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Sun December 13, 2015
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Does this pollution make me look fat?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Santa Claus as an action hero
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Filming Cops)
 
 
 
Don't be poor in Austin and get a traffic ticket
source: filmingcops.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Decider)
 
 
 
The Empire was a force for good, trying to stop space terrorists and Star Wars is the story of the radicalization of Luke Skywalker as a space-jihadist. It's not news, it's The New York Post
source: decider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
When everyone is out to get you, paranoid is just good thinking. Then there's this guy
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this politician's new blanket
source: l2.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Guy wins $21.5 million lawsuit against Holland American for injuries he received from faulty cruise ship door, then things get interesting
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABL13 Houston)
 
 
 
The Clone Wars have begun
source: abc13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Three year old's Princess Chewbacca birthday cake is awesome, better than anything Lucas has done since 1989
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Even though Star Wars: The Force Awakens comes out on Friday...or Thursday night if you want to get technical, here's another trailer for you to try to resist watching
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
What would be your "Hell on Earth" job? Junior high-school principal? Gilbert Gottfried's wet nurse? Daycare worker? You can think it over
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
A not-obsessed-at-all man built a lifesize McNugget vending machine entirely out of LEGOs. Fark: A working McNugget vending machine
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
U.S. and Cuba agree to restore direct mail service between the two countries for the first time since 1963. For you lawn invaders reading this, this is what is called "snail mail" and requires something called a "stamp" and ...oh, nevermind
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you work at the local fire department you probably shouldn't take a picture of a life-sized Santa Claus doll plastered to the grill of a fire truck and post it on Twitter with a caption letting followers know Santa isn't coming this year
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Utah People's Post)
 
 
 
Christmas may be the "happiest time of the year," but researchers have long noted an increase in depression, divorce and worse during the holidays. And that's not even to mention you poor saps out there who happen to be werewolves
source: utahpeoplespost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Shedd aquarium needs help naming ugly ass baby dolphin. If only there were a select group of online denizens who could assist in this matter
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, and to round out the list, sex
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It's bad enough when your grandmother-in-law tells you to cut your hair to a more sensible length. It's even worse when your grandmother-in-law is the Queen of England
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lazy day
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: First Fark
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Organized crime, theft, counterfeiting, rustling, poisoning. This is the gritty reality of beekeeping. Wait, what?
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
While his classmates took cushy jobs being weathermen on TV and the radio, this guy took a job at the nation's most remote weather station located 300 miles off the west coast of mainland Alaska in the Bering Sea. "Our data is pretty precious"
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Phase 1: Steal limo with passengers inside to be 'funny'. Phase 2: ???????? Phase 3: Go to jail for kidnap/false imprisonment, grand theft auto and resisting arrest
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Silo fire burning since Thanksgiving makes entire North Carolina town smell like delicious sweet potatoes
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chronicle Herald)
 
 
 
84 year old fondly remembers drive through photo kiosks
source: thechronicleherald.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
I've heard of wake up calls but this is ridiculous
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTNV Las Vegas)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready headline: Tom Collins arrested for DUI
source: ktnv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
"I just want to be a father to my children, a good father who'll try to teach them the right way so I handed myself in to finish up those old charges, then I was brought into this sh-t and now I'm here in Chile"
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
The Columbus Zoo and Aquarium posts a video of an ugly-ass baby polar bear sleeping
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Grinch arrested during toy drive (with pic)
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Roll up for the ghost train, non-stop through the city. Step right up and show your face, we only want the pretty ones
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Remember how the IRS said that they would never call your house as some scammers have done? Well, about that
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Well played, Banksy. Well played
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Woman jumping out of 3rd floor window leaves onlooker feeling crushed
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MPR News)
 
 
 
Begun the Nerf Wars have
source: mprnews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming up at the top of the hour it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Two hours of music hosted live by a farker in Juneau, Alaska. (9PM AKST/10PM PT)
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Best cat fight subby has ever seen, and he was a regular at the Tropicana back in the day
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat December 12, 2015
(KTNV Las Vegas)
 
 
 
You've just stolen a box off some guy's porch. You open it and... OH, CRAP
source: ktnv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRDO Colorado Springs)
 
 
 
More than 200 kids do not attend class after third grader sends email randomly filled with emojis, including smiley faces, sheep, guns, cows, knives, and bombs to students. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: krdo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this smart aleck going by
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
When hoverboards are outlawed, only outlaws will ride hoverboards
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Surprise! I bet you didn't know we were going to rescue you
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
◉▽◉
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
A school in Detroit tries to recreate a classic episode of Barney Miller
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News On 6 Tulsa)
 
 
 
If you're going to pick a neighbor's house to burglarize, you should A: Make sure they aren't home. B: Not pick the home of an assistant district attorney and C: Especially an assistant DA who is handy with a gun
source: newson6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WDSU New Orleans)
 
 
 
How do you get liberals and conservatives to unite in outrage? City throws away homeless man's Christmas tree... twice
source: wdsu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Navy Times)
 
 
 
Brand spanking new Navy littoral combat ship breaks down before even making it to new home port
source: scoopdeck.navytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man in his office
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Still nope
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
The Navy's $700 million mine-hunting drone can't find explosives. Well technically it could, once
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBAL-TV Baltimore)
 
 
 
Sixty Six Sick Snakes Stinkin' up the place
source: wbaltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stoke Sentinel)
 
 
 
"My client is a disagreeable old trout, whose behavior is persistent, outrageous, and unpleasant. She is about as popular as a diesel Volkswagen"
source: stokesentinel.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Soooooooooo, anybody seen winter lately? No? Thanks, Global Warming
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
It's 2015. Who the hell still hosts a chicken pox party?
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Department of Corrections is very disappointed that a newspaper would report misconduct instead of helping them sweep it under the carpet. No, really, they said that
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(7 Deadly)
 
 
 
These purses are engineered to organize your paraphernalia and mask the smell of your weed stash using fabric layered in resin film. TL;DR Here's a $300 ziploc bag
source: 7deadlymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
More than ever, the snowflakes of today need to be protected from the ravages of Mark Twain
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The world's biggest douchebag is at it once again
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"I haven't had a single drop of alcohol or coffee in 15 months. A couple of my friends on Facebook & Twitter asked me to write about my experience, so here it is, in a nutshell: I save $1000 every month"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Farker's dream job: Getting paid eight-eighty an hour to review porn emails. Ultrafark: There's no decimal point in that eight-eighty
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
The world has reached a final climate agreement
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
★★★☆☆
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Okay. Apart from tarmac, telephones, crosswords, pencils, vacuum cleaners & driving on the wrong side of the road, WHAT have the British ever given us?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Mmmmmm delicious fermented fish intestines. The Romans sure knew how to live
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
With just 36 weeks to go before the 2016 Olympics, it's good to see Rio de Janeiro is SOOOOO ready to host them. Oh, wait
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
99-year-old woman wins shopping spree at 99 cent store, says she hopes to try her luck at Family Dollar next year
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 21 News)
 
 
 
Semi-truck overturns, spilling thousands of potatoes across highway and blocking traffic. Almost immediately, every eye was on that road
source: fox21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this show-and-tell moment
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Best babysitters or worst babysitters ever? This couple presented themselves fully nude when looking after a 7 year old
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Japanese company releases a scented spray meant to imitate the aroma of a cat's head - which they claim smells like "baked bread". Alrighty then... everyone grab your cat, sniff its head and tell us what it smells like on Caturday
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Headlines & Global News)
 
 
 
Old and Busted: 3D printed food. New Coolness: 3D printed shoes made from recycled material
source: hngn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Republican Mormon Senator from Arizona visits a mosque during afternoon prayer. Plot twist: He proudly stands in solidarity with the faithful. "We have much in common with our brothers and sisters in the Muslim faith; we have much to learn from them"
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
If you had a baby at Santa Clara Valley Medical Center in San Jose, California between mid-August 2015 and mid-November 2015 there is a chance you or your child could have been exposed to tuberculosis. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Another effect of climate change: Duration of a day has lengthened by a millisecond over the past 100 years. Well, at least we have more time now to address it
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Luckiest. Guy. Ever (with pic)
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Mother gets social media flak for buying her kids 300 Christmas gifts. "The way I see it is you can buy your kids two presents or 200 presents - it's the way you bring them up"
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Conversation)
 
 
 
Everybody hates millennials. "At a recent meeting I attended on academic leadership at the University of Wisconsin, I was astonished at how often university leaders disparaged millennial students, referring to them repeatedly as whiners"
source: theconversation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 11, 2015
(Fark)
 
 
 
The gift that never quite gives you what you want. It's the Fark Weird News Quiz
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
On the eighth day of Christmas the police took from me / Eight dogs a-barking / Seven cats a-mewing / Six geese a-laying / Five. Other. Things / Four empty cages / Three plucky hens / A turtle or two / And a pheasant and a peacock
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Today's gun paranoia overreaction comes to us compliments of Lulu's Inn, a band roadie and a mic stand
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Berlin's subway is O.K. with you being weird
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Georgia school says teacher had no 'ill intent' asking Muslim student if she had a bomb in her backpack. Because it was a joke, see? "Do you have a bomb in your backpack? Hahahahahahahahahaha"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this high maintenance
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(All K-Pop)
 
 
 
Vigilant Customs agents at LAX foil dangerous Asian gang trying to spout their evil in the USA
source: allkpop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Belgium: "We may ban Scientology." Scientology: "Stupid Flanders"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Think of a Christmas song. No, the other one. Yeah, it's the most pointless of them all
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
"That's meth, I smoke it to stay awake, I'm an air traffic controller"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Chinese homebuyers shocked to find six-inch thick electrical cables running through their new apartments
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMTW Portland)
 
 
 
Hazmat responders called out to investigate white liquid leaking from truck cry, "It's spilt milk"
source: wmtw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Standard)
 
 
 
"Kin of jawan fighting at border await basic amenity in Thane." I just KNOW someone shot first
source: business-standard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
New York priest accused of embezzling money from his collection plate so he could use it to become a slave for Crist
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
You like weird GIFs? 'Cause this guy makes weird GIFs
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
UK couple that is taking that whole "till death do we part" thing WAY to seriously, just celebrated their 90th wedding anniversary. And while he's a respectable 110 years old, she is a scandalously young 103
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Christian blogger shares photos of his favorite weird nativity scenes. He was conflicted about including the one made out of tampons, but the one with baby Jesus drowning in a snowglobe and the one made of Spam dildos were just fine
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this group on wheels
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Realizing that "it flew here" was never going to be believed, horse breeder comes up with an even more implausible excuse for newborn piglet's presence in her stable
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Stock up on your whitening tooth paste and face scrubs as congress is poised to ban them
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WAPT Jackson)
 
 
 
I'm going to have to call you back. We've got cows. Cow trifecta now on the moooove
source: wapt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Generosity)
 
 
 
League of Elves has a donor willing to match $500 in donations this weekend. If you're still looking to help some underprivileged kids this season, now's the time
source: generosity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Well it was nice knowing you California, but now that the El Niño sh*t is about to hit the fan it's adiós amigos for you
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Myrtle Beach Online)
 
 
 
The clerks must've been Country music fans
source: myrtlebeachonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Murder can be so stressful. Time for a lap dance
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Chinese billionaire missing. He's probably in Gotham City gift wrapped for Commissioner Gordon
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Man who used social media to find women, steal their underwear is finally arrested for sniff and stiff
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
1) Dress up like terrorists. 2) For a Christmas skit. 3) Get expelled
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
The CDC (OMG SWINE FLU IS COMING WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE) doesn't understand (OMG BIRD FLU IS GONNA KILL US ALL) why so many people (OMG TOTES SERIOUS SPANISH FLU IS COMING) aren't getting flu shots
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press-Enterprise (So. Cal))
 
 
 
So, how serious a crime is it to smuggle 900 sea turtle eggs? I'll give you 50 years to think of the answer
source: pe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times Live South Africa)
 
 
 
The South African Air Force says that despite the cheetahs attacking people, having them around to control wildlife population on their property is a success
source: timeslive.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
DJ plays a record for the police raiding the night club he was working in. The Police have a problem with that
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada Journal)
 
 
 
Surgeon General's warning: fat people in ads may be detrimental to your health
source: canadajournal.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Port Huron Times Herald)
 
 
 
You never expect to see these words mashed together but here we are. Suicide by dog
source: thetimesherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Going forward, we must do our best and think outside the box to eliminate these fifty awful phrases used by our co-workers, who are just beating a dead horse at this point
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Woman after being convicted for shooting at a shoplifter in a crowded parking lot: "I learned my lesson that I will never help anybody again." Well I guess that's a start
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: A new look for Santa Claus
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Firefighters douse wrong plane with foam at Chinese airport. If only there were some kind of drill they could have had
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
She who smelt it dealt it, but claims that he heartfelt it
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
"I'm a rather brilliant designer, perhaps I could help you with that hump?" Tim Cook: "What hump?"
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Come pull up a stool and have a drink inside a little known hidden bar in Grand Central Terminal called the Campbell Apartment. It will transport you back to another era
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
This year's hajj stampede killed over 2400 - three times the official number. King Salman orders study, beheadings
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCRG)
 
 
 
"Brandon Wilson just can't stop hiding drugs in his rectum"
source: kcrg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(GeekWire)
 
 
 
Startup will give couples $10,000 for their wedding, but if they get divorced it must be paid back with interest. Discussions of this gamble may end a few engagements
source: geekwire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click2Houston)
 
 
 
Trees join war on Christmas, war may be over soon
source: click2houston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Researchers claim having a desk job could make you four times more likely to die early.Though, if you do have a desk job that probably sounds rather appealing
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
After four days of deliberation, Daniel Holtzclaw is guilty on 18 of the 36 counts
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 10, 2015
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Colorado just became a little bit more Kentucky
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
As if getting utterly trounced by Butler wasn't bad enough, the Citadel is now admitting thespians
source: college.usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Scientists discover new strain of bacteria that is resistant to ALL antibiotics. Even worse, it has the ability to infect other bacteria. WE'RE DOOMED
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Muslim advocacy group threatened by white powder
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these twirling beauties
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tacoma News Tribune)
 
 
 
But but it says right here - "The right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed" :(
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
From the article: Cold and tired, he finally decided to call 911, as at that point, he had a phone
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Snopes)
 
 
 
Daesh has an El Chapo to face. Update: Debunked by Snopes
source: snopes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Pope Francis: "Maybe we should leave Jews alone at this point"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Boston's MBTA takes its new driverless subway train for a ride, much to the surprise of the MBTA and the passengers on board
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MyRecipes)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: You've had a couple months to prepare.. Are you ready to throw down for game day gatherings? Don't drop the ball. Bring your A game recipes for tasty food to wash down with all those cases of Schlitz
source: myrecipes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
In a scenario that sounds like it was ripped from the forum section of a erotic gun enthusiasts periodical, the widow of 'American Sniper' Chris Kyle beats the NRA World Shooting Champ during a fundraiser for Chris Kyle's foundation
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: mechanical misfits
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
World cowers as Best Korea reveals that it has a fully-functioning water ba... ummm... "hydrogen bomb"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KAIT Jonesboro)
 
 
 
Armed nutjob at Arkansas State University threating to shoot someone or light himself on fire or something
source: kait8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
"Let's put rubber snakes out everywhere to convince people to catch wild pythons" was apparently something said at a planning session in Florida
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
What do you do with 25,000 liters of fake tequila? Apparently, the answer isn't "get a shiatload of limes"
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
By the time the gunfire had ceased, two were injured and the pizza was cold
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
Yale professor behind the Halloween email resigns to find a new home after finding Yale not a safe space
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
"Wild Krampus demons injure five teenagers." Well, there's a headline you don't see every day
source: thelocal.at   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
KKK is recruiting in Arab, AL. In other news there's a city called Arab in Alabama
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Anti-abortion protesters demonstrating against not yet built Planned Parenthood facility resort to bullying children at the school next door
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Taking up painting in retirement? Of course
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Shopkeeper in ISIS territory says that ISIS fighters are Axe murderers
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Recently-arrived Muslim family in Plano, TX discover that the locals apparently have gotten Krampusnacht confused with Kristallnacht
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Help Prudie, my family have become a bunch of gun nuts and I'm not ok with that. Prudie: Yes, guns are bad, avoid your family
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Why is ISIS afraid of girls?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London 24)
 
 
 
Man fries a dolphin live on air. Radio listeners find it hilarious
source: london24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
Arizona lifts its ban on hedgehogs. Ron Jeremy approves
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
China's killer smog causes 33-vehicle pile-up
source: au.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Putin discusses dropping nuclear bombs on Syria like the rest of us discuss the weather
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTNV Las Vegas)
 
 
 
Here's the church, here's the steeple, open the doors and traumatize all the people
source: ktnv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Upworthy)
 
 
 
Which states tax your ability to bleed from an orifice on a monthly basis? Hint: most of them
source: upworthy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MPR News)
 
 
 
Here's what happens when a principal tries to find a neutral way of saying "Son, your senior picture makes you look like an idiot"
source: blogs.mprnews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Photoshop these men with computers
source: 41.media.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
"Additionally, it is unknown whether his lack of clothing was a drug-related condition." And by "lack of clothing" they mean stealing a FedEx truck while naked. Unfortunately he wasn't able to drive a stick, so he ran away without the truck. Naked
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
To all those who have conducted evil acts of terrorism in the name of Islam, your time has come in the form of a fatwa from thousands of Muslim clerics. You have killed innocents and have disgraced the Muslim religion
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Lad Bible)
 
 
 
People were asked to sum up their first sexual experience with a GIF. Come for Michael J. Fox, stay for the hot girl playing with the door stop springy thingy
source: theladbible.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
The real reason Malaysia Airlines Flight MH370 went down was that it was a "zombie plane" on a fight to nowhere
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The first test-tube puppies are a mix of beagle, Labrador, cocker spaniel and adorable
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Man frustrated because his wedding certificate says he's married to another man, but in reality his new wife is just Canadian. "It's going to be a hassle dealing with immigration"
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Biloxi Sun Herald)
 
 
 
Truck carrying fire extinguishers catches fire
source: sunherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
 
 
School welcomes unvaccinated children. Guess what happens next?
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Former Miss Kansas charged with grizzly murder in Alaska
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hong Kong Free Press)
 
 
 
"There is no internet censorship in China, says China's top censor." Wait, what?
source: hongkongfp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 553: "Red Light, Green Light 2" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed December 09, 2015
(Guardian)
 
 
 
It's official: ending a text with a period makes you a monster. HERE COMES THE SCIENCE
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Can you solve this Christmas card brainteaser? If so you too can become a British spy
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Virginia approves parking fees for I-66
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
In this totes sincere article that presents what are 100 percent honestly held, actual opinions and should in no way be perceived as a troll designed to generate hits from outraged Star Wars fans, Slate writer explains why Han Solo isn't a sex symbol
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Crack)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lady breaking her mother's back
source: marienela.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Woman in her 70s falls into a fire pit and dies. Detectives describe this as a medium to rare occurrence
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda Report)
 
 
 
Man plays dead to avoid paying his debt to banks and so does his wife. If he had worn a condom, their trick would have worked, though
source: pravdareport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sports Illustrated)
 
 
 
Stop me if you've heard this one before: a governor, a rapper, an Irish tennis pro, a baseball manager, an Olympian, a sideline reporter and a performance coach walk into a Venn diagram together
source: si.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Mother complains to TV station after viewing extreme toast-on-egg violence
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washingtonian)
 
 
 
"Everything you need to know about pho" except how to pronounce pho
source: washingtonian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Not news: Small town rejects solar farm following public comments. Facepalm: "He said the solar farms would suck up all the energy from the sun and businesses would not come to Woodland"
source: roanoke-chowannewsherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Scientist says he's found woman under the Mona Lisa. That explains the smile
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Channel News Asia)
 
 
 
Magnitude 7.1 quake wakes up people on Ambon, leaves them disoriented
source: channelnewsasia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WebEcoist)
 
 
 
Artist tries sucking the smog out of Beijing's air with a shop vac, gets a brick for his trouble
source: webecoist.momtastic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
It's not easy being green, or hungry, or homeless
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
What happens when a family runs out of food stamps and can no longer put lobster and steak on the table? Is there a quick dial delivery function built into their Obamaphone?
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Winnipeg Sun)
 
 
 
You see some real jerk thieves around Christmas time. But have you ever seen the level of jerkiness it takes to steal 200 donated coats that were about to be handed out for free?
source: winnipegsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this photographer
source: 1.mshcdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Pizza, topped by pizza, topped by pizza. Need I say more?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washingtonian)
 
 
 
No one will be able to see up your skirt at our new office, Washington Post assures employees
source: washingtonian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Times)
 
 
 
Death specialists converge on Tokyo for nation's first Life Ending Industry Expo, demonstrate encoffinment techniques to panel of judges as peaceful, relaxing piano and guitar music plays
source: japantimes.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Not content to let Daesh grab all the headlines, Taliban attack Kandahar airport
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PCWorld)
 
 
 
Mozilla finally admits that nobody wants a Firefox OS in their smartphone
source: pcworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ArcaMax)
 
 
 
New Jersey gas station keeps price at $3.98, and people still buy gas there
source: arcamax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Florida man who sold $18M of fake Detroit homes finds himself in a new home
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
There is no Nazi fortress beneath Antarctica. There is, however, a mantle blowtorch that could make all the volcanoes erupt
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Imagine winning an award from the President... and then your pants fall down
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Edmonton Journal)
 
 
 
A woman tried to hire a hitman to kill a family of eight so she could acquire their land, which is about what you'd expect when your parents name you after a cocktail
source: edmontonjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Rear Admiral fired for trying to get others to admire his rear
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRDO Colorado Springs)
 
 
 
Paige Yore says her Walmart cashier story is, in fact, true, and furthermore, she's like Jesus
source: krdo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Want to drive a car that has seen more evil than you'll ever see in your lifetime? Well Nazism's S.S. chief Heinrich Himmler's WW II Wanderer W11/1 is going up on the auction block so you can enjoy a nice Sunday drive in it
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Doctor says that stripper who pounds her mound with a concrete block as part of her routine probably isn't doing her pelvis any favors
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times of Israel)
 
 
 
6,000-year-old artifact found in Israel may be the oldest smelted lead object. Scientists to determine which civilization was responsible for making it by relying on the age old test of "He who smelted it, dealted it"
source: timesofisrael.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSLS Virginia)
 
 
 
Ohio woman arrested for turning Trix while driving
source: wsls.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action A Go-Go)
 
 
 
The first two minutes of Star Wars: The Force Awakens "leaked" and it was awful. There was a great disturbance in the force not felt since the Phantom Menace incident of 1999
source: actionagogo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
First responders can now plug up gunshot wounds with this one simple trick
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Got a writing project planned? Have you started work on it? Good, keep doing so. We have much to discuss on this week's Fark Writer's Thread "Big news edition"
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this move in the dark
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News In English (Norway)
 
 
 
Norway's latest refugee dilemma: Whether to put the husbands of child brides in jail
source: newsinenglish.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fortune)
 
 
 
You sick Boston College students need not fear, it was probably norovirus in that Chipotle, not E. coli. So just return to bed, and curl up with your favorite bucket
source: fortune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
NewsFlash
 
Time's Person of the Year not Kim Davis
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
New college curriculum course on pizza teaches students to carry out pie to eight places
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Calgary Sun)
 
 
 
Bad Grandma. BAD GRANDMA
source: calgarysun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
College student gets a tatted-up older woman and her two teen sons to pose as his pregnant bride and stepsons for his Christmas cards so he can troll his family
source: gma.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Wired believes they may have discovered the person behind the Satoshi Nakamoto name who actually invented bitcoin
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Raccoon captured on train before the rest of his team was able to successfully obtain a security band, a quarnex battery, and for some reason, a prosthetic leg
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
It's probably already been settled that you are in fact a drunk, but the question is: what kind of drunk?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
It's the new "The Dress" - a photo causing heated internet arguments. Is it a man? Is it a woman? Are they wearing pants? Discuss
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
You really shouldn't use work computers to share racist and smutty emails with coworkers and colleagues, Mr. Pennsylvania Supreme Court Justice
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Advertising Age)
 
 
 
Crystal Pepsi Returns
source: adage.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Not news: lack of sleep can shorten your life. News: lazines can shorten your life. Fark: lack of sleep and laziness, combined, shorten life even more. Gentlemen, I think we should get our affairs in order
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS San Francisco)
 
 
 
North Face founder dies in Patagonia
source: sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 08, 2015
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Fwd: FWD: fwd: FWD: Heartwarming story of Walmart customer stepping up to help troubled cashier.... Walmart, Grinch: It's a hoax
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Fox News broadcasts segment to teach children how to disarm an active shooter. What could possibly go wrong?
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al-Monitor)
 
 
 
Turkish villagers enjoy a nice break from the usual hail of bullets and explosives
source: al-monitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Captain Obvious of New Jersey's State Commission of Investigation files a totally shocking report. The state's used car industry is all mobbed up and corrupt as hell
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Chinese researchers unveil car controlled by driver's mind. Overnight, car-breast collisions rise 10,000 percent
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGRZ Buffalo)
 
 
 
Nothing says "father and son quality time" like getting arrested for systematically stealing $41,000 in chicken wings
source: wgrz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
German firefighters have to rescue man from a) burning house, b) car wreck, c) penis ring
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this happy ball of fuzz
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
Your odds of winning money in the Illinois Lottery just greatly increased
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Five-year-old girl is the sole survivor of an arson attack that killed her parents and siblings. Now her extended family wants her holiday to be special with Christmas cards from all over. Address is in link
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Too shy to pee in public? No? Well, with this cloak you'll be too ashamed to pee in public
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Man caught on camera robbing Celebration Bank. Hopefully, they can recover the stolen Celebrations
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
You find a hole filled with spiders, so naturally you stick your hand in and drag them out
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Please note: make sure your cat has valid ID when mailing him an advent calendar
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this toothy walrus
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
F-35 shaped cookies cause uproar in Norway, partly over the militarization of a loved holiday, and partly because the recipe to bake them calls for burning hundreds of millions of dollars
source: thelocal.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Myrtle Beach Online)
 
 
 
If you had listened to mama when she told you not to run with chainsaws, you wouldn't be under arrest right now
source: myrtlebeachonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
As distracted driving citations drop, Washington DC to increase other traffic penalties, for um, safety
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Philladelphians tend to get a little pig-headed about Islam
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RTE Ireland)
 
 
 
Today's collection is in aid of our masked friend with the shotgun, Praise the Lord
source: rte.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Photo of nun's big rack not received well on Facebook
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Gay-themed pedestrian crossings removed in an Austrian city. In other news: They had gay-themed pedestrian crossings in Austria?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lehigh Valley Live)
 
 
 
Coolest drunk ever? This homeless drunk wanders into a house and watches TV with two kids that live there
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Lost planes. My three absolutely adorable planes have been missing since 7 December. Two are white, the third is off-white. All super friendly. Reward offered. Contact 579 2323 000
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Omaha's small population of anti-condom, anti-birth control, and anti-science parents continue to freak out over new sex education programs designed to keep children from becoming statistics
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
U.S. war veteran will receive the world's first penis transplant from Johns Hopkins University Hospital, and doctors hope it will be the first successful addadicktome
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
Surfer who recently punched a shark in the nose just saved another surfer from drowning. Chuck Norris fans, where is your god now? With video goodness
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Flight to Paris diverted due to "anonymous threat". Whose side are those guys on anyway?
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
School bus tracking app will make parents happy, ruin teen mornings
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Peter Robbins, who voiced Charlie Brown in the 'Peanuts' TV specials gets prison time for making criminal threats. Good grief
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(France 24)
 
 
 
Obama, Sunday: No evidence of a broader conspiracy in the San Bernardino probably postpartum depression and totally not terrorist shootings. Investigators: Hello there, 28 grand appearing in shooters' bank account
source: france24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man with curls
source: cbsnews2.cbsistatic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The latest hilarious YouTube prank trend? Faking your own murder. Just in time for Christmas, too
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Ok, Beijing. The first step is admitting you have a problem
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Employee of gun range says Syed Farook was just a "normal guy" when he came to practice. Are we talking "gun range normal" here or really normal?
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Russian tourism minister encourages Russians to shun sunny warm foreign beaches, instead to vacation the nice lovely beaches of northern Russia
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Remember that billion dollar Spanish shipwreck off Colombia? Spain says it's still theirs
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for banging her nephew hundreds of times, starting when he was in the hospital. Christmas dinner will be really awkward from now on
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Burglar on the run from police jumps in local lake to elude dogs and helicopters. What could possibly go wrong?
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
You thought Southerners had stupid grammar and corny accents? So do YouTube celebrities, who speak in what researchers call "YouTube Voice" as they delight their followers and aggravate everyone else with their carnival-barker tricks
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Discovery)
 
 
 
Archaeologists say that Stonehenge is made up of used pieces from monument constructed 500 years earlier in Wales
source: news.discovery.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC11 North Carolina)
 
 
 
Nineteen year-old dies feeling chipper
source: abc11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon December 07, 2015
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
It's that time of year again. How much should you tip the babysitter, the hair stylist, the mail carrier? 30% of Americans: "We don't believe in tipping"
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
$2.75 gets you a ride on a time machine back to the 1930s
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
After 74 years, photos emerge of the first sunken seaplanes of the Pearl Harbor attacks. Sometimes new technology really makes things clearer
source: motherboard.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arabian Business)
 
 
 
Pilot from Bahrain busted for having two feet in each of his socks
source: arabianbusiness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Headline: "Berlin-Egypt flight cut short by bomb threat". Still better outcome than "Berlin-Egypt flight cut short by bomb"
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Today, Fark reached a milestone
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Band-aid of the future includes meds, lights, sensors, semi conductor chips, free wi-fi, complimentary donuts and a cute nurse
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Department of Homeland Security to add new "intermediate terror threat" level to its color code alert system. Subby feels safer already
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time (Images))
 
 
 
Photoshop this territorial claim
source: timedotcom.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
When real life resembles GTA: Man steals ambulance as paramedics were unloading a patient, takes it on a joyride, and abandons it at a pharmacy that he breaks into
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
In other news, Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead, much to the surprise of this Spanish Wise Man
source: thelocal.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Not news: Front yard nativity scene. Fark: With zombies
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlas Obscura)
 
 
 
Hey, the South has invented a new grammar. A terrible, stupid grammar
source: atlasobscura.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
For the last time, Hanukkah is not Jewish Christmas
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
U.S. and China agree on joint methods for fighting cybercrime. Which mostly means when we're hacked we just ask China which of their people were responsible
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Austrian mafia still unclear on how laundering money works
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Police are not entirely sure how this man managed to cause a serious wreck with his tractor trailer after already having been run over by it, but suspicions currently lie on 'Florida'
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cold hike
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chronicle Herald)
 
 
 
Bad: Border agency seizes your undeclared cash. Worse: Threatening the officer who seized it. Fark: Border services get a warrant and find your automatic weapons, kevlar and 500 rounds. Difficulty: Canada
source: thechronicleherald.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ancient Origins)
 
 
 
New photos ¥ reveal giant ╜Easter Island » Statues ÿ are covered in ¢ mysterious symbols ║º
source: ancient-origins.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Naked man with open 12-pack arrested driving 110 MPH with 3 women in his car at 3 AM. I was told there'd be no meth
source: fox13news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Today's burglary pro tip: when committing your crime, you may not want to wear a shirt with your name on it
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
If you build a better mousetrap, the world might not beat a path to your door, but the mice will since mice are dumb
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Investigators believe that the wife may have been the driving force behind the San Bernardino massacre, have reportedly recovered a "Honey Do" jar filled with slips that said "murder infidels," "commit jihad" and, of course, "clean the gutters"
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stone Brewing)
 
 
 
How ballsy is Stone Brewing? They're opening a new brewery. In Germany
source: berlin.stonebrewing.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox5 DC)
 
 
 
Awww, mom, we never get to have smog-days like Beijing. Jeez
source: fox5dc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Alien UFO base found on Mars. Still no word on the Illudium Q-36 Space Modulator
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Europe)
 
 
 
Paris attacks, the aftermath: French government considers banning free Wi-Fi and Tor
source: neurope.eu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newark Advertiser (UK))
 
 
 
Pensioner flies skull and crossbones flag whenever he is in a bad mood
source: newarkadvertiser.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Attention, Internet: Anonymous has declared December 11th "Troll ISIS Day." So get your memes ready
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
The death penalty has become increasingly rarer for juries to level against convicted criminals, and courts are granting appeals, reducing death sentences to life imprisonments; only 27 people were executed this year. What happened?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Coalition aircraft "mistakenly" bombs Syrian military camp as both US and Russia now appear to be targeting everyone but ISIS
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
How do you know your marriage is pretty much over? When your wife discovers that you were having an affair. With a 91 year old. Because the police mentioned it. During an investigation of the woman's death from a sex game gone wrong
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
The men's tight market is wide open
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Las Vegas Review Journal)
 
 
 
Whole family packs heat in lawmaker's Christmas card
source: reviewjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
JJ Abrams admits he almost killed off the most powerful Sith lord in the Star Wars universe but decided to drop him from the film entirely
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times of Israel)
 
 
 
Mid-flight porn star cockpit party causes pilot... you already clicked, didn't you? (safe for work)
source: timesofisrael.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Stripper season returns, paying attention when your dog börks, and new Everest needs lhotse work: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 11/29 - 12/5
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Photoshop this biker gang
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Driver explains he was "distracted" while running over a bicyclist during hit-and-run. To be fair, you probably would be too
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Skywalker denied permission to fly with small trusted companion, presumably over fears of Tusken Raiders
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Debka Files)
 
 
 
Iraq to Turkey: You have 24 hours to pack yo' shiat and GTFO, or else we'll send in Baghdad Bob. And you don't want that
source: debka.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Police want more of Shotspotter, an audio surveillance system that reported three times as many gunshots as citizens did during trial period, and pinpointed shots' origins within 25 meters
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Even in Arizona you can't hunt down a thief who stole construction equipment from your car and shoot her in order to get your stuff back
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
People paid $199 to a KickStarter to develop a SmartCup that would identify what kind of liquid the user is drinking and display nutritional information about it are still waiting for their cups, still haven't realized they spent $200 on vaporware
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Missing Utah man identified as Jay Cutler's brother-in-law. Clearly, he saw today's Bears game
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Woman decides to flee the scene of an accident, but her car's SYNC Assist System gave the cops all her information in a matter of seconds
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Not too bright thieves attempt smash-and-grab jewelry store robbery at a Riverside mall not far from San Bernardino, prompting police response not seen since Jake and Elwood visited the Cook County Assessor's office
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Richmond.com)
 
 
 
Despite feeling remorse and returning them afterwards, you can still get into big trouble for stealing shoes. Ejaculating into them probably won't help your situation either
source: richmond.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Japanese spacecraft gets long-awaited second shot at love today
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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