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Sun March 06, 2016
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
Reactor at Oconee Nuclear Station in South Carolina shut down after explosion, fire, "unusual event." PANIC?
source: rt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Hottest new genre is 'cli-fi', fiction about the effect of global warming. Notable books include Barbara Kingsolver's "Flight Behavior," Nathaniel Rich's "Odds Against Tomorrow," and anything by the UN's Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these artfully lit pieces of chocolate
source: joinfo.ua   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fortune)
 
 
 
Inventor of email and savior of the @ sign, Ray Tomlinson, is dead @ 74
source: fortune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
A møøse once wrecked my sister's car
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
California's about to ski its way out of a drought. Thanks, El Niño
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Rollo's origins questioned. Mike, Ike, Mr. Goodbar, and the Three Musketeers all deny paternity. Skor smiles almost imperceptibly, recalling that long-ago night in Denmark. Or was it Norway?
source: thelocal.dk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
How it feels to be a virgin in your 30s and 40s: Farkers share their stories
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
"Dang, cop pulling me over. And me with a suspended license." *sigh* "Well, only one option now"
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
"Hi. Is your name Jason? Do you remember hooking up with a drunk chick named Diana in a port-o-potty at the New York K-Rock concert in '96? If so, I would like to meet you, Dad"
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fitness instructor
source: fithacker.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Going to hike in the Rachel Carson challenge in the summer. 35 miles in one day. Any training suggestions?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Honestly the only thing you will need to bring on your own to the world's most expensive hotel is your miniature giraffe. Opulent is an understatement
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Stop using so gotdamn many exclamation points!!!
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
NewsFlash
 
Heaven is about to get some new china
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
So, let's check with the California homeless man who was passing out resumes to passersby instead of asking for money
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Britons suffering extreme deprivation after two recent storms that flooded a major factory has resulted in a nationwide shortage of biscuits for their tea
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Iranian president has three wealthy businessmen sentenced to death for financial corruption. Your move, Bernie Sanders
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
If you take an elevator out of service for maintenance, it's probably a good idea to check inside. Probably
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
If you're going to ride an unregistered motorcycle, try not to crash into a police car. If you absolutely must crash into the police car, put your beer down first
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Jared Fogle is power eating his way back to his former physique
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
On the other hand, Canadian six-year-olds have been known to be pretty terrifying
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 4 San Antonio)
 
 
 
Former Army sergeant working at a CVS pharmacy given a raise and a plaque after taking down two thieves. Just kidding, they fired him
source: news4sanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
World War II vet and Pearl Harbor survivor finally receives his medals, 75 years after the day that lives in infamy
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Central Maine)
 
 
 
To prevent sign thefts, town considers renaming Katie Crotch Road, taking all the fun out of drivers being warned that it's slippery when wet
source: centralmaine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this slow invasion
source: images.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: What's in a name
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Scooby-Doo busted for DUI. Shaggy unavailable for comment
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Taking initiative to save a little girl's life? Of course that's a suspension, you regulation-breacher
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Tired of waiting for the justice system to put Martin "Pharma Bro" Shkreli on trial, a coven of witches has put a hex on the corrupt businessman
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sacred Artichoke)
 
 
 
Our host is spending time with his family so he won't be in the studio tonight. Instead here is an archived Livingston Stapler Company Presents show from March 30, 2013 for your listening pleasure
source: sacredartichoke.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 05, 2016
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this deco-decorated living space
source: media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lowell Sun)
 
 
 
Man hires hit man to take out his wife, but he turns out to be an undercover cop, so he hires a second hit man to take out the first, and you can guess how that worked out
source: lowellsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: A new G.I. Joe character
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"What do you fill your gas tank with?" "I fill it with 100% pure Brazilian man. Very efficient and is environmentally friendly, too"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Who hasn't broken into a Sikh Temple, decided it was an ISIS lair, stripped naked, and torn it apart with a sword? "Intoxication/impairment are possible factors"
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Plymouth Herald)
 
 
 
"Competitors from around the country and as far afield as Canada today descended on the Eden Project for the fifth annual World Pasty Championships, the greatest celebration of Cornwall's culinary gift to the world"
source: plymouthherald.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Phoenix church engages in UFIA. As part of the worship. Checkmate, Father Murphy
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
It's the the tallest rope swing in the world. Too bad about your crippling fear of heights, huh?
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Senior citizen and teen steal fire truck, play bumper cars in street in what is sure to be an upcoming Hallmark Movie Of The Week plot (pics)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Psychologists are starting to diagnose "Trump anxiety" in their patients, which totally shouldn't confirm any previously held beliefs you may have had about psychology being bullshiat
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
My alarm clock that syncs to the atomic clock is 7 minutes fast, and now says it's 2025. Is it safe to assume I overslept by 9 years and 7 minutes?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Why does Google Earth show a plane at the bottom of Lake Harriet? And why is CNN not covering this 24/7?
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
Woman bites off boyfriend's eyebrow. Bert seeks order of protection
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when you're trying to cross the Bering Strait using skis and kayaks only to discover that the ice is too thin to ski on, but it's also too thick to kayak through? Yeah, me too
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Freshman college students are dumber than ever: "You get this piece of paper with all these numbers, so how does this work?"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
Drug lord "El Chapo" says he's having trouble sleeping in a Mexican prison. Which raises the question: Who actually does sleep well when they're imprisoned in Mexico?
source: news.nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
How's your national day of unplugging going? If you're commenting on this we already know your answer
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this arm chair
source: metrouk2.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
This Florida Dad has guaranteed he is getting cheap socks for Fathers day for the rest of his life
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Why you old hound dog of a professor, you've been a porn star all these years? (Somewhat not safe for work)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Meet Gimo, the big-eyed cat that's taking the internet and Caturday by storm
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
I need to read something good and entertaining and unputdownable, what should it be?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Justia)
 
 
 
Tennessee wins Most Awesome Law Name On The Books award
source: law.justia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 04, 2016
(Fark)
 
 
 
Welcome back to the Friday Fark Weird News Quiz, no booger edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Police seek robbery suspect described as "handsome," "cute," "well dressed" and "European," wonder if he's single
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
The last American veteran of the Spanish Civil War has died at 100. He fought Fascists before it was cool
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Scientist)
 
 
 
Lake? Whoah, be gone
source: newscientist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this high-level handoff
source: knm.nl   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Burglars in monkey masks break into marijuana dispensary. Officials say the situation is evolving
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
One in six UK flight attendants claim they have had sex with a passenger on board. Could you be next? Short answer: No
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Residents complain their drinking water contaminated with lead. And arsenic. And dioxins. And furans. What the heck is a furan? They're just making this stuff up nowadays
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Channel News Asia)
 
 
 
Kazakh airline fires pilot found flying too high
source: channelnewsasia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Panama City News Herald)
 
 
 
Man stretching his back on balcony railing falls 11 stories, lands in shallow pool. TA-DAH
source: newsherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
'Dragons' to soon rise from the center of the Earth if all goes well in a cave located in Slovenia. SOON
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Wrong-way driver sentenced to life in mental hospital; that'll teach him
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
And today's "street beggar who finishes his shift and then climbs into his $70,000 Audi" story comes to you from the UK
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
The Colorado theater shooter was secretly transferred to another prison because it turns out other inmates didn't much care for him. My violin is so small I seem to have lost it
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
If your dying wish was to have your cremated remains mailed to your sister, the US Postal service hopes you'll accept the consolation prize of having them spread across multiple post offices in Michigan
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Dog causes SUV to crash into pet salon. Your dog wants a steak and a nice makeover, with maybe a nice little flirty bow on her collar
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Conspiracy theory No.525,824 concerning the Malaysia Airlines Flight MH370 disappearance: All these plane parts that are showing up in different places are being planted by aliens
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
And the eighth and final rule: If this is your first day at Baby Fight Club, you have to fight
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Oh, you mean THOSE Taliban leaders. Yeah, they're here
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Michigan state environmental agency, who failed to notice the lead from Flint's old pipes was seeping into the drinking water, act quickly to block those old pipes' replacement
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Women sue to stop New York tampon tax. And yet no one sued to stop the prevalence of New York douchebags
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cone applicator
source: 3.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Some muenster dumped 14 tonnes of cheese beside a highway. Locals camembert it any more, police are on the queso
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Why are we still talking about Trump and Cruz and Rubio when there are time-traveling lawyers still in the presidential race?
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Upcoming delayed Benin election has 33 presidential candidates, Beninese point out at least none of them are Trump
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Scuba diver 0, nuke plant 1: "He got sucked in like a wet noodle. He just, poof, gone"
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
ISIS officially endorses Donald Trump for president
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
If you're going to look at child porn on your cell phone, you might want to remember to grab it before leaving Starbucks. Bonus "This guy seems harmless" mugshot
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Nearly one-third of the American families on food stamps still need to visit food pantries each month to properly garnish their steak and lobster
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
San Bernardino DA claims the locked iPhone may contain a "cyber pathogen," as well as probably being responsible for JFK assassination, the 9/11 controlled detonation, maybe also a morphed T-1000 specimen
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Myrtle Beach Online)
 
 
 
"I need a beer," abandoned 3-year-old tells police before her mother is arrested
source: myrtlebeachonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(24/7 Wall Street)
 
 
 
Average price of gas nationwide: $1.75. In San Francisco? Over $5
source: 247wallst.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
"He heard a click, turned round, and realized there was a padlock on his ear"
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Red and Black)
 
 
 
Early morning, meth and Waffle House...boring. Dressed as a clown? Now we have a story
source: redandblack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
New U.S. commander named to take over the Afghanistan war. Which in the sports world would be the equivalent to being named head coach of the Cleveland Browns
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Not news: Waves from jerks in speed boat hot dogging in the bay damage your fish farm and boat. News: Jerks in question are from the Aussie navy--in a 3,810 tonne frigate
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCVB Boston)
 
 
 
Forget ISIS, border walls, the stagnant job market and the decline of civil discourse. THIS is the most important crisis on Earth
source: wcvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Suspect flees police on hoverboard. Heavy
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cryptozoology News)
 
 
 
Shapeshifting reptilian humanoids have infiltrated the judicial system
source: cryptozoologynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
When you drink jug wine you walk into doors. When you walk into doors, you get a ride to the hospital. When you ride to the hospital drunk, you grope the EMT. When you grope the EMT, they book you. Released, you steal a cop car. Don't drink jug wine
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
Russian man faces a year in prison for denying the existence of God online. In other news, God uses AOL
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Tourists arrested for exposing too Macchu of their Picchus
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Years ago, a construction worker found a knife buried at OJ Simpson's estate. He gave it to an off-duty officer, who kept it in a baggie. The retired cop called a friend to get the case number of the murders, and now the knife is being tested for DNA
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
A fisherman's foot was impaled after an aggressive sea lion snatched most of a large halibut away from him. No mad-libs were harmed in the making of this headline
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
It never takes the police long to catch a doughnut thief
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Trends)
 
 
 
In new record for selfie casualties, five tourists simultaneously tumble off a cliff
source: digitaltrends.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this train window
source: c2.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 19 Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Guy claims that being a wrestler gave him herpes. Surprisingly, this story doesn't involve Chyna, Sunny, or Missy Hyatt
source: fox19.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
For once, someone in the hospital actually DID have a tracking chip implanted
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Nice nuclear power plant you got there. Be a shame if some bird... shiat on it
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dx.com)
 
 
 
Honey, I bought our kid a toy gun. The ad said it was a good parent-child toy, it has more times shooting mode, and can play sex, whatever that means
source: dx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Canada's new Prime Minister Justin Trudeau admittedly doesn't read newspapers or watch the news on television but he thinks Americans need to pay more attention to the world
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
What really happens when a transgender person uses a locker room? I dunno... they get dressed?
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
20,000 ISIS uniforms intercepted before delivery. Terrorists have uniforms?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LAist)
 
 
 
Old and Busted: Whole Foods Asparagus Water. New Hotness: Whole Foods Peeled Sumo Mandarins in plastic containers
source: laist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Why don't we just shoot all our garbage into the Sun?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Britain's alt scene finally outlawed
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
Couple invents spiked armor for dogs to protect them from wile e coyotes
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Your dog is on the fence about this one
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 03, 2016
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Interactive London skyline 1616-2016. London bridge is in the same place but lacks the houses, shops and severed heads of traitors
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Why wait in line at the DMV when you can make your own license plate out of cardboard?
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Sorry, folks, the hotel's full. The velociraptor at the front desk shoulda told ya
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 19 Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Today's the day the teddy bears ARE the picnic
source: fox19.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Gov Snyder: Well, the good thing about the Flint water crisis is that it allowed us to create 81 new jobs distributing bottled water. No, really. That's a thing he said
source: politicscentral.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Sheepdog gives birth to litter of 17 puppies. She must have been crossbred with a clown-car
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Guatemala's volcano is en Fuego
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Man arrested for trying to screw with his partner's head
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this classic battleship
source: picshare.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
One way to quickly forget your ex? Burn your love letters. And the local playground
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Because when you want to play with your fireworks, you want to light them off in the middle of the Beijing Airport so as to NOT cause a disturbance
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
If you're reading this, you're probably not in Syria right now
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MyRecipes)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Yes yes, all the booze. Now, with that out of the way, what food do you make to celebrate St Patrick's Day? It's coming up quick so share your recipes to the right
source: myrecipes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popsugar (UK))
 
 
 
How to decorate your fingernails with tiny perfect emojis, because you're an idiot with the fashion sense of an eight-year-old girl
source: popsugar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Bethesda, MD man throws party that ends with 110 police citations
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOAT Albuquerque)
 
 
 
Dealing meth out of a port-a-potty in the parking lot of an adult video store? Your business model needs work
source: koat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Hyperpatriotic American imagery from an alternate universe where the Turkey won out over the Bald Eagle to be our national bird
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Peregrine falcons are dicks
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Express & Star)
 
 
 
If you try to frame an innocent man for a murder you committed, you're evil. If you try to do the same except with a speeding ticket, you're just stupid
source: expressandstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
In latest sign that the apocalypse is all but upon us, Germans are drinking less
source: mintel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
When that magnitude-7.8 earthquake hit Indonesia on Wednesday, every single tsunami warning buoy in the region failed
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
A child falls from a window every three weeks in Austria. Seriously, someone needs to close that damn window
source: thelocal.at   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
An examination of whether it's time to do away with the personal check. But...but...but how else will I hold up the checkout line at the supermarket?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ben Cur
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Firefighters' firefight
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Former Playboy model jailed after failed hit on mafia boss. Wait, isn't this a movie plot?
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
One moment you're picking up pizza, the next moment you are pizza
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Salford City Council in the North of England try to ban swearing in public. Good luck with that you c**ts
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Too much happiness can kill you just as dead as too much sadness
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vineland Daily Journal)
 
 
 
Fake police trooper calls dispatch after the stripper he tried to pull over flees, tells the police that he's an off-grid trooper and was armed with "hands and feet that are registered"
source: thedailyjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 61 Connecticut)
 
 
 
Not an Onion headline: Philly hospital teaches residents in violent areas gunshot wound first aid
source: fox61.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
Russian church gets away with a $11,500 debt by promising to pray for the good health of the creditors. Amen
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kent Online)
 
 
 
Mumsnet wants you to sign a petition banning a mannequin from a watch shop window. Seems pretty silly - how bad can it... I'll be in my bunk
source: kentonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kelowna Now)
 
 
 
Vancouver police arrest 20-year old woman who attacked pedestrians, kicked an elderly woman, and tried to push someone else off a pier. Vicky Mendoza diagonal in play
source: kelownanow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Hey cosplay teacher dude, did you really think your students wouldn't find out?
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Sorry, but you may no longer use ducks as a weapon in Spain
source: thelocal.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this ball handler
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
You think healthcare in the US is crazy expensive and out of control, in China they're cracking down on scalpers reselling hospital tickets to desperate patients who just want treatment
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Man taking selfies with gun fatally shoots himself. This is why you should take selfies with a camera
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
A man exploring his great-grandfather's house discovers a crumpled paper bag that contains seven near-mint baseball cards dating between 1909-1911. Rick from Pawn Stars promptly offers $50 for them
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Daylight savings time linked to increased risk of strokes, especially in the fall when you get that stolen hour back and use it for a few more strokes
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Who is responsible for death threats from a Twitter bot?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Herald Scotland)
 
 
 
Hospital announces operations are cancelled "because there is brown stuff running down the walls." You should have seen patients' faeces when they were told
source: heraldscotland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
We can play if we want to, we can stick it up our nose, cause your mom won't watch and if she don't watch, well she's no mom of yours - ss-aa-ff-ee-tt-yy safety pin, it's the safety pin
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
If you're a single mom on a budget, sometimes it only makes sense to let others think you're a lesbian if it saves you $5 on admission into a park. "It's not like we are the lesbian version of Rachel Dolezal"
source: callahan.bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Twenty-five years after a shocking beating galvanized a nation, the baton no longer leads the charge
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Officer hits woman's car, stops to talk, threatens to kill her, and is killed by another car
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
The judge just did you a huge favor, believing you were remorseful and sparing you three years in jail. It's not a good idea to go on Facebook and tell her to suck it
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
War, murder, rape, pillage, extortion are not enough for Islamic State as it takes it down another notch with its move into international banking
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
If your office is too noisy to concentrate I'm sure your boss would have no problem if you put a giant riot-shaped helmet over your head to block out distractions and let you focus on the task at hand
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Okay, Farkers, the age old question: Could two people repopulate the Earth? Here comes the science
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KeysNet)
 
 
 
"Unsatisfied" strip-club customer threatens citizen arrest of stripper who wouldn't do the dirty. He's also a disbarred lawyer
source: keysnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tucson News Now)
 
 
 
Thieves have killed four people trying to steal weaves and products. Who is to blame? A) the thieves, B) the thieves, C) the thieves, or Z) demonic spirits?
source: tucsonnewsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Yes it's time for the tiny violins again: Now that she's studying abroad again this little princess misses her lifestyle because of what she's been accustomed to. Yes, billionaire problems
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
North Korea launches a devastating attack against their oldest foe
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Women are paying $1,700 for bone broth cleanse where they consume nothing but the liquid beloved by Paleo devotees for 5 days. Sounds like a load of bouillon
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Manhattan District Attorney says you will no longer go to jail for publicly drinking and peeing in his borough. I ♥ NY
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 565: "Boats 2" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 02, 2016
(Metro)
 
 
 
Mother bills her son over $39,000 after supporting him for a year, tacks on $1,000 asshole surcharge
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Anders Brevik, killer of 77 Norwegians, mostly teenagers, is complaining that his three cells, TV, computer, and PlayStation aren't enough for him, and he's being unfairly treated by having his correspondence from prison monitored
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Apparently, exploding teeth is a thing
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Fake teen "doctor" arrested again for "transplanting" $34,000 from elderly woman's account into his "car fund"
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Delmarva Now)
 
 
 
Federal judge settles Cracker Barrel's lawsuit against competitors 'New Jersey-style' knock-off. Who wants to dine at "55-Gallon Drum Fulla Dead Mobsters"?
source: delmarvanow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this intrepid catwalk explorer
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Venezuela: SNAFU
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
March 2, 2016 at BWW in Cary, NC - Drew is headed back to Cary. Come hang out
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Not news: Woman dies after falling. Fark: By being strangled by her medical alert necklace
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Ever wanted to make jewelry out of breast milk? You're not alone
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
A male high school student "grabs" and distributes a female teacher's nude pics from her phone. Only one of them faces disciplinary actions. Which one?
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Trump has been nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize and words no longer have meaning, so have a spaceship waffle Wednesday
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
New 'female Viagra' pill gets mixed reviews. Women find it works much better when they take it with alcohol
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Improve an already classic painting of your choice
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yakima Herald Republic)
 
 
 
Teens accused of burning down their principal's house in retaliation for suspension, stealing stapler, not allowing them to listen to the radio quietly between 9 am 11 while collating
source: yakimaherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Malaysian Airlines now appears to offer one stop service to Mozambique. Well for parts of the plane, anyway
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Civilized)
 
 
 
D.A.R.E says they've never had a list of gateway drugs, which is truthier now that they've deleted the list of gateway drugs from their website
source: civilized.life   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Oh, sure, we all goof around at work on the company equipment. But then, we don't work with car crash testing equipment
source: thelocal.at   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Women prisoners to be transferred to men's prison due to overcrowding. I have only one question: How is Pam Grier involved in this?
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
CNN reports Australia is building a fence on the border of Slovenia, or something
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week UK)
 
 
 
Islamic State 'spreading through refugees like cancer' says the ironically named NATO Chief Philip Breedlove
source: theweek.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The first rule of Sheriff's Jailed Prisoner Fight Club is...wait, prisoner fight club?
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Canada finally begins phasing In government-mandated à la carte cable
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRIC Richmond)
 
 
 
A teacher's open letter challenging parents and society as a whole to "Love your kids the way I do." And for once, its not sexually
source: wric.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
"Oh crap, we lost the grandmother's body. What do we do?" "How about we replace it with another woman and just dress it in the same clothes? They'll never notice" "BRILLIANT"
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Oooooh. Tough choice: free ice cream or stare at a small screen like Pavlov's dog
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
For an update on just how effective reforms at the USPTO have been, US patent 8,738,435 claims a computer-generated form letter
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
March has begun, another day rung and you're wondering "where do we go from here?" Well we've got good news, that's probably due. Subby can't rhyme worth his salt. THIS is your Fark Writer's Thread "so close, yet so far" edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Those sailors captured by Iran? McHale's Navy right there
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
What really goes on at an Australian maximum security prison? Sex. Lots and lots of sex. "There's more action in prison than an after-party at the Mardi Gras"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Cop saw flying turd ball first-hand in Toronto neighbour row. I love how Canadian headlines mix up English and American slang
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier-Journal)
 
 
 
KFC Manager fires employee because she is transgender, KFC Corporate responds by firing the manager because he's a bigot
source: courier-journal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
College students are turning to sugar daddies to help pay their tuition
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Planning on leaving the country if "The Donald" becomes President? The NY Daily News has you covered with their complete guide on how to flee the country. Tag is for the odds you'll actually leave
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Tennessee teenager successfully stands his ground against family members who wantonly threatened to send him to school
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
NewsFlash
 
Massive 8.1 magnitude quake near Sumatra has Indonesia on a little wet edge. LIKE A TSUNAMI alert across the Indian Ocean
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this levitating beauty
source: hi-news.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
You can relax, lawmakers of Arkansas. It's still legal to wear sweatpants in the Capitol
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LawFuel)
 
 
 
Today is [Facebook friend's] birthday. Reply to post a wish on her Timeline or reply with 1 to post 'Happy Birthday' or file a class action lawsuit for sending users unsolicited automated text messages
source: lawfuel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Here's how governments invented data encryption, then lost control of it
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Bundy militia set off Malheur National Wildlife Refuge workers' spidey senses weeks before occupation
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
In tonight's weather report we see lows around 50° in the higher elevations with the valley reporting in at a balmy 52°
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
Portland's newest bridge is open, and it has a dedicated bike lane...which is about 4" narrower than a pickup truck (link fixed)
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
Marriott introduces a new chain of hotels called 'Moxy' that are marketed to millennials and come with rock-themed conference rooms, arcade games, and vinyl record players
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Finally, a reason to use Snapchat. Let's create some nightmares, shall we?
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Marcia Clark blames Christopher Darden for the OJ glove snafu
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Ice cream-stuffed doughnut cones are surprisingly NOT an American invention
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Today in You're Doing it Wrong: Coffee filters
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 01, 2016
(Irish Mirror)
 
 
 
Scientists warn that alien DNA raining down on Earth could mix with Zika virus to create super disease. Here comes the panspermia
source: irishmirror.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Cursing found to be good for your health. Still no cure for f*cking cancer
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man sought for credit card abuse tries to flee in pink Power Wheels electric car
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
The bishop created a "payout chart" guide. Victims fondled over their clothes paid $10,000 to $25,000; fondled under their clothes or subjected to masturbation, $15,000 to $40,000
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vancouver Sun)
 
 
 
Canadian employer hasn't hired a smoker in 30 years: "People say 'You can't do that, it's discrimination. I say. 'Look, I've been doing it for 30 years and I'm proud of it. I'm trying to help people'"
source: vancouversun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
Could you down five drinks for lunch and go back to work? Apparently these NYC construction workers can
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Scientist)
 
 
 
New British law requires every Brit's web browsing history to be stored for 12 months in case the cops or the government or the Queen or somebody wants to look at it
source: newscientist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
New bulletproof furniture available in either duck down or hide
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop these dolls
source: c2.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
No need to check into Facebook when you get to the bar, your Lyft driver will helpfully post your location to his feed for you
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
French police bring migrants to their sha-na-na-na-knees-knees
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
And you all laughed when Indiana Jones used a fridge to save himself. Who's laughing now ?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Murder case collapses in Omagh bomb trial. Thanks, Omagh bomber
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Its not German racism that makes refugees return home. It's the impenetrable German bureaucracy
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSB Radio)
 
 
 
Biologists predict 95 percent decline in Georgia bats. In their defense, the Braves can't really get much worse
source: wsbradio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Today's 'Deputy's dash cam captures video of drunk passenger falling head first into creek' story brought to you by Tennessee
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 26 Milwaukee)
 
 
 
Oshkosh police arrest man for sending inappropriate pictures to a minor. B'gosh
source: nbc26.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Lion, and Tiger, and bear...d'awwwww, sorry, I mean, "oh my"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Getting braces is always a tough part of growing up; they feel funny, and all of the other dogs laugh at you
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
The Supreme Court goes dark during oral
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Not satisfied with their haul at the Oscars, the Girl Scouts set their sights on a more consistent revenue stream
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this underwater denizen
source: c2.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Guy was concerned that his wife had a tracking device in her tooth and it's the government's fault. What a paranoid wacko
source: national.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Go deep inside a sex doll... factory (not safe for work)
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Stolen taco truck fleeing police hits school bus in a tasty violation of school lunch policy on sandwich delivery
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lex 18)
 
 
 
There's "horny," there's "extremely horny," and there's "can't even get out of the parking lot of a Hardee's during rush hour before banging next to the drive-thru line"
source: lex18.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Serious Eats)
 
 
 
Frying and searing with olive oil: good idea or a no-no? Here comes the science
source: seriouseats.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
A zombie who killed his roommate ate his braaaaains is up for paaaarole
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Indian man becomes a cricket star after losing both arms in an accident at a sawmill that made cricket bats
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Stray dogs given new lease of life as they are trained to be ball dogs in the Brazil open, but "just need to work on dropping the ball a bit quicker"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Louisiana sheriff's captain on mission from god which includes hunting "animals" and "heathens" but doesn't include following police rules or being a sheriff's captain any more
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
If it makes your day a little less stressful, 80% of Spaniards under thirty still live at home with their parents
source: thelocal.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Sure, who wouldn't want to live on a former World War II-era bombing range?
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: The truth about leap years
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSTU FOX 13)
 
 
 
Mormon church tells members to give Book of Mormon 5 stars on Amazon, zero stars to Big Love
source: fox13now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
"Barrington High School would like to apologize for holding the mock slave auction. Our hearts were in the right place"
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Indonesia plans to toughen its drug laws by force-feeding convicted dealers with their confiscated drugs until they die. Oh, and guarding prisons with tigers, crocodiles and piranhas
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
The school bus is late picking up your snowflake. Do you C) barge into school, throw a hissy fit, and resist arrest. Bonus: bring along your crack and pipe
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
13 bald eagles found dead in Maryland. 13, the same number as the original colonies. Bald eagle...the bird of America. National Treasure 3 viral campaign?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Federal law prevents the VA from providing IVF treatment to those who became infertile because of combat injuries. "Thanks for your service, but you're on your own with this"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Federal Judge overturns Indiana Governor Mike Pence's ban on Syrian refugees
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Here are enough creepy pictures of an abandoned New Jersey jail to haunt your dreams for weeks
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Record)
 
 
 
Police seeking Roomba bandits. Suspects described as 'neat-freak geeks'
source: dailyrecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WREG Memphis)
 
 
 
Memphis zoo welcomes ugly-ass, 5-foot-tall baby giraffe
source: wreg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: My husband and I have a 4-year-old daughter, and I have a 10-year-old daughter from a previous marriage. My husband's family does not send gifts to my 10-year-old; they act like she doesn't exist. What should I do?" This one sounds real
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Radikal Foto)
 
 
 
Photoshop this less than classic painting
source: s017.radikal.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
It's St. David's Day, so here's a Welsh emoji keyboard
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Catholic priest "caught snorting cocaine in Nazi room." Wait, what?
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
In Clear Channel America, billboards watch you
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
"...backers of the legislation cautioned that allowing women to go topless at beaches will create a slippery slope where women are going topless at public libraries and Little League baseball games"
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
It doesn't get much more Australian than taking your pet snake for a swim while drinking
source: au.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Self-described "fat activist" who admits that having a baby made her uncomfortable with her body poses in her underwear with her belly on display to reclaim her confidence. Thanks a lot Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
How warm is it in Alaska this winter? They had to haul snow into Anchorage by train for the Iditarod
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Google admits that it might bear "some responsibility" for one of its self-driving cars smashing into a bus. Golly, that's mighty big of them
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Turns out faking your disappearance at sea is illegal. Take it from this guy facing charges
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon February 29, 2016
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Alfalfa sprouts are being recalled yet again due to salmonella and e.coli contamination, what a little rascal
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Fox News: 175-lb. man kicked off plane because he was too heavy. Reality: Man kicked off because the plane was overloaded, and he was the last to board. His metric ton of butthurt didn't help much
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spin Magazine)
 
 
 
You want to see Iggy Pop naked? (Not safe for work)
source: spin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these nuts
source: glossophilia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Beautiful microscopic images of tears reveal how chopping onions, eating spicy food and crying at the first 10 minutes of "Up" make each drop unique
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Apple keeps the Fed away
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier-Journal)
 
 
 
Parents rent drug-sniffing dogs to search teens' bedrooms. Your dog wants a trenchcoat, a straight shot of bourbon, and the rotten truth
source: courier-journal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
No, the The Fifth Circuit's case does not hold water
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Detroit police hoping to identify woman struck by car while walking in the middle of the interstate at night while wearing dark clothes, possibly just to ask her 'what the hell?'
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Bill O'Reilly loses custody of his children despite being a socially conservative family value man. You can't explain that
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
What happens at the bachelor party in Bratislava stays at the bachelor party in Bratislava. Unless you never get to Bratislava
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Salmonella? In my spice cabinet? It's more likely than you think
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
90 year old grandma diagnosed with uterine cancer given three choices by doctors. Did she choose: a) surgery, b) radiation or c) chemotherapy? Ha.Trick question. She chose d) ROAD TRIP
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Knob)
 
 
 
Photoshop this handle on things
source: st.hzcdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
The mummified body of a German adventurer has been discovered on his abandoned yacht - which silently drifted around the world for years. Scooby, Shaggy and the gang ready themselves for a new adventure (Graphic content warning: link has a pic of the dead body)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
'Three Men and a Baby' updated for 2016 by replacing 'Baby' with 'Rocket launcher'
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Pick-up truck carrying a canister of highly radioactive Iridium-192 has been stolen in San Juan del Rio, Mexico. Suspect is described at 3 ft tall, green, and dressed in a Roman military outfit, and may be carrying a space modulator
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
They are already golfing in Nova Scotia. Thanks El Nino
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Today's helpful tip from the Detroit Free Press: Watch your child for signs of lead exposure as they grow
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
Snapchat staff member dashes chances for Employee of the Month award
source: thestack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 New York)
 
 
 
Sometimes you want to send a message only a severed horse's head will convey. And sometimes you have trouble getting it into the apartment so you leave it in the park
source: fox5ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
China found to be stealing military technology from Norway, as they've apparently stopped stealing it from the US after getting a good look at the plans for the F-35
source: thelocal.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Pros of being a small-town mayor: Fame, civic pride, and big dinners. Cons: The sewer guy retired, so you have to climb down a manhole once a day to make sure the town's poop is still flowing
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Al Jazeera is a model of how journalism should be, claims Al Jazerra
source: america.aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
First Boeing 727 ever made will take its final flight. The plane was first used by United Airlines in 1963 and passengers still remember the thrill of arriving at their final destination in 1972
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
All officers, shots fired shots fired, need backup...oh wait, it's just kids popping balloons
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
It's like hunting cape buffalo. They're nasty, they're smart, and they won't hesitate to charge
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
If you're wondering how the Long Island man's 3 million mile 1966 Volvo is doing, it's now up to 3,273,895 miles, or enough to circle the Earth 126 times
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
NewsFlash
 
Clarence Thomas asked questions
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
When asking friends to help you move remember that your memory foam mattress has a memory also
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
U.S. concludes that the cyber attack on Ukrainian power grid was highly sophisticated. Possibly much more sophisticated than the Ukrainian power grid
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Families in China upset that the corpses of their dead female relatives are being dug up so the corpses can be "ghost married" to male corpses
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wimp)
 
 
 
Do you know what the 3, 4 or 5 digit code on your produce means? Behold, the story behind the numbers
source: wimp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Honest to god, if it's steamed carrots for lunch again I swear I'm burning this place to the ground
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Batman arrested for Robin tourist, a better mouse fap, and one-legged robber gets away on foot: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 2/21 -2/27
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
It's been six months since the Ashley Madison hack. Let's take a look at some of the conseq... OH LAWD
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Apple lawyer says if the company loses to the FBI it will "lead to a police state". As opposed to living in a free society with the choice to voluntarily pay three times as much for electronic products as they are worth
source: philadelphia.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: an Indiana Jones movie that we wish could be made
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
Vermont college bans Red Bull and 5-Hour-Energy drinks because of their link to alcohol and high-risk sex. Whereas before energy drinks, the biggest link for high-risk sex and using alcohol was going away to college
source: rt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Jakarta Post)
 
 
 
Transgender Islamic schools are a thing in Indonesia. Maybe not a thing as such but there's at least one of them. Was at least one of them
source: thejakartapost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
100 years ago a barge carrying a T square crossed the Charles River and turned Harvard into the second best school in Cambridge
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WorldWide Weird News)
 
 
 
And the flue season continues in Texas
source: worldwideweirdnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Idiot admits doing something idiotic in idiot country
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
"Well, everyone knew the rumours, and I saw another priest kissing boys, but it wasn't my fault children were being molested," says Vatican Cardinal
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Introducing the Forever Alone Chair™
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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