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Sun June 14, 2015
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
Sorry, town's closed. Moose out front should have told you
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
School forgets to call name of wheelchair-bound student during graduation ceremony. It's OK, though, because the stage wasn't wheelchair-accessible anyway
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Father Of The Year candidate sends a man who looked "a bit like him" to take a court ordered paternity test. Judge: "Morally, no one can sink lower than you"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
 
 
Marijuana and Health Symposium at National Jewish Health explores nine studies looking at using pot for things like seizures and insomnia: "We can't bury our heads in the sand. We need to learn more and make sensible decisions based on evidence"
source: denver.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Happy birthday to the document that laid the foundation of our entire legal system. No, Kansas, it's not the Bible
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
In a move to make them more annoying, cyclists can become caravaneers
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this statuesque poser
source: southernfan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFist)
 
 
 
"We're not sure what a beef teriyaki sandwich looks like, so here's a stock image of a roast beef sandwich"
source: sfist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHDH Boston)
 
 
 
Washington state trooper goes above and beyond to escort woman who got lost on her scooter back home by following her and letting her drive her scooter as fast as it will go (6mph) for an hour until she makes it home
source: whdh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medium)
 
 
 
Balloon animals as you've never imagined them before. Only from Japan, of course
source: medium.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Meanwhile, raccoons have started riding alligators
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
A 101-year-old woman attributed her knocking back two glasses of wine, a Southern Comfort and a beer each day as the reason for her long life
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Ice cream man shot to death. There will be a traditional sundae service
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pack
source: cbsnewyork.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Neighbors lose battle to have pink bunny statue removed
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
City Etiquette Dilemma : You have an infested mattress. Should you wrap the mattress in plastic before throwing it out on the street, or is it enough to spray paint the word 'BUGS' on the mattress?
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
No, basketball team, you cannot have the park. Not yours
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Pentagon may put heavy weaponry in Eastern Europe to deter Russia. Hmm...where have we heard this plan before? Something, something, Cold War
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Chattanooga police now have radar equipped bicycles so they can fine drivers that don't leave at least 3 feet when passing a cyclist
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
Picture your father. Now, picture your father wearing THIS. (Slightly not safe for work, lunch)
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS San Francisco)
 
 
 
Here is something that sounds like it came from a horror movie but did not: Giant purple sea slugs invade beaches
source: sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
There's something kind of outlaw romantic about the police raiding your home and finding enough dried pot to fill a 55-gallon garbage bag but you escape the long arm of the law by sailing away on a skiff
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
"It's just been a nightmare," he said. "The system is broken and I'm afraid if it hasn't already happened, it's gonna happen to someone else. It may happen to you, to anyone"
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOCO Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Authorities in Moore, Oklahoma would like parents to talk to their precious snowflakes about the dangers of jumping off of bridges into shallow water to cool off despite the posted warnings against swimming and diving
source: koco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Navy christens newest combat gunship, the USS Gabrielle Giffords
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Four dead in Ohio. This is not a repeat from 1970
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
We're not talking peanuts here... OK so maybe we are, but they are in fact the road to a long healthy life
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
We're not saying the average Texan is dumb, but it's real hard for some of them to tell the difference between a cloud and a UFO
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Oldest newlyweds in the world, ages 103 and 91, exchange wedding vows. Emotional ceremony had friends crying, children sobbing, cake in tiers
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this strategic maneuver
source: a57.foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Graduation shenanigans
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Today is Flag Day in the U.S. How will you celebrate the birth of the red, white, and blue?
source: en.m.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Esperanto speakers claim the language is not quite dead yet. With a helpful picture of what an Esperanto speaker looks like
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Hippopotamus, lions, wolves and tigers on the loose in Tbilisi ... OH MY
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
New study from the Romero Institute of Research shows some colleges help athletes cheat and even pay students to take tests for athletes so they can focus on the whole point of college: sports practice
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
The quick rabid brown fox jumps over a lazy dog, attacks and bites woman
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(GQ)
 
 
 
Not news: Man living near airport paints his roof. News: Paints "Welcome to Cleveland." Fark: He lives in Milwaukee
source: gq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
It's Saturday night in Juneau, Alaska and that means it's once again time for Livingston Stapler Company Presents. 2 hours of music hosted live by a farker (9 pm AKDT/10 pm PDT)
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
How Disney World left the middle class behind. Fantasyland, indeed
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 13, 2015
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Dial it back a bit, dear
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Rich Californians: "You'll have to pry our hoses from our cold, dead hands"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
No, Mark Wahlberg doesn't want to see you in your underwear, so stop sending him pictures. That goes double for you, Bieber
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times of Israel)
 
 
 
Cheerleaders in Mexico perform Nazi themed routine complete with swastika displays and Nazi salute. Naturally, everyone involved claims ignorance
source: timesofisrael.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop today's wtf
source: cbsnews1.cbsistatic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Building owner sued by graffiti artists for painting over their work, because it violates the U.S. Visual Artists Rights Acts
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Grub Street)
 
 
 
Will you spend $8 on a single chocolate-chip cookie? The folks at Untitled are banking that you will
source: grubstreet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
It turns out millennials are actually strong-willed, resourceful individuals who favor happiness and a strong work ethic over greed and laziness. You know, the complete opposite of baby boomers
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star (Lebanon))
 
 
 
If you are holding territory in northern Syria, please step forward. Not so fast, ISIS
source: dailystar.com.lb   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
In case you did not know, during the summer kids are more likely to get injured. TO THE ROMEROCOPTER
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rocketnews 24)
 
 
 
Tokyo restaurant's amazing $5 lunch has all the key words missing from American fast food: nutritious, delicious, filling
source: en.rocketnews24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this rage
source: media.zenfs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
California oil spill cleanup cost reaches $62 million. Officials at Plains All American fear being billed for three hours of profits
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Iranian women are protesting by showing off their hair. Long beautiful hair. Shining, gleaming, streaming, flaxen, waxen
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Panama City Beach is banning what most spring breakers go to Panama City Beach for
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RantFood)
 
 
 
Once dominant fast food and restaurant chains that are now history. Subby could really go for some Steak & Ale right now
source: rantfood.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Lawsuit claims man died of a botched pedicure. Attorneys for the man's family vow the responsible parties will know the agony of defeat
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Indiana loses its collective mind after the state saw its first black bear in 144 years
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Study by the Romero Institute for the Glaringly Apparent proves that dogs are loyal to their owners
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Swiss court slashes the richest divorce payout in history. Ex-wife's $4.8 billion award cut to a barely livable $604 million
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
JESUS CHRISTUS, es ist ein Elefant, bleibt im Wagen!
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
The OPM breach now seems to include complete blackmail kits for anyone who applied for clearance, and anyone who knew them. But hey, you get a year of free credit monitoring. Subby delighted to finally use new tag
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SafeBee)
 
 
 
Tips on when to seek medical treatment for a cut. Bottom line, if you think you might need it, you probably need it
source: safebee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Comic Book Resources)
 
 
 
Tara Schultz is shocked to discover a memoir about growing up during the Iranian revolution contains -- wait for it -- violence. This was a 200 level English lit class, so she "expected Batman and Robin." Tara Schultz, welcome to Fark
source: robot6.comicbookresources.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
More people would bike if we could just eliminate cul-de-sacs
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DNA Info)
 
 
 
Wannabe hipsters, in order to stay up with the times you need to dump that piss swill beer called PBR and step it up a notch with a fine beer called Narragansett from Rhode Island if you want to be like a Williamsburg hipster
source: dnainfo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Record (UK))
 
 
 
Really, so you need to fly into a rage and threaten arrest because your neighbor has a garden gnome with a bare bum? You're an ass, Mr. Ex-policeman
source: dailyrecord.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Miami)
 
 
 
News: U.S. Coast Guard offloads 328 kilograms of cocaine, 3,100 pounds of marijuana, worth $13.7 million into Miami on Friday morning. Fark: Article doesn't say what they did with all the drugs (w/video)
source: nbcmiami.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South Jersey Courier-Post)
 
 
 
It's tough to write a good headline
source: courierpostonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these leaders
source: media.zenfs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
If you've been waiting too long in an emergency room for the staff to attend to you, the best way to get their attention is to hold a lighter up to the hospital's sprinkler system and watch as everyone leaves the building
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Tiger Tim ended up at a shelter and became so distraught that he wouldn't touch his food because his heartless human gave him up over new couches. Please help him find a new home by Caturday
source: catchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
You know who ELSE may have hidden a treasure map leading to a £50m haul in a sheet of music?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Heavy)
 
NewsFlash
 
Video of a crazy shootout in Dallas with an armored van
source: heavy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
High school senior's clever yearbook quote comes as a surprise ... especially to his parents
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 12, 2015
(Fark)
 
 
 
Man, I almost let you guys go home for the weekend without giving you the Fark Weird News Quiz. Thanks for the reminder, I'd completely forgotten
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
There are bad tattoos, and then there is "tattoo that make doctors think you have cancer" bad
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
This note just posted: Body Found on 3M Campus
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sweet ride
source: media.zenfs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
It's always sad when you have to put your elderly mother in a home. It's kind of worse when you kick her out of one
source: thelocal.fr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Good news--if you deleted your salacious twerking video from YouTube, these dudes archived it and are charging people $20 to watch it
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Dear Mr. Native New Yorker: I understand that bodega cats are sort of a treasured little oddity in New York, but I have terrible cat allergies - Can I tell bodega cat to beat it, or should I just keep my mouth shut?
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
You can plan your next flight with a travel agent, a travel web site, or just call an airline yourself. However, calling the police and threatening to kill the president is unlikely to get you a good window seat
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
NAACP speaks up about the controversy with its Spokane chapter president: "Really? People are actually making a big deal about this?"
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Polar bears are starting to eat dolphins, which is further proof of climate change, just how freaking awesome polar bears are
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Maryland clarifies that free range chicken is safe. Oh did I say chicken? I meant to say children
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
What can Britain's gunless boobies teach American police? Wait, hold on. *re-reads article* Bobbies. Gunless bobbies. Christ, you people talk weird
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WAVY Virginia)
 
 
 
You know your flooding problems are getting out of hand when the only people left who can help are the Dutch
source: wavy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop what what was in this coin purse
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
PayPal: Allow us to robocall you, or close your account. FCC: Not so fast, PayPal
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCCI Des Moines)
 
 
 
Finally some judicial overreach we can get behind: IA Supreme Court affirms right to be drunk on front porch
source: kcci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Border police in France told to say "Hello, thank you and goodbye" to tourists as the French try to drop the reputation that they are rude to visitors
source: thelocal.fr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Eastern Ukraine experiencing such a severe "brain drain" as educated professionals flee to either Kiev or the west, that only the stupid and desperate will be left if Russia succeeds in annexing it. Unclear if this is a feature or a bug
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
GM mechanics find that fixing a Corvette museum piece has unexpected challenges, particularly the ones which GM created
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Manchester Evening News)
 
 
 
Hmmmm... maybe stashing your stolen Mercedes in a police station car park was not such a cunning plan
source: manchestereveningnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Sex starved single man: "Right, let's get to it." Talking sex doll: "I have a headache"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Pimpin' ain't easy (to convict)
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The release of Google Glasses may have been shaky but Parkinson sufferers are finding them quite useful
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
American Airlines employees have seen a lot of spinals, dude, and this lady was a fake. A farking goldbricker
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Norwegian mass murderer Anders Breivik writes letter to newspaper complaining about death threats and the fact that everyone calls him a mass murderer
source: thelocal.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Caller)
 
 
 
Marilyn Mosby says it's absurd that she could be considered a cop-hater because she comes from five generations of cops. Crooked cops, but still
source: dailycaller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
A true love can last for years, even if it's between Vladimir Putin and Silvio Berlusconi
source: thelocal.it   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
If your therapist's shopping list includes oranges, duct tape, baby powder, and handcuffs, chances are that it's going to come up at their trial for bogus gay conversion therapy
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(APM Marketplace)
 
 
 
Rich Marin County, CA residents upset over George Lucas' plan to build affordable housing on Grady Ranch. "Basically you've volunteered us for the ghetto"
source: marketplace.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
That data breach that allowed hackers to obtain personnel records of millions of government employees...you know, the one the Feds say they caught because of their new enhanced security? It was really found by vendor doing a product demo
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Mirror)
 
 
 
Has Russia nuked one of its own cities to try and start World War III? Does everyone have enough tin-foil for the coming Armageddon?
source: irishmirror.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: My wife and I are Harry Potter fans; we were our colleges' Quidditch teams. My wife is reading the books to our 7 year-old daughter, but calling it Harriet Potter. This is worse than changing her religion without telling me. What do?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Teenager fleeing the scene of an accident gets caught anyway after crashing straight into a swimming pool, which he insists came out of nowhere
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
O-o
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
"We decided that we would go around the solar system with a spaceship driven by nuclear bombs, so we would launch the ship into space. Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb. Going up at about four bombs per second all the way to Mars"
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this drugstore farmboy from Medford, Oregon 1939
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jewish Press)
 
 
 
Nobody expects the reversal of the Spanish Inquisition
source: jewishpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Sometimes the people in the pet shop lie
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPHO Phoenix)
 
 
 
Hotmail is in the news for the first time since 2011
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Sgt. Stedenko and the Narcs bust a pot shop in Santa Ana, are captured on video eating edibles and playing darts
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Spokane NAACP President is white, or so say her white parents
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"Dear Coleen: My boyfriend squeaks when we have sex." Hmm ... maybe try some lube?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Hell hath no fury like pissed off R. Kelly fans upset that he refused to take the stage at a concert they paid good money to attend
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Herald Sun)
 
 
 
Malaysian Airways flight reports fire on board and makes emergency landing in Australia, which is better than their usual 'let's put it out with sea water' method
source: heraldsun.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
New anti-bullying 'Dick Tracy' comic strip will feature Dick Tracy's young granddaughter Honeymoon, a mother-son duo acting as comic as advisers to Tracy, Little Orphan Annie and The Cardinal. No LSD was used in the making of this headline
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Man uses his Ford truck to run over bald eagles at the dump
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Director of the No Duh Center at the Captain Obvious Institute deduces that those who dislike spicy food are the ones who are most sensitive to the burning sensation
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fortune)
 
 
 
"You cannot tell me that your business model relies on paying people below the poverty line," says restaurant owner who abolished tipping, pays a decent salary plus bonus, and has obviously never ... uh ... ok so he quadrupled his profits
source: fortune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Can you reach behind your back around your waist and touch your belly button? Congratulations, you have just completed the newest internet craze: The Belly Button Challenge
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Cannabist)
 
 
 
Colorado collects $10 million in pot taxes for schools in four months, compared to $13 million from all of 2014: "It's really good to see the excise tax increasing and providing needed money for the public school construction fund"
source: thecannabist.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
♫ Shave and a haircut, (I cut you) to bits ♫
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Colbert Late Show)
 
 
 
25 Famous Paintings Improved by Avocados (ad free slideshow)
source: colbertlateshow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Cleveland judge finds probable cause to charge two police officers in Tamir Rice shooting, suggests prosecutors consider it pretty please. National media news flashes the non-binding opinion
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Great Falls Tribune)
 
 
 
Fun: bringing your pet to show and tell. Not so much: it's a bat, and 100 of your classmates might need rabies shots
source: greatfallstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
For most people, shooting yourself in the foot is a metaphor to describe doing something stupid that keeps you from accomplishing something. Then there's this guy
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Hey Zimbabwe, we'll give you $5 for 175 quadrillion dollars. Zimbabwe: Deal
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 11, 2015
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Follow up to the OPM breech last week. Turns out the hackers stole the Social Security numbers of EVERY Federal employee
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Tim Horton's surprises customers with coffee for a buck
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(East Grinstead Courier)
 
 
 
Dorking man charged with Assault with Pastry
source: eastgrinsteadcourier.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWSB ABC 7)
 
 
 
That awkward moment when you realize the wheelchair-bound man you just killed in a hit and run accident is one of your relatives
source: mysuncoast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
The surviving sharks from the I-95 wreck are recuperating at SeaWorld. Here's hoping they haven't seen "Blackfish"
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
After having an x-ray, 94-year-old badass war veteran discovers he was shot in his ass 60 years ago
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
"He got my money, and I want my drugs," Heller told a 911 dispatcher
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Not news: Man breaks his leg. Sick news: While attempting sex with a horse. Fark: For the THIRD time
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop this shell
source: img13.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Taco Bell executives are studying words and phrases used by Millennials in hopes of staying on fleek with the corporate strategy of making sure the restaurants are lit with customers and critics don't throw shade at them
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
If you think you've got it bad, at least you weren't born an albino on one of Panama's sun-drenched islands
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
The Battle Of Barcelona is pitting pissed-off residents against drunk, naked tourists. Our money is on the drunks
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IHS Jane's)
 
 
 
Proving that the Chinese will copy anything, they're now jumping on the MLP bandwagon
source: janes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charlotte Observer)
 
 
 
NC rolls out online driver license renewal, making it possible to cheat both the eye test and road sign ID portion. But at least it's "more convenient for people"
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Cleanup in Aisle 4"
source: charlestondailymail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man who had penis chopped off died from auto-erotic asphyxiation while covered in blue paint. He leaves behind six children, two grandchildren, and a hell of a legacy
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Right Wing Watch)
 
 
 
Do you get emotional during your period, ladies? That is just your "God-given sadness" at the loss of potential life
source: rightwingwatch.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
The mail slot of a furniture store is not your own personal urinal
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Sad: Dog dies locked inside hot car. Tragic: Owner dies as well
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRCR TV Redding)
 
 
 
Residents outraged because someone decided to pick up piece of garbage on side of road
source: krcrtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
We can all rest easily: "the Michelangelo of buttocks injections" has been jailed. Apparently, her business was in arrears
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: It's not just the ingredients or recipe, it's also the preparation, proper utensils, and the cooking style. Help your fellow Farkers out. Share your tips and tricks for getting the cooking results that take some practice
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Outside Online)
 
 
 
Montana claims its first surfing fatality
source: outsideonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
"I now no longer know if I'm being trolled, if people are in on the joke, if it's causing genuine anger, or if society is simply doomed"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
People bring back all sorts of souvenirs when returning from vacations. Usually, that list does not include venomous centipedes
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Create a new breakfast cereal
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WorldNetDaily)
 
 
 
DHS is SECRETLY recording citizens at an airport to help study behavioral patterns to determine "malicious intent." And the reason WND knows all about this SECRET is because DHS SECRETLY issued a press release
source: wnd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
You're going to need a bigger boat. No, really, the fish won't fit onboard
source: thelocal.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
You can legally eat those fun brownies now
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
'Miracle autism cure' claims to purge the body of all ailments. There may be some truth to it, too, since anyone who takes it will soon find all of their problems are over
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
The German Autobahn has no speed limits, no speed traps, and no elderly men on electric scooters. Well, maybe one of those isn't quite true
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Baby apes sent to 'forest school' in wheelbarrow. With pics that will either make you go 'Awwwww' or haunt your nightmares
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Fox News wants to remind you that you should be telling your children not to have sex. Because that always works
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STV.tv)
 
 
 
Animal welfare charity investigates report of neglected donkey, find well-treated and healthy garden ornament
source: news.stv.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
Postmen refuse to deliver mail in London neighborhood, citing "a plague of rats as big as cats"
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Moscow Times)
 
 
 
Russian man tries to escape arrest by eating his tablet. Worked
source: themoscowtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
You know you've screwed up when you get a personal scolding from the Pope himself
source: thelocal.it   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
National Corn on the Cob Day is a real holiday, not some corn council gimmick
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Is a new water conservation billboard in San Francisco telling people to "go full frontal" and upgrade their washing machines too sexy for a public audience? Asked the dumbest person in the world
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Moran arrested for nude sunbathing
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
A gentleman may kiss a lady's hand, although he probably should stop there and not move on to licking
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Times)
 
 
 
Adultery is OK so long as it's just business, Japanese court rules
source: japantimes.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Journal)
 
 
 
Online sales tax could be coming soon to an Internet near you
source: nationaljournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Poor people make better business and financial decisions than the moderately wealthy or wealthy. For instance, you never see them wasting their money on giant yachts
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Austrian brothel gives away free sex and alcohol for eight weeks to protest its 5 million euro tax bill... and has already had to turn away hundreds of customers
source: thelocal.at   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"This is the storm I always wanted - a supercell with a tornado underneath" (pics)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
And on the 14th year, the Buddhas rose from the rubble and were born anew. Buddha: The slow-resurrecting Jesus
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Not news: The stories in the Daily Fail are fake. Fark: Unfortunately many of the people in those stories are real
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Closer Online)
 
 
 
Female Dannermora prison worker helped inmate escape 'because he had a big penis'
source: closeronline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Attention Walmart shoppers, there is a man in aisle seven taking photos up women's dresses - and here's the pic to prove it
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Looks like today's youth are spending so much time on their rainbow parties, purple drank, I-Dosing, choking games, cinnamon challenges, smarties smoking, and car surfing that they don't even have time for old fashioned binge drinking anymore
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Unfortunately, Dante's Inferno only lists the top nine levels of hell, and doesn't continue down to #347 where we'd find out what happens to people who steal church donations meant for a toddler with leukemia
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
One in four U.S. kids have been exposed to weapons violence. Unfortunately three out of four were the ones using the weapons
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
There's nothing worse than crashing into the DMV during your driving exam
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
OK, which one of you freaks was taking a sponge bath in the bathroom sink? 'Cause I gotta say, that's really lowering my work productivity
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"The beard trend is over and done"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
They'll get over it
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Grub Street)
 
 
 
The long wait is over. Pizza Hut's hot dog stuffed crust finally comes to America
source: grubstreet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lady by the waterfall
source: orig08.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Saruman, Count Dooku, and Dracula have all died. RIP - Sir Christopher Lee
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
"Hitman killed wrong victim with target's name." Sarah Connor unavailable for comment
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
'Quite an experience to live in fear, isn't it?'
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Yu watches porn on back of taxi motorbike. Motorbike hits speed bump. Yu loses balance, falls off, breaks penis. Oh, Yu
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Just a reminder: If you're president of the school PTA and there's $14,000 in the treasury, PTA does not mean "parent takes all"
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Baltimore cops speak out: Not being allowed to murder anyone we like really hurts our feelings
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
School Principal loses his job and has his life ruined for commenting on the Texas Pool Party fiasco
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
US embassy moves July 4 forward a month - so as to not offend Muslims
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Colorado lowers marijuana tax to 8%, so you'll get more green bud with your greenbacks
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Urban moose calves are a risk to mountain bikers and good samaritans, but would make an awesome band name
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Blood donor from Australia has saved the lives of 2 million babies by donating his own red liquid
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Taking your date to the high school prom by helicopter is mega cool. Even more impressive if you're the pilot
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
And you all thought Astrology was hokum. Don't give me that "correlation does not equal causation" crap. We have been vindicated
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
The National Park Service will not object to Alaska officially changing the name of Mount McKinley to Denali. Thanks, Obama
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belfast Live)
 
 
 
Pop-up prison restaurant allows you to enjoy prison food without the trouble of being sent to prison
source: belfastlive.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 527: "High Key" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 10, 2015
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Twelve pickup tailgates stolen in Denver in 2 weeks. Sounds like someone's planning a party
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The timeless story behind the flawless headline "Headless Body in Topless Bar"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Kids selling lemonade in their yard? That's a health code violation
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Sure a lot of places have poisonous spiders, but do they have exploding spiders like the ones all over Britain?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
International college students in Japan describe Americans
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this big-ass glass door
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Like being chased by a wrinkly monster that smells like lube and Vicks VapoRub?
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"Actually, that report of a plane crash was simply a monster truck getting a bath"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Truckload of sharks crashes on interstate because Florida, that's why
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Error: device drivers for "engine" not found. Please reboot the aircraft and try again
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
No, teacher, piercing a child's ear with a stapler is not a recommended discipline for unruly kindergarteners. Now off to the corner with you
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(In Touch Weekly)
 
 
 
The Duggars had a showdown with DHS reps who were attempting to check on a minor that they were concerned about, and the police were called. This is not a repeat
source: intouchweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Caltrans discovers building SF's new Bay Bridge out of Chinese "Steel" was about as advisable as using "Sonya-sonic" batteries in a life support system
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
There's a reason they're called fire ants, dumbass
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
 
 
 
Traffic fines are not about revenue generation, they are to protect citizens
source: triblive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Arizona pastor prays for God to rip out Caitlyn Jenner's heart: "I hate him with a perfect hatred." Just like Jesus said
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
In one small thrust for man and one giant leap for mankind, Pornhub is crowdfunding a space mission to shoot an adult film in low-Earth orbit
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(El Paso Times)
 
 
 
Vermont man shows up for jury duty wearing a prisoner costume. Comes very close to getting to use it for real
source: elpasotimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
HRM Caesar Saint Augustine de Buonaparte Emperor of the United States of Turtle Island of the Absolute Dictator Party is running for president, still not as strange as Rick Santorum
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The latest health tracking metric: Morning wood
source: breakingmuscle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
How is babby formed? How girl get pragnent? They need to do way instain mother's frozen embryo from when she was 13 years old
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Versailles orifice
source: l1.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Glasgow reduces homicide rate three-fold over 10 years by switching to plastic pint glasses
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
And on the sixth day, God created dinosaurs. Don't believe me? Go ahead and ask Google for yourself
source: motherboard.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Tighten up that tinfoil and grease up your conspiracy theory blogs, the annual meeting of the Bilderberg Group is about to begin
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
To be fair, if a toothless old man drives up and offers you ten dollars and a kitten in a cooler, you might just hold out for a stranger with candy instead
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The WHO has expert advice on how not to contract the MERS virus. Hint: It has something to do with not drinking camel urine
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Now that the kids are in their thirties, Homer and Marge to finally split
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"If you are racist, sexist, homophobic or an a***hole... don't come in"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Good news: Math professor determines the final fate of MH370. Bad news: Includes a bit of geometry, specifically a 90-degree angle
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Robber's checklist: Walk in to pharmacy with shotgun. Check. Take hostages and ask for drugs. Check. Ask for recliner if you start to get tired. Check. Take a quick power nap. Check. With bonus photograph of robber after his nap
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
So, you lost your campaign to force the high schoolers to keep calling themselves 'Redskins,' but you're still worried you might be mistaken for less than completely racist...whatever can you do? Raise your hand if you have a suggestion
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Protip: When turning yourself in to police for leaving your children locked in a hot car, don't leave your children locked in a hot car while you do it
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Woman finds iguana clogging her toilet, vows to put him on a low fiber diet
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Ten women arrested in strip club sex sting after undercover cops discovered the prostitution offers first hand
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
DC area morning commute downgraded to potato
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
The Patron Saint of Fark Headline writers everywhere has passed
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Clear thinking, rational mother finally decides on the perfect birthday present for her seven-year-old daughter: plastic surgery vouchers
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 17 Columbia)
 
 
 
♪♫ The driver of the bus says, I am lost ♪♫ I am late ♪♫ Just get off ♪♫
source: abc17news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popehat)
 
 
 
"Metaphorically speaking, I hope there is a special place in hell reserved for that horrible public official on whom I am entitled to comment, purely as hyperbole, on a matter of public concern under my First Amendment rights to free speech"
source: popehat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
93 year old woman who parachuted into occupied France ahead of D-Day, scouted German positions, and sent coded messages back to the Allies finally gets her medal. Peggy Carter approves
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Do not try to suck rattlesnake poison from your son's foot, even if you've seen them do that on Bonanza
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Good news everybody. If you've been on the fence about updating your luggage collection, the airlines are about to help make the decision easy for you
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
EPA finally caves to tinfoil hat lobby and admits dangers of chemtrails
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these animals not in the wild
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Napoleon once considered fleeing to New Jersey for asylum. A cross-ocean voyage to Newark, smuggled in a brandy barrel, to live as a farmer? Ah, fuhgeddaboutit, imprisonment in St. Helena is better
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Scientists record chimpanzees in the wild enjoying alcohol made from fermented sap, thus confirming the legend of the Missing Drink
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(From the Grapevine)
 
 
 
Newest field of growth for architects: Converting somebody's childhood bedroom into an adult bedroom they can use when they have to move back in with mom and dad
source: fromthegrapevine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
This may be France's Waterloo
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Man sees face of Jesus at IKEA but can't find curtain tie-backs
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Arizona bar apologizes to transgender woman for mistaking her for a hooker, says she's welcome back any time, as long as she has a green card
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Q13 Fox)
 
 
 
Tacoma police officers buck national trend, shoot hoops with kids instead of just shooting them
source: q13fox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
Three men injured when a jet ski explodes at a Kawasaki dealership. Michael Bay in negotiations to direct the movie
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Finally, proof that allowing gay marriage will ruin traditional marriages
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Idiot jurors are going to ruin the Aurora Theater shooting trial
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
When is dumpster diving considered OK? When you're looking for your £1,000,000 lottery ticket that you threw out thinking it wasn't a winner
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Advertising Age)
 
 
 
Pepsico hints that Crystal Pepsi may return
source: adage.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSMV Nashville)
 
 
 
HOA works to improve the image of HOAs nationwide by threatening the family of a beloved local pastor who had a well-made ramp installed after suffering a stroke and multiple brain surgeries
source: wsmv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 09, 2015
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
If you happen to encounter a man with a 48 inch cock please inform El Jimadores Restaurant
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Canada: We will be free of fossil fuel within the next 85 years
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
New Jersey approves breast milk banks. New mothers pumped
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
"We're sorry that we're total douches"
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Journal (Ireland))
 
 
 
Facts about poRn all you jack-offs should know
source: thedailyedge.thejournal.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Good news, everyone who wishes X-Files/My Little Pony fanfiction existed but is too lazy to write it: somebody else totally did
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
This woman is probably not horrified enough about the unexplained appearance of 107 garden gnomes in her yard overnight
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Eric Casebolt, also known as Officer Barrelroll, has resigned
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this standing swimmer
source: img.s-msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
New Yorkers angered over Manspreader-in-Chief showing German Chancellor Angela Merkel his package at G7 Summit, take to photoshop to show their angst
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Pat Robertson to mother who lost her three-year-old child: Be happy the child is dead. He could have been the next Hitler
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Two plausible and seven completely stupid ways to avoid being bitten by mosquitoes this summer
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Sharknado may not be real, but lampreynado is a reality in Alaska
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(Yahoo)
 
 
 
CannaCamp, where guests play horseshoes, get high, eat breakfast, smoke it up, go fishing, get baked, hiking, get wasted, make lots and lots and lots of Doritos, nap
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(Deadspin)
 
 
 
There are certain questions that are nearly impossible to answer. This isn't one of them
source: adequateman.deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reviewed.com)
 
 
 
Trader Joe's is a great place to buy food - as long as you don't buy things like fruits and vegetables and seafood and sushi and wine
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(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
In Japan, births hit record low as national death toll hits record high. Officials wonder how they can solve this dilemma with robots
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(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
Flaming bird with snake in its mouth bursts out of '80s album cover to start a fire in San Diego
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(Slate)
 
 
 
Not news: Employee lunches being stolen. News: Thief is caught on hidden camera. Fark: Thief is the CEO of the company
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(Fairness & Accuracy)
 
 
 
CNN decides to cut back on its hard news (stop laughing) and become an even bigger whore for their advertisers
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(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this rustic scene
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(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Here are the world's weirdest vending machines dispensing everything from gold bullion to ... live crab?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Bob Woodward on Rumsfeld's attempt to blame Iraq on Bush: "If you look at Rumsfeld's memoir, and what the record is, and things he said on the record and hours of interviews with me, often months after the events, it's just a total contradiction"
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(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Yes, it's that emotional, nerve-wracking time of the year, when a record 70,000 NYC kids get their acceptance letters .... to Pre-K
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(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
British state school wants £1650 for a school trip to Barbados. £22 trip to local theme park got cancelled as too pricey
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(Mashable)
 
 
 
So you killed the hipster. Great. Now you've created the yuccie, a noxiously smug offspring of yuppie and hipster that will plague your bespoke coffee shops and offbeat touchdown spaces for the next decade. Thanks a lot
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(The American Scholar)
 
 
 
Why Brian Williams and the rest of us lie. Or how subby's story can gradually change from "Go Blue Devils" to "Duke sucks"
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(USA Today)
 
NewsFlash
 
White House briefing room evacuated by Secret Service. No word yet on why, because the White House briefing room has been evacuated by Secret Service
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
Sacré bleu -- ze French intelligence agencies bugged Concorde in the hopes of picking up economic intelligence as businessmen chatted on their flights
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(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Police officers, unable to figure out why they pulled a man over, decide to just sprinkle some cocaine tests around him
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(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Life under ISIS is as grim and depressing as you thought
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(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
Russia builds world's biggest helicopter. Out of horse meat (with video)
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Woman walks out of court like a boss, puts out cigarette in reporter's face
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Libsyn)
 
Audio
 
And now, an in-depth discussion of America's Wang, and the weirdos who decide to live there
source: farkcast.libsyn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Kidnapping a woman for ransom is so passé. The real action is in kidnapping a woman for being too noisy while doing laundry
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(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Alcoholics Anonymous marks 80 years since founder Bob Smith had his last drink, leaving more for the rest of us
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(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
Oh the hamanity
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Guide dog leaps in front of bus either heroically saving owner or botching murder attempt. We may never know which (switched to better link)
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(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
YAWN: Man gets busted for having a can of beer at his work station. Fark: Can of beer was actually a "Fleshlight"
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(Washington Post)
 
 
 
What happens when an unmovable asshole meets an irresistible douche? Neighborhood battles like this, mostly
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(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Number of unwanted pregnancies and abortions drop in Hawaii after public schools say 'Aloha' to abstinence-only education and 'Aloha' to actual sex-ed
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
'To be fair, it does cover all of our cat's nipples'
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(WorldWide Weird News)
 
 
 
Need a murder weapon and can't find a gun or knife? How about using a curling iron?
source: worldwideweirdnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
California Democrats support building a bullet train somewhere they don't live
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(BBC)
 
 
 
Solitary panther released
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
US Army suspends Dr. Moreau. "They are mad; they are fools," said the Dog-man
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(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Shipping container flies off tractor-trailer. One car converted to a flat bed
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(CTV News)
 
 
 
Man sues actress, claiming her intense stare through his TV caused spiritual damage. No comment from Derek Zoolander
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(BGR)
 
 
 
THIS is why guys wearing suicide vests shouldn't get into fistfights with each other
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(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Chicago police department bans knit caps, baseball hats, and, most significant of all, visible tattoos. "To be professional, we must look professional"
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ever wonder what it was like on the Titanic that fateful night it went down? Now for upwards of $500 you can find out
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man with his rope
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(Metro)
 
 
 
And the cutest thing on on the planet IS...this ugly-ass southern pudu fawn born at the Queens Zoo in New York (w/pic)
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(Twitter)
 
 
 
Caption Obama and Merkel at the G7
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(Fox News)
 
 
 
After his case dismissal and release 2 years ago, teen who spent 3 hellish years of beatings and isolation on Riker's without being charged of a crime has made his final escape through the only means possible
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(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
In response to Chinese hacking of U.S. government websites, iPhones will now require 6 digit passcode. Take that, China
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox NY)
 
 
 
While you're eating cold peas out of a can, Hamptonites are complaining about their neighbors' mansion size
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(Pix11)
 
 
 
"This is white trash at its finest"
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(AZCentral)
 
 
 
It's really cool in the movies when a car narrowly squeezes between two city buses. However, real life is not like the movies
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(Cairns Post)
 
 
 
18 critically injured after car crash and gas explosion at the Serves You Right Cafe in Ravenshoe, Queensland
source: cairnspost.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
"Einstein," the centerpiece of a $4.5 billion National Cybersecurity and Protection System (NCPS) program, fails to stop Chinese hack of U.S. government personnel files. Failure is only relative
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(Rocketnews 24)
 
 
 
Japanese dating site found to be world's largest sausage fest (Not safe for work image in article)
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(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Next time you go to an air show to watch the Blue Angels you just might go home with a cool souvenir
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(Newser)
 
 
 
Incredibly productive burglar baked potato, raked leaves, forgot to get milk
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Mon June 08, 2015
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
She's a lumberjack and she's OK
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Two thirteen-year-old girls are detained for creating a 'hit list' of 31 students and seven teachers. "The plan detailed a map of the gym, awaiting for the students to be at an assembly and bringing in small guns in backpacks"
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(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Since carnival food is dreadfully unhealthy, it's always good when you have a healthy alternative. Like a Slim-Fast bar. Specifically, a Slim-Fast bar that's been battered, deep-fried, and topped with powdered sugar and drizzled chocolate
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
So what's the worst thing about having a huge house? Not finding the dead body for a few days
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(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tech speech
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Now in Comic Sans
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(WLFI Lafayette)
 
 
 
Keep the tradition alive. Keep stuffing that chicken
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(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
"I was so amazed. Their bodies are incredibly beautiful. One thing I learned is that there are many different shapes of breasts and even genitals"
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(ESPN)
 
 
 
Apple agrees to buy a 50 gallon tub of lube for a Cleveland Indians relief pitcher, also throw in some other iGear
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(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Police spokeswoman: "The good news is that we found your cat. Unfortunately our patrol car ran it over"
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(Consequence of Sound)
 
 
 
Remember when Dave Matthews' bus took a dump on the public? Someone does, and he made a memorial
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(USA Today)
 
 
 
Only 14 years after its creation, the TSA decides to crosscheck its employees against the government's terrorist database
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(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Why you should never drink whisky on the rocks. Instead, drink it neat, perhaps with a palate cleanser of burning peat bog
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(UPI)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready headline: Drunken man in underwear wanders into Indiana home and eats chips
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Oh, help' said Pooh. 'I'd better go back.' 'Oh, bother' said Pooh. 'I shall have to go on.' 'I can't do either' said Pooh. 'Oh, help and bother"
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(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Pope Francis says the Vatican is close to ruling on whether the Bosnian town of Medjugorje has a really nasty gas leak and/or access to truly excellent shrooms, or whether the Ghost of the Virgin Mary has been miraculously appearing there
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(Boston Globe Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cleaning crew
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(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Melbourne Zoo welcomes ugly-ass newborn pygmy hippo (w/video)
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(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Your personalized license plates can say a lot about you. We're looking at you, drunk Boing Boing writer
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