say out loud "Well hell...there's something you don't see every day" (w/cellphone video)
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Sculpture to be modified because: a) it contains nudity, b) it's dangerous for kids to play on, or c) at least two seagulls have impaled themselves on it
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu October 25, 2018
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Sometimes "Ciao" means "goodbye" as in goodbye, Ciao Bistro
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Herald)
 
 
 
Protip: After you rob a bank don't text your cop buddy that you just happened to recognize him responding to your robbery
source: dailyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Time Warner Center (CNN HQ) is being evacuated due to suspicious package. This is not a repeat
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tied-up guy
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Butt injection death cosmetic "surgeon" closer to being deported to the U.S. to face trial over allegations that the procedure did, in fact, do more than just damn near kill 'em
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
If you're going to be driving down the road with a stockpile of weapons and ammo, be sure to drink coffee instead of beer. (With 'yep, pretty much what I expected' mugshot goodness)
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Observer)
 
 
 
The Vatican released a Pokemon Go ripoff. Which Pokemon type is Jesus?
source: observer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
How can you need a DNA test to find out you're "half Black"? Maybe your cousin is pissed for exposing a family secret. Sick tag is for the kid bullied thanks to Ancestory.com
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *breathes in* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA He's talking about Trump and his minions right?
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
U.S Geological Survey updates its threat assessment. You may want to read this if you live near Mt. St. Helens or Mt. Rainier
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
The beer shoplifter isn't David Schwimmer, it's my son
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Good news: You can own your own amusement park just like Richie Rich. Bad news: you can own your own amusement park just like Rich's Propofol-addicted creeper friend
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cereal
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTRE Lufkin)
 
 
 
If you need to go to the hospital but you don't have transportation, so you call a social worker but dial a wrong number, make sure the number you dial accidentally is Jimmy Johns--they'll get you there freaky fast
source: ktre.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
High on drugs and 'entwined in brambles and gorse' is no way to go out, people. No word on what gorse is
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
Handcuffed woman steals cruiser right in front of cop. He'll never live this one down
source: wsrz.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
The most powerful storm to hit the U.S. in 80 years just wiped out a U.S. territory
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"My friends make fun of me, saying it is easier to throw rocks without holding a flag in the other hand, but I got used to it"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Winning the lottery is the new hip
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Thieves steal eight newborn puppies after threatening owner and children. Police on the lookout for old man who won't stop singing about his vest
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
NJ mayor receives a B of D to E. Police called to investigate
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
"He's not dead." Later: "Okay, it was an accident." Later: "Okay, so maybe it was premeditated"
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Please note: when hiring a subcontractor, always check their credentials. Otherwise, you may end up stuck dealing with a Crown Prince launching wars and incompetent murder coverups
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Newspaper blocked by courts from naming top UK businessman accused of racism, bullying and sexual harassment. UK politician uses Parliamentary privilege and names businessman. UK media reports politician naming businessman. Checkmate
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Mattis expected to sign order sending 800 troops to Mexican border
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Whatcha gonna do, America, when the Burmese python invasion runs wild over you?
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
The South may not rise again, but it has no problem time-warping back to the Confederacy in Tampa
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Former employee sentenced for stealing $400K from hospital, which works out to about three aspirin and a used IV needle
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Tall people at greater risk of cancer, study finds. Also more likely to spit on people and tell them it's raining when asked 'How's the weather up there'
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Bolton News)
 
 
 
Rat testicle earrings and a dead rabbit toaster. That's Christmas sorted
source: theboltonnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Breaking News out of Florida. Please position your fainting couches. It appears that Auto Insurance Companies are charging different rates in different ZIP CODES
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Man in panda mask doesn't eat shoots and leaves, but does rob convenience store of cigarettes and cash
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
There's one place in the U.S. that Google Earth didn't update for eight years. Yes it's pretty much where you think. In other news, sales of Reynolds Wrap up 500%
source: motherboard.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Man stabs pit bull out on a walk multiple times after it stops to give the usual 'sniff-the-butt' greeting to his chihuahua
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Google allows you to delete your search history and other "activity" so your mom won't catch on to your Albanian nun planking fetish
source: support.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this musician
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsChannel 5 Nashville)
 
 
 
"TDOT warns drivers of increased dear in roadways". Dear Lord
source: newschannel5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(1011 Now Lincoln)
 
 
 
News: Man chases, captures and detains bank fraud suspect until police arrive. Fark: Chased him down with a riding lawn mower
source: 1011now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Woman saves husband with CPR, then gives birth. Ta-daa
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTRE Lufkin)
 
 
 
Watch out, escaping perps. Here comes the JUDGE
source: ktre.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Some dickhead robs a bank. With helpful pic of said dickhead
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
You trying to pipe bomb me? I don't see anyone else around here. So, you must be trying to pipe bomb me
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
Three hundred years after his death, Blackbeard the Pirate finally goes on trial
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(EcoWatch)
 
 
 
The latest trend in prescriptions? Put down the smartphone and get out of the damned house. Big pharma opposes
source: ecowatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
An STI is diagnosed in a young Brit every four minutes. Wow, that young Brit should really use protection
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
High School football field pooper finally comes clean
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Aggie researchers find oldest North American weapons. Skeleton nearby found holding a beer can and sporting a National Spear Association hat
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Wrong is fattening up your bridesmaids before your wedding so you will look better than them, even if you are a bridezilla
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
News: Man stabs co-worker, charged with attempted murder. Fark: Has been placed under house arrest. UltraFark: In Antarctica
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Ice-T -- driving a McLaren 720S -- is arrested for blowing through George Washington Bridge toll booth without an E-ZPass
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 703: "Shoot the Photographer". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed October 24, 2018
(CNN)
 
 
 
The FBI issues a nationwide warning about more bombs being out there. Enjoy your election
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Apple: That's a nice phone-hacking tool you've got there, Officers. It would be a shame if something happened to it
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Incredibly handsome man searched for a girl on the dark web to kill, rape, and cannibalize
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Civilized)
 
 
 
"Enforcing cannabis prohibition costs Alabama taxpayers approximately $22 million per year." Article submitted from Washington State...out of a recreational pot shop
source: civilized.life   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Five Thirty-Eight)
 
 
 
FiveThirtyEight reveals stunning poll results
source: fivethirtyeight.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cool car
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
But it just fell out of the sky and landed in my yard. What do you mean I can't keep it?
source: lmtonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNS Fox 21)
 
 
 
To solve Greenville's pigeon problem, might I recommend a couple of Bolivian tree lizards, followed by a round of Chinese needle snakes. Don't worry about the snake-eating gorillas that will follow...they will simply freeze to death when winter rolls around
source: foxcarolina.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
Super Typhoon Yutu, the strongest storm on Earth this year so far, might cause President of the Northern Mariana Islands to ask for US help
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Yahoo agrees to pay 25 cents for each account that was compromised in the world's largest security breach that it tried to cover up for 2 years
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Multiple people shot inside a Kroger on the outskirts of Louisville. Suspect in custody
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda Report)
 
 
 
In Russia, corrupt officials throw cash out of car windows
source: pravdareport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Pope Francis fires a bishop. This is not a euphemism
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Union Leader)
 
 
 
NH woman knocked off motorcycle by flying turkey..."got to keep the turkey, so that was good"
source: unionleader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these dapper gentlemen
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Woman sentenced in kidnapping/murder case after fearing Elvis was going to steal her husband. From the looks of the pics, she had reason to worry
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
Video
 
So you need a quick and easy Halloween costume, but you're an amputee. Wat do? Wat do?
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
We interrupt this bomb coverage to bring you a heartwarming tale of two girls who worship Satan and planned a school attack where they leave body parts at the building's entrance
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Peru's Minister of Culture announces centuries-old set of sculptures and complex carved adobe wall has been unearthed at archaeological site at Chan Chan citadel
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABL13 Houston)
 
 
 
Something stinks in Houston. Well, more than usual anyway
source: abc13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peterborough Telegraph)
 
 
 
Friends actor David Schwimmer releases hilarious video 'proving' Ross wasn't suspect behind beer theft
source: peterboroughtoday.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
They look like cops, but they're not. In Michigan, there are no state-established training requirements, no standards for screening qualifications, and no process for monitoring their conduct and it's all perfectly legal
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Stupid: Loses license, tows boat. Fark: With a mobility scooter
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
And now for something completely different. A pedestrian crossing for silly walks
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(pedestrian.tv)
 
 
 
Couple decide to fake wedding photos of them getting held up at gunpoint on top of an active volcano to "foster discussion". Unsurprisingly, the reactions weren't too positive: "What in the fresh yt hell is this mayo encrusted bullshiat?"
source: pedestrian.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
There was a spider, but it's okay now
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Brave man with balls of steel, mind of an idiot lures 'biggest crocodile EVER' out of hiding place (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Secret Service: No bomb was sent to the White House. All bombs so far were sent to Democrats and fake news outlets
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
NewsFlash
 
Looks like CNN isn't exempt from mail bomb scavenger hunt today
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Michigan town to hold Halloween parade, although something seems to be missing. I just can't put my finger on it. What could it be? Halloween. Parade. Halloween. Parade. Hmmmm
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
It now appears someone tried to assassinate both the Clintons and the Obamas
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Billy Cosby: "I want a new trial and a reduced sentence, Your Honor." Judge: "H-E-L-L-NO"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Maybe news: Some people are petitioning to have a sculpture removed. News: It is a sculpture of Martin Luther King, Jr. FARK: because it does not even remotely look like him
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Possible bomb found at Bill and Hillary Clinton's home in New York, potentially similar to bomb sent to George Soros
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme - unlikely superheroes
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Who's a Good Boy? You are! Let's go back to the shelter and get you a family that's already trained. It's your confusing Woofday Wetnose Wednesday
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Someone can now afford TotalFark until the heat death of the universe
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WEAR Pensacola)
 
 
 
Woman plants butterfly garden. Receives note from homeowners' association saying that she is violating the rule against raising livestock
source: weartv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Looks like Ross and Rachel have broken up again
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Paddle faster. I hear artisanal ironically-played banjos
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
This year's cool Halloween costumes won't be complete without cosmetic contact lenses from the flea market, which can give you that coveted puffy red-eye look. And next year you can go as a pirate
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Five more things that are more likely to happen to you than you winning the lottery
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveLeak)
 
Video
 
CCTV video captures the most oblivious human on the planet during a bar robbery
source: liveleak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
"How can we register the case against monkeys? This will make us a laughingstock. I don't think it is a logical demand. We were definitely informed of the bizarre accident and we registered it in our case diary"
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
Weeners
 
And the USMC joins the Sky Penis arms race with a trainer out of Miramar, home of Top Gun. I feel the need....the need...for peen
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
Rage rooms: The latest self-care craze - where you can smash stuff to smithereens and probably still not feel much better about things
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
DeLand man accused of stealing De Parts from the De Planes will face De Big House
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Huh. Getting old might not be so bad. Care home hires naked butlers to serve three course meal to residents
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
What was supposed to be the cutest photo caption of the day takes a dark turn
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Police chief reinstated after police investigation finds no wrongdoing
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Hurricane Michael forces Florida to ease voting rules. People are surprised. When did Florida start adopting rules about voting?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue October 23, 2018
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Fiery gas rips through New Jersey, also some buildings burned down
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Was it over when the Germans bombed the Ventura Freeway?
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Eugene Register-Guard)
 
 
 
Are your Breasts Too Dense?, a 13-year-old boy investigative documentary
source: registerguard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
When facing an historic housing crisis and the resulting astronomical rents, there are different strategies available to combat the problem. And then there's this
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Beware the Halloween Police 🎃👮
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Major news from The AP (tweet was deleted, but it's the first post in the comments)
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Las Vegas Review Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this confident young rider
source: reviewjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Serial bomb threat caller plaguing Washington State. Seriously, guys, just give him some damn Cocoa Puffs before he hurts someone
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"My god, it's full of ice"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
He who smelt it, dealt it. With 'it' being cocaine, heroin, and marijuana
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bouncing boy
source: cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
FARC wants you to come visit them in the jungle as a tourist. Wake up early for your chance to get a close look at the legendary one-balled jungle squirrels, then join the rest of the village for some poo-flinging and beer swilling
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Virginian-Pilot)
 
 
 
Three high school students sickened after eating cereal bar laced with pot. Could this be the sign of a budding cereal killer?
source: pilotonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guitar World)
 
 
 
Do you need to fix your nut slot? Here's an easy way to fix your nut slot. NUT SLOT
source: guitarworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Six years after a severed head lead to a murder conviction in Florida, the killer emailed a TV station to give up the rest of the body
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Yes, high achievers and go-getters are out to make everyone else look bad
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
If you live near the Pantex nuclear weapons assembly plant in Texas, there's no need to be alarmed, but it also wouldn't be the worst time to take a sudden, unplanned vacation. UPDATE: Security event at Pantex has ended without incident
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Man cuts plea deal for in-flight pee deal (not safe for work)
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Massive food recall widens. At this point, if you've eaten anything you bought in a store, you should just go ahead and check yourself into the hospital
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Yes, the NAACP is there to help, but you're probably not going to be their top priority if you're a white Florida Man being pepper sprayed for attacking JetBlue employees
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
South Korea: If you plan on going to Canada to smoke pot, we will arrest you when you get back home
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Man killed inside Happy Place bar had previously been shot there. See, that's why it's always better to just take a cab
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 San Diego)
 
 
 
Yellow fever mosquitoes becoming a nuisance for San Diego residents, who fear rum and the lash are next
source: fox5sandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Caption these two boxers
source: cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox5 DC)
 
 
 
It's the only Starbucks store in the U.S. where you can order using American Sign Language, pointing to a chart, or writing down what you want - which means your name should be spelled correctly on your cup for once
source: fox5dc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
What kind of wretched piece of garbage glues a kitten to the road with the intention of it being hit by a car? Spoiler alert: kitty is 100% fine and plotting its murderous revenge
source: foxillinois.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
"Suspicious" man asks boys walking home from school to pee in a bottle. The suspicious part of the story is that the boys were walking home from school. And wait until they get jobs and have to pee in bottles all the time
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Indy100)
 
 
 
Man hires personal trainer to help him lose weight. Trainer has him banned from several restaurants and take-out places
source: indy100.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Feds find 280 pounds of cocaine in marionberry shipment at the border. Truck full of darrylstrawberries seen making a quick U-turn
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Unbelievably, this woman turned down man who bought her a sports car, flowers and put on a firework display and then yelled "I have money" at her when she said no
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Fashion design teacher charged with 353 counts of video voyeurism at school. In related news, fashion design classes are a thing now (with mugshot)
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
The new craze out of Communist China? Flaunting your wealth by pretending to fall out of your car while spilling all your luxury goods and then showing the photos to the plebs on Instagram
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Parents outraged after drag queen speaks to students during Career Day, probably because they can't afford to accessorize
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
'...a drunken night ended with a car being lit on fire and a pumpkin being thrown into the air.'
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these bathing beauties from 1951
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
USS Harry S. Truman becomes first Navy carrier to enter Arctic circle in nearly 30 years, vows to give 'em hell despite shrinkage
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Some cities have decided that it's their business to make laws placing age restrictions on trick-or-treating with potential jail time for violations. Man, who shat in their Skittles?
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Roast duck for sale. Cheap. 26,000 available. Pick up at Pennsylvania barn
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Oh noes, Canadians are so high right now they're running out of weed just days after legalisation and don't know what to do
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
If your dog impregnates your neighbor's pet, are you responsible for the vet bills? Let's see how the court ruled
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
The NFL won't allow you to buy Rae Carruth jerseys now that he's out of prison, you sick bastards
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Mustard, with the dagger, in the apartment
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
We need more of this in this timeline
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveLeak)
 
 
 
Police station video shows suspect pouring syrup on police car. Does not appear to be work of cereal vandal
source: liveleak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
♫ Yes, college was always a challenge / But one thing I liked quite a bit / Was when the kids all got together / And threw great big handfuls of... / Shaving cream, be nice and clean / Shave everyday and you'll always look keen ♫
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
CDC warns of the dangers of dressing up your cock this Halloween
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"The President of the U.S. says it's OK to grab women by their private parts"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
United aircraft diverts because *rolls dice* it's "too big"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
So you're saying there's a chance
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Subby can't keep track of who started punching whom, without provocation, after a car crashed into a utility pole. But cousins were called, and a melee ensued. Staten Island Man is the new Florida Man
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
"Thousands Of Swedes Are Inserting Microchips Under Their Skin". Subby will not divulge the specific search string he was looking for when this article popped up, but apparently in the near future he won't have to
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon October 22, 2018
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
Unrelenting sunshine and legal weed drive San Diegans to drink heavily
source: sandiegouniontribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Crazy Canuck flies off, does not survive
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Counterfeiters are already selling Rocket City Trash Pandas merchandise online, despite the fact that the team's logo hasn't been released yet
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
If your drone just crashed through a window in midtown Manhattan just let it go
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
You may know recently-deceased Joachim Ronneberg as the man who interrupted a ski weekend to destroy Hitler's nuclear ambitions
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lad Bible)
 
 
 
School bans bags so student brings his books to school in a microwave
source: ladbible.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Signs that you're not a high-ranking member of your hit squad: Your job is to put on the still-warm clothes of the guy you've just murdered, and walk around town pretending to be him
source: news.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(24/7 Wall Street)
 
 
 
Worst oil spill in US history was from A: Exxon Valdez? B: Deepwater Horizon? or C: The Taylor Energy spill which is STILL leaking 300 and 700 barrels of oil per day off the Louisiana coast and may leak for another 80 years
source: 247wallst.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these creative baseball fans
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Tonight on Paul's Memory Bank (8PM EDT) instead of 'walking' or 'running' songs, we'll have two hours of songs containing in the title or lyrics modes of transportation requiring some sort of mechanical assistance
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
If you've ever been on an AmTrak and thought to yourself, "Man. If I could only make myself a handbag out of the fart-ridden leather that's being used for the seats, that would be something" then we have some news for you. Also, get help
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Highway workers discover 130,000-year-old wooly mammoth skeleton. Well, one of them discovered it. The other eight just stood around and watched
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bothell-Kenmore Reporter)
 
 
 
Suspect spray-paints 'Strange' onto Panera Bread. Probably some weird loafer
source: bothell-reporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
It's a bad sign when the ship you're using to monitor ocean temperatures needs to slow down because the ocean is too hot to cool its engines
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Bible museum admits five of its Dead Sea Scrolls are modern fakes. Investigators were tipped off by the pervasive incidence of emojis throughout
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this dry lake bed
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
China's top representative to Macau dies after "Falling from building". Hong Kong and Macau Office of the Chinese government's State Council says he had been suffering from depression. Oh sure
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
You might want to sit down for this, but home remodeling reality shows on television may not be a really good way of getting accurate information regarding planning for and pricing your next home remodeling project
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
Replica Titanic II to follow the original Titanic's route and promises an "authentic Titanic experience. Because if there's one thing people are always asking for on cruises it's the full Titanic experience
source: realtalk910.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live Science)
 
 
 
There's a good chance that aliens are purple. Likelihood of their also being one-eyed, one-horned, or people eaters still undetermined
source: livescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Turkey named 'Smoke' stalks streets of Ashwaubenon
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Amateur sleuths abort mission to find wreckage of Flight MH370 in Cambodian jungle after they didn't follow TLC's advice (possible nsfw content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Man sues haunted house for being 'too scary'. Also tries suing coffee maker for being 'too hot' and Duke for being 'too sucky'
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Oumuamua, one year later. Do-dooo-de-doo-doo
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Saudi King Salman, Crown Prince Mohammed offer apologies to Khashoggi's son, will have changed their stories 3-4 more times by the end of the day
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Man orders two waters at NC hot dog restaurant, then leaves $10,000 tip. Pic helps explain why
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
"A recent survey found that "investing in decent cutlery and enjoying a garden centre" are definite signs that you're officially middle aged"
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
The notorious 'Piggyback Bandit' has been arrested at a high school football game again, this time in Alabama
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Caption these women and their tortoises
source: image.pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
"Co-living" is on the rise in cities where a gutted middle class no longer earns enough to live where they work. Picture dorm living without the benefit of your own door to hang a sock on, and then triple the price
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Five school shootings were thwarted in October, one of which was last Thursday, in the next county over from where Drew's kids go to school
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Something seems to be missing from this list but I can't put my finger on it
source: gizmodo.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bear
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
PETA must only drink chocolate milk
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Christian missionaries have all but eradicated an ancient jungle tribe, just as Jesus intended
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Violent assault occurs at a Mahler symphony after someone rustled a bag of gum
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
Ten-year-old boy shoots twin sister in the head after finding gun in car while dad shopped at Tennessee Dollar General. UPDATE: The sister has passed away
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Seems NYPD will try anything to get out of wearing body cams
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
Brave man defends his family from zombies by punching, shoving them down stairs outside Park City theater. Well, they were just teen girls costumed as Thiller dance zombies, but that took guts
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Add palm trees to list of things that can kill you in Florida. So, stay alert, don't get caught napping
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post Canada)
 
 
 
Woman faces charges for practicing witchcraft in backward, benighted country of Canada
source: huffingtonpost.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
New York public housing tenants facing off against giant rats invading their homes
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"The beat was about to drop," and then it dropped
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Not news: builder gets fined $900 per day for work done without building permit. Fark: Which adds up to $41 million
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Behold, the visage of he who would break into a house of prayer and steal money from the donation box
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
These are only a small percentage of links submitted. Join TotalFark to see them all!

Link archives »






On Twitter




In Other Media
X
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.