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Sun May 13, 2018
(CNN)
 
 
 
Tag is about to explode as the woman who invented Mother's Day actually came to hate it
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
What's this all afoot, eh?
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fiery bunch of peppers
source: d6d2h4gfvy8t8.cloudfront.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Not sure about that cop math. Millions, you say?
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
White man goes on racist rant against Muslim woman wearing a niqab while standing in line at a coffee shop. The barista's actions, however, speak volumes
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
The UK may charge adults $20 for passes that prove they're adults so they can enjoy their porn legally
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Local man believes standing up to Uncle Sam more important than running from Pele. Also enjoys sniffing sulfur vents
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Arizona police hunt serial laundry sniffer. All hope the Tide will turn and they'll soon Wisk him away
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
This Mother's Day, why not try something the whole family can do together, like suicide bombing
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this urban reflection
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
"If we let everybody go, there'd be nobody in prison..." says country with one of the highest per capita incarceration rates in the world
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Meal)
 
 
 
And the winner for most popular coffee brand is ... (drumroll) ... hey, sit down Starbucks. You too, McD's. And I don't know you're looking so smug, Dunkin' ... (clears throat) ... and the winner is Krispy Kreme
source: thedailymeal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
That woman who stranded the cable worker high up in a bucket truck? Yeah, she did it because the truck was idling outside her home and yes she's done similar before
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Town acts like it's 1699 AD
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Because of course United would eject a black woman and her kids from a plane at the request of a white man
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(High Times)
 
 
 
Do you think you're being funny? Are you mocking us? Maybe you'd like some time to think about your smart talk . . . in gaol
source: hightimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Oakland residents throw a huge barbecue and invite everyone except the woman who called cops on the black family barbecuing in the same park
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Delish.com)
 
 
 
"Jif upside down still says Jif... my entire life is a lie"
source: delish.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Bath)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Roman bathhouse
source: bath.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Elite Daily)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Celebrating Mother's Day with Dad
source: elitedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Old and busted: how many horses you have under your hood. New Hotness: how many rats you have under your hood
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
A farewell to the most dependable member of the family: The washing machine
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
These are truly American Cars
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
North Korea has offered to abandon their nuclear testing site which they've already destroyed by accident. What kind of idiot thinks this is a grand peace gesture?
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
Labrador mix snaps doggie group selfie (w/ must-see pic)
source: cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Man charged in illegal shooting of hamlet's popular 3-legged deer unsurprisingly doesn't have a leg to stand on
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 12, 2018
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
How eggsasperating
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Stealing a police cruiser is generally a bad idea, however stealing a police cruiser while handcuffed is actually kind of impressive
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"It's like Mean Girls, only everyone is 80"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
China struggles with a huge graveyard problem ... for old bikes
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Cantilever)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bridgework
source: cdn.vox-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Gallant: Day care owner takes prompt action after video shows teacher telling kids to throw rocks at a classmate. Goofus: By firing the whistleblower
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Trump to meet with California officials to reconcile efficency/pollution standards. Hopes to return to the glory days of coal powered cars
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Thief steals large valuable stamp collection. Suspect philately denies it
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(France 24)
 
 
 
Réinitialiser l'horloge
source: france24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Jogging + Juggling = Joggling
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Total Frat Move)
 
 
 
Photoshop this golf party aftermath
source: cdn.totalfratmove.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
"Senior center is closed. The moose out front shoulda' told you"
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Boasting a turbo-charged 400 brake horsepower engine, the Fastest Shed is to attempt a new speed record this weekend
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Racked)
 
 
 
So what, exactly, IS "mom hair"?
source: racked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Cop Life magazine readers rate Kansas least fun place to work
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Meh, always knew octopuses are really "aliens" from another planet that came here as frozen eggs millions of years ago. Why else would they be so smart? (possible nsfw content on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS San Francisco)
 
 
 
If you're in San Francisco and wondering why there are discarded needles lying all over the place, you can thank city government
source: sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Here's a simple video to explain to the rest of the world why Americans still insist on using Fahrenheit instead of the obviously superior and eminently logical Celsius
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My ND Now)
 
 
 
If you happen to come across a case of 40mm grenades, the folks up there at Minot Air Force Base would sure appreciate a phone call from you
source: myndnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Protip: If you have 2 million dollars worth of meth in your car, don't tailgate. You might get pulled over
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Australian high school teacher becomes national hero with Facebook post on how to make McDonald's Chicken McNuggets at home. Since her nugget debut, she has "new found cred among her students"
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Border Mail (Australia))
 
 
 
Wait... who the hell gets lost while geocaching?
source: bordermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this young explorer
source: nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Change your name, move overseas, consider massive facial reconstructive surgery, because 65k texts girl is back and on video
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pacific Standard Magazine)
 
 
 
Hide the little spoons
source: psmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(EuroNews)
 
 
 
Fuzzy Wuzzy was a cat, so much fur - just look at that, and to the zoo they have made their way, just in time for Caturday
source: euronews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gallup)
 
 
 
Average American predicts retiring at age 66. They also predict learning a new language, playing a musical instrument and losing 50 pounds
source: news.gallup.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
This Mother's Day, get your mom what she really wants: Paid parental leave for all future parents
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
US fighter jets intercepted Russian bombers heading for Alaskan/US air space. Because this is fine. We're all fine here
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Are you a real grammar nazi or just a poser? Take this New York Times copy editing quiz and find out
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
NZ's Girl Guides to stop selling biscuits in 2019, on grounds that it's a distraction from the "core purposes" of Girl Guiding. That really dips my crisps
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
School evacuated when someone calls in a bong threat. You read that correctly
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fredericksburg)
 
 
 
Morons in Utah have a new hobby: destroying dinosaur tracks
source: fredericksburg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
A headline you don't see every day: Terrified tourists run for cover as robot dragon bursts into flames during Disney parade in the Magic Kingdom
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Dam
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
13-year-old orders a horse on the internet, has it delivered to her grandmother's back yard. And you thought your kid's in-app purchases were bad
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Student phished his teachers' logon credentials and changed his grades and those of other students. The Secret Service got involved and now he is facing 14 felonies. No word if he tried to play a game of Global Thermonuclear War
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Live feed of a nasty wildfire just north of Prescott, AZ. 30mph winds are helping it eat up houses
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Man sues Halo Top ice cream because halos are usually yellow and yellow reminds him of butter and butter is usually creamy and Halo Top is not creamy so therefore it's false advertising
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Next time you are at a BBQ and the hostess asks you if you want a thigh, make sure she is cooking chicken
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Help coral reefs by drinking beer. With the help of Farkers, there will be more coral than the ocean can handle
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 11, 2018
(WTOP)
 
 
 
National Zoo solicits votes for name of new Holstein. Cowie McCowFace not on the ballot
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
New Mexico wants to charge a $50 fee for keeping bees; says the fee will go toward inspections. As in: "Let's see the bees." "Here they are." "Thank you. That will be $50, please"
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin News KXAN)
 
 
 
Today is the 112th birthday of Richard Overton, the oldest living World War II veteran and oldest living man in the U.S. His secret to a long life; Keep living, don't die, and stay off his lawn
source: kxan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
An Australian who has rare antibodies that fight Rhesus D hemolytic disease, who has donated blood 1173 times 60 years, has been medically forced into retirement at 81. Doctors estimate his donations have saved 2.4 MILLION babies. Good on ya, mate
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Florida: We had a sinkhole outbreak. New Zealand: Hold my beer
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WISTV)
 
 
 
If an arrestee can kick out a window of a patrol car and jump onto a highway while the vehicle is moving, and later kick out the window of a 2nd patrol car that comes to help, maybe you need to update your cars, South Carolina
source: wistv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Q13 Fox)
 
 
 
Breeding Wolverine is the name of my R-rated Disney on Ice show
source: q13fox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Florida man hid legless fugitive girlfriend in plastic tote and even remembered to make some airholes
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bismarck Tribune)
 
 
 
And here I thought a treehouse would be a perfect hiding spot
source: bismarcktribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Protip for women wanting a mind blowing orgasm: Blow your nose first
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
NOLA restaurant marks 100 years in business. "Arnaud never stopped serving alcohol during prohibition....Legend has it that many of the judges were very good customers of Arnaud's and were enjoying what Count Arnaud was serving in the coffee cups,"
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Pencil boxes are the latest casualty in scholastic war against designer goods
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this female greenery
source: 78.media.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"My joint pain went away, my sleep became excellent, my skin improved. I no longer had any bloating, cramping or other digestive problems, my libido went back to what it was in my 20s and my blood pressure normalised" - Shawn Baker, Carnivore King
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Seattle's serial masturbator at it again on city bus. Bonus: was previously caught masturbating while waiting in line to register as sex offender
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Mechanics)
 
 
 
Either it's been lost or something's up because the U.S. Army is looking for a new submachine gun
source: popularmechanics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
If you left your child Typhoid Mary at a MA daycare center recently, State health officials would like a word with you
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Cow bras are udderly mental
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
"Volcano park's closed. Flying boulder out front shoulda told ya"
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Scientists discover why dogs go crazy when they see a squirrel
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
Judge suspends license of psychiatrist who drank a pint of vodka before treating patients
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Miami airport asks Orlando airport to prom. Of course, it probably won't work out, as they both have lots of baggage
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 10 Phoenix)
 
 
 
Teacher arrested for public drunkenness. Fark: While chaperoning HS prom
source: fox10phoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
A "globe earther" reports on a flat earth convention, and ... it's exactly what you'd expect
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this block party
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Rather than get warrants, one sheriff used a marketing service to track GPS signals of phones, including those belonging to other cops and even judges
source: mobile.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
Boobies
 
Woman arrested in upstate New York for gardening topless sues local police who were apparently never kept abreast of state law
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Get your shocked face ready. That Yale student? She's done this before
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Who'd have thought that the term "hairless puppy" could become a euphemism for something rude? Facebook, apparently
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spaceflight Now)
 
 
 
Elon Musk has reached his final form. It's the debut launch of the Falcon 9 Block 5 with a comms satellite for Bangladesh. Liftoff from Canaveral, first-stage landing on a drone ship. Launch window opens at 4:14 pm EDT (UPDATE: Launch rescheduled for Friday)
source: spaceflightnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Naked man at Daytona Beach airport seen on the baggage carousel shouting, "We've got to get out of here" Thankfully, The Sun wasn't there
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Snowflake parents across Britain are changing the endings of classic fairytales when they read them to their children because they're too scary or could send youngsters the wrong message
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
Now that they figure the Internet has moved on and nobody's really paying attention anymore Texas charter school has reinstated teacher who caused an uproar by assigning kids homework asking them to list the positive and negative aspects of slavery
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Dentists offer a "free whitening" service, decide to dress in traditional Japanese, Native American, and Scottish garb for the ad campaign. Naturally, people are upset
source: cbs17.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
You mean that a 6th grade teacher asking their students' HIV status before a class trip is unacceptable?
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seven Days)
 
 
 
Elks Club Secretary calls cops on disruptive, drug-using, trespassing Black gang, errr, champion high school poets who were scheduled to be honored at the club that evening. Fortunately jailarity, shootarity do not ensue
source: sevendaysvt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
French family at Dutch safari park learns that reality is less like "Tarzan" and more like "Jurassic Park." NSFW language as several pairs of pantalons are filled with merde
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
♪ Hello my baby / hello my honey / hello my ragtime gal / send me a kiss by wire / baby my heart's on fire ♪
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Avoid the blister beetle at all cost. This is not a euphemism for unsafe sex
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 San Diego)
 
 
 
Time to reset your stopwatches
source: fox5sandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHO TV Des Moines)
 
 
 
Reunited high school sweethearts get married in front of school 30 years after splitting up. Groomsmen seen smoking pot behind the equipment shed
source: whotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
We have found 'ground zero' of the amphibian apocalypse. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: news.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(North Jersey)
 
 
 
If you don't give a bear a cubcake, he'll break the window of your car and take one. When he's finished eating the cubcake, he'll want another and another and another and another and another and another and another and another and another and another
source: northjersey.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Caption this gaping gosling
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WREG Memphis)
 
 
 
Argument over peach cobbler leaves man with a gunshot wound. Man, they take that stuff seriously down south
source: wreg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Sheriff learns you can't lend out jail inmates for personal work at county officials' homes
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
"Dog shoots owner in the leg in Iowa and appears to cry." Your dog wants an assault rifle
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Since it's Friday, one glass of white wine increases your risk of prostate cancer. Tomorrow, a glass of red wine will take ten strokes off your golf game, and your Sunday morning mimosa will cause your bladder to swell to the size of a basketball
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Principal's 'birthday spanking' tradition ends after parents complain that the cheerleading team always went first
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
Weeners
 
Mum unwittingly buys penis-shaped pasta at market, cooks and serves it to her two young daughters, is so "mortified" she posts incident to Facebook where Britain's best news site hoovers it up
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
Firefighters rescue 3-year-old from inside a claw machine at laundromat. It took 46 attempts and $92
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scientific American)
 
 
 
Take a moment and raise your beer glass to thank the drunk mice for us humans finally getting a hangover pill
source: scientificamerican.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Florida Man wrangles 12-foot hammerhead shark onto beach and...OMG LOOK AT THOSE ABS
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this concussion moment
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hawaii News Now)
 
 
 
Apparently cows are a unit of measurement in volcanology
source: hawaiinewsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Brisbane Times)
 
 
 
Mass shooting in Australia. Looks like we need to come up with another example
source: brisbanetimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"You know, no one can argue with you about greenhouse gases if you don't keep track of them in the first place"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Coos Bay World)
 
 
 
The recent volcanic activity in Hawaii might be a sign that Cascadia could be next
source: theworldlink.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Suburban Atlanta police officer suspended after police dash cam recorded him swearing at 65-year-old grandmother during a traffic stop
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
To serve and protect. Not to pay taxes, no, just the servin' and protectin'
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Miners in South Africa suffering from deadly lung disease get $400 million settlement. Finally, they can breathe a little easier
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
US gun deaths soaring in the past two years. Why, how did that happen? It's like all our thoughts and prayers mean nothing
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 10, 2018
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Bernice King, daughter of MLK, calls for Waffle House boycott after latest incident captured on video
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Magazine)
 
 
 
Photoshop this entertainer
source: pixel.nymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
It is better to ask for forgiveness than for permission. Unless you build your house 30 inches too tall and the town council says, "Fark you, tear it down." Then you should have asked for permission first
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Teen tries to steal the unlocked, keys-in-ignition truck of Blake Bortles, somehow fails
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
State trooper uses homemade jerky to rescue pup from highway. Good Boy
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Massive sinkhole outbreak leaves Florida neighborhood looking like the moon
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Another Tesla crashes, makes news because it's a Tesla. Autopilot was not engaged, maybe we should just admit that no matter what we do to a car, some moron will find a way to crash it?
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Someone designed a pair of leather BDSM headphones, but somehow neglected to name them 'Beats by mistress'
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pantagraph)
 
 
 
Police chief blames "poor choice of words," says maybe dogs won't be killed
source: pantagraph.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blog Toronto)
 
 
 
Wanna get crabs? Ride Toronto transit
source: blogto.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters Media)
 
 
 
Photoshop this persistent creeper
source: s2.reutersmedia.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Body of burglar lays in open casket under gazebo outside mother's house for three days. It's too late. You've awakened the gazebo. It catches you and eats you
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 21 News)
 
 
 
Skateboarding behind a car is not a crime. Driving the car is a felony
source: fox21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
So you are about to die. What are some of the last words you speak? A) I had a good life B) I regret nothing C) This is taking longer than expected
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Skipper court-martialed for destroying Humvees, repeatedly assaulting Gilligan with hat
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
The Grenfell fire that killed 72 was due to flammable insulation. Fark: Non-flammable might have been cheaper. Ultrafark: Same mistake made on 300 other buildings
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Teenage boy seen in retention pond flailing and screaming about having been bitten before going under water. Police search the pond and find the body....of an adult woman. Wait, what?
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
I saw Unexpected Walruses open for Leaping Orcas in '86. I didn't know they were still together and touring
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Waffle House calls police on black customers after prom, presumably for the crime of going to Waffle House for dinner after prom
source: news.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lowering the Bar)
 
 
 
Lawyer whose name legally contains an exclamation point: "Pulling a man over for a shrubbery he couldn't even see is legally the same as cutting down a mighty tree with a herring. It can't be done"
source: loweringthebar.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Awww look at these ADORABLE bengal kittens somebody abandoned way out here in the desert. Let's just take them home and give them some milk and ow, Ow OOOOWWW. Honey, would you google "what does a bobcat look like?" for me?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Holy Frith, have they called the Owsla?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Asian Age)
 
 
 
Another reason not to get tattoos: they can confuse the shiat out of surgeons
source: asianage.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
So what is killing the West Coast's young great white sharks? Besides knights in golden armor, that is
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Indian investor in revolutionary electric device that could magnetize rice has second thoughts after the dedicated 'scientists' kept cancelling experiments due to bad weather. His first thoughts were worth $200,000
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
♪♬Let's all go to the Dairy Queen/ I see one just over there/We're all going to the Dairy Queen/ to get ice cream for my bear ♪♬
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Northwest Herald)
 
 
 
School officials: There are a few kids out there Juuling, so we need to act. How about we take away all bathroom doors and ban USB drives? That sound reasonable?
source: nwherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Confused tourists are asking Notting Hill bookshop so many questions about the movie that they've put up sign disowning it: "This is not the shop from the rubbish film. So don't ask. We don't know where it is either"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Photoshop this early cell phone
source: images.mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Man visits porn site, gets following email:"Given Above mentioned software forced selfie camera of yours notebook computer. And this way I have black PR package against you. On that vidoerecord [sic] you flog the dummy"
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Black grad student at Yale falls asleep in dorm's common room so naturally, another student wakes her up so she won't be late for class. Ha ha, just kidding, she calls the cops
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tulsa World)
 
 
 
Police find creative way to explain that biker they shot
source: tulsaworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
New app will let you know just how many packs you're "smoking" by breathing in the air in major cities throughout the world
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spokesman Review)
 
 
 
Anybody can rescue a cat stuck in a tree. It takes a special kind of firefighter to rescue a cow stuck in a tree
source: spokesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medium)
 
 
 
So they just bombed Hawai'i? And you can fuel up across the sea? Take the long way home. Take the long way home
source: medium.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Vanessa Trump, Wild Thing
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Chicken farmer mystified at low egg production
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLWT)
 
 
 
Ohio company giving away thousands of cucumbers after receiver rejects load -- That's what she said
source: wlwt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Alexa, why is the nation's largest homebuilder spying on me?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Hawaii working on its Krakatoa impression
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Iran demonstrates they're ready to come to the table and make a deal by firing 20 rockets at Israel
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 679: "Happy Farktography Anniversary 13". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Legislature votes to ban a judge's ruling that banned state agency from not banning water use, and no one knows what it means
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 09, 2018
(Battle for the Net)
 
 
 
The battle for net neutrality isn't lost. Keep fighting. Contact your lawmakers to save net neutrality
source: battleforthenet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
So, how exactly did the scientists working on osteoporosis cure end up figuring out that it would also cure baldness if used as a shampoo? (possible nsfw content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
After winning a race to be the mayor of a North Carolina town by just 7 votes, it would have been wise to have just one glass of champagne during the celebration
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
"If you heard a young woman yelling in terror, don't be alarmed, it was just me panicking over this pile of snakes"
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Arch)
 
 
 
Photoshop this old stone bridge
source: traditionaliconoclast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Yo mama so stupid, she can't even keep a job driving a school bus
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KGUN 9 Tucson)
 
 
 
Florida Woman meets Arizona Man, goes on one date, proceeds to send over 65k text messages. Then the real stalking began
source: kgun9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Jefferson Davis Highway to be renamed Lee, like every other damn road in Northern Virginia
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Student presents thesis In her underwear after professor questions her choice of clothing. She encourages audience to strip as well. Pays Cornell $60K tuition next fall in singles
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Why is it darn near impossible to find good avocados this time of year? They're all either too mushy or too hard. Smear some on toast as you enjoy the Weekly Weird News Quiz, April 29-May 5 Avocado Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
That Mustang eaten by lava? Indeed, it was abandoned because it wouldn't start
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC DFW)
 
 
 
Elementary school teacher sues public school district after being threatened with dismissal, reassigned to high school for "Get To Know Your Teacher" slideshow that had photos of her parents, best friends, 'future wife.'
source: nbcdfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Real Clear Life)
 
 
 
JonBenet joins the Boy in the Box as victims whose killers may be identified by forensic genealogy
source: realclearlife.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
 
 
Semi truck carrying $800K in dimes crashes off I-15 northeast of Las Vegas
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Noh Guys)
 
 
 
Photoshop this theatrical dance
source: millertheatre.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
So that is what Beavis is doing these days
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USGS)
 
 
 
The USGS has issued a warning that the Kilauea volcano could be entering an explosive phase launching blocks of material up to 6 feet in diameter a kilometer in every direction
source: volcanoes.usgs.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 32 Chicago)
 
 
 
Man's attack on a 5-foot-tall, Muslim female Door Dash delivery driver didn't go exactly as he planned. With mugshot goodness
source: fox32chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Delish.com)
 
 
 
Instead of getting to wear a costume once a year, your dog (or cat) can lounge inside a hot dog bun looking hilarious every single day
source: delish.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Overturned tanker truck turns Polish road into hershey highway
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
FIU would appreciate it if you did not view pictures of the large cracks that were discovered in the pedestrian bridge long before it was lifted into place
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reader's Digest)
 
 
 
From drunken kings to runaway horses, even royal weddings have their share of flubs
source: rd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Keep Catholicism weird
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
A Belgian driver was shocked to learn recently that his Opel Astra, which is the same as a Chevy Cruze, had a top speed of over 400 mph
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Caption this guy and the lava he is facing
source: cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
If your garage catches fire and police manage to save seven dogs, you might live in Indiana
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Earthquakes. Molten lava. What next? How about some acid rain for Hawaii
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Visit Rome this summer. Come and see ancient wonders like the Colosseum, toss a coin into the Trevi Fountain and behold the spontaneously combusting buses
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
"How many boobs do you have?" Airline worker screams at mom in breastfeeding carry-on controversy
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
18-month-old in crib narrowly misses being shot by a drunk guy a half mile away playing with his new gun. Super crib stops the bullet, saves the day
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
I believe... that in 2018 God changed his mind about the Boy Scouts
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Virginia students charged with conspiring via text to kill one of their classmates. Fark: Girl students. WTFark: The ringleader is 11 and her accomplice is 10
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"Hi Citymapper - why is there a picture of an orgy when I type in Hampstead Heath?"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
This is the nicest crack house you will ever see
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Bookmakers refuse £100 bet that Earth is flat. "I am sure that I am right, but willing to be proven wrong, a bookmaker just needs to step up to the plate and take my bet, I would have thought they would like the easy money"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sitting room view
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Life With Dogs)
 
 
 
Seems like the weather has gone to the dogs, just in time for Woofday Wetnose Wednesday
source: lifewithdogs.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Cops pull driver over for using his phone behind wheel - who panics and immediately confesses to massive cocaine operation at his house
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Eeeeeeeebolaaaaaaaa
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
A reminder that guns are not allowed to be carried on aircraft, even if they are Hello Kitty pink
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
If your brazen iPhone has been stolen, we may have found the culprits
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 29 Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Has Bigfoot been spotted in the NJ Pine Barrens? Short answer: No. Long answer: Noooooo
source: fox29.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10TV Columbus)
 
 
 
Male student pulls up dress of female student, says he was "just playing." Girl lectures him about how it's wrong and demands an apology. Ha ha no, she grabs a pair of scissors and stabs him
source: 10tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
Video
 
Watch out for the cornhole, bud
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Light Sabers, a part of living
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
Woman throws ashes of relative who died in police custody into face of LAPD chief. Police can't remember which victim this was again, on account of there being so many of them
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
"Somebody help me. Somebody come to my office and get the lizard please - I'm gonna cry, I have sandals on - I have sandals on"
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Well, the CDC ruined poppy seed muffins for everyone
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
More than 30,000 nursing home eviction notices to be sent out in Louisiana on Thursday because FU old people, that's why
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Pedestrian fatalities skyrocket in U.S. as marijuana, texting increase and hold on a second, I have to take a right turn up here
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Indy Week)
 
 
 
Absolute proof that Duke sucks
source: indyweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 08, 2018
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
If you have an active arrest warrant, do not make a bet with your friend about how deeply you can submerge your truck in a lake
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ledger-Enquirer)
 
 
 
Man steals 55-inch TV from Walmart, then asks police at nearby precinct for ride home. Fifth time charged with shoplifting doesn't seem to be the charm
source: ledger-enquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Republic)
 
 
 
"Capitalism, as it's practiced in the United States, has broken economics"
source: newrepublic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
You sunk my Blankenship
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Right on cue
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Despite all the warnings, tourists don't seem to care about Hawaii's erupting volcano. Could the media be sensationalizing the event? WaPo is there
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: A Farking cheat sheet for you
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this creepy puppet
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 San Francisco)
 
 
 
Homeless man forces his way into car and makes stranger drive him to KFC. To be fair, once those fortnightly cravings kick in, you'll do anything
source: abc7news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
Five-foot shark wanting to make friends and talk about Jesus swims inside the surf line and clears out entire Emerald Isle beach. (Vertical video trigger warning)
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lehigh Valley Live)
 
 
 
Parents of dead kid haven't used drugs for years, well okay they smoked a little bit of weed. Okay weed and a little bit of heroin. Alright weed a little bit of heroin and some Suboxone and that's it. So weed, heroin, Suboxone and meth but that's it
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
The Florida teacher's co-workers began worrying about his behavior as early as 2009, when he was reportedly found with a student with the lights dimmed and his shoes off
source: mypalmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
 
 
"'Vampire facial' gains popularity in North Carolina"
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Welcome to America. Fear is what we're selling, and business... is... good
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
The CEO of one of America's largest credit unions embezzled money for 5 years so he could buy millions of lottery tickets
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Ric Romero finds living on Hawaiian volcanoes is affordable but risky
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Gal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this spring cleaning
source: survivalbased.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Police say baby 'smelled like beer' when mom was pulled over for driving drunk. Yes, the next generation of Farkers is coming along nicely
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charlotte Observer)
 
 
 
That's some good shootin' there, Lou: Officer needs two rounds of .45acp to down a single jaywalking groundhog, at a range of about 10 feet
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Man with houseful of drugs tells deputies he's a 'hobbyist'
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Michigan police department: Hey, let's change our name to "PoPo", that'll really reach the young folk. Young folk: What a load of "PooPoo"
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
NewsFlash
 
The cloud is moving nearer still, Nuclear deal comes in view, Nuclear deal I blew, And Iran, Iran's so far away, I've gotta get away
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
There's nothing like a drunk Brit interrupting a street breakdancing performance to show off her backflipping ability
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Father of the year competitor goes for the win by hogtying daughter
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Could the reason that we haven't met aliens yet be because they're all trapped on super high gravity worlds that they can't escape from? Subby's not sure, but would like to keep that excuse on file for the next time he can't make it into work
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
A 91-year-old man is arrested for firing a shot at the car in front of him at a McDonald's drive-thru 'because they weren't moving fast enough'. OK who here hasn't at least wanted to push the car out of the way for the same reason?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2018-04-29 to Sat 2018-05-05
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Caption Darth Vader and Chewbacca on vacation
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Submerged Ford Pinto found at bottom of Lake Michigan. No word if it's been safely disarmed yet
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
UFO struck by lightning bolt, followed by flying hammer
source: outerplaces.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
'Herter would often ride a scooter up and down the street with a sword.'
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Woman's 'runny nose' turns out to be brain fluid leak. No word how many submissions she greenlit
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
It's fight season for Little League parents
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WNEP Scranton)
 
 
 
2-year-old chihuahua abandoned in Post Office lobby is cute enough to deserve his own stamp
source: wnep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
"Hmm, just got a text from the government..." *YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE. lol* Hilarity ensues
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this seemingly sensible guy
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
British expert on UFOs: Mate, I'm not sayin' it was aliens, but it was bloody aliens alright (with picture of some starlings that are not actually UFOs)
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Suddenly - raccoons
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Hipster chef doesn't think his cunning pretentious hipster dessert all the way through when serving it to the Japanese Prime Minister
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Being thirsty for beer is not a medical emergency worthy of a call to 911
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Crunch)
 
 
 
Uber autonomous driving software apparently capable of detecting when someone is homeless and not worth stopping for
source: techcrunch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
It's not the beach nudity, it's the "meercats"
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
If the FDA ever approves medical marijuana, say goodbye to the era of smoking joints. "Using a lung as a drug delivery vehicle isn't optimal"
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS8 San Diego)
 
 
 
Come to downtown San Diego for the ocean and Comic-Con. Stay to reset the clock
source: cbs8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
Woman winds up with hole in her head after nightclub power drill attack. "It is my understanding that the victim has since told medical staff that she heard the noise of the drill and felt her head being twisted"
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Florida man was just trying to open a beer with a knife. What could possibly go wrong?
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Thieves flee in canoe from underwear-clad homeowner in flood zone
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pantagraph)
 
 
 
Illinois is very concerned that legalizing THC will have a devastating impact on police and K9 employment. Finally, someone understands the true danger
source: pantagraph.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Biloxi Sun Herald)
 
 
 
Man steals a front-end loader, uses it to play bumper cars in a Walmart parking lot because "he thought it was the end of the world and zombies were chasing him"
source: sunherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KMOV St. Louis)
 
 
 
Not news: Man barbecues. Fark: Meaning he set a hotel on fire. Ultra Fark: In order to barbecue alleged child molesters
source: kmov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon May 07, 2018
(Patch)
 
 
 
Woman pumps 6.468 gallons of gasoline into her car, then realizes it's listed at $9.99 per gallon. Clerk tells her new gas station isn't even open yet
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Family forgets to check meth levels when moving into their new home which sucks because their teeth start falling out almost immediately
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
New addition to the long list of things that will kill you in Australia: "HIV's cousin"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sheepish invasion
source: cdn3.spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Tonight at 8PM EDT, Paul's Memory Bank brings you two hours of songs that peaked on a Billboard chart in the month of May ranging from 1963 through 1984. If there's dead air where the DJ should be talking, blame new flight sim software
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
If you're a Satanist, one of the evil spells you can cast is "to stop someone from hating you"
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Hive)
 
 
 
Vancouver man arrested for SCTV cosplay; trial to be held Thursday at 9
source: dailyhive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
A lesson from 84 years ago that still applies today: In a duel between a spider and a scorpion, always bet on chloroform
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Oxford standoff between armed men, police and gunman, shows the importance of the Oxford Comma
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Minnesota)
 
 
 
Man running piñata business at home fills order for piñatas representing white, Latino, and black wedding party, hangs them on front porch. Hilarity ensues
source: minnesota.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Ford Mustang:"You shall not pass." Lava flow:"OM NOM NOM"
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Not news: Kid gets C+ on essay about Ian McEwan's novel. Fark: It's Ian McEwan's kid, and he helped him write it
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
George Zimmerman accused of stalking. Luckily before he killed someone this time
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Yorker)
 
 
 
Won't somebody please think of the vaping children
source: newyorker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Snip)
 
 
 
Photoshop this prune
source: res.cloudinary.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Why would a inmate want to stay in prison even when their sentence is up? Because of the illegal diamond mine they're running from underneath their jail
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
89 year old "Nazi Grandma" now a fugitive after failing to report for prison. Authorities now looking for U-boat heading for Argentina
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Above the Law)
 
 
 
Law school staffer arrested after faking being at work for over a year while hanging out at Hooters in Las Vegas
source: abovethelaw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Twin baby boys doing well after receiving bone marrow donation from their 4-year-old brother. 'I saved them because I'm a superhero'
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
♪ Bottle of red, bottle of white, shouldn't have served it to that 79 year old woman crashing through your Italian restaurant
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Curse-averse researchers conclude there is no hidden room in Tutankhamun's tomb
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Baby born in Chipotle parking lot gets a burrito themed baby shower at the restaurant. No word it they named him Coli
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Hello? Geico? Yeah I just hit another vehicle with my pick-up truck. The other vehicle? Well, it's a Boeing 737 with the words "Southwest Airlines" painted on it
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 61 Connecticut)
 
 
 
Bears are very unpopular kitchen island accessories
source: fox61.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(2paragraphs)
 
 
 
The drug company that makes Acthar responded [on video] after it raised the price to $40,000 a vial -- from $40. Dr. Evil apparently wrote the response. They jacked the price in part "to ensure increased patient access." Note: it's for sick babies
source: 2paragraphs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWLP)
 
 
 
Bernardston Mass residents vote on prohibiting retail marijuana sales. This will not be a problem because no one has ever been to Bernardston and no one wants to go to Bernardston
source: wwlp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Amazing Artwork
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
University of Florida says it is ending its "Get Off The Stage Now, Minstrel" policy
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Man wanted for harassing moose. This sounds like a self-correcting problem
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJRT)
 
 
 
Off-duty officer shows why schools should be gun-free zones
source: abc12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
If at first you don't succeed in riding your lawn mower across town while intoxicated, try, try again
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
School district accidentally tells all their third graders they're above average
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belleville News-Democrat)
 
 
 
The end of the world is coming, so buy real estate from Jim Bakker
source: bnd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Pro-Kremlin Cossacks and Hells Angels to provide security at upcoming World Cup
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
"Rosenstein and top F.B.I. officials have come to suspect" "some lawmakers were using their oversight authority to gain intelligence about that investigation so that it could be shared with the White House", which was obvious to Farkers months ago
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
2012: I swear to God, if I'm still working at this gas station when I'm 24 I'll set myself on fire
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Situation in Leilani Estates goes from bad to "Lava is coming out"
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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