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Sun September 10, 2017
(Willamette Week)
 
 
 
White supremacist arrested after he tries to plow into crowd of counter protestors with pickup truck
source: wweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Irma girder
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
People have problem with advertisement for lamb that makes fun of people's imaginary friends
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
Don't leave home without your . . . uh, I dunno, your home?
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Name it Irma?
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Krebs On Security)
 
 
 
Worried because you checked the website Equifax put up to see if your information was compromised and it was? Just log in again and you may get a different answer
source: krebsonsecurity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Naturally, there are looters about during Hurricane Irma
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this caravan
source: biovoicenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Dammit pet people of Florida in the way of Hurricane Irma, STOP tethering your animals to trees and leaving them there on your way out
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Herald)
 
 
 
This is why when your kid wants to go to the park, you take your kid to the damn park
source: dailyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida disaster.org)
 
 
 
Information on open shelters in Florida
source: floridadisaster.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Fark ready headline: "Male escorts reveal the hardest part about their jobs"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Look up in the sky, there's a drug war going on above our heads
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Bad: Hurricane evacuee died in the shelter, with "no place to remove the body to." Worse: and he could be there for a few days. Fark: The building currently has no power or water, and food supplies are already starting to dwindle
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: New Guinness World Records
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
(Ham x ham x ham) + sidewalk = wtf
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
One in three millennials wish they had grown up as their baby boomer parents because now there's nothing left but gloom and doom
source: standard.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
What the creepy tag was created for
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
The latest thing we ignorant savages have been cooking wrong all along: bacon
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Racist Iowa footballers update: Some considering lawsuit, one's parents apologize, and how the team's black quarterback is handling it
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Outside Online)
 
 
 
Glacier National Park is burning
source: outsideonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Manatee County issues emergency update on Irma with an ASL "interpreter" who CLEARLY has no idea what he's doing. This captioned video describes what he was actually telling Deaf people
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Cruise ship fleeing Irma now stranded at sea with 4,000 passengers and unlimited booze. And the problem is?
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
We really need to clarify what is a hedge and what isn't a hedge to avoid all this hedge-rage
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
I hacked you period. Did you hack me question mark. Please, please exclamation point. I want your data in parentheses
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
You people who feel the need to take your precious puppy everywhere you go, stop pretending your dog is a service animal
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop what this Cardinal is holding
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Your classic TV
source: apex.aero   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Plain popcorn kernels cannot contain gluten. Yet, there are some brands of popcorn that have the non-GMO seal and are labeled gluten free
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Can you ever really promise that 2,000 alligators won't be able to get loose during a hurricane?
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBUR Boston)
 
 
 
Homeless drug-addicted women are commonly victims of rape, but reporting it often makes them even more vulnerable
source: wbur.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Male students kicked out of school because their hair was? A) Too long. B) Green. C) Too short
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sacred Artichoke)
 
 
 
Coming up at the top of the hour it's a very special Livingston Stapler Company Presents in honor of our beloved soosh who passed away earlier this week. LGT the first greenlit LSCP show from August, 2012. Please join us in paying tribute to soosh
source: sacredartichoke.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Coconuts)
 
 
 
Thai woman cons 8 men by marrying them and then disappearing right after collecting the dowry money from the families. Here goes the bride
source: coconuts.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat September 09, 2017
(Metro)
 
 
 
A man smuggles vodka into a festival by burying it on the site weeks earlier. OK what's his Fark handle?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Quit talking to 'the guys' down in the drain kid, you're scaring the bejebbies out of your mom
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Librarian who was arrested and charged with assaulting a police officer for defending a man's freedom of speech found not guilty. Librarian celebrates like all good librarians do: with a good bottle of scotch
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bristol Post (UK))
 
 
 
Grown man gets dumped, and you're reading about this on Fark
source: bristolpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
The Ark Encounter just made $1.8 million
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Photoshop this hopping rabbit
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
People who haven't yet evacuated the Keys, "You're on your own"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marin Independent Journal)
 
 
 
Don't brag to strangers in a hotel hot tub that you are in the illegal drug business. Especially if the strangers are narcotics officers attending a two-week specialized narcotics training course
source: marinij.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Six food trends that will massively dominate the foodie landscape this fall. "Dollhouse-sized foods like mini éclairs, mini ice-cream sandwiches and mini bagel balls are what you'll be seeing all over your Instagram feed"
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
CVS finds a way to extend pumpkin spice mania to more ridiculous places
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
There once was a biker from Maine, whose motoring skill was quite lame, he ran out of luck, turning left was the truck, last heard he was saying "oh Fark"
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Pharma douche: "It was just a prank, bro." Prosecutors: "How about 'No'"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The College Fix)
 
 
 
At bizarro Berkeley University, the renaming of campus buildings takes a turn to the bizarre thanks to millennials
source: thecollegefix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
California: Remember how we were told that making marijuana an above-board business would shut down illegal growers? About that
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Eric Bolling's son found dead
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
Suffering from their worst safety record in 10 years, the U.S. Navy says they have "allowed standards to drop". In other news, Captain Obvious celebrates his promotion to Admiral
source: rt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: A "versus" movie worth watching
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(StudyFinds)
 
 
 
If music makes sex better, subby has been doing it wrong all this time by playing 'Yakety Sax'
source: studyfinds.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
17-meter-tall lobster passed in at auction; sellers considering throwing in swimming pool of drawn butter
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Go ahead and charge me. This is just a damn Walmart, and I'll be presiding at my own trial
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Caption this happy Dalmatian
source: image.pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
If you're still wondering what to do with your solar eclipse glasses you can donate them to charity, save them for the 2019 Transit of Mercury, or dress up as a solar eclipse this Halloween
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
Sometimes after a long, hard day of work it's nice to come home and find a mysterious naked woman asleep in your bed
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RedState)
 
 
 
For you procrastinators, it might be a good time to start preparing for Hurricane Irma
source: redstate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Vehicle hybrids
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
Want to see the skeletal reconstruction of a 2,000 lb giant sloth? Wait for it... wait for it... wait for it... wait for it
source: cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Guy gets sad because living in the Midwest isn't like living on the West Coast and people in Chicago don't want to be friends with a douche
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Caturday comics
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCRG)
 
 
 
Friday Knight Whites dropped from Friday Night Lights
source: kcrg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
And by the way, there are not live sharks swirling around inside Hurricane Irma
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
LaSalle County, Illinois prosecutor facing 17 felony counts related to running an unauthorized vigilante unit illegally stopping and searching 'suspicious' vehicles along I-80 for weed. What a go-getter
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
After eating nonstop since 2007, Americans are finally full
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Russians now calling the shots for U.S. military
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Cambridge Chronicle)
 
 
 
High school seniors teach juniors a lesson for parking in the wrong spots. Local police teach seniors a lesson for parking in the spots wrong
source: braintree.wickedlocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Take a good look at these people because it's probably the last time they will ever be seen again
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
North Korea should keep its nukes
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
As part of the conditional discharge, the teens were told that they were banned from accessing Internet pornography. It's a court mandated condition that the teenagers should have no problem following
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Have to admit, North Korea sure has a way with words
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Nixed for dick pix to chicks
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
Boobies
 
"She like literally was looking right at my breasts and said, 'Well, Gen, I can clearly see that you're not wearing a bra and that you have nipple piercings.'"
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
So, this house exploded right down the street from subby. Unfortunately, it was occupied
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
"Nowhere in the Florida Keys will be safe," the National Weather Service tweeted. PLEASE, Farkers south of alligator alley: finish whomever you're doing and GET NORTH NOW
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
The Hep-A outbreak in San Diego is so bad that the city plans to start hosing the streets with disinfectants
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Next Big Future)
 
 
 
The great science fiction writer and inventor of "The Rods from God" is now with him. RIP Jerry Pournelle
source: nextbigfuture.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri September 08, 2017
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
If you use the title Ms. everyone thinks you are divorced or a lesbian
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
I can fly... I CAN FLY... *wham*
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
NNYTFNOBBQOMG - Watertown New York
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Over 43,000 Americans have pledged to shoot bullets, lasers, and flamethrowers at Hurricane Irma. Because Murica
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
A look back when gritty Times Square was gritty XXX Times Square in the 1970s, not some Disney kiddy PG playground
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FL Keys News)
 
 
 
Take my car, please: Keys guy gives away car to whoever needs it for Irma getaway
source: flkeysnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Equifax removes terms of service that forced users to waive their rights to court remedies. BEHOLD THE POWER OF FA... um, er, the NY Attorney General
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: This year's new pumpkin spice-infused abominations
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Beating off is sexual battery?
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Redbook Magazine)
 
 
 
Mom refuses to evacuate her five kids because, when they moved to FL, they "knew that hurricanes were just part of the deal." Mmmmm, Coral Gables, ten miles inland with 13-foot elevation? Possible Cat-5 hurricane? Amateur Floridian, I see
source: redbookmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
When you have to announce that you weren't defeated by an 11-year-old girl, it's pretty clear that you were defeated by an 11-year-old girl
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
So what if the Russians bought $100k worth of Facebook ads to boost Trump? It's not like those ads reached 70 million people or anything
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Longtime Farker timujin has passed away
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Plane full of cats and dogs displaced by Harvey flown from Texas to San Diego. Your dog wants an upgrade (with many awww pics)
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this race car
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
What's worse than having to flee Hurricane Irma and spending close to $1,000 for a flight home from your college? Getting stuck in a smelly New Jersey rail yard because you fell asleep
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Australians turn in 26,000 guns during amnesty campaign. Americans ask if that's one guy, one family or in one small town
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Equifax has signed up everyone affected by their recent breach for complimentary monitoring through their TrustedID service. In unrelated news, this morning Equifax changed the EULA for TrustedID to say that users can't sue or join a class action
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Meet Harvey and Irma Schluter. Married 75 years and astonished to share their names with back-to-back hurricanes
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Headline: "Your cellphone porn habit isn't as secret as you thought." Wait...why did this show up under "Recommended for you"?
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
FEMA could run out of cash this weekend, which means your relatives in Florida may be moving back in with you permanently
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 17 Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
Mom wears T-Rex costume to walk daughter to kindergarten bus stop on first day of school. "Ferrell said she has a few life-size dinosaur costumes lying around the house"
source: fox17online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Seattle favorite Dick's announces new location. So if you're in the area and you want a hot bag of Dick's, here you go
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Jose can you see another category-4 hurricane?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Rush Limbaugh to evacuate Florida home after calling Hurricane Irma and climate change a ploy to sell ad time on the liberal media
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Best photo of bathroom full of flamingos you'll see outside Vegas
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
People are buying these so-called 'micro' pigs not realizing what 'small' means in the pig world
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Remember that airport on Saint Martin that's approach required Jumbo jets to fly a few dozen feet over the heads of bathers at a popular beach? After Irma, it's not there anymore. The airport OR the beach
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESA Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Since it's obviously a slow news day, let's learn about the mysterious 'Pittsburgh Potty'
source: wesa.fm   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
DOT Engineer: I will post electronic speed limit signs and make traffic change speed on my command. Drivers: What's a speed limit?
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Confederate statue cannonball thief caught on video
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tennis racket and player
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Hurricane Irma's noodly appendages are poised to make landfall, Florida and Georgia in its wake. Gas and water are in short supply as residents flee to safety or hunker down in their homes. It's your Hurricane Irma Discussion Thread. Be safe (possible Not safe for work content on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Hams)
 
 
 
Ham radio operators have already activated the Hurricane Watch Net. If you don't have a shortwave receiver, you can click the link to the left for live streaming audio
source: hwn.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Plastic surgery addict left with permanent erection after botched nose job. If the picture is any indication, he's in real trouble
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Onion)
 
 
 
Weather-weary nation not surprised by forecast of blood storms
source: theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Equifax has set up a website to check to see if you're one of the 144 million people who had their entire identity leaked on the internet due to Equifax sucking at cybersecurity
source: equifaxsecurity2017.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJLA Washington DC)
 
 
 
*cries*
source: wjla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bon Appetit)
 
 
 
Is there anything millennials can't ruin? Look what they made Le Creuset cookware do
source: bonappetit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouGov)
 
 
 
Awwwww ... welcome to the negative Internet. You'll get over it
source: today.yougov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Night food, outside beer, underwear drunkenness and other foreign concepts that don't exist in English
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
NewsFlash
 
Magnitude 8.2 earthquake hits off the coast of southern Mexico prompting a tsunami watch for Mexico, El Salvador, Costa Rica, Nicaragua, Panama and Ecuador, because why not
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NOAA)
 
 
 
Oh, shiat
source: nhc.noaa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
High School football players learn that wearing hoods, burning a cross, and waving a rifle are not ways to increase your chances of starting in Friday's game. At least not in Iowa
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 32 Chicago)
 
 
 
In 2017, war was beginning. You have no chance to survive, make your time
source: fox32chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu September 07, 2017
(CBS Miami)
 
 
 
Well, at least it is orderly, and no one has panicked and called this a Sharknado, or Gatorcane. Wait, this just in: "This is a nuclear hurricane"
source: miami.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Fish in Minnesota lake have developed a taste for human flesh
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Q13 Fox)
 
 
 
Man arrested for impersonating Jack Ryan. To be fair, that's not the worst of his increasingly implausible plot lines
source: q13fox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC2News Baltimore)
 
 
 
Shoot Out at the Taco Bell
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Churches in Texas that pay no taxes are suing FEMA demanding federal funds for recovery
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
It's official. Irma is taking her talents to South Beach
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
One brave human is going to stay and tend to the 55 Hemingway cats that wander about Key West's Hemingway House
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My News LA)
 
 
 
WeHo Sheriff's apprehend 7-Eleven's axe-wielding shoplifter suspect. With link to "Oh My God" surprise attack security footage #DontGetInvolved
source: mynewsla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Times)
 
 
 
Miyazaki officials apologize for bringing deadly tick to news conference to illustrate danger of tick-borne disease, then letting it escape. "Prefectural government officials conducted a search for the insect with the help of reporters"
source: japantimes.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
With no other news going on, Sky News decides to answer the hard hitting questions, like 'Where's the most expensive place in England to get a pint?' In related story, Drew cancels flight to Surrey
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pointed drop
source: img.fark.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Equifax hax leaves 143M potentially without fat stax
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(US News)
 
 
 
Fewer
source: usnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Tinder poo-thrower comes clean: "I have many regrets"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Breitbart contacts FBI about a DDoS attack. FBI investigates, finds it's a malfunctioning ad network on Breitbart. Damned globalist ads
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Lititz Teens come forward about their "It" Prank. You better believe there is a Skyler and Brianna in the group, too
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
The affidavit didn't state what kind of shoes she threw at the deputy's patrol vehicle, before kicking the bumper, jumping on the hood and extending her middle finger
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
This is how WW III starts: Dennis Rodman, two-time NBA All Star and full-time tackle-box face, says President Donald Trump's "crazy," offers advice on North Korea. Sports and Politics tabs are sheltering in place
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(GoFundMe)
 
 
 
GoFundMe for soosh's family. He gave us so much and it's time to do the same for his family
source: gofundme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
New Yorkers can now get a BS in Pizza Philosophy, an AO in OA, or a doctorate in I'm Walkin' Over Here tuition free
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Make Art Great Again: Border wall installation erected by the 'French Banksy,' which is probably the stinky, surrendering version
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Now the damn millennials aren't killing houseplants
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Gas station employees in Milwaukee are fed up with daily raids from juvenile thieves. One clerk gets mad and locks them inside (with video)
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop this biker
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Remember, when a hurricane wipes out everything you know, you can start over in a new place with a new life. Just, uh, that new place probably shouldn't be 'in the path of the next hurricane'
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Institutionalized Christianity in America is threatened by abundance of cheap sex. Cheap? Not everyone can afford $20, buster
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Please note: it is now legal to fart on Berlin Police
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Does your internet search history suddenly show an unhealthy interest in fish? There might be a reason for that
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Man, Bob was really on fire on the back nine today
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
"Pharma Bro", supervillain and all-around weasel Martin Shkreli auctioning off only copy of Wu-Tang Clan's album 'Once Upon a Time in Shaolin.' "At any time I may cancel this sale and I may even break this album in frustration"
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Missing toddler found in corn field, insists he was only trying to "go the distance" to "ease his pain"
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Lobster predicts six more weeks of summer. Will be steamed and served with melted butter if he is wrong
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
11-year-old finds gun, shoots himself. Police say parents need to teach kids to be more careful, point it at other people
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
You can now add "Mothers with slotted spoons" as yet another thing trying to kill you in Australia
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Smoking Hot cafeteria lady arrested for sex with teen, having sent nude pictures of herself to him which we can only assume were taken in landscape mode
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"Oops, sorry about that, my bad, I accidentally spent £850,000 that appeared for no reason in my account"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's Wednesday and I'm making pancakes for dinner tonight, mainly so I have an excuse to put pancake syrup on my sausage links, so let's the do the Fark Weird News Quiz, August 27 - September 2 edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CityLab)
 
 
 
This article lies when it says old West theme parks lie about the past. We all know from history the old West had rickety wooden buildings between steel beams of xtreme roller coasters and saloons that served $10 dollar funnel cake and $8 Coke
source: citylab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
SpaceX to help the Air Force get their spaceplane out of harm's way before Irma arrives by flying it into orbit. A little extreme but it should be safe up there
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Bentonville police said a thief trudged through the fountain waters and took off with a nearly 30-pound cannonball from a Confederate statue
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Texas woman goes full Thelma and Louise after getting arrested for shoplifting. Never go full Thelma and Louise
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Why are South Koreans such cool cucumbers if the North Koreans are about to start World War III? Hint: Life goes on
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sunset
source: static.pexels.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
The tip of Florida has a weird pink color that is itchy and a professional should look at. According to the European forecasting model, that's caused by Miami taking a direct hit from Irma. It's your Hurricane Irma discussion thread. Get the hell out of there
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
The giant unexploded WWII bomb found a few days ago? Yeah, about that
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
If you're running a fraternity where underage drinking is allowed, don't draw attention to yourself by installing an indoor waterfall on the upper floor of your frat house
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jacksonville.com)
 
 
 
John Keil, who led the team that created McGruff the Crime Dog and voiced the character, dies at 94 - or 13 dog years
source: jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Submarine builder admits to killing journalist, claims it was an accident and the sinking was a suicide attempt. Unlikely tag busy frantically wiping fingerprints
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Well so much for billionaire Richard Branson riding out Hurricane Irma in his luxury Necker Island home in the Caribbean
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Some people have a problem with Florida's attention-whore sheriff using Hurricane Irma to get his mug in the news again
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Centre Daily Times)
 
 
 
Loses loose a Lose or Lose loses Loses?
source: centredaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Authorities find indoor pool with several sharks. No word on head-mounted lasers or remains of missing spies
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
Ministry of It's For Your Own Good, Citizen cracks down on dad for c) teaching his kids how to use public transit
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Nazis are invading your town and you want to stop them. Do you call: A) The police; B) Black Lives Matter; C) The Coup Clutz Clowns
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(McClatchy DC)
 
 
 
Feds give security clearances to rustlers, cutthroats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, conmen, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwackers, hornswogglers, etc.
source: mcclatchydc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Curbed)
 
 
 
Remember the San Francisco street that was sold out from under the rich owners? Yeah, about that
source: sf.curbed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Over the past 18 months, 60,000 USB flash drives have been smuggled into Best Korea
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Today in Bizzaro World News: Trump had a "very good meeting with Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer" that end up with a Hurricane Harvey disaster relief bill that also raised the debt ceiling
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 644: "Farktography Classic: Sports Photography 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.proceduraltexture.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed September 06, 2017
(CBS News)
 
 
 
What sort of world do we live in when a 7-month pregnant woman can be denied entrance to a steakhouse because her crop top violates the dress code? EXCUSE ME, I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Schoolkids forced to make replica genitals out of plasticine. Odd as it might seem some parents have a problem with this
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Shortest engagement ever
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
Delta 302, it looks like the Hurricane Irma is going to be slamming Puerto Rico right about the time you're going to land. Might be a good idea to head back. Delta 302: Hold my beer
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this new species
source: media.zenfs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
St. Paul's Highway 51 near impassable because of: a) DACA protesters, b) space aliens, or c) poorly designed drive-thru at new Starbucks
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Just another day for NOAA Hurricane Hunters providing video of inside Irma
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(War is Boring)
 
 
 
The Russian designer of the coal-rolling Admiral Kuznetsov aircraft carrier now works for China, suggesting we may see a whole new generation of Pacific carriers bursting into flames and exploding on their own
source: warisboring.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Repeatedly walking past a gas station will cause suspicion. Doing it with no pants will cause arrest
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Torn from the home page of the Bangor Daily: Man Driving with Cat Crashes Through Wall of Wok and Roll Restaurant
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Weather Underground)
 
 
 
Katia, jealous of her big brother, declares she's a big girl now, too
source: wunderground.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Weather Underground)
 
 
 
Let's check in on Little Jose, who was just christened yesterday... Dawwwww, they do grow up so fast. UPDATE: He just went through puberty and is now a raging class 3
source: wunderground.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Like something out of a Science Fiction Horror story, Zika Virus has been used to kill cancer cells. Choice between Geek tab and Politics tab impossible. Initiating headline self-destruct sequence. See topic for details
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Four Houston women that survived Hurricane Harvey suddenly regret heading for a well-deserved vacation to Puerto Rico
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Man causes $2,000 in damages to 7-Eleven after being told he couldn't use the phone. What did he do, burn it to the ground?
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Voice of America)
 
 
 
Photoshop these metal heads
source: gdb.voanews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Salvador Dali: You are NOT the father
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Sick Dutch f**k steals duck then chucks now must pay the buck for running amok
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Longtime Farker, photographer, radio host, and friend, soosh has died
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DevonLive)
 
 
 
Man challenged to cycle over his BMW. He describes it as a 'hold my pint moment'
source: devonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Parents say they weren't notified of inappropriate touching at school summer camp, urged to check on condition of band flutes
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
U.S. Commander apologizes after "highly offensive" pamphlets are airdropped in Afghanistan. Meanwhile, scientists at DARPA reconsider their attempt to weaponize Jack Chick tracts
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
With Hurricane Irma looming, we can be sure that Florida residents will overcome adversity and work together to . . . oh, wait, they're already beating each other senseless over sheets of plywood
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Richard Branson reveals he is 'Riding the Storm Out' in his luxury Necker Island home and says he'll be boozing with staff in his concrete wine cellar when mega-storm hits (possible not safe for work content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WorldNetDaily)
 
 
 
Professor wants you to have sex with Earth. Seems like you should at least buy it a drink or fertilizer first
source: wnd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSTU FOX 13)
 
 
 
Fire at egg farm kills 300,000 chickens, smells delicious
source: fox13now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Not news: Price gouging during hurricane. News: Airlines raising prices for one way flights out of Florida. Outrageous: 600% increase
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Tiger shot in Atlanta, vows to be back for The Masters
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AccuWeather)
 
 
 
Katia joins the party
source: accuweather.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
After Irma came ashore on the Caribbean island of Saint Martin, the four "most solid " buildings on the island have all been reportedly destroyed
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Kid arrested for using fake ID. Usually, they don't take you in, but this kid pushed and bit the cop. Plus, he looks like Ted Cruz, so it was a given
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Let's fly over Pyongyang, North Korea for a rare aerial view of the city ... in the daytime of course as we know the place has no lights at night
source: au.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The craze for gin seeks to break into a new market: breakfast. Proving that Farkers have been fashion leaders for years
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Ninja biker does 110 on rural road to run from cops. Forgets they have SCMODS
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Who done farted on live TV during a newscast? The weatherman
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Photoshop this yellow hat
source: i2.cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Police "terrified" by couple of red balloons tied to sewer grates. Wait 'til they get a load of Nena
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Couple arrested for cheesy behavior at Cheddars
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Hurricane Irma is such a mean biatch she's causing seismometers to detect earthquakes
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Hurricane Irma hits the Caribbean and its cone of uncertainty is headed towards the US, with models predicting greater severity than even Andrew. Batten down the hatches and stay safe; check in with you can. It's your Irma Discussion Thread, day two
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
You know what's fun to play? Secret Hitler
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
Video
 
The best video you'll see today of an Irish guy trying to catch a bat in his kitchen
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Spare the gun and spoil the child
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tales of the Cocktail)
 
 
 
In Kazakhstan you can get a horse milk cocktail. Very nice
source: talesofthecocktail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HelenaIR.com)
 
 
 
Man only drinks 3 beers, blows a .255 BAC, gets 6th DUI. Farkers immediately begin search for that particular brand of beer
source: helenair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
Weeners
 
Denver nurses suspended for opening body bag to admire man's genitals
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Ashfall in Seattle, threadfall and dragons to follow soon
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Notorious 'Pharma Bro' douchebag Martin Shkreli is begging people to steal Hillary Clinton's hair to prove she's a murderer
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Out of control wildfire in Columbia River Gorge was caused by a) lightning, b) an accident, or c) teenagers throwing fireworks off of a cliff
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue September 05, 2017
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
Virgin Islands starts seizing guns
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
There is no such thing as a category 6 hurricane. Volume 11, 5 Lights, Ludicrous Speed all still very much in play, though
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
The worst part about living in the dorms is when a stranger walks into your room and asks for a band-aid to cover his stab wound
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Body found in Ontario fridge identified as Indy Jones, Jr. Sacre' bleu
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
It turns out the man whose body was found stabbed, wrapped in a tarp and chained to a cinder block is the son of a mobster. Authorities have not ruled out foul play
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
I had no idea you could buy gold on Amazon
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sunshine Coast Daily News)
 
 
 
Family finds six-foot snake curled up on top of fridge. Ultra rare refrigerator trifecta now in play
source: sunshinecoastdaily.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Actual BBC headline: Woman trapped in window while trying to retrieve poo
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
"With the impeachment and removal of President Donald Trump a long shot at best, there is another way to provide the country some protection from our unfit president: congressional government. "
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
12-year-old claims diplomatic immunity - Murtaugh getting too old for this shiat
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
The best part of being a senior executive in the military industrial complex is all the cool toys you get to have at your desk
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: There's a party in my pants
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Patient tells doctors he has no idea how a glass cup got stuck in his butt, they remove it anyway
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Photoshop this surfer
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
Salt Lake nurse-arresting cop fired from side job at ambulance company
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WREG Memphis)
 
 
 
Houston officer rescues nearly 1,500 flood victims while battling stage 4 cancer
source: wreg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Sure our houses are ruined, our water is poisoned, and we'll have to eat grass, but we're happy we spent so much on stadiums
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
FedEx does not believe Madonna is Madonna and won't deliver her package. How many Hail Marys will be their punishment?
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
Alligators discover drainage canal from the Mississippi River will deliver fish right to their mouths
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Weather Underground)
 
 
 
Irma just had a baby boy named Jose. And he looks to be following right in Mommy's footsteps
source: wunderground.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Man trapped in his 5th floor apartment after UPS delivers right to his door
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A mandatory evacuation order has been issued for residents of Southern Florida with special needs. So, pretty much everyone
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
When you're arrested by a foreign military in a banana republic, your boat is confiscated and you're sent to a detention camp facing an uncertain future, you puff your chest out and demand a beer. That's the American Way
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Investigators say that aman suspected of killing a 22-year-old PA student killed her at his apartment, stuffed her body into a storage container and then called Lyft to drive it 100 miles away. In response, Uber CorpseDisposal expected to launch soon
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Cops: Florida Man performed sex act on woman "in front of families and children" at Clearwater beach
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fridge
source: 1.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Alone in your hotel room and want company? RENT-A-FISH
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
Photobomb turns into photocrush
source: standard.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
After the rain, pictures of ruined Houston homes; scroll to the end to see a firefighter in a huge room full of mounted animal heads in a flooded mansion
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
This list of 'what you need to have on hand for Hurricane Irma' includes zero booze
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Happy Birthday Trololo Man (possible Not safe for work content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Pilot shares selfie of himself leaning out of cockpit while over Dubai. Apparently, some idiots think it's real: "Why you acted so dangerous that you might risk of falling and endangered all the passengers? Duh wth is wrong with you"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NOAA)
 
 
 
Irma is now the strongest Atlantic hurricane on record
source: nhc.noaa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Woman tries to eliminate witness who was Facebook Live-ing her drunk driving (with mugshot)
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Distractify)
 
 
 
Video of Joel Osteen's ushers collecting money from Harvey flood victims. Can we tax churches now? Or at least this "church"?
source: distractify.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
Peppa Pig's obviously not very familiar with Australian wildlife
source: standard.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
I like my coffee like I like my women, COVERED IN BEES
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2017-08-27 to Sat 2017-09-02
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Conversation)
 
 
 
Not to worry or anything, but have you ever wondered what would happen if all the volcanoes under Antarctica suddenly erupted?
source: theconversation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Dinosaurs march to protest national service "extinction." Not a repeat from the Jurassic Period
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Irma gherd, she's now a Cat 5
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Things found in an X-Ray photo
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Guy reports his car stolen that he himself sold the day before while really drunk
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Puzzled man has no clue, seeks help
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Irma prepares to bring its Cone of Uncertainty to Florida. Stores are clear of all but the vegan food. Hopefully everyone has their bleach, water, and generator. Check in here, stay safe; it may hit land. It's your Hurricane Irma Discussion Thread
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
"It's easy. We blame the victims"
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
"I stopped yelling at my husband and now we have more sex" says totally not made up woman
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
What started with a report of stolen leaf blowers and a pickup truck getaway vehicle ends with a stolen truck crashing into a house, a woman throwing her kid into a random passing car, and the male driver swallowing a bunch of heroin
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Pepper spray should not be a color of the LGBT rainbow
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Drug-muling carrier pigeon is shot trying to carry drugs to prisoner. Ratted out by stool pigeon
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
As God is my witness, I thought turkey subs could fly
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Behold the new Queen of England. (I didn't vote for her)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
How bad are fires in Oregon? A Portland weather reporter just left live on the air to check on his home
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
The fog is getting thicker. And Irma is getting laaaarger
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Another money hungry dumbass falls for one of the oldest scams. Lady hands over $2k to strangers to prove she's worthy to get her share of found money in a parking lot
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
If there's going to be nuclear war on the Korean peninsula, may as well have the American nukes on site to speed up annihilation
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Apparently there are some kids in the UK that don't know that the chicken came before the egg
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
New Wisconsin bill would strip repeat drunk drivers of their licenses for ten years
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon September 04, 2017
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"I didn't know people on benefits were into champagne," judge tells person on government assistance
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLKY Louisville)
 
 
 
Indiana cancer patient's wish to meet my ex-wife is granted
source: wlky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Americans work more hours than anyone else in the world. Which is why we all have such great benefits, and such high average wages compared to the rest of the world. Right?
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
A trooper has saved a kitty and now the State Police invite you to play - Name That Cat
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Okay so maybe this mom was milking it a bit to help Hurricane Harvey victims, but she did donate over 1,000 ounces of breast milk for the cause
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
1.7 billion people took vacations last year. How many brought home souvenirs they didn't know about, like a brain-burrowing nematode or a zombie protozoan?
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
8 o'clock is too early for school, claim lazy people
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Most Chicago public schools don't have librarians
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"Hey, baby, I bet you want my bathroom python in your South End"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this strong girl
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
While there's no "live" Paul's Memory Bank this week, at 8PM EDT there will be two hours of random music and comedy, ending with a mini-tribute to Steely Dan's Walter Becker
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Don't Get Involved)
 
 
 
Good Samaritan notices guy shoplifting at 7-11, offers to pay for item's he's stealing. Very "Chicken Soup For The Soul" The reality is shoplifter fights with Samaritan before fleeing. Guy then surprises Samaritan outside 7-11 with an axe melee
source: wehoville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Yes, my wife is dead, I'm covered in blood, and there's a knife beside me. But trust me, it had to be the cold medicine. It's been jealous of me since we were kids
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
20 years after 'Judgement Day' was avoided, Elon Musk says Skynet will still do us in
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Meet the new Mormons
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
You know who else performed a sex act in a cinema as he was watching a violent war film?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
US combat veterans found to be in a plot to bring Muslims with links to violent Middle Eastern conflicts into the country
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this underwater sculpture
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Erase your debts through the new miracle KKK Priesthood plan
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
North Korea threatens an electromagnetic pulse attack against America to ... SHUT. DOWN. EVERYTHING.
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Houston resident and DACA immigrant died while performing rescue efforts. His mother wants to pay her respects and oversee the funeral, but will be unable to do so unless Customs and Border Protection grant her a humanitarian visa
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Trump threatens to stop all trade with countries that do business with North Korea. Good thing the US doesn't have business ties with China otherwise I'd be worried
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Pregnant woman drops groceries on street, gives birth on street, picks up newborn and groceries, walks back home. Ta Da
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Dad catches his babysitter sleeping, so he gathers his children, leaves with them, and makes the babysitter think they were kidnapped. The Aristocrats
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Irma might be taking her talents to South Beach. EVERYBODY PANIC AND PAAARTY
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Seafood company's defense for accidentally releasing 160,000 Atlantic salmon into the Pacific: it was a tide caused by the eclipse. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts. IT WASN'T MY FAULT I SWEAR TO GOD
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Duke and Duchess of Cambridge still have functional reproductive organs
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
If you have a sudden desire to launch youself across the table at one of your relatives at your Labor Day BBQ you can thank Trump for fracturing America
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Tips on flying a helicopter: Keep the pilot's door closed, wear a seat belt, and stay in the helicopter
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The middle class is making a quiet, triumphant comeback
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
North Korea preparing to kill some fish again
source: mobile.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Arrrrr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this drinking pirate skeleton
source: i.pinimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ottawa Citizen)
 
 
 
How to decorate your home while avoiding Ikea. Tip #1...wait for it...Avoid Ikea
source: ottawacitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
The Appalachians are dying young
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
G-g-g-g-ghost lobster? Like, ZOINKS!
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Federal prisoners in Texas complaining that they might not get hot meals and that water is being rationed since Hurricane Harvey hit. Well, geez, I'll tell all the homeless and hungry people about it as they're wading through waist-deep water
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Before there were dubious memes and Snopes to debunk them, there were the Cottingley Fairies, the original fake news
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
Moscow taxi driver drives erratically, not bad for having parking attendant on the hood. Alcohol may have been involved
source: rt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Maybe they should just stop giving employees the capabilities to type words out to a receipt
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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