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Sun February 18, 2018
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Kim Dotcom weighs 360 pounds
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Museum of Candy opening in New York. Peeps to be rejected on general principle
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Finally, Liddle' Adam Schiff, the leakin' monster of no control, is now telling Trump it's time toupee the piper
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Axios)
 
 
 
Play-by-play of the Washington Dotards vs. the Beijing Reds as an attempted forced fumble is stopped by an offensive tackle
source: axios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lovely day
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Is Trump subcontracting his tweeting?
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hillsdale Collegian)
 
 
 
Millennial speaks out about his school's use of typewriters, overhead projectors, and microfiche readers
source: hillsdalecollegian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
It may be the same size and shape as a van, but if it's painted blue and yellow, has blue lights on the roof, is full of medical equipment, and has the word "Ambulance" written all over it, it's probably not a van. And no, it's not moving, asshole
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
We're not saying that secret underground Area 51-type bases exist on Mount Everest and are being used by aliens ... but secret underground Area 51-type bases are being used by aliens on Mount Everest (possible nsfw content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Californian)
 
 
 
The dumbest, most horrible article you will read all day
source: dailycal.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HelloGiggles)
 
 
 
Happy National Drink Wine Day. Since you have tomorrow off, do your patriotic duty
source: hellogiggles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
I haven't had Rice Crispy treats in years. What do you make at home when you get a craving for something sweet?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mallard that gives a flying duck
source: hdnicewallpapers.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Tesla Model X is down with O.P.P
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Dog food makers use special ingredient to bring Fido closer to the youth in Asia
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AlterNet)
 
 
 
The latest thing designed to ruin your day? This calculator that will attempt to get you to stop eating meat due to "environmental impact"
source: alternet.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
It may seem like blasphemy to some, but she has a point, you know
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Want to lose weight? Sure, exercise more and eat less is always the best advice, but it turns out being lazy over lunch helps, too. Which explains all those scientists lingering in the cafeteria for hours every day
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
During the Parkland shooting, kids were Tweeting, uploading videos to Snapchat, and taking pictures. It's time we had a serious conversation about kids and cell phone addiction. Yes, really, and from NPR
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
With all the anger, sadness and insanity in the world today, sometimes we need a news story to restore a bit of faith in humanity. "Backyard pirate ship is sanctuary for San Marcos girl fighting leukemia" should do the trick, arrrrrrrrrr
source: sandiegouniontribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Good news Colorado Girl Scouts, now you can sell your cookies to real easy targets without your mom's help in front of marijuana dispensaries
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these stoneheads
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Irish Times)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Strange friends
source: irishtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Homeless man reportedly living amid rubble. It is rumored that it is one of Barney's friends
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Tragically, no. You're not
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Passenger airplane carrying at least 60 people crashes in a mountainous area of Iran (developing story)
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Drunk men were locked together with a mannequin and remote controlled car. Hopelessly locked, mind you
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(JSTOR)
 
 
 
Tired of how everything is politicized these days? Back in Victorian times, they politicized lace
source: daily.jstor.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
"Marijuana facts for teens" PSA pamphlets may well have been written by the folks that brought you "To serve man" and bonus, hip lingo in TFA's headline
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Teen picks winter to explore and get stuck in a wind cave. Wind caves are also known as cold caves "because it's nearly freezing all year," so he's got that going for him
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Woman severely burned as she tries to recreate scene from Cheech and Chong's Next Movie
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Conversation)
 
 
 
The public can exert its authority over the gun lobby--so why doesn't it?
source: theconversation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
Pedo perv retired preacher doesn't get charged with any crimes because the word of one girl isn't enough for a search warrant. Even if that one girl was traumatized when she saw child porn on his phone. In the he said/she said rules of life, he won
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat February 17, 2018
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man marries pineapple. Still better odds than most marriages
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orange County Register)
 
 
 
Honda rear-ended by errant driver who flees...after knocking Honda into path of oncoming Amtrak train
source: ocregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Here's how America's white nationalists trolled the media about the Florida Parkland shooter
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
From My Warm Sticky Hands
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
Weed, mushrooms, and a Taser. Sounds like he was set for the night
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Wales suffers "massive" 4.4 magnitude earthquake, the strongest in 100 years. At least two chairs toppled. Thoughts and prayers for Omarion
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inland Valley Daily Bulletin)
 
 
 
Irish Festival forced to move after city decides it's not worth the green. Fark; they weren't crazy about getting liquor license in name of non-profit Orange Museum
source: dailybulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Thief avoids jail by telling company how he stole 4kg of gold in an afternoon
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this horrific creature
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pensacola News Journal)
 
 
 
Meanwhile Christian high school raffles an AR-15? R U F K M ?
source: pnj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some science guy)
 
 
 
"The ice...it all evaporated; we don't know what happened to it"
source: therockymountaingoat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
Video
 
Savior of the Universe
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
The owner of the gun shop the school shooter used, distraught over "the tremendous sense of responsibility in this situation," closes up business
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Herald)
 
 
 
13 killed, 15 injured after 7.2 earthquake in southern Mexico ... correction ... 13 killed, 15 injured after helicopter falls on them after surviving a 7.2 earthquake in southern Mexico
source: dailyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Great Falls Tribune)
 
 
 
To find out why Montanans dress in layers, visit the little town of Fort Belknap--where temperatures went from -37 to 45 above in one day
source: greatfallstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fruit fighter
source: worldalldetails.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC4i)
 
 
 
Mother has daughter baptized. Father finds out on Facebook. Mother goes to jail?
source: nbc4i.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KJZZ Tempe)
 
 
 
Arizona looking to spend almost $180,000 on signs to tell slow drivers to stay out of the left lane, because no one knows what the word "limit" in speed limit means
source: kjzz.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
RIP Polio, 4000 BC - 2018 AD
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
Subby's hometown doesn't appreciate art, police force artist to destroy work
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMAZ Macon)
 
 
 
"Bloody, drunk and chronically naked" yep, sounds like someone was the highlight of the overnight ER shift
source: 13wmaz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
School District will not comment on student's suicide that they can't say was suicide other than to say that suicide was definitely not the result of bullying
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Finally a robot that subby wouldn't mind having his job taken over by: The beerbot
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Scientists fear the 'Ring of Fire' has been lit because of increased seismic activity over the last few weeks, await the 'Big One' (possible nsfw content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Set)
 
 
 
Photoshop something on this stage
source: magictimestagecraft.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Cowabunga. This Polish crack-cow is an udderly awe-inspiring example of sticking it to da man and a role model for all of her kine
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
I'm not crying, you're crying
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Stay tuned for the newest Olympic sport premiering this Caturday
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Guess which state the Russian bot factory worked on the most
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Alert American Airlines employee saves two teens from being sold into sex slavery
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Florida Man takes a stand
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
"If they want to see the devil, let them"
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Less than 20 minutes. That's all the survivors got before Trump raced off to his golf course
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
A Hawaiian man was killed by local police toda... wait this was in London? Guess it's just a £280 fine
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri February 16, 2018
(The Hill)
 
 
 
He had stars in his eyes and on his shoulders, now not so much
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lowell Sun)
 
 
 
Road rage is dumb. Raging and shooting the other driver is dumber. Bragging about it on Facebook is dumberer
source: lowellsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 6 Birmingham)
 
Weeners
 
Woman arrested for attempting to steal boyfriend's family jewels
source: wbrc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
Drano bombs are the new thing to be scared of apparently
source: wsrz.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Road rage incident ends in the ultimate fail when the offended driver ends up flipping his 4x4
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Florida Fire Chief caught faking two full time jobs. Also faked certifying "first responder" classes that he had faked teaching. Is known to spend considerable time working community outreach at a local establishment which employ mostly single moms
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Dog escapes park, manages to mess up commute for thousands, is still a good boy 13/10 would pet
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Iceland's move to ban circumcision elicits protests from Jewish leaders who say it's an 'attack on Judaism'
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Florida School shooter was on a shooting team sponsored by who? The NRA
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Compassion - it's a good thing
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Tool)
 
 
 
Photoshop this red monkey
source: static-content.cromwell.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Federal Bureau of Investigation)
 
 
 
FBI goes into full CYA mode after Florida shooting
source: fbi.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
NewsFlash
 
7.5 Magnitude quake centered on the Mexican west coast just hit
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gwinnett Daily Post)
 
 
 
A goat in Georgia is available for adoption after three men allegedly force-feed the animal cocaine and whiskey
source: gwinnettdailypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
If you're in the security industry and want a gross of eggs along with your $10/month salary, have I got the job for you
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sum Yung Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this krazy kimono
source: i01.i.aliimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Morning Sun)
 
 
 
If you have some Motion Picture money and you want to pass it off as the real thing where would you try? I bet even the drunkest Farker has a better answer than this guy
source: themorningsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Drunk guy gets in fight at strip club, drives off, runs from cops, avoids the K-9, but can't hide from the police drone
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
If you're wondering what it takes for an extended family of more than 20 to get kicked off a cruise ship, the answers are "Australia" and "massive brawl"
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lowering the Bar)
 
 
 
4-year-old gets to meet his idol at birthday party. Fark: His idol is personal injury lawyer George Sink
source: loweringthebar.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bozeman Daily Chronicle)
 
 
 
Dam judges issue ruling in dam case forcing the dam state to enter dam mediation with the dam irrigators
source: bozemandailychronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Flight diverted after passenger refuses to stop farting
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Because both can shoot your d*ck off: If porn could be banned because it might be a "public-health crisis", maybe AR-15s can too
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Algeria: where the sheep are sheep and the men are nervous
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
NewsFlash
 
Mueller indicts 13 Russians for interfering in 2016 U.S. elections
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Man unlawfully takes father's dead body from French Canadian hospital for proper burial, weekend at béarnaise
source: montreal.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
CA: Legal marijuana vendors, facing black marketers who are selling a competitive product at a lower price, ask law enforcement to get involved. This should end well
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Well that's certainly gonna hurt their TripAdvisor ratings
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Man and his dog succumb to the old "Bengal tiger trap in the park" trick
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Woman who had heart transplant as a girl needs a second one as an adult. Brings same stuffed tiger to both operations for good luck
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Woman who drove two hours to steal six guns from a cabin in order to use them to buy drugs looks pretty happy about it
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Class. I need a few volunteers to help me extract gunpowder for a special project called 'UNDER THE FULL MOON THE SMALL ONES WILL KNOW TERROR"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
TV execs wonder what to do when their crime and safety expert is arrested for soliciting a prostitute
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
4-foot iguana found in laundry room of Florida home, was just looking for his missing sock
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Hungary is fascinated with Poland and its eel-free hovercraft
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(amazon)
 
 
 
Photoshop these chic shades
source: images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Arkansas Hog Farm Fire is the name of my Reverend Horton Heat cover band
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Fears China is rebooting a devastating savory salted nuclear bomb that was dreamt up during the Cold War, not to be confused with regular sweet nuclear bombs
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
"White House refused to release photo of Trump signing bill overturning Obama gun rule." Are 5th graders in charge of our country now?
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Police were called to go out to a specific residence 39 times in a five year period. Guess who lived there. Hint: he claims to have been hearing voices
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Instagramski surrenders
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 Atlanta)
 
 
 
Third-oldest Pearl Harbor survivor is now the second-oldest
source: fox5atlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Accused South Florida school shooter confessed to rampage that killed 17 people. Not brown enough to be called a terrorist
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
Boobies
 
We're happy they are, but here's the science anyway
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Should Congress ban donations from the NRA?
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Don't overload the dumpster at your home that you asked for and try to skip out on the bill ...for you WILL be dumped on
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Let's split the polar vortex, if you know what I mean. And I think you do
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hamilton Journal-News)
 
 
 
Teen arrested for posting "I could beat that number" in reference to the Florida school shooting death toll
source: journal-news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Student eloquence amid tragedy with a challenge and a threat
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
Tide Pods are so 2017. This year has a hot new challenge
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu February 15, 2018
(Politico)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Debtors' prisons. New hotness: Debtors' hospitals
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Today)
 
 
 
For all our Fark epicures, we have new Golden Girls Hot Sauces, including Bea Spicy and Hot Slut. So hot, you're guaranteed not to Blanche
source: today.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Radio host learns quickly that it's a poor idea to broadcast a countdown until gold medal Olympian Chloe Kim turns 18. "She's fine as hell If she was 18, you wouldn't be ashamed to say that she's a little hot piece of a**"
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fredericksburg)
 
 
 
Finally...after 36 convictions and a near lethal amount of PCP in his system....justice
source: fredericksburg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
The C was angry that day, my friends
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Crave Online)
 
 
 
If subby were single I'd go to Tennessee, bail this gal out and take a run at her. THIS is my kind of woman
source: craveonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this majestic ship
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
In a classic case of American exceptionalism, 70 years after Charles Cohen escaped death by hiding in a closet to escape one of the first mass murders in the U.S., his granddaughter hides in a closet to escape a mass murderer and survives. Freedumb
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"I'm going to be a professional school shooter," said school shooter who nobody could have predicted would shoot up a school
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Holland Tunnel needs $364 million overhaul to repair damage from Sandy. Yeah, Sandy was in 2012 -- if it took them six years to figure that out, you probably want to never drive in it again
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
We're sorry but we have to cancel the Pancake Day Race because the ground is wet and muddy and you might fall and hurt yourself
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Delish.com)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Iron Chef edition - Chocolate. Whether you like to use dark, semisweet, white, powders.. Show us your best stuff and sate our chocolate cravings with style
source: delish.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Hey, free sex doll
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Church of England encourages parishioners to give up plastic toothbrushes and floss for Lent. Parishioners: "Give up what, now?"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sweet silver spoon
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DeMilked)
 
 
 
Caption this interrupted meal
source: demilked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Macon Telegraph)
 
 
 
Four hundred C-130 aircraft maintenance crew people leaving Utah for Georgia; IQ's in both states expected to rise as a result
source: macon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ocala Star-Banner)
 
 
 
Mastermind murderer texts detective instead of girlfriend about wife's murder. Guess which state. Go on, you'll never guess
source: ocala.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Again, AOL.com asks the important questions: Are we all doomed?
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
So because of one lady who said "you shall not pass," there was only one mass shooting yesterday
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
Property for sale in Arizona. Bonus: it comes with its own gold mine
source: wsrz.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Alzheimer's can be completely reversed in mice by removing just one enzyme. So now mice suffering from Alzheimer's will totally remember where that cheese is, and all about that cat
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 Las Vegas)
 
 
 
Ahhh tax season. Preparer busted for things like over stating charitable donations, unreimbursed meals and transportation charges...basically what 3 out of 5 of us do every year
source: fox5vegas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Another lawn chair has fallen over in New Hampshire
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man freed after spending three days in the sewer looking for Donatello
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Mysterious pizza stalker bombards lawyer with 100 pies, also some sushi. And he's complaining
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Showing up hammered at your DUI hearing will elicit no sympathy from the bench. (With helpful picture of Thirsty McDrunkerstein.)
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
New Jersey cop who was fired after videos featuring her as a dominatrix surfaced says she wants her job back because she was "just acting"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
I'm not saying this boring old cesspit found at Area 51 is an alien spacecraft, but this boring old cesspit is an alien spacecraft
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Time traveller claims photo proves he went to 2118 on top-secret CIA mission
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Photoshop this support group
source: static01.nyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Meet the 2018 US grocery bagging champion. He'll never put a gallon of milk on top of your bread
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hawaii News Now)
 
 
 
Pastor of mega-church is forced to fly commercial after Customs seizes his 15MM private jet and $350K in cash
source: hawaiinewsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Man admits to giving border patrol car impromptu wash with his "honey wagon"
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Intercept)
 
 
 
Yo Wikileaks, we heard you liked leaks so we leaked your founder's direct messages. Now everybody and his dawg gets to decide whether Julian Assange was an agent of a hostile foreign power or merely a useful idiot
source: theintercept.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Huawei? Stay away
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 667: "Shades of Gray 3". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Twitter tries to keep their business model operational by deleting 200K Russian troll tweets, and demanding others delete them too. NBC does not comply, makes Russian troll database
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Playtime is over as kangaroo breaks the jaw of would be hunter
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Behold Alex Jones' tweet while the school shooting was going on yesterday
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
 
 
The pixels check out
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WXYZ Detroit)
 
 
 
An article about dead cows, with helpful photo of what a cow might look like
source: wxyz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
"Three of the five worst mass shootings in US history have occurred during the Trump era"
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Channel 3000 Madison)
 
 
 
Police investigating mysterious, unexplained injuries to patients in Meriter Hospital's Newborn Intensive Care Unit, which doesn't sound like someone just getting sloppy pinning diapers on
source: channel3000.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
As GOP members offer their "Thoughts & Prayers" to the Florida shooting victims on Twitter, Bess Kalb, writer for Jimmy Kimmel, responds with their received NRA donations in real time
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Burglar tries to throw a brick through a glass door and fails. So does the second burglar, but the first burglar intercepts the brick with his head
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed February 14, 2018
(Politico)
 
 
 
Sarah Sanders wants a big strong man to step up and tell lies for her
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Apparently "butt bouquets" are now a Valentine's Day thing (NSFW)
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A YouTuber who claimed being vegan cured her cancer has died from cancer
source: babe.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Meanwhile, in South Africa
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Post cancer op Julia Louis-Dreyfus is still 10x more gorgeous than you ever were. Fark cancer, indeed
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
In a bid to demonstrate just how progressive they can be, Alabama legislature working to make nitrogen hypoxia an alternative for death penalty proponents
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
You're the President. Do something about it
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Virgin plane that's never been with another plane seeks mile-high romance by drawing a love heart over the UK skies for Valentine's Day (possible nsfw content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
$3,303,355.00
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PetaPixel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this small space in space
source: petapixel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio Alt 102.3 FM)
 
 
 
"Mayor offers bumps for humps"
source: alt1023fm.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
On this Valentine's Day let us salute the guy who dressed in a phony Army general uniform and chartered a helicopter to pick up a gal for an unexpected "secret mission" but then had no idea where to go
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Pharma billionaires whose family company created the opioid epidemic disintegrate into bickering mess. No honor among synthetic heroin dealers
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man claims he's the world's first official cyborg because he has an antenna implanted into his skull. No, it means you're a loon
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Upper Michigan's Source)
 
 
 
Nothing like getting arrested for meth while wearing a D.A.R.E. shirt
source: uppermichiganssource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Ouch: "Guns and survivalists, but no school until I was 17." Cool: Coming from that to getting a doctorate from Cambridge
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Ball of marshmallow fluff? Small low-lying cloud? Some kind of miniature sheep? Whatever it is, it's small, fluffy, white, and has been a very good boy at this year's Westminster Dog Show
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Apple's new HomePod runs circles around the competition. No wait, make that leaves circles
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Driving drunk, rear-ending a car, cursing, kicking one cop in the groin and peeing on another cop is no way to go through life, Mom
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these bathing beauties
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Driver argues that DUI law discriminates against alcoholics. After his 4th DUI. It's a bold strategy, let's see if it pays off for him
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
"Hogzilla" spotted raiding dumpster in Hong Kong. Beijing desperately contacting Tokyo to borrow Mothra and Rodan
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
NewsFlash
 
Reset the cl... you know what, just throw it away
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"Woman who married ghost of 300-year-old pirate reveals their bizarre Valentine's Day plans"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South Jersey Courier-Post)
 
 
 
Why waste money in the museum gift shop when you can just snap a souvenir thumb off a $4.5 million terracotta warrior statue for free?
source: courierpostonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
Ah yes, the old "smuggle cocaine in butt implants" trick
source: wsrz.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
California lawsuit seeks to officially recognize Sasquatch. Plaintiff suggests it will be an easy victory, as long as Chupacabra and the Loch Ness Monster are on the jury
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
"AI generates hilariously weird candy heart messages"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Pierce Brosnan faces a two year jail sentence or be fined 5,000 rupees (£56) for making a commercial for a mouth freshener which has been linked to chewing tobacco. Mildred Krebs all set to bail him out
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Everyone's just showing off
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Man escapes police on foot, then calls 911 on himself because he's stuck in a swamp and it's cold out
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
LOVE returns to Philadelphia, just in time to get greased up like a pole and rocked like a hurricane
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Former officer sues NYPD because the job made him fat and not his daily supply of doughnuts that would make Chris Christie blush
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
This is your captain speaking. If you're the passenger in 28E, your wife would like to announce to the whole plane that she's pregnant again
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Missing inmate found hiding in ceiling of Colorado jail
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Handcuffed man surrounded by police after running into barrier at NSA Headquarters. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to drive in handcuffs?
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Man gets 15 years for bartending
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
This is your Captain speaking: Fear not the gremlin ripping apart our right side plane engine in mid-flight
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Student with no other transportation misses 19 days of school because of late bus. TV station pulls bus GPS records and discovers she's right - and 16 other days are unaccounted for due to a "GPS malfunctioning" status
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
A student managed to snag a photograph of a single trapped atom, giving one of the most stunning scientific photos ever
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this loft bed climber
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Robot dogs open doors, cooperate, don't shed on the couch. Still not welcoming our robotic overlords. It's your Woofday Wetnose Wednesday
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Channel 3000 Madison)
 
 
 
A friendly reminder from the police: When passing horrible car crashes, taking pics of the dead bodies to post online is frowned upon and a bit tacky
source: channel3000.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Someone is sending sex toys anonymously to people via Amazon
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Do You Remember)
 
 
 
Woman lives with 1000 cats and still doesn't have a Fark handle
source: doyouremember.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Christians have a problem with online dating ads on busses in Portland, because they have a problem with everything
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Michigan State keeps the pattern it set with Larry Nassar going
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
The biggest mystery in this neighborhood: How do you accidentally poop in the same cul-de-sac THREE TIMES?
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Worst. Mother. Ever
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Iranian authorities dispute claims that suicide of academic in Tehran prison was 'mysterious,' claim it's perfectly normal for prisoners to sometimes fall down elevator shafts onto bullets
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
This is how much it takes to convict an officer of misconduct
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KUTV Utah)
 
 
 
Low-flying Utah helicopter taken down by high-flying Utah elk
source: kutv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Kos)
 
 
 
Is that sperm in that portrait, or are you just happy to see me?
source: dailykos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Charlie Manson now doing Foreigner tributes
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
In today's episode of WTF: An illegal immigrant called authorities to report a prowler. The responding police arrest him and let the prowler go prowling away
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
That man wandering into traffic and sobbing ... that wouldn't have anything to do with meth, would it?
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue February 13, 2018
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
As if we needed yet another reason to avoid Cracker Barrel
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
A New Jersey police officer was fired due to her prior occupation as a dominatrix where she dished out a different, sexy flavor of brutality
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Clearwater FL in process of becoming a big creepy "Vatican City" for strange people dressed like Jake from State Farm. Xenu pleased to see you come on vacation
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical News Today)
 
 
 
New study shows that alcohol rots your brain, weed does not. Alcoholic Puritans everywhere inconsolable
source: medicalnewstoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Naples Daily News)
 
 
 
Tell me if you've heard this before: A minister, a broadway actor, and a county judge walk into a hotel room. Prostitution sting team asks them what they want. They say the usual
source: naplesnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Malcolm X's letter about Malcolm X's ex is up for sale. It'll cost Xtra because it's X-rated
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"'Catwoman' Jocelyn Wildenstein denies rumors of cosmetic surgery." Wait, so that happened naturally?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Only on Valentine's Day will a headline containing the words "love missile" link to a SFW article
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Daily News)
 
 
 
Homeless guy broke in to watch porn on the computer, but it's all good because he brought his own porn with him
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Just the tips from a banned 300-year-old sex manual
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this painted rock
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fredericksburg)
 
 
 
Desperate woman begs for suicide by cop. Cops surprise the hell out of everyone
source: fredericksburg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
20 women claim leaders within the Mormon church told them to stay with their abusers. Hero tag is for the women coming forward
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Epoch Times)
 
 
 
Woman screams for help as she struggles to escape deadly ball pit. None of the small children who are playing in the same pit lift a finger to help. Heartless jerks
source: theepochtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
A 27-year-old mother arrested for allowing her 27-year-old boyfriend to beat up her 4-year-old. Complete with a "Damn that's a hard 27" mugshot
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Pastor says nothing weird was going on with the bound, naked man in his car
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The new I-66 tolls are a great deal for people whose time is worth over $200 per hour
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rocketnews 24)
 
 
 
Who wouldn't want their spaghetti topped with hamburger patties, bacon, fried eggs, cheese, and potato salad? (pics)
source: en.rocketnews24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
Video
 
You thought the White House daily press briefings were torture? Watch this precious snowflake scream and run amok for 8 hours on a flight from Germany to NJ...you'll never complain again
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DeadState)
 
 
 
Christian College justice: Kiss your same sex partner? That's an expelling. "Haze" your teammate as a group by tackling him, binding him with duct-tape, and sodomizing him while pretending to be a "Muslim goat farker?" That's an 8-page essay
source: deadstate.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
What lessons are today's teenagers learning from online porn? Wait, teenagers are watching porn? Aren't those age verification questions keeping them off the porn sites?
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNSNews)
 
 
 
Do we really want to eliminate the HAND GRENADE competency requirement from basic training?
source: cnsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bathing beauty
source: media2.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
New hotness: butt facials. Wait, it's not what you think
source: wsrz.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Awkward: breaking up with your boyfriend. Really awkward: he's a celebrity. Fark awkward: you get arrested for putting a hidden camera in his place
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2018-02-04 to Sat 2018-02-10
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
"Shut the f--- up!" White powder letter sent to Trump daughter-in-law's NYC home was just four sentences long -- and wasn't very nice
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Space.com)
 
 
 
Researcher submits paper to ten journals studying the effects of Warp 10 on human biology, referencing that Star Trek Voyager episode where Janeway turned into a lizard as its factual basis. Four of them accept it for publication
source: space.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A red-tailed hawk has taken up residence atop Washington's National Cathedral. Now, he just needs a name
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Dozens of Russians believed killed in U.S.-led Syria attack
source: mobile.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
"Sports Illustrated" swimsuit issue reveals that there is no one left here reading this (probably NSFW)
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WREG Memphis)
 
 
 
Elementary school teacher arrested on drug charges hasn't blinked in days
source: wreg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
When girls show their boobies at Mardi Gras, they "don't want itty-bitty beads," said attorney who gives out small plastic toilets
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
This just in: Time traveler from 2030 risks his life to come back and let us know what the future has in store. Bonus: He passed a lie detector test
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
While most gangs and cartels sell drugs, a gang in Pakistan is trading spinal fluids
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Florida Man calls, beats woman's 14 cattle eye worms with pork tapeworm in his eye that wants to eat his brain. Eye worm trifecta in play
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"Blood-covered" man jumps from second-story window, lands on car, goes on "rampage". Finishes up with a rousing "Ta-DAAHHHH"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Ronald McDonald statues get makeovers so they can haunt another generation
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
Mom accused of feeding child hydrochloric acid, chlorine in attempt to cure autism, says a Tide pod chaser will neutralize everything
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Heart condition affects man's memory, causes him to forget wife was 9 months pregnant after he spends 18 days in a medically induced coma. Bonus: Baby was 7 pounds, 11 ounces, and he works at 7-Eleven
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Good idea: If arguing with your partner just keep driving. Bad idea: Pulling the car's emergency brake at 60 mph while arguing
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop these Martians in training
source: cdn2.spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Three words: Singing Furby Organ
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It's like that scene in "Total Recall," but with a woman and a handbag
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Iran accuses the US of using lizards to spy on nuclear facilities
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SecondNexus)
 
 
 
Women flee Him
source: secondnexus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
Looks like we will have a guaranteed supply of Florida Man stories for years to come
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Oregon woman discovers 14 cattle worms in her eyes. She only wishes she died from dysentery
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Civilized)
 
 
 
A new study finds that over 90 percent of elderly people claim their lives were improved by medical marijuana. Soon the wastelands will be threatened by roving gangs of geriatric punks
source: civilized.life   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KQED San Francisco)
 
 
 
California's other drought: a major earthquake is long overdue
source: ww2.kqed.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Author reviews the christian bible, concludes it is poorly written. Evangelical christians react about as you'd expect
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Police respond to man threatening suicide, thwart him as only they can
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Q13 Fox)
 
 
 
In a shocking development, red Camaro driver with the vanity plate "DIRTBAG" falls out of contention for citizen of the year
source: q13fox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Yorker)
 
 
 
Is your child spending too much time talking to fire? You better read this
source: newyorker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
The father who lunged at Larry Nassar during his trial won't be facing any charges
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Woman gets so drunk on a plane she "flirtatiously" strokes stranger's head, throws food, kicks a flight attendant, causes the plane to be diverted, passes out just before landing... and wins every "worst flight" conversation for the rest of her life
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Two more members of powerful Baltimore street gang convicted
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon February 12, 2018
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Teenage girl tries to join ISIS twice and is turned away at customs, settles for going Jihad on local college with a bag of matches. Subby amazed something could hold a teenager's attention for so long
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Twenty-five years of data show that the high hardcore drug holiday known as "4/20" leads to a dramatic rise in car crashes. Tell us again how THC is less harmful than alcohol
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Graphics error blamed for causing a Chicago news station to confuse Pyeongchang and P.F. Chang's
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Oh look, a barn door is open and that looks like a horse running off into the distance. Guess we'd better close it now
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Statter 911)
 
 
 
There's been a change in procedure. When you call 911 in Spartansburg, Pennsylvania, a child rapist will no longer answer your call for help
source: statter911.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Friend shoots at flak jacket but misses, hitting butty in the buddocks
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
We've all had that moment when a 2-year-old just won't shut up about the candy bar he wants in the store's checkout line. It's probably not good form to spank their hand and bottom right there in public, particularly when it's not your own child
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Samoas or Caramel deLites? Tagalongs or Peanut Butter Patties? This helpful map explains it all
source: graphics.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
When 1-year-old toddler gets into parents' morphine pills, father runs out trailer backdoor to hide while mother flees to cheap hotel. So leave it to mother's boyfriend to stay, call 911 to rescue child. (Bonus: Boyfriend is kid's uncle)
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Former KKK leader finds God and now is a security chief at a black church. 'Brother, where there's God's grace, there is no race.'
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop this ice-hole
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
National Gallery unveils official portraits of Barack and Michelle Obama. Barack's is by renowned painter Kehinde Wiley, while Michelle's is apparently by the Peoria Middle-School's 8th-grade art class
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Tonight on Paul's Memory Bank (8PM ET). Cowbell and MORE cowbell : 2 hours of songs featuring the cowbell
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
25-year study: Anthropogenic climate change is real, and it's causing the world's oceans to rise
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
The couple who sold everything they had for a boat only to have it sink 30 miles from shore takes to crowdfunding to raise enough money to make the same mistake again
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
An 84-year-old woman was taken into custody after she fired a gun at children who were being too noisy
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these gators
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
You have to admit, actually telling the truth during a polygraph that you lied and falsified records repeatedly so you can get a better job shows bravery. Stupid, stupid bravery
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The Han Solo movie is polarizing Star Wars fans, who up until now had been a peaceful group of entirely like-minded and rational individuals who'd never before demonstrated a tendency to go apeshiat over inconsequential minutiae
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Crunch)
 
 
 
NOCD gets $1M to help people with OCD. Yes, $1M. *checks again*, $1M
source: techcrunch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
A suspicious letter containing an unknown substance was sent to the Manhattan apartment of Trump's daughter-in-law. Three people were taken to hospital for observation, sources say. Obvious cocaine reference waiting for all-clear update
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBTV 3 Charlotte)
 
 
 
Protip: If you're going camping, you might want to tell someone, lest they get nervous and start putting out missing person alerts
source: wbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Update: The Outback server who was stiffed on $735 order just got PAID. No word on whether she will use money for more tattoos
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Pastor claims teen parishioner had multiple personalities, just had sex with the demonic one
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Meanwhile in Canada, a burglar is invited by the victim for gingersnaps and eggnog
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
So the games are happening, so far so good. Instead of watching yet another tear-jerker interlude about some athlete's struggle to make the team, come take the Fark Weird News Quiz Jan.28-Feb. 3 Olympic Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
In the age-old battle between machete-wielding Florida Man and the police, there can be only one outcome
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Hanford nuclear cleanup site worker tests positive for inhaling plutonium. Man, kids will do anything to get high these days
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Please note: only put clothes and shoes in clothing donation boxes, not homeless people
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Novel 'Doctor Jeckyll/Mr. Hyde' defense based on the effects of medical marijuana collapses into plea bargain, possibly due to the fact that it involved Florida Man taking drugs and turning into Florida Man
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Philippine President Duterte updates KHITBASH to a non-filter-friendly acronym
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Iceland in danger of running out of electricity because: a) people keeping the lights on too long during the winter darkness, b) increased industrial activity, or c) bitcoin mining
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
A bunch of lions leave a message for poachers, narco-kingpin style
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSTU FOX 13)
 
 
 
Man uses empty vodka bottles to break into police department, meditates until cops arrive. "...was making incoherent and strange statements about 'looking for Jesus' and 'nice shoes' while being unable to follow simple instructions"
source: fox13now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Something kids today wouldn't understand
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Missouri bill would mark official day for sliced bread. Wheel, fire unavailable for comment
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Woman suffers from rare condition that causes her to wake up with a British accent. "Everybody only sees or hears Mary Poppins"
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Turnstile jumpers won't be taken to jail anymore in Manhattan, will be forced to spend the entire day on the train instead
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nottingham Post)
 
 
 
Move over stupid couple from Colorado who sold everything to sail the world and sank their ship two days later off California, here's a guy who has sold all his belongings to travel around Europe with his pet ferret
source: nottinghampost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fortune)
 
 
 
Still scared of terrorists? The flu is killing like 9/11 every 5 days
source: fortune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Splinter News)
 
 
 
ICE wants to help stop a 5-year-old boy from worrying about his leukemia diagnosis. So they plan to deport the boy's father so that the kid can worry about that instead
source: splinternews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(From the Grapevine)
 
 
 
The Great Question of our Era: Is it ever okay to use emojis in work correspondence?
source: fromthegrapevine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Massive power outage in Puerto Rico. This isn't a repeat from 2017
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
WWII bomb discovered near London City Airport, all flights cancelled
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Whale dies after washing ashore on beach. If only George Constanza had been there to save it
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Boston Police Department: ALL history matters
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSBW Monterey)
 
 
 
Mail thieves steal 500 cockroaches. If caught, the penalty is 5 years in federal prison. That's a year for every 100 cockroaches, or more than 2 cockroaches a week. And you were told there would be no math. You were told wrong. How many cockroaches?
source: ksbw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Oroville crisis drives harder look at US dams, shows starring Seth MacFarlane
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
In hindsight maybe $116.00 for Tamiflu wasn't too expensive after all
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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