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Sun March 26, 2017
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
People with absolutely nothing to do in life plan to ban people walking six dogs at once
source: standard.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
No matter what your feelings are regarding monster trucks, THAT was cool
source: truckyeah.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Here's a handy guide to how many books you have time to read in what's left of your lifetime
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Hold my beer and watch this
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Masturbating in stranger's backyards is no way to go through life, Detective
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Channel)
 
 
 
On this day in 1953, Jonas Salk announces the polio vaccine, eventually saving millions of lives, but still leaving anti-vax-ers paralyzed
source: history.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lil' wall climber kid
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Marijuana operation goes up in flames. Firefighters and police rush to the scene to secure area downwind
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Currahee)
 
 
 
Don Burgett, who survived fighting from Normandy to Berchtesgaden with the 101st Airborne and wrote four books from the trooper's POV, has passed away just before his 92nd birthday
source: whmi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
The story of the only food Nebraska can ever truly say it created: the disgusting, cabbage-filled nightmare known as The Runza
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
You put one screwdriver into a painting at the National Gallery and people lose it. Wait. It was one of those sappy 18th-century British romantic paintings? Not saying I condone it, but I get it
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Girls forced to change their leggings in order to be able to fly United. Scotsmen still okay to board in kilts, though
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Entire coffee world turned upside down as espresso with tonic water is the latest bizarre coffee trend
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
What would happen if ISIS members learned their preferred text of the Koran was actually translated by American women?
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger road collapse road collapse
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Badger)
 
 
 
Photoshop this shady situation
source: fan-place.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Maryland to consider cracking down on those worthless asshats who cruise in the left lane without yielding to faster traffic. No word on plans to crack down on them for being Maryland drivers
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring banana crack
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
You know what they say: The couple that keeps 1.25 million bugs in their home together, stays together
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Popchips Guy)
 
 
 
This week, Snack Food Sunday wants its chips and health food, too. So, what are your favorite "healthy" chips?
source: eatthis.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Can't sleep? Call this number for a menu of weird, sleep inducing sounds, including "grandma who misses you," "history of the cocktail wiener," and "Steve Urkel singing you a lullaby"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Bad: You live in Detroit. Worse: Broken sewer line creates sinkhole near your home. Fark: The city condemns your house and demolishes it
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Performing classical music with two handguns. Take a shot. it's pretty cool
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
The 2017 winner of the European Tree of the Year award is a Polish tree named the Oak Józef. This is not a joke
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Statesman)
 
 
 
27 mistakes on the cover of one edition of the Daily Mail. Farkers shrug, say they can find another 142 mistakes, not counting its readers
source: newstatesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
If you like to use the self-checkout line it's because you're an introvert who will go to great lengths to avoid interacting with fellow humans
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ArcaMax)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pretzel logic
source: arcamax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: April Fool's Day Pranks
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The Queen's Guardsmen usually don't react to dumb tourists. Usually
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
You know what America hasn't had in awhile? A mass shooting at a night club. Cincinnati: Challenge accepted
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Remember when California emissions was an extra cost line item on the window sticker?
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Venture Beat)
 
 
 
If a Uber car crashes in the desert, but there's no one driving it, does it make a lawsuit?
source: venturebeat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Tribune)
 
 
 
Fire Chief annoyed at mayor of neighboring city who posted lawyer's fatal housefire was the work of a Gypsy hit squad
source: dailytribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Is polyamory becoming culturally accepted?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Muslim woman on bridge during Westminster attack speaks out after becoming target of Islamophobic bigots
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
So, what did people do for fun before air conditioning? How about the New York rooftop theater craze back in the early 1900s with its acrobats and vaudeville entertainment
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 25, 2017
(Thrillist)
 
 
 
The 21 best secret bars in the world to host your next Fark party at
source: thrillist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
A swanky multi-billion dollar international airport built and finished five years ago that has yet to have any flights? It's more likely than you think
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
DAMMIT ...do you like pulp in your orange juice or not? This is important
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(660 News Calgary)
 
 
 
Photoshop this life imitating art
source: 660news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Embarrassing: Being caught stealing a bag full of panties from a department store. Really embarrassing: You're a guy. Fark: Caught by your own daughter
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Tennessee DOT bills 17-year-old $3,000 to repair guardrail that killed her. BRILLIANT
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Within 15 years, robots will steal 38% of U.S. jobs and your spouse because their entire bodies vibrate
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
On her upbringing, Rachel Dolezal says "I was born a poor black child with no concept of light, so blacker than space and everyone else incidentally"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOB4)
 
 
 
What do you say to the guy who stole a handgun out of your unlocked car? The same thing you said after each of the first three times he stole a handgun out of your unlocked car
source: kob.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TownNews)
 
 
 
Photoshop this guy who is a little tied up at the moment
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
There's no reason to become alarmed and we hope you enjoy the rest of your ride. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to drive a boat?
source: bc.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you ever wanted to live in a $7.8 million recreation of Camelot in suburban Kansas City, well... now's your chance
source: reecenichols.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
11-year-old served with three no trespass orders for cutting through neighbors' yards to get to her bus stop
source: capecodtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
I'm proposing enslaving old ladies at nursing homes to knit microwave cozies to protect against the NSA cameras. In the meantime, it's the Fark Weekly Weird News Quiz
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
"A man the city of Deerfield Beach hired for plumbing services in 2012 has been fined $12,000 for not being a real plumber"
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Armed robbery of Rolex store inside the Bellagio Casino leads to brothers-in-law suddenly nervous about their tractor dealerships
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
When stealing guns, a PlayStation, cash and other items from a home you might want to take a second to make sure you are taking everything that you came in with. Unless, of course you want to play Cinderella with the police
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Man hides in Sears store after closing and tries to steal $830,000 in jewels. In even more surprising news, there was a Sears store with $830,000 in jewels
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
Fun fact: The 'baby teeth' you see in your barbacoa taco are actually beef lips. Bon appétit
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Giving your child a day-old, cold McDonald's Happy Meal to take to school for lunch? Expect a letter from the principal
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Behold this fully armed and operational Detroit
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kare11)
 
 
 
Wisconsin teen saves friend from dying in the most Wisconsin way possible
source: kare11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
120-foot-long escape tunnel found under Mexican prison. Which was, amazingly enough, surrounded by very tall walls. Well built walls, even. It's almost like this could be a metaphor for something
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIVI Boise)
 
 
 
Woman blames Bigfoot for car crash, with helpful pic of what Bigfoot might look like
source: kivitv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Will Philip Marlowe reign supreme over Prince Hamlet? Will Holden Caulfield make the cut or will he be done in by Elric of Melniboné? This week, the Saturday Morning Book Club is looking for the most intriguing literary antiheroes
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
"If you want to see how humans behave naturally, you don't go to a Manhattan high-rise or a vegan co-op or even a small farming village. You go to a hunter-gatherer community in the wilderness"
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Snack)
 
 
 
Photoshop this big mouth
source: gogetnews.info   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Why so serious
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 96.5 Florida)
 
 
 
Can you 'ear me now? The cute, it burns on Caturday
source: news965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Portland's police chief and Lieutenant Leasure are on leave for unspecific reasons. No, really, Lieutenant Leasure is a person's title and name
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
In today's Fark Madlibs headline: Naked demonstrators kill sheep in Auschwitz and play with fireworks
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Turns out, the London terrorist was an English teacher. House bill to outlaw NEA and purge academics expected next week
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 24, 2017
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Lost tourist is saved after nine days in the Amazon rainforest after monkeys dropped food to him from the trees and led him to water. It's a good thing he avoided the Whangdoodles, Hornswogglers, Snozzwangers and Vermicious Knids
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
When Mexico sends its runoff, they're not sending their best
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Hungary threatens to ban Heineken's red star as 'communist,' Comrade Drew unavailable for comment
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Q13 Fox)
 
 
 
Attempting to give Florida Man a run for his money, naked Washington Man gets tasered after setting house and car on fire. Amateur
source: q13fox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
UK court refuses to let wife divorce husband because "unhappiness is to be expected in marriage"
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pew Research)
 
 
 
The dreaded Baby Boomers have teamed up with the Silent Generation and are laying a vicious beatdown on GenX, but wait... Bah Gawd King, that's The Millennials' music, what are THEY doing here?
source: pewresearch.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
¿Dónde está Kermit?
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Guy hasn't cut his nails in 35 years. Has his wife bathe him and feed him. The fact he has a wife is the real shocker
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lonely guy, sitting on a tree stump, alone in the woods, reflecting on his thoughts, dreaming of what the world could become... or maybe he is just a douche
source: static01.nyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Florida man steals $138,000 from disabled woman, tries to launder money at a strip club
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
In this era of nothing-to-see-here, isn't it nice to know we used to treat kids as spies for requesting airplane pictures?
source: paleofuture.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Jewish center bomb caller caught because he forgot to hide behind 7 proxies. Shmendrik
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
Headline: It's harder than ever to apply for student aid; article: you have to manually enter the information
source: twocents.lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Reality show contestants spend a year in the Scottish wilderness unaware the show was cancelled
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Not news: Wuhan child welfare agency gives abandoned baby girl a name reminding her that the PRC considers its subjects to be its property. Fark: 20 years later, 50 couples think they may be her birth parents
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
New Jersey legislators pass the 'Snooki Bill' limiting speaking payments at public colleges to $10,000, after she was paid $2,000 more than Nobel Prize-winning author 5 years ago
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this curler
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
The internet has a theory on who the Zodiac killer is. Surprisingly, this one doesn't involve Ted Cruz
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Some headlines are made for Fark: Man wearing leopard print robe and Crocs used a hairbrush to rob McDonald's
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida man disrupts traffic to eat pancakes in roadway. Charged with Obstruction of Breakfast
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Man says he accidentally ran over his ex-wife. Four times
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Patton Oswalt delivers jokes from Mike Huckabee's Twitter feed, bombs spectacularly
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
This is for you, Jeff Sessions: A list of who's using marijuana in the Seattle area
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Trump lays pipe
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
How many cute little ducks have you killed by feeding them bread you evil duck-destroying monster?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
Can soundwave replace erectile dysfunction pills for men? Does Laserbeak record it?
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this protestor
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Fourth astronaut to walk on the moon knows we are not alone, explains why he thinks aliens haven't visited Earth yet
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jewish Daily Forward)
 
 
 
The Trump family has big phallic plans for 666 5th Ave
source: forward.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Chicago will lose $17 million in revenue by delaying their red light cameras by two tenths of a second. Actually, they could slow their cameras by 20 minutes and still catch red light runners stuck in the intersection
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
White supremacy spokesman: "White supremacy is a religion of peace." Sometimes, a single facepalm just ain't gonna cut it
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
In the old days, we called believing in something because your friend said it was true "argumentum ad verecundiam" and it was a logical fallacy. Today, we call it social networking, and it's worth billions of dollars and elects Presidents
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hamilton Spectator)
 
 
 
12-year-old boy carrying wooden sword and toy gun confronted by police in a public park. Guess how it ends (Hint: happened in Canada)
source: thespec.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Caption this picture of our President pretending to drive a big truck on the White House lawn
source: assets.nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
London attacker was born in Kent. Britain to be added to Trump's travel ban shortly
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
Ask a student to stand for the Pledge of Allegiance? That's a firing
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
🎶They un-paved a parking lot and put up paradise🎶
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Is there a dating site specifically for people that practice martial arts?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Okay, stay with me. Hookers allegedly turned a gay man straight. Wait, there's more. This claim comes from a "Christian consultant." WAIT, there's more. The hookers accomplished this feat not as you would expect, but with an anointed cake
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLOS 13 Asheville)
 
 
 
Some people just don't appreciate having domestic violence humor on a billboard
source: wlos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Dog saved from an abusive owner takes time out of licking her own ass to save a toddler's life
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 23, 2017
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Hey, it looks like you're designing a skyscraper. Would you like help?
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass capybaras give birth to three ugly-ass capy-babies. Ugly-ass
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KAIT Jonesboro)
 
 
 
Time for my yearly donation to Goodwill. Shirts? Check. Pants? Check. Loaded gun? Who wouldn't want a loaded gun in their pants, right?
source: kait8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Your phone, your remote, and even your reusable grocery bags are full of disgusting germs. Basically, you're gross and you should feel bad
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Faced with the U.S. laptop travel ban, Arab airlines are experiencing an explosion of snarky advertising
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Heat Street)
 
 
 
Let's check an early review of Rachel Dolezal's autobiography....ohhh lawd
source: heatst.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
If you tell state troopers in one different state that you are heading out of state to purchase heroin, shouldn't you be locked up so you don't do it again? Not if you do it in Connecticut
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Study shows most cancers are random, are unavoidable. Science to the left; calm, rational discussion on the right. Choose your side carefully
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
The most adorable pics of a toddler getting his first ride in a big rig that you'll see all year
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
MP Tobias Ellwood, who battled to save the life of stabbed policeman at Westminster, lost his own brother in the 2002 Bali terrorist bombings
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Grabher by the licence plate
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this baby manatee
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
First responders: When responding to report of elderly man wandering neighborhood shirtless, carrying catheter bag, take him to hospital. Don't just call him a cab, send him to wrong address 40 miles away
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Park honoring Franklin Roosevelt sued for not being handicap-accessible
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
"Ack, call 911, I've been struck by lightning." "Well, isn't this ironic"
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Boston)
 
 
 
College students rescued man from train tracks because God doesn't always protect fools, drunks, Fark headline submitters
source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Reagan to get balls bigger than the ones used to announce that the missiles to ensure peace with the USSR launch in five minutes during a radio broadcast
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
4 yr old: "Siri, set 4pm reminder for Wonder Pets, Check @Elmo on twitter, also save Mum's life"
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVM Columbus)
 
 
 
Waffle House: Come for the food, stay for the show
source: wtvm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Remember the Heaven's Gate mass suicides from twenty years ago? Well you can still buy the victims' discontinued Nike shoes if you're into that kind of a thing
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Photoshop this creepy cosplayer
source: img.buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Former Russian MP and critic of Putin trips and accidentally falls on some bullets, according to the Kremlin
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
4-year-old brings shell casing to daycare, therefore soccermom martial law is declared
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
A new "Hyperloop," if built, could connect Seattle and Portland in 15 minutes. Or two and a half hours if the TSA gets involved
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Good: NASA resolves data error in the Space Station's radiation sensors. Awesome: Thanks to the analysis of a 17-year-old student in Britain
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Dissecting Sir Mix-a-lot's magnum opus: 'I like big butts and I cannot lie' is a clear value proposition
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Today is national puppy day, so let's see them all-big puppies, little puppies, sweater puppies
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Fahrenheit 451. Now translated to Floridian
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Impossible Foods company intends to market a "veggie burger that bleeds". Next year, they will introduce carrots that scream
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Montana Standard)
 
 
 
Big Hole jammed (link fixed)
source: mtstandard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Arrest made in multiple threats to Jewish centers. Fark: suspect is a Jewish teenager in Israel
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Florida woman secretly records and broadcasts a nursing home couple having sex, claiming it was for her own amusement
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Since there isn't a single black man living in his city, a Baltimore man went to NYC last week just to stab black men to death
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Daesh takes credit for the Westminster attack, the quality of the CHIPs remake, and the new Yoko Ono album
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Willis Tower Skydeck expansion to allow visitors to rappel on the building's exterior from the Skydeck's top floor to the gift shop below where they can purchase new underwear
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Photoshop this examiner
source: fm.cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Record-breaking 76,017 domino 'circle bomb' toppled from the center of a circle to its outer edge
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Have an earworm of a song going round and round in your head? Here's how to extract it from your noggin
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Today's White House fence jumper caught by her shoelaces. Secret Service needs every break it can get
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KAIT Jonesboro)
 
 
 
Drug paraphernalia ✓ Meth ✓ Xanax ✓ Hydrocodone ✓ Being sold at a gas station ✓ Or as they call that in Arkansas just another day ending with the letter Y
source: kait8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Explosions at arms depot in eastern Ukraine force evacuation of 20,000 people. "Sabotage" suspected
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Springfield News-Leader)
 
 
 
Former university student arrested for breaking into a university laboratory and doing "medical research"
source: news-leader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
A couple put a bike in front of their house with a free sign on it. Then things get weird
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Asahi Shimbun)
 
 
 
Buddhist temple in Fukui holds techno music services to lure young worshipers, with chief priest rapping sutras as colorful lights swirl around Buddha statue. 'We priests are Buddha's public relations representatives'
source: asahi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 620: "Spring is in the Air 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 22, 2017
(Thrillist)
 
 
 
America's Hobo royalty have mastered the ultimate cheap travel hack: Just don't pay. For anything. Ever. Learn their ways
source: thrillist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Deadpool busted for DUI after driving onto Taco Bell lawn
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Don't feel bad about eating butter, it's not that bad for you. Delicious butter on everything is what life is all about
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global News (Canada))
 
Weeners
 
Doctor argues he is too fat to rub his erection against patients
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Meet the rocket scientist who became a pig farmer, with a possible signature meat called Blast-off Bacon in the works
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
State of Vermont announces data breach of personal information on some 200,000 people. Are there even 200,000 people in Vermont?
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
Need a ride home after checking yourself out of the hospital? Why not just steal an ambulance?
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
If you're planning on texting the details of your upcoming drug swap, it's probably best not to mistakenly send it to a local prosecutor
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
One simply does not tiptoe pass the customs officials into mainland China from Hong Kong with 1,000 diamonds in his shoes when he has a case of the walking blues
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
It's a tough economy when a burglar working the evening shift makes off with only $1 and a houseplant
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Delhi TV)
 
 
 
Apparently nuclear plants can get small pox
source: ndtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 17 Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
The first rule of doggy daycare fight club is don't talk about doggy daycare fight club
source: fox17online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this vision of beauty
source: napervillecounseling.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Ancient earthquakes prove that Otisburg is a potential reality
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Christian school principal suspends 12-year-old girl for selling kids' toys in class because the principal mistook them for sex toys. "In your wildest imaginations, no adult could possibly view this as a sex toy, this is a water-filled bag"
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
How about a Liter selfie thread? C'mon, Mods, make it happen
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Comet TV)
 
 
 
"1984" is returning to movie theaters for one night only for those of you who think the current real-life version lacks any substance
source: comettv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Rising polonium prices and a stagnant economy force Russians to use gravity poisoning to save rubles
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
The Sheriff is looking for a needle in a crate of needles
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSTU FOX 13)
 
 
 
It's now a crime to harass livestock with a drone in Utah, so change up those bachelor party plans
source: fox13now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Five-year-old accidentally packs her school lunchbox with a frozen vodak sorbet pouch after her mum told her to get a 'juice pouch' from the freezer. An 'accident' yeah, that's the ticket
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Do people keep telling you how much you look like Alexander the Great? No? Well, upload your head shot here and you may find your historic match, if it exists amongst the world's great statues
source: monsosie.mcq.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Now that we've reached the point where a degree in law has about as much value as one in art history, law schools are starting to rethink the LSAT
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this peaceful morning on the lake
source: d6d2h4gfvy8t8.cloudfront.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
How Alabama locks people up for life over nonviolent marijuana possession
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
High school anatomy teacher arrested for fulfilling job requirements
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
The Florida House of Representatives considers banning red-light cameras statewide, in a rare display of sanity and reason that makes up for at least three Florida headlines
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Opium-dependent parrots begin razing entire poppy plantations, stealing money to fuel the addiction, beating their wives and talking all sorts of shiat
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Fark ready headline: Maine man trying to kill ants accidentally sets house on fire, officials say
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Air Force man AWOL for forty years finally found living under a false name. On the bright side, think of all the back pay he's owed
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
American farmers are hacking their tractors with Ukrainian firmware because John Deere and other manufacturers have made it impossible to perform "unauthorized" repair on farm equipment
source: motherboard.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Time to play Sherlock Holmes. 2 teens killed. They were unloading and loading a semi-automatic handgun. FTA: both teens were holding the gun, it accidentally discharged hitting one teen. It then accidentally discharged again and hit the other teen
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
You're a serious parking violator when your tickets total 17 times the value of your car
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(41 Action News)
 
 
 
"There is activity at your front door. It appears to be the apocalypse"
source: kshb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
The Trump Tower...you'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Australia to remove 'gay panic' defense from criminal code. Now, a murderer can't claim they were simply scared because someone gay grabbed them down under
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chew Boom)
 
 
 
It's time to Mac America Saucy Again. McDonald's is selling Big Mac sauce as well as Filet-O-Fish, and McChicken sauces in grocery stores There's just one catch. Only in Canada
source: chewboom.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Inmate who beat up Jared Fogle now receiving tons of fan mail. "I am writing this letter to thank you for your service," said one little boy, who also sent $2
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Trump tries to shame Seattle and King County by putting them on his 'naughty' list, apparently forgetting that a city of people who worship the Seahawks probably can't be shamed by anything
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Dateline: March 22. You are feverishly trying to spit out a competent story for Heart of Farkness 2 when suddenly, your cat walks across your keyboard and submits the story. What do you do? You come here. THIS is your Fark Writers Thread
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Hooray for cheese: Scientists say eating it all day long won't kill you after all
source: studyfinds.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
NewsFlash
 
Police officer stabbed inside UK Parliament. Alleged assailant shot by armed police
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talk Radio (UK))
 
 
 
After 32 years, Arkansas finally realizes it's a bit weird to celebrate Martin Luther King on the same day as a southern Civil War general
source: talkradio.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Vatican reports brazen daylight theft of Pope's hat by... daaaaaw
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 96.5 Florida)
 
 
 
Zoo handlers chainsaw off the horns on 21 rhinos to keep poachers from chainsawing off the horns from 21 rhinos
source: news965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Pope Francis now going after blasphemous Fark headlines. No level of Hell declared yet for the Politics tab
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop the crater rim of the Kilauea caldera
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Donald Trump invokes David Chappelle's "If George Bush Were Black" strategy
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"Well, they are called MISSiles not HITTiles, amirite, Dear Leader?"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
There is no better way to scream for attention than to ride your horse through the aisles of a Walmart and then post video of it to your Facebook page
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Supermarket manager offers "plentiful pizza" in lieu of overtime pay. It goes over as well as you would expect
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
It's spring at Warm Springs Ranch, time for some new Clydesdale foals..Daaawwww
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
What do you call a Russian lawyer injured in a freak bathtub hoisting accident?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 21, 2017
(USA Today)
 
 
 
If you live in Seattle, Cincinnati, or Columbus, Alexa will now bring you a beer
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Space.com)
 
 
 
Mars Volcano died at same time as dinosaurs. In other news, Mars apparently had dinosaurs
source: space.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
Where to go if a nuke falls in your city, you know just in case you're not blind and still have all your skin after the apocalypse starts
source: lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
When you try to force a dairy to label its real milk as "imitation" milk, you might be a Florida
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The forbidden love of Tad and Elizabeth continues to be misunderstood. Next, on the Bold and the Beautiful and the Illegal
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Japanese funeral home offers elderly drivers a 15% discount if they stop endangering society
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
India declares the River Ganges is now legally a human being; they insist it's not because all the garbage and pollution has caused it to mutate and become self-aware
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Great Falls Tribune)
 
 
 
Insulin pump saves woman's life--when she uses it to escape trunk of car she's been kidnapped in
source: greatfallstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
The kid who crashed his mom's Charger near Mar-a-Lago is same kid who called CNN, pretended to be refugee
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Let's celebrate Yahoo's long life as Internet pioneer by remembering its longest-lasting contribution to society
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: What does Duke do?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
SIR DAVID ATTENBOROUGH: "And here we have an excellent specimen of Florida man, in his natural environment of the glare of television cameras, police sirens, and handcuffs"
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop our future Gastropoda overlords
source: d6d2h4gfvy8t8.cloudfront.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
You can't steal 22 liquor bottles from Walgreens. Thief: Hold my beer
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Australian police minister takes a funny picture of a sheep in a car, turns himself in after he was informed it was illegal to use his cell phone while driving
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 96.5 Florida)
 
 
 
Flight attendant wrestles 5-foot snake from plane; Samuel L. Jackson unimpressed
source: news965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Rule 36 strikes again: Family doctor's hip hop video urges safe sex for seniors
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
At this rate, future air travel security will necessitate flying naked, without luggage, anesthetized, and being revived at your destination. On the plus side, you'll never know you spent 9 hours next to a fat slob with B.O. that could kill a horse
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Caption these feasting guinea pigs
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Once again, people: Being racist, stupid, and on Facebook can be career limiting
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
Change your travel plans: sex with animals illegal in Ohio starting today
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Virginian-Pilot)
 
 
 
Oklahoma state senator found with underage male prostitute plans to resign, spend more time getting to the bottom of things
source: pilotonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Judge limits info on the trial of drug kingpin El Chapo, saying only that his name is Spanish for "The Chap"
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Unfortunate dude who decided to share a beer with Dylan Roof gets two years for lying to the FBI. Sometimes hanging out with lunatics is a bad thing
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
15-year-old drops acid, three stories
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Idaho State Journal)
 
 
 
After family dog is killed, an Idaho Sheriff asks the USDA to stop planting cyanide bombs across the county. In other news the USDA is planting cyanide bombs
source: idahostatejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this early morning hoopster
source: c2.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
$3.7 million restoration returns Jesus' tomb to its original splendor. Search for it with keywords "Jerusalem tourist trap"
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Daily News)
 
 
 
Broccoli and cabbage can help you live longer but they taste terrible. That's where lemon juice and cheese come in
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Women are spending tens of thousands of dollars on plastic surgery to get the "natural beauty" of Ivanka Trump. That's the joke
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
In today's episode of Canadian Problems; diplomats have been told to stop using life-size, cardboard cut-outs of Justin Trudeau at promotional events
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida woman arrested after toddler shoots out car window at church school. To be fair, in Florida, that's called doing a bang-up job of parenting
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Police claim woman not wearing gloves tried to shoot them without leaving any fingerprints or DNA on the gun. In a terrible coincidence, all six body cameras mysteriously failed at the same time
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fay Observer)
 
 
 
It bears repeating: If you insist on going to an unlicensed, trans-gender person's home to receive silicone injections, don't expect medical-grade silicone to be used
source: fayobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Best Korea says it's not afraid of US strike in statement describing their 'treasured sword of justice,' simultaneously ratcheting up the tension and giving World of Warcraft players a new reason to invade
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Vista support, Obama's tapping, and grammar Nazi judges. These are YOUR Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2017-03-12 to Sat 2017-03-18
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Think that flying a commercial airliner is an easy gig? Cockpit footage of a pilot battling turbulence and intense winds shows some serious skill that very few have
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Labrador retrievers are again #1 in America's most popular dog breeds, narrowly beating out German shepherds, golden retrievers and meth labs
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Operation March Sadness nets thirty-eight prostitutes, fifty-one johns, fourteen pimps and one award for 'the worst name for a prostitution sting ever'
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
China tortures lawyers. Rest of world issues statement of general approval
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
How can politicians really say they're making America great again when they keep trying to ban RV camping in Walmart parking lots?
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Infant mortality rates in the US plunge 15%
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
If you've got so much weed it's literally coming out your butt, maybe it's time to cut back
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Appeals court rules that pleading the 5th doesn't protect you from being forced to decrypt your hard drives if everyone already knows you've been downloading illegal materials to them in the first place
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flooded fuel stop
source: media1.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
In today's episode of 'Causation vs. Correlation' we have global warming and diabetes
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ArcaMax)
 
 
 
ICE pretends to be police, just like they pretend to serve justice
source: arcamax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
You know those packets of wildflower seeds Cheerios gave away to help grow flowers for honey bees? It turns out in some states the seeds are considered noxious, invasive, and illegal
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
In adult movies when your wife recently discovers that she's gay, things get kinky. In real life, bleach gets thrown in your face
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Prison guards won't face charges after boiling a man alive
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NOW Toronto)
 
 
 
Hermaphrodite frogs and feminized fish, as well as low sperm counts and reproductive problems in humans. Not my Toronto
source: nowtoronto.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Weird Asia News)
 
 
 
Chinese archaeologists baffled by newly discovered 2,000-year-old pyramid scheme
source: weirdasianews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The war on cannabis is more deadly than cannabis
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Me TV)
 
 
 
Hidden treasure of old candy wrappers and boxes found at historic Chicago movie theater in the midst of being renovated, for those of you wondering where your JuJuBes went missing in 1946
source: metv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 20, 2017
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Couple go into bar around midnight, order drinks. Woman passes out. Staff calls cab. Before cab arrives, woman vomits in front of bar, Man gets into fight with bar staff. Police arrive, arrest couple. Quick, where'd couple's 5-year-old daughter go?
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Cosby wants jury pool to be picked from Pittsburgh, prescreened for bias, Star Wars characters
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Wendy's: "Here's the beef"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Trace of Earth's original 4.3 billion-year-old crust found on surface. Pizza boxes still unaccounted for
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
This one weird trick is guaranteed to prevent the bank from foreclosing on your home
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Sharks and ill-tempered Sea Bass are out, but the army may soon have trucks with giant lasers on their heads
source: foxtrotalpha.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda Report)
 
 
 
Russia starts drawing pictures to build new aircraft carrier. The new one will be smoking too, to scare enemies off
source: pravdareport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
TSA starts banning all electronic devices larger than an exploding Samsung Galaxy 7 on airlines from 13 countries
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It's always embarrassing to lose a fight but when you get beaten up by Eeyore it's downright shameful. Good thing what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Paul's Memory Bank continues Swinging Through the Alphabet highlighting songs beginning with the letter "F". And in various points through the show a DMCA-compliant mini-tribute to Chuck Berry. Starting at 8 PM EDT
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Knight)
 
 
 
Photoshop this afterglow
source: pinspider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Prosecutor: I'm not going to seek the death penalty. Governor: Then you're fired. Next Prosecutor: uh, lemme think about this
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talk Radio (UK))
 
 
 
Those crazy Russians. When they aren't thinking up new ways to persecute racial minorities and gay people, they're thinking up new games involving pushing cars around frozen lakes
source: talkradio.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Norway unseats Denmark as happiest country. I'm assuming this makes Denmark unhappy. See how that works?
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Hey, let's give speeding ticket money to folks who obey the speed limit. BRILLIANT
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Mom changing to Dad at the same time as son changes to daughter. The next family reunion is sure going to be interesting
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Get checked for strep throat, people
source: philadelphia.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Photoshop this peaceful and hazard free work environment
source: i2.cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
While a mortuary was evacuated for weeks due to chemical leak, several bodies disappeared from their storage bins
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
New book details Hitler's plan to jack up supersolidiers with meth, cocaine, and livestock steroids before sending them to England on miniature submarines
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Thrillist)
 
 
 
It's hard to believe some of these people manage to stay alive, much less make it out to restaurants to eat
source: thrillist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Monday is International Day of Happiness. Note - the beatings will continue until morale improves
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
Roses are red / violets are top
source: palmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WNEP Scranton)
 
 
 
It takes skill to jump from a moving garbage truck into a snowbank, then slide down and get run over by the same garbage truck
source: wnep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Brexit will start March 29th
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Pink diamond worth millions shown in London. ♫ harun...harun...harun harun harun harun haruuuuunnnn ♫
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Time travel is real, just look at these ancient statues that are holding modern designer handbags. 100% definite proof
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
If you're 19 and hauling 30 cases of beer for spring break, don't drive 90 mph on the interstate
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Man who made the brilliant career move of opposing Putin has green dye sprayed in his face. And this was how St Putin chased all the democracy out of Russia, kids
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Intel offers no evidence of Trump Tower spying. To be honest, I always suspected AMD
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Beijing park clamps down on excess toilet roll usage with....*shakes magic 8-ball*... facial recognition
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 96.5 Florida)
 
 
 
Seriously, this gigantic chicken is scaring the hell out of people on the internet
source: preview.news965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
The sixth annual Father-Daughter Dance for inmates took place at the Richmond Justice Center Sunday afternoon
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Yakuza disappearing from across Japan. It's all been downhill for them since that guest shot on "The Simpsons"
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Tommy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this little alley cat
source: drugoigorod.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Say my name. You're Dr Heisenberg. You're goddamn right
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Syria: Hey Russia, how can we make the Syrians' lives even more miserable? Russia: Well here's an idea - let's start blowing up hospitals
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Australian teenager summons his inner Steve Irwin, survives a crocodile attack, then washes his thumb
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lincoln Journal Star)
 
 
 
Getting rid of old medicine getting easier; take it to your pharmacy any day. Or just give them to pilled out Pete. That guy will take anything
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Police investigating case of assault with deadly cheeseburger
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Re/code)
 
 
 
Fark you, fark you, fark Uber, this isn't cool, I'm out
source: recode.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Sara Connor sentenced to prison, soon to be busted out by a teenager and an Austrian on a motorcycle
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Today's math word problem: Your middle school teacher has 61 kilos of cocaine, 1 kilo of heroin, and a stash of weapons in her home. How many years will she serve? Please show your work (Not safe for work content in sidebar & below article)
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
In not-creepy-at-all news, this California city wants to photograph and identify every single car's license plate in real time and link it to other government databases. In real time
source: sandiegouniontribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Growing number of Americans would rather smoke cannabis than drink beer
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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