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Sun December 17, 2017
(LiveLeak)
 
 
 
If your Christmas order was in this USPS truck, it may be late and flat
source: liveleak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
The final Boeing 747 U.S. commercial flight happens this week. Farewell, big guy
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Meanwhile, at story hour down at the library
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Bad apologies are worse than no apologies
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this plinth harboring some art
source: greatfreedomadventures.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
"The concern was that it was aluminum foil and it had wires sticking out of it and it was making a beeping sound so we were kind of concerned it could be a bomb," said Police Captain Ida Nowaddabomblookslike
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
If you're reading this headline in California, put down the damned phone and concentrate on your driving
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Merry Crabstmas
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Airline finally kicks out a passenger who truly deserved it
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Flying through Atlanta? In a hurry? Well...someone pulled the plug and now all flights are canceled. Bummer, dude
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wordpress)
 
 
 
Photoshop this nut-grabbing tit
source: metrouk2.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It's nearly Christmas, so here's your annual Daily Mail article that shows the shocking behavior of people who just want to have a good time during the holidays
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Iguana these damn lizards outta here
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Authorities investigating death of Canadians worth $3.7 billion or about $19.95 in U.S. money
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
It's called "phantom debt" and it's a scourge bedeviling millions of Americans. Here's the story of one man who fought back -- with a vengeance
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
We tried four brands of eggnog ... so you didn't have to. Seriously, who drinks this stuff?
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Star Wars Spoilers Reminder: A reminder about spoilers. Spoiler alert: they're not cool
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KXLY Spokane)
 
 
 
Moose rescued after getting tangled in swing set; no word on whether Farmers Insurance was involved
source: kxly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
Good news, everyone: It's not just NATO aircraft that hotshot Russian pilots like to buzz
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSVN Miami)
 
 
 
Pet monkey stolen, man with the yellow hat left devastated
source: wsvn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Egypt reopens the ancient library at Sinai, unveiling it's ancient secrets
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this unbearable scene
source: yourshot.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Racked)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Weird gifts
source: racked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
So why do we put oranges in Christmas stockings, anyway?
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
🎶 Rocky raccoon, crawled in, it went boom. 🎶 Power went out for ten thousand. 🎶
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Manson's entire estate of Swastika carving knives and Terry Melcher voodoo dolls has been left to a prison pen pal
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Annual gun buyback nets a bazooka, two tanks, and a rail-gun. The tanks were a pain, always having to move them for parking. And they get only a half mile to the gallon
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
As China ratchets up its anti-terror campaign, thousands of Muslims disappear without trial. Jeff Sessions seen sitting atop his enchanted tree, taking notes
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 2 Fort Myers)
 
 
 
Hello, 911? Yeah, I'm stuck in a chimney. Well, it's not my chimney. Um, can we not go into that? Also, please don't send the cops
source: nbc-2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
If you spend $150 on a website promising "reindeer food," "snow from the North Pole," and a "real letter from Santa for your child," why are you shocked to learn you've been duped?
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
"Seattle flight T-311, taxi to runway 2 left, and await further instructions, over." "Roger, tower, T-311 taxiing to 2 left, approaching final takeoff position HOLY SH*T WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?"
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Hoboken Police Chief live tweets SantaCon arrests
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Trump administration expands their 1984-inspired thought control strategy, gives multiple Health and Human Services divisions instructions on replacing ungood words with designated politically-correct newspeak terms
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
AL.com achieves the impossible and somehow comes up with a ranking of "The Ten Most Redneck Counties in Alabama"
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat December 16, 2017
(iNews (UK))
 
 
 
Another nation full of those evil Democratic Socialists has voted to treat drug addiction as a medical issue instead of a crime. Won't somebody think of the prisons?
source: inews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Principal photography wraps up at Queens high school
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Streetlight has U.S. military baffled
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Stoners explain why they prefer crappy weed (shake). Because they're stoners?
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Retronaut)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Demon photoshoot
source: i.amz.mshcdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KJZZ Tempe)
 
 
 
Arizona state senator proposes bill to outlaw the advocacy of legalizing marijuana on billboards in the state
source: kjzz.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Boy, 14, empties mom's bank account playing FIFA on Playstation. That kid deserves a good, swift kick
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fredericksburg)
 
 
 
We're pretty laid back here
source: fredericksburg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Do You Remember)
 
 
 
Over the last 100 years, the most popular boy's name in America have been James, John, and Robert. The 100th most popular name is Logan. Milo still begging to get noticed
source: doyouremember.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these baby-pushers
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
70 years ago, this is how Scotch was distilled and bottled
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Yee-haw, let's go tree huntin'
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
That's not a speed bump - THIS is a speed bump
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Cell phones, which were considered dangerous, then safe to use, are once again dangerous according to state that puts carcinogenic labels on everything
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Meanwhile, in Detroit...
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live Science)
 
 
 
Younglings, if you suck at dating, the problem is not you. It's evolution. ..and the fact that you have no communication skills
source: livescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Atlanta)
 
 
 
Sorry, mayor. Can't give you the keys to the mayor's office. Maybe you should have thought about that before being black
source: atlanta.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DW)
 
 
 
Now that's what I call pennies from heaven
source: dw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
The Salvation Army has received far less donations than they normally do. Guess people aren't living in Generous City anymore
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FB Photos)
 
 
 
Photoshop this FABULOUS hair
source: scontent-atl3-1.xx.fbcdn.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
Weeners
 
BBC embarrassed after airing footage of man at concert waving a BBC in the air (not safe for work)
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Yeah, humans are gross on the Internets. REALLY gross. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Modern Metropolis)
 
 
 
Eye see it's time for Caturday
source: mymodernmet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Take a break from your troubles and stress and enjoy the winners of the 2017 Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
They are called the GREEN Berets for a reason
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
See with your eyes not your ha... Oh
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
"County commissioner accused of sexual harassment was previously investigated for spanking female students while he was a high school club adviser"
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Looks like you women were wrong. Reports of sexual harrassment at Fox News were "nonsense" according to Rupert Murdoch. It was just some flirting
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Record)
 
 
 
Shouldn't tap that
source: dailyrecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lacrosse Tribune)
 
 
 
And your mom wasn't mentioned once
source: lacrossetribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Poughkeepsie Journal)
 
 
 
City transit systems channel Douglas Adams, say they love the sound of missed safety deadlines as they go whooshing by
source: poughkeepsiejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Guy doesn't like that his girlfriend is a stripper so he. A) Helps her find a new job. B) Offers to pay her way. C) Torches the club she works for
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 15, 2017
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Doctor helps former patient deliver baby at gas station. Parents to name the child Ethel
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Best Korea unveils its new domestic streaming video app. Sit down with the family and catch up on past seasons of "The Walking Kims", "Better Call Un" and "Gilmore Traffic girls"
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Slovenia, Slovakia, Whatever
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Ib Melchior, call your office
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Study shows ketamine relieves suicidal thoughts, increases urge to make love to the giant marshmallow outside your RV
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Stolen $10K Louis Vuitton purse returned with apology note, possibly as thief refuses to be seen in public with anything other than Hermès or Chanel, you unsophisticated barbarians
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Spinal Tap needs a new drummer
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Scotland's booze is going up in price--by a lot
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Hey did you just fart or is there a dead mouse in my dashboard?
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
*Beedle-oop* *door slam*
source: help.aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wordpress)
 
 
 
Photoshop these cold and lonely explorers
source: etenews.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Mysterious grass-covered man hides in bathroom at senior citizen center prepping for new season of American Horror Stories audition
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVH Helena)
 
 
 
"Butte porch pirate caught on video"
source: ktvh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Ambulance use drops as Uber popularity grows, study finds
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Scientist claims we'll stop drinking alcohol and deleting Politics tabs within a generation
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Edge (Ireland))
 
 
 
Pub in Galway, Ireland looking for the strong woman who yanked one of their steel bollards straight out of the ground. Warn that she should be approached with caution as she may yank your bollard too
source: dailyedge.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Can we haz caption contest?
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
When performing surgery it is important for the patient to be sedated. The anesthesiologist, not so much
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Gee, its almost as if kids were only smoking pot because it ticked off their parents
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Workers at hip club and pizza shop found to be workers at hep club and pizza shop
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Photoshop evidence of aliens for the scientists to find
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RTE Ireland)
 
 
 
No longer news: Two men get married in Ireland. Fark: neither is gay
source: rte.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Actual headline: Pensioner tries to batter cock after it kept him up all night
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Eater)
 
 
 
Why Americans don't eat horse meat like many other cultures
source: eater.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(US Naval Institute)
 
 
 
Battle flags captured during the obscure Korean-American war of 1871 discovered hidden at U.S. Naval Academy. Americans may have forgotten about the war but:North Korea claims it was started by Kim Jong Un's great great grandfather
source: news.usni.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Oh, the huge irony
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
NewsFlash
 
Strong quake hits Java - deaths, collapsed buildings, tsunami warning
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Arrrrrrrrrrrh mateys, lets board this new 200ft super yacht that's modelled on a 17th century pirate ship and commandeer some dingys
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Woman who survived horrific crash believes God spared her life. Of course, logically, we must now infer that God killed the other woman who died in it
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready headline: Man stranded on lake fountain after stolen swan boat drifts away
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talk Radio (UK))
 
 
 
Prince Harry has organised his wedding on the same day as British soccer's cup final. This news has gone down as well as you might expect
source: talkradio.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
If only we could have known the New Mexico school shooter, who went by the online aliases "Adam Lanza" and "Future Mass Shooter," would become a killer
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
People in Abilene, Kansas can breathe a sigh of relief as a bear associated with a candy factory there has been found
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Damn near killed 'em
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop her giving a good paddling
source: i.ytimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 17 Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
UberEATS now delivers from McDonald's, since your Uber driver already makes those fries while working his other job
source: fox17online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
Victoria's Secret robbers used stun guns, mace, got away with $1500 in merchandise. What's that, like five thongs?
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Why Millennials are facing the scariest financial future of any generation since the Great Depression (Warning: the first page might give you a seizure, scrolling through the article may give you finger cramps)
source: highline.huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
Canadian politician wants to treat ordinary innocent people who put peanut butter on their genitals in the general vicinity of a golden retriever the same as criminals who have intercourse with dogs
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Special Broadcasting Service)
 
 
 
Australia's wide ranging inquiry into institutional child sex abuse has recommended that Catholic priests be allowed to have more sex. Perhaps without the kids this time
source: sbs.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
TD: "After 10 months, do you really need your $846,000? Sorry about that, it's released. We cool?" Herbert: "I'm driving as fast as I can"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
In 5 years since Sandy Hook: 1,576 mass shootings; 1,788 people (at least) killed in those shootings; 6,333 wounded (at least) in those shootings. Less than 1% of our population. Sorry you got killed Aunt Bertha but you're just 1 person
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Elon Musk dislikes public transportation because it doesn't start when you want it to start, it doesn't go where you want it to go, and there might be a serial killer standing right next to you
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Good god, he's losing Fox News fans
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Amazon)
 
 
 
I'm sorry, floral what? (Possibly NSFW)
source: amazon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Lindsey Graham lays odds on all-out war with North Korea
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
The UN warns we're going to sleepwalk to war with North Korea
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
Russia may be starting to bomb US forces in Syria...on purpose
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Leaked Mormon documents reveal that Mormons believe that "self-masturbation" leads to homosexual and criminal behavior. No word on what other forms of masturbation are available besides self
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Relax, nazis. James Fields no longer faces second degree murder charges. He got an upgrade
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 14, 2017
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
Replace your father's vodak with water? That's a shootin
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FL Keys News)
 
 
 
So how do you save a parking space? This woman found a new way
source: flkeysnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
Video
 
Sheep in nativity scene picks Baby Jesus out of manger to cuddle, Mary forced to defend her baby at all costs
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Happens to me all the time. One minute I'm digging in trash bins, the next I lean against a door and stumble upon €300,000
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Anonymous person donates $86 million in bitcoin to charity. So shines a good deed in a weary world
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
This business is getting out of control
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
♫ On the first day of Christmas my nana bought for me, some g-strings for a Christmas tree ♫
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this drum dance
source: yourshot.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
 
 
"Kansas police hope to change perception of pit bulls with new drug detective"
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
You could click the link to see what the most popular audiobook of the year was, but if you listened to it you probably don't give a fark
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Snitches get stitches)
 
 
 
Toastmasters group thriving inside Arizona prison. So, you're telling me there is a more eloquent way of saying 'shank the snitch'?
source: pinalcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
All aboard survive after plane crashes in Fond-du-Lac after not being Fond-du-Flight
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
Article suggests "make cannabis-infused chocolate gelt for an adult game of dreidel this Hanukkah". Where to find a rabbi to verify that your cannabis is kosher not mentioned
source: skillet.lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Technology at its best: Dublin, Ireland spends €368million on a high-tech tram that is slower for commuters than walking
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Yes, yes, new New Star Cores thingy. Before you head off to stand in line for 8 hours in a silly costume to see Jar Jar fight the Klingons and a couple of hundred walking toy commercials, take the Weird News Quiz 12/3-12/8 Merchandising Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
The Force is strong with...a bag of shredded lettuce
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
UPS: "We seem to have lost your $846,000. Sorry about that. Here's $35. We cool?"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this raincheck
source: 4.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
"Yo, I'm a cop, gimme a discount." "B*tch, you no cop, Imma callin' the real cops." "Fark, didn't think this through, I'm out." "Hold up, b*tch, I'm a real cop, you got the right to remain silent." "Fark me" Submitter may have imagined this dialogue
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washingtonian)
 
 
 
Wawa is opening its first store in Washington DC. It will feature interactive digital screens-where customers can upload photos and messages that will flicker inside the store. What could possibly go wrong?
source: washingtonian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Driver calls ambulance after seeing person sitting still on park bench and covered in snow. Hilarity ensues
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
Bionic hand inspired by Star Wars allows man to play piano, help buddy escape from crime lord, attract lightning bolts, reconnect with estranged father
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Security Week)
 
 
 
Did you use Google, Facebook, Microsoft, or Apple last Tuesday? If so, Russia probably has your password
source: securityweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Prescription for bipolar disorder: Have as much sex as you can handle
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
A 'Large possum' caused massive power outage, and huge explosion in Rio Rancho, Corrales
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
A cow escapes from a nativity manger twice at a Philadelphia church. A spokescow states that "Stormy" is an atheist and objects to being used against her beliefs
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
NewsFlash
 
FCC votes to (Please pay $5 to read rest of the headline)
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lacrosse Tribune)
 
 
 
Shoeless suspect asks for the death penalty after calling 911 and demanding entry to the building because he left his probation papers behind. And some condoms
source: lacrossetribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WAMU American University)
 
 
 
Not news: It is a misdemeanor to curse in public in Virginia. News: State Delegate Michael Webert (R) is pushing to have the law stricken. Fark: He's from Fauquier county, so it's important to his constituents. Fark filters neutral on the subject
source: wamu.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGAL 8)
 
 
 
'Tis the season to adopt a giant constrictor
source: wgal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Disney buys 21st Century Fox for $52.4 billion, which means they'll own the "Alien" franchise, which means that the Xenomorphs born from the Queen are now actually Disney Princesses. Let that sink in for a minute
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
NJ estate up for auction is like a crack whore East Coast version of Michael Jackson's Neverland ranch
source: photos.nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
In other news, someone in Davenport, Iowa owned a Ferrari
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Texas Observer)
 
 
 
"As a doctor, I am sick of the health care freeloaders. The majority of my patients are on government-funded health care and never worked a day in their lives. I provide these freeloaders with life-saving therapies like vaccinations and antibiotics"
source: texasobserver.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FCC)
 
 
 
Verizon is allowing us to watch their execution of the internet live
source: fcc.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Hey, it's cold
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
1 in 4 teens will die just like Becky did
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this car port
source: yourshot.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
"And then, just over a month after she died, Margaret Basco submitted a comment to the Federal Communications Commission about its proposal to overturn net neutrality"
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Kos)
 
 
 
2 million citizens wrote in to the FCC to demand an end to net neutrality. Your government hears you and will work toward that end. In possibly related news, 2 million citizens' identities were stolen and used to submit fake comments to the FCC
source: dailykos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Roger Stone's go-between with Wikileaks will testify Friday. "Testify" is an English word meaning "plead the Fifth Amendment, which is not available in Russia"
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
This is why you shouldn't put Christmas lights on palm trees
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lehigh Valley Live)
 
 
 
Now we will never know why the bear was trying to cross the road
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Keaton Jones Update; bullied boy has facial scar because he was born with cranio-facial tumor. In a touching move, Keaton's dad shaved his own head as a display of support for his fellow neo-Nazis
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC4i)
 
 
 
Media outlets are having to fight in the courts for any information at all about the Las Vegas shooting
source: nbc4i.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Yorker)
 
 
 
20 years ago: " If Trump goes to Moscow, I think America will follow"
source: newyorker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClearPolitics)
 
 
 
How desperate do you have to be to want to shut down the whole FBI? Find out now on Fox News
source: realclearpolitics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Trumpers are "taking the culture back" by giving Starbucks money... again
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kickstarter)
 
 
 
Gawker alumni start crowdfunding to outbid Peter Thiel for control of Gawker's archives. Link goes to the Kickstarter campaign. Support the lesser evil
source: kickstarter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Calgary Sun)
 
 
 
Any ATM is a drive thru if you try hard enough
source: calgarysun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WOODTV Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
Police were looking for a 40-year-old suspected in a stabbing. They couldn't find her, but since they were there, figured they'd handcuff an 11-year-old girl at gunpoint
source: woodtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMC 5 Memphis)
 
 
 
Who brings lube, Sprite and chicken alfredo to attract a minor for sex? When you see the mugshot you'll know it's this guy
source: wmcactionnews5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 658: "Foods". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed December 13, 2017
(ANSFZ)
 
 
 
A sloth at the Animal World and Snake Farm Zoo in Texas has given birth to a baby sloth. The zoo is having a contest to choose a name for the baby. Difficulty: No SlothyMcSlothface
source: awsfzoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Hero two-year-old brother jumps in to beat up his older sister's wrestling opponent after he thought she was in a real fight
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
More college presidents than ever before have joined the Millionaire's Club, which should give you some comfort and pride as you struggle to pay back your student loans
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
So you want to attract hummingbirds to your garden, eh? Try flying the Canadian flag
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Man who gained fame for crude Rick and Morty courtroom exchange gets life, also goes to prison
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
"You want something to eat before your flight?" "No thanks, I'm sure I can get a bite on the plane"
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The National)
 
 
 
Airbus test crew and German air traffic control to Navy pilots drawing a dick in the sky: hold our Glühwein and watch this
source: thenational.ae   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
That guy working on the ATM for four hours may not be there to fix it
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
University College London said it chose its words 'very poorly' when it tweeted are you "Dreaming of a white campus"? when they were referring to snow
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop a Farkworthy Christmas tree
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Pieces of US military helicopters keep falling on schools in Okinawa
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Florida's Polar Express is when a freight train halves a stalled semi filled with shrimp & bacon; "Some people are so hungry they'll wash it off. Everybody needs something. It's Christmas"
source: fox13news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
With someone pooping on so many lawns in this town, police admit they don't have much to go on
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
World Health Organization says medical marijuana has no public health risks and should not be withheld from patients, World Health Organization officials
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
The BBC covers the CIA's guide for office warfare. Now, you too can be a saboteur though inefficiency, complaining, and potentially hiding behind the copy machine with a makeshift garrote constructed from office supplies
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
If your kid gets a drone for Christmas, remember to register their name, address, email, and ID number with the government. Or if you don't like paperwork you could get them a nice AR-15
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Aquarium finds novel way to keep nativity scene safe from vandals
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Yes, every great artist should sign their masterpieces, but hold on there, liver surgeon
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Bad: a couple boards your Flight with a pair of fussy babies. Good: they considerately pass out noise cancelling headphones to the other passengers. Holy Shiat: it's George and Amal Clooney
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these selfie snappers
source: main-designyoutrust.netdna-ssl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
 
 
A probable cause affidavit states the man told officers his wife, Taylor Swift, "told me to kill him"
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Hip-hop grandpa dressed as an elf brings cheer to everyone
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Meat may soon be taxed to fight greenhouse gas emissions. You'd think they'd go after cabbage first
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Another year, another lineup featuring ridiculous Williams-Sonoma Christmas merchandise. Includes floaters and SMEG, for extra LOLs
source: adequateman.deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Orcas near South Africa learn how to flip endangered Great White Sharks to make them helpless, then eat their livers. Only about 2000 Great Whites left in the wild. In other news, Great White shark livers are delicious
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Much like your mother, Detroit expects to get 5 to 8 inches tonight
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Oklahoma City zoo got a hippopotamus for Christmas. Gayla Peevey was there and approves
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
California's Skirball Fire caused by illegal cooking fire at homeless camp. "It does appear as if people were sleeping and cooking in that area. The fire department was not aware of this encampment prior to the fire"
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Extra Crispy)
 
 
 
It's that time of year again when people send you these bricks of fruit called fruitcakes during the holidays, but what exactly are they?
source: extracrispy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(iNews (UK))
 
 
 
Forget "The Last Jedi" - let's all remember the time Harrison Ford was forced to spend Christmas with Chewbacca's dysfunctional, sex-crazed family
source: inews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Seriously, how can somebody forget a baby by the sidewalk?
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
If you eat brussels sprouts for some reason, you could spend up to 1000% more
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this athletic effort
source: badzine.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Broadway dog confused by Cats. Enjoy your Woofday Wednesday
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Sheriff's department apologizes for photo showing a needle with the caption: "NARCAN: Robbing Darwin of his bountiful harvest since 1971"
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Kim Jong-Un will profit off of Bitcoin rather handsomely (possible nsfw content on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Roy Moore once again refuses to take "no" for an answer
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Robot carries Olympic torch in South Korea. Robot expected to do well in the "taking away jobs" marathon event
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Getting boozed-up by drinking donated wine left by parents and chowing down the pellet food of the school's pet guinea pig is no way to enjoy the holidays, teacher (possible nsfw content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Would-be burglar doesn't get anything, gives moon instead (NSFW video moment of the moon)
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
U.S.: "Absolutely, positively, definitely no talks until you lose the Nukes." Best Korea: "Nuh-uh." Rex Tillerson: *BLINK*
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Bernardino Sun)
 
 
 
From the "Fat Chance" Department - If you picked up any bank robbery cash thrown on 15 Freeway, police would like it back
source: sbsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Australian town had one job to do for its 150th birthday celebration: remember the actual date
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 12, 2017
(NPR)
 
 
 
You want Jurassic Park? Because that's how you get Jurassic Park
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Hey, baby. Wanna come back to my Pepco substation?
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
And now some good news: London's Euston station to turn into homeless shelter for 200 people on Christmas Day
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
NewsFlash
 
Roy Moore banned from National Mall
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
I'm a shaaaaark, I'm a shaaaaark, enjoy your honeymoon, I'm a shaaaaark
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Study from Italy finds that stubbornness increases life expectancy. Subby want to know where they found Italians who weren't stubborn for the control group
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
NYC bomb suspect sent Trump a warning, but nobody noticed since it was on Facebook instead of Twitter
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
If you've been putting off your online holiday shopping, get yer butt in gear. UPS, FedEx, DHL are already running days late
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Irish News)
 
 
 
"And if you come this way, you can see some famous artifacts from early human history and over here some famous paintings from the renaissance era...and now here is a 130 ton fatberg that was found in the sewers"
source: irishnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Policeman crashes car while off duty and takes off running wearing nothing but his birthday suit. That's a promoting
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this whole park
source: artfund.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 17 Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
Robotic device helps paralyzed patients walk. Shoulder-mounted cannon still in development
source: fox17online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
 
 
Here comes Santa B, here comes Santa B, paying layaway at Walmart
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCRA 3 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Car-ma
source: kcra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTHR Indianapolis)
 
 
 
Texan woman dumps her trash in a Colorado parking lot, discovers that the internet and police love making people like her famous
source: wthr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Otago Daily Times)
 
 
 
After the dinosaurs, giant penguins ruled the earth
source: odt.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KXLH Helena)
 
 
 
Butte Fire Department reported the fire started in the rear and then spread throughout
source: kxlh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Article asks "should we cook for our dogs?". Your dog wants steak...rare...with a banana cream reduction and peanut butter garnish
source: thetakeout.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Loudoun Times)
 
 
 
Naked man running along highway near Dulles airport, looking for TSA agent with warm hands
source: loudountimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Root)
 
 
 
The racist mother who had the stupid idea to go viral with her bullied son, then was not racist, is actually indeed racist...and stupid. Subby hopes the GoFundMe money will cover all the therapy sessions her poor son will need
source: thegrapevine.theroot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
When you make a £100 bet with your boyfriend stating that he wouldn't be able to limit his booze intake to just one glass a night until Christmas, make sure you specify the size of the glass
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
25,000 climate scientists fly to New Orleans for booze, strippers and the American Geophysical Union's fall meeting, emitting 30,000 tons of CO2 in the process
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Kentucky lawmaker molested his daughter's friend, cops closed the case, press did some digging, lawmakers from both parties want him to resign, but Gov. Matt Bevin (R-epulsive) says "hold on there"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
$100 a gram. Oh wait, that's cop math. Make it $10 a gram
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Has Banksy finally been revealed?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Trimming Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tree-trimmer
source: cdn2.newsok.biz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man runs back into burning building to save A: His children? B: His pets? or C: His phone?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Clickhole)
 
 
 
Breitbart has a pre-written web page template for when a conservative or alt-right pol gets accused of sexual assault or misconduct... and it was accidentally made live on their site for a few minutes today
source: clickhole.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Well, that's a new way of getting fired from a teaching job
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
"What are you in for?" "Murder. You?" "Armed robbery. What about you?" "Bark, bark"
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
It's time to play media fear-mongering MadLibs. Your (common object) contains (number) times more bacteria than a toilet seat
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patheos)
 
 
 
Former Hindu-turned Christian 'prophet' says he visited Heaven last year and knew Trump would be elected because "The people of Heaven decided he would." In other news, tickets to Hell increasing in popularity
source: patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Connecticut Post)
 
 
 
$10 beer pong bet turns into $15.6 million settlement
source: ctpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
According to study, more motorists die on a full moon, which is no surprise since it's very hard to drive and expose your bare arse at the same time
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hanover Evening Sun)
 
 
 
Don't you just hate it when you fire your shotgun at someone and that person was imaginary?
source: eveningsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Fire caused by air conditioner. You had ONE job
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Charles "wrong way" Jenkins, a U.S. soldier who defected TO North Korea in 1965 to avoid the Vietnam war, and was tortured and held captive there until 2005, has passed away at age 77
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Britain's new public enemy number one revealed as...... *spins wheel*.... Peppa Pig
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Ex-Facebook exec: We control the horizontal and the vertical. We can shape your vision to anything our imagination can conceive. For the foreseeable future, we will control all that you see and hear
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Bagpiper concert raises money for wounded police officer. Hasn't he suffered enough?
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Connecticut Post)
 
 
 
Son of Sam needs emergency heart surgery. No word on whether his dog is his healthcare proxy
source: ctpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready headline: "Smokers who get boob jobs have a high risk of their nipples falling off - but blood-sucking LEECHES can save them"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Merriam-Webster's: Our 2017 word of the year is "Feminism." "Menninism" still not a thing
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Police use amusing social media posts to help catch criminals. "Jorts-wearing suspect" not amused
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wordpress)
 
 
 
Photoshop this happy hiker
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Charles Manson died of cardiac arrest brought on by colon cancer. So, he suffered
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
"Florida man urinates in middle of Steak 'n Shake in front of dozens of customers"
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
San Francisco mayor Ed Lee heads off to the great sanctuary city in the sky
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Kim Jong Un just needs to commit apartheid to have his "Crimes Against Humanity" scorecard all checked off
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
DeVos to defrauded students: Fark you
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
People in Iceland really take their elves seriously
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
Yellowstone's bighorns are suffering from a scab-causing virus spread during mating season
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Drunk driver tells the cops that his name is Burger King. He then proceeds to introduce his wife, Wendy, his son Carl Jr., and the Five Guys in his trunk
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Dog named Rascal finds his forever home. After losing 85% of his blood to FLEA infestation. Previous owner finally being charged
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
If you accidentally tase a cop, you should at least get him a cake
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times of San Diego)
 
 
 
PSA: Looting houses in empty, fire-evacuated neighborhoods is sure to draw someone's attention. Especially if you're doing it while under the influence
source: timesofsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon December 11, 2017
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Woman gets kicked off Spirit Airlines flight for a) smoking, b) raging, c) breastfeeding
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Remember the good old days when all you had to worry about was your babysitter stealing from your change bowl and raiding the liquor cabinet while you were out?
source: hudsonvalleypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Root)
 
 
 
Update: No one can figure out what the fark is going on with the Kimberly Jones/bullying/MMA/racism mashup on Facebook and Instagram
source: thegrapevine.theroot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
China announces plans to recreate Shakespeare's birthplace of Stratford-upon-Avon. Next: will announce plans to recreate Charles Dickens' birthplace, Walt Whitman's birthplace, Stephanie Meyer's birthplace
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: It's time to vote... for Fark headlines
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Asshats who tried to blow up mosque are seeking "Trump Voters" to serve on Jury
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Caller reports teenagers driving around in police cruiser. Department promises Officer Rock is over 21, a bit flattered
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pyramid
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Tonight on Paul's Memory Bank (8PM ET) as we wind down 2017 we see what kind of deranged individual subby is by listening to the top 33 songs on his iPhone
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
We replaced this package sitting on a front porch with a box rigged with firecrackers. Let's see if anyone notices
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
"I will kill everybody on this plane" - quote from (a) terrorist, (b) suicidal pilot, (c) Oregon woman who was busted for smoking in the lavatory
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KAKE Wichita)
 
 
 
What do you do with a drunken sailor? 10 1/2 pounds of Meth said the jailer? Bonus PSA - never look up spiced rum on Urban Dictionary
source: kake.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 Now Fort Myers)
 
 
 
Florida man learns the hard way that the phrase "don't pour gasoline on a fire" is not just an idiom
source: fox4now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
'Cocoa turns electrical boxes into art.' That's nothing, you should see what it can do to milk
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The official Vladimir Putin 2018 calendar is out
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
We've finally found out what happened to Obama's Magic Weather Machine. It turns out that Kim Jong Un has it. Thanks Obama
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these stalks
source: fthmb.tqn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Baby milk maker issues global recall over salmonella fears. See, this is why you have to practice food safety when milking babies
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Convicted serial killer Todd Kohlhepp says there are many more victims who have not been discovered and he's in no mood to talk about them
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Herald)
 
 
 
Comic strip assignment about Hitler's rise raises questions at Gurnee school. Like, was Hitler really a pony?
source: dailyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Port Authority bomb suspect rode subway from Brooklyn to Manhattan blast site
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Want to become famous by recording viral videos of yourself doing dangerous stunts on tall buildings? Just remember, for every skyrocketing star, there's one going down quickly
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(War is Boring)
 
 
 
Someone fetch my fainting couch: Yet another scary Russian military program is probably vaporware
source: warisboring.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Meet the 8th highest-grossing YouTube "star," a 6-year-old who earned $11 Million un-boxing and playing with toys. Also, BareFark is still a bargain at $2.50 a month
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Saudi Arabia is going to test the Theory of Slippery Slopes by allowing movie theaters, women to drive
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop this couple necking
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
There's surge pricing and then there's yougottabefarkingkiddingme pricing
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
California wildfires are now larger than Boston and New York City, but how many Rhode Islands is that?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
NewsFlash
 
Explosion at Manhattan bus terminal. On the left, not much information. Jumping to conclusions on the right
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
Three years after threatening to press charges against an engineer for doing math without a license, the Oregon State Board of Examiners for Engineering and Land Surveying finally has the good sense to be embarrassed and drop the whole thing
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
California running out of prisoners to fight its wildfires. In other news, California uses prisoners to fight wildfires
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Woman accused of stealing 144 bottles of nail polish. This will varnish her good name
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
What in the mother fark is a hit-skip in OHIOTUCKEY? Are these the same assholes who call soda, "pop" instead of Coke?
source: cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
Every Chicago police officer is now equipped with a malfunctioning body camera
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
When you threaten someone's life on Twitter, try not to show your license plate
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
I bet all you cynical asshats who said Trump only wanted to shrink Bear's Ears National Park because Obama created it feel really stupid now knowing that he's really shrinking it because the Uranium Mining Lobby ordered him to
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Famous shirtless protester from Charlotte is now a City Councillor who oversees the police
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
That's one way to win an election. Not a very SUBTLE way, though
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
Every farking year. You know this wouldn't happen if they'd just nail Him down
source: cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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