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Sun January 17, 2016
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
According to a new study, about half the people who go to the gym do so to try and hookup. The other half are women
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Driveway to hell
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Walking up escalators is bad. Here comes the science
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this judge
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
RIP Ernest Yazhe and thanks for your Navajo code talking
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop these ladies
source: pre10.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The Burmese python has only two natural predators, and 600 of one species are being released in the Everglades in an attempt to wipe them out
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
ISIS just seized a pot farm in Albania worth $8 billion a year. Fark: The Italian Mafia who own it are not too pleased
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
The Oregon LARPers have taken up road construction to fill the time between playing cowboys and soldiers on their hijacked Indian burial ground. This puts them one leatherman away from a Village People concert
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Forget about snowmen and cats, which animal is hiding in this black and white image? Yes, it's there. And yes, it's Sunday and we're bored
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
Everything an international student needs to know to survive those terrifying years abroad and surrounded by gun-loving Americans
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Estonia opens its ice roads with cheerful reminder to travellers not to fasten their seat belts and not to drive less than 25 mph or you'll die
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
The spot where Salem "witches" were executed has been found. It's called the biggest location of witch hunts ever discovered outside of the congressional hearing chambers
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
As if the people of Flint, Michigan haven't suffered enough, Cher is now involved in the water crisis there
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Record (UK))
 
 
 
Now that is some fine prison work there, Officer Lou
source: dailyrecord.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
Meet Hyperion, the world's tallest tree. And at 600 years old, it's still young and growing vigorously
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop the interior of the new SpaceX Dragon V2 spacecraft
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pitchfork)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Changes
source: pitchfork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Cannabist)
 
 
 
Most marijuana-related ER visits are due to symptoms of hyperventilation caused by anxiety. If only there was some harmless, natural herb that had a calming effect
source: thecannabist.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
You know it's cold outside when your eyeball gets frostbite
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
In the unlikely event you ever decide to give up coffee, here's what you need to know prepare for life without the most essential building block of life
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCVB Boston)
 
 
 
Police say Canadian woman hid 50 pounds of marijuana in her foosball table and NO, that is not a euphemism
source: wcvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Man calls 911, admits to shooting and killing his wife after argument over the coffee maker got out of hand
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming up at the top of the hour it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Two hours of music hosted live by a farker in Juneau, Alaska. (9PM AKST/10PM PT)
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat January 16, 2016
(Metro)
 
 
 
Pub offers breastfeeding mothers free tea after a nearby cafe bans them for their "unsightly" practice
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
The 4th prisoner released from Iran was probably Jason Bourne
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOB4)
 
 
 
"What's in a name?" Apparently not much
source: kob.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Beatles fan
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Police fear serial killer dubbed The Pusher is on the loose in Manchester and has killed 85 people by tossing them into canals
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Bottle feeding baby squirrels is illegal in Jersey. In other news, it's still legal in Jersey to bury toxic waste and dead mobsters in your basement
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flabulous fighter
source: img.fark.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Video of U.S. airstrike in Iraq shows millions of ISIS-bucks going up in smoke
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves / Did gyre and gimble in the wabe: / All manslaughtered were the Mims men / And the Florida Police outgrabe
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
You and your friend are arguing about who gets to run a right-wing, militia-based Facebook page. Do you: C) shoot your friend? (Hint: This is in Texas)
source: heralddemocrat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Crates of lobsters stolen from Nova Scotian fishery. At $6/pound, that's $27000 street value. Canada announces the War on Lobsters, Mountie interdiction task force started
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Hopefully, the blind mystic who predicted the '04 tsunami, 9/11, and the 44th president, was totally wrong about 2016
source: lostateminor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass panda Bei Bei takes first beibei steps at Washington Zoo
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Express Tribune (Pakistan))
 
 
 
Among the things you can be sent to prison for are murder, arson and tagging people on Facebook
source: tribune.com.pk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Boston Marathon bombing cost $101,124,027 according to judge who ordered Dzhokhar Tsarnaev to pay restitution
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Welcome to Fark thread #9,000,000. Enjoy
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Police, Homeland Security raid six strip mall massage parlors after hard, year-long investigation
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Although there's no rule against breaking into random houses and threatening to kill everybody inside, Massachusetts police will adopt voluntary guidelines to avoid future embarrassing incidents
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Seattle looks to pay somebody $10K to live in a bridge, proving that while trolling pays it doesn't pay all that well
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
British high court rules homeowners can beat up burglars without violating the burglar's human rights
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Iran frees four US prisoners
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Murderer given a sentence worse than death: Life in Arkansas
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PBS)
 
 
 
These two phrases you never want to see together: "perpetuated a complacent atmosphere" and "mistaken shipment of live anthrax"
source: pbs.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this killer granny
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Potomac Local)
 
 
 
Welcome to an extremely dusty Caturday (tissues recommended)
source: potomaclocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Wellness is mandatory. Are you feeling well, worker? Insufficient wellness will be punished by termination of insurance. Trust the Insurer. The Insurer is your friend
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
It turns out breakfast is the most important meal of the day only if you're a growing child or work in the fields. But if you live a sedentary lifestyle like the rest of us fat asses, pass on that plate of waffles and don't eat until lunch
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
You know you live in a crappy apartment when your walls are infested with bats. "It's bad, it sounds like there are 20 or 30 in there"
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Who knew going down a slide while wearing a scarf could be so dangerous?
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(11 Alive)
 
 
 
Atlanta is about to lose another historic landmark to gentrification. Fark: It's known as the "Murder Kroger," and not without reason
source: 11alive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Herbal Womb Detox Pills? In MY vagina?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
That Taco Bell bro who served a beat supreme to an Uber driver is suing the driver for $5 million because why not go all in?
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri January 15, 2016
(Fark)
 
 
 
Time for the Weird News Quiz, if you're bored and think your memory is still what it was as recently as last year
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
If you think of Yosemite National Park as a haven for nature, a place to experience all that is good and pure, in a landscape untainted by commercialism, you're wrong. Just like the rest of the world, it's being ruined by greedy assholes
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
Just how much does the lottery prey on the poor? People who make less than $10,000 spend on average $597 on lottery tickets - about 6 percent of their income
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
The feds want states to lower their drunk driving limits again. Naturally, the American Beverage Institute has a problem with this
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Space walk almost turns into space swim
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
The Loch Ness Monster has eluded scientists and adventurers for centuries but it may finally be solved - after experts said it could be an umbrella stand. Wait, what?
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
YallQaeda member steals U.S. Fish and Wildlife truck and changes the name tag on the door, then drives into town, where he's promptly arrested outside of a Safeway. The Aristohicks
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Now that the issuing of same-sex marriage licenses in Alabama has been banned, a new judge tries to one-up everyone by calling for an end to common-law marriages
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Plans to convert a World War II concentration camp into a four to five star luxury beach resort is raising a fuhrer
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Ways to combat global warming
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
People are jumpy enough without your description of how your Marine Corps training would help you kill students, Mr. Committee Chairman
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LAist)
 
 
 
Pomona's Powerball 'prizewinner'; pitiful prank by punk-ass progeny
source: laist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Don't steal your own urine if you can't do the time
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Most Canadian smuggler award goes to the guy that tried to bring 182 pounds of Xanax across the border with a sled
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Public Broadcasting)
 
 
 
A new bunch of gun lovers show up at the occupied Malheur Wildlife Refuge--and denounce the militia idiots by tearing down their signs
source: opb.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(GMX)
 
 
 
Photoshop this salutation
source: i2.gmx.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Problem: You're a city official who really wants to have an older woman in the photo-op you've assembled for your snow shoveling program, but there's no older woman handy. Solution: Put a middle-aged guy in a dress and wig. Surely nobody will notice
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Woman who won one-third of billion-dollar Powerball completely misses point: "I'll be at my job come Monday"
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Welsh town erects a massive pile of WTF in public square (pics)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
♩ Clampdown testers sing this song, vod-ka, vod-ka ♩
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
You no longer have to pretend to be interested in someone to get to play with their pug
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Pair of armed robbers mown down by three men riding a combine harvester
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Memphis Commercial Appeal)
 
 
 
First rule of winning Powerball: claim your prize first. Not appear on the Today Show, then call your neighbors to put up 'no trespassing signs, THEN claim the prize
source: commercialappeal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Impromptu Bay Area Fark party - in the Mission district
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Bike Thieves a problem in your area? No problem, let me introduce you to the Electric Bike Seat. ZAAAAPPPPPPPPPP
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Russian police say if they ever catch pastafarians driving their cars without a colander on their heads, they'll take away their licenses
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
You know your rescue bears are feeling better when they swarm a food truck
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Baby elephant rejected by herd finds new family, dog
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Journal)
 
 
 
Italian village with shrinking population pleads with elderly to "defy death"
source: digitaljournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
Two horses, a mule, and a miniature horse returned after they escape a Tempe corral. ESCAPE A TEMPE, CORRAL
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toledo Blade)
 
 
 
Black card: "How did seven people get fired from a TV station?" White card: "Playing Cards Against Humanity while at work"
source: toledoblade.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
Strike marijuana off the list. Next up, a trial for ketchup based painkiller. Any volunteers?
source: news.nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Don't cry over spilt milk. Don't use your wife as a human mop either
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Refugees from war-torn Syria welcome in war-torn Detroit
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hawaii News Now)
 
 
 
Helicopter carrying 6 Marines collides with helicopter carrying 6 Marines. Debris scattered over 2.5 mile area. Search-and-rescue op in progress
source: hawaiinewsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Vancouver, B.C. police seeking information on three men seen videotaping the entrances and exits at Pacific Centre Mall
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Sometimes a man's got to do what a man has to to get money for his son's cancer treatment - which in this case is dressing up as a woman and selling flowers in the Beijing Metro
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(14 News Evansville)
 
 
 
Just another food cart vendor selling candy, popcorn, sex toys, nachos. Wait, what?
source: 14news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Officer: Before I pat you down, do you have anything that could stick me?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Child asks his dad for advance on his allowance. Dad responds by writing a rejection letter from The Bank of Dad
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
This year's Martin Luther King Day "you had ONE job" moment comes to us courtesy of the Air Force
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for flashing her breasts and throwing grilled meat at her trailer park neighbors during an argument
source: offthebeat.blogs.tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this great day for activity
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
♫Winter time, and the weather is freezing. Fish are jumping, and the.....♫....Oh crap. A little help here
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Woman creates "Powerball Reimbursement " Go Fund Me page because she spent all her money on lottery tickets, gets $800 in first 7 hours
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vanity Fair)
 
 
 
Spending the night with Ammon Bundy. "You are truly going to witness the cream of humanity's moral possibility here"
source: vanityfair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
How to deal with that one annoying guy at the office who always loves to rub it in when you don't win the lottery. "I wonder where I'm going for lunch today with all the money I saved by not throwing it away on the lottery"
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(From the Grapevine)
 
 
 
Now that he's gone, instead of calling it 'Mars,' maybe we should all call it 'Bowie'
source: fromthegrapevine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Houston school board may change the names of schools named after Confederate leaders like Lee High School, Stonewall Jackson Middle School, and Reagan High School
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Ya'll Qaeda may be getting the confrontation they want, but not with cops or Feds. Hunters, anglers and environmentalists planning anti-occupation protests in Portland and Bend next week
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
🎵You say "new-FOUND-land, I say "new-found-LAND", Let's shoot each other in the gut🎵
source: news.nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
WHO: "The West African Ebola outbreak is over." Sierra Leone: "Uh... not so fast there"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
A woman moved to Maine because she wanted to be alone, and they didn't find her body for 2 1/2 years
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu January 14, 2016
(The Local)
 
 
 
Sperm thieving scandal throws greyhound race into a spin, as a bunch of jerks stole a dog to try to come into money
source: thelocal.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
19th-Century Medical DrawingsNOPENOPENOPE (graphic illustrations)
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Hello AAA? I need a new tire and a clean pair of underwear
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
From the "paperwork will be quick on this one" department: man flees cops on foot, falls to his death off overpass, landing in cemetery
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Ever wonder why you become such an a-hole when you're behind the wheel?
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these vintage radios
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
You're one of the prettiest patients I've ever come across
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Weekly)
 
 
 
Has there been a weirder Internet fundraiser than an auction of Jeffrey Dahmer's drawings to purchase & display the rusted hulk of Jayne Mansfield's death car in Hollywood?
source: laweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Magazine)
 
 
 
Planned Parenthood has filed a lawsuit against the Center for Medical Progress invoking RICO statues. Good
source: nymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Man pulls up to car dealer in Zhanjiang, Guangdong with small change wanting to buy a van.... then things get weird with math
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man runs nude along public street in attempt to turn his luck around, fails miserably
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
...Unless you screw up Valentine's Day
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
Thanks to the generosity of people like you, thrift stores are bursting at the seams with outdated clothes, uncomfortable furniture and useless appliances
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Now you can be arrested just for mocking and shaming somebody. In Oregon. By morons. Fark Politics Tab monitoring situation closely
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Dear Carolyn: I don't want my sisters and brothers to feel bad, but my children are smarter than their children
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC GoodFood)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Which hearty soups help you shake off that winter chill and keep you going? Share to the right
source: bbcgoodfood.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Russian official charged with stealing 50km of roadway. No, not money for 50km of roadway. He actually stole the farking road
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
10% of Americans would make amateur porn for $1 million. Judging by the Internet, the other 90% is significantly undercutting them
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Words you would use to describe North Korea : totalitarian, hellhole, awful. Words a Wall Street "daredevil investor uses: "young, highly disciplined, strong military-industrial complex,.. early investors will be rewarded with massive appreciation"
source: mobile.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bristol Post (UK))
 
 
 
If a porn star and a professional wrestler can't make love work, is there really any hope for the rest of us?
source: bristolpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Racial discrimination charges levelled against auto dealer, surprising many who thought that used car salesmen might be above such things
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Day)
 
 
 
Two accidents, one fatal, occur along notorious stretch of Interstate 95 in CT in 2 days. DOT spokesman: The highway is fine. Maybe if you people didn't suck at driving
source: theday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this topfull train
source: cdn3.spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
NHC has upgraded extra-tropical storm Alex to extra-extra-tropical hurricane Alex
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Is a winter in Florida too cold for you? Do you put on a sweater when it drops to eighty degrees? Do you wonder why the rest of the country thinks you're insane?
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Teen banned from drinking alcohol after pressuring underage girl into sex... oh, and also setting fire to a sheep
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: Some guy I barely know asked me to be the best man at his wedding. Can I turn him down and still hope for an invite?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
Behold, the majestic Assfish
source: news.nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
 
 
 
Carjackers foiled by stick shift. Kids these days
source: triblive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Spanish farmer who thought he came up with an ingenious way to pay off his debts comes up short handed
source: thelocal.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Visir)
 
 
 
After years of banking implosions and volcano explosions, Iceland's young people have reached the conclusion that there is no god
source: icelandmag.visir.is   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Guys are there times when you don't.......you know........feel fresh.........uh down....there? Well now there's Nadkins for that all day feeling of sunshine
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Elderly woman previously arrested for driving drunk while wearing only a bikini arrested again--for the same crime
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Valley Central)
 
 
 
Actually, this explains a lot about why Bugs Bunny acted the way he did
source: valleycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
The collapse of Big Oil will result in a New World Order
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Raw food restauranteur and serial genital exposer appears in court...looking exactly as you thought
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Probation officer sentenced to probation for lying about alleged probation of a probationer
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
For the first time in 200 years, England to consider replacing "God Save the Queen" as its national anthem. Americans immediately offer the very singable "To Anacreon in Heaven"
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Man throws loads of money to the heavens at bus stop, passersby pick up the cash and hand it over to the police. Have you people no morals?
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Well if you're driving recklessly and being chased by cops, why NOT steal a police cruiser after you crash your own car?
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
El Chapo's cartel may exact revenge on Sean Penn for indirectly causing the drug czar's capture
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Life imitates Seinfeld as a man who videotaped teenage crash victims instead of helping them will spend 30 days in jail
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Just another night for both customers and employees of one Cobb County Waffle House
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Iraqi refugee plotted to bomb Texas malls and had a stockpile of cell phones he was learning to convert into remote detonators for ISIS, says FBI agent who has never posed as a cell phone wholesaler
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
California wingsuiter makes unscheduled canyon wall landing
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Behold, the Poopmaster 6000
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Popcorn hater wants all popcorn banned in all theaters because popcorn makes noise while it's eaten, y'all
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tree thrower
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Your gut microbiota is so messed up, you'll need to go back in time and kill your great great grandparents to fix it. P.S. Could you take out Hitler while you're passing through 1920?
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AlterNet)
 
 
 
Marijuana legalization has been such a disaster that Colorado has seen an 80% drop in possession, cultivation and distribution charges, plus they've seen $125 million in increased tax revenue. Yep. A disaster
source: alternet.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Better ball Saul
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
For the record, the microchip embedded in your dog is not a GPS, and it's no substitute for a good old fashioned collar and tag
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
President Hollande: "It is unacceptable that in our country citizens feel so frightened and assaulted because of their religious choices." Muslims? No, Jews
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Nature is not like a Disney movie
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Edge (Ireland))
 
 
 
How to troll a store that prints personalised Nutella jars like a BOSS with rude names
source: dailyedge.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
You are not a winner. You didn't just make billions. Your life has not changed. Your bills are still going to pile in. You're a Powerball loser, and the entire internet shares your pain
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HelenaIR.com)
 
 
 
Drunk, off-duty police officer calls a party-goer "an ISIS," pulls a gun on him, and asks him what the capital of Thailand is; doesn't even give the guy time to respond
source: helenair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
Would-be robbers stopped by T-mobile employee with a gun. No word on what happens to customers who come in to complain about their crappy cell reception
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
"By the way... is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?"
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Bombs and gunfire in Jakarta
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 558: "Animals 2" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed January 13, 2016
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
Tonight's winning Powerball numbers are 8 , 27, 34, 4, 19 and Powerball 10. Anybody here win? If so, you're looking quite attractive *eyebrow wiggle*
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Best Korea says nuclear test shows it could 'wipe out' US... assuming the US is a tiny piece of driftwood floating in the Sea of Japan
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NOAA)
 
 
 
A Tropical Storm? At this time of year? In that part of the ocean? This seems... not good
source: nhc.noaa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Colorado Springs Gazette)
 
 
 
Designer of new restaurant at the summit of Pikes Peak hopes visitors will have a "Titanic moment." Hopefully he means the "King of the world" moment and not the "Oh shiat we're all dead" moment
source: gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters Media)
 
 
 
Photoshop this reasonable reaction
source: s3.reutersmedia.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Picked up your Powerball ticket yet? Here's an interesting factoid: winning it could kill you
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Ladies and gentlemen, here it is -- the only David Bowie tribute you need to hear. I present to you, "Cathedral Bells Ringing Out Space Oddity"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
National Guard activated, dispatched to Flint as door-to-door water distributors
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Joaquín 'El Chapo' Guzmán:"Sean Penn? Never heard of her"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Colombian drug lord sentenced to 11 years in New Jersey
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Three Words: Emotional Support Turkey
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(13 News Now)
 
 
 
It's not uncommon for local politicians to evade questions during a city council meeting. Evading the police in a high speed chase afterwards is a bit unusual, however
source: 13newsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
World's oldest man found. He's a Brazilian
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNSNews)
 
 
 
Man who told a nanny she was pushing a dead baby in a stroller and then followed her home has been found naked on the couch in a psychotherapist's office. Wait, what?
source: cnsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
The ranch in the Badlands where Teddy Roosevelt once lived and where he developed his love of the West that would later spur his conservation efforts, including founding the National Park System, is about to be turned into a strip mine
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Oh, it just keeps getting better. A self-appointed "U.S. Superior Court Judge" has arrived at Camp Freedumb to charge local authorities with various crimes
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these moves like Jagger
source: cbsnews1.cbsistatic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Good deed turns out as expected
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Waffle House: "We ASKED our employees not to wash their hair in the pots of cooking water, what more did you want us to do?"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Vanilla ISIS goes actual ISIS
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Bay Area)
 
 
 
Firefighters rescue woman treading chicken
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Things you don't want to hear your grandmother saying while you're LOOKING for a tractor to rescue her: "It's all gone up my bum I hate my life"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Dutch woman knits life-size replica of her son because he didn't want to cuddle her anymore. With "ewwwwwww" pic
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
Extremely venomous yellow-bellied sea snake washes up on California beach for the first time in 40 years. Thanks Oniño
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Adelaide Now)
 
 
 
Oh look, a car with an engine fire. Wait, is that a new Maserati?
source: adelaidenow.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
For all of you who've ever lain awake at night wondering whether to spend your last 100 bucks on a hunting trip or a prostitute, here's the answer
source: thelocal.at   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Sorry, goat cuddler, the roster is full
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 Now Fort Myers)
 
 
 
Florida man in mourning after tornado destroys his plastic yard animal collection
source: fox4now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
A look at why lottery players have such a hard time holding onto any of their winnings. Hm...I'm gonna bet that it's because the sort of people who play the lottery to begin with are morons. *reads article* Hey, I win
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
News: MH370 search team finds something of interest. Fark: a 19th century shipwreck. You had one job
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Google: Our driverless cars have never crashed. Safety experts: What about those 13 times the human passenger had to intervene at the last minute to avoid one? Google: Our driverless cars have never crashed
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Having a tattoo of a vacuum cleaner on your crotch really sucks (not safe for workish)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A look at how big your retirement fund should be at every age. Or, if you prefer, a handy chart for quantifying how screwed you are
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Another week, and what have you done? Three more words written and ideas far flung. Will you regale us with tales of the past? The present? The future? All things must pass. THIS is your Fark Writer's thread "Leaving on a jet plane" edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times Union)
 
 
 
Cable company: You died? Here's your early-termination fee
source: blog.timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Man dead after church he was living in burns down. No word on Alice or Facha, the dog
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Old guy wins a knife fight with a 450 pound bear. On his front porch. With a 50-cent steak knife. Because... Florida?
source: apalachtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Remember: Tomorrow, if you learn that your Powerball numbers hit, take a moment to make sure you're holding the correct day's ticket before you walk away from your desk and tell your boss to shove it
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time (Images))
 
 
 
Photoshop this day at the office
source: timedotcom.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 96.5 Florida)
 
 
 
Extremely good-looking dog flashes a big smile whenever someone tells him to "say cheese"
source: news965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Even if it's just Uber, keep your opinion of the Eagles to yourself (link updated)
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
102-year-old woman known as 'Granny' is the oldest teacher in America, tells her students to get off her desk
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Yorker)
 
 
 
Fark cancer. But first, let me finish this surgery
source: newyorker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
I miss the good old days when dynamite was a perfectly acceptable way to remove snow
source: thinkmaine.bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Del Norte Triplicate)
 
 
 
Prosecutors move to exclude hidden video evidence in a drug raid that shows various officers pocketing cash from the suspect and property that mysteriously disappeared and was found being sold on craigslist because it hurts their case
source: triplicate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Lego changes bulk buy policy after backlash over refusing to sell bricks to Chinese artist Ai Weiwei who wanted to make an artwork on political dissidents
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Zoiks, the Zika virus is in the United States
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Suffering from lower back pain? Exercise
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Y'all Qaeda: Please stop sending us dildos
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Another intelligence official's personal account hacked, and this time it's the phone of James Clapper, the Director of National Intelligence. In an ironic touch, phone calls were forwarded to the Free Palestine Movement
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue January 12, 2016
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Forbes arguing about LSD is like your dad telling you about the joys of speed metal, or the Christian Science Monitor extolling the virtues/drawbacks of hot anal sex
source: blog.sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Marijuana growers want champagne-like labels for pot aimed at the discerning consumer
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
"Oh, that'll buff right out"
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Right Wing Watch)
 
 
 
Pat Robertson believes that Rock music uses Indian beats to raise demons
source: rightwingwatch.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
The ugliest-assed 4-week-old gray seal pup you'll find washed up on a Long Island beach all day
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
George Bush mounts dead monkey heads is not as entertaining as you would think
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this nice bath
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
SCOTUS looks poised to legalize theft of services
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
How getting that catfish surgically removed from your stomach can help you feel 20 years younger
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
New Texan gun laws backfire on open carry enthusiasts
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
"Once, the table was set for dessert so haphazardly that my spoon ended up next to my water glass instead of my plate"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOB4)
 
 
 
U.S.: Where did our ships go? Iran: Oh, these were your ships, United States? So sorry about that. Here they are back
source: kob.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
The Supreme Court rules Florida's death penalty is unconstitutional, undoubtedly because no one there is mentally competent to stand trial
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Mark Cuban's advice for whoever wins the $1.4 billion Powerball lottery
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlas Obscura)
 
 
 
Ever wondered how long those Taco Bell hot sauce packets in your glove box are good for?
source: atlasobscura.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
What's worse than finding a weasel in your salad? Finding half a weasel
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida police need help identifying man hit by car. Now I'm no genius, but I'd guess he's the one covered in tire tracks
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters Media)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man putting his foot down
source: s3.reutersmedia.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Study shows that to get rid of your sweet tooth you should eat less sugar
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
The latest addition to the Marvel Cinematic Universe? Florida Man and his sidekick, Other Florida Man
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Drunken woman arrested while paying court fines, in latest proof that it's always better to just stay home and drink
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Alien abductions? Nope, just Best Korea running an (even for them) extremely weird program
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Common food additive found to cause cancer... wait CURE cancer. Fark it, I give up
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Being hangry is an evolutionary response to hunger. Ergo creationism should make dieting super easy
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Pixel analysis shows North Korea faked missile footage
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Oregon judge plans on billing people that can't afford snacks 70k a day for their patriotic land use
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Meals on wheels charity unwittingly tries to give pensioners shinier coats, healthier teeth
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Breeze)
 
 
 
Guys, this is a stick up. Guys. Stick. Up
source: dailybreeze.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
If you're a window washer and are asked which two words you really don't want to hear - "scaffolding dangling" would be at the top of the list
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Whisky, haggis, golf and other things that aren't actually Scottish
source: scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
A private tax system that saves the wealthiest billions using this one weird trick
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Because, let's face it ... anytime you see the words "industrial accident at the mulch company," things likely didn't end well
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hull Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Tortoises killed by slow-moving fire
source: hulldailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Prolific British bicycle thief becomes the first person to be given a lifetime ban not just from from riding a bike, but from going within four metres of a bike for the rest of his life
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Actually, it's about ethics in interviewing escaped drug cartel kingpins
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Montana Standard)
 
 
 
And you thought Costco's samples were finger lickin' good
source: mtstandard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox5 DC)
 
 
 
Ways to make sure you get your cut if your office lottery pool wins big -- without using a metal bat
source: fox5dc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
British trains delayed due to freak weather condition called "bright sunshine"
source: standard.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
That's not an UFO, it's a streetlight "emerging from a space-time portal in the sky"
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Televangelist Jim Bakker blames the "Spirit of ISIS" for the extreme weather the US is experiencing, his low gas mileage, and that time he stubbed his toe yesterday morning
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charlotte Observer)
 
 
 
KKK leader convicted of executing a 16-year-old black girl with a crossbow is being reviewed by the North Carolina Parole Commission because he says he found God. No word if he also murdered God with a crossbow
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Northampton Herald & Post)
 
 
 
Has the Grim Reaper been captured on camera at an English graveyard? (No)
source: northampton-news-hp.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Photoshop this avian photobomb
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Even in Wales, 80 straight days of rain is considered excessive: "We've had rain of biblical proportions"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
After getting called a fattie and dumped by her boyfriend, girl sends her ex a bar of soap made from her own fat. Revenge is cleanly hers
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
11-year-old girl aces her IQ test with a perfect 162 score, says she only took the test because she figured an impressive score might be an effective way to stop her parents from nagging her to study
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Vulture causes power outage in Florida. People affected by it try to keep calm and carrion
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Second-hand store valor protected by 1st Amendment
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Explosion in Istanbul's tourist area of Sultanahmet. Live-updating
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 10 Mobile)
 
 
 
♫ I hung the Sheriff ♪ And was discovered by the deputy ♫
source: fox10tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFPL Louisville)
 
 
 
It's official: Governor Matt Bevin is dismantling Kynect, the health insurance exchange that covers 500,000 Kentuckians. Why? Because, fark you
source: wfpl.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Y'all Qaeda attention whores have taken up destroying federal property
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
SUICIDAL DEER - Next 5 Miles
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Researchers from the University of Maryland find specific brand of chocolate milk that happens to be produced by the university's sponsor aids athletes in concussion recovery
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon January 11, 2016
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
General Mills: Our yogurt is low calorie. That's good. Chobani: But it's laced with potassium sorbate. That's bad. Dannon: Our yogurt is low calorie. That's good. Chobani: But it's laced with sucralose. That's bad. GM & Dannon: YOU'RE GONNA GET SUED
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Cincinnati Zoo names ugly-ass baby penguin after David Bowie, complete with ugly-ass picture
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
Hey thief, is that a python in your pants or are you .....hey that IS a python in your pants
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
1906 San Francisco earthquake leaves no survivors
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: The stars look very different today
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Affluenza mom's lawyer: "Just play dumb"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this ship sight
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
US now fighting ISIS in the most American way possible: Literally throwing money at the problem
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
If you recently lost a foot, BART authorities would like to have a word with you. You may also want to check into the nearest emergency room
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(620 WDAE Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
You're telling me you've never had an all female, bikini wearing, Mahjong pool party before? Sure you haven't
source: 620wdae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Well, it's "No Pants Day" on the DC Metro, and what have we learned? Mainly that pants exist for a reason
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Fox News continues its tradition of sound economic policy by telling viewers to "buy as many lottery tickets as you can afford"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
In what's starting to become de rigeur among the criminal set, the Walmart-engagement sex-toy-bandit couple has set up a GoFundMe page
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Caption this wet babe
source: image.pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Your slow cooker may be slowly killing you by slowly leeching lead into your slow-cooked food
source: blog.grasslandbeef.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 96.5 Florida)
 
 
 
Bison named Sparky who was struck by lightning in 2013 is still doing well and has even fathered three calves, tentatively named Smokey, Ash, and of course Rod
source: news965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TASS News Russia)
 
 
 
Photoshop this takeoff
source: photocdn2.itar-tass.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
Experts conclude that if you're good enough to write a meaningful message with bullets in Call Of Duty, you're probably wasted in terrorist communications
source: thestack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(41 Action News)
 
 
 
The state of Kansas has found a solution to its budget problem: win the lottery. Oh PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE
source: kshb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
TarpMan's new novel features good ranchers, bad gubmint, guns, killing, cannibalism, guns, killing, the Constitution, a rampage against raw milk, and a cowboy lynching a mayor. And guns and killing
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 10 Phoenix)
 
 
 
News photographer gets an unwanted scoop as a $250,000 Rolls-Royce plows into the side of his yard
source: fox10phoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
North Carolina in your vagina? It's more likely than you think
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
ISIS gunmen attack Baghdad mall, reportedly after being denied a new outlet for their brand-name store Beheading Butchery and Beyond
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Random Cop: Hello, I'm from the DEA. Can I have your drugs? Sheriffs department: Sure. We aren't using them
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Drones to be used in coyote hunt after traps baited with watermelon fail. If only they'd tried baiting traps with sun dried zucchini, or maybe Big League Chew
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Magazine)
 
 
 
Fark parents: Here's how to awkwardly talk about sex with your kids
source: nymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Milton Keynes Citizen)
 
 
 
It's weird, one minute you're just sitting there drinking 18 cans of Foster's Lager and the next you're dressed in a onesie and setting fire to your landlady's porch
source: miltonkeynes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Police are using your social media postings to calculate a threat score for you
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
The Kid's in the Hall, a license to krill and the difference between "one night stand" and "Mormon": some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 1/3 - 1/9
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Will new dietary guidelines make school lunches healthier, or will they always be questionable?
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Las Vegas casinos are seeing tremendous losses as people realize gambling makes no sense
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(GMX)
 
 
 
Photoshop these skiers
source: i0.gmx.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Massachusetts politicians head to Colorado to "study" marijuana
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
CAN ADA
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billboard)
 
NewsFlash
 
David Bowie dies following an 18-month battle with cancer. The music world mourns
source: billboard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Mind Unleashed)
 
 
 
81 percent of the products in a Dollar Store contain chemicals that make people more likely to shop in Dollar Stores
source: themindunleashed.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Spidermonkey)
 
 
 
Under Maryland law, one can be in a special legal status whereby they're not allowed to have sex with anyone. In the rest of the country it's simply called "marriage"
source: carrollcountytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Two years after the water crisis in Flint began, governor Snyder is finally providing the city with clean drinking water
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
American woman found murdered in Italy. Authorities plan to blame a Satanic alien plot, arrest a French woman, convict two Africans of the murder, then try a British woman for the crime
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
Buried power cables abandoned by Coast Guard are now exploding, hurling one woman and her beach chair ten feet into into a rock jetty
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Iraqi dam on the brink of collapse could cause up to 500,000 deaths. Or, as they measure it in Iraq, about 0.8 George W. Bushes
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Woman suffering from Cyclical Vomiting Syndrome vomits up to 15 times an hour. In related news, CVS pharmacies consider name change
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Naked Portland violinist loses claim that cops infringed on constitutional rights by interrupting his solo performance outside federal courthouse. "The judge said Mglej's nudity didn't advance a specific message, so it wasn't protected"
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
China cancelled its One Child Policy because ratios of male to female hit 117 to 100. In Sweden the ratio is currently 123 to 100
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Twenty-one benefits of having a cat - summed up in cartoon form
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
While NASA gets by on a shoestring, Americans spend four times its budget annually ... on lottery tickets
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South Florida News-Press)
 
 
 
Fark this house, fark that house, fark this garbage can in particular
source: news-press.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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