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Sun March 05, 2017
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Exclusive -- Winston Churchill's 1939 essay on alien life found in a box. Okay, it was never lost nor unpublished ... but, ALIENS
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Forget anchovies, pineapples, ranch dressing and eating utensils. Milk dipping is now the worst food crime you can inflict on a pizza
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this plane peruser
source: c.o0bg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
That story about a Japanese man crushed by his porn collection? Yeah...about that
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man tries to rob a fish and chips shop with a banana. Apparently he couldn't find a bar of soap
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
IRS budget cuts mean there are not enough agents for tax audits. America is great again
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Barry & District News)
 
 
 
"Steven could have stopped working following his accident but has chosen instead to put his efforts into doing his new job with energy and pride. He works incredibly hard, despite physical difficulty, to be the best at what he does"
source: barryanddistrictnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Daily News)
 
 
 
Thirty-three thousand bunny related items moving with the Bunny Museum, and nary a pancake to be found
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Photoshop these sailors pulling rope
source: i2.cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Before putting your own hair in your meal for a free dinner always make sure the security camera is not on you before complaining
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belleville News-Democrat)
 
 
 
"It's more time and effort than I want to put in," says Millennial regarding getting a driver's license
source: bnd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
Man tried to have sex with a fence. Actually, he did have sex with a fence
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deslidefied)
 
 
 
We're firing up the Wayback Machine this week as Snack Food Sunday looks at the most popular snacks of each year going back to 1960. Deslided for your enjoyment
source: deslide.clusterfake.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Case dis...dis...OHdismissed
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
"I thought she was texting and driving, so I stopped and was watching her to see what she was doing and she looked up, made eye contact and she actually mouthed the words, 'Help me,'"
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
County Durham pub unveils Britain's biggest steak dinner - 220 oz of beef for $150. It's on the same stunt menu as Britain's largest mixed grill and "a kebab sandwiched between two chicken parmos"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(12News Phoenix)
 
 
 
Your house burned down during a massive wildfire? Sorry for your loss, but we're the HOA. Pay up. Now
source: 12news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Officer, I swear I always beat mannequins staged to look like homeless men with a hammer. Doesn't everybody?
source: hardboilednews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Always after me lucky charms. Well this is the story of a bloke that was not so lucky
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Perks of being a TSA officer. In addition to all the crotches you can grab, you occasionally get to question Russian Playboy models
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WAOW Wausau)
 
 
 
Marge Simpson arrested after Maggie tests positive for meth, THC, cocaine and ecstasy. Mrmrhm
source: waow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Create a new clown
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Farm animal encounters
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
You see, darlin', this is a story in HuffPo about a cartoon in the New Yorker about how when you ask a question we feel obligated to answer it
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Another week, another installment of 'Go back to your effing country, BOOM' shooting
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Facebook)
 
 
 
The best comment thread on a police department Facebook post about a confiscated gun you will ever read
source: facebook.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Chimpanzee dies at Lion Country safari. Well, maybe it died because it was in lion country
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
American Troops occupy Manbij in a major escalation of the Syrian War
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
"I don't need to serve you anymore. We're trying to make America great again"
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Reporter beats off hockey mask-wearing attacker on live television
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 04, 2017
(Fox Business)
 
 
 
And YOU thought people paying a couple bucks for a bottle of water was dumb?
source: foxbusiness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
What are you going to do? Release the prisoners? Release the bees? Release the prisoners trained to keep bees so when they talk they shoot bees at you?
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Woman who gives up beer for Lent wins a case delivered to her home by a team of Clydesdales. It's divine intervention
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
Two brutal fights break out between adults at known hotspot for violence - Chuck E. Cheese, named for rogue rat Charles Ebenezer Cheese who was later convicted on a series of felonies for fraudulent use of a pizza by a rodent
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Dayton News)
 
 
 
For the first time in history, a Muslim will hold the post of chaplain for a U.S. Army division
source: mydaytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Michigan rep. will introduce a bill to make it illegal for police to have sex with prostitutes under investigation. In other news, Michigan is the only state in America where it's legal for police to have sex with prostitutes under investigation
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop these swinging kids
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Charity pub-crawlers team reaches 20,000th ale house after three decades of touring pubs. "Last May when we'd done 19,000 I took my lump sum out of my pension to get to 20,000 and I have spent the bloody lot"
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Parents sue city of Brooklyn after a botched autopsy implicated them in their child's death
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 1130)
 
 
 
"I never thought leopards would be born in captivity by artificial insemination," sobs woman who voted for the Leopards Born By Artificial Insemination Party
source: news1130.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop what this woman is doing
source: 3.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(8shiat)
 
 
 
Facebook user receives 200k "amens" to pic of her holding her dying cancer patient brother. There's just one slight problem
source: 8shit.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Are you arranging the food in your refrigerator correctly?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
What exactly is "usable marijuana," and should a 65-year-old man with a prescription be rolled into the joint if there isn't an exact definition?
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
There is a pop-up restaurant in London that only serves meals created out of discarded food from different local restaurants. Because what tastes better than unwanted bangers and mash mixed with boiled lamb's tongue?
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Come on, who steals two crocodiles?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
In a continuing series of wagers you should NEVER take - Betting that you can chug an entire bottle of tequila
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Remember kids always do your homework, or else you could be crucified in the street by your parents like this poor lad
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Seeking advice, I ask of thee / Trying to find (in my naivete) / Poetic verse to set me free / In the Book Club of Saturday
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Want to know if you are uncool? Check out the lingo that "all the cool kids" are using today, and see if you recognize any of it
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Don't mind the perfect black cube hovering over USA's top-secret military research complex today, it's really nothing. Move along now
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
You may want to rethink the wedding if your bride-to-be tells you she wants to wear a dress made out of Taco Bell burrito wrappers
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
I'm sorry, I've been drinking since last night. What? Why yes, I'm a Fark mod, how did you know? Oh, you think you can play catch up? Go ahead and try me. It's the Fark Weekly Weird News Quiz
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these colorful chairs
source: blog.resellerclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
If you ever said to yourself, "I wish my TSA agents wouldn't be shy about really getting intimate when they feel me up" then today is your lucky day
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MBL.is)
 
 
 
Indjánafjöður from Reykjavik rescued by Þorvarðardóttir, just in time for kötturdag
source: icelandmonitor.mbl.is   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Only you can prevent forest fires. And by 'you' we mean the people responsible for 80 percent of the world's wildfires
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
This is the coolest Viking funeral that you will see for two goldfish all day long
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Spend your twilight years wasting away in a Margaritaville-themed retirement home
source: gma.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
What is it with the iconic Quebec maple syrup can? No one remembers who designed it, for one thing: "a mystery for the ages - like trying to ascertain who gets the credit/blame for inventing poutine"
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
In time for St. Patrick's Day: Mass leprechaun grave found at former Irish orphanage
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 03, 2017
(SFGate)
 
 
 
California man evades high speed police chase while driving rented U-haul truck. Your move Florida man
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Meet Picasso, the rescue dog that looks like it was designed by Deep Mind
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
This is what happens when you grant bail to motorized grocery cart thieves
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Finally, a paper towel mascot for MEN to lust after
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
A gal who was painfully shy / Was given to walks through the rye / When asked what she learned / She scoffed and she spurned / "My wisdom's engrained by and by"
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Two best friends get identical haircuts to try and confuse their teachers. Fark: One is white and one is black
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Eugene Register-Guard)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bird balancing act
source: registerguard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Florida Man has had a busy week
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Nebraska officially became a state on March 1, 1867. The major difference between then and today? The Nebraska license plates were better in 1867
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Okay. Quick question. WTF are miniature horses for? You can't ride them. You can't shear their wool. You can't turn them into pack animals. Maybe you could sell the meat. Are they just tiny horses that eat and poop? What are they for?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Amusing Planet)
 
 
 
In 1942 an entire aircraft factory in California was covered in camouflage. The fake homes now go for $3000/sq.ft
source: amusingplanet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lehigh Valley Live)
 
 
 
When you're awaiting sentencing for a fatal hit and run, you might want to assume that all your calls are being monitored and recorded. You know, in case you say you feel no remorse for the victim's family or call the judge a f*cking a**hole
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Step right up, place your bets on Arkansas' eight upcoming executions taking place over the next ten days. Over under on each inmate experiencing an agonizing and painful death is five minutes
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Virginian-Pilot)
 
 
 
Sure he was unarmed, but look at that shot grouping
source: pilotonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
In a love story as old as time itself, a Japanese man died from the thing he loves the most. Gonna go out on a limb and guess that nobody cleared his browser history either
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Visa war looms between the US and EU. Something tells me they won't take American Express either
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this new growth
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Man admits to being super drunk, which is like regular drunk except you can cause a school lockdown with a single bound
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Cattle on the loose on Kansas highway. Numerous BBQ food trucks in hot pursuit. Your F150 wants steak
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Happy birthday to the state that makes bad news fun
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(41 Action News)
 
Video
 
Some guy's dashcam records drive-by shooting right in front of him. With audible gunshot goodness
source: kshb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
When St. Patrick's Day falls on a Lenten Friday, most Catholic dioceses issue a blanket exception for the day. And then there's St. Louis Archbishop Robert Carlson
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 96.5 Florida)
 
 
 
Giant dinosaur caught strolling across Florida golf course with massive fish clenched in his gnarly teeth
source: news965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Uber-UK loses a legal test case requiring that its drivers show a minimum proficiency in English. Merde
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Mizzurah gets to claim the anti-Semitic faux bomber
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
A significant portion of London is closed today due to undetonated World War II ordnance
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Good news guys -- there's a new "smart condom" on the market that can help scan your potential hookup for STDs. Downside -- it rates your performance
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Frat bros decide to haze pledge who passed out by rubbing peanut butter on his face, discover he has a severe allergy to peanuts
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Why does my new couch have marijuana in it?
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patheos)
 
 
 
"ATHE1ST" license plate request rejected in Indiana. No word if "ACLUSUES" plate available
source: patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Here hold my beer while I belt out a Pavarotti classic at the old construction worksite
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cuddly critter
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
It's Friday. In anticipation of what you plan to do much of this weekend, reward yourself by enjoying a slideshow of animals sleeping
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
This is the future that liberals want
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Good news, ladies. Thanks to a Nova Scotia judge, you don't have to worry that your driver will miss your "Yes" signals when you pass out in his cab
source: beta.theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Amazon)
 
 
 
So let's say you want to walk around with a bottle of beer but you're too lazy to hold it
source: amazon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
California Supreme Court rules that there is no such thing as private communications for government officials
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 San Francisco)
 
 
 
Mountain View High School sees a $40 million payday after someone 5 years ago had the good sense to invest $15,000 in a start up company called Snapchat
source: abc7news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Ben Seaver tries to blame his DUI on chicken nuggets when blaming on Mike failed and calls Carol a nerd
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Texas, Our Texas)
 
 
 
...in General Convention at the town of Washington on the 2nd day of March 1836
source: lsjunction.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Cop: "I caught you driving your car while under the influence of alcohol." Driver: "Yeah? Well, 25 years ago I killed a woman and got away with it, so compared to that this is nothing"
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 02, 2017
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Driver locks thirsty thief in back of beer truck. Not a repeat from Tuesday's staged video
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The latest craze sweeping the ranks of tween age girls is a giant bow hair clip called a JoJo bow. And of course some schools are banning them
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVH Helena)
 
 
 
More than 1000 bison killed in a few weeks. This is not a repeat from 1881
source: ktvh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Mikey may hate everything, but he loves hand sanitizer
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Vegan attacks chicken truck and, yes, alcohol was heavily involved. I mean, no one said vegans could not drink
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 2 Fort Myers)
 
 
 
Not news: Population has doubled since 2010. Florida: Population infected with Syphilis
source: nbc-2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Millennials: We're sooooooo lonely because our friends are always online. WAAAAAAAAAAA
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
$400 worth of cookies missing from Pepperidge Farm truck...culprits caught in nearby alley, in possession of cookies and marijuana
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Switching over from meatball and disassembled furniture production, the Swedes prepare for war
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Civil Rights Movement)
 
 
 
Man who threatened to kill Kevin and also tried to kill Kevin is scooted back to Florida. That rascal
source: thenewcivilrightsmovement.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Apparently those new Peep Oreos are the gift that keeps on giving
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Is chess a gateway to heroin abuse?
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Wavy Bench)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lounging fashionista
source: static.wixstatic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFMJ Youngstown)
 
 
 
Guy that cops say seeks 3 hots & a cot hurls brick thru Youngstown Police station's front door...for the 2nd time in 6 months: "I just want to go to jail"
source: wfmj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
You know you are in for a convoluted story when a reporter twice has to insert like this to explain story. Oh yeah and the story is about a baby with a blunt in her crib, a real baby as in months old
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Man asks casino not to let him in. Fast forward 17 years when he wins $10,002 at the casino, only to have the winnings denied because of what he'd forgotten he'd signed
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Let he that has never eaten a wildebeest cast the first stone
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sucks)
 
 
 
Owl evicted from chimney at Duke University. Very rare owl trifecta now in play. Also Duke Sucks
source: today.duke.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Man ordered to remove his Trump 2016 sign, but the KKK flag next door is still A-OK
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
And Jeff recuses
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlas Obscura)
 
 
 
Some guy in Colorado took out an ad in the Times of London saying that he's the rightful King of England and intends to seize power in 30 days. Legal marijuana. Is there anything it can't do?
source: atlasobscura.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
After 60 years, Hamilton, Ontari -- CAR -- Hamilton, Ontario legalizes stre -- CAR -- legalizes street ho -- CAR -- After 60 years, Hamilton, Ontario legalizes street hockey a -- CAR -- AFTER 60 YEARS, HAMILTON, ONTARIO LEGALIZES STREET HOCKEY AGAIN
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this meet the beetles
source: 3.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Man tells arresting officer in car: "I hope you enjoy cleaning that up." Maybe he meant his face (with mugshot)
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFSB Connecticut)
 
 
 
Admit it, you laughed at Betsy DeVos and her "potential grizzlies." Guess who has the last laugh?
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Laconia Daily Sun)
 
 
 
Skimming a snowmobile across a 30 degree lake pulling a water skier and filming it is one thing. Putting that film up on the internet will certainly help the authorities find you
source: laconiadailysun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
One hot reason to visit Alaska during the winter: Rondy Fur Bikini Contest
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Old piece of mold goes for $14,600. Looks like my refrigerator just became a goldmine
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Two rules of cremation: Rule 1: make sure the person is dead before you start. Rule 2: see rule 1
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyPolitics.org)
 
 
 
Indiana doesn't care what medical science says, the LAW says you can reverse an abortion. Now put it back in
source: indypolitics.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Cat cafés have become so blasé that Japan has decided to open Owl cafés
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Pro Tip: Turn off your body cam before stealing money from the suspect you just pulled over
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
You'd think that "The Walking Dead" was just a TV show. You'd think
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
The Randolph County (Indiana) Sheriff's department would like to reassure you that there is absolutely NO zombie outbreak happening right now. None. Not at all. Nothing to see here, move along
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
If you chose not to have kids you're unfulfilled, morally bankrupt and disgusting according to those jealous people saddled with kids
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sink
source: mobileimages.lowes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Security camera captures dog jumping up to say hi to burglar while owner sleeps on couch nearby
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
The global crisis you've never heard of until now is sand mining
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Bullied 8-year-old put in handcuffs for fighting back
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Tattoo-removal chain Dr. Tatoff prescribes you to live with your poor life choices AND without the money you paid to rectify them
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
What's the most annoying sound in the world? For this woman almost every sound is
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
Video
 
That one time Dave Grohl sang Band On the Run for Paul McCartney and Barack Obama
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
The good citizens of Arizona are one step closer to reclaiming their God-given right to shoot rats and snakes on their property within city limits
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Boston)
 
 
 
Duke sucks. Harvard watches it
source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 617: "Religion and Spirituality 4". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 01, 2017
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
Teacher who was asked to mentor and got in trouble for mentoring and was going to get fired is now going to keep her job YAY
source: palmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Irish priest runs novel 'Drive-Thru' for Ash Wednesday. No word if you get fries with that holy smudge
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Are you noshing at some hipster cafe and concerned that you aren't "in the know" about the latest food trends? This glossary helps you distinguish khachapuri from poké and casually order them with a Turbo G&T - "the new espresso martini"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
A good day to be wearing brown pants
source: truckyeah.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSTP St. Paul)
 
 
 
Minnesota's Rochester school district rejects 80 unvaccinated children from the student body
source: kstp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these shadow walkers
source: d6d2h4gfvy8t8.cloudfront.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
They say life is cheap for some, but still, beating a man to death for a buck fourteen seems a bit excessive
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
If you thought cute and cuddly pandas just ate bamboo and other vegetables think again, there's a wild one on the loose in rural Sichuan, China that eats goats (Graphic)
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Desert Sun)
 
 
 
People say this guy Rich Meaney is... wait for it
source: desertsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talk Radio (UK))
 
 
 
Fark headline of the day: Art museum visitor destroys £600,000 pumpkin with selfie crash
source: talkradio.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Man arrested after willingly posing as member of Nickelback
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions in a car delivered to you because you can't fit through the door
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Flight from Heathrow to San Francisco cancelled due to a mouse sneaking on board. Suspicions were first raised when passengers spotted a cat running up and down the aisles with a large wooden mallet
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this model getting ready for her closeup
source: media1.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Knowing the difference between the gas pedal and the brake becomes much more important when you're seven floors up
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Pope Francis gets some ash
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washingtonian)
 
 
 
Officials at the National Park Service predict that due the very warm February the famous cherry blossoms in DC will hit their peak between the March 14-17, or tied for the earliest peak on record and about 2 1/2 weeks earlier than "normal"
source: washingtonian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
I actually never thought that was...I never considered the question, even a possibility. But now..." said President Winfrey 4 years before she became the 46th U.S. president
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Man's plan to steal lemons, woman's underwear goes sour (with mugshot)
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Russian jets "accidentally" bomb U.S.-backed forces in Syria. Story developing
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Some people get a little depressed when turning the big 50 years old. Then there's this man who blew up his own house
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
There once was a lad from Peno, who once shot a man in Reno, to watch him die, and now he fries, I have a hankering for...fish? THIS is your Fark Writer's Thread "Backed into a corner" edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Over the centuries, a lot has changed about how Christians observe Lent, but one thing remains the same: Everyone always says they're giving up chocolate
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Cows have a new enemy: drones
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Sonogram shows baby flashing distinctive hand sign as it rocks out in the womb
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Hard hitting piece of journalism from the New York Times: A man's struggle on his trying to grow a beard
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Photoshop this woman on her knees
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Emergency doctor tells patients with memory problems that Trump is now president, not Jimmy Carter
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Well no shiat. We have healthcare, pot, sane Republicans, mass transit, 4 distinct seasons, *and* sports teams that actually win
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Clown suits and slamming balls, when the walls fell
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Protip: When being chased by police, jumping from one rooftop to another only works in the movies
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Just a reminder - In this age of cameras being everywhere, there is no such thing as 'finders keepers' when it comes to cash on the ground
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSLA Shreveport)
 
 
 
You know what would happen if you were dumb enough to try some Dukes of Hazzard driving in real life? Something like this
source: ksla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Midwest colleges to Alaska Natives: Should we not have dug up your dead relatives and let students experiment on them? Our bad, we'll ship them back in some Uhaul boxes
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue February 28, 2017
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
San Diego received 2.34" of rain on Monday, which beats the 2.19" average ... the MONTHLY average
source: sandiegouniontribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Old and busted: The Wet Bandits. New and scary: The Sperm Bandits
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSN Wichita)
 
 
 
Guerrilla urban planners in Wichita use toilet plungers to demarcate bike lanes
source: ksn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Florida man Florida man'ed a hotel room
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HelenaIR.com)
 
 
 
Montana chooses to have people find out about a loved one's death on social media, freeing up police for more important matters than notifying next of kin
source: helenair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rocketnews 24)
 
 
 
Dark and stretchy are not usual words to describe ice cream, unless it's Häagen-Dazs' new Japanese flavor
source: en.rocketnews24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Dumb: Posting threats and "homophobic slurs, sexually-graphic language, and references to racial stereotypes" on the public pages of celebrities you disagree with. Idiot: "he did not realize they were viewable by the public"
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
The Oscars rising star, Gary from Chicago, was released from prison just three days before the ceremony after spending twenty years behind bars for committing multiple felonies. He sees this as his redemption
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WANE Ft. Wayne)
 
 
 
Apparently, getting caught embezzling $63,000 provokes the same reaction as losing the gold medal in the vault
source: wane.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Seattle City Light employee investigated for adding Cameras and Action in the men's room
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop these fine specimens of Lepidoderma tigrinum
source: c2.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
CNN: Are recreational marijuana and opioid addiction linked? Experts in article: "No"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Scientists say that a permanent human colony on Mars would evolve into a new human species, causing the skin to change color, bone density to increase, eyes enlarge due to lower light and women to have three breasts
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pacific Standard Magazine)
 
 
 
Imagine Entourage starring Milo Yiannopoulos and some bathing-optional Internet tough guys
source: psmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The Tampa Jewish community has raised nearly $60,000 to help repair a torched Mosque, surpassing their $40,000 goal in under a week
source: linkis.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Irate motorist leaves the most British note ever for a person who parked badly
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSBW Monterey)
 
 
 
Not to alarm anyone, but the Amazon Server Farm of Northern Virginia seems to be seceding from the Internet
source: ksbw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lowering the Bar)
 
 
 
Not listed: Official state mugshot, Official state meth formula
source: loweringthebar.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deslidefied)
 
 
 
Worst baby names of 2016. Come for "Elizabreth" and "Meldor," run screaming for brain bleach when you get to "Little Sweetmeat." Seriously, don't go past that one, it gets worse
source: deslide.clusterfake.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
99-year-old Nederlander gets handcuffed to fulfill bucket list item. Kinky
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this abandoned movie set
source: terraoko.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS San Francisco)
 
 
 
There's gold in them thar hills. And after this year's historic rains, it's pretty easy to find
source: sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
What's worse than worms hiding in your shower head? Oh
source: news.asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
♪ Shot through the heart, and you're to blame, you give random gunfire in murderous love triangles a bad name ♪
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Born in the '90s? Congratulations, you're four times as likely to get a case of the ass
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
If you're a trucker driving to visit President Trump with "bombs," it's easy to catch you if you call 911 to announce your plan
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
I don't think the real Jesus would shout 'Oh Sh*t' when he got his cross stuck in the ceiling on the underground
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
If you thought you were having a bad day at work, spare a thought for the French sniper who just accidentally shot two people during a Presidential speech
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Girl Scouts introduce new Melee Cookies in Fark's favorite state
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
"...98, 99, 100...255, 256, 257...10167, 10168, 10169- Fark this, let's grab a beer"
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Car plows into crowd at Mardi Gras parade. Sadly this is not a repeat from a few days ago
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Autopsy being performed to identify the exact cause of death for man who was run over by bulldozer. I may be going out on a limb here, but I'm guessing 'bulldozer'
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Moo. I'm a cow. Seriously, don't look at the antlers, I'm a cow goddammit, just trust me on this
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peterborough Telegraph)
 
 
 
VIDEO: Police called to break up brawl started by bagels on late night train from London
source: peterboroughtoday.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
You people need to move away from your hometowns, you're a threat to the very existence of the American dream
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The Harvard Law Review, for the first time in its 130-year history, has elected a female African American president, just 27 years after it elected the first African American man to lead the publication. But nobody knows what happened to him afterwards
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Man captured at Port Authority after carrying a gun and 106 rounds of hollow-point bullets
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Man who shot up bar thought he was shooting Iranians which would technically still be illegal
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Aw, hell no
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Couple couldn't wait for 12" pepperoni, decided to go with the 6" usual instead
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Who stabs a Hippo, seriously?
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Class action lawsuit says that Jared jewelers was a "hotbed of sexual harassment for female employees." Sorta gives a creepy new meaning to their slogan, "He got it at Jared's"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Wanna be a doc without all the annoying coursework? Fake it 'til you make it, but don't get caught purchasing fake awards (with mugshot)
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Bicyclist's lawsuit claims that a mechanized street sweeper chased and struck him. Michael Bay seen reaching for a pen and some paper
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
1. Get thrown in GitMo. 2. Sue. 3. Profit. 4. Join ISIS; get killed in a suicide bombing raid. It's the ciiiiiircle of liiiiiiiiife
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Two Georgia residents sentenced to decades in prison for trying to honor their heritage
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRTV Great Falls)
 
 
 
Try not to get any more DUIs on your way out of the parking lot
source: krtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
North Carolina congregation recalls the magic of their wedding nights, when the veil was lifted, the bride was carried across the threshold, the groom gave her the first peck on the cheek, and waited another year for permission to have intercourse
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Saudi King brings 506 tons of luggage on 9-day trip. Subby's ex-wife unimpressed
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
There's nothing worse than waking up to what you think is the sound of fireworks only to discover your girlfriend has shot you multiple times in the penis and scrotum
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Massive Chile rains kill three, cut off water for millions. Man, it's a good thing it just rains water around here
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
Woman transcends death to post selfie after surviving turbulence on flight from Chicago to San Diego
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
If anyone has the head of Jesus Christ, the Cottage Avenue Pentecostal Fellowship in Indianapolis would like it back
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Russian ballet dancer released from Guantanamo Bay prison after being held 15 years. Apparently authorities heard him mention an "Arabesque" and that was enough to consider him a terrorist
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yale University)
 
 
 
If Aliens come to Earth in the future looking for Yaqui Catfish, we're screwed
source: e360.yale.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
"We went to the zoo and unfortunately, STDs came up again, and I knew it was over"
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Driver of Seattle taco truck stuck in major traffic jam figures "Hmm, why not?"
source: 1077theend.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
5. Take your truck for a bumpy ride with lots of violent turns and slamming on the brakes. 4. Close and lock the back door. 3. Wait until someone gets in to steal your stuff. 2. Load boxes of manure in a U-Haul. 1. Mount a camera inside the truck
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon February 27, 2017
(KETV Omaha)
 
 
 
Rescue dog rescues owner from early-morning house fire. Your dog says "good girl, give her a steak"
source: ketv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Remembering Buzzwinkle - Alaska's most notorious drunken moose
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
You should never take your work home with you after you retire, especially if you work with grenade launchers
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
Chicago breaks another 146 year old record (since records began). No snow in the months of January or February
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(105.9 The Brew)
 
 
 
No eyebrows were raised after meth enthusiast takes police on wild chase through two states
source: 1059thebrew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"If anyone here knows a reason why these two should not be married, speak now or forever hold your peace. Not you, Mr. Whale"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
This bears repeating: Do not drive your car with your window open at wildlife parks
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Bedbugs kill 96-year-old Stoner
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Today's Mad Libs ready headline: 2-year-old found licking bong in running car
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Cops: Customer deposited bag of cocaine in bank ATM
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
What the actual hell is going on here in Australia? Is this a pointless sport, or some sort of mosquito fogging system, or both?
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
In a move that will surely piss off no one, giant cross installed outside Mosul to mark progress against ISIS
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Paul's Memory Bank is continuing "Swinging Through the Alphabet" with 2 hours of songs beginning with the letter "C". Show starts at 8PM ET
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Professor who has taken a photo of himself every day for the past 30 years now has 11,000 pictures. Or as Kim Kardashian calls that, a pretty good weekend
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
British man selling Swiss mountain air for $167 a bottle. Sure, you can laugh now, but just wait until you have to cancel your ski trip in Switzerland when there's no air left
source: thelocal.ch   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Lawn Lover)
 
 
 
Photoshop this turf top
source: webpages.uidaho.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Daily News)
 
 
 
Re-trial of former L.A. County Sheriff on corruption charges begins even though he's in the early stages of Alzheimer's. Lawyer advises him to answer every question with "I can't recall"
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
PSA: Make sure your burglary victim isn't a Brazilian jiujitsu master (with ouch-y mugshot)
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Neo Nazi arrested for making his roommate great again
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
Video
 
Irate airline passenger goes full Samuel L. Jackson when passengers fail to exit craft on her schedule. Bonus points for dude in foreground doing everything short of eating his own hand to stifle laughter (Not safe for work language)
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
52 seconds is what it took two 'bashful' pandas at the Tokyo zoo to mate after a four year hiatus. Which is probably 30 seconds longer than most human males can take after four years of no nookie
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Today, when you're feeling down, just remind yourself that at least you're not the person who has to hose out the rubber sex dolls at this brothel
source: thelocal.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVQ Billings)
 
 
 
Former Marine fires 6 shots in a shopping mall parking lot in an attempt to stop: (A) a kidnapping (B) a murder (C) shoplifters
source: ktvq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
WHO names 12 bacteria that pose the greatest threat to human health; is on first, playing "Boris the Spider"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSAZ West Virginia)
 
 
 
There's nothing weird about getting some exercise by running with the high school track team, right?
source: wsaz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Millennials aren't job hopping, mostly because they can't find jobs
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
SpaceX to recreate Apollo 8
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"And just what would my duties entail as sex tsar?"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Why do people swear? What a stupid farking question
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
Teacher who was asked to mentor students is now in trouble for mentoring student
source: mypalmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Why we link to "those sites," plus new tag announcement
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Iceland Review)
 
 
 
Iceland's capital's 2 foot snowfall breaks 80 year old record. Cleveland, Buffalo, and Syracuse chuckle, point out that 2 feet of snow there is called "Any Tuesday in April"
source: icelandreview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Wrap)
 
 
 
White woman who self-identified as black, Rachel Dolezal, near homelessness after rejecting porn offers
source: thewrap.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sacred selfie
source: cdn3.spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
From the Institute of Researchers Who Forgot They Were Supposed to Publish Something Today: "Women with children more sleep deprived than those without"
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
In Florida, responsible gun ownership means keeping a spare piece on the side
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
"'The GPS showed him in the lake,' said [the teen's mom], who figured the GPS was malfunctioning." It wasn't. With scrapbook-worthy pictures
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Dffsfd
source: i0.kym-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Private women's prison deprived inmates of heat and hot water for months, according to lawmaker. I'm fairly certain I've seen a video of this
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
You may think you're tough, but are you tough enough to survive the Notorious RBG's workout?
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
You can have a 'brain orgasm,' but you've got to watch a creepy video first
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
Drone strike that killed Al-Qaeda #2 appears to have used a new and revolutionary weapon designed to limit collateral damage, either by striking the target with micro munitions or by dropping an anvil on his head
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Five more Best Korean officials executed by anti-aircraft gun after 'enraging' Kim Jong Un. To be fair, if you're going to work in his government, you've got to be ready to catch a lot of flak
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Male flight attendant charged with calling in two bomb threats faces decades in prison. With a name like Cox-Sever, he was probably destined to end up there
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
"Alright Mr...'Smith,' you're going to have to show us more than your driver's license if you want to get through this TSA checkpoint." "But, I was born in PA and have lived in Maine and SC all my life." "Nice try, Akmed. NEED A PATDOWN HERE"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVB Boise)
 
 
 
Dan Sevy, a Followers of Christ church member, said pharmaceuticals and medicine are a product from Satan. He went on to explain that pharmaceuticals are derived from the Greek word "pharmakeia," a word they say translates to witchcraft and sorcery
source: ktvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Did they take his mugshot before or after the pills were removed from his butt?
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
Last weekend's February tornado in snow-covered western Massachusetts was about as common as the Cubs winning the World Series
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WYMT Hazard)
 
 
 
Ark Encounter not living up to economic promise. Maybe they should pray harder
source: wkyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seeker)
 
 
 
There are search and rescue dogs, why not search and rescue cats?
source: seeker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Attention Farkers, please retire your existing, and now outdated, "insane girlfriend face" meme pictures and upgrade them with nearly any picture from this article. That is all
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Dehydrated hippo, sexy giraffes, and digital soup. These are YOUR Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2017-02-19 to Sat 2017-02-25
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Waking nightmares The Teletubbies turn twenty
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Tourists. please don't ply the Bahamas beach pigs with junk food and alcohol - it kind of kills them
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Review)
 
 
 
Do you know a slacker that's living the low-stakes life? It's probably because of adolescent resentments
source: nationalreview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Drone strike in Syria results in Al Qaeda having to go on Career Builder and solicit resumes for a new #2
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these pandas
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Spokesman for Canadian oil refinery insists that absolutely nothing is going on at the plant and you should ignore any photos of the entire complex engulfed in towering clouds of flame to the contrary
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
In Maine, the decline of the blood worm is making scientists squirm
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Airline introduces world's first beer specifically designed to be enjoyed at high altitudes. Tastes great at 35,000 feet
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
When real life resembles a Harry Potter book: Scientists say an elixir made from dragon's blood could bring somebody back from the threshold of death
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Truck that plowed into a Mardi Gras parade in New Orleans was less terrorism and more Mardi Gras
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Before he was president, Abraham Lincoln was a street-fighting man: "It's not mythology. Lincoln, an awesome physical specimen at 6-feet-4, was widely known for his wrestling skills and had only one recorded defeat in a dozen years"
source: sports.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
New gym opens in San Francisco where not only will smoking pot during a workout be acceptable, it will be encouraged
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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