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Sun October 09, 2016
(Science Blogs)
 
 
 
Okay, but seriously, this year's Nobel Prize-winners in physics really do look like Doctor Who, David Crosby and Jerry Garcia
source: scienceblogs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
You ever wonder why so many English TV crime dramas are set in tiny English villages? "They're real-life hotbeds of "hatred, mistrust, anger, bitterness and suspicion"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"I respect his kids." "She doesn't quit. She doesn't give up." Town Hall debate wrapup thread
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Town Hall debate thread #5: There simply are no words
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Honest Abe v. Lie-ary Clinton v. Trumped Up Storytime. Town Hall debate thread #4
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
I'm rubber and you're glue. Town Hall debate thread #3
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Orange Crush or Trumpster Fire? Grab your drink by the...uh, just uh, drink up. We're gonna do this live. Town Hall Debate thread #2
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these Hillbilly Handfishers
source: eastfieldnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The presidential race is heating up and October is full of surprises guaranteed to grab you right in the whatever as Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton face off Town Hall style in the second presidential debate, 9 PM ET on pretty much every major channel
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Bad: Water pipe bursts in underground car park. Good: Expanding foam lifts cars out of water. Worse: And crushes them against roof
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"When you think about it, being on board an aircraft is really one of the only situations in which it's vaguely socially acceptable to day-drink by yourself. So people do"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
As God as my witness, Arkansasians are a bunch of dumbasses
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mysterious gold object
source: media3.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Herald Scotland)
 
 
 
Head of anti-stalking charity charged with.... go on, guess
source: heraldscotland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Extra Crispy)
 
 
 
You're not cool until your favorite cereal is Quisp. Understand this importance in life
source: extracrispy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Graffiti artists complain Detroit is no longer the graffiti capital of the world: "Detroit was considered by many to be the graffiti capital of the US, and perhaps the world-a vast playground where writers could paint undisturbed in broad daylight"
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
It is fall in Manhattan and the annual migration of the lox slicers is underway
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Man explains apartment fire with perfectly logical explanation
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Herald Scotland)
 
 
 
That's a mighty expensive drink
source: heraldscotland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
What cuss words are most popular in your state? Here's a handy f*cking map
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canberra Times)
 
 
 
Report your under-aged daughter's sexts to the police? Congrats, you're on the sex offender register
source: canberratimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Hurricane Matthew may have just eradicated Zika from Florida, so think positive, I guess
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCRG)
 
 
 
Don't want your neighbor's house to look like a football stadium? Sue 'em
source: kcrg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Turner)
 
 
 
Photoshop Michelle Obama's new armrest
source: i2.cdn.turner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: I'm never drinking again
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Forget the steak for now, your dog wants pot
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Woman throws a party after taking her faithful companion to get neutered
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Fisherman)
 
 
 
The Coast Guard just rescued five fishermen from a sinking boat, including the dyslexic fisherman who like to fish for crap
source: northcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sacred Artichoke)
 
 
 
Due to car trouble our host isn't in the studio tonight, but for your listening enjoyment here is an archived Livingston Stapler Company Presents show from September 28, 2014
source: sacredartichoke.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat October 08, 2016
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
1966: "The future is plastic." 2016: "The future is no plastic"
source: interactive.nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
How many of the world's 50 best bars have you visited ...if you can remember?
source: insidescoopsf.sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Three police officers shot in Palm Springs, CA. Two killed, one wounded; manhunt ongoing
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Photoshop these heron hunters
source: nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Police in Germany find several hundred grams of explosives in what is being called a thwarted terror attack
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
While most people were fleeing Hurricane Matthew ... there was this guy
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Hurricane Matthew makes landfall in South Carolina
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Rock God)
 
 
 
Photoshop this rocking silhouette
source: clipartkid.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
Littoral combat ship towed out to sea to avoid damage from hurricane ... severely damaged by being towed
source: sandiegouniontribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
National Weather Service says that Hurricane Matthew could make parts of Florida uninhabitable for months. Residents of Detroit: "You'll get used to it"
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metronews.ca)
 
 
 
Good clowns decry the wave of creepy clown sightings. Say it's bad for business. Doo Doo the clown, has been clowning for about 35 years and was hailed as a hero after rescuing two women from an attack in 2015. Doo Doo, heh-heh, heh-heh
source: metronews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Grizzly bear conservationist John Craighead dies at 100; in other news, grizzly bear conservationists can live to be 100 if they know when to get the fark away from grizzly bears
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
You might need to do some yard work this weekend if somebody mows "F*ck You" in your lawn
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
British police advice for civilians with clown reports? Ignore them: "Firstly I'd like to stress that it isn't against the law to dress up as a clown"
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(How Stuff Works)
 
 
 
In today's episode of "Did You Know?", did you know there was an actual Jones family behind the phrase 'Keeping Up With the Joneses'? And, yep, they did seriously up the ante for ostentatious neighboring
source: now.howstuffworks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Finally a restaurant figures out that instead of hiring celebrity chefs they should employ real life grandmothers instead. "What's better than grandma's cooking?"
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
The Saturday Morning Book Club is feeling patriotic...patriotically funny, that is, and is looking for some great American humorists. Oh, and Mark Twain is a given, so who else you got?
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Overzealous CPS officials take children away from their mother for feeding her son nuts
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Hurricane Matthew continues his east coast tour, heads towards coastal Georgia and South Carolina today
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: aliens among us
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
Polish city unveils very cool solar glow-in-the-dark bicycle path. The sun is there
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Missoulian)
 
 
 
Old and busted: cat stuck in a tree. New and improved: cat stuck on a cliff face after attempting to go mountain climbing, resulting in a daring 300' rappelling rescue, just in time to arrive safely back on the ground for Caturday
source: missoulian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WREG Memphis)
 
 
 
If you want someone to read your resume, put it in a box of doughnuts
source: wreg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"Yes, the weather's fine up here. Thanks for asking"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
As if Florida currently didn't have enough problems, flesh-eating worms have returned
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Maclean's)
 
 
 
No, we didn't think to look for the 156-year old shipwreck in its namesake bay. Do you think we should?
source: macleans.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
I know philosophers have to put up with a lot of shiat from everyone else, but I didn't think it was this crappy
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Illinois steals woman's lottery winnings because her boyfriend used to deal drugs
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri October 07, 2016
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's Friday, so it's time for the Fark Weird News Quiz. With vitamins, minerals, and maybe a little dirt mixed in
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 19 Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Researchers from the Romero Institute find link between excessive selfie-taking and mental illness
source: fox19.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
American teachers are too stressed
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Where in the world are you going to fit another billion people in the world by 2030? Right here ..and here ..and here
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Today's plans: Breakfast, post office, hovering next to Wells Fargo ATMs in case tons of cash starts spewing out
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Drug Dealer: "Due to snitches, nobody comes in without being searched" Cops: "Hi Mind if we search your apartment?" Drug Dealer: "Umm... okay." Meth: "Helloooooo"
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(7 Deadly)
 
 
 
Two words: space burrito
source: 7deadlymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
In an attempt to track endangered orcas, scientist tag killer whale with number L95. Orca shows up five weeks later, dead of a fungal infection. From the dart used to track it
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Black architect humiliated when Seattle bank refuses to believe her paycheck is real
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Seizure-sensing rescue cat helps man become oldest living person with rare combination of brain diseases. Good kitty
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
The chicken was also reported to be intoxicated and armed with a pint glass
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Homey don't play that
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop these water droplets
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Federal agents arrest eight, including six soldiers, who were stealing military weapons and equipment from Fort Campbell and selling it to buyers around the world. The feds cracked this ring by using an investigative technique called "browsing eBay"
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lehigh Valley Live)
 
 
 
Cop arrested for pleasuring himself in public was also drafted in the 10th round of the MLB draft. Presumably by the Yankees
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Expert believes dogs can detect the passage of time with their noses by noticing changes in scent. Oh, so a watch dog
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Dundee schools on 'soft-lockdown' after social media threat. Threat did not involve a noife
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHAM Rochester)
 
 
 
WHAM
source: 13wham.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKBW Buffalo)
 
 
 
Chick heads, chick heads / Roly poly chick heads / Chick heads, chick heads / Eat them up, yum (Graphic image in article)
source: wkbw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Financial Express)
 
 
 
Actress chooses traditional Chinese medicine over chemo to treat her lymphoma. And it goes about as well as expected
source: financialexpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Homeland Security)
 
 
 
USIC confident that Russia hacked emails to influence US elections, as well as those of other countries. Later to confirm sky blue, beer good
source: dhs.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Dear Burglar, It's one thing to steal my jewelry and electronics. But when you kill my dog that's crossing the line
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(US News)
 
 
 
Tweeting becomes an acceptable way to serve a lawsuit, finally catching up with Facebook and LinkedIn messaging
source: usnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
Renegade otter family has been raiding commercial fishing pond for past six months, playing jug-band music to celebrate their daily fish feasts
source: news.asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this macho man
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Owensboro Messenger Inquirer)
 
 
 
Man brings a front loader to a crane fight with his brother
source: messenger-inquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
World's oldest cat turns 31 (equivalent to 141 in human years) and has the 1000-yard stare to prove it
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politicus USA)
 
 
 
Hurricane Matthew + Donald Trump + Twitter= total trainwreck
source: politicususa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston City Paper)
 
 
 
Some Charleston, SC businesses say they're suffering from premature evacuation
source: charlestoncitypaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
"The Waffle House Index" - an indicator that is actually unofficially used by FEMA
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chronicle of Higher Education)
 
 
 
Texas' new campus-carry law means that grad students no longer have to take time out of their drinking to hold office hours
source: chronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
People who ignored the hurricane evacuation warnings are now calling for help. Authorities are telling them that they have to stay put until things calm down. Or in other words, "You should have listened and evacuated, you dumb farks"
source: news.nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
North Carolina governor quietly diverts money from disaster relief to pay for legal challenges against the state's infamous anti-LGBT bathroom bill. At least there's not a hurricane bearing down on them or anything
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Heart in a box. Your move Timberlake
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Colombian President awarded Nobel Peace Prize a little premature. I mean, hell, Drew only got 12-year-old scotch for helping broker the peace between a South American government and the Politics Tab
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Trolling the fark out of Argentina on Twitter is apparently the Falkland Islands' new 4th favorite pastime. Sheep, beer, and having beer with sheep still #1-3
source: motherboard.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda Report)
 
 
 
Putin to receive 450 roses for his 64th birthday from first woman in space
source: pravdareport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Apparently the good people of Florida need to be reminded not to drink Hurricane Matthew's floodwaters
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fungi to be with
source: alejandrocastillo.deviantart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Heat Street)
 
 
 
Shameless: President Obama refuses to act as Hurricane Matthew heads straight for Trump's estate in Mar-A-Lago, just where he ordered the military to target it
source: heatst.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Hurricane Matthew discussion thread, Day 2. Stay safe, everyone, and check in when you can
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Two words you don't want associated with your swimming pool: snake orgy
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
"What a pissoir"
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Strip club plans a voter outreach program in hopes of getting everyone to the poles
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KWQC Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Middle school students visiting a farm exposed to tear gas from a prison exercise after a wind shift
source: kwqc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
With a wistful sigh, Ann Coulter calls Alicia Machado a "Hispanic mattress girl"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
What do you do when gauges have stretched your earlobes so thin you're afraid they'll tear?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Russia threatens to shoot down U.S. warplanes flying over Syria
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
If you want to live to 102, you better take up smoking soon
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Years-old, iconic road sign "Go to church or the Devil will catch you" rebuilt after act of God blew it down. Jesus, they never listen to Me
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Weather Underground)
 
 
 
Matthew up to Cat4, approaches U.S. coast at 16Mb/s
source: wunderground.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu October 06, 2016
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
Red light camera company vs. patent troll. Pick your evil then click the link to see who won
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Gators evacuating from Hurricane Matthew concentrate in lake to wait out cyclone. "I bet you could count 50. I have never seen that many"
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
What's the best way to find out if a garbage can is bear-proof? Give it to the biggest bear you can find and see what happens
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
80 percent of millennials have never eaten a Big Mac, as McDonald's "has gotten less relevant" to their dining choices
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
ISIS issues fatwa against indoor cat sex. Every decent American urged to grab strays in heat & set up feline Plato's Retreats in their living rooms
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The first campaign ads for Giant Meteor 2016 finally arrive
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
So, I dressed my elementary school students up as racial stereotypes, posted the photos to Instagram, and called them assholes. Was that wrong? Should I not have done that?
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFist)
 
 
 
On the East Coast all you have is nothing but pandemonium concerning the clown circus overtaking all metropolises, at least on the West Coast you have local psychologists
source: sfist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Hurricane Matthew discussion thread. Stay safe and don't leave the house
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Snorting heroin in a Walgreens washroom and collapsing on a sidewalk with your spouse? Just another day in Memphis, TN. Thankfully, some concerned bystanders were there to capture the human drama for YouTube
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsOK)
 
 
 
Oklahoma has declared October 13th a day of prayer ... for oil fields
source: newsok.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
You know, in times of distress and panic, its best to have a leader of your state reassure you that everythi- "This storm is going to kill you"....oh, well then. PANIC
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Engadget)
 
 
 
Scientists develop fur suit after extensive beaver research
source: engadget.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
You're a cashier at Wendy's. You forget to ask for a disabled teen's name to print on his ticket. Do you: A) Leave the field blank, B) Ask his mother, or C) Type in "Lil Ugly Dude," watch him cry, and giggle about it with your manager behind the counter?
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
This could be the greatest hurricane story ever written. Warning: if you're in the path of Matthew, it contains spoilers
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
Let us pause for a moment to thank the fine men and women of the Massachusetts State Police and National Guard who used a helicopter with thermal imaging and multiple vehicles and personnel in a raid that netted 1 pot plant from an 81 year old woman
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
 
 
Couple move out of Denver after witnessing flagrant hobosexual activity
source: denver.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Department of Defense investigates 3-star General's credit cards bills, many charges fell right in his lap
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Photoshop these rider watchers
source: yourshot.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Somehow an outhouse-turned-voting booth seems appropriate this election cycle
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Man whose Domino's pizza never arrived is awarded a refund by the court. Fark: $1,200
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Meet Little Timmy. Little Timmy is five years old. Little Timmy's mommy posted everything about him online. Now Little Timmy has three offshore bank accounts, 15 maxed-out credit cards, two pickup trucks, and 4 years of unpaid child support
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Herd of coin-operated department store ponies returned to their native grazing lands
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nassau Guardian)
 
 
 
Only one step left after this: kiss your ass goodbye
source: thenassauguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
We have reached peak Florida. And The Smoking Gun is there
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Behold, the 6th seal has been broken: a single page Cracked article
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
High school senior working on Photoshop certification superimposes clown behind tree with his school as backdrop, tweets it out to friends. Hilarity ensues
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Northwest Arkansas News)
 
 
 
Friendly deer named Doug captured by wildlife officers in Arkansas town, taken to "remote location"
source: nwaonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
Iraqi Minister explains the new airport location was chosen for its ideal weather conditions, which the aliens knew about when they built the world's first airport there 7000 years ago
source: rt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(University of Minnesota)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Garden 101 aftermath- You've got fresh produce picked or soon to be harvested.. Now what? Keeping it fresh to use right away or are you preserving some? Show us the goodies
source: extension.umn.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Influence)
 
 
 
Man goes to jail for life for dealing drugs to pay for his son's bone marrow transplant. Obama commutes his sentence, and he's freed. Two weeks later, he's in Christian "jail"
source: theinfluence.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Hurricane Matthew makes a 90 degree turn rather than have to decide which bathroom to use in North Carolina
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark Shop)
 
 
 
Fark Store Daily Deal: Wine essentials - corkscrew and pourer in a retro cylinder case that looks straight out of an old J. Peterman catalog or Joe vs. the Volcano movie. Quality / price? ehhh... *smokebomb* (Sponsored Link)
source: deals.fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Lots of court drama here over a collectible 1970s Speed Buggy lunchbox
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sign-holder
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KJRH Tulsa)
 
 
 
Dad gets arrested after stealing someone else's purse in the waiting room while he's visiting critically injured son in ICU. Both dad and son were victims of assault during a home invasion
source: kjrh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Here's a roundup of the most bizarre objects surgeons have found up people's asses (SFW)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
People staying behind to ride out Matthew reminded to write their social security number on at least one major body part with magic marker
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Looks like Putin really wants some attention and probably to be a bit taller
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTHR Indianapolis)
 
 
 
Gunfight at the BK Corral, featuring renowned firearms expert Wyatt Derp
source: wthr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Turns out there IS an upside to the massive increase in overdose deaths
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
Study: Marijuana use that begins early in life leads to abnormal brain function, compulsive posting on Fark
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Ancient Mayan codex found to be the oldest document from the Americas, just barely surpassing Larry King's birth certificate
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Professional clown performing group start "Clown lives matter" in hopes of quenching fear of the creepy bastards
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Indian Express)
 
 
 
"Hello, this is Joseph from the U.S. Tax Department, and I am calling because you are delinquent in your--hold on, someone is at the door"
source: indianexpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Russia says US diplomats were not Litvinenko-ed, they just Winehoused themselves
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Delhi TV)
 
 
 
Singapore aquarium didn't learn a lesson from Steve Irwin
source: ndtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Doesn't matter what we do, we'll never live past 125 years. So, you might as well stop exercising once you reach 100
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Norway's Prime Minister caught playing Pokemon Go during a session parliament. But what even happens in Norway anyway?
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Head Dildonian Ammon Bundy defends his aviary siege in court, saying it was a peaceful action to try and gather support for his imaginary cause
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Donald Trump sure has starred in a lot of softcore porn
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
With a month to go, Hillary Clinton stretches her lead to 10 points. Trump reacts by calling all American women fat and challenging Rosie O'Donnell to a duel
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"It was at that point my boyfriend got out the barbecue tongs to try and remove the vibrator from my bum" [Probably not safe for work]
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this interesting perspective
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Journal (Maine))
 
 
 
Scary clowns forget that Maine is the home of Pennywise and that Maine has dealt with this shiat before
source: sunjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KWQC Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Man sentenced to three years in prison for stealing U.S. corn secrets from Monsanto
source: kwqc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVB Boise)
 
 
 
Sorry folks, Florida is closed. Moose out front shoulda told ya
source: ktvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Do, commas, still, matter,? Subby, is, asking, for, a, friend
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Consumer Product Safety)
 
 
 
Looks like I picked the wrong week to start eating paint
source: cpsc.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Russian TV channel issues warning to citizens that nuclear war with the West could be imminent
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Tennessee mom is outraged that her child learns something. That's not what she expects from the Tennessee school system
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Brand Eating)
 
 
 
International divisions of Taco Bell offer seemingly tastier items like kimchi quesadilla, tikka masala burrito, and gordita with fries and tzatziki sauce. "Japan was represented by the Shrimp & Avocado Burrito"
source: brandeating.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Forget it, Jake. It's Fox News
source: theslot.jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Indian authorities capture pair of Pakistani spy pigeons before they could plot coo
source: blogs.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 596: "The Fungus Among Us". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed October 05, 2016
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Mall of America, normally the epitome of consumerism run amok, takes a stand by closing on Thanksgiving
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Fark-ready headline: Toilet paper addicted kangaroo returns to public restroom for another helping
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
British man solves 'world's smallest Rubik's cube' with a tweezers. Well, how else can you get those tiny little stickers off?
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Bees, trained by scientists who have never watched a thing on Syfy, can teach other bees new skills
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
If aliens do invade, they are not invading as tiny green spiders. C'mon man
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Looks like more than one governor was involved in the GW Bridge lane closures. Both sides are bad so please stay in your lane
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Darwin hangs ten with subway surfer on the F Train in NYC. Comes away with a good score, not so much for the subway surfer
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this dropping
source: phototass1.cdnvideo.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Study: Thanks to the Internet, Canadian millennials view themselves as global citizens and don't have as big of an emotional connection to Canada as older generations. Reporter: Canadian millennials don't have much love for Canada
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Florida Governor Rick Scott warns that Hurricane Matthew 'will be devastating'. Not as devastating as having Rick Scott as governor, but residents understood what he was getting at
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
NATO decides to show two Russian bombers all its fighter jets, one type at a time
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Times)
 
 
 
As god is my witness, some dumbass has never seen WKRP
source: arktimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Magazine)
 
 
 
Humanity has racked up $152 TRILLION of debt. Um...to whom? Itself? Aliens?
source: nymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patheos)
 
 
 
If you had 'Wednesday' as the day Christian extremists would blame Hurricane Matthew on 'the gays,' come forward to claim your prize
source: patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
Cash-conscious Saudi Arabia switches to the Gregorian calendar so they can pay their government workers less
source: rt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Europeans furious with Great Britain. No, not Brexit. Jamie Oliver added chorizo to paella
source: uk.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
It was just a matter of time before the authorities ruined the clown circus
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark Shop)
 
 
 
Fark Store Daily Deal: Pay-What-You-Want Macintosh software bundle. Meeting the minimum gets you Aurora HDR (old version), Duplicate Photos Fixer, Project Planning Pro, Nisus Writer Pro, Hit List list-maker, more. (Sponsored Link)
source: deals.fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
This refrigerator is top of the line: Speed chilling. Hot water dispenser. Porn. Five doors. (Probably Not safe for work)
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Leave Florida. The same advice you've received every other time you've told someone you live in Florida
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Sharp Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop the Official World Scout Knife
source: thisoldhouse.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
After realizing that inducing nightmares is not a good way to impress prospective students, St. Louis University has sent their new mascot back to the drawing board
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Tourist wanting a few hours of sleep may get a few years in prison for pulling plug on amplified religious service in Myanmar
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Father throws out 19-year-old son's Lego collection. Shoves, punches, handcuffs follow
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary, over the wording of a Fark headline. Okay, maybe it was really just over a cup of coffee, but THIS is your Fark Writer's Thread
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
You can take away my monkey, but you can never take away my freedom to buy more monkeys
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Here we go again: Another NSA contractor arrested in possible new theft of national secrets. We shall call him Edward J. Snowden 2.0
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Chinese President Xi says that he really likes being President, and thus, probably won't step down when his term is up
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Magazine)
 
 
 
Weld no longer feeling the Johnson
source: nymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
How a pickle incident led to globalization
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(El Paso Inc.)
 
 
 
Construction crews in Iceland are having problems. Do they blame a) bad weather b) bad equipment c) elves?
source: elpasoinc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
After wreaking havoc in Haiti, Hurricane Matthew puts on his skull face as he heads to the US for a little pre-Halloween disaster fun
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Having discovered the cure for all known diseases, scientists turn their attention to the regional accents of cod
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
If you work at the Grand Canyon, in a couple of weeks there will be no more rim jobs for the rest of the year
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
PETA sent a letter to the Arkansas State Highway and Transportation Department asking to build a 5-foot-tall tombstone memorial at the site of a truck crash that injured and killed several cows last month
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Rule number one of being an airline baggage handler: Don't get accidentally locked in the cargo hold just before the plane takes off
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Dildonian says Daddy Issues are the reason for the occupation
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this wheelie-popping motorcycling maniac
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
When you're a state trooper, sometimes it's hard to tell if a person died from natural causes or the result of a rogue moose attack
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deslidefied)
 
 
 
Here are 22 fascinating maps showing how Americans speak English differently, including how we can't agree on how to pronounce crayon
source: deslide.clusterfake.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
The mask's product description simply reads: 'I don't know what to say anymore.' (Definitely not safe for work)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Ever wonder if you could pass the driver's test in other countries? Hint - In Denmark you'd better seriously practice
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
It's been thirty years now so please, whoever stole the bodies of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow's parents, just put them back in their tombs and there will be no questions asked
source: portland.bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
New York environmental activist dubbed 'trash man' spends a whole month wearing every pound of garbage he consumes as clothing, and will keep at it until he is buried under his own mountain of garbage
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Cow struck and killed by milk truck. It's not Moos, it's Fark
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue October 04, 2016
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Sure you walked both ways uphill to get to school, but do you have leukemia and travel 400km alone to receive treatment and then hurry back for school?
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
The Weather Channel apologizes for employing an anchor who thinks Haitian children eat trees and that caused massive deforestation. We deeply regret the error
source: uproxx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
ISIS attacks Kurdish wedding after finally getting through the third season of Game of Thrones
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Well that was somethiLET ME HAVE MY 30 SECONDS! VP Debate wrapup thread
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Rosa Parks' old home dismantled and taken to Berlin by artist, hopefully not in the back of the plane
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
Dear Entergy Electric, Please put stronger locks at your electric utility substation. Thanks. Sincerely, 8,000 Arkansas customers currently in the dark
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
You sir, have insulted my honor. I challenge you a duel of weed whackers for me and an electric dryer for you
source: fox13news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Kaine, "I'M GOING TO TALK OVER YOU." Pence, "I'm smug as Fark." VP Debate thread part 2
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
The strange thing about being the leader of a caliphate is that you're just as prone to eat some bad hummus as anyone else
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WVVA Beckley)
 
 
 
Wolverine has a little brother who spends his time scaring children in West Virginia
source: wvva.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Will Mr. Rogers have a beautiful night on the debate stage? Will Mike Pence go Trump on a kind man? Will we finally have a new version of the Biden/Palin debate meme? THIS is your VP debate thread (9pm on CBS)
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Town rallies and finds toddler lost in cornfield. It was no big deal because every few months, they lose a toddler in the cornfield. That movie Children of the Corn was made for a reason
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Man covers his 2000 Chevrolet Blazer with 51,300 pennies, doubling its value
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
So sure are the RNC of Mike Pence's debate victory tonight, they've already declared him the winner
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
"I had to pay $39.35 to hold my baby after he was born"
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Love that new computer smell? Now you can have it every day in candle form. Difficulty: must like Macs
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this happy dancer
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
'Clown panic' largely fueled by unverified reports, but hey it is still fun, right?
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Sign outside church in North Wales: 'Forgiveness is swallowing when you want to spit'. Vicar claims ignorance
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Women, after breastfeeding, your breasts turn cannibalistic. Just so you know (possibly not safe for work)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
For those considering moving to Canada if your favorite sociopath does not win in November, here's how you get citizenship
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Pennsylvania gets out in front of recent spate of clown scares with a 'clown threat bulletin'. Threat levels range from white face paint to red noses. Yellow-stained balloon trousers mysteriously missing
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
2016 strikes yet again: Jane Fonda's co-star dies
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hamilton Spectator)
 
 
 
Holy fark Ray, look We got ourselves our own whisky
source: thespec.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this wall clock
source: c2.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Extra Crispy)
 
 
 
Food writer says Virginia Bagels 'are the best in the world'. New Yorkers: Wait you're serious, let us laugh even harder
source: extracrispy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly Voice)
 
 
 
Philadelphia man plays Mario Cart on I-76
source: phillyvoice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Your boyfriend was hit by a car and has just died. Do you A) collapse in grief and shock, B) try to gather your thoughts, or C) steal the attending medic's wallet
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Jeremy Clarkson's ancestors were sued for environmental pollution in 1871, because of course it's genetic
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The top 4 things CNN has gotten from BuzzFeed
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark Shop)
 
 
 
Fark Store Daily Deal: Piper Computer Kit. Zamfir, rats, or the big sister in Charmed? (Sponsored Link)
source: deals.fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
School teaches teen valuable hot cocoa sampler box life lesson
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
You may be shocked to learn that Alabama is not racially harmonious
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Ruin a date in five words
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTHR Indianapolis)
 
 
 
Traffic is moving well except for the east side which is blocked by 29,000 pounds of spilled cookie dough
source: wthr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Woman makes rabbits out of dust bunnies. You know what they say -- if you have lemmings, make lemonade
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Well Facebook's new Marketplace App is off to a predictable start with people selling drugs, weapons, and "Adult Services"
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NOAA)
 
 
 
In five days Tropical Storm Nicole will get hitched with Hurricane Matthew before honeymooning in North Carolina
source: nhc.noaa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Chuck E. Cheese: Where a kid can be a kid ... and adults can be flaming a-holes
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Turns out the big Wikileaks October Surprise was nothing but an opportunity to hawk their books at 40% off. Trump fans angry, thought Death Star was fully operational
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sputnik News)
 
 
 
Congress: "Let's pass a law so people can sue countries because terrorism." Obama: "Bad idea. People can sue us too." Congress: "law." Obama: "veto." Congress: "override, uh, derp, uh, it's Obama's fault. What branch are we?" Iraqis: "lawsuit"
source: sputniknews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Weather Channel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this aerial goat
source: dsx.weather.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"What I learned trying to live my life as a badger." What the hell, seriously?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Good news for fans of spicy loose meat sandwiches: Today is National Taco Day. Article contains some Southern Cali locations with specials. Now, go find some taco deals in your town
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
The bad news if a 7.0 earthquake hits Los Angeles in the next day or two is that the region would be catastrophically impacted. The good news is it would mean scientists are finally able to predict earthquakes
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Hiding your drugs in your vagina during a traffic stop. New Floridaness: Hiding your ID in your vagina during a traffic stop
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Six-year-old boy shot in S.C. school will be buried as Batman: "Pallbearers will dress as superheroes and people attending also are encouraged to wear costumes"
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Climate change is now being blamed for **spins wheel** the increase of air turbulence
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon October 03, 2016
(Vice)
 
 
 
Not only do the ultra-rich have better weed than you, they have better paraphernalia than you, too. I'll let you get back to poking pinholes on your half-crushed Colt 45 can
source: motherboard.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Teen tries to hire a clown to kill her teacher. Homey don't play that
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Why drug addicts require a minimum of 28 days to get through rehab. Or not: "As far as I know, there's nothing magical about 28 days"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCTV5 Kansas City)
 
 
 
If you sell alcohol near a homeless shelter, get ready to move
source: kctv5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Tennis Match: Hot air balloon edition
source: walldevil.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: JuggalOHMYGOD GET IN THE CAR!
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wide Open Spaces)
 
 
 
Rare albino bull moose caught on camera in Alaska. Fark: and they didn't blow it away
source: wideopenspaces.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rocketnews 24)
 
 
 
In today's "Weird or cool from Japan": Pay your Furusato tax and get a ninja sword as a thank you
source: en.rocketnews24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tacoma News Tribune)
 
 
 
More creepy clowns sighted in Pierce County, Washington. It's a nationwide coulrodemic
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
91-year-old woman who skipped cancer treatment to travel across the country dies after year-long adventure not spent in a cancer ward
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
As if Hello Kitty AK-47s and "personal massagers" weren't enough, here's Hello Kitty Wine
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Bootstrappy Alaskans livid over reduction in socialism
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this beachgoer
source: foma.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Not news: horse gets loose and runs around in town. Fark: Where 'town' = 'Detroit'
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
NewsFlash
 
Scam charity ordered to stop fundraising immediately by New York AG
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Death by anti-aircraft fire is a risk for all fighter pilots, whether it's during a vital mission for your country or screwing up the landing at a Best Korean air show
source: foxtrotalpha.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
And today's plane caught in a crosswind and forced to miss its landing comes to you from Birmingham International Airport (UK)
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
SCOTUS to hear cases involving insider trading, death penalty, taxpayer funds helping religious schools, false arrests. Why not just call ties now, be done with it?
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Connecticut congressman says proposal for $10 billion tunnel under Hartford is "not remotely close to what the Big Dig was." For you younger readers, the Big Dig was a "$2.8 billion" project
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Donald Trump to military veterans: Only weak losers come home from war with PTSD
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Man survives being attacked twice by the same bear after "doing everything he was supposed to do". Well, except for not traipsing around the bear's home
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washingtonian)
 
 
 
Attn: Humans: You'll still be necessary after DC's new food-delivery robots roll out--they need your help pressing the walk-signal button
source: washingtonian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Reciprocal lutefisk consumption, man seeing porn at McDonald's can't get the Grimace off his face, and people who read Playboy for the articles of clothing: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 9/25 - 10/1
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(24/7 Wall Street)
 
 
 
The most dangerous cities in America ranked
source: 247wallst.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Indy Channel)
 
 
 
Running late for work? Time to break out that "chased by a clown" excuse
source: theindychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"Points are deducted if gravel or asphalt is found in food." Welcome to West Virginia's roadkill cook off
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
World's largest dinosaur footprint discovered in Gobi Desert, proving once again that it was difficult for them to find custom made shoes
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this affectionate family portrait
source: photar.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
The world's deepest underwater cave is so deep, researchers have been looking since 1999 and still can't find the bottom. It's like a 'yo mamma' joke but with more science
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Apparently train data recorders are about as reliable as police body cams
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
NY county executive proposes $105 "public service fee" to be tacked on to all traffic and parking tickets, to go on top of the standard $60 "go fark yourself" fee and the $185 "lotsa luck proving we ticketed you for driving while black" surcharge
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
That's no moon
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Farc peace deal rejected, Colombians subject to a month in the politics tab
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
In the old days of terrible college roommates, you could just eat your feelings. Now, you can live-tweet them to the masses
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
61% of Coloradans are happy with pot legalization. "They said it would hurt the economy, but the economy is booming. They said it would hurt tourism, but we have more visitors spending more money than ever"
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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