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Sun July 12, 2015
(SFGate)
 
 
 
The chemtrails people were right all along. Difficulty: 1950s
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Gambler who tipped staff after big win returns two weeks later to demand money back after losing streak. That's not how it works
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Special Broadcasting Service)
 
 
 
Naturopathic doctor arrested after putting baby on liquid diet for eczema
source: sbs.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Jesus foils home invasion robbery
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
This week's episode of "This is an outrage" is brought to you by the Sioux and Devils Tower
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier-Journal)
 
 
 
Founder of LebowskiFest arrested at bowling alley on possession of marijuana charges and failing to abide
source: courier-journal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Russian man to undergo world's first head transplant. Or Russian man to undergo world's first body transplant. I forget which
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Pennsylvania man flies to Arizona intent on having carnal relations with a horse. Then it gets weird
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(This Is Local London)
 
 
 
London Met Police strongly urge that you should not swing from the rafters on any London Bridge. (It may come down is a possible reason)
source: thisislocallondon.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Missoulian)
 
 
 
According to the U.S. Forest Service, the best way to deal with a deer while driving is to ram it
source: missoulian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Two armed robbers brought a 1 year-old with them on their crimes, and not even on Take Your Child to Work Day
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this stump
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(American Mirror)
 
 
 
Man calls police because he is offended by material being sold in flea market, forgetting that most material in a flea market is offensive
source: theamericanmirror.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tucson.com)
 
 
 
Arizona man serving 15 years in prison is singlehandedly responsible for 78% of the Tucson federal court's civil caseload; a federal judge said he has "abused the legal process egregiously and often"
source: tucson.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
A gang of teens on bicycles are terrorizing Brooklyn by groping women. As if we do not already have enough reason to dislike bicyclists. And teens
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tahoe Daily Tribune)
 
 
 
Most badass stagecoach driver of all time discovered at death to be a woman. She smoked, drank, and loved whips and horsies
source: tahoedailytribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Sheriffs considering making sex offenders pay annual fee to defray costs of monitoring them since it's so hard to track jobless, homeless pariahs according to state laws
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Anyone got an extra $96 billion? Greece would totally like to borrow it
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Just because Baby needs new pair of shoes doesn't mean you can sell drugs from child's stroller, Mom
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
Shrimpers pull giant invasive creature from dark waters of St. Johns River. What will they do? "Saturday night when we close, we're going to eat it"
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this guitar guy
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
If you're going to mastermind a home invasion robbery, try to pick someone other than your boss
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Which of the following will *not* make your child's teeth rot: A.) Sugary sodas; B.) Fruit juice; C.) Dried fruit; or D.) None of the above? If you answered C, we have a surprise for you
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for assaulting the mayor of Baltimore with the deadly solvent dihydrogen-monoxide
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Female teachers receiving light sentences for sex with students. New hotness: Brunette female teachers receiving harsh sentences for sex with students
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Don't you hate waking up to find a small plane crashed in your front yard?
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Grab the sauce and the cole slaw, we gotta lot of smoked meat in Miami
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"Beach yoga man injured when his ball explodes"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Nation's capital is turning parking spots along busy streets into fun 6' x 12' parks where kids can play. What could possibly go wrong?
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Never bring your rifle to a cat fight, even if there are 15 of them running amok
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
LAPD investigating video of car driving backwards for miles. Only clue is a male voice screaming, "FEEEERRRRIIIIIISSSSSSS"
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Short answer: Yes. Long answer: Yeeeeeeeesssss
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSMV Nashville)
 
 
 
Our long national nightmare is finally over as Zimm the escaped monkey has been recaptured and returned to his enclosure at the Memphis Zoo
source: wsmv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Crawley News)
 
 
 
You've assaulted a police officer and stolen a pork pie and you're in the dock. How to escape? Why, the old broken ankle ploy of course. Wait until you're being taken to the cells and spring out of your wheelchair
source: crawleynews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Detroit)
 
 
 
Detroit Police Department now suffering its worst manpower shortage in nearly a century. Which is no big deal since residents agree there's nothing left for anyone to actually want to steal
source: detroit.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(When On Earth)
 
 
 
In Sweden you have the inalienable right to roam where you want, there is a festival for everything, and the people there take coffee breaks to a whole new level
source: whenonearth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
A recent outbreak of salmonella that affected nearly 200 people has been partly attributed to people "kissing and cuddling live poultry"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
UK urges British tourists to leave Tunisia, saying terrorist attacks are "highly likely." Although it is going to be hard to talk any common sense into anyone who has picked Tunisia as their vacation destination
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these business peeps
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Engadget)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Your first computer
source: engadget.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Mexican drug lord Joaquin "El Chapo" Guzman, former head of the Sinaloa Cartel, has escaped from a maximum security prison. Fark: for the second time
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Man arrested after stealing a sword from Renaissance Festival jousters. Not surprisingly alcohol was involved
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Santa Rosa Press Democrat)
 
 
 
You're an inmate in a California prison and you're suspected of swallowing something illegal -- welcome to the "potty watch" where they'll know when you go
source: pressdemocrat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
New York unveils new program to track troublesome cops; the program is named ALT + F4
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Pope Francis says the new Golden Calf, the false idol worshiped by the damned, is wealth
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
"It's pretty disturbing because, I for one, don't want to think there's an ice cream man driving around drunk. Nobody wants any DUI ice cream"
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Fox Brewery to celebrate cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems by releasing Duff beer
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fort Wayne Journal Gazette)
 
 
 
Some 20 to 30 drivers have a colorful story to tell after the hose on a highway paint-striping truck ruptures
source: journalgazette.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming up at the top of the hour after the smooth jazz it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents, 3 hours of music hosted live by a farker in rainy Juneau, Alaska. LGT stream (9PM AKDT/10PM PT)
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat July 11, 2015
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Harland Sanders was a foul-mouthed, violent, horny old coot, but he was a hard worker and gave most of his money away to the "Salvational Army"
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ozy)
 
 
 
How one Japanese chemist with a taste for whisky made it possible for all of us to make it Suntory time
source: ozy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
Lake Michigan water levels are rising at an alarming rate. Is now the time to panic? I was told that the time to panic was when it was falling at an alarming rate. Will someone please clarify when the time to panic is?
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Bearded Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this beard-sterile environment
source: medventure.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Dallas/Ft. Worth)
 
 
 
Digital kidnapping is now a thing
source: dfw.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
If you bought a lottery ticket in a Brooklyn deli on July 24, you may want to check the numbers
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC11 North Carolina)
 
 
 
I'm so pot for teacher
source: abc11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Japan could teach the West a thing or two about sleeping on the job, aka urban napping. "If carried out correctly an inemuri is an honourable kind of minor failure, like having no time to eat lunch, or 200 unanswered emails"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
46-year-old woman injures her hand while playing musical chairs, re-injures it weeks later while helping someone move, so of course the state of Arkansas owes her $75,000
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Maclean's)
 
 
 
Photoshop this televised address
source: macleans.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
It's all fun and games 'til you start swinging a sword at people
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
In today's annual repeat: four gored in Pamplona bull run
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Apparently, sharks have learned to make IEDs
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
"Yes, hello, 911? I'd like to report some suspicious teenagers selling $10 boxes of candy for an undisclosed nonprofit"
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Dallas/Ft. Worth)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when they knock at your door, refuse to leave you alone, park in front of your house until you submit to their demands? Census workers in Dallas refuse "no comment"
source: dfw.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
The most common cause of car accidents in Canada is still "hit by møøse"
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Three years of probation and 100 hours of community service seems about right for stealing four guns from a police evidence room and trying to sell one, if you're a sheriff's deputy
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Passengers now being kicked off planes after being deemed "too ginger to fly"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Court orders Sikh mailman be allowed to deliver mail to Disney World, proving once again though the mountains divide, and the oceans are wide, it's a small world after all
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
The legendary Texas prosecutor and television host of Cold Case Files, Kelly Siegler, who brought down a fellow prosecutor for failing to turn over evidence to the defense, has herself been found to have withheld favorable evidence 35+ times
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
Why you should always buy the biggest pie a pizza place makes, because math
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
NYC sanitation department says the World Cup ticker tape parade was a sweeping success. Here's how they did it
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
After reading this, you won't think sunburn tattoos are so cool. In other news, there is a such thing as a sunburn tattoo
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Some guy wears twelve layers of clothing on flight to avoid baggage fee, with predictable results (w/pics)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this polite indication
source: farm9.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
If you must eat meat, all Moby asks is that you skip 26 showers for every 4-ounce hamburger you consume
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fortune)
 
 
 
That most august of holidays ... okay that most July of holidays, Free Slurpee Day is here again
source: fortune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Little Mews is moving to a bigger, better home, just in time for Caturday
source: littlemews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Why are so many adults buying coloring books?
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
"Go Set a Watchman" portrays a now-72-year-old Atticus Finch as a pro-segregation racist who goes to Klan meetings. I hate sequels
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Well great, now we broke the sun. Thanks, climate change deniers
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Judge who sentenced kids to juvie in divorce case has change of heart, sends them to Camp Wunnakeepmajerb instead
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPTV Portland)
 
 
 
Portland International Airport now allows passengers to carry marijuana on in-state flights
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Luis Obispo Tribune)
 
 
 
Target store accidentally broadcasts porn over their PA system. "Expect More ... More ... MORE"
source: sanluisobispo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 10, 2015
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's Friday and you're celebrating with all your fingers left over from last weekend. Must be time for the Fark Weird News Quiz. If you find it too hard after four hours, please contact your doctor
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CityLab)
 
 
 
Melbourne, Australia gave all city trees ID numbers and email addresses so citizens could report problems like dangerous branches. Naturally, dendrophiliac Aussies used them to write pining love letters to their favourite elms
source: citylab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
California prison officials want to know who sawed an inmate in half after prison riot in May
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Tl;dr
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRMG Tulsa)
 
 
 
Woman gets upset after learning Taco Bell doesn't have Wi-Fi, dumps water on teenage employees. Then the knife comes out
source: krmg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(GMX)
 
 
 
Photoshop this friendly wave
source: i0.gmx.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Re/code)
 
 
 
Citing a "Mutual Decision," Ellen Pao resigns from Reddit in order to spend more time with her lawyers
source: recode.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
As if shark attacks were not bad enough, the Eastern seaboard are now being invaded by Portuguese Man-of-Wars
source: gma.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Journal (Ireland))
 
 
 
Good question: Does putting a spoon in a bottle of Prosecco actually keep it fizzy overnight? Better question: Who doesn't finish a bottle of Prosecco the same night?
source: thedailyedge.thejournal.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Remember the media's July 4th terror panic? The actual intelligence report said "Meh, there's nothing to really worry about"
source: phasezero.gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
US Marshal caught having sex on the roof of a federal courthouse. Apparently every gas station, residence, warehouse, farmhouse, henhouse, outhouse and doghouse in a six mile radius was unavailable
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRTV Great Falls)
 
 
 
Highway rest stops are really convenient when you need to go pee, stretch your legs, give birth, grab a drink...wait, what?
source: krtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Radio Sweden)
 
 
 
Santa Claus' reindeer depth-chart takes a big hit
source: sverigesradio.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
That shoot-out between an ex-CNN anchor and a would-be robber just got a whole lot weirder, as the robber was apparently a "slave" of a man named Skyy Barrs who has now been charged with murder
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Bill Cosby's mistress defends him. This... may not help
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Unbeknownst to most consumers, organic farmers have resorted to using all natural carcinogens as pesticides
source: ascienceenthusiast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deslidefied)
 
 
 
Innocent things from our childhoods that could be seen as offensive and even be banned today. Shame on you, Pepe Le Pew
source: deslide.clusterfake.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when the police are chasing a guy in a truck and he speeds ahead and crashes into your home and when cops investigate the scene they discover your large marijuana grow operation? Me too
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSTP St. Paul)
 
 
 
Usually you don't file a complaint with the police in pepper spray. Usually
source: kstp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
Welsh government responds to question about UFOs in Klingon. Or it could just be Welsh, no-one can tell
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 19 Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Sometimes you take a bite out of crime, sometimes crime takes a bite out of you ... (w/ "GAH, that's a hard 31" mugshot)
source: fox19.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
It's not really a stag party until you get a $10,000 bill for damages and banned from an airline for life
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Manchester Evening News)
 
 
 
Wanted man in Piccadilly Gardens probably has figured out by now the it was the hedgehog that did him in after being arrested by police. You see hedgehogs do not like being kept in bags
source: manchestereveningnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Lawmakers move to ban gun-shaped phone case, saying police could confuse it with a rock, bandage, fruit, game controller, or other things innocent people have been shot for holding
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Canadian Game Warden rescues two adorable orphaned bear cubs, receives commendation. Just kidding, he's suspended without pay for not shooting them
source: feeds.nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
How bad are the wildfires in Saskatchewan? They're sending in the tanks (and not the water filled kind)
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Nearly forgotten in a South Carolina safe for decades, this is the telegram that helped get Hitler fired up to put a gun in his mouth and fire up
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this young warrior in training
source: media.zenfs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
There's no point in beating a dead horse, but if you really want to do it, there's one tied up outside this lady's home
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scary Mommy)
 
 
 
Concerned parents around the nation are asking the question: Is the new McDonald's Happy Meal Minion toy using the F-word? In other news, concerned parents around the nation are f-ing idiots
source: scarymommy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
During WWII, the US Army tested chemical weapons on US troops. White soldiers were the controls, while the mustard gas was used on African and Asian Americans and Puerto Ricans
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Welcome to Japan. Please enjoy your stay and our beautiful manhole covers
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hampton Roads)
 
 
 
Highway to the stupid zone
source: hamptonroads.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Western Morning News)
 
 
 
"A young man who crashed his father's £100,000 Audi R8 supercar in to a neighbour's house has been handed a 15-month suspended jail sentence - and had his allowance stopped" (pic)
source: westernmorningnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KBOI2 Boise)
 
 
 
High speed motorcycle crash throws man 0.0025 Rhode Islands
source: kboi2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
It's the All-American story: One famous band, one huge secret, many lives destroyed. Ladies and gentleman, welcome to the stage: The Runaways
source: highline.huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Now it makes sense. Subby is a panda bear trapped in a man's body
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
The cake is a lie
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
How climatologists ward off existential dread and ennui
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Ever wondered what embryos' favourite music was? Apparently it's Latin pop
source: thelocal.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Sure, China is having problems with their economic meltdown right now, but their real problems are this weekend with three typhoons headed straight for them (one a super typhoon). Here comes the WALLOP
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
New music albums will now release on Fridays instead of Tuesdays. In other news, buggy whips will now be available only in black; typewriters to eliminate the 'q' key
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week UK)
 
 
 
Escaped tortoise lured back by tortoise porn
source: theweek.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Memphis Zoo says a small monkey escaped its enclosure, but should not be considered evil
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Will the most American state please step forward? Not so fast, Nevada. Where is your bald eagle?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Veterinarian finds 62 hair bands inside dog during surgery. Tour schedules updated
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
 
 
Drunk guy allegedly found naked in hog barn tells police "I just like pigs." And to think, Kermit started his career with such promise and early success. It's sad how things just fall apart
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Now you can have tampons delivered to your door, if that's something you might be into
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Psychotic jailed murderer gets hold of razor blades, carves the word "satan" into his forehead, then cuts his tongue like a snake. And prison officials don't know how he got the blades
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
"Thanks dad for talking me down from the ledge"
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Woman learns her neighbor created an elaborate sound system playing workout music on repeat with an amplifier and several speakers to purposely harass her
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Bolivian president earns troll-of-the-decade award by giving Pope Francis the thoughtful gift of Jesus nailed to a hammer-and-sickle
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Probably one of those laser pointer things. What? It was pointed at a US navy ship? Change the headline to say "Navy ship targeted with laser device" so it sounds really bad
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
I'm not suggesting the whole Minions merchandise thing might be getting a little out of hand, but Minion tampons might be a bit much
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Thailand deports 100 ethnic Muslim minorities back to China. Ignored: Uighur pleas
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily News Journal)
 
 
 
$4,000 in clothes taken from a Victoria's Secret, inspiring local police to respond with a dragnet
source: dnj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Man complains about mugshot police use in his wanted poster. Police response is perfect
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these Dead guys
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Torontonians stop by to honour dead raccoon. Even Gideon checked out
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Good news, California: A massive El Nino event is in bloom and should break the drought. Bad news: You're gonna need a bigger boat
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
Protip: Don't smoke a cigarette in an airplane bathroom, especially if you're in possession of some illegal pills. Bonus protip: If you do smoke a cigarette and get caught, don't make things worse by trying to bribe crew members with $20
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
A U. S. Senate bill introduced July 9 would permit banks to do business with marijuana businesses in states where weed is legal without fear of federal repercussions
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
If you make the trek to Japan's Mount Fuji, you can ponder one of the world's most mystical places. You can also log onto FARK while you are there
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AutoBlog)
 
 
 
While you were arguing over gay wedding cakes and civil war flags, someone hacked into a German Patriot missile battery and were able to at least partially take it over
source: autoblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Time for your annual "man pays fine with pennies"...because they legally HAVE to take it they HAVE TO
source: gma.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CityLab)
 
 
 
Iowa Dept. of Transportation chief: "Roads? Where we're going, we don't need roads"
source: citylab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
Pope Francis changes clothes in a Burger King. Where is your God now?
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Along with picking a new side arm, the U.S. military will start using hollow point ammunition. Reaction expected to be fragmented
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Being naked while fleeing in a police car is no way to get through life, son
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
♫It's been a hard day's night, and police treat me like a dog♫
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Intercept)
 
 
 
Hacking Team email reveals employee joked about assassinating ACLU's Christopher Soghoian
source: firstlook.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Willamette Week)
 
 
 
Oregon becomes even more awesome after becoming the second state to offer free community college tuition to all graduating high school students. Don't forget to pack your books and your legalized recreational marijuana
source: wweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
* knock knock * "Excuse me, sir, but have you heard the word of Black Bear Jesus?"
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Bodies of 36 WWII Marines recovered. These are the real heroes we should celebrate
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Here's the moment a young gorilla makes friends with duckies. Awwwww
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Good God Almighty, there is a squirrel virus that jumps to human beings. Three squirrel researchers are dead
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
And today's new, red hot trend is: SETTING YOUR HAIR ON FIRE
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 09, 2015
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
Baby doctor caught hitting grownup bottle
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HelenaIR.com)
 
 
 
The latest Southern city to wrestle with the fate of a divisive symbol of its Confederate past is...Helena, Montana?
source: helenair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Liverpool Echo)
 
 
 
You know how they say bees are good for the garden because they pollinate everything? Well not this many
source: liverpoolecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical Daily)
 
 
 
Just stop messing with the original recipe to impress the youngsters KFC, nobody wants chicken pizza called "Chizza"
source: medicaldaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical Daily)
 
 
 
Research shows pot smokers swap bud for Budweiser when they turn 21
source: medicaldaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 19 Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Woman who crashed her car onto railroad tracks and then was hit by a train: "Don't bother me, I'm drunk"
source: fox19.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reddit)
 
 
 
Witness subpoenaed to appear in criminal court. Difficulty: witness is not quite three months old
source: reddit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this IED finder
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WYFF 4 Greenville)
 
 
 
Not news: Woman not wearing life vest dies after falling out of ski boat. News: Onto the street where it was being towed
source: wyff4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCVB Boston)
 
 
 
Bikeshare asks renters to think about the other customers and keep your clothes on
source: wcvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The terrifying tale of a young, bearded hipster who tried to escape the shackles of his white privilege by taking a low-wage job in a falafel shop -- and ended up even more white privileged than before
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Taco Bell testing new food delivery service for people who really need a chalupa, but can't leave their couch. And lets face it, that's a real problem for lots of Taco Bell chalupa eaters
source: radio.foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Burlington Free Press)
 
 
 
Driver gets ticket for doing 97, speeds off to earn a twofer
source: burlingtonfreepress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
There's drunk, then there's "Not realizing you've been shot in the leg" drunk
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Obey warrant
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Food Nut)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: You want dessert but you don't want to turn on the oven. What to do? Show us your cool dessert treats. And yes, you can include all your booze, you damn lushes
source: foodandwine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
The most terrifying PSAs you've ever seen will convince you never to drown again
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Not a big deal, all things considered
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Broward/Palm Beach New Times)
 
 
 
Are you a vegetarian filled with temptation? Arby's wants to help
source: browardpalmbeach.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Jesus Christ it's a cheetah. INSIDE THE CAR
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these bathing beauties
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Times Square's new welcome wagon gives "a bad impression of New York" - which is saying something
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Bad: you're a pilot and you realize you accidentally brought a handful of live bullets onto a flight. Worse: you cover it up by flushing them down the toilet
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Bunch of guys in black robes to determine if a bunch of guys in white robes can adopt a highway
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Discovery)
 
 
 
What a caramel sundae looks like from space
source: news.discovery.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Sanjay Gupta says he was with Brian Williams when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Caption Pope Francis, Bolivian President Evo Morales, and Communist Jesus
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
Man wants a ride home, calls 911 to report a fake crash. Guess how this one ended up
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Is this some kind of bust?
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Disclose.tv)
 
 
 
New study reveals that bottled water contains chemicals such as the notoriously lethal dihydrogen monoxide and hormone analogs that will turn you into a sexless drone primed for government mind control
source: disclose.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Exeter Express & Echo)
 
 
 
86 prisoners write to local paper to complain that the sudoku is too hard
source: exeterexpressandecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sputnik News)
 
 
 
Here's why North Korea's military couldn't win a skirmish against a bunch of girl scouts. It's just not that good
source: sputniknews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Observer)
 
 
 
Father, whose kids were thrown in juvie for refusing to have lunch with him, gives his side of the story
source: observer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
When robbing a check cashing business, it's probably best to leave your own paystub at home
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
This hip hotel lobby was hip before hotels in Williamsburg Brooklyn were hip
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Denver family reunited with stolen dog after four years, their joy tempered only by the fact that it's still a Yorkie
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Please don't call the self named Islamic State the Islamic State because it may offend the other Islamic States and if you offend the Islamic States you get Islamic State
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Good Samaritans go to the aid of a woman being beaten. However, no one saw the knife coming
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
35 people test positive for tuberculosis at an El Paso school. Officials were just happy to be able to say there were that many passing grades on any Texas school test
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
A surprising study shows most people would prefer temporary social embarrassment over long-term financial ruin
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Mirror)
 
 
 
Forget about the hordes of bees, flies and spiders, it's the hordes of drunk fornicating teens you have to look out for at the beach
source: irishmirror.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Alright, all you amateur lawyers - - - A teenage driver gets a $100 ticket for a restricted license violation on 1/22/15. However the cop mistakenly dates the ticket 10/22/15. Does the kid have a case?
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Vietnamese police search for a man who allowed his dog to steer a motor scooter without a license
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man filming himself with a selfie stick as he walks through crowds at Pope's massive outdoor mass in Ecuador catches the moment a pickpocket steals his phone. God works in mysterious ways
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Okay..for people and stories like this..I guess we can hold off on the asteroid fer a little bit, yet
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(East Grinstead Courier)
 
 
 
How to get a bus to stop outside a pub. 1. "Borrow" a bus stop sign. 2. Place it outside the pub in question. 3. Watch in amazement as buses treat it like a proper stop, and it becomes adopted as part of the route. Easy
source: eastgrinsteadcourier.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WorldWide Weird News)
 
 
 
76-year-old school principal dies with smile on his face
source: worldwideweirdnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Woman charged with DUI had 12 people in the car, including her own kids. Says she was just auditioning to drive the GOP nomination bus
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
This is the pilot. If you look outside your window you'll see the lights of beautiful downtown Chicago, just beyond our flaming engine
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Women's clothing stores are finally starting to admit what men have known for years: "Plus sizes" are the new normal
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A special gift for you, conspiracy theorists: Jade Helm 15 will launch next week without any media being allowed access to cover it
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Remember that Elsa cake that everyone slammed for looking ugly, labeling a cake wreck and comparing it to a professional cake? Well, it was made for a critically ill little girl who loved it because it's one of the last things she'll get to enjoy
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Here are the areas of England and Wales where people don't speak English. Which would be all of it
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
↑ ↑↓ ↓← →← →BArbiturates
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Forget slut-shaming, fat-shaming, or even Cubs fan-shaming; the new sensation in manufactured guilt is air conditioner-shaming
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Because who doesn't want to live in a tiny house in an abandoned shipyard?
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Venture Beat)
 
 
 
I can haz vakashuns? Cheezburger CEO steps down to pursue other opportunities
source: venturebeat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Goin' down, party time. My friends are gonna be there too. I'm on the hiiiiiighway to home detention
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this gravity-defying espresso sipper
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Texas man believes he has the carcass of a chupacabra, proving the old adage "there's a goat sucker born every minute"
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Ahh... to remember the finer things in life is to remember that time when a body came crashing through your kitchen roof from Flight MH17 over the Ukraine last year
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPTV Portland)
 
 
 
Bull decides to assist police in suspect chase, choice praised by U.S. DA
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPTV Portland)
 
 
 
Hot summer months can trigger violent student behavior. Well, that and alcohol
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Co.Exist)
 
 
 
And while we're at it, here are some other Confederate things we should get rid of
source: fastcoexist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCVB Boston)
 
 
 
See you in a while, Krokodil
source: wcvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WECT Wilmington)
 
 
 
Beach lifeguard flies LGBT flag from his stand, is immediately swarmed by supportive beach-goers. Just kidding, people thought it meant he would only rescue gay people
source: wect.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
One block of Denver's Market Street yielded $230,000 worth of parking ticket revenue last year. The block is lined with bars and is near Coors Field. It becomes a tow-away zone after 10 pm. Brilliant?
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
"Yes, somewhere in Florida, there is a land of sex offenders surrounded by candy"
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
In America's nuclear negotiations with Iran, there is a red line... and it's made out of Twizzlers
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
NYC cop off beat for beating off
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Documents show that Exxon knew the link between CO2 and climate change in 1981, but spent the next three decades paying people to dispute it
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
South Carolina House votes to remove confederate flag, 94-20
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
Musician plays national anthem on electric guitar, then is promptly arrested for breach of peace. Police chief says "Out of respect for the national anthem, they let them finish the national anthem,"
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 531: "Boom" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 08, 2015
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Phthalates, chemicals often used in consumer products like soaps, cosmetics, plastic pipes, and shower curtains, are likely part of your microwaved food as well, thanks to leaching from plastic dishes. Yum yum
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
1 killed, 4 hurt in crash at doughnut shop. Police quickly on scene
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MPR News)
 
 
 
The memorial for a bridge that collapsed due to design problems has design problems
source: mprnews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man steals $4,000 worth of fishing equipment, gets $180 net at a pawn shop for it
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Slap on wrist for scrotum on pizza
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Chronicle-Telegram)
 
 
 
Not news: Trial delayed. OMGWTFKILLITWITHFIRE: Trial delayed because prospective juror has bedbugs
source: chronicle.northcoastnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
The Dalai Lama says you'll do better getting over a broken heart if you hold off on the gunga galunga
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this robotic uprising
source: popmeh.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 and 10 News)
 
 
 
Area man passionate defender of what he imagines humor to be
source: 9and10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Mother of Maine dumbass wants us not to have nice things
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
First, they attack our computers, shutting down airlines and stock markets. Now, the Borg are hovering over Texas
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Museum: "Hey kid, the error you found in the golden ratio at one of our exhibits? Yeah, about that"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Utah Doctor faces sentencing for the murder of his medical researcher wife, continues to swear he's innocent of the crime. You know, that premise would make a dynamite movie or TV series
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Rick Astley's never gonna: a. Give you up. b. Let you down. c. Make you cry. d. Hurt you. e. All of the above
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Detroit)
 
 
 
Judge to kids: Go have lunch with your father. Kids: No, because he beat our mother. Judge to kids: Ok, then stay in juvie until you're 18
source: myfoxdetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scottish Legal News)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready headline: "Man appears in court under ancient law of hamesucken"
source: scottishlegal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Wrigley Field catch
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
There are lots of names, followed by "bandit" that you can be. "Gummi Bear" should not be one of them
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
A 1000-foot slip 'n 'slide is coming to Seattle. Organizers suggest you make reservations early, before it gets clogged up with wet flannel
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Texas is putting us all in danger because they struck down eyebrow threading regulations
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Man steals a bicycle, throws it through a restaurant window, then drinks Tabasco sauce because he was thirsty. Investigators believe alcohol was involved
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Company named after a Nazi sympathizer announces it has removed a statue of Bill Cosby from its properties as it no longer wants to be associated with a guy like that
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
No sex please, we're Spanish
source: thelocal.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Could this mugshot of key adviser mean the end of Drew's political aspirations?
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
One man. One taxi. One adult video store robbery. Texas
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(This Is Local London)
 
 
 
Bad: Cyclist hit by a bus. Worse: Thieves steal bicycle moments after the accident
source: thisislocallondon.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Russia handing out pamphlets to combat death by selfie
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
And now, for no particular reason, here's expert advice on what REALLY gets women all giggity... such as chimp porn. What? Don't look at me like that
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Disgruntled diner writes negative restaurant review, gets told by owner to 'grow a set'
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
In the most West Virginia-est story ever--man arrested for holding two deer captive in his home. (With picture of housetrained deer)
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Britain's fattest man who weighed 910 pounds has been laid to rest in a double sized coffin. His cremation will be on Thursday, Friday and Saturday
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
NewsFlash
 
NYSE halts all trading due to technical glitch, emergency eBay and Craigslist systems coming online
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
When you stare into the abyss, the abyss also stares into you. When you stare at the soul-devouring nightmares created when Google's Deep Dream looks at anime, even the abyss might whimper and pee itself
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man claims he was hit in the genitals by a banana thrown from a car. Subsequent police investigation has been fruitless
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
According to the CDC, heroin use in the U.S. has been growing at an "alarming" rate, with overdose fatalities doubling in the past few years. Darwin nods approvingly
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
...and a new ingredient to our custard recipe is avian flu
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Journal News)
 
 
 
Teacher of the year arrested after car wreck in possession of eight decks of heroin, drug paraphernalia and prescription drugs, including Xanax, Triazolam, dextroamphetamine and Loprin, will be promoted to administrator if she can score some blow
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Gosh golly, it's Hop-Con 3.0: The w00tstout Launch Festival in San Diego Wednesday, July 8th
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
Audio
 
Bigfoot ... small penis
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Carnival gets approval to ship Norovirus to Cuba
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
All United flights grounded without explanation. Just sit the friendly ground and wait
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medium)
 
 
 
"Dear people who live in fancy, tiny houses, do you ever wake up wondering, 'I've made a huge mistake?'"
source: medium.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mason City Globe Gazette)
 
 
 
Apparently the traditional 50th anniversary gift to your spouse includes both gold and an internal organ
source: globegazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pool heater
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
You think oil is expensive? You should see how much breast milk goes for
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Ultra-rare, 1-in-50 million split-color lobster caught in Maine, was delicious
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Getting revenge by posting fake sex ads using your exes' photos isn't a very nice thing to do, YOUR HONOR
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
What do women really want? To sleep with their stepbrothers
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
British researchers invent video game that helps you lose weight in just one week by training your brain to avoid unhealthy food like cookies and Doritos
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
 
 
80% of 500 doctors, nurses, and physicians assistants surveyed admit going to work with communicable diseases because their employers don't provide sick leave
source: denver.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
How I found out my partner was gay
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
WHO is unfit for health emergencies. Who? WHO
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
'Vampires' keep doctors in the dark for fear of stereotyping: study
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Not all young women who agree to hook up with old men after meeting them online are cops, but you might wish they were after reading this
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
A woman who once took a selfie in front of a fire in New York City is now working for the DNC. THIS MEANS SOMETHING. I SHOULD BE OUTRAGED
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(12News Phoenix)
 
 
 
Pregnancy has become so en vogue for women these days that they have begun editing photos of positive test results early, a phenomenon known as "tweaking"
source: 12news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blabbermouth)
 
 
 
Study finds 1980's metalheads and groupies all became drug-addled bums working dead end jobs. Just Kidding, they're actually better adjusted in society than middle-aged or current college-age youth. \m/ -.- \m/
source: blabbermouth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 Now)
 
 
 
I'm not sure, but I really don't recall the job description for assistant softball coach requiring you to text underage girls pics of your junk with the message "I thought you should see why white guys are better"
source: scrippsmedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 07, 2015
(DNA Info)
 
 
 
Guy successfully distracts his beer pong opponent and wins the match. Also, two people ended up in the hospital
source: dnainfo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
New York City: where even the squirrels know the right way to eat a slice, but the mayor doesn't and insists on using a knife and fork like some stunod from Scarsdale
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Leading research university in Canada to offer new courses on quantum healing, alternative math (2+2=5) and unicorn anatomy
source: factually.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The mayor of the appropriately-named Whitesboro, NY swears its town seal is not racist--which is a bit hard to square with the seal's depiction of what appears to be a white settler choking a Native American man to death
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stitcher)
 
 
 
The Farkcast is back and presents: John Scalzi
source: stitcher.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
You know that Tinder profile with the pic of a celebrity? The one that keeps sending you pictures of his penis? Well, Tinder has some good news for you
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Pair of British pilots pull off barnstorming stunt using science. Two planes one hangar
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fashionable woman wearing sunglasses
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Santa Cruz Sentinel)
 
 
 
On this day in 1928, the greatest thing ever was first sold
source: santacruzsentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Company sells spy tools to evil governments. With pic of evil hacker goatee
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Canadian arrested for sending mail bombs, apology notes, to law firms involved in his divorce
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Can you balance your best friend on the end of your nose? Bob the Golden Retriever can... just sayin'
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Police looking for four men who robbed a Golden Corral and shot a manager at the store prior to making their slow, pudding-like exit
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Changes in multi-state Powerball to increase the odds of winning from 1-in-Trump winning the presidency to 1-in-Cubs winning the World Series
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Judge to Cosby: "People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw poundcake" (I'm paraphrasing)
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Korea Times (US))
 
 
 
Best Korea asks for aid in midst of drought. Also in midst of testing biological weapons on its civilians. In unrelated news, a picture of Kim Jong Un letting his generals know who dealt the most recent biological weapon
source: koreatimesus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
Restaurant get your order wrong? That seems as good a reason as any to call 911
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
"If it weren't for shooting my miniature horse, I wouldn't have spent that month in jail"
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop Tennis Match this empty desert road
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Man goes on hunger strike to force insurance company to pay for weight-loss surgery, which he may not need if they hold out long enough (Not safe for work content in sidebar)
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Apparently eating your cereal with ice cubes in it is a thing with the 'ice in your cereal' crowd
source: uk.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
We're only one typhoon away from having super powers
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
The case for a 4-day work week. Dude, that's going to significantly cut into my Farking time
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A software engineer explains why she decided to do something worthwhile with her life and so became a writer instead
source: indiacurrents.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Why is America so over air-conditioned? Because shut up and pass me that fleece, that's why
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Comment about pony tail sparks mass brawl and derails tram
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
There are strong crosswinds at Birmingham airport today and that means there's tons of footage of passenger jets making the kind of landings that will swear you off flying for the rest of your life
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
And in Pamplona, the early score is Bulls 11, Idiots 0
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
A look at how the same B.M.I. can yield a very different body type in a 5'9, 172 pound man. Or, yet more proof that B.M.I. can never accurately capture the true nature of your Cheetos-sculpted body
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Dear Morrison's. Is the secret ingredient in shampoo really poo like my dad says?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LAist)
 
 
 
Whoever ordered the 1 million French donuts to be flown to Las Vegas is probably wise not to have them escorted by police. Keeping Homer Simpson out of the landing gear will probably prove harder dough
source: laist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Frenchwoman jailed for 'magic cheese' scam. Apparently, it was all just a fromage mirage
source: thelocal.fr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Fishermen go out for snapper tournament only to catch the much prized wild boar fish known for its bacon-like goodness
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Paula Deen uses TransformationTuesday to be an asshole to Hispanics instead of black people
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Parents told to beware of clowns selling balloons at inflated prices
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
"This is my horrendous car, it could be yours. I'll level with you, it's shiate - all rusted and stinks of mackerel. I eat a lot of mackerel. Decent stereo, but I'm keeping that"
source: scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 Now)
 
 
 
Doctors of alternative medicine in Florida are dying off. Some are concerned about this trend. Not the police, mind you
source: scrippsmedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
Illuminati, Knights Templar, Freemasons and Trilateral Commission tremble in fear as true evil makes its move with Apple CEO Tim Cook and NBA Commissioner Adam Silver joining Duke University's Board of Trustees
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 Now)
 
 
 
Stifler and his mom arrested after attacking police officer
source: scrippsmedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo UK)
 
 
 
Google's Dream Robot is running wild across the Internet. Pics in article will ensure you'll never have another good night's sleep again
source: gizmodo.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Here's an interactive map of where all 447 presidential candidates live. See which of your neighbors is running
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Oh come on, bankers aren't all that ba... Oh MY GOD, what the hell were you thinking
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Three-year-old gets first parking ticket
source: atlantic.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NASA)
 
 
 
I'm not saying it's aliens, but the Dawn mission to Ceres has now gone into safe mode, too
source: dawn.jpl.nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Leighton Buzzard Observer)
 
 
 
Parents horrified after 'swearing doll' teaches their 2-year-old the F-word. Warning: contains the F-word, repeatedly - video
source: leightonbuzzardonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Something new on Fark mobile. Will you get over it?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Man wins $75,000 costume contest prize at Walmart
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
World's second oldest person becomes the world's oldest person
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Snow from Boston's harsh winter still melting away in July, but it's kinda hard to tell because of all the trash on it
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
No shirt? No shoes? No clothes? No service
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
We always knew something big was happening with Jared Fogle. Just not this
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Residents in Pearl River, NY, be on the lookout for one crazy-assed rabid black cat
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
I'm pretty sure that this is what Hell is filled with
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: Everyone think it's hilarious to make Hillary Clinton jokes to and about me because my name is Hilary. We're nothing alike; I have one L in my name and I'm aggressive at work. It offends me, these jokes. How do I get people to stop?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yandex.ru)
 
 
 
Photoshop this classic beauty
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