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Sun August 06, 2017
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
How black can a gummy bear be? See for yourself. Or don't see
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Teen goes for a dip in the ocean, returns with bloody legs after small creatures tried to EAT HIM ALIVE. Yes, Australia. (Graphic images)
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Another day, another guess as to who Jack the Ripper really was
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Your co-workers who don't watch GoT want you to know that they feel ostracized, marginalized, harassed, and excluded when you and other co-workers discuss it because they can't participate. Look out sexual harassment, there's a new offense in town
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Fugitive so dislikes the mugshot police posted on Facebook that he turns himself in so they'll take it down
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Two Chinese tourists visiting the Reichstag in Berlin quickly discover how seriously the Germans take their history
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox9 Minneapolis)
 
 
 
Well, I'm stranded in the desert. Better drink my own beer
source: fox9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Meat tenderizer?" Riiiiiight
source: williams-sonoma.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these dancers
source: alvinailey.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Right Wing Watch)
 
 
 
I think someone needs to actually read his Bible, and prepare for a tax audit
source: rightwingwatch.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Guy they've been looking for in an effort involving search parties and dogs has been found dead in his house. Probably should have started there with the search party, just sayin'
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Pig headed to auction jumps onto busy Washington interstate. Will a road hog complete the trifecta? (Not another bacon / fark foodie thread)
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
France to offer fresh oysters for sale via vending machines. And you thought gas station sushi was a bad idea
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop someone interesting into this jacket
source: iosifidis-tools.gr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCRA 3 Sacramento)
 
 
 
We know it's a day past Caturday, but hikers in Northern California just rescued a four-week-old bobcat kitten and IT'S SO CUTE. SQUEEEEEE (with video cuteness)
source: kcra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Dam
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
"Here's what my kid needs from you teachers since I'm so busy"
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Adweek)
 
 
 
Like a Meat Loaf album
source: adweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Fashion company wants to bring back the swastika as a fashion logo. I can not see anything that could go wrong with this plan
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Second deadly shooting in Baltimore's 'Nobody kill anybody' weekend. YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CityLab)
 
 
 
OM NOM NOM, or "The Brutal Saga of One Extremely Evil Railroad Crossing"
source: citylab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
New study claims Americans might be having less sex due to helicopter parenting
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Let's see, did I pack everything in my luggage? Toothbrush: check. Suit: check. Twenty-year-old model I plan to sell on the dark web...wait, what?
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Vegan cafe charges an 18% "man tax" to address the gender pay gap (some not safe for work content in sidebar)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Woman rescues piglet running around in traffic, and raises money for its medical care. Winnie the Pooh is glad to pitch in
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
So the prosecutor withheld crucial evidence and did an end run around the defendant's 5th Amendment rights. The important thing is that the DA is able to advance her career
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Can we just stop for a minute to truly appreciate all that ketchup has to offer society?
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The latest threat to your existence? Dirty sponges
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this partial hipster somewhere more...well...hip
source: cheapmonday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Your nemesis
source: spin.ph   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
When do you become an adult?
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Princess Diana asked a priest if she could marry a Muslim--Dodi--in church (possible Not safe for work content on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
For those of you afraid of turbulence: remember that you will break before the plane breaks. Wait... that doesn't help, does it?
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scientific American)
 
 
 
Report finds the economic benefits of Obama-era climate/energy rules are four times greater than the costs
source: scientificamerican.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Manchester Evening News)
 
 
 
The man had managed to sneak into a room unnoticed and when officers opened the door they say they discovered him again performing a sex act 'covered in lubricant'
source: manchestereveningnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
↑↑↓→→↑↓↑→→→→→→
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Norgren told authorities he was a Sasquatch from a family of Sasquatches. The appellate judges said that's enough to show he had a break from reality, and his waiver of Miranda rights was not knowing and intelligent
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Former police officer admits to viewing pictures of naked women while on duty. "He was doing research." That's what they all say
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
♫ He didn't start the fire ♫
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat August 05, 2017
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Let's see, we've been evacuated from home for weeks due forest fires. How to celebrate coming home...I know, FIREWORKS
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Valley News Live)
 
 
 
Here's a shocker. Things are so bad in Brownbackistan that they can't even spell the words "state" or "university" correctly
source: valleynewslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Portland Mercury)
 
 
 
Even the most liberal of cities have turned fascist in 'Murica
source: portlandmercury.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Your Moscow Mule may be killing you
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bearing Arms)
 
 
 
Brave Texas professor protests Texas' campus-carry laws by wearing a bulletproof vest and Army helmet to class
source: bearingarms.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this grease gun
source: parktool.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ever found stuff in your new home left there by past tenants? Newspapers? Old pictures? Ok. How about snakes?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
"Dear NASA, I would like to apply for the position of Planetary Protection Officer. I think I would be fit for the job. One of the reasons is my sister says I am an alien. Also, I have seen almost all the space movies and alien movies I can see"
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
"Generation X needs to save America from Millennials." Yeah, just like the Greatest Generation saved America from the Baby Boomers, right?
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
What are the downsides to the job?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
The Associated Press' weekly roundup of fake news stories, which of course is just an attempt to divert attention from the AP's own fake news stories. You can't fool subby, AP libtards
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Mexico)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pyrrha... This phyrahux.... Screw it, photoshop this desert cardinal
source: d2fbmjy3x0sdua.cloudfront.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Valley News Live)
 
 
 
What's the weirdest thing you've ever put in a safety deposit box? If it beats a dead cat, a loaf of bread and a rock, you win
source: valleynewslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Aug 4th was International Beer Day. Site lists the best beers from over 100 countries. This is a day late because Drew was checking each one personally
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
'Old Ironsides' is once again afloat. This is not a repeat from 1812
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Woman buys vacant lot at city auction. Lot turns out to be a city street. City offers her full refund. Woman declines and demands full market value
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Oh...HIGH heels. Now I get the joke
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(How Stuff Works)
 
 
 
If you plan on driving to a better location to see the upcoming solar eclipse, you might to leave a bit early to avoid expected traffic jams. How early? Oh, about two weeks ago
source: auto.howstuffworks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
With the steaming pile of cinematic fail that is the new "Dark Tower" movie fresh in mind, the Saturday Morning Book Club wants to know when you think Hollywood got it right with a film adaptation
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Liverpool Echo)
 
 
 
Naked man horrifies McDonald's customers. Then things get weird
source: liverpoolecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(North Jersey)
 
 
 
Huge rolls of bubble wrap on the highway do not make for cushy commute
source: northjersey.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
And to think some people have a problem with pineapple on pizza - wait until they hear about this new monstrosity
source: standard.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Federalist)
 
 
 
You used to be cool, America, but now that everyone has a tattoo, it's becoming a problem
source: thefederalist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Can you hear me now?"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this former mailman and his delivery vehicle
source: media3.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
No
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Genie has been honored with the title of 'Cat of the Year' after comforting and caring for her 11 year old person who underwent several operations and chemotherapy while battling bone cancer. F*ck cancer, long live Caturday (and this brave girl)
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Today)
 
 
 
Capri pants deemed inappropriate teacher's attire because DAT ANKLE
source: today.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fresno Bee)
 
 
 
Rep. Tom McClintock (R-Wrong) lays the blame for massive wildfire where it belongs: Environmentalists
source: fresnobee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Dating a curvy woman does not make you a nice guy or a hero
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(GSA Auctions)
 
 
 
Need some new transportation and think cars, trucks, and bikes are too mundane? How about a dirigible
source: gsaauctions.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
How bad is the air quality in central British Columbia thanks to the wildfires? Kamloops scores an Air Quality Health Index of 49... on a scale of 1 to 10
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"Wrong turn" kills Grand Canyon hiker. Yeah, you don't want to take a wrong turn in the Grand Canyon
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri August 04, 2017
(CNN)
 
 
 
A pastor, a state trooper and a convicted sex offender walk into a police station...because they were some of the more than 1,000 people arrested this month as part of a nationwide sex-trafficking sting
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Okay, first question: how did he get them on top of his car?
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
There were two Martin Shkrelis who appeared in the same courtroom before the same judge this week and both were convicted
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Perhaps leading the police on a 120mph chase is not the best decision when driving a Volkswagen Scirocco
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Japanese chicken take-out chain offers a variety of different sauce flavors like soy, BBQ, ranch dressing, human sweat, honey muWAIT WHAT?
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
PS Battle: What's he so interested in?
source: i.cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
On the mean streets of Seattle, there can be only one way to clean up crime. And since this is Seattle, that way is 'send in more Starbucks'
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Woman dying of pancreatic cancer in VA: I'd really love a last mocha milkshake from my favorite restaurant. In Cleveland. Woman's friend, Restaurant Owner, and UPS: challenge accepted
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKRN Nashville)
 
 
 
We're not going to use those brand new Ford police interceptor SUVs, until we ensure that they're safe. Because, one of our officers smelled carbon monoxide. Ya know, that odorless and tasteless gas
source: wkrn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Man dumps body in horrendous act, then gets horrendous food at Applebee's
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hyperallergic)
 
 
 
Canadian Catholic snowflakes outraged by demonic giant robot spider climbing all over their cathedral
source: hyperallergic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Good news: Man released two years ago after serving 30 years for two murders he did not commit. Better: Alabama Senate committee unanimously approves $1.5 million compensation. Bad: full Senate fails to approve payout before going on vacation
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Aliens may be deterring nocturnal pollinators. With helpful picture of possible alien spacecraft
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop these fireworks
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Syria prepares for 72 hour ceasefire. Oh, wait, sorry. *Baltimore* prepares for 72 hour ceasefire
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Indy Channel)
 
 
 
Tanker truck goes over bridge and POOP THREAD!
source: theindychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
It's like a year's worth of "after school specials" about bad life choices crammed into a single headline: "Principal-turned-stripper gets 32 years for killing cop in DUI"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
NewsFlash
 
Pharma Bro guilty of 2 counts securities fraud, 1 count conspiracy to commit securities fraud, and 1 count of having an incredibly punchable face
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
The DEVAST8 tattoo guy decides not to remove any more of the tattoo because he now has a job as a "chicken chaser" and "the chickens don't care about my face"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
You mean that it's not okay to drag your wheelchair-bound friend behind your car?
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Dayton News)
 
 
 
Woman moves into apartment that had previously been rented to tenant with same last name. Hilarity ensues
source: mydaytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Comedian: "What, you're gonna heckle me? I don't go to where you work, jump up and down on the beds and slap the Funyons out of your . . . Funyons. Oh my god I want Funyons right now. Where am I again?"
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
Man charged in third murder says he has a hard time being rejected
source: palmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
Study shows your first name may change your physical and perceived appearance. This explains why Chads are such Chads
source: lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Caption what Catwoman is saying to this cat
source: orig00.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
The NYPD is threatening to boycott Dunkin' Donuts. Not everybody runs on Dunkin, apparently
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Coastie)
 
 
 
Happy 227th Birthday to the United States Coast Guard. And while it's confusing for all the other Armed Services to read 14 U.S. Code 1, if they could read, they would have joined the Coast Guard
source: uscg.mil   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Trolls collectively hijack white power website discussion groups to have candid conversations about color swatches
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
First of all, don't sexually abuse kids. Also, don't text people about it about if you do. And if you do text people about it, don't do it in a supersized font. On an airplane. In front of the woman who's taking pictures of your screen as evidence
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Voice of America)
 
 
 
Photoshop this PC user
source: gdb.voanews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
After learning a student had been bullied by his classmates and dreaded his return to school, a group of over 50 bikers gave him a special escort to his first day of 6th grade
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Seattle's air quality is worse than Beijing
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Santa Clarita Valley Signal)
 
 
 
Teenage joker's wave of social media pranks curtailed after he's hauled in by COBRA, because Knowing is half the battle
source: signalscv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
"Fill the potholes," they said
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
This mysterious military spy plane has been flying in circles over Seattle for days
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
Sewage sprayed on luggage of 380 passengers in Nashville Airport. Hope you had clean underwear in your carry on
source: 1075theriver.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
An incident involving a red-haired girl and a cucumber escalates into assault on a police officer
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu August 03, 2017
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
If you're going to steal 7-Eleven hot dogs that have been rolling for a week, don't post the video on social media
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Christians are nearly twice as likely to think people are poor because they don't work hard enough. You don't think Jesus just had heaven and earth handed to him by his dad, do you?
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
♫ Start spreading the news / I'm leaving today / I want to be a part of it, New York, New York ♫ (not safe for work audio so keep the volume down)
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FL Keys News)
 
 
 
For sale: Waterfront home. Quiet neighborhood in exclusive area
source: flkeysnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WNYC)
 
 
 
Drew Curtis says the rents in Newark, NJ are too damn high in the gentrifying city. Silent on the price of beer
source: wnyc.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
Do not have sex with a minor. If you have sex with a minor, do not secretly record it. If you secretly record it, do not share it with her best friend who will post it online. Also, do not have sex with a minor
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Here's just how close that Air Canada jet came to slamming into four other planes
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Edge (Ireland))
 
 
 
Protip for women (and some men): Never apply fake eyelashes without wearing your glasses, you might just be gluing a dead fly to your eye
source: dailyedge.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Reefer madness strikes Dallas Area Rabid Transit
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Noseless man who swam across river while high on meth pleads guilty to assaulting the police officer who rescued him. Why yes, this did happen in Saskatoon, how did you guess?
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
Video
 
Number of rhinos running on the road: 1, number of farks to give: 0
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Heavy)
 
 
 
All those years of education as a bubonic plague expert are wasted when you just stab the guy
source: heavy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this little girl in her police car
source: desplainesvalleynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
I'll give you one guess as to which country has a penguin shaped enema mascot
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
For the first time in it's 381 year history, by .8%, "non-whites" will make up the majority of the incoming freshman class at Harvard University. When, oh when, will Attorney General Sessions deliver my people from this cruel yoke of adversity?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
NewsFlash
 
Torch Tower catches fire in Dubai. Well ... yeah, I guess it would
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
Now you know why they were always after his Lucky Charms
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Girl who pushed her boyfriend to kill himself will be limited to just killing time for 15 months
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
More and more Maine women are getting into lobster catching. Well, if that's what the kids are calling it these days
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Cops recover car stolen from couple in their 80s, tell them it's being held for "evidence," then try to auction it. Too bad we don't arrest criminals like that in this country
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Homeowners' association tells vet to take down his flag wrap mailbox decor. Stupidity of HOA v.s Vet fight to the left, and a polite discussion of Chapter 1 of Title 4 of the United States Code to the right
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
To save space, CNBC kept this article to just three reasons why millennials want to work at tech companies instead of stodgy conglomerates
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Epicurious)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: When you're looking at all the different cuts of meat, do you know which cuts fit what you'd like to make? Need a primer on how to handle different cuts? Step into today's Fark Butcher Shop. Bonus: share your best roast recipe
source: epicurious.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
Boomer parents: 'One day, this will all be yours.' Grown children: 'Noooo!'
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida man threatens to stick Home Depot employee with needle, surprising police with his ability to find an actual Home Depot employee
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bird call
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
In Denmark, Game of Thrones isn't fantasy. And if this gets greenlit, someone will probably link the garish mausoleum he refuses to be buried in
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post Canada)
 
 
 
It's so hot in Canada, the electricity is catching on fire
source: huffingtonpost.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 12 Westchester)
 
 
 
The Emoji Movie may be the worst-reviewed movie of the year, but not everyone is having a bad reaction from seeing it
source: newjersey.news12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
I see your Woman on racist, vitriolic rant in the middle of a Target, throwing merchandise and dropping f-bombs, and raise you a Cray Cray in Chick-fil-A customer tossing condiments and table vases. Wait. They have table vases at Chick-fil-A?
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Yes, you can die from drinking boiling water on a dare
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
73-year-old-dude handing out "Sugardaddy seeking his sugarbaby" business cards with contact info to underage girls on the beach "devastated" that people took it the wrong way
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
"Good afternoon, we'll be landing in Montreal rather than Toronto because the shiatter's full. Air Canada apologizes for the inconvenience"
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda Report)
 
 
 
President of Turkmenistan comes to military drills dressed as Arnold Schwarzenegger in his 1985 classic "Commando"
source: pravdareport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Fifty years ago this month, a pair of grizzly bears killed two idiots at a national park and that's why you have to carry all your trash now
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oldham Chronicle (UK))
 
 
 
Massive Dolly Parton fan buys lifesize fake cow with proceeds of betting win. Don't worry, his fiancee is used to this sort of thing now after he bought the full size silver Lion King throne
source: oldham-chronicle.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
"I don't know that we'll ever go back to the Outer Banks," she said. "It kind of puts a salty taste in your mouth." That's why you should have him eat some pineapple first
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Guy decides to graverob grandma. James enlists his friend "Tea Jay" in the vile act. The two were caught having failed to break into the coffin. The two weren't even sure if grandma had any valuables. God bless America
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Root)
 
 
 
Woman goes on racist, vitriolic rant in the middle of a Target, throwing merchandise and dropping f-bombs as if she were in a Walmart
source: theroot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop this glowing blue ball
source: orig01.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Impersonate Trump while singing in a British punk band on tour in Germany, and then try to go to the USA? You better believe that's a deporting. Where is your First Amendment God now? (Complete with video of Punk Trump)
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Salus populi suprema lex esto. Excipi poterit adhibere
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
What better way to appreciate the awesome majesty of a total solar eclipse than a mall-sponsored one-minute fireworks show when it gets really dark
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
He went to Jared with his subpoena
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin News KXAN)
 
 
 
Bioterrorism response drill was going along swimmingly... until someone used the V-word in a Facebook post about it
source: kxan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Lawsuit alleges Nebraska patrol requires female applicants to undergo vaginal exam. Well yeah, it's a public cervix job
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Hope you're not planning to visit Pyongyang this fall
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
DNA in human embryos successfully edited for the first time. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 639: "Fire Hydrants". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed August 02, 2017
(KGUN 9 Tucson)
 
 
 
Arizona calls this newly discovered native creature a Nope-ion
source: kgun9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Trainspotting generation at most risk of dying from overdoses, Oasis ear poisoning
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBIR Knoxville)
 
 
 
Somehow, I don't think you thought your cunning plan all the way through
source: wbir.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Not news: Man carjacks woman. Fark: He has to get her help because he couldn't figure out the push button ignition
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Unaware of what happened on Good Friday 1964, a new study claims Alaska is at risk of a massive earthquake and tsunami
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Dayton News)
 
 
 
Judge tosses evidence after camera records cops brainstorming story to justify traffic stop
source: mydaytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Torn from the front page of the Bangor Daily News: I made one very big mistake during my day as a bloodwormer
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Guy breaks into house, strips, tries to get into shower with woman, and failing at that, goes and does the dishes instead
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Secret spy radio station, that no one admits operating, still transmits from somewhere inside Russia. Set your shortwave radio to 4625 kHz and your Putin Magic Decider badge to "A=A" and copy the secret message sent by Vlad, himself
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Like a good neighbor, stay over there
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It was a dark and stormy night, and then the murders began. This is your Fark Writer's Thread, "OMG I'm late and have to make up something fast" edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Residents complain because guests at hotel next door keep having sex in view of their homes
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Voice of San Diego)
 
 
 
Cop lies about catching homeless man sleeping in his truck. Tag is for the cop who forgot his body cam recorded the whole encounter
source: voiceofsandiego.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Michigan resort, with its own city council and police force, is being sued for enforcing a charter that only allows practicing Christians (with a strict limit on Catholics) to own property there. Hey, at least they got rid of the "whites only" part
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida woman's attempted recreation of Das Boot interrupted by workers
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop what time it is
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
Crematory had one job to do. Didn't
source: cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Jesus is watching you. Really
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRTV Great Falls)
 
 
 
You find a set of keys outside a car dealership. You turn them in, expecting a reward, but they refuse. The logical thing to do is A) shrug it off and be on your way, B) call them cheap bastards, or C) punch one of their cars and smear feces on it
source: krtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Beware condo owners - your building may not allow you to charge your own electric car
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda Report)
 
 
 
Drunk man punches Russian journalist in the face on the air
source: pravdareport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
You just might have a bedbug infestation if they have to bring in a hazmat team to hose down firefighters after they respond to a call at your house
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MPR News)
 
NewsFlash
 
Minnehaha not so funny right now
source: mprnews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
How to make a Frosé, this summer's trendy drink, at home. Step one: Abandon all self respect
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
What'd you catch fishing today? Oh, nuthin' just an eagle
source: outthere.bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
In the wake of video showing officers planting evidence, Baltimore is having to dismiss dozens of felony cases. Bonus: There's another video of different cops planting evidence
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
What are the chances of breaking a dozen double yolk eggs in a row? Better than you think
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these award winning buns
source: i.ytimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Chris Christie says heckler is lucky he didn't spill his nachos on him, as if Christie would willingly part with nachos
source: articles.nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Good cinderblocks make good neighbors
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Philadelphia police search for baby formula thief wearing Cowboys hat because that is a crime in Pennsylvania. Everybody knows you gotta wear a Pirates hat, a Phillies Hat, a Stillers Hat. But never a Cowboys hat
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
First sexually transmitted case of Zika detected in Florida. See, this is why you don't have sex with mosquitos
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 96.5 Florida)
 
 
 
Orlando airport employees fired for 'throwing luggage' video
source: news965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Two words: "Beer Mansion "
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
'Cash me outside' girl cashed again
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Seven priests walk into a bar...
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "Older people dying on job at higher rate than all workers." Analysis: No Shiat
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Norwegian anti-immigration group posts picture on their Facebook page of bus full of scary Muslim women wearing veils, but are actually just bus seats. Allah Akbus
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Mom almost goes blind from holy water, which seems counter to all the holy water stories subby has heard previously
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
In case you were still on the fence about cable companies being evil
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Joey, do you like gladiator movies? Ever seen a grown man naked? Wanna fly the plane?
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Plane lands, passengers opens door and exits. Everybody in the universe has a problem with this
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
1) Preheat oven to 110 degrees. 2) Season long pig with salt and pepper 3) Stuff long pig into aluminum foil tube (pack tightly) 4) Add cup of water occasionally 5) Simmer for six hours
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
U.S. citizen mistakenly detained by ICE and held for three years is awarded $82,000, but because the statute of limitations ran out while he was in custody, he won't get a dime
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this inquisitive golfer
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Consumer Product Safety)
 
 
 
Liquid-filled iPhone cases recalled for causing chemical burns and permanent scarring. What liquid is used in the cases? That's none of your business
source: cpsc.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Your everything guide to visiting the Eiffel Tower. Step 1: plan a real vacation somewhere interesting
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Coventry Telegraph)
 
 
 
One of the last surviving Spitfire pilots dies at age 99. He was walking around and doing interviews and telling corny old jokes until the very end. May we all go out like this guy
source: coventrytelegraph.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
900-year-old human remains uncovered in Ohio. Surprisingly, not your mom
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
"Sexiest motorcyclist" has sexiest crash
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
How can we stop the worst drug overdose crisis in American history?
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Just in case you thought anti-vaxxers couldn't get more mentally deficient, an increasing number of them in Brooklyn are refusing to vaccinate their dogs for the fear the dogs might get autism
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue August 01, 2017
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Cook County retailers appeal the ruling on the area's pop tax
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Edinburgh's new outdoor concert arena will look like a giant hobbit house
source: scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Defense One)
 
 
 
Next Air Force One to be second hand 747 from bankrupt Russian airline. Unlikely tag last seen taking a toaster into the bathroom
source: defenseone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Newborn calf wants to rock-n-roll all night and party every day
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(41 Action News)
 
Weeners
 
I hollered, "Don't look, Ethel," but it was too late. She'd already been mooned. Flashed her right there in front of the shock absorbers
source: kshb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Searchers have climbed the highest mountains, run through the fields, but they still haven't found what they're looking for
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chronicle Herald)
 
 
 
This is exactly why we have "stand your ground" and "castle doctrine" laws in some states in the U.S.
source: thechronicleherald.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Coed)
 
 
 
FSU once again makes the Top Party School top 10 list, but falls from #1 to #5. Tulane too drunk to yell, "We're Number One"
source: niche.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
McDonalds employee(s) "accidentally" put a piece of bacon on a chicken sandwich ordered by a Muslim family. All 14 sandwiches
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
August 1st is National Girlfriends' Day. Take your hand to lunch
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC4i)
 
 
 
Man arrested after trail camera catches him having sex with donkeys
source: nbc4i.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop these dancers
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
"Ladies and Gentlemen, update from the flight deck. That 'whoosh' sound you may have heard was the North Korean ICBM that just detonated a few minutes behind us"
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Guatemalan hibachi chefs in my Japanese steakhouse? It's more likely than you think
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
"It started with a fight over a hedgehog. It ended with a Greenacres man pushing a wheelchair with a baseball bat and a machete"
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSAZ West Virginia)
 
 
 
Ohio man gets new girlfriend who's cool with having his ex around. Really cool
source: wsaz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
World's biggest urinal is very crowded
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Man who blew up McDonald's bathroom not cooperating with police. Reportedly will only say "For God's sake, get me some toilet paper"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Recordings made by Princess Diana chronicle her 'odd' sex life with Prince Charles
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
"Nobody can put a price on a human life". Well this drug company thinks you CAN and they've pegged it at about 3/4 of a million dollars per year
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Good news everyone: Boobs are back. Apparently they went somewhere
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wordpress)
 
 
 
Photoshop this 'shroom somewhere interesting
source: sgmblogdotorg.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HelenaIR.com)
 
 
 
Woman swims the 28-mile length of the largest freshwater lake in the western U.S., decides it wasn't so tough, swims back
source: helenair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
A modern update on a popular Tennessee tradition, the shotgun wedding
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Blue Angels practice expected to impact I-90. Man, talk about low expectations
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Is your partner's throat a "silent reservoir" for the transmission of super-gonorrhea?
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
Washington Examiner runs free ad for porn site featuring The Mooch
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
If you're planning a trip to Times Square, keep in mind that it's been taken over by hordes of bare-breasted, pan-handling, lewd-talking, family-targeting illegal alien immigrants. OOGA BOOGA
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Should have asked for the 12-inch pianist instead
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Seems like the War on Thanksgiving starts earlier every year
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Just a little reminder for all your GoT fans pining for a Dany/Jon Snow romance: She's his aunt
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Airport security confiscate object from passenger and let him go. Only later do they realize it's a viable pipe bomb
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Meth mother killed her daughter, 6, with a shotgun 'to protect her from aliens'
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
V-8 Mustangs now come with a 'good neighbor mode' to limit exhaust noise. Fark: after a senior designer narrowly avoided a ticket for revving his up after midnight
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
This is your captain speaking. Apologies for the turbulence, but we are just beginning our approach to Atarturk airport...I think
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
"Highly unusual" North Korea submarine activity has been detected. Presumably the submarines managed to come up for air, baffling intelligence experts who are impressed that you can survive in a sub with a screen door attached
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop these lights
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Edge (Ireland))
 
 
 
Pint Baby returns to the Clare pub where he had that famous Guinness 20 years ago. To have another pint, of course
source: dailyedge.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Inmates used peanut butter to escape Alabama jail
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Large, odd, white glow slowly moves across the George Washington Bridge
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Drivers are advised to remain in place until the ferry is fully docked
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Alaska town had a police force of three officers and a police chief up until two of the officers who are married to each other resigned to deal with personal issues, the third officer moved away, and the chief went to Scotland for a long vacation
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Scientists discover a second ocean garbage patch - this time in the southern Pacific ocean
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Who farted, y'all?
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
South Korea plans "surgical strike" against the North
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 31, 2017
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Book "How I made $290,000 selling books" by Jack Stratton now available on Amazon...for $290,000 (only 1 left in stock)
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
$590,000 worth of iPhones stolen from a moving truck. Apple has blocked the full dozen IMEI numbers
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LEO Affairs)
 
 
 
Cop vs. Cop, who wins?
source: leoaffairs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
A still-unsolved murder mystery involving fake Somali pirates and the hijacking of an oil tanker
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Like to blow through red lights on your motorcycle? Here's your sign
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Four inmates on the loose after Alabama jailbreak. No word on when their country song will be released
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Good four-year-old with gun stops bad four-year-old with gun. Well, he was being bad when he picked it up, anyway
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Priebus goes where?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
So, a dog in wolf's clothing? That's new
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Don't start throwing the legalization parties yet. According to Colorado officials, marijuana isn't just a gateway drug, it's a gateway drug for homicide
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this hoopy light fixture thingie
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
For the love of Christ, WWE has trademarked the term "3:16"
source: uproxx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
So you know your uncle Peter died in a house fire? Well about that
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
At 8PM EDT, Paul's Memory Bank will 'tee up' 2 more hours of songs beginning with the letter "T". The end of the swing through the alphabet is almost in sight. The DJ is actually going to have to think of topics soon
source: beta.tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
Millennials won't be happy until they've destroyed everything
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this firefighting plane
source: cdn2.spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Joe Arpaio is contemptible
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Heat wave set to hit Seattle. Forecasters warn of record levels of wilted flannel
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
You know the bee shortage is real when there's a black market for stolen bees
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
NewsFlash
 
♫ Scaramouche, Scaramouche you can't do the Trump fandango ♫
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Deputies searching for man who blew up McDonald's bathroom, fear he may be armed and extremely flatulent
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
James Bond can drink and then drive a submersible car into the sea. You, sir, are no James Bond, and your car is not a Lotus submarine
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Times of India)
 
 
 
Politicians accused of encouraging cow vigilantism. Sadly, this does not involve a cow being the hero that Hindustan deserves or needs
source: timesofindia.indiatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WREG Memphis)
 
 
 
Boat captain rescues 'Miracle' cat thrown off bridge. Cat vows to slowly consume the soul of the person who threw her
source: wreg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2017-07-23 to Sat 2017-07-29
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
The hunt continues for a reliable DUI test that can measure how many marijuanas you've had
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
*UNZ UNZ UNZ UNZ* *wee ooo* *UNZ UNZ UNZ UNZ* *WEE OOO WEE OOO WEE OOO WEE OOO*
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Samantha Bee: Work less if you want to be more productive. If you're reading this headline right now, then you're already off to a great start
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Video emerges of man trying to withdraw money from bridge railing. "It's believed that the man had been drinking"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Narcan used to save dog who accidentally ate 25 oxycodone pills
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
French airport worker punches passenger holding a baby. Your move, United
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Pyongyang's 'Hotel of Doom' reopens after best renovation with big red propaganda sign declaring that North Korea is a leading rocket power. All hail the world's tallest unoccupied building
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Elite Hamptonites fearful their town could become "the Appalachia of the Hamptons" because of the rise of squalid motels for local poor workers
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
The Outer Banks debacle gets worse, as all three electrical lines that serve the area have been damaged or compromised
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this archer
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
Elementary school teacher invites entire class to participate in her wedding, saves a fortune on the reception bar tab
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Couple spots grass fire, calls 9-1-1, and then remembers they're in a 1,000HP jet boat. Sploosh
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Insurance companies; "Pay your damn insurance bills, it's the law." Trump: "Might let things implode so NO." Courts: "Now wait a minute there, scofflaw"
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fresno Bee)
 
 
 
Hot dog eating champ converts and becomes taco eating champ. Surprisingly, not a story about your mom
source: fresnobee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Dear Deidre, While my wife was in the hospital on life support I started having hot sex with my mother-in-law and... sorry, subby has to go barf. Just click to the left (Not safe for work)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
One in eight youths have never seen a cow
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Later this week the forecast calls for a high of 106 in what Western city? A) Phoenix B) Las Vegas C) Portland
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Palmer Report)
 
 
 
Mike Huckabee insults dead Norwegians and all of America in a single tweet. Well done, dickhead
source: palmerreport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Man shoots himself in head at firing range. Range owners need members like that like they need...something
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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