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Sun November 13, 2016
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Expert claims chemtrails will wipe out humans, cause biblical-style floods. Yeah, sounds legit
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Do you want ninjas? Because that's how you get ninjas
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Christmas comes early for divorce lawyers: AdultFriendFinder hack discloses 300 million accounts
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(THV 11)
 
 
 
"Hey, remember that time I pulled you over for doing 107mph and then realized you were the police chief so I let you go? Ha ha. Yeah, good times"
source: thv11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this exciting athletic event
source: c2.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Child's Play Charity)
 
 
 
Years ago I found this from Fark. I look forward to it now. Thanks Farkers. Desert Bus for Hope
source: desertbus.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Last call
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Paul McCartney didn't die 50 years ago
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: Create an award for winning a Photoshop Contest
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
How about no
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Subby asks: "Is there a spell that works to turn me into a mermaid? I'm looking for serious answers only, so don't come in here claiming mermaids don't exist. I don't need your negativity"
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Moscow Times)
 
 
 
"Is this the famed Soviet Star of Voronezh?" "No, this is Patrick"
source: themoscowtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Ringleader pleads guilty after getting stuck with evidence in the $18 million Canadian Maple Syrup Heist. Our long national nightmare is over
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
Local police subjected to no-knock raid ... by the FBI and State Police
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Charges in Waffle House sex tape case scattered, smothered, covered
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
You'll never guess which state is facing a huge teacher shortage
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this eyelash
source: static.webshopapp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scary Mommy)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Cheers
source: scarymommy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Irreplaceable 18th century statue at a museum in Portugal becomes the victim of typically 21st century fate ... the tourist selfie
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Some people just want to watch Ontario burn
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Trying to decide where to move to now that Donald Trump has become the president-elect? Well, today is your lucky day: there are towns that will actually pay you to live there
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Remember the UK man who made the difficult decision to euthanize his 18-year-old dog and wanted to spend the final day walking with him on the beach? Well, hundreds of animals lovers with their pets came to help him take the final sad walk
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Incidents of pro-Trump violence are few and scattered. One here, one there, only 137 isolated incidents so far
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
New Zealand slammed by 7.4 magnitude quake just 59 miles from Christchurch, which is still recovering from the 2011 earthquake that killed 185 people
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Elohim)
 
 
 
The 60 richest people on Earth are now secretly building an underground complex that can withstand any nuclear, chemical or biological world war or world revolution. You can be assured this bit of info is 100% true as it comes from ElohimLeaks
source: elohimleaks.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
FARC Yes
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Trump has won a smaller percentage of votes than Mitt Romney. Tag is for everyone
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming up at the top of the hour it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Two hours of eclectic music hosted live by a farker (9PM AKST/10PM PST)
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat November 12, 2016
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Cemetery beekeeping operation sells honey named "The Sweet Hereafter" because there's nothing better than death honey
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Not only do Russian children have to trudge miles through the snow to get to school, they have to carry axes to fight off hungry wolves
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local 8 Knoxville)
 
 
 
You are not going to be an escaped inmate for long when you look like this
source: local8now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Hate mathematics? You're not alone. Even physicists who are generally skilled in it are scared by it
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
The bizarre reason there are always more yellow Skittles than any other flavour. The (yellow) Sun is there
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Silly Guy)
 
 
 
Life has been way too serious of late, so Photoshop this silly dog into something fun
source: clipartkid.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKYC Cleveland)
 
 
 
If your candidate didn't win here's how to remove that bumper sticker
source: wkyc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Area Man)
 
 
 
Man discovers he can't ride in the engine compartment of a driverless car without hitting a building
source: ksal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Good News Network)
 
 
 
America has a new hero: The Girl with the Unusually Large Cabbage
source: goodnewsnetwork.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Economist)
 
 
 
Germany has its own spin on "sovereign citizens," though more organized because Germany
source: economist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
Weeners
 
Just a story about a man rushed to the hospital with a chopstick stuck in his penis
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Oklahoma votes to repeal Prohibition
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Today is National Pizza Day. Arguments about who has the best pizza to the right. (Hint: It's Chicago, haters)
source: nationaldaycalendar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mock rescue
source: media2.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
79-year-old father (who's battling cancer) says it's time for assisted living. What should subby be on the lookout for when visiting various places? All tips and advice welcome
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Indy100)
 
 
 
Every British swear word officially ranked (Damn Not safe for work)
source: indy100.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 New Orleans)
 
 
 
If You're a tax commissioner there is one thing you should remember to do
source: fox8live.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 5 Arizona)
 
 
 
You just stole a box of Miss America crowns. Now what?
source: cbs5az.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLWT)
 
 
 
Judge declares mistrial for former Cincinnati officer who killed driver in traffic stop
source: wlwt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Proof Aussies are descended from convicts: Crooks steal Sydney man's cash and laptop while his Ferrari goes up in flames
source: au.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Sperm whale vomit is kind of like your cat's hairball, except it's worth three million dollars
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
World power with very large army building a new military base right near the border of Best Korea. Fark: The northern border of Best Korea
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Esquire)
 
 
 
In the Saturday Morning Book Club, we talk a lot about classic books. But what about the new stuff? What new book(s) have you read this year that you think the rest of us should know about?
source: esquire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
"Pedestrians know that drivers typically have no interest in running them down. So why not simply step out into the street and assert the right of way?"
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tales of the Cocktail)
 
 
 
Not sure what type of vermouth is best for you? Here's a handy flowchart
source: talesofthecocktail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
New Zealand build its first penguin-crossing tunnel. The ribbon cutting ceremony is expected to be a black tie affair
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Changes we can expect to see at the White House once Trump moves in
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Used Corolla. Runs good. Some dents
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
A group of fourth graders are being credited with saving a kitten from certain death by stopping a woman who was attempting to drown it. Somebody tell these kids that they are more than welcome on Caturday
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
News anchor shreds the media's last vestiges of respectability by saying she prayed for a Trump victory and as much as she hates to say it, the number of African Americans killing one another far outweighs the number of them being killed by whites
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFist)
 
 
 
Looks like I picked the wrong week to start harassing people on airplanes
source: sfist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
"It's tradition for him to have his guns brought to him around hunting season so he can get them out and go through the whole process of cleaning them and getting them ready. And then the guns are put away until the next year." Not anymore
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
We're not saying cats are dicks, but they will sit on another cat's head just to get a better view looking out the window
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Measure to remove fluoride from the drinking in water in Maine wins by the skin of its rotten, rickety, cavity-pocked teeth
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
With their fourth night of televised coverage, Portland anti-Trump riots are longer running than most of the new Fall TV shows
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Man who set up camp in front of a Best Buy explains why he has to be the first in line Black Friday deals. "I just can't have nobody taking my spot. It is a competition"
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Daily News)
 
 
 
YouTube video star pleads guilty for faking a hate crime, since there isn't a jury in the country that would convict anyone for assaulting a YouTube star
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
There are better ways to pick up followers on Facebook than by purposely starting a wildfire to draw attention to your videos
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri November 11, 2016
(Fark)
 
 
 
Welcome back, everybody, to the latest installment of the Fark Weird News Quiz, now with more than just scotchy scotch scotch
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billboard)
 
 
 
China reacts to the results of the presidential election with censorship and mocking of the U.S. Or as it's otherwise known in China, Wednesday
source: billboard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Venture Beat)
 
 
 
Legend has it that if you die on Facebook, you die in real life
source: venturebeat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Exeter Express & Echo)
 
 
 
You know that scene where the plumber comes by and starts chatting up the teen girl? From his van? At 70 mph?
source: exeterexpressandecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
It's raining men in Glasgow
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Yes, this is a 'do it yourself' store, but no, that's not what they mean
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
The dress is blue-and-black, that was Bill Murray, and this is a dog
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Scorned lovers. Millions of dollars of missing artwork. Florida
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Boat captain rescues dog who swam for two miles after jumping from sea wall. Your dog wants a life jacket
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
The best sex-tape scandals are the ones where the couples met at church
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Killer Russian robot that can detect and kill people from miles away is now a thing
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these proud harvesters
source: eveestuary.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WYFF 4 Greenville)
 
 
 
Johnson exposes Johnson
source: wyff4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Here's a list of amazing things that have happened in 2016 to balance out all the recent crap
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 New York)
 
 
 
Prohibition couldn't shut down McSorley's, but the NYC Health Department has
source: fox5ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Fear proliferates among African-Americans in Richmond after election. This is not a repeat from 1861
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"You're riding along, minding your own business and then 'thwack.' You feel the sharp dig of claws and wings against the back of your helmet, and there's a horrible dry scream right in your ear and you realise that a magpie has hit you from behind"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WREG Memphis)
 
 
 
Memphis called buckle of the stroke belt, and not the good kind
source: wreg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Straits Times)
 
 
 
Singapore launches major military exercise, reminds drivers that for the next week, F-15s have the right of way on Singapore highways (pics)
source: straitstimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Invoice, invoice, complaint, invoice, Légion d'Honneur medal, invoice, inv....wait. What?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJLA Washington DC)
 
 
 
43 year old Navy seal dies at National Zoo
source: wjla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hong Kong Standard)
 
 
 
A woman in Portland splashed laundry detergent on protesters last night. This is the first recorded use of the little known martial art of Tide-kwon-do
source: thestandard.com.hk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these people you're probably going to miss in a year or so
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 5 Arizona)
 
 
 
If you like Ramen you can now take a bath in it
source: cbs5az.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
All aboard the Twilight Express
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Guy gets on the subway and smokes Fentanyl in a crack pipe. Kids call it a High Roller
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
A man shoots a deer that was in neighbor's backyard and then drives his SUV right through their backyard to take the deer
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
The Dutch are torn about whether it's okay to celebrate Christmas in blackface as they traditionally do
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
How to turn a horse into a mule
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
After 18 years, UK man makes the difficult decision to euthanize his dog, asks others to join in for its last walk on the beach
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Air Bacon
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
But how would you pull the trigger...?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Want some mugshot goodness to start the weekend? Check out this group courtesy of a prostitution sting
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
New entry on the seemingly endless list of Australian animals that want to kill you: goats
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Marijuana vending carts still illegal in Canada, even if you declare 'No Minors' on it in stick-on letters
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CP24 Toronto)
 
 
 
Hey, free chickens
source: cp24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hold the Front Page)
 
 
 
British consumers introduced to naga pepper pizza: "One bite and I was in pieces. It's the hottest thing I've ever tasted. My tongue was on fire, my face was boiling and my hair was soaking wet. I will never eat anything with chilli in it again"
source: holdthefrontpage.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
World's first commercially available jetpack is now on sale to 'well qualified buyers'
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Whoever thought fishing could be so sexy?
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Today is Veterans Day. 'Nuff said
source: en.m.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
If you committed a crime and had the option of going to prison for five years or getting transformed into a cat for three years, which one would you choose?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
San Diego Farkers welcome a EuroFarker to America's Finest City
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Women if you've got an extra $50k laying around, maybe you want to get out of this hellhole we call America and marry a Swedish dude
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Auto-erotic asphyxiation
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Great Falls Tribune)
 
 
 
If you unsuccessfully try to hotwire someone's pickup, don't leave a citation for an earlier crime behind in the cab
source: greatfallstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Subby: "You know what we haven't had on Fark in a long time?" Cat: "Meow?" Subby: "No, we haven't had a tipping thread." Cat: (licks self) Subby: "Exactly. Maybe the admins are distracted and think this is a cat story"
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Oh man, this kid is soooo grounded (Warning: graphic images)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Commonwealth)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flying contraption
source: fedora.digitalcommonwealth.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Not sure what they were thinking when they made a kid's toy based entirely around a sausage
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Does no good fleeing from police during traffic stop, jump out of still moving vehicle, leap into canal, drown. They'll just pull drag you out from those dank waters, bring you back from brink of death to get that ticket
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
Everything's going to be oKKK
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WUSA9)
 
 
 
As punishment for them screwing up the election (again) God smites Florida with a rare type of bedbug not seen in over 60 years
source: wusa9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
The good news is that Sheriff Joe Arpaio is out of a job. The bad news is that Trump's Department of Homeland Security is hiring
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Public sector worker who didn't show up to work for more than 10 years appeals decision to freeze his salary because he is 'quite upset about it'
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
George Zimmerman viciously persecuted just for exercising his First Amendment rights in a way that was in no way deplorable or racist
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Lindstrom, Minnesota voters re-elect beloved, but dead, councilman
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
We can now return to our regularly scheduled Bad Mom programming from our favorite state (with mugshot)
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Times)
 
 
 
Police bust foot licker who held his victim by the ankle and nibbled and licked her heel and sole for over 30 minutes. "The woman in the latest case managed to use her mobile phone to record at least some of the ordeal"
source: japantimes.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Add the Unitarians to the list of minority groups in America terrified over what a Trump presidency could bring
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Former McDonald's and KFC workers reveal what you should never eat there
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Another perfect symbol for America in 2016
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu November 10, 2016
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Of course, Disney engineer makes learning fun at Boys & Girls Club robotics camp. He gets to play with life-sized dolls while us regular engineers just blow things up
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Spartans become snowflakes
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
UNF coed answers Craigslist ad for babysitter, discovers pay way too high, baby way too old
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Art Newspaper)
 
 
 
Skeleton of Paul Gauguin's father has been found. Who was even looking for it?
source: theartnewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British pensioner fails at playing "The Floor is Lava" game
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man marries his pet snake because he believes it to be his dead girlfriend reincarnated
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Universities work to comfort their students post-election by offering "cry-ins," comfort dogs, and floor-sprawl time with Play-doh and coloring books in the Student Affairs office. Difficulty: Article not plagiarized from The Onion
source: blogs.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Memphis)
 
 
 
Rare birthmark's four-generation streak has mom teaching her daughter to outrun amorous French skunks
source: fox13memphis.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local 8 Knoxville)
 
 
 
Green Acres is the place for me
source: local8now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
Yourenothelping.jpg
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Recycling International)
 
 
 
The Navy is having a hard time getting rid of the mothballed USS Independence because it's too fat to fit through the Panama Canal
source: recyclinginternational.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
People are setting fire to the New Balance shoes today to teach Trump a lesson
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Noooooooooooooooope (Article contains graphic image)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
Closing time. Leonard Cohen passes away at 82
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
British government puts 1,200 of their best-trained soldiers on 24-hour standby for the next five months in case they have to defend Britain from winter
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these acrobatic squirrels
source: files.brightside.me   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Radio 102.3 Portland)
 
 
 
Man that smuggled $165K of gold in his rectum also had a gold finger
source: radio1023.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
The Dutch are also struggling with the biggest prison crisis in their history, because they've run out of people to send to jail
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
What rough beast, its hour come round at last, slouches towards Bethlehem to be born? Well, I dunno either, but THIS is your Fark Writer's Thread, the 'somewhat delayed by election madness' edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Economist)
 
 
 
Bored of wearing a crappy plastic poppy for Nov. 11? Why not wear one made out of shell fuses fired during the battle of the Somme (£39.99) or cufflinks incorporating earth from various First World War battlefields (£79.99 a pair)?
source: economist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AutoExpress (UK))
 
 
 
Drivers over 65 are most likely to drive through flood water because they know there's a lawn underneath there someplace
source: autoexpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star (Lebanon))
 
 
 
Mexico's Pres, "Well yes, we'd be willing to negotiate a 'modern' version of NAFTA.'" Translated for the Mexican ruling class: "Hay un nuevo sheriff en la ciudad"
source: dailystar.com.lb   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Potomac Local)
 
 
 
Six gang members and an elf arrested for murder
source: potomaclocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
If you were a guest at a Thanksgiving dinner table, what would you love to see besides a perfectly cooked turkey. Do you like classic American sides, like green bean casserole and stuffing? Or do you like unique sides with global flavors and spices?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Channel)
 
 
 
Happy Birthday, U.S. Marine Corps. Semper Fi
source: history.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Spain's new prime minister proposes a ban on all memes. Sounds like a Fark challenge to me
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this morning dandelion
source: files.brightside.me   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Woman who once got stuck in a bath because of her HH breasts starts crowdfunder to have them reduced
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Man tries fleeing cops at 165 mph. And he would have gotten away with it too, if only he remembered to fill up his motorcycle tank with gas beforehand
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
One of the upsides of the Brexit vote is that at least people in Britain will get bread properly toasted in energy-inefficient toasters
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Miami)
 
 
 
21 Florida kids sickened and rushed to the hospital. Doctors immediately rule out overexertion from exercise
source: miami.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
The last person to vote in America on Election Night was a Alaskan teacher in the remote town of Adak out on the Aleutian chain
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IFL Science)
 
 
 
So which country drinks the most alcohol anyway? Hint: it's not any country that starts with "The Islamic Nation of "
source: iflscience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Man and woman stole 68 bras worth almost $4,000 from Victoria's Secret. Police seek support
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Channel)
 
 
 
Turns out that the puritans didn't just see witches flying through the night skies. They saw aliens
source: history.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo UK)
 
 
 
You can now get your teeth fixed by the world's first sex dentist
source: gizmodo.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Science)
 
 
 
Want to breathe cleaner air? Just wear this mask full of spiders on your face
source: popsci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It is apparently too late to stop killer robots. Not even if you try to reason with them. Or bargain. They don't feel pity or remorse. Game over man. Number 5 is alive
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Polish army launches free nationwide classes to teach women unarmed combat
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Smoking hot 29-year-old single mother discovers secret to not catching the flu is drinking sperm smoothies: "It can taste really good - depending on what my friend has been eating. My other mates think I'm strange, but I don't give a toss" (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Los Angeles: Go be homeless somewhere else
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
The election reactions have resulted in friendships being torn apart. On Facebook
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
State Department warns that tourism may be funding North Korea's nuclear weapons program. Wait, North Korea has tourism?
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Young woman regrets getting tattoo of her personal motto (mildly not safe for work)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Wicked Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop YOUR FACE into one of these dual image illusions. Link goes to an example
source: illusions.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
It's probably for the best that Ralph didn't know who would end up as President
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFSB Connecticut)
 
 
 
Grammar Nazi can't live without U
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Sweden's Treehotel is branching out with a seventh room
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRON 4)
 
 
 
Shiat's on fire, Oakland
source: kron4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PetaPixel)
 
 
 
Good PR: getting photographers at your charity car race -- Bad PR: assaulting a photographer
source: petapixel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
When taking a taxi to burglarize a house it is best to pay the driver
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 601: "Libations". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed November 09, 2016
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Hard to say which is worse: that the male lecturer decides halfway through class to strip totally naked, or that his subject is microscopic anatomy (Not safe for work content in sidebar/below article)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Ever wonder why Coke at McDonald's tastes better than at other fast food joints? Here comes the science
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this electrifying experience
source: drse.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBIR Knoxville)
 
 
 
Behold the power of this fully operational play room. Tag is for subby's nephew who is the cancer patient in the article
source: wbir.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
Weeners
 
Australian man faces $9000 fine for using a drone to pick up sausage at hardware store. In other news: You can buy sausage at hardware stores in Australia
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSAZ West Virginia)
 
 
 
Man faces animal cruelty charges after learning why you should always put your teeth up on the windowsill
source: wsaz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop the Zippomobile
source: popmeh.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
If you had placed a £5 treble bet on Leicester winning the title, the UK voting for Brexit and Donald Trump triumphing in the race to be President of the United States, today you'd be counting up a staggering £15million ($18.6 million)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Are you living in a third-world country and looking forward to your World Series Champions Indians t-shirts? Well, bad news. Also, how are you reading fark right now?
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Did recent experiments at CERN's Large Hadron Collider cause the recent earthquakes in Italy? No, of course not. But that's never stopped the conspiracy theorists
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL (UK))
 
 
 
Typical train delays: weather, livestock, stuck track switching. Atypical train delays: naked guy performing a rap song on the tracks
source: travel.aol.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Dewey defeats Truman. Again
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
New study says that dangerous driving runs in families. Which means we should immediately revoke the driver's licenses of the children of Nick Nolte, Mel Gibson and Billy Joel
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
How to move to Canada
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark Shop)
 
 
 
Fark Store Daily Deal: Brain.fm. Artificial Intelligence composer "designed with the brain of a neuroscientist and the heart of a musician". Music created with science to improve focus, meditation, and sleep. (Sponsored Link)
source: deals.fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
"Only in Toronto could 20 people witness a man having his penis cut off followed by five gunshots and no one saw or heard anything"
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: If rock stars were really gods
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
I'm not saying that how we're imagining aliens is wrong, but how we're imagining aliens probably is wrong
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Jersey 101.5)
 
 
 
New Jersey couple stuffs highway toll baskets to prevent coins from dropping, goes back later to pick up the money, forgets that there are surveillance cameras rolling
source: nj1015.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Press censorship under President Trump has just begun
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
There's a special place in Hell for anyone who steals from a woman while she's in labor
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Samsung offices raided in investigation involving a dressage horse gifted to the daughter of the president of South Korea
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Boston)
 
 
 
Man who attacked a grocery store clerk told a responding officer that he was a "vampire, ghost rider, Captain Jack Sparrow from Pirates of the Caribbean, Mr. Miyagi from the Karate Kid, and a leader of a band
source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Cheer up California, Massachusetts, and Florida farkers. At least you can stay stoned for the next four years
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Caption this canine's thoughts
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClearPolitics)
 
 
 
Orange is the New Black thread 2 - Orange Harder
source: realclearpolitics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
What 2016 has taught us: Hate Sells
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Trump Brexits the world: Asian markets crater, U.S. markets fall, currencies dive, Peso falters, Fear Proxies such as the U.S. dollar, gold and bonds rosey-cheeked and sunny at prospect of battening on the USA's bleaching bones. Thanx, dumbasses
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
...and Trump supporters have already begun firing their guns in the air across America
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Journal)
 
 
 
Meanwhile, Canada has ebola
source: digitaljournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fansided)
 
 
 
Not trying to instill U.S. panic, but the Canada immigration website has just crashed
source: fansided.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canadian government proposes draining an entire lake in Banff National Park for the winter to save the trout who live in it
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
We're running out of headlines... but we're still going... Election Thread #10 right here for ya
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
The crazy train rolls on.... Election Thread #9
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
The Canadian Immigration website has crashed, but we haven't. It's your 2016 election thread #8
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Have you ever walked through an art gallery and thought "this experience would be better if I could take my pants off"? Well you're in luck
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue November 08, 2016
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Alec Baldwin sighs, pulls out the wig and make up, asks Lorne if he can broadcast from Canada. It's your Election Thread #7
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Every year some hunter gets mistaken for a deer and accidentally shot. However, they're usually not halfway up a tree at the time
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
The Fark Thunderdome continues.... Election 2016 thread #6
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
Ohio man charged with trying to go to Libya to join ISIS, says at least the weather would be nicer than in Cleveland
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The Not a Damn Horse Race is a horse race again, as Americans start wondering how easy it is to sneak into Canada without being noticed. It's the Election Day Discussion Thread Part 5: Don't stop drinking
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Hotel guests sleep with a dead body under their bed for at least a week after a woman's body is discovered by cleaners. Thankfully the hotel did not charge the guests for an extra occupant
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
As demonstrated by the rise of Trump, zombies could overrun a city in no time
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Turns out nasty women really are nasty
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kare11)
 
 
 
Women claim man who romanced them under guise as war hero, doctor, lawyer, professor was really an imposter. Sounds like typical pick-up lines, less being member of Mossad
source: kare11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Hillary Clinton threatening to grab defeat from the pussy of victory. It's the Election Day Discussion Thread Part 4
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ottawa Citizen)
 
 
 
Headline: "Mint worker accused in rectal gold theft looks jovial on video". Well, who wouldn't?
source: ottawacitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 19 Cincinnati)
 
 
 
The house dressing comes on the side... the table... the ceiling... the carpet... the walls... the dress
source: fox19.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Disney apparently planning to massacre guests for Christmas with new holiday drone program
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Five Thirty-Eight)
 
 
 
An hour-by-hour guide to watching election night returns. Spoiler alert: You'll be passed out drunk before we even reach hour 2
source: fivethirtyeight.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
FYI in Alaska you can't post a selfie of your ballot, but you can open-carry to the voting booth *unless the property owner posts a sign
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The first waves of polls are closed, the weak livers are failing. It's the Election Day Discussion Thread Part 3: It's Time
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
No country in the world requires wedding photos to have a thick topping of Photoshop more than Russia
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Mexico)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flummoxed owl
source: sandianet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
I'm not saying it's Godzilla, but it's Godzilla
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Military.com)
 
 
 
And the F-35's latest trick: Catching fire in mid-air
source: military.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Two polling places on lockdown due to active shooter situation
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Man loses wedding band in garden, finds it three years later after it has grown an extra carrot
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
C U in the NT
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sputnik News)
 
 
 
Self-propelled Russian garbage fire in Mediterranean moves to war footing, prepares to roll coal in Aleppo's general direction
source: sputniknews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Spy)
 
 
 
Because there ARE important things happening in the rest of the world today: "TV presenter Lisa Snowdon admits she's 'curious' about kangaroo anus"
source: digitalspy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The pregame is over, the server hamsters are warming up, Subby's on his second pack of smokes and third bottle of gin, and the polls are starting to close. It's the Election Day Discussion Thread Part 2: Electric Boogaloo
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Chicken apprehended after crossing roads, will be taken downtown and grilled
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Woman posted revenge porn showing ex-boss naked on his new wife's business Facebook page. Her defense lawyer, Mr. Booty, says she just wanted to be heard
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Putin has decided Trump failed to secure the election
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Organizer of "Smack Fest" at bar sees no connection to the drunken brawl that erupted between participants
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man sues Donald Trump for $1 billion claiming campaign caused him emotional distress
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wave3 Louisville)
 
 
 
That time you baked cookies for the voters you were going to drive to the polls in a van until you found a dead body in it
source: wave3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Headline: Fracking isn't causing Oklahoma earthquakes. Article: Wastewater from fracking is causing Oklahoma earthquakes
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this dog washing station
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Cop painfully discovers that even a police dog trained to bite the first suspect it sees, sometimes gets confused
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Donald Trump just got trolled by a Jordanian airline that's offering an election day special to Middle Eastern tourists who want to "travel to the United States while you're still allowed to"
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Variety)
 
 
 
Things to remember today 1. Vote 2. Stephen Colbert will be uncensored on Showtime with election coverage tonight
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Fox News reports on Fox News' stunningly beautiful new television studio that will be featured tonight in Fox News' coverage of the election. Fox News
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
UK pub owner thinks that anyone 16 and older should be allowed to drink in a pub, claiming they would be less likely to fill up on cheap supermarket alcohol
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Who gets the center armrests on an airplane? Flight pros all agree on one thing -- oh wait, no they don't
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Judge orders the release of a chimpanzee ruling that it has "non-human" rights
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Black smoke seen over DC signals we do not yet have a new president
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier Mail)
 
 
 
Kid dies while hunting toads. A golf club randomly hits him on the noggin and he suffers severe injuries. The golfer also suffered as he took a three stroke penalty
source: couriermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
"Dad, I'm pretty sure this is a strip club." "Shut up Timmy, this is where they said I was supposed to vote, and vote I shall"
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(From the Grapevine)
 
 
 
This winter the only thing saving you from depression could be a gerbil
source: fromthegrapevine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Write the concession speech for the losing candidate, not the speech we want, but the speech we need to heal
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
If you're going to the airport to watch jets take off and land, bring along a radio so you can talk to the pilots
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Aaaaaaaaaaaaand we have our first assault at a Florida polling place (with photo)
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
The absolutely best advertisement this political season. Watch this before you vote today, and you'll be assured of the effectiveness of your democratic process and know that our republic will endure. Bonus a cute redhead
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"We live in the first shipping container in the world to have a stained glass window"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Ever wonder why you don't see much grape ice cream? Here comes the science
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 San Diego)
 
 
 
44 undocumented immigrants found locked in backyard shed. Someone didn't get the memo that Trump victory parties don't start till tonight
source: fox5sandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
Remember the squirrel attack at the Florida senior community? There was a second attack, but this time the seniors stood their ground
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
FDA approves first drug to treat anxiety in dogs. Your dog wants a valium, some benzos and a beer
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
And the first vote cast is a perfect metaphor for this election season
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Crazy)
 
 
 
"If the psychologist doesn't become a vegan, this is clear evidence that they can't possibly understand the extent of the vegan's distress"
source: veganpsychologist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
As America goes off to vote, the rest of the world watches and waits the results in a state that can be best described as "pants-shiatting terror"
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Waiter, there's a bug in my sandwich
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pub band
source: cdn3.spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Thanks to legalization, U.S. weed is better and stronger and Mexico wants it
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
The time for mudslinging and handwringing and genital grabbing is done. The Bataan Election March finally comes to an end as the people of the United States go to vote and collect their stickers. This is the Election Day discussion thread, part 1
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Eleven reasons why South Jersey is better than Best Jersey (slideshow)
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Not to be outdone by an awkward swan taking out rail service in Britain, an SF BART station was shut down today because someone got a shoe caught in an escalator
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Jurors send a $37 million message to Flint, Michigan Police concerning police brutality
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Madrid opens 'Robin Hood' restaurant that will feed the homeless with the profits from paying customers. "The idea is not to rob from the rich to feed the poor, but to share"
source: thelocal.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsChannel 5 Nashville)
 
 
 
Man chops off snake's head then makes the bad decision to pick it up
source: newschannel5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Great. Now even the world of high-end artisan honey has been infiltrated by gangsters
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
If you've always enjoyed that as a nation we collectively vote on a Tuesday, you can thank farmers who were too busy going to church on Sunday and market on Wednesday
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deslidefied)
 
 
 
Drag queens perform 'Seniors in Heat' show to benefit Seattle charity. Deslidified, because things are already slippery enough when you mix heels and Geritol
source: deslide.clusterfake.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Evidence of Russian giants involved in snowball fight
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Listen up you apathetic voters, if a guy can vote from space so can you. VOTE Earthlings
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon November 07, 2016
(SFGate)
 
 
 
The only winners of election day are these red pandas
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Someone apparently thought Jurassic Park was a good idea
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Lowest November temperatures in the UK in 100 years makes it colder than Moscow, with only slightly better food
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News24)
 
 
 
China pledges to cut 18% of its carbon emissions by 2020. Finally the air will be clean enough so that the people can read billboards telling them when air pollution warnings are in effect
source: news24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Amidst all the election coverage, here is your friendly reminder now is not the time to talk about gun violence
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MEL Magazine)
 
 
 
"Man Missing for a Decade Might Never Have Left This Bar." I say we canonize the dude
source: melmagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: It's finally here
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Cat blamed for putting syringe in kid's Halloween candy bag. "The cat isn't speaking"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
If it were an episode of "Criminal Minds," you'd roll your eyes and shut the TV off: Suspected serial killer who kidnapped a woman and left her chained in a box for two months left clues to his activities in Amazon product reviews--using Eagles lyrics
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: put a famous person in a hat (LGT to lots and lots of hats to choose from)
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
TEACHER: "Johnny, you don't have your homework, again? What's your excuse this time?"
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Medieval sin-washing well uncovered. Apparently it was buried under massive piles of deleted emails
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent Journal Review)
 
 
 
This week's episode of OD'd With Children brought to you by Latrobe, PA
source: ijr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
"Pumpkin Spice Cheese". Dear sweet lord
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Boston)
 
 
 
Eight people go to hospital after attempt to put out electrical fire with water
source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
If only there were a saying to cover this situation
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
In 2010 a woman scamming immigrants offered to pay $1.2 million to her victims to avoid prison. As of 2016, the state has $200,000, her victims have nothing, she's not paying, and nobody cares
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Minnesota)
 
 
 
Starting a fire, crashing through ceiling tiles, stealing a squad car, and going on a high speed chase isn't normal. But on meth it is... still pretty unusual
source: minnesota.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this woman on a train
source: c2.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
We'll continue this high school internet safety lecture after a brief message from Pornhub
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Virginian-Pilot)
 
 
 
There's only one clock master left in Hampton Roads. Really? Because I'm pretty good at-oh, CLOCK master
source: pilotonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Flight from Cancun to Frankfurt makes emergency landing in Jacksonville after man exposes his genitals and threatens to kill a 3-year-old boy. To be fair, it does really sound like he belongs in Florida
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
"A lot of Muslims are crossing the border disguised as Mexicans. They're buying up gas stations. What if they won't deliver gas? How could we drive to work?" Welcome to to conspiracy world, now supporting a candidate near you
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
"One of the most important sites in Australian pre-history" was discovered because some guy had to take a leak
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Northwest Arkansas News)
 
 
 
There's now one stoplight in this Arkansas county. Reviews are mixed
source: nwaonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Travel writer declares that being stuck in an airport is great, as you can hit the spa, golf simulator, massage chair, electronic shop, bar, designer stores, gift shop, sushi restaurant, and business lounge for only 12x your original ticket price
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Everyone go home, the mystical Chinese monkey has already predicted Donald Trump will be the next president of the United States. Book it done
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
"Puppies. Because election fatigue is real, y'all." This is a real article in a national newspaper... and we probably need it
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
 
 
Guy does 134 in a 35, hits and kills a woman, runs away, then is found dancing naked on a statue in the middle of a lake. Methinks drugs may have been involved. With "oh shiat" mugshot goodness
source: denver.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Psychic Scottish goat predicts next U.S. president
source: scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Hugging, playing with bears as natural as petting your dog, says lunch
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Welcome to The Family Feud. Top five answers up on the board. Name something that you smear on someone else's car
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Trump supporter at rally supports lynching reporters. Reporters report it. See? See?
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJAC TV Johnstown)
 
 
 
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, she sprang from the bed to see what was the matter. Away to the window she flew like a flash. Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash. That's when the stray bullet hit her she died shortly after
source: wjactv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Italian priest blames earthquakes on gay unions. Subby is wondering if that is the Teamsters or UAW
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Protip: If a stranger wants $300 in iTunes gift cards to fix your PC, you should be a little suspicious
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark Shop)
 
 
 
Fark Store Daily Deal: Fuji EnviroMAX AA and AAA batteries, 96- and 144-packs. Cadmium and PVC-free. And they're green. (Sponsored Link)
source: deals.fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Eater)
 
 
 
This is why we can't have nice things, but loads of donkey sauce instead
source: eater.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Perth Now)
 
 
 
Backpacker 'body slams' a crocodile after selfie photo attempt goes horribly wrong
source: perthnow.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(O' Really?)
 
 
 
Photoshop this unusual statue
source: huh.spb.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Russians tied to dope in race, pencilneck scientist dorks say the human brain is predisposed to negative stereotypes, and I'm Rick James, bench: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 10/30 - 11/5
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
In the latest internet craze that does nothing, and benefits no one, people are making short videos of themselves and their friends posed like mannequins. Here's a tissue so you can wipe your tears
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
I used to be a burglar until I took an arrow to the butt
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
There are eleven unusual things you can do with cremated remains including making a tattoo out of them, sending them into space, or turning them into a vinyl record. We bet you're dying to hear the rest
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Queensland Government)
 
 
 
Woman releases Drop Bear on arresting officers
source: mypolice.qld.gov.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Protecting your children, the wise and noble public servants of San Joaquin County, California put the hammer down on the looming menace of ceviche bootlegging
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
San Antonio cop learns that the "serve and protect" part of his job description does NOT entail serving a literal sh*t sandwich to a homeless man
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Responsible gun owner shoots self in leg. Twice
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
The music has stopped at Janet Reno's dance party
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Ball pit for adults: meh. Ball pit for adults with all-you-can-eat spaghetti in second floor restaurant: I'm listening. Ball pit for adults with all-you-can-eat spaghetti plus an hour of all-you-can-drink cocktails: I'm reserving my flight now
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man faces jail after police find octopus porn on his computer. SUCKERS
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Now ambulances are being used as bombs in Iraq by terrorists
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
Oookkkkklahhhhooommmmmmaaaa
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
18 year-old girl selling vag shoots to stardom online. Wait, veg. Not vag
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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