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Sun September 13, 2015
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
If you are planning on attacking someone with a chair; watch your backswing
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TVNZ (New Zealand))
 
 
 
Bad: You lose your GoPro. Good: You get it back after two years. Awesome: It has video of its ascent to 98 thousand feet over the Grand Canyon
source: tvnz.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop this rock of ages
source: pre11.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
EPA: Oh, goody That mine blowout we caused in Colorado is the perfect excuse to stop cleaning up ten other polluting mines in Montana
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Midway thru flight from L.A. to Hawaii, airline realizes they're using a plane not certified to make long flights over water. OOPSIE
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Foodbeast)
 
 
 
Eight tips on how to grill the perfect steak. Look, no matter what, all a good steak needs is some A-1. It's how steak is done
source: foodbeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
How about some blue bacon to go with your green eggs and ham?
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Snopes)
 
 
 
Turns out that Slate story about Chinese drivers killing pedestrians is full of crap
source: snopes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this makeover
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
You might want to sit down for this, but it turns out that police in Pennsylvania would rather not have the public know their names after they murder a civilian
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Bank robber instructs teller to deposit money into his own account
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Twins who had twins are both pregnant again... with twins
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
One banana two banana three banana four, five banana six banana seven banana *croak*
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
All things pass with time, but a diamond is forever
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Police: "You say you own the BMW we impounded from you yesterday? And you're a banker? And President Obama follows you on Twitter? Okay lady, we're gonna need you to come over here"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
"Daddy, I want a nice expensive cake for my birthday party." Father: "Sure, how much?" Daughter: "$74 million." Father: "No problem"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hot Air)
 
 
 
DEA: Warrant? We don't need no stinkin' warrant to look into your private medical files to see what meds you take. Don't you know what the "D" stands for?
source: hotair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Now that Lansing, Michigan has solved all their other problems, they can focus on the things that really matter. Like debating if they should put lights on top of their orange construction barrels or not
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Florida Man accidentally texts sheriff's narcotics captain looking to score weed, captain texts back looking to score coke, and things go downhill from there
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Well that escalated quickly
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
Evidently for $1,000, you could help spray fake tanning lotion on Miss America candidates, except it was a scam. Or maybe not, because they didn't give me a big enough booth and my accountant died
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
It seems like the kickoff of the Halloween haunted house season begins earlier and earlier every year
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Latinos Post)
 
 
 
New study shows that "social media pressure" can cause anxiety, depression in teens. Then again, what doesn't cause anxiety and depression in teens? C'mon, that's what teens are
source: latinospost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Bacon is our God. Because bacon is real (with helpful photo of some bacon)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
Cause of house fire determined to be.... *shakes magic 8-ball*......self igniting tea towels
source: standard.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Adweek)
 
 
 
+O]:¬)
source: adweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Republic)
 
 
 
Minneapolis schools pull Utah-made books for being "culturally insensitive and unacceptable." In other words, they were about life in Utah
source: therepublic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
24-year-old narcissist in India quits his job as a hospital research assistant ... to become a record-breaking selfie taker. And people say Millennials have no passion
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fight
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hello! Magazine)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Thinking out loud
source: us.hellomagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Science)
 
 
 
Homeland Security finds out what everyone should have remembered from the 5th grade: Never pick a fight with a librarian
source: popsci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lacrosse Tribune)
 
 
 
Maybe teasing the cat with the laser on your gun isn't such a hot idea
source: lacrossetribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Naples Daily News)
 
 
 
Apparently, the longer you have to eat lunch, the healthier it is for you. Sure, the study was about schools, but subby still plans to take a three hour lunch break tomorrow. I mean, it's for health reasons, right?
source: naplesnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Kiss a girl on a schoolyard dare? That's assault charges
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sacred Artichoke)
 
 
 
Our host is feeling a bit under the weather so he won't be in the studio tonight. Instead here is an archived Livingston Stapler Company Presents show from April 21, 2012 for you to listen to
source: sacredartichoke.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat September 12, 2015
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Well hell it wouldn't be known as the crossroads of the world if you didn't have beautiful Chinese women going full qipao-wearing flash mob
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
In today's "What is wrong with you?" story, this woman is charged with having her kids living in a shipping crate inside an underground cave
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Pyrotechnic expert goes out with a bang
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Man previously arrested 13 times for impersonating a cop is arrested again... for impersonating a cop
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Arrested for minor traffic fines? Check. Denied medical care? Check. Found hanging in his cell? Check. Recovers and denies hanging himself? Holy shiat
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
CNN reports what Clayton Bigsby already knew 10 years ago
source: us.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
♫ Boys in the girls' room, girls in the men's room, it's Miraloma Elementary ♫
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Dear religious restaurant goers: A church pamphlet is not a tip
source: kitchenette.jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sniper
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
An investigation is underway after a prisoner is released 6 days early despite trying to tell prison bosses that he was not due to be released yet... and is then tracked down and offered $500 to return to finish his sentence
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Hey old guys, get a room
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Please note: store your explosives in an approved, safe location. 'In the kitchen, next to the stove' does not count
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
Rock art vandalized by college geology students. This is why we can't have gneiss things
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Roosevelts)
 
 
 
The coolest collection of perfectly timed military photos that you'll see today
source: rsvlts.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop the penguins of dawn
source: media2.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
'Vampire Squirrel' blamed for slaying deer
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
What a pisser
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Sorry, we don't have any treatment options for your violently insane daughter, but she can curl up in a corner of the ER next to the guy whose pants keep falling down
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Drunk and having sex in the middle of shopping center parking lot is no way to go through life, lady
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Police in Phoenix are being "helped" by armed conceal carry gun owners who are planning to "take down" the highway sniper plaguing the area. Fark: They refer to themselves as "guardian angels on steroids"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WOODTV Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
Please, grampa. I know you're only 67, but you've had three wrecks now. It's time to give up your license and sell the airplane
source: woodtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Dennis the Menace statue stolen from California playground back in 2006 found yesterday ... in Orlando
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Our long national nightmare is over as Sulley, the 100-pound tortoise who's been missing since Labor Day is finally back home. Sulley "seemed pretty tired and relieved when he was home," Roerig added
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Evidently Alabama does not like short shorts
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
At some point many decades ago, suburban America was told that it was a necessity to rake up every single dead leaf on the lawn before the first snowfall. Suburban America was told a lie
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Colorado trolls the rest of the country, makes pot tax-free on Wednesday
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Of all the things you expect to find in your koi pond an alligator is not one of them
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Popular hiking canyon remains closed because people keep trying to take selfies with bears
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
After 20 years, Disney World pulls plug on Osborne Family Spectacle of Lights. Ozzy to stare at Yule log instead
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Because our male teaching staff are a bunch of lecherous asshats, we are banning skirts and tight trousers. We have to draw the line somewhere
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wells Journal (UK))
 
 
 
When you're stealing pennies from a fountain, don't leave a trail for cops to follow
source: wellsjournal.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Politicians in cosplay
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Church sues strip club for holding the most awesome protests ever
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Garfield and Fluffy's excellent adventure. Just in time for Caturday
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
One hour? Two hours? How long is too long to wait in line for brunch? Subby won't wait more than 15 minutes for anything except sex or a liver transplant
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFist)
 
 
 
Thanks Millennials for lowering your living standards, now look at what you've done to San Francisco apartment living. These living standards shouldn't even be legal
source: sfist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Want to cure Alzheimer's Disease? Drink wine and eat chocolate
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOMU Columbia)
 
 
 
Police: "We knew 4 sex offenders lived near the school, but telling them to move would have screwed up our investigation"
source: komu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
According *boing* to scientists *boing* hopping *boing* for just *boing* two minutes *boing* a day can *boing* be good for *boing* your health *boing*
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri September 11, 2015
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's Friday, you're still sober and wearing pants. And now Fark is making you take the Weird News Quiz and you didn't study. Great. Just great
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bustle)
 
 
 
Study finds that married men who watch porn are more likely to be feminist. It's like 10,000 poons when all you need is your wife
source: bustle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Engineers create the largest artificial wave in the world. COWABUNGA, DUDE
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Woman beats man with frying pan, claims she has a cast-iron alibi
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
If we burned all of our fossil fuels, we'd melt Antarctica... so let's get on with it
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this wedding photo
source: cs628728.vk.me   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Video replay of James Blake's arrest clearly shows NYPD over the line
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Wrecka mecca crane, make a giant hole
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
It's come to this: Phoenix television stations are now doing stories showing people how to tell the difference between a rock hitting their windshield and a bullet
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKBN Youngstown)
 
 
 
To prevent extra-terrestrial attacks, man shines spotlights outside his foil-wrapped house at all hours of the day and night. So far it seems to be working
source: wkbn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
It's a feeling of relief to finally pay off your college parking tickets. Especially when they're from 1974
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cheddar Valley Gazette)
 
 
 
Dismaland parking attendant mistaken for millionaire mystery artist Banksy. Which is absurd. Only one can stay within the painted lines
source: cheddarvalleygazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this leap of faith
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
If you're dumb enough to trash a juice bar while trying to break in, you're dumb enough to give the security camera a nice close up while you try to trash that as well
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Six Iowa State students getting rabies shots after killing 23 (& counting) bats in their rental house. Bat teeth are so small they can bite without their victims feeling a thing
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Hungarian camerawoman says she 'regrets' (getting caught) kicking refugees
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSPA)
 
 
 
The most bizarre crime spree you will see today includes fondling strangers for money and using other people's toilet
source: wspa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
22% of Americans can't tell the difference between Neil Degrasse Tyson and Miss Cleo
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lehigh Valley Live)
 
 
 
Meals on Wheels volunteer accused of adding sausage to the menu
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
On Sept. 11 2001, an all-volunteer flotilla of ferries, tugs, fishing boats, and day sailors evacuated lower Manhattan in less than 12 hours. Here is the amazing video documentary of their story (narrated by Tom Hanks)
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(24/7 Wall Street)
 
 
 
Some people like a brand of car so much they never buy anything else. On the flip side of the coin are these car brands
source: 247wallst.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Bedbugs have evolved, now they take public transport
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
To truly end animal suffering, the most ethical choice is to kill wild predators
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
"It was [her] mental illness, coupled with the tremendous physical exertion... struggling with deputies that resulted in a cascade of lethal chemical reactions," definitely not all the Taser hits received while lying naked and restrained on the floor (disturbing video)
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Blind pit bull at adoption center has the chance for surgery to help him see for possibly the first time ever. Still needs a forever home, followup album
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Asshat family caught vandalizing National Forest trail, has been identified, fined. Behold, the power of the internet
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Florida man.........that's probably enough said
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
Modern-day insufferable hipsters decide to live life as if they were insufferable hipsters during the 19th century
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Detroit)
 
 
 
Michigan road crews clean up I-94 after semi-truck carrying chopped meat crashes. It's always good to have hamburger helpers
source: detroit.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPHO Phoenix)
 
 
 
Fire at Taser International headquarters injuries 7 people. Still a better Electro origin story than the one in the movies
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this dash for freedom
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Today is the 14th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks. On an otherwise quiet Tuesday morning, the major news sites had trouble keeping up with the traffic and were crashing. This is the original Fark thread from that day
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Sacramental September Shindig, 9/11-9/13
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Rainbow invades airspace of World Trade Center on eve of 9/11. Fighter jets immediately launched
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Last known surviving 9/11 rescue dog returns to New York City, is glad it's no longer dusty in here
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
In this politically correct world you now have to apologize for calling someone a Luddite
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Judge orders DA to court to explain why, after 3 years, he has not filed charges against a sheriff's deputy who slammed a shackled defendant into a wall for no reason, in front of another judge. Warning: auto-playing video, mute your speakers
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
Pope Francis is on a new crusade to make Catholicism relevant again
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
The favored food of college students isn't ramen, hoagies, or pizza; it's frogurt
source: college.usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Alabama's new education standards praised for being pro-science
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu September 10, 2015
(KFVS 12)
 
 
 
Never take driving advice from a man with a bottle of vodka between his legs--especially if you're only nine years old
source: kfvs12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Job Interviewer: "Pace University grad, very nice. Captain of the football team, very nice indeed. Let me just do a quick Google search here.... Holy hell. Is that you draped in a Confederate flag giving a Nazi salute?"
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
So, how much money was Pablo Escobar making at his peak? He lost several BILLION a year just to rats eating stored money
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Just like Sarah Cynthia Sylvia Stout, this guy would not take the garbage out
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 3 Las Vegas)
 
 
 
Family would rather lose patch of useless desert than sell it for a measly $5 million
source: news3lv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this happy couple
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Old Arabic proverb: the enemy of my enemy is my friend. The latest enemy of ISIS is now al Qaeda, which makes for a totes awkward BFF
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Guy busted for attacking girlfriend during 4 AM argument "about eating Doritos" looks like he knows something about the munchies
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
Estranged son attempts to bury the hatchet with his parents, sheriff's deputies
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCRA 3 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Mysterious chunk of ice crashes through home, leaves owner complaining about giant ice-hole
source: kcra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Miss Vermont plans to cause "an eruption of foam shooting skyward" during the talent portion of tonight's Miss America pageant
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
The A-10 Warthog video the Air Force doesn't want you to see. Keep calm and BRRRRRRT on
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Michigan golfer dies of 20 bee stings and being 34 over par
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(What's Cooking, America)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Cheese... it's not just for Fark Threads. Which cheeses do you like to use for cooking and which do you just enjoy as a snack?
source: whatscookingamerica.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Little girl crawls inside and gets trapped in an arcade game claw machine. Firefighters rush to the scene after getting change for a $20 bill
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this nerd rage
source: media.zenfs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(American News X)
 
 
 
Kim Davis's attorney announced the jail time made her understand her mistakes and she is going to do her job from now on. Just kidding, she will attempt to invalidate all marriage licenses given out in her absence and pursue criminal penalties
source: americannewsx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Good News Network)
 
 
 
Ever seen an entire town covered from street to rooftop with a 215,000 square-foot rainbow? Well, now you have
source: goodnewsnetwork.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PurchaseGreen)
 
 
 
California senate wants more people to have great-looking, plastic implants
source: purchasegreen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox9 Minneapolis)
 
 
 
The wheels on the wrong school bus go round and round for four hours
source: fox9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Murder reconstruction on TV has viewers naming suspect. Police quickly detain and take DNA from actor who played murderer in reconstruction
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPHO Phoenix)
 
 
 
I-10 freeway sniper still at large in Phoenix area. Fortunately he's a terrible shot, so have a pleasant commute
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Myrtle Beach Online)
 
 
 
"A gun in his waistband and marijuana in his truck" Police report or Country music lyric?
source: myrtlebeachonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KBOI2 Boise)
 
 
 
Under chin injection to dissolve neck fat rapidly becoming popular. It also causes nerve damage to go along with the brain damage you have for wanting to inject ACID INTO YOUR NECK
source: kboi2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
The stupid. It hurts. Especially if you're a Sikh being beaten on the head by someone calling you "Bin Laden"
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
US Intelligence on ISIS: "They are not within 100 miles of Baghdad. We have destroyed their shovels. We have burned them all with our shoes"
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
If your 14 year-old little brother uses your favorite M4 assault rifle to kill a classmate and himself, just let it go. It's gone
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Bay Area)
 
 
 
It's cheaper to rent a castle in France than an apartment in San Francisco
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Sometimes, the long con doesn't pay out. Sometimes you end up stuffing a suggestion box full of cat pictures and never get the sweet reward of mockery
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Twelve year old is no Einstein...she's smarter
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBUR Boston)
 
 
 
"Very interesting" says governor regarding a proposal to *finally* connect North and South. Boston, that is
source: wbur.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WISHTV)
 
 
 
It turns out that identity thieves just install card swipers on gas pumps now
source: wishtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Tesla founder Elon Musk says that we can colonize Mars. Problem: the temperature of Mars needs to be increased. Musk's solution: drop nukes on Mars
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Reason #67259 that it's bad to urinate in public: you never know when a Levantine viper will mistake your penis for a threat
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sunderland Echo)
 
 
 
Meet Bertie, the Usain Bolt of the tortoise world...and that's official
source: sunderlandecho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
New Zealand bans its first book in 22 years, which is disappointing news for the three people who still buy books
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Here's a story about a headless chicken that lived for 18 months. No, it is not a euphemism for the 2016 presidential election. But
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
We've been studying Rome for centuries, so you'd think everything of consequence has already been discovered. Apparently, that's not the case at all
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Man calls up three banks and threatens to rob them. Police on lookout for I. P. Freely, Hugh Jass, Amanda Hugginkiss
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global Post)
 
 
 
Marvel Cinematic Universe has so far revealed 4 of the 6 Infinity Stones, the other 2 are probably in Indonesia
source: globalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Virginia denying licenses for flags
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these star-struck Canadian tourists in Coney Island, 1952
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Bones found in South African cave reveal new human relative that will insist on coming to the holidays but fail to bring a covered dish and act as if he didn't realize he had to bring a dish to pass
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Yup, lockpickers managed to 3-D print luggage keys from the photo leaked by the TSA of all the keys on a keyring
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Paste Magazine)
 
 
 
"I'm a better parent when I'm drinking. I'm more patient, and some situations require more patience "
source: pastemagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Since we're all going to die because the world is heating up, here's a map to tell when you're most likely to be cooked
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Sheer pandamonium broke out
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Got your nose
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Any good parent knows the proper amount of cocaine to give their child on his or her 18th birthday
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Subby's nomination for Mugshot of the Week goes to this man, who decided that his idea of having a blast is throwing lit firecrackers into a crowd
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Retired Anaheim drama teacher accused of molesting students, possessing child porn, and having a face that will haunt your dreams to the very depths of hell
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 10 Phoenix)
 
 
 
Armed civilians to patrol stretch of Interstate 10 in Phoenix where multiple shootings took place. What could possibly go wrong?
source: fox10phoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Remember the time Donald Trump's father was arrested with fellow KKK members after they attacked police officer? Pepperidge Farm does
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Protip: If you're gonna do a brain tissue transplant, avoid using brain tissue from a donor who had Alzheimer's
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBAY Green Bay)
 
 
 
Vietnam Vet who was exposed to Agent Orange and previously had a stroke, who now currently has stage 4 lung cancer has been denied his pain pills because he tested positive for marijuana. Murica. Fark yeah
source: wbay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The reason it costs $14,000 to treat a snakebite with $14 medicine [USA]
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Sheriff Joe Arpaio comes to the rescue of a poor, neglected ass
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 540: "Farktography Classic: Red 2" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed September 09, 2015
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Texas woman manages to reinvent the term "vaginal discharge"
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Retired tennis star James Blake receives first grand slam courtesy of NYPD
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Times)
 
 
 
New $450,000 Range Rover Sentinel SUV can withstand armor piercing bullets and hand grenades, making your drive through Camden, New Jersey relatively worry free
source: techtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Bet you can't guess the most disgusting part of an airplane
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this forlorn boy
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(12News Phoenix)
 
 
 
Fire crews claim victory over three-alarm fire full of explosions and explosion accessories
source: 12news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
When a CEO steps down as quickly as United's Jeff Smisek, he either farked a subordinate or federal criminal investigators are closing in. Fortunately for Mrs. Smisek there is no nubile intern involved. Unfortunately for stock holders, however...
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bleacher Report)
 
 
 
Surfer breaks neck in four places. Dude, why did you even go to the other three?
source: bleacherreport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
National Geographic to change format to science fiction
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for attacking an officer of the law with a bayonet. This is not a repeat from 1776
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Hay, that bale is about to fall right on me
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Would you pay $10,000 for whale puke?
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABL13 Houston)
 
 
 
Allowing 14 year olds to anonymously submit questions live on the big screen during school assembly goes about as weHITLER WAS AN OK GUY
source: abc13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
That recently re-discovered "Nazi gold train" that has been making news lately may only be stuffed to the gills with artwork, diamonds and precious gems, its discoverers warn
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
PSA: Remember, when you masturbate, you masturbate with Ebola
source: in.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
University of Pennsylvania psychotherapist says "the Internet is like your brain on porn." I must do more research on the subject
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this expose
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCRG)
 
 
 
Never bring a machete to a forklift fight
source: kcrg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Study shows half of all Americans are diabetic or pre-diabetic. The other half were too busy stuffing their faces with pizza, fried chicken, and Oreos to participate
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Scratch and sniff rings, because who doesn't want to be seen scratching at and sniffing their knuckles?
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
Desperate Yemeni refugees fleeing to the safety, stability, and prosperity of Somalia
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
...because there is no better place to huff compressed air than under a clothing rack at Walmart
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBIR Knoxville)
 
 
 
Tennessee Supreme Court will reconsider whether touching a white line on the road justifies a pretext stop
source: wbir.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC11 North Carolina)
 
 
 
With temperatures in the 90s, New Jersey school district declares a snow day
source: abc11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Congratulations on the sex"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WISN Milwaukee)
 
 
 
Month-old girl does something most college kids never achieve - hits a 0.294 on the blood alcohol meter. #ThanksMom
source: wisn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Sand people taking potshots at motorists on Arizona stretch of I-10
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
World's Largest Biker Bar is now World's Largest Pile of Ash
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Ever since Uncle Sam started lending money to college students, college tuition has skyrocketed. Coincidence?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live Science)
 
 
 
The Association of Time Travellers has postponed this week's meeting to yesterday
source: livescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
12pm: 10,000 free tickets to see the Pope at Independence Hall become available online. 12:02pm: All tickets are gone. 12:05pm: Tickets now available on Craigslist for $500
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
Protip: If you are going to burn down an apartment building, try not to get caught on the surveillance video carrying a gas can
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPBF West Palm Beach)
 
 
 
Teacher traded lollipops for massages. This is not a euphemism
source: wpbf.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tight formation
source: media.zenfs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
United States is slow to accept refugees from Syria, because that whole "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free" thing is not so much in practice anymore
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Writer who does not identify with male or female gender removes breasts and uterus. "'It felt bizarre knowing that the last interaction with my breasts anyone would have was a middle-aged manly surgeon drawing on me"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
'Liz-a-beth, is my Queen. E-liz-a-beth, E-liz-a-beth. 'Liz-a-beth, 'Liz-a-beth
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Responsible gun owner grabs his rifle and successfully detains a prowler on his property until the authorities could arrest him. Just kidding. He got into a scuffle with the prowler and accidentally shot himself in the leg
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Stop. Hammer crime
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Although it's much more fun to wrap yourself up in faux outrage, in reality there's a very good reason why all the refugees in Europe all have smart phones and selfie sticks
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Don't tell mom the babysitter shot me
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
911: "What's your emergency?" Woman: "There's a black widow spider in my grapes" 911: "Just kill it"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Now that's just a cruel thing to do to your cheating boyfriend; selling his "Batmobile" on Craigslist as retribution for his infidelity. CRUEL
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
What catches fire in Vegas stays in Vegas
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Leicester Mercury)
 
 
 
Thieves strip parts from police anti-theft bike. It's the cycle of life
source: leicestermercury.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Carnival cruise ship suffers engine fire, stranding 4,500 passengers and crew in the U.S. Virgin Islands. The bigger news is that there were actually that many people willing to board a Carnival cruise ship
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Scientists plan to reanimate a 30,000-year-old giant virus that has been found preserved in the frozen wastelands of Siberia, because why not?
source: america.aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPBF West Palm Beach)
 
 
 
Man named King busted at Burger King for playing with his whopper (w/ awesome mugshot)
source: wpbf.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
These guys are so grounded
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue September 08, 2015
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Tower, this is Piper Cherokee requesting a flyby
source: foxtrotalpha.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Fox Montana)
 
 
 
Dude, hobo spider is not the preferred nomenclature. Migratory spider, please
source: abcfoxmontana.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Australian survives Australia, gets killed by nature in Norway
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFist)
 
 
 
Apparently this chicken crossed San Francisco's Bay Bridge to get to live her days out at a East Oakland school and be renamed after female freedom fighter Alice Paul
source: sfist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
What's safer than alcohol and prescription drugs for your anxiety and depression? No man, not that. This
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Great news about Fark's mobile site
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sand jumper
source: l3.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Lesbos groaning under the weight of immigrants
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Signal)
 
 
 
Millennials are moving in to New Orleans, which can only mean gluten-free artisanal beignets, free trade chicory coffee and tofu gumbo can't be too far behind
source: dailysignal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"Jeez, my head. What the heck did I do last night?" "Well, you designed an aircraft"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Los Angeles county has sentenced more people to death than the five most execution-happy Southern states
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WorldWide Weird News)
 
 
 
Inmate offers to donate bone marrow to the judge who sentenced him to 25 years in prison, says going to jail saved him and helped turn his life around
source: worldwideweirdnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRON 4)
 
 
 
Two tons of cocaine disguised as printer ink seized, police note the low declared value tipped them off
source: kron4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
.. - .- .-.. .. .- -. / -.-. .... . ... ... / .--. .-.. .- -.-- . .-. / -.-. .- ..- --. .... - / ..- ... .. -. --. / -- --- .-. ... . / -.-. --- -.. . / - --- / -.-. .... . .- - / -.. ..- .-. .. -. --. / - --- ..- .-. -. .- -- . -. - .-.-.-
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
That Brady kid probably did it
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Therakyat Post)
 
 
 
Two 5 year olds tunnel out of kindergarten playground and make their way to car dealer to buy a new Jaguar. And it would've worked too, if it wasn't for those meddling adults
source: therakyatpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"Sorry I missed our lunch meeting, I went to the Emergency Room because I accidentally shot myself with a staple gun," and other interesting out-of-office messages
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Waffle House serves up one billionth waffle. How many of these did YOU consume?
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bing)
 
 
 
Photoshop the ridiculously cool and/or dangerous playground equipment you know you really, really, really, really wanted when you were about 10 years old
source: bing.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
"The 9th hole here is a par 4 with a few sand traps and a runaway car"
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cheddar Valley Gazette)
 
 
 
I now pronounce you husband and wife. Once I've taken this selfie
source: cheddarvalleygazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
It's probably one in a million that you get hit by lightning, probably one in two million that your bra saves your life
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South China Morning Post)
 
 
 
North and South Korea agree to hold a reunion for families separated by Korean war. North Korean relative looking forward to seeing family, food
source: scmp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Let us journey, you and I, to the rice paddies of Wisconsin
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Gabriel Valley Tribune)
 
 
 
If you decide you don't want to drive after drinking too much, it's rather important to stop the vehicle first
source: sgvtribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
1815: Watch out for cattle rustlers. 2015: Watch out for beehive rustlers
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
School run. Ukrainian edition
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Ejected from bar, Florida man throws bike in water, jumps in, taunts bar patrons, swims to another bar
source: offthebeat.blogs.tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
What's that, Timmy? Lassie is stuck in a well? And now you are too?
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Therakyat Post)
 
 
 
Who put drugs in our drugs?
source: therakyatpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Coconuts)
 
 
 
Bangkok cops bust meth-taking abbots and monks in temple after being tipped off by dealers and incensed temple neighbors
source: bangkok.coconuts.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
If you keep pushing your wives off cliffs, people may stop believing they just fell
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ancient Origins)
 
 
 
Chinese Government: We are the ones who decide when the Dalai Lama will reincarnate, and what he will reincarnate to
source: ancient-origins.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Ordinarily, pizza and beer go very well together. But when the state police have to take down the lady driving the beer truck because she wants to shoot the pizza delivery dude, well. . . that's a horse of a different color
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Mystery solved: Just why the hell don't you ever see baby pigeons?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Italy's highest court: "Yeah, ok, we admit that our police and prosecutors offices are a bunch of incompetent idiots, happy now?"
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Walter Palmer's dental surgery re-opened in Minneapolis today, and it has a lovely new rug
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Not News: Police issue citation for busted windshield. Fark: As it was in the process of getting fixed
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Searchers have found even more body parts in Garfield Park, believe separatists are at work
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Mirror)
 
 
 
Mother: It's so hard shopping here with my disabled child. Supermarket: No problem. We've designed you a new shopping cart
source: irishmirror.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yonhap News (Korea))
 
 
 
North Korea's beloved all-girl band goes missing and another almost identical band takes its place. Who does Kim Jong Un think he is, Prince?
source: english.yonhapnews.co.kr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Navy okays plan to send 5,000 marines to Guam. Guam readies counterbalance
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SafeBee)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Carpal tunnel syndrome from handwriting too many letters. New extremity injury: Cubital tunnel syndrome from talking on a cell phone too long
source: safebee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Police urge students to 'party with caution' during frosh week. You could face a $65 fine for puking on a cash register, jail for selling roommates iPad, and you don't want to know what could happen if you lick a baked good slated for sale
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
China to create "public square dancing management mechanism" to combat unruly old ladies who like to dance
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
This probably has nothing to do with an escaped alien plague. Probably
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(East Bay Express)
 
 
 
Roundup, like nearly every other substance known to man, is now known by the State of California to cause cancer
source: eastbayexpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
An alarm clock in your airline luggage is usually not a problem ... unless it evacuates an entire major airport
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Pope Francis lightens up Catholic rules on remarriage
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Life's really difficult when my knees are this sharp
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cheddar Valley Gazette)
 
 
 
When you're hiding behind a bush ready to pounce on a lone woman, make sure it isn't a kickboxer capable of knocking you out with her thighs
source: cheddarvalleygazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Cronic Guy)
 
 
 
Researchers SHOCKED to find E-cigarettes being used by teens to 'vape' marijuana. Subby looks at his apple, toilet paper core, two-liter bottle, and sighs
source: latinoshealth.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Anti-Semitic graffiti will remain on the Queen's Vagina
source: news.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Porn app took secret photos of users. This should be just like a Fark Party only in picture format
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WISHTV)
 
 
 
"There is a pretty obvious way to reduce gun violence"
source: wishtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Weekly)
 
 
 
Meet the Meatheads: they will pack and move your stuff for free if you need to escape an abusive relationship
source: laweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop the new fashion trend
source: cbsnews2.cbsistatic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
I scream you scream we all scream outside the ice cream shop
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Polar bears are the honey badgers of climate change
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
Now that the Oregon State Police have stopped digging up marijuana plants, the local deer have taken over
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Luis Obispo Tribune)
 
 
 
7-year-old dog with fatal condition given his own bucket list by his humans, including paddle boarding in the ocean, visiting Lassie's star in Hollywood, and a Fido In & Out Burger. That's a good (sniff) doggie
source: sanluisobispo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
If you were planning to get bit by a snake during the next two years, don't
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon September 07, 2015
(Public Radio International)
 
 
 
We can either confirm or deny that the CIA's most famous ship is going to the scrapyard
source: pri.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
The last union coal mine in Kentucky has finally closed. September 5 goes into the history books as carbon dated
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Subby, 99, dead of natural causes
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Mom brings three-year-old to doctor with a cut on his eye. Receptionist: "I got this"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man on a bucket list mission
source: cbsnews2.cbsistatic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Consider but decide against joining ISIS? That'll be 30 years in prison
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
Sheep drive leaves many satisfied smiles behind
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 46 Atlanta)
 
 
 
They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And they absolutely will not stop, ever, until you use a sink drain stopper
source: cbs46.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sign
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
It takes a lot of talent to hit two people with a foul ball, but nevertheless it happened to this elderly couple watching a Marlins game. At least something got hit that day
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
The bridges are in such bad shape in Missouri, transportation officials are recommending commuters ford the river to get to work
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Drone kills two British men in "self defense." Apparently the drone feared for its life
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Kim Davis: My incarceration is illegal because I was not specifically told that a federal judge can put you in the pokey for disobeying him. They also didn't specifically tell me water could make you wet
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Go home car, you're drunk
source: au.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
In Chicago, it's not "Don't cry over spilled milk," it's "Don't murder someone over spilled beer"
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
 
 
Australians don't just have convict DNA, they might also have a little Confederate DNA
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Old first day of school warning: "Do not accept rides or candy from this man." New first day of school warning: "Do not accept bus rides or candy from this man"
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Sesame Street abandons all semblance of an educational show and goes straight to propaganda with new puppet: Donald Grump
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The government of China issues a stern warning about the dark side. Of mooncakes
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Women in Hong Kong embark on a light diet
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Having trouble sleeping? Pay two bills and call me in the morning
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vermont Public Radio)
 
 
 
Finally a public radio story for the rest of us: Vermont's top speed trap officer explains how he does it
source: digital.vpr.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Waitress gets a 6% tip on a $500 bill. Wait, correction ... make that a 600% tip on a $500 bill
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
That's not a Stonehenge. THIS is a Stonehenge
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Germany is going to shell out $6.6 billion to pay for all those refugees seeking a better life outside Syria
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Yankees complete their march through Atlanta unimpeded, Kermit in yet another relationship that isn't kosher, and a third eye and/or testicle on the forehead: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 8/30 - 9/5
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Some young women would give their right arms to be models. Meet Rebekah Marine who didn't have a choice
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mission
source: media.zenfs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Taunton Gazette)
 
 
 
Man rows his 817-pound pumpkin right into the Guinness world book of record
source: tauntongazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Mirror)
 
 
 
Horse's ass shoves 28 packages of horse up his ass
source: irishmirror.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Want to know why cyclists are so embraced in Copenhagen? It's because Copenhagen cyclists actually know how to stop for a red light
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Cops search a man's car and find marijuana based on the grounds that he was driving barefoot
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cheddar Valley Gazette)
 
 
 
Man sells 47 bottles of vodka to nightclub. Turns out to be antifreeze. That's cold, man
source: cheddarvalleygazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Contestants in the Miss Flora-Bama 2015 Labor Day Weekend Bikini Contest are doing their best to help make sure the South rises again
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Coconuts)
 
 
 
♫ Oh, what a feeling ♫ Feces falling from the ceiling ♫
source: bangkok.coconuts.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
The KKK just called to tell you you're being a racist prick
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Mirror)
 
 
 
Finally, male contraceptive to be available within three years. *clicks link* NOPE
source: irishmirror.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Lion-killing Minnesota dentist comes out of hiding, plans to return to work
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Urine trouble if you think it's a good idea to relieve yourself between subway cars
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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