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| Sun December 31, 2017 |
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Legal marijuana will irrevocably change California in 2018--presumably for the worse
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The face that launched a thousand slips lets go of another one. Don't you ever change, Prince Philip
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Photoshop this DC street
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Increase your drinking quota? Decrease your fapping quota? What do YOU hope to accomplish this year? It's your official New Years resolutions thread
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Of all the things to see at the Newark airport, a grown man giving a massage to a 13 year-old boy and then handing him money and a thank-you card has to be one of the weirdest
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Ice balls. Not only a description of subby's genitalia, but also a meteorological condition on Lake Michigan
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The Powerball Jackpot tax on the stupid jumps to $440 million
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Bad: Have $200k boat stolen from your marina. Good: Track down the thief. Bad: Turns out he's not the thief. Fark: After you murdered him in an abandoned lumber yard
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| (Someplace) |
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Photoshop this oasis
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Drunk, stupid, and holed up in a hotel with an AR-15, shotgun, handgun, and troves of ammunition above an outdoor New Year's Eve celebration is no way to go through life, son
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It's officially Happy New Year 2018 in New Zealand and let's check in to see...wow are they ALL Farkers over there?
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Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam....Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam....Lovely Spam, Wonderful Spam
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We lost a bright, funny and amazing TFette earlier this week. RIP brightestfell (Garnet Cat on Facebook & Twitter)
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Fight the flu. Do yoga
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Baltimore implements new definition of "community policing"
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Experts discuss why it's so hard to cure your hangover, drunkie
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Worst Korean Navy prevents second oil tanker from violating Best Korean embargo this past week. Panamanian-flagged vessel was crewed primarily by Chinese, just in case you're keeping track
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If it wasn't for UNESCO you'd never know about Belgium's horseback shrimp fishing, Romania's lad dances, or the hopping procession of Luxembourg
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In 2018 get ready for more mushrooms, more canned seafood, and more Japanese breakfasts. But you can wash it all down with more hard cider
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Move along folks, nothing to see here
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Can you guess why police stopped this car?
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Multiple deputies down in active shooter situation in Denver suburb
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Fake news, unpack, drill down, and more have all been banned because they are used too much by annoying people. They are part of the 43rd annual list of words and phrases that shouldn't be part of polite society
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| (Some Guy) |
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It's a bit cold for BIE
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Woman carries her heart on her sleeve in order to stay alive. I'm sorry, I meant, carries her heart in her backpack
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| (Some Guy) |
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Photoshop this odd dwelling
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CSB Sunday Morning: Last day
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It's official - In some parts of the United States, it's actually colder than it is on Mars
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As the gay lifestyle becomes more and more accepted and mainstream, what's going to happen to America's gay bars?
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Family removed from flight after someone accused them of having head lice
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Lady caught on video being super racist, then makes up a bunch of excuses as to why you shouldn't trust your lying eyes
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Another shooting in Las Vegas is just another isolated incident
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Protests turn violent in Iran, resulting in two deaths. No word when Trump will remind us there are good people on both sides
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California could make more money from THC than beer
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Nepal bans Everest climbers who were really just Everest passengers being carried up by Sherpas
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Time for another "pickle incident" as Dillsburg, Pa cancels their New Year's pickle drop. It is just too cold to whip out the old pickle in Pennsylvania this year
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Little kid has apparently been playing too much GTA
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Lawyer saves two boys who fell though thin ice. He had to act quickly and lost a few billable hours
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Is this the most whipped man in Oklahoma, the USA, the World?
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Bride battling breast cancer says 'I do' 18 hours before her death
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Creepy guy in the gym locker room is broadening his horizons
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Your family not getting sickened fast enough with raw milk? Untreated water is here to help
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| Sat December 30, 2017 |
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We've all seen this movie, and it doesn't end well
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"Waiter, what are these elk doing in my ice water?" "Looks like the backstroke, sir"
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Photos of frozen Niagara Falls emerge as tourists brave sub-zero temperatures
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Have you noticed how America is falling behind other countries? Let us count the ways
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Vegas weak
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Photoshop this spiral staircase
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Police find 110 bags of crack inside man's intestines. Won't somebody please think of the chitlins?
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It looks like California beaches are a great place to nope this time of year (ouchy image warning)
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Bad: Being stuck in Bangkok airport for two hours. Mega bad: Being stuck in Bangkok airport for two months
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"Prankster" whose SWATting resulted in police shooting has made bomb threats before
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Photoshop this mailman
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New Year's Eve in Times Square is a urine-soaked hell, so get there early
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South Carolina lottery is kinda, sorta, possibly thinking about maybe warming up to the idea they need to pay out their winning tickets
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Whatever grandma, if you must have a good painkiller, sprinkling cannabis on cheese toast doesn't sound so bad
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In other news, half of Puerto Rico is still without power three months after Hurricane Maria
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| (The Insider) |
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We taste-tested these various flavored high fructose corn syrup concoctions so you didn't have to. You're welcome
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Sixth-grade teacher appeals firing after parents complained to police he showed students pornography ... or rather, classical Impressionist, Rococo nudes
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Gamer whose "swatting" call led to an innocent man's death arrested in Los Angeles where he "had been living at a transitional recovery center." Hopefully he'll get to spend many years in a transitional recovery cell block
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Broke man who sold a blanket for $1.5 million apparently needs to learn to manage his money
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Dear United States: We need to talk about your drinking problem
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| (Some Guys) |
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Photoshop this appraisal
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Police finally track down that Nigerian prince that needs your help moving $25 million
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Turkey: where pampered cats are top dog on Caturday
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A horse is a horse, of course, of course, unless you lose custody through divorce, and you give up, your horse, by force, to the former spouse you wed
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Beep beep beep I'm a car. Fark you, I'm a bus. I'm a TRAAAAIN, suck my diiiiick
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From the "You Can't Make This Sh*t Up" Department: Swiss lawmaker blames gay suicide on weakened anal muscles
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The President of the United States was just corrected on global warming by a member of Jersey Shore and shiat like that
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Want to drive drunk? Move to Alberta
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Okay, how bad did you fark up when the Alabama Secretary of State laughs at your dumbass claims?
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Here is an update from the charming mother of 15 who demanded "somebody has to pay" a few years back. She has been blessed with 2 more children and has something to say
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Facing an economic crisis because you've decided to leave the EU? A shiny new Royal Yacht should fix that right up
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FBI conducting a raid in Sterling Virginia
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| Fri December 29, 2017 |
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They triiiiiied to kill him with a plane wing... uh-oh
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These cheese-making buffalos get massages and listen to Mozart. Do you think this royal treatment makes the cheese any better?
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It's really cold outside. How cold is it? A dog froze to death. Some sharks died. And a man at a bus stop froze to death
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Truck carrying trail mix wrecks on highway. Police searching for a good raisin, haven't ruled out nuts
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"Exonerated Tennessee man seeks $1 million after being wrongly jailed for 31 years"
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Turns out a 3-year-old started the Bronx fire by playing with the stove. Man, that's going to be one long timeout
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Mother of five and her "best friend" agree to split winning lottery ticket. Days later, mother of five sees "best friend" in press with $300,000 lotto check. Mother of five needs new best friend
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Dylan prepares to bring Britain to its knees with heavy snow, giant hailstones, 70mph gales, obscure references
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Photoshop this Kokoschka
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It's hard to take news reporting seriously when there are T-rexes frolicking in the background
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Some days you feel like a superhero, then there are days when you try to hurdle the gates in the London Underground and get your penis stuck in the barriers
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Thai man arrives home seven months after being 'declared dead and cremated'. Well that made for one awkward Christmas
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Driver finds a suitcase filled with human bones in woods on the side of a remote Georgia road, is initially reluctant to report it because, hey, free bones and a suitcase
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Police investigate massive brawl at Waffle House. This is not a repeat of every other Waffle House story ever
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Anonymous letter: "[E]xtremely disrespectful, rude, selfish not to decorate a house ... for the holidays." Home owner: My mom always helped decorate our house for the holidays, but she just died from cancer
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Trendy expensive $7 per-slice bacon is now trendy because it's expensive
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Man poses for picture of himself with stacks of cash, minutes later the inevitable happens
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| (Farkin 2017) |
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Iron Photoshop Challenge: Help Steven Seagal out with a better cover for his new book- The Way Of The Shadow Wolves: The Deep State And The Hijacking Of America
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4-year-old girl gets served a real drink instead of a 'mocktail' and ends up with a hangover. Okay, lets come up with her future Fark handle
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Gamer threatens to send cops to other gamer's house over a bet. Second gamer gives wrong address. Cops arrive and shoot a non-gamer
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As God is my witness, I thought iguanas could fly
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Stealing copper wire can be an electrifying experience
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There can be only one
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Dave Barry asks the most important question of 2017: Did that really happen?
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Florida man rigs his door to electrocute his pregnant wife and changes his Facebook status to "widowed" before anything happens to her. Shockingly, his cunning plan fails
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Website claims best sub sandwiches are made by a grocery store. Author obviously hasn't ever eaten a sub sandwich elsewhere
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A picture is worth a thousand lies
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Police: Please don't celebrate New Year's by randomly shooting at the sky
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Bartenders reveal the drinks you should never order at a bar. Oddly enough, a beer is number 7
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President Donald Trump appeared to know little, if anything, about international trade deals during an exchange with German Chancellor Angela Merkel in March this year. White House officials reportedly characterized the talk as "humiliating"
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If you blow yourself up cooking homemade fireworks where you can buy legal fireworks, you might be from Alabama
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Snowy owl escapes prison
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9-year-old boy with a BB gun stops a man from stealing his dad's truck. Case not likely to end up in a pellet court
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Photoshop this rope levitation trick
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United Airlines: "We drag passengers off our planes." Alaska Air: "Hold my beer and mukluks"
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It's 31 below zero on Mount Washington, so we sent a guy up with a pot of boiling water to dump out and turn to snow, and filmed it. Put your mittens on and click
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Providence man popped over pile of pot by police who proceed to pinch his pick-up for possible proceedings
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U.S. hospitals are suffering a major shortage of IV bags and saline products. Wanna guess where one of the biggest U.S. suppliers of said products has manufacturing plants?
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Finnebrogue has saved our bacon
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Existing pot shops will have to get new California licenses to comply with the new regulations. So, things may get a little strange for the month of January
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Court rules that an Oregon bakery who refused to make a wedding cake for a lesbian couple because of religious bigotry will have to pay the couple $135,000 in damages
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Yes, there were 40 thousand pounds .... of avocados
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This ONE SIMPLE TRICK will allow Blue States to give middle class citizens a tax cut while completely end-running the GOP's tax sham
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You just witnessed a van slowly jump the curb and hit a building in downtown Seattle. Do you A) Check on status of injured, B) Call 911 or C) Beat the crap and curse out the driver who already had a medical episode?
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| Thu December 28, 2017 |
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Atlanta TV anchor succumbs to a stroke while driving to her stepfather's funeral. Fark needs a "Depressing" tag
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At last Canada's national nightmare is over: RCMP find owner of stolen Pepsi machine dumped in New Brunswick potato field
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Woman in California says she wants to have a baby. NOW. Everyone in the supermarket lines up to help
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Last known Fuzzy-Wuzzy Angel, who were New Guinean tribesman that helped provide supplies to Australian troops and evacuate injured soldiers during WWII dies at age 92. Godspeed sir
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Jersey Shore locales cancel polar plunges due to "extreme cold." Wasn't that kind of the point? MN Farkers laugh derisively as their polar plunges will be at least 20 degrees colder
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Why doesn't the United States use the metric system? Pirates. Yar
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Bad idea, diving off a pier running from the cops. Worse idea, driving off a pier while running from the cops. With helpful video
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Sure is dusty in Kentucky, what with all the cancer. Tag is for Drew
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Here's some insane video of absolutely vicious beasts turning on a camera man, attempting to devour him completely
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Airport goat yoga is a) a good description for TSA screening procedures, b) the name of subby's garage band, c) a real thing
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A hair salon that offers butt implant surgery? That should've been a red flag right there
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You know a forecast winter storm in Montana will be a doozy when it's described as "meteorologically beautiful" and "likely quite crippling"
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Sorry Earth, soooooooo close but no asteroid to kill you off today
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| (Wicked guy) |
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Photoshop something really scary on the other side of the fence
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Surgeon caught using used rectal catheters on at least five patients has license temporarily suspended. Wait, just temporarily?
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"Thanks for helping to save people during the terrorist attack in London. For your trouble, here's a £270 bill for running a red light while you were fleeing for your life"
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The leader of the Salvation Army takes concert tickets that were supposed to be given to the homeless and gives them to his own family and then defends the action saying they need shelter, not entertainment. Now pass me the donated gravy
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Pro-tip: Do not leave your debit card at the scene of the robbery you just committed. Bonus: Mighty forehead, maybe fivehead mugshot goodness in article
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Three women jailed for stealing $600 worth of Flonase and baby formula. So much for *that* New Years Eve party
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Shoplifting at Walmart while carrying heroin, a gun and human teeth is no way to go through, life, son
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This is the reason you don't put a restaurant in every city and town in the country and clog the market (Warning: Slideshow)
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Judge Ric Romero tells woman who rode a motorbike naked, got fingered in the street, and punched a blind man 'your life is a mess.'
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Damn Oompa Loompas
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After 80 years, it is no longer illegal to pull your log in Orkney
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Not only is corn Illinois' official state vegetable and popcorn the official state snack, but soon it will also be the official state grain and thus, will finally unite the three Houses of Corn. Corn
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| (Wicked guy) |
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Photoshop this rainbow of roundy things
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Gunman robs local Family Dollar in under 10 seconds. Well honestly, how much time would you actually need?
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We are looking for a few good mermaids
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Yet another story of a person rescued after being lost at sea for seven months. This time it was a man and his cat
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Do as I say not as I do
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Woman says 50 packages stolen from her doorstep. I dunno. Maybe after the first couple dozen, have them delivered to a UPS Store or sumpthin'?
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Instashop this shot blocker
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Sue chef
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The waterbed turns 50. You forgot about the goldfish you dumped in there when you were high back in the '80s, didn't you?
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Woman can't sue school over a prank the students pulled on her
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To all those that are trying to pay their 2018 property taxes in 2017. Yeah about that, the IRS says they are deductible only if assessed and paid for in 2017
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Grits, now a weapon
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I'll be taking this Fiji water and whatever cash you've got
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Because who wouldn't want to live in a van down by the river?
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Newly dating couples, if you want your dating to last into marriage you should only see each other twice a week. Subby, who has been married 27 years and lives with what's her name swears by this
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Evangelical Christianity has been making great strides in recruiting TONS of new minions...for the atheists
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Woman throws husband a vasectomy party. Real food items include Milk Duds, beef jerky, meatballs and tiny sausages
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The culture war is being won by corporate America
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Hope for America: We're no longer drinking as much Icehouse, Miller Lite, Bud Light, Busch, Natural Ice, Budweiser, Natural Light, Miller High Life, Keystone Light, or Bud Light Lime as we did when we were in college
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There is no better way to attract customers than an enormous angry white Trump-dog hybrid pointing at the sky
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Dog rescued from not-so-frozen pond in Utah by heroic hero is still doing fine. Also, the kid is awake
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You know what the Grand Canyon needs? Zip lines
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Newlyweds find photos showing that they were meant for each other
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An enterprising Southern California couple beats Amazon to the drone delivery marketplace
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2017 White People Awards
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Let's look at how North Korea would wage war on the US. Apparently, they'd use that stick and maybe a map
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No one goes into a barbershop and says "Give me the Larry Fine"
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Theme of Farktography Contest No. 660: "Hit Me With Your Best Shot 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
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| Wed December 27, 2017 |
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Remember those nice grandparents who got busted with 60 pounds of weed intended as presents for friends and family? Guess who their son is
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Apparently, a large dead animal in your luggage is now against the rules
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Guy mistakenly fires off gun while renewing car tags at Michigan Secretary Of State office. Gets 100 on "Mad Max Driving Test"
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Supermarket: So sorry for us screwing up your meat order for the holidays, here's a box of chocolates with some maggots
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Something very strange that resembles a flaming taco shell has been found at the bottom of a loch in Scotland. No word yet if it belongs to Nessie
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Woman who endured months of Detroit bus rides to medical appointments after carjacker drove her car into her house, punched her in the face and dragged her down the street gets stolen car paid off, new Jeep SUV for Christmas
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You know what sounds like a fun time? Spending $100 for a ticket to visit Disneyland on one their busiest days of the year, and while waiting an hour in line for a ride suddenly being told the ride is closed due to a power outage
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♬ Adolf, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz? My friends all drive Volkswagens, I must make amends ♫
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Won't buy cigarettes for a teenager on Christmas? You better believe that's a car stealin' and crashin'
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How shady was the scheme that landed "Pharma Bro" Martin Shkreli in jail? Let's put it this way: even his LAWYER was just convicted of fraud for being part of it
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After years of artillery strikes, North Korea announces full-scale invasion of its sworn enemy, the sea
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Protip: if you try to rob someone at a casino and fail, I mean let 'em go, because man, they're gone. Fark: Seriously, quit. Don't follow the guys for 20 miles to a police station parking lot and try to rob him *again*. Just sayin' is all
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Turns out Civil War general Nathan Bedford Forrest was gay
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Photoshop these people with a good head for tomatoes
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Deadspin calls it "diarrhea sludge" but locals of Cincinnati take Cincinnati Chili seriously. So seriously they will fight for it, and steal recipes for it
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That must have been a good cookie
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Have you ever been pregnant ... on weed?
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Nigerian Air Force agrees to buy $600M in fighter planes from America. Transaction will be finalized as soon as the U.S. sends them $50M to cover attorney's fees and taxes
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South Carolina lawmaker wants to increase fines for drivers who go slowly in the left lane. Still no extra fines for people mistaking farmers market for street
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Hey, we should like totally throw a sandbag from the freeway overpass for the lulz. What's the worst that could happen
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You may want to sit down for this. North Korea's safety standards for nuclear testing may not be all that high
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Throngs of bored teenagers arrested for being bored teenagers
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Remember that old commercial where the old lady throws the tire through the window of a Discount Tire store because she was unhappy? Well this is exactly like this, except it's a guy and he drives his truck through the dealership window
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Photoshop these tall buildings
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Headline pulled from the files of Ric Romero: Alcohol makes people more racist and homophobic
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Britain once again brought to a standstill by three inches of snow, as the colonies chuckle
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♬ We been sliding down these roads of ice, skiing in an Amish paradise. I fell down not once but twice, skiing in an Amish paradise. It's hard work for our horse named Brice, skiing in an Amish paradise. ♬
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Creature caught on camera on Lake Michigan either sea monster, shark, or streetlight (w/ video)
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Semi crash spills hundreds of cans of beer on West Virginia highway. But don't worry it was only Coors Light and Miller High Life
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"So, Skittles have different fragrances and different colors - but they all taste exactly the same"
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Move over pot brownies: California prepares for marijuana in wine, trail mixes, tacos, and other edibles. Tacos?
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After accepting blankets from first-class passengers, passengers booted from plane and accused of theft, flying while black
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Fark NotNewsletter: The final week of depravity
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| (Some Guy) |
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67-year-old man is prohibited from possessing orange balloons after hundreds of photos showing girls either holding or blowing them up were found by police
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Toronto thief steals the veal. When caught, he'll be jailed here all week
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"I just made the decision I was going to go get him. I knew what I was getting into. I knew how cold that ice would be. I knew about how much time I had in there. I knew exactly what I was getting into when I got into that water"
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Worst. Art. Critic. Ever
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Apparently there are still some actual newspapers in circulation, and someone managed to slip homophobic slurs into a reporter's byline in one of them
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We have reached the end of an era: that of the big-name news anchor
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Photoshop this blacksmith
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Meet Frida. She is a rescue dog with a "sixth sense" for finding humans. This is your Woofday Wetnose Wednesday thread
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Get off her lawn
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Knzcfsdkfsadvnksvvmsdgsv
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Georgia Confederate statue gets a facelift
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A new study shows 3 million civilians in the US carry a gun with them every day; 9 million at least once a month. As we've been told over and over and over, this is why hundreds of thousands of people get shot every day
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Police officer actually charged for killing someone with a Taser
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Dashcam three-car pileup in L.A. as they watch Space-X launch
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Billionaire blowhard says yet again that he thinks the NFL is in decline
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"LAX - LAX flight complete. Flight time, 8 hours and 20 minutes"
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Never count the starfish out
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Fruitcake continues reign of terror, triggers bomb squad investigation
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Fark-ready headline: "I Went A Month Without Pooping, And It'll Probably Happen Again"
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Subby's drunk right now, but Mike Huckabee is stupid. In the morning, subby will be sober and Mike Huckabee will still be stupid
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2017 was a great year to be rich. YA THINK?
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| Tue December 26, 2017 |
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Old and busted: Grave robbing for dissection bodies. New hotness: Grave robbing for Christmas decorations
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Florida robbery quiz: 1) beat with vase 2) stripped naked 3) shot at 4) found in gas station 5) all of the above
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Ugly-ass baby bongo born at Audubon (pic)
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He slides in ..... and HE'S SAFE
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Don't worry, the oysters will save us...said no one, ever
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Being a heathen who doesn't believe in god over the festive period can be awkward. Here's what it's like to have no religious soul
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Saudi Arabia hopes chess tournament where Jews are banned and women must wear robes will help the country attain modern-day cultural relevance... or at least baby steps towards 15th-century relevance
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The true meaning of the traditional Kentucky Fried Chicken Christmas in Japan
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Having trouble spitting out the words to curse out your relatives this holiday season? Here's how to swear in sign language
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Another reason why we can't have nice things
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| (Some Guy) |
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Photoshop this confident tuber
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Subby's gorgeous friend makes news as modern-day Job: Lost her mom to cancer at 11, was a Columbine victim at 14, and became a war widow at 20. Now she faces stage IV colon cancer at the ripe old age of 33
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And at No. 7 on the hit parade of Florida weirdness: "Driver refuses to unclench his heroin-hiding buttocks"
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Los Angeles opens a selfie museum which costs $25 to enter. Comes with a "sucker" t-shirt
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Meet the 6-year-old with 670,000 Instagram followers
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Click link. Mods please make link submission thingee easier to use while drivi
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Japanese banana has edible skin; bunches of people split as to whether that's appealing
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Not news: Marijuana ties up the police and clogs the courts. Fark: because of legalization
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Traces of Noah's Ark found in Turkey. Please pass the gravy
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Photoshop this tomb
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Next year your local Salvation Army bell ringer might take plastic instead of your cash
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Top 10 holiday gifts getting returned this week. Come for the $365 yoga chair, stay for the Funko Pop of yet another Hollywood actor accused of sexual assault
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"In order to purchase Carmichael a bullet-proof vest, the department took donations from Bob's Market and Greenhouses Inc., Tudor's Biscuit World, and Smoke Time Sam's" -- Hard times in Rural America
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Enter: the lobster ramen burrito
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Talk about a White Christmas. 34 inches of snow fell in Erie, Pennsylvania on Christmas, 19 inches before dawn on Tuesday to bring the total to 53 inches
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Wild, wild horses are dragging away the west
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Good luck
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PSA: If you're trying to warn a Twitter friend that you have photos of her boyfriend cheating, you'd better be damn sure he doesn't have an identical twin
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| (Some Old Gal) |
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Photoshop this starting line
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You know you're in Florida when you witness a man punching an ATM for giving him too much cash
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Jesus Christ, it's a lion. Get in the *CLANG* never mind
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Happy Boxing Day, everyone. Wait, what's Boxing Day?
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Driver who ran over seven people will face no charges. One guess why. Okay, two guesses. Three, max three, and...okay, four...uh, just click
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Oh, Flying Spaghetti Monster, grant us the strength to pry the cork from the wine bottle to toast your glorious noodleness
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Friends of 60 years find out they're actually brothers, suddenly get on each others nerves
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Guess whose ancient Merry Christmas tweet totally destroyed Donald Trump's 2017 Christmas tweet by a million miles. Yep, you're probably right
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Nose to nose and head to head, two athletes fall in love, but love kicks them in the ass
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Man stabbed with ice pick dies of his injuries
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| Mon December 25, 2017 |
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Trump business partners plan for luxury hotel on the International Space Station
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| (Some Guy) |
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Photoshop this smooth release
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At 8PM EST it's Paul's Memory Bank's Christmas Show. One hour of traditional to contemporary then Christmas comedy, in the second hour two episodes of the "I Love Lucy" radio precursor "My Favorite Husband"
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Icelandic man tries to sell you on culinary merits of skata, the national equivalent of durian. "It is one of the most debated gastronomic issues in Icelandic society, even more than putrefied shark"
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Photoshop this home on the range
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It's the most wonderful time of year: when we review the objects idiots got stuck in their various body orifices over the last twelve months. "It was a one-in-a-million shot, doc. I'm tellin' ya"
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Pope calls for peace in the Middle East. This is not a repeat since the first Christmas
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Moscow bus decides it would rather take the subway
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Step 1: Take off your top. Step 2: Steal Baby Jesus from Vatican nativity. Step 3: Defeat the patriarchy?
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8-year-old killed two adults in 2008. He's now about to anonymously walk free. They still don't know why he killed them
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Yeah go ahead and rob a store in one of the country's busiest airports on the Friday before Christmas. I'm sure that the cops won't be around. Oh what's that? You're also on the DEA's Most Wanted list?
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The original war on Christmas was started by the Society for the Prevention of Useless Giving
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Best. Gift. Ever
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Nothing says Merry Christmas like spelling out the words with more than 7,000 dominos, Christmas ornaments, mistletoe, Christmas lights and way the hell too much time on your hands
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Creepy low-life racist is hiding out in Ohio. OK, everybody in Ohio, looks like it's time to pin the Klan hat on the douchebag racist
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| (Weirdest. X-Mas Card. Ever) |
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Captain Steroid presents his 8th Annual X-Mas Photoshop Contest. Theme: Weird holiday photo. Top 3 'shops receive 1 month FREE TotalFark. Difficulty: Non-TFers only. Contest ends @ 11pm CT. Merry X-Mas, everyone. :-)
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If you crashed into a utility pole, taking out the bottom half but leaving the top suspend in midair, the police would really like a call explaining how you managed it
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American propaganda at its best: The real reasons for NORAD's "SantaCams" on Christmas Eve and how it all came about
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I'm bartending at the Brooklyn Safehouse, in Greenpoint, on Christmas Day. I'm opening around 4pm. Any Farker that comes in, I'll provide a free drink. I'll also provide fresh popped popcorn and other snacks
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| (Some Christmas Guy) |
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Yes
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Well, Christmas is finally here, and you know what that means. Yes, Easter egg displays in stores
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Skiers in the French Alps get an early Christmas present as they get stuck on a gondola high above the ground
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Maybe requiring a signature for the delivery of $5,000 in kidney medication would have been a good idea
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It's gotten to where a Muslim can't even celebrate Christmas without receiving death threats. From other Muslims
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Is the Christmas Pickle a real thing? It's been awhile since we had a decent pickle incident. Hiding the pickle in a Christmas tree is an old German tradition. True or False? How many of you have a pickle in your tree right now? Be honest
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This just in: Santa moving to south pole due to climate change. Oh, Canada
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Town in N.J. tries to prevent non-residents from driving on its streets. "Freie Fahrt für freie Bürger" is obviously a foreign concept
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