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Sun February 05, 2017
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Falcons win popular vote
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
In case you were wondering which lousy pizza place is closest to you
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
"Hold my cruise ship drink, I'm going to leap 55ft off this cruise ship diving board and somersault into this pool"
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
Meet the only criminal forensic ornithologist in the United States
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mortal coil
source: newshour.s3.amazonaws.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Walmart.com)
 
 
 
I have no idea what you're talking about, so here's a cartoon penis in a listing for a digital camera on Walmart.com (page is Farked, but the image is the first post in the thread)
source: walmart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Newscasters try to explain what various emojis mean without having a clue
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sea route
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Passengers enter NYC subway car filled with Nazi graffiti, are unsure what to do. One guy: "Hand sanitizer removes Sharpie. Who's got some?" Within minutes car full of people are working together to literally wipe out hate
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AutoBlog)
 
 
 
Thieves steal $3.7M worth of engines, but joke's on them because they're Jag engines
source: autoblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wisconsin State Journal)
 
 
 
Breast-feeding may have been involved, but it was probably the Cubs
source: host.madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
Teen math prodigy lands teaching gig at UCLA. What were YOU doing at 18?
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cosmopolitan)
 
 
 
In honor of the day, where Americans of all stripes gather together to stuff their faces, welcome to the first Snack Food Sunday thread. This week: last minute party snacks
source: cosmopolitan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Are you sick of going to bed late and waking up tired? Then grab your hiking boots and a tent. Yes, in February
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STV.tv)
 
 
 
On the list of places it's never a good idea to break into, police stations are pretty near the top
source: stv.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
1,941 people break the world record for most humans simultaneously floating in the water, topping the old record set in NYC's East River
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Man parks truck on top of car to defend family in road rage incident, police say
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this underwater hula hoop user
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Friendly bets
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Romero Institute releases study which finds that vaginas can be expensive
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Trump supporters want to boycott Budweiser because new commercial portrays immigrant founder in a positive fashion
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(12News Phoenix)
 
 
 
If an Arizona legislator gets his way, passengers in cars will need to show their ID cards or risk going to jail
source: 12news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
The U.S. Court of Appeals for the 9th Circuit announced, at a time they knew Trump would be wide awake, that they have denied the Department of Justice's emergency motion to lift the travel ban restraining order
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Investigators have discovered the cause of that piano shop fire. You might want to sit down for this. . . It was. . A bad cord. Pianist
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming up at the top of the hour it's the pre-Super Bowl edition of Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Join us for two hours of music hosted live by a farker in Juneau, Alaska (9PM AKST/10PM PST)
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat February 04, 2017
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
When a headline asks a question, the answer is usually no. Usually
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Muggers tell how they pick their victims. Yeah, it's pretty much what you'd guess
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(12News Phoenix)
 
 
 
Arizona Chamber of Commerce president calls teachers "crybabies" for wanting better pay in a state where the average teacher salary is the worst in the country. That's not how to attract good companies to your state, pal
source: 12news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this criminal being evicted
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Springfield News-Leader)
 
 
 
Up to two dozen bald eagles have found a great place to bed down for the winter, complete with juicy rainbow trout to enjoy
source: news-leader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
I have a candy bowl at my desk at work. Peanut M&Ms are the most popular, but I switched to packaged stuff for sanitary reasons. I like to keep it interesting so I recently stocked it with small Slim Jims and more recently fortune cookies. What next?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Bright yellow car notorious for photobombing pictures of photogenic village vandalised. Police seeking tourist with poor photoshop skills
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(12News Phoenix)
 
 
 
Teens these days aren't known for doing intellectual things. Case in point: snorting condoms through your nose and out your mouth
source: 12news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 10 Phoenix)
 
 
 
Learning cursive handwriting will soon be a requirement for Arizona students. The problem is that teachers need brushing up on it, too
source: fox10phoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man guilty of having sex with a horse ordered to reign in the urges he been saddled with
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
"This is Walmart. We don't take kindly to diaper thieves around here." *BANG*
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Cost of average American wedding reaches record-breaking $35,329 ... farm animals, drones, gospel choirs and drunk brides included
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Even the bubble wrap washing up on the beach in Australia is deadly
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this list writer. BONUS: Two angles to choose from
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Forget the Super Bowl or the upcoming NBA All Star game, we now have a new world record in cup stacking
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Flu spreads to forty states
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
For seemingly the 100th time - The FBI will never show up unannounced and demand money
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Pizza Hut employee and company president trade places: She gets Super Bowl tickets, he does her job for the day
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
"Quick, clear the snow." Boeing 777 makes precautionary landing at tiny remote Canadian airport that most can't even pronounce
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Watch various scared Swedes on top of a 10 meter board, stay for the last woman who totally kicks ass
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
Sure, journalism isn't a really high-paying job for most reporters, but that doesn't mean recruiting entry-level writers into an international cocaine smuggling ring is the answer, Mr. Music Editor
source: news.nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Australian fisherman use tried and true Aussie method of warding off a Great White Shark. And you better believe it involves Not Safe For Work language, mate
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some How To Guy)
 
 
 
This week in the Saturday Morning Book Club we're looking for the best "How To" books, the ones that are indispensable or just downright useful
source: lifestyleupdated.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Fire destroys local piano shop. No matter how you spinet, it's not grand. It's an upright disaster
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Daily News)
 
 
 
They target white vans for tools, why not paint them black... Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm..., hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vman)
 
 
 
Photoshop this new trend
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Ollie the bobcat escaped her enclosure at the National Zoo, prompting a massive search by zoo keepers and police, who fail to find her. If only they had thought to look near the zoo's bird house, they could have avoided being a Caturday headline
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Daycare asks parents picking up their children in the afternoon to put down their phones and at least pretend like they're happy to see their kids
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Feeling the burn is actually bad, you don't need to stretch before a workout, you can swim right after eating, and other exercise myths debunked
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
The healing can never begin until cops stop applauding when they witness an anti-Trump protester get punched
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Hold my beer and watch this"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Other Burger Clown)
 
 
 
Jack In The Box introduces Triple Bacon Buttery Jack, made with bacon, bacon mayo, bacon butter & dammit why won't you die already?
source: insidesocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Castanet)
 
 
 
Radiation unique to Fukushima meltdown has been detected in southern B.C. salmon. EVERYBODY PAN... Fark it, you'll get a higher dose by sitting in the Sun for 20 mins
source: castanet.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
Forget Punxsutawney Phil, down in Texas they have Bee Cave Bob the armadillo predicting that our nightmarish 2 weeks of winter is almost over
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Cockroaches in my brain? It's more likely than you think
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Dude, where's my car? Oh yeah, crashed into Leonard's house again
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri February 03, 2017
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Fark Headline: Could Super Bowl halftime potty breaks harm Fraser sinkhole mess?
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Warning: Objects in windshield are much closer than they appear
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
Video
 
Shut the hell up and look at how happy this wiener dog is to be reunited with his favorite toy after almost 5 years
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
PSA: If you want to get a tattoo that's your business, however getting a tattoo on a hairless cat is just plain stupid
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
U-581: Kriegsmarine Hide-and-Seek Champion, 1942-2017
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
After careful experimentation, the Portland Department of Transportation discovers that salt will melt ice. This is not a repeat from the 16th century
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Local government encourages residents to drink more alcohol
source: owasa.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
If you drive a Nissan Altima, Nissan wants you to know that your door will sometimes open if your window is down. Oops
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Goop)
 
 
 
When the heat in your relationship is gone, light your bra on fire
source: goop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Imagine mistakenly wandering across the Indian border in 1963 and not being able to go home to China to this day? Happened to this poor sod
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Why do women have the best sex of their lives at the age of 33?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this finger puppet family
source: loubilou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
NewsFlash
 
Federal Judge to Trump: how about no on that travel ban of yours?
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Remember the starving toddler found living on the streets in Nigeria because his parents thought he was a witch? Well one year full of love along with three hots and a cot have made a world of difference
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
El Chapo annoyed that American jailers take keeping him in jail seriously
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
USS Cole is patrolling off the coast of Yemen. Let's hope this isn't a repeat from 2000
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
So those videos Centcom showed off yesterday of all the "valuable intelligence" they supposedly captured in that disastrous raid in Yemen that got a Navy SEAL killed? Yeah, they just copped to the fact those are really videos that have been online since 2007
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Montana)
 
 
 
Montana legislature debates bill allowing hunters to wear fluorescent pink instead of orange, dubbed the "Aw Hell No What the Sweet Christ Y'all Buncha Damn Sissy Pantywaists Thinkin'" Act of 2017
source: nbcmontana.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABL13 Houston)
 
 
 
Heard of the 'Don't flash your headlights at high beams' urban legend? Not an urban legend anymore
source: abc13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Bearded man tosses explosives into a Pasadena CA Cheescake Factory. Penny Hofstadter thankful she no longer works there
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this classically posing dog
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
New York police investigate a potential suicidal jump off the George Washington Bridge, though some witnesses say a green man on a glider was seen battling with a man in red and blue tights and tossed a bound blonde woman over the side
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
Man opens dental practice after watching a few YouTube videos. Fark: And performs some successful procedures before getting caught
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Does it bug the hell out of you to hear other people eat? If yes, scientists say your brain is abnormal
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Man who repeatedly insists in divorce court that he's unable to pay his ex-wife's attorney fees because he's broke and unable to find work shows up to court one day driving a brand new car. You can guess what happens next
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
I'm a cheerleader crab, your argument is invalid
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
"Alcohol abuse may be the single best predictor of whether you commit gun violence in America"
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJLA Washington DC)
 
 
 
Some guidelines for Tinder users. 1: Don't send pictures of your schlong 2: Don't swipe left compulsively 3: Make sure your date doesn't rob your clothes and leave you to walk home naked
source: wjla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Japan has a word for "literally worked to death." It's "karoshi" and it happens pretty frequently
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Influential muggle news outlet Washington Post censors the word "mudbl--d" (paragraph 11)
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ottawa Citizen)
 
 
 
The City of Ottawa to use a big red O for all their transit stops. However, men may never know if it is fake or real
source: ottawacitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Police station fumigated after men caught in a store sex act were found to have scabies
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Dozens of Britons notice the introduction of vegetable rationing. Haggis still an acceptable entree
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Relax everyone. There won't be an aporkalypse
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Photoshop this typical winter event
source: i2.cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Doctors are warning parents about the latest stupid internet game called "the salt and ice challenge." Basically it gives your skin instant frostbite, and you lose blood vessels and nerve endings. Yay
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Man brings knife to a gun fight at the Louvre with predictable results
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Need something to smile about? Watch this awesome school teacher's custom handshakes
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A third of U.S. citizens believe only Christians can be true Americans like Jesus was
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
'Sharkwater' filmmaker disappears in ocean near Florida Keys, presumed to be making new documentary detailing life inside a shark
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Vets are seeing a lot of stoned dogs lately. Symptoms include lethargy and non-stop video game play. Also, loss of appetite which makes no sense. These dogs don't know how to party
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Edmonton Sun)
 
 
 
Germany erects wall around America and the tourists love it
source: edmontonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Kellyanne Conway cites the infamous Bowling Green Massacre in defense of Trump's Muslim ban. And really, who could ever forget that tragic event?
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
IRS lawyer arrested for selling meth. Adding insult to injury: his plans to deduct his expenses on Schedule C derailed by 26 USC § 280E
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu February 02, 2017
(Bismarck Tribune)
 
 
 
*Sigh* Once again, when at the airport or on a plane don't talk about having a bomb. In fact, avoid using the word "bomb" at all
source: bismarcktribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(1190 KEX Portland)
 
 
 
Judge Doody drops the puck on gold digger that smuggled precious metals in his Canadian starfish
source: 1190kex.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Radio 102.3 Portland)
 
 
 
Rival gang member slaps the living shiat out of dead man at his funeral
source: radio1023.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this ultra first class section
source: fresher.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Family finds rattlesnake in toilet bowl, 23 more under the house. Don't sit down, Marie
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Agency responsible for Seattle light rail seems to forget escalators are transportation too, and critically important when light rail station designers opt not to include stairs
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
That's one talented pecker
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Randy Christian probes corpse found by squirrel hunter
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
FL votes cast for Mickey Mouse exceed Trump's margin of victory over Clinton. Florida tag edges out, Strange, Unlikely, and Sad tags by a hanging chad
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(El Pais)
 
 
 
Topless women leave Buenos Aires beach peacefully but state "To make the tit-phobes happy, we're leaving this fascist beach, but we'll be back another day and there will be many more of us" (Not safe for work video in article)
source: elpais.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Caption Tiger Woods
source: i2.cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Food Nut)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Valentine's Day is coming soon.. Have a dish you love to make for the special occasion?
source: pinchofyum.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent Journal Review)
 
 
 
If the groundhog sees his shadow, six more weeks of winter, if he doesn't, an early spring. If he sees Mayor de Blasio, he rolls over and dies
source: ijr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
What hath globalization wrought? Somali immigrants in America, homesick for a taste of the old country, take advantage of unwanted feral camels in Australia, and sell them as burgers and kebabs in the states. Capitalism, ta-da
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this LEGO Porsche in its natural setting
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
It's official: Matt Drudge has aligned himself with Jar Jar Binks in an effort to destroy civilization
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inland Valley Daily Bulletin)
 
 
 
Y'ever have one of those days where you feel like crashing your truck into your old workplace, beating up your ex-boss, then keeling over?
source: dailybulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(War is Boring)
 
 
 
Lessons learned from flying a B-17 over Italy include: Don't underestimate the Regia Aeronautica's fighter pilots, Texans are arrogant jerks, avoid French sausage
source: warisboring.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Hitler phone up for auction, highest bid from anonymous bidder in Washington DC
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Let's revisit the cautionary tale of The Leaning Tower of San Francisco and see how things are unfolding
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"A seemingly-psychic Twitter account has appeared, apparently predicting Brexit, the Trump presidency and Beyoncé's baby news. Because we've got too much time on our hands, here's our theory how they're doing it"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Fearless praying mantis vs. the curious cat
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Dad of woman who had sex at courthouse and posted it on Facebook says he's NOT shocked
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Arnold Schwarzenegger responds to Trump: How about we switch jobs? Then people can sleep comfortably again
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
27 rum and cokes in nine hours. Amateur
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Mayor accused of disturbing 14 graves, must now prepare for a zombie attack
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Trump calls on National Prayer Breakfast attendees to pray for Arnold Schwarzenegger's Apprentice ratings
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Japanese antidote for overwork is taking "inemuri" naps in public. As opposed to the U.S. where it's called the Monday afternoon staff meeting
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop what this Slime gauge is attached to
source: images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Punxsutawney Phil sees shadow, predicts 6 more weeks of winter
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Punxsutawney Phil sees shadow, predicts 6 more weeks of winter
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Punxsutawney Phil sees shadow, predicts 6 more weeks of winter
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tales of the Cocktail)
 
 
 
Let us all give a toast to the bartender's handshake
source: talesofthecocktail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
If the cops show up at your home to arrest you on child pornography charges, it never looks good when they find you chopping up your tablet with a hatchet
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Lawnmowers kill seven times more people than refugees from Islamic countries. Trumpy planning on deporting Kubota back to Japan for the safety of 'Murica
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Groundhog.org)
 
 
 
Okay campers, rise and shine, and don't forget your booties 'cause it's cooooold out there today as America finds out whether there will be six more weeks of winter by pulling a rodent out of a hole on Groundhog Day. Live stream starting at 6 AM
source: groundhog.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
This Valentine's Day, why not give your lover a bouquet of beef jerky formed to look like flowers?
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Researchers reveal Punxsutawney Phil doesn't care whether it's winter or not, he only comes out of his hole because he wants to get some
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 613: "Frickin' Laser Beams". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed February 01, 2017
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
The lesson here is: Don't hand over your valuables to a stranger while you head off to have sex in the park, and then claim to have been robbed
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Father reunites with daughter he never knew after discovering she lives in same town and drinks at the same pub
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Lego brick made of 14 carat solid gold sells for £12,000, still hurts like a mofo when you step on it
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Presenting the world's first magazine devoted to redheads. Because "redheads are one of the smallest minorities all over the world and they have this special look which almost everyone reacts to"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Your problem is obvious, if we're gauging the situation correctly
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Before you call the police to report a strange drilling sound, make damn sure it's not your vibrator going wild in the bathtub
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier-Journal)
 
 
 
Turns out that convoy that drove through Louisville flying a Trump flag on Sunday belonged to a Navy Special Warfare unit. No, that's not ominous at all
source: courier-journal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Teacher fired for working as porn actress more than 16 years ago says she didn't expect the district to shtupp so low
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Canadian billionaire denies he's been kidnapped by the Chinese secret police, the most professional, most polite, world-class secret police force in the world
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
Sure your dog wants steak, but this deer wants fresh baked cookies and buns
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this human furball
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSMV Nashville)
 
 
 
US recalls smokeless tobacco for sharp metal objects, to be re-branded as "Skoal with Iron"
source: wsmv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Prison guards reportedly held hostage inside Delaware prison
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Dawwwwwwwwwww... Cute red panda cubs go exploring at the Lincoln Park Zoo. Yes Subby said 'cute' red panda cubs
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Today)
 
 
 
The Westminster Dog Show has added a new category: Alt-Dogs
source: today.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Woman quits her job and sets up her own business catching wild alligators - saying they're not scary just 'misunderstood.' Come back next year when 'Stumpy' updates us on her experiences
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass jaguar twins a surprise birth at a zoo because the couple didn't hit it off
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
If you ever wanted an authentic Mayor McCheese or Hamburglar playground ride for your backyard, now is your chance
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Nun gets death threats after suggesting the Virgin Mary wasn't a virgin after all and had sex with Joseph
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Hemingway, on writing: "All you have to do is write one true sentence. Write the truest sentence you know." Okay, here goes: "THIS is your Fark Writers' thread"
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSPA)
 
 
 
What carries a 20 year jail sentence in Virginia? a) Robbery b) Assault or c) Setting a potted plant on fire?
source: wspa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Ok, you've already got a bunch of face tattoos but you've been sitting in jail on murder charges since 2015. What would you do? What. Would. You. Do?
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this simple farmer and his horse
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Conversation)
 
 
 
Study: Frog tongues are amazing in the sack
source: theconversation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Fast food wrapper chemicals linked to kidney and testicular cancer, elevated cholesterol, decreased fertility, thyroid problems, changes in hormone functioning, adverse developmental effects, and decreased immune response in children." I'M LOVIN' IT
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
Think your HOA is bad? This one is trying to stop a guardrail being built after six cars crash into a house
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Wanted: One new guided-missile cruiser captain, as the current job holder is going to get his ass fired shortly
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Woman illustrates why she was kicked off Spirit Airlines
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deslidefied)
 
 
 
Haven't seen one of these on Fark in a while so here's the return of mugshot roundup. Come in for number 2, stay for 4,5,12 and 14. Bonus: deslidified for your viewing pleasure
source: deslide.clusterfake.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Snopes)
 
 
 
Reports that Queen Elizabeth has legal authority to behead Donald Trump have been found to be false
source: snopes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
Six peepholes were found in a North Carolina men's rest stop bathroom. Who hasn't had the fantasy of checking out fat truckers and retired old men relieving themselves
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Clickhole)
 
 
 
We put 700 red dots on a map to see if anyone would lose their shiat after seeing it
source: clickhole.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Substitute teacher discovers that commando cartwheels are not OK
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Green Bay Packers)
 
 
 
Billy Joel will play Lambeau Field in Wisconsin, marking the first time he's ever been in a building where he has fewer DUIs than the average person in the crowd
source: packers.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Woman stabs date, tries to eat his heart in quest to be serial killer. Turns out love is not all she's unlucky at
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Dispute over a man's last words, Giant Meteor's take on the election, and how to get less sleep. These are YOUR highest voted Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2017-01-22 to Sat 2017-01-28
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Oh. My. God. The U.S. Bacon Reserves have hit a fifty-year low. EVERYBODY PANIC AND STOCKPILE BACON
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Let's start drinking early since we didn't last Friday Afternoon. Little Bailey's in the coffee, maybe a mimosa, This is YOUR last Friday's Fark Weird News Quiz
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop what the man with the funny orange hair has drawn
source: imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRMG Tulsa)
 
 
 
Mother, father, and baby all have the same birthday, a 1-in-48 million odds of it happening (Edit: more like 1 in 133,225)
source: krmg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
There are many ways to decipher if a paper currency is fake, including examining the fibers, acid washing the ink, or noticing the words 'MOTION PICTURE USE ONLY' printed on one side
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Old man refuses to sell his giant 40-year-old cock bush
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(105.9 The Brew)
 
 
 
Forget the Doomsday Clock, the Rapture Index knows what time it is
source: 1059thebrew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
If you're the police commissioner, do your best not to smile in your mugshot after getting arrested for domestic violence
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Here's a look at everybody's favorite prison food: Nutraloaf: "It's not something you swallow easily. Basically, it's baked slop with surprise pineapple pieces"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue January 31, 2017
(Metro)
 
 
 
If a food truck is so filthy that you don't even want to touch the hygiene manual, it's filthy (pics)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Three Alaskans prove that if you can walk away from the landing it is a good landing. With photo which might say otherwise
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post (Australia))
 
 
 
Lady calls police when her dealer jacks up the price. No, not car dealer
source: huffingtonpost.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Not stolen parts / But weed instead / Has sealed your fate / You'll soon be dead .... Burma (oops, Myanmar) Shave
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Canada begins their invasion of US, one moose at a time
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
It takes a special kind of chef to whip up goat spinal cord and yak yogurt for 25
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Worst car advice of all time. OF. ALL.TIME
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
When the police report describes the color of your buttocks at 3:30am as "illuminated", maybe you need to spend a little more time outdoors in the sun
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Today)
 
 
 
Train trips can be comfortable enough to fall asleep on. This is bad news if you are the driver
source: japantoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Intercept)
 
 
 
So you want to know how the FBI works, huh? Good news, someone just slipped their secret rules to a reporter. "Based on a vague tip, the FBI can surveil anyone." Never mind, don't read, ignore that plane
source: theintercept.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these high fliers (and their little dog, too)
source: art-a-designer.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Old and busted: UFIA. New hotness: UPIA
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Your hotel was just hacked for a Bitcoin ransom. What do?
source: thelocal.at   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Havasu News)
 
 
 
Man stabbed with scissors after refusing threesome with woman from dog park
source: havasunews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Times)
 
 
 
Considered most unpopular of Big 8 Japanese cities, Nagoya asks public to submit catchphrase to lure tourists, highlighting city's status as mecca for sports tourism, cosplay and anime. Winner to get annual passes to Nagoya Castle and Legoland Japan
source: japantimes.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Duke's Grayson Allen tries to trip an opposing player again, fourth time this year. Duke Sucks
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
Electrical tape-bikinis and sun for perfect tan lines in -- hey, where'd everyone go?
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Hooters to add male servers and ditch revealing outfits with new venture 'Hoots'
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
The FDA is cracking down on rogue genetic engineers. Wait, that's a thing?
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop this dark hallway
source: pre09.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Not News: Nebraska's flag is bad Fark: It flew upside down outside the Capitol building for 10 days and nobody noticed
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Auto repair shop located below freeway off-ramp has customers literally falling out of the sky to get service. Fark: Eight times over the past nine years (Security footage of latest incident included)
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Virginian-Pilot)
 
 
 
'Ghost ship' found off of Cape Hatteras 96 years ago today remains a mystery, although suspicion currently rests on the six-toed cat
source: pilotonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Intense heat grips Australia as temperatures soar to 45 degrees centigrade. For those of you who don't speak metric, that's 113 degrees Fahrenheit or 98 wallabies per dinkum
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Good Samaritan beats off bus attacker with cane. Well, it's always nice to give someone a hand
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10TV Columbus)
 
 
 
Want to get your stolen car back quicker? Fake an Amber Alert
source: 10tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Leopold the cat vs. tiny drone in apartment match to the death
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Cheese accused in pizza delivery theft
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop this door in the wall
source: pre07.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
Neighbors at war over manure pile visible on Google Earth. The annual summer block party is going to be awkward this year
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Virginia considering new law that would impose a $250 fine on those recalcitrant a-holes who refuse to yield right of way to faster traffic in the left lane
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: I'm half-Latina, my mother full-blooded. My father is white. At Thanksgiving, I was having a discussion with another relative when my dad's aunt called me a Communist and started chanting 'Build that wall.' Should I write her off?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
"Naked pastor fled married woman's armed husband." Some headlines need no improvement
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
A sheriff's deputy decides to use a force machine in a high school robotics class to test the trigger pull on a couple of his handguns. The Dumbass tag gives you a hint on what happened next
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Don't worry, people of Arizona. The 2-mile long fissure opening up in the desert is nothing to worry about
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
It's hard to believe with everything going on these days, but 10 years ago today the city of Boston was completely terrorized by Lite-Brites with a cartoon figure giving people the finger. Yes, it was the Great Mooninite Panic of 2007
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon January 30, 2017
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Cat eats corn on the cob just like a human and as predicted in the Book of Revelation. Boy, those portents of Armageddon are just flying around this week
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo UK)
 
 
 
Mosque attacks, airport protests, imminent breakdown of civil society as we know it - you know what, fark today, let's get wasted, strap a GoPro to a sword and slice the shiat out of some watermelons and remind ourselves what makes America awesome
source: gizmodo.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Old man doesn't shout at clouds when his fishing mate dies of old age; he puts an ad in the newspaper to find a new one and becomes an overnight sensation
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Lutheran Church of Norway embraces same sex marriage. Baptist church of Norway insists that this is the slippery slope to man-lutefisk weddings
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
The risk of a cardiac event jumps 23% two days after major snowstorms ... (so do your shoveling 1 day after the storm)
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"Joggers are being attacked by a mystery yob who throws vegetables at them while they are running. Runners report being pelted with potatoes, eggs, turnips and even avocades in the drive-by attacks"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
NewsFlash
 
The person responsible for sacking the people ordering immigrants to be detained has been sacked
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: When life hands you lemons...
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Mormons plan to build huge city in Florida. In the far distant future it will war with the Clearwater Scientologists and they will merge and Florida will become the Church of the L. Joe Hubbard Smith's Mormontoloscientifics & Scientomormonologists
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this smart cetacean
source: 3.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Head of the Knights of Malta discovers that withstanding the might of the entire grand army of the Ottoman Empire is one thing. Standing up to a PO'ed Pope Francis is another matter entirely
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
Audio
 
At 8PM ET Paul's Memory Bank presents my 100th show "Request Night". Any TFers who put in a request in Sunday's thread will have their request granted. Still room for a couple more. DIT. LIT
source: beta.tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kinja)
 
 
 
Let's see how things are going in Detroit these days
source: oppositelock.kinja.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHO TV Des Moines)
 
 
 
Illinois men's daring plan to speed away from pursuing Des Moines cops foiled by running out of fuel 40 miles away near Pleasantville. Mugshots nevertheless in full color
source: whotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
PSA: You might want to proof-read that email you're sending to your son's school telling them you're "letting him off" for the day because autocorrect might change to "jerking him off"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Family members searching for the body of a murdered 21-year-old woman dig up a site suspected to be her grave and find a man's body. This is not a repeat from last week, when they dug up another site suspected to be her grave and found another man
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Cirquey Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lady and her tarn
source: bjgove.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
Things not to donate to a food bank or charity: mouldy dates; soiled underwear; 20-year-old syrup; beer keg; five samurai swords "and even a knuckleduster"
source: news.asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
George HW Bush released from hospital immediately after losing Obamacare coverage
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Scientists identify 540 million year old creature with huge mouth and no anus, hypothesize that it could be our earliest ancestor, or our 45th president
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Since "The Last Jedi" takes place immediately following the end of "The Force Awakens," what the hell is the opening crawl going to say?
source: io9.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Aging Gen-Xer's keeping it real with drunken wheelchair skitching
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you get up in the morning and you see a tiny ring set up in your back yard, that can only mean one thing: there's gonna be a squirrel fight (awesome pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
*beeeyerrrrooooooo wak wak*
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this orange drink
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Tornado that kills four, rips through chapel and leaves Bible unscathed and open to appropriate bible lesson. What would be more impressive if the Bible had managed to prevent those four people from dying
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Man sneaks into zoo to avoid paying entrance fee. His egress happened to be the tiger enclosure, and now someone will have to pay for his funeral
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
California's weed economy is valued at $7 BILLION. Whoa dude
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
When garden parties go bad. Six German teens died from possible carbon monoxide poisoning while partying in a garden shed
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsChannel 5 Nashville)
 
 
 
McDonald's Big Mac Sauce bottles listed at up to $50K on eBay
source: newschannel5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KJRH Tulsa)
 
 
 
Seven bricks of cocaine found in nose of American Airlines plane at TIA
source: kjrh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Former stable girl who became a lottery winner's mistress and ruined his marriage decided the perfect time to abscond with 30 horses valued at around $500,000, a sports car, and cash was when he was visiting his ex-wife and kids
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Culinary arts colleges shutting down because anyone can watch the tube and figure out how to cook nowadays
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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