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Sun January 21, 2018
(BBC)
 
 
 
Protesting is a right. Protesting while naked is a choice. Protesting while naked and chaining yourselves to the gates of Auschwitz is 1.1 million kinds of farked up
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
If you're going to donate a can of Campbell Soup to the homeless, make sure it's really soup and not just a can you keep $2,500 in
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Suspected butane honey oil lab leads to home explosion and farkers Googling "Butane honey oil lab"
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Lawyers for Ohio convict who survived lethal injection now pushing for death by firing squad
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Design a flag for a unified Korean winter olympic team to compete under (LGT sample-but-not-required starting image)
source: ak6.picdn.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
John Dickerson to Paul Ryan: Do you agree with the pro-Trump ad that Democrats are complicit in all murders by undocumented immigrants? Ryan: '︿'
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WDRB Louisville)
 
 
 
Former Kentucky police chief allowed to resign in lieu of termination after telling recruit "If they're black, shoot them." But no, don't you dare say cops are anything but heroes
source: wdrb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Republican lawmakers on pot: it's evil and will corrupt children, so should be made ille *Truck full of money from marijuana business owners arrives* I'm sorry, what were we saying?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wicked Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this horses ice
source: cdn-image.travelandleisure.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WOODTV Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
A respected Kalamazoo doctor who has been living in America for 40 years on a permanent green card finds himself in jail after ICE agents raid his home and now plan on deporting him to Poland
source: woodtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
First ever same-sex wedding held at West Point. Thanks, Trump
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Hobby Lobby surrenders an additional 245 artifacts to the government. Jesus Christ unavailable for comment
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Abby someone
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Stop me if you heard this before, there was this teacher, a student and some oral sex. Do we get a tag for this yet?
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Slow news day: Look at all the dogs wearing sweaters in chilly weather
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
"I realize how lucky I am that so much of my sex ed came from Harlequins"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
How can anyone know what it was like for those 13 children held captive by their "parents"? Sadly, one family had already gone through something similar
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
I have no idea what you're talking about, so here's a bunch of T-rexes taking over a public square in Portland, Maine for a party parade
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
After 80 years, the fried muskrat dinner in Lower Alloways Creek, New Jersey is no more. Both Captain and Tennille inconsolable
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Photoshop this hat trick
source: static01.nyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Childhood best friends
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Resident finds ultimate stocking stuffer in back yard
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Paul Bocuse, pain grillé
source: mobile.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Junkee)
 
 
 
Tide pods challenge explained to Aussies. (NSFW~ strong language)
source: junkee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MacRumors)
 
 
 
Duke sucks so much that they managed to get Tim Cook to speak at their graduation
source: macrumors.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Dead-body-by-the-sea
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
So wait, germs made him want to kill a bunch of people?
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tuscaloosa News)
 
 
 
Man is facing a domestic violence charge after a disagreement with his brother over a piece of cheesecake, article provides proper serving suggestions
source: tuscaloosanews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WVVA Beckley)
 
 
 
West Virginia town hit hard by flooding now faces a 33 percent water rate hike. You bet someone has a problem with this
source: wvva.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
"The 13 malnourished children, shackled and chained, were so detached from the outside world they didn't understand the concept of a police officer or medicine ... and now face years of therapy ahead"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
People search for news on Pornhub?
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lex 18)
 
 
 
Judicial marshals and maintenance staff investigate a fowl smell in a courtroom.... Then things get weird
source: lex18.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
War. War never changes
source: amp.businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRTV Great Falls)
 
 
 
Three words you wouldn't expect to hear together: Toddler Roller Derby
source: krtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat January 20, 2018
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Mike Tyson says he plans to get his squandered fortune back selling marijuana, first wants to know where he can buy some cheap
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Whoopsie
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
Tide Pod donuts
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PsyPost)
 
 
 
Spiritual bros at a music festival start tripping balls after scientists give them a fancy-looking 'God Helmet' that really does absolutely nothing
source: psypost.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Got a kid who won't sit still? How about a really heavy outfit? How about a vest made of sand? Comes with cast-iron shorts
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Meet the guy who's lived in a sandcastle for the last 20 years. Sure, he has to rebuild every time it rains, but it's worth it
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bullet
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
How about we celebrate good news for once? World hunger is largely solved, says historian
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
This sounds like some sort of Nazi experiment, except...plot twist
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Bong...Bong...Bong...Aargh
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Look on his works, ye Mighty, and despair
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Today is Buzz Aldrin's 88th birthday today. Let's celebrate by remembering the time he punched a moon landing denier in the face
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
....so a gambler and a Shetland pony walk into a betting shop ....and then things get bizarre
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
(casually casts line) (pause) *snag* Got one (reel...reel...reel) OHSWEETJEEZUSNOPE
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(US Naval Institute)
 
 
 
While North Korea threatens to use nuclear missiles, Canada has unleashed its ultimate weapon to neutralize the U.S. Navy
source: news.usni.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
"Serial Stowaway" is at again but this time doesn't make it far... only from Chicago to London. TSA response: "I'm helping"
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop the belly of the beast
source: 2.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Being drunk, dicking around in the cockpit, and getting arrested is no way to fly a plane, son
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Workers at haggis factory make an offal mistake
source: edinburghnews.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
"Honey, when I'm done and gone from cancer, please don't forget to water the plants in the bathroom" *snerk*
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NASA)
 
 
 
NASA releases more science facts for conservatives to ignore
source: nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
It was slightly breezy at Düsseldorf's airport on Thursday and judging from the video, underwear and barf bag sales were brisk
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Strip bar gets a perfect health inspection. Not a hair to be found anywhere
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
Problem: suspicious package at the post office. Answer: well, shiat
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Have a break, have a cough drop-flavored Kit Kat
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Siberian Times)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cool character
source: siberiantimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Because of the Internet Wayback Machine, a whole generation doesn't realize that Mr. Peabody actually used to take Sherman in the WABAC machine. Now, Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
The world's deadliest cat may just be the cutest thing you will see this Caturday
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
The marijuana industry would really prefer it if you stopped calling their product 'pot' and started calling their product 'cannabis'
source: sandiegouniontribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Just in case you weren't already impressed with the chameleon's ability to change color, it also has glow-in-the-dark bones
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
School in New Mexico is trying to raise money by holding a gun raffle. Not surprisingly, someone has a problem with this
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Turns out Florida police man isn't all that bright either
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
So you can spread the flu by the simple act of breathing
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Labradoodle is a funny name for a life saving dog (or two)
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
I don't always search for tattoos on the internet. But when I do, eyebrows (icky image warning)
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
The sickening psychology of parents who torture their children
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri January 19, 2018
(Scientific American)
 
 
 
Do you want 1918 all over again? Because this is how you get 1918 all over again
source: scientificamerican.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Trump and Republicans decide spiting DACA kids is more important than keeping the government running. McTurtle's vote fails
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
Worst bank robber ever?
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Today)
 
 
 
There'll be trouble when the shampoo hits the hot spring
source: japantoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
It turns out the The Bible is much more engaging to new readers when it's packaged as a novel. Well, that's how people generally expect to get their fiction, isn't it?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
The best way to avoid vaginal atrophy is to have more sex
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Road trips can be a hoot, especially with an owl stuck in the grille. With bonus "Who YOU lookin' at, bub?" picture
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canadian airline troll goes to the Supreme Court for the rights of the person sitting next to you to engulf your armrest with their ass
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some bulb)
 
 
 
Photoshop this integrated LED rear tail/brake/turn signal light for a Kawasaki ZX-14R ZZR1400
source: alexnld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Trump gave Melania a week to lose the baby weight. Has nothing to do with his affair with the porn star 7 months later
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
Woman accused of killing and dismembering her ex-boyfriend now linked to another dismembered dude found 10 years ago. Previous lovers remember her as a real cut-up
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Woman on Chicago train doused with unknown liquid - as opposed to the usual bodily fluids you normally encounter on the Red Line
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tulsa World)
 
 
 
God bless the children. Who react first to their hearts
source: tulsaworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(In Touch Weekly)
 
 
 
"I was like, 'Ugh, here we go.' And we started kissing" (full interview)
source: intouchweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Today's Canadian News is brought to you by a grizzly bear in a truck eating ice cream at a Dairy Queen drive thru
source: calgary.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tulsa World)
 
 
 
Don't follow a cop's every instruction at a traffic stop? That's, at a minimum, a collar for "resisting arrest." Follow a cop's instructions perfectly and immediately? Yeah, you're "over-obeying" and therefore clearly high. Welcome to DWB:Tulsa
source: tulsaworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
Texas Judge tells jury to return a not guilty verdict against woman accused of trafficking a teen girl for sex. Was his reason because A) the prosecutor improperly withheld evidence, B)The evidence against her was legally deficient, or C) God told him to?
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kent Online)
 
 
 
Not really news: Car crashes into road sign and drives off without stopping. Fark: During the opening ceremony of the road's redevelopment
source: kentonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WikiHow)
 
 
 
Today's national popcorn day. Here's how to end national popcorn-between-the-teeth day
source: wikihow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
If you want your child to earn a lot of money, name them this
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man admiring his Vermeer
source: i.ytimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Geez, they'll fire you for any little infraction these days
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda Report)
 
 
 
Russia to dismantle its most powerful submarines. Would make for an interesting group buy
source: pravdareport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Ocean's 14: Macau
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Consumer Reports taste tests store bought frozen pizzas and concludes that, for the tenth year running, the winner is: The boxes they all came in
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Speeding with 245 bags of heroin and a lot of cash makes it easy to bust you, Mr. clean-cut all-American drug runner
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ahram Online)
 
 
 
Turkey, a NATO ally, starts bombing U.S. backed Kurds in Syria. This will surely end well
source: english.ahram.org.eg   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
I'm not sure that AP guidelines cover having ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ in an actual headline, CNN, much less in coverage of a government shutdown
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KJZZ Tempe)
 
 
 
N.S. Sherlock Institute shows that cuts in school funding has led to the Tide Pod-eating generation
source: kjzz.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
Video
 
Cops falls off horse, says 'Oh, sh*t,' looks up to see the Pope helping him back to his feet. Oh, sh*t
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
SHAKING NEWS 6.3-magnitude earthquake strikes in Gulf of California. Scary tag trumps California tag
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPRI Rhode Island)
 
 
 
Thieves in Rhode Island stole an $80,000 camera used to catch speeding drivers. Which is too bad because it would have paid for itself on the first day
source: wpri.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCPO Cincinnati)
 
 
 
After an 84% spike in "issues," flying with comfort turkeys, gliding possums, snakes, spiders and other animals will require a bit more documentation than "I needs him"
source: wcpo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Deer carcasses used to lure, shoot eagles in Klickitat County. You'd think an eagle would be smart enough to avoid Klickitat bait
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cancer.org)
 
 
 
Sad update to Otto's Jacket's thread from November 17, 2017 when he had just been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He passed away a week later
source: cancer.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
Angry Brits mistake Chicago news anchor for racist British member of Parliament: "What I've learned is that Brits are far more creative and colorful with their insults. And no, that's not a challenge"
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Principal: Kids, don't be bullies. Also Principal: LOL let's make fun of this short teacher, everyone
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Milwaukee hotels don't want local bratty kids in their buildings. However, kids from elsewhere are welcome
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
The Arctic is the fastest-warming place on Earth
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WYMT Hazard)
 
 
 
"Hi there, I'll be your spastic excursion ... *hic* ... elastic surgeon ... *hic* ... plastic sturgeon ... *hic* ... face cutter today"
source: wkyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fashionable snek
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
That's not a baguette
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
UK appoints Minister of Loneliness, which raises the question: what's their Fark handle?
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Yellowstone is two million acres of natural resources gone to waste and other views from the oppressed ranchers of Oregon
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSTU FOX 13)
 
 
 
"A movement to end controversial one-on-one interviews between LDS bishops and children is growing in Utah"
source: fox13now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
'Day Zero' is the date when the Cape Town, South Africa reservoirs run dry and it officially runs out of water. As of today, Day Zero is expected to occur on April 22nd
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
 
 
Swedish government sends its citizens a public information manual on preparations for war with Russia, cyber attacks, global warming, da chickey chickey
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
FBI arrest man for trying to extort $1 million from a "squeaky clean" entertainer by falsely claiming a sexual assault during a nude massage. A tale straight from a film noir to the left, speculation as to the last clean celebrity to the right
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
How much do you love sushi? (Read article) Okay, NOW how much do you love sushi?
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
You know your children are not a delicate morons. So why does their school insist on treating them like one when it comes to playground rules?
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Desert Sun)
 
 
 
And you thought the Millennials were the worst part of Coachella
source: desertsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Teenager almost killed by ham and cheese. Fortunately it was cured
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Captain Jack Sparrow volunteers to inspect cargo ship
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Ambulances are in such high demand and low supply in Phoenix that 9-1-1 operators are calling on taxis to take people to hospitals
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Alabama student "feels horrible" about being expelled over her racist social media rants. Stay classy, Alabama
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu January 18, 2018
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Florida Man arrested for DUI after mistaking bank drive-thru for Taco Bell. No word if he tried to order with a two dollar bill
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Eat Sip Trip)
 
 
 
Get crossfaded responsibly
source: eatsiptrip.10best.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
[business cat looks up from newspaper:] "We should have another mortgage crisis"
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
 
 
Man allegedly punches himself in the face to avoid breathalyzer
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
5th grader passes out incredible edibles to classmates that were just too incredible. "I felt like the room was going to flip to the side"
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
The first article you'll read today on the "glandular method of governance"
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Study reveals that L.A. needs more Hollywood sign
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this magical place
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zero Hedge)
 
 
 
Pentagon confirms the existence of a Russian underwater drone that carries a 100-megaton nuclear weapon to wipe out enemy coastlines and leave them uninhabitable for generations
source: zerohedge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Mom who homeschools her daughter doesn't get why she can't ride public school buses around town. "Let's not punish each other because we've decided to educate our children in different ways"
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
In June of 2016, BMW announced it won a contract to supply the Los Angeles Police Department with 100 electric cars - a multi-million-dollar program the chief said "made sense for taxpayers and for the environment." Well, guess what?
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PetsLady)
 
 
 
♪♫ Robbery Raccoon, in search of a Zune, broke into a Knoxville iPhone store ♫♪
source: petslady.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Sorry, but your flight has already left, Buzz. If that is your real name
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Living in a shipping container. New affordable housing: Living in a giant concrete water pipe
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Nothing to see here citizen. Ignore the NYPD raiding the offices of Newsweek
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
♫ Who's blowing through the streets of the city / Knocking down everybody she sees / Who's rippin' off the roofs of the buildings / Everyone knows it's Windy ♫
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop Tennis Match: A day at the beach
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(Time)
 
 
 
Florida has a new high-speed rail line called Brightline that just started service. So far, four people have been struck and killed by the train. Death Row Rails?
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stoke Sentinel)
 
 
 
The B'oatcake is back floating and chugging along North Staffordshire's waterways after donations paid for it to be repaired
source: stokesentinel.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stoke Sentinel)
 
 
 
The Nanny State considers cutting back on 24-hour drinking at airports so there would be no more refreshing pints available at 4 in the morning
source: stokesentinel.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Here's your annual "The majority of Americans are good and truly farked in the event of a minor financial emergency" article. Sleep tight
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Dozens audition for role of lifetime as Weeki Wachee mermaids. "It's just a dream come true if I get it"
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Krispy Kreme is asking fans to choose new doughnut flavor. OK FARK. You know what to do. Article on the left, your sick, disgusting, snotty comments on the right
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(13 ABC Toledo)
 
 
 
Giant Meteor continues its election campaign in the Midwest with a second fireball in the sky last night. Bruce Willis reportedly seen headed to Cape Canaveral
source: 13abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
I have no idea what you're talking about so here's a deer that has a chicken feeder stuck around its neck
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Traffic wardens overlooked $19,000 of parking tickets for two years of free pizza. So, pro-tip?
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
We can confirm the missile attack alert was a false alarm. You may now fap in complete safety
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
After minutes of searching, drone locates two people in the middle of nowhere and unleashes an unholy barrage of flotation device to save their lives
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Marijuana is not a substitute for money when buying pizza. Who knew?
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
"Honey, lets get married today." "But we're on a plane. How can we possibly make that happen?" Pope Francis: "Ahem"
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Finally, a chest of drawers big enough for Farkers to keep their ratty old underwear in. And it's for sale
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Toronto Board of Health to hold public hearings on the dangers of nuclear weapons and radiation fallout. How's it glowing, eh?
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talk Radio (UK))
 
 
 
A wolf is on the loose near London after escaping its sanctuary. Sources cited by Fark say it sneakily wore a sheepskin jacket to trick the people on the gate
source: talkradio.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
New VA hospital in Colorado will serve fewer patients, have fewer beds and no PTSD treatment center, despite being twice the square footage of the old one. Fail tag passed away in the waiting room, so Asinine tag fills in
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
200,000 honey bees killed when 100 hives doused with diesel fuel. Talk about a buzzkill
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
750kg of cocaine found hidden in pineapples. Police describe the suspect as wide-eyed and square pantsed
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wicked Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this holy orb
source: i.pinimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Lions and tigers and mares, oh my (warning: disturbing images)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Not all millionaires are bad, some are also deranged for hiring strippers for their son's 12th birthday party
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Today in obvious news: Most dog owners would rather hang out with their pet because they are less stressful than stupid people
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Russian urban climber found dead and turned unto failcicle on side of building (possible nsfw content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WEAU Eau Claire)
 
 
 
A man shoots at cops with a BB gun, cops don't shoot back. Can you guess why?
source: weau.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio 1190 KEX)
 
 
 
IRS warns of W-2 form scams that are worse scams than the W-2 forms
source: 1190kex.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Trump's announcement of the winners of Fake News Awards goes as smoothly as everything else his administration does
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Almost there, almost there, almost there... oh shiat
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Haven Independent)
 
 
 
But detectives had him in handcuffs within hours after discovering the note he left at the bank was written on the back of his girlfriend's pay stub
source: valley.newhavenindependent.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Cannabist)
 
 
 
Study points to way to improve home prices. Is it A) Better schools B) Better infrastructure or C) Marijuana dispensaries
source: thecannabist.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The terror group responsible for the most extremist murders in 2017? White supremacists
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
A president, such as President Trump, who cannot take criticism, "who must constantly deflect and distort and distract - who must find someone else to blame - is charting a very dangerous path"
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Gay couple orders programs for their wedding. Receives pamphlets on Satan instead. I guess that's a type of progress
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
The sexual superbug you've never heard of, and since you're on Fark, will never have a chance to catch either
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Where would be the best place to hide 52 Bison?
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 663: "Pink 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed January 17, 2018
(Metro)
 
 
 
Honestly, what kind of cretin steals 1,000 tins of spaghetti hoops from a food bank?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
Boobies
 
Fort Collins, CO has been engaged in a desperate battle for years. Finally, its drive to keep women's tops on goes to 10th Circuit Court of Appeals
source: denver.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
The latest everyday item that is making you sick: receipts
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Speed camera placed at strategic work zone on the Capital Beltway produces almost 75,000 tickets and $3 million of safety during the last six months of 2017
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Drunk droning now illegal in New Jersey. Bagpiping under the influence still legal
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The parents of the 13 kids kept locked up lived in two houses in the Fort Worth area of Texas before heading west. The current owners of those houses found scratch marks on doors, carpets caked in filth and closets "converted into cages"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man arrested for having 'unnatural sex' with three cows. So does that mean that there is such a thing as 'natural sex' with a cow?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
What kind of shiathole 3rd-world country takes 4 months to get the power back on?
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time (Images))
 
 
 
Photoshop these beautiful buds
source: timedotcom.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
US Border Patrol agents routinely destroy water jugs, humanitarian supplies left for illegal immigrants crossing deserts, like, so they can die
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Look out... Look OUT... LOOK OUT!
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Tapir)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby Malayan tapir born in Minnesota Zoo. Who am I kidding, it's adorable
source: mnzoo.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(East Idaho News)
 
 
 
Family discovers hidden room after sinkhole opens in garage. Pennywise unavailable for comment
source: eastidahonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
If you're living so well that you don't notice your assistant stole $1.2 million of your wine, then good for you
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Treatment)
 
 
 
Photoshop this spa session
source: plesnik.si   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Having studiously crunched the numbers, Church of Satan arrives at the conclusion that only Sex Robots are capable of saving society
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Straits Times)
 
 
 
Chinese youth falling prey to dangerous mew drug. "As a veteran sniffer, if I don't get my fix I feel absolutely terrible. I have a serious addiction"
source: straitstimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
If you're kicked off a train by the police, don't try to jump back on when it starts moving again. Especially if you're about 50 pounds overweight
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ledger-Enquirer)
 
 
 
Morons perplexed as to why cars don't drive up icy hills. Maybe they should have bought those snow tires after all (with exciting video)
source: ledger-enquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
'It's a log / It's a log / It's round, it's happy it's woOMG FLYING THROUGH MY WINDSHIELD
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Straits Times)
 
 
 
Police were in hop pursuit
source: straitstimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Price of beer going up this spring O DEAR GOD, DOGS AND CATS LIVING TOGETHER MASS HYSTERIA
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
This Florida Woman filmed her neighbors with camera. And this Florida Woman ran same neighbors off the road. And THIS Florida Woman cried "I'll fark you all up anytime" at her neighbors when at home
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Llouts lleave llamas llacking llids. Llocals llament lloss
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Russians laugh at Americans and their "cold" weather
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Part of I-78 in NJ is now the cleanest stretch of highway in the country
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Outside Online)
 
 
 
Cyclists are more law-abiding than motorists. More smug, too
source: outsideonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Magazine)
 
 
 
European Parliament bans electric fishing even though it's safer to environment. Fishermen can't believe results, not sure if they're being trawled
source: sciencemag.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
My hovercraft is full of eels. Sorry, my English is bad. That should be "mall restroom"
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
She got better
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
Illinois governor's office clarifies that their boss does believe a former KKK leader is a racist
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"A 'potentially hazardous' monster asteroid the size of Hyde Park is heading towards Earth at 67,000mph." That's roughly 45 RPM...or 45 Rhode Islands per minute
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Walmart offers way to turn leftover opioids into useless gel. But who has leftover opioids?
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Hawaii's Emergency Management Agency insists an employee pushed the wrong button and they weren't hacked. But then there's this news photo showing the system's password written on a sticky note. Can't we just go back to blaming Trump?
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this rear wheel
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Researcher says your dog wants steak. Difficulty: prairie dogs. Enjoy your Woofday Wednesday
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Can you pass the test President Trump had to take to prove his mental health is not deteriorating?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Actually, America doesn't need any Norwegian immigrants because for starters, they're just too good looking
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AccuWeather)
 
 
 
If you're planning on traveling to a southern state tonight, don't
source: accuweather.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
Famous Bayeux Tapestry 'to be loaned to Britain for first time' from France to show Brits how they got their arses handed to them by the Normans after the Battle of Hastings in 1066
source: standard.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Some Carillion directors will continue to draw a salary for most of 2018, while 5,000 small businesses are likely to go under in the wake of the giant's collapse
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
What barks like a dog, has no legs and runs on tracks? Difficulty: Japan
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Twenty-seven years ago today, and only seventeen days into the 1990s, the First Gulf War (aka Desert Storm), began, after the entire 1980s passed without a single boot on the ground in combat
source: en.m.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRTV Great Falls)
 
 
 
This is either a story about: 1) a very clever criminal or 2) the deputies who didn't check her butt cheeks closely enough
source: krtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio Alt 102.3 FM)
 
 
 
Fake buttocks injection doctor's reign of terror comes to an end in prison
source: alt1023fm.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Did you vote Giant Meteor 2017? Apparently its first act was to try to wipe out Detroit
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Mother of children found shackled to their beds and starving was "perplexed" as to why the cops were there
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Department of Justice wants to start arresting state and local elected officials. Let that sink in
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bozeman Daily Chronicle)
 
 
 
Dean Wormer puts his foot down
source: bozemandailychronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Sanctuary city concept dealt a blow
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Former CIA Officer, accused of supplying China with information that led to the arrest or execution of 20 American agents, arrested flying into New York
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Man takes his wife's surname when they get married. Naturally, people think he should kill himself for this
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Moscow's 2017 December was 'darkest' on record. Look, you guys chose this timeline, don't come whining to us
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue January 16, 2018
(NPR)
 
 
 
Captain, since you were asleep in your bed at 2 AM when you were almost killed we decided to go ahead and charge you with negligent homicide
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Cops protect infants with "Invisible Cloak" made out of the Emperor's new clothes
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WOWT Omaha)
 
 
 
Counterfeit money used to buy winning lottery ticket. Bonus: Not Florida
source: wowt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
Attorney on Nixon's enemies list says his journalist wife wants a Trump fake news award
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
VA won't study effects of medical marijuana on veterans leaving it up to veterans to conduct self testing
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Amarillo Globe-News)
 
 
 
Pointing a BB-gun at someone while robbing a pizza joint in Texas goes as expected
source: amarillo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Sure, he abandoned his girlfriend to die after crashing their car into an icy river - but at least he asked bystanders to help her before he ran off
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: An update to the Google hullabaloo
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It is with a very heavy heart that I have to inform you all that gremlin1 - who was an active and very much loved member of the Caturday family - has crossed the bridge ☹
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washingtonian)
 
 
 
Axe-throwing divorce parties are a thing
source: washingtonian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Kazakhstan is switching from the Cyrillic alphabet to the Latin alphabet, in a bid to underscore independence from Russia and simplify language learning. Very nice
source: kazakh-tv.kz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Alaska says their emergency system won't issue false alarms like Hawaii, because by the time workers have manually typed in a warning, remembered the password, clicked multiple buttons, and typed a confirmation, the missiles will have already hit
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KERO 23 Bakersfield)
 
 
 
Pro Tip: Don't steal cars. But if you do steal a car and there is a dead guy in the front seat, either ditch the body or steal a different car before driving through a police checkpoint
source: turnto23.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wicked Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this thing that Hell Met
source: img-new.cgtrader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Danish inventor accused of having sex of a "particularly dangerous nature" aboard his submarine, also murder, dismemberment and indecent handling of a corpse
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. But teach a man how to grow a fish using heat generated from Bitcoin mining and he eats until the Bitcoin bubble bursts
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Man takes explicit pics of woman he's dating to later blackmail her, sends them to the preschool where she works, lets his identifying tattoos get caught in the images
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Totally Not Stoned Guy)
 
 
 
Apparently, sightings of flying dinosaurs are on the rise in NC, even though recreational marijuana use is still illegal. (with pic of what a flying dinosaur over NC might look like)
source: charlottestories.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Richard the pony is finally getting a new richard
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Baking relative supports family with rare form of diabetes. Boiling a relative considered not as effective
source: calgary.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Magazine)
 
 
 
People in Billerica are upset at the word "douchebag" despite living in a state full of them
source: bostonmagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Your body is throttled and contorts at such breakneck speed when you sneeze, it's kind of like having an orgasm while being in a car accident at the same time
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
California declares independence from California
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikia)
 
 
 
As of 2018, Greedo has shot first longer than Han shot first
source: starwars.wikia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Porn star says she did have year of sex with Trump although collectively only about ten minutes
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox2 Detroit)
 
 
 
Man calls 911 to report armed gunmen, but when police find him bloody and dead woman wrapped in plastic, they decide his claim was cheap and easy to see through
source: fox2detroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
It takes a certain set of nads to steal a hundred pot plants from the police at a guarded crime scene
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Controversial cannabis sex party is the name of my Cypress Hill tribute band
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Well, Johnny, how was school today? OK, I guess. Tommy farted in homeroom, and we had pizza for lunch, then the cops came in and shot up the armed robber, so can you come an pick me up early?
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wicked Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this free image.. don't screw it up
source: wallscover.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Bonnie and Wide the Walmart bandits turn themselves in, and are 'deeply sorry'
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Woman complains to social media when restaurant enforces ban on outside food
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Why did Disney chuck the Star Wars Expanded Universe into the trash bin? The bastards killed Chewie
source: io9.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Caption this photographer and his friend
source: cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox Business)
 
 
 
"Nobody expects to find a Rembrandt sitting under the ping-pong table in the basement." Of course, Rembrandt's chief weapon is surprise
source: foxbusiness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
North Korean expert suggests we bomb Kim Jong-un's toilet. Others warn this may launch a new arms race we could lose, considering the relative effectiveness of weapons grade Taco Bell versus Kimchi
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Llama fetuses, owl feathers and dried frogs: Inside the witches' market in Bolivia
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(We Are Central PA)
 
 
 
I-80 in central Pennsyltucky is all Road Warrior and shut down and stuff. Watch out for the other guy out there
source: wearecentralpa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Nope vs. Nope
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Today in "What Could Go Wrong?" Someone creates a "legally-binding" sexual consent app
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Trump did that umbrella thing again
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
Religious man visiting Jerusalem suffers delusions and is now wandering the desert, a thing so common it has a name: Jerusalem Syndrome
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
I submitted this earlier, but clicked the wrong link
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Isn't this how WW1 started?
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
Bunny Ranch brothel hoping to accept bitcoin payments for sexual services. Come one, come all
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 61 Connecticut)
 
 
 
If you're tired of your dog shedding all over the house or just want to shame the poor creature for existing: Dog leotards
source: fox61.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Old man with cane goes full waffle house on cops in a Dairy Queen
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
Rookie police officer saves toddler's life on his first day on the job
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Crappy Denver to Hawaii flight forced to turn around in middle of the Pacific because the toilets were all full
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
New strap-on modules expected to bring Littoral Combat Ship to peak performance, and will bring it to the climax of its abilities. Critics still think it will get reamed
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Media: "What is it that they've sent us regarding the Russian probe?" House Committee: "Hope"
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
Some airline passengers will go to great lengths to avoid excess baggage fees, but wearing ALL of your clothes will get you barred from most flights
source: standard.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wicked Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Family Tree
source: hopedealer2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
"10 workers dead after bridge unexpectedly collapses." So bridges are expected to collapse now?
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Poison, poison...tasty fish
source: amp.theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
There it is. The stupidest headline you will read all day
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Japan does its best Hawaiian impression, issues ballistic missile alert
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
What Would Jesus Do? Stab a neighbour then punch him in the face, apparently
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Woodward killed Bernstein because he was getting too close to deep throat
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Thanks to on-board GPS and other car-based monitoring systems, your car company probably knows more about you than your spouse. And no, they're not interested in a three-way with that hot bartender, either
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
I am William H. Gates III, founder of Microsoft. Now that Nigeria's vaccination program has achieved zero new cases of polio in 2017, I am willing to transfer the total amount of $76,000,000 (seventy-six million) dollars to the Bank of Japan
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Since 2001, seventy-five women have been strangled or smothered in Chicago, and the majority of their killers have gotten away with it
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Oh great, now I feel even worse
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Shiathole sends Donnie a blast of karma
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon January 15, 2018
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Another virgin is selling off her virginity to bankroll her college education and buy her parents a house (possible nsfw content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Woman orders hit on romantic interest's partner, gets Florida-quality results
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Do You Remember)
 
 
 
It turns out Steve McQueen's iconic Mustang from the movie 'Bullitt' is alive, well, and has been living in a New Jersey garage for the last few decades
source: doyouremember.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
A Christian group at University of Iowa rejects a gay member's bid for vice-president. Ultra Fark: Then sues the school for discrimination when their group is shut down
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
A cautionary tale: Don't try to hold back a sneeze
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
A special place in hell awaits: Parents charged after 13 abused siblings rescued from California house after 17-year-old girl escapes
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Jail says they "forgot" confidential inmate-lawyer meetings were being recorded for the last 4 years
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Is it too much to ask that you potheads in Oregon to stop growing so much marijuana? You're harshing the buzz of other states that want to let people grow their own
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
When your kids are legally adopted by another couple, just let them go, dude
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this surfer
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Woman dies after getting hit by a stray bullet in the Arizona desert. And since it happened in Arizona, police have no idea who pulled the trigger because there were literally hundreds of people in the desert randomly firing their guns
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
On Paul's Memory Bank tonight (8PM ET) more oldies.....from 1960 and 1961. Only took a little more than 3 years to cover 1955 through 1989
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Army vet sues VA over scalpel left in body after surgery. VA plans counter-suit for theft and unauthorized possession of government property
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Nazi begs for his freedom. Ironic tag stares down its nose at him in silent fury
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
If your 6-year-old gets scratched by a sick bat take him to the emergency room ASAP. Even if he does he cry when he's told he would get shots
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Triple Dog Dare goes horribly wrong
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Over 1000 kids charged with distributing explicit material by sharing video clip on social media of two 15-year-olds having sex in very conservative state of ... Denmark?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Police report many loaves and fish were confiscated
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
The most Walmart crime of the year goes to the two stealing a credit card at a Pa. Walmart, then scurrying away on scooters (With Meme-worthy Pic)
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Want proof that Guinness was started by Farkers? Look no further than the company's Managing Director Hugh Beaver, who founded the now-famous Book of Records to settle bar arguments
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
Get on cruise ship, aware it is heading into "bomb cyclone". Experience "bomb cyclone" on cruise ship. Whine online about unpleasant "bomb cyclone' experience on cruise ship. Demand refund. Whine online about how unfair the cruise line is
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
A well-known NC pastor and his wife tested their faith... against a train
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Ivana Trump says ex-husband is not racist, merely confused. "And sometimes he says silly things"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Have you no shame, Colonel? Have you no decency?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this puppy sculpture
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
School superintendent resigns over inappropriate relationship. On the one hand, the student had graduated from HS by the time it got physical. On the other hand, the dude totally has a porn name
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
*collective male wince*
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PJ Media)
 
 
 
And the state with the highest poverty rate is....California
source: pjmedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Driver of a company that contracts for Amazon is robbed of his delivery van and 62 parcels so of course he is responsible for damages to the van and the stolen items
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Yes, it is a crime to share your opioid stash with a friend, causing him to overdose and die. Yet some people are outraged at this
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
RIP Dolores O'Riordan. What was your favorite Cranberries song?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Police asking for help identifying masked suspect believed to have robbed Boost Mobile store of thousands of dollars. With 27 8x10 color glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back to help catch thief
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTMJ)
 
 
 
Semi driver mashes truck loaded with potatoes under low-height bridge; driver knishes he hadn't scone this way. Gnocchi, I'll stop roasting now
source: wtmj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Caption this awesome otter
source: img00.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Interesting facts you may not have known about Martin Luther King, Jr., which may or may not include that his shirts never wrinkled, his blood smelled like cologne, his hands felt like rich brown suede, and that you could see his charisma from space
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
When figuring out that you've had too much to drink and shouldn't be driving, it's best to pull over and sleep it off. Just not at the Holland Tunnel blocking traffic
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
There's actually a scale that exists that can measure a man's likelihood to sexually harass someone, but judging by the illustration used in TFA it only works on giants
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
20 arrested after a fight broke out over a missing iPhone at John's Incredible Pizza. Fark: nobody checked the lost & found
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
States that have legalised the evil weed now reap what they sow with their evil crop: violent crime and murder are way down in all of them
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
In most of the country, it's MLK Day, but in Alabama and Mississippi...Happy Stigginit Day, everybody
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this rocky road
source: s.w-x.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Guy outraged by his stepdaughter's ability to grow up decides to teach her a lesson by photoshopping her head onto women he was having sex with. That'll teach her. Oh, by the way, he's going to jail (NSFW)
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Apparently farting at the gym keeps the sweaty dudes from hitting on you (page might be NSFW)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJAC TV Johnstown)
 
 
 
Pennsyltucky Baptist church decides that the day before MLK's birthday is the most appropriate time to hold a special service thanking their community's civil servants
source: wjactv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Two European breeds added to the AKC registry. In related news: American dog lovers trying to figure out how to pronounce Nederlandse kooikerhondje
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
"The American civil-rights movement began in 1951, in Brevard County, with the assassination of Harry and Harriet Moore on Christmas Day"
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." --Martin Luther King, Jr
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
In other news, women in Sri Lanka have been dry since 1955
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The key to a happy and sustained marriage is proper planning of that nasty hot make up sex
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kent Online)
 
 
 
54-year-old UKIP leader dumps 25-year-old racist former glamour model after racist tweets about Meghan Markle went public
source: kentonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
"If my dog doesn't have to wear pants, why should I?"
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook