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Sun June 07, 2015
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Florida's attempt to create an artificial reef goes as well as you would expect it to go
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
What is your favorite t-shirt that you own? Bonus: show us
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Haunting chalkboard drawings, frozen in time for 100 years, discovered in Oklahoma school
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lightbulb
source: media4.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
ISIS loses make believe town. Seriously
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Police looking for man who murdered someone outside a Mount Dora nightclub, though they've caught his accomplices, a talking map and magic backpack
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
A Møøse ønce bit my sister and twø øther campers
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Tribune Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these stuntmen
source: trbimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Court rules that USPS must lower first class postal rate to 46 cents. The extra three cents will be used to cover storage costs
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
Dingbat Down: Hermann Zapf, designer of the Palatino font, dead at 96. Kerning suspected as cause of death. Memorial service with be sans Comic
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
"For years, we held them back. We managed to stand our ground. But they kept coming in waves and waves...and we gave in. And now, Des Moines has its own Comic-Con. The geeks have won"
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Journal)
 
 
 
Forget your tectonic plates, and women in jeans, this earthquake was caused by tourists stripping naked on top of a sacred mountain
source: digitaljournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
For the first time, drought, water shortages become top Californian concerns. Current crisis now surpasses the usual annoyances of unemployment, taxes, cost of housing
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Peter Falk's daughter campaigning for bill that protects children's rights to visit their sick parents, and just one more thing
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Could Chicago's propensity towards collective gun violence be caused by lead poisoning? Certainly enough people die of lead poisoning from gunfire, so it's possible
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Two convicted murderers don't even need to take the sh*thole route when escaping through tunnels to get out of maximum security prison. Andy Dufresne impressed
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Another one has gone beyond Fark. R.I.P., SuperMeekrat
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Look, gastronomes, stop trying to make "veggie" burgers a thing. If it ain't got meat in it, it ain't a burger
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
FARK ready headline: 'Intolerant Jackass Act' Proponents Can Begin Collecting Sigs
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you're going to plagiarize a graduation speech, try not to use one that been viewed several million times on YouTube
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Well, it looks like ol' Sheriff Roscoe and Boss Hogg finally done got them Duke Boys somewhere outside of Richmond, Virginia
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
So let's fight crime ... with ping pong
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Single man who paid female psychic $700,000 to find him love loses his apartment, sells his car, goes broke. Apparently she didn't see that far ahead
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Amtrak train collides with a tractor-trailer carrying bacon. 70,000 pounds of casualties
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this spiritual moment
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Your Story)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Take this job and shove it
source: yourstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Israel National News)
 
 
 
The Krakow modern art museum is shocked that anyone can find an "art piece" of people playing naked tag inside of the gas chambers for an exhibit called "Poland - Israel - Germany: The Experience of Auschwitz" somehow offensive
source: israelnationalnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Two precious snowflakes learn that it's all fun and games 'til you get caught
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
And today's underachieving high school slacker accepted at all eight Ivy League schools comes to you from Fullerton, California
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Las Vegas strip club recruits recent high school graduates under the guise of stripping helping to pay for college tuition
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Well, it was good while it lasted. We're all gonna die. Yes, again
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Old & busted: Online dating. New hotness: Calling 911, bragging about your huge muscles, and asking the dispatcher on a date. Repeatedly
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming to you from Alaska's capital city, it's another round of Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Two hours of music hosted live by a farker. Tonight our host will have a friend joining him in the studio (9 pm AKDT/10 pm PDT)
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Man arrested for throwing coffee on Westboro Baptist Church demonstrators outside Beau Biden's funeral. Police won't say if the man will face charges since he vastly improved the smell coming off the demonstrators
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"You might say it's a *puts on sunglasses* novel approach. YEEAAAHHHH"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 06, 2015
(MyFox Twin Cities)
 
 
 
A school took kids on a field trip to a sex shop. Amazingly, some people had an issue with that
source: myfoxtwincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man with no penis manages to keep it a secret from his girlfriend for an entire year. Apparently it never came up
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The moral of this story is never help a shark no matter how tangled up it may be in fishing line
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this attraction
source: cbsnews1.cbsistatic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOMU Columbia)
 
 
 
The Columbia, Missouri Police Department says they can no longer dispose of prescription drugs. No word yet if it's because they already have enough
source: komu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
The D-Day landings at Normandy occurred 71 years ago today. Here is the riveting story of two first wave rifle companies on Omaha Beach
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGME Portland)
 
 
 
Totes adorable goats of Sunflower Farms in Cumberland, Maine go viral, again. And this time they're wearing pajamas: "They did not object at all. In fact, I think they relished the idea of wearing pajamas" (w/video)
source: wgme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Parents of the year candidates are arrested after their older son reported to school officials that his two younger brothers were locked in a room at home with no food or water while their parents worked during the day
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Courting a woman was so much easier in the 1980s when all you need was a roll of quarters and an available Pac-Man machine. "It doesn't really seem like that long ago"
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this guy getting to the point
source: cbsnews1.cbsistatic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
"There was an engagement ring in there that would have been John's great-great grandmother's. It survived two World Wars, but it didn't survive the American police paramilitary operation"
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Photography Is Not A Crime)
 
 
 
Protip for the police: there is a difference between saltine cracker crumbs and crack cocaine
source: photographyisnotacrime.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Egg rationing has begun in America. And that's no yolk
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
The job of the Colombian National Protection Unit is to protect people at risk of kidnapping. Their chief has an 11 year old daughter. You can guess where this is going
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
"(Drawdy) said he saw it on 'Dateline' approximately eight years ago and this is where he got the idea to steal the checks. And in the meantime, he has actually studied fraud"
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Pedo sting nets workers from Disney, Sea World, Universal, and a youth counselor who showed up to the sting thinking he was about to have sex with a 12-year-old. He arrived in a vehicle with a specialty licence plate reading: "Invest in Children"
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
People still can't decide whether to put one space after a period or two. Even teachers disagree, although the correct answer is quite obviously one
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Font frustration condition felt dyslexic test of reading Helvetica like. Subby has it
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Oh deer, rejected ugly-ass baby white-face fawn finds a new home at an animal farm
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Teacher pleads guilty to having sex with fifteen-year-old student. Farked: Is sentenced to 6-30 years in prison. Appeals sentence to state Supreme Court and wins. Coup De Farked: Is re-sentenced to 10-40 years in prison
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
And this is why you should always be nice to bus drivers
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Great Impostor charged with identity theft. Great Pretender still wearing his heart like a crown, pretending that you're still around
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Tips on living from this 101 year old Brooklyn grandma
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Another sinkhole opens up in the middle of a busy Florida street as Satan continues to get back land taken from him centuries ago
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Second wave of gentrification irks hipster dive bar owner. "Bar 107 is not the Rosa Parks of gentrification"
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Second grade students form huge line to have yearbooks signed by custodian who looks nothing like Matt Damon
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Fennel is the new kale. "Fennel is rich in nutrients"
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this smug little bastid
source: cbsnews2.cbsistatic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Signal)
 
 
 
Headline: Rocky Mountain High produces some undesirable side effects. Article: We did some research and come to find out, we couldn't find any undesirable side effects of this Rocky Mountain High. At all
source: dailysignal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Saudi Arabia shoots down Scud missile. Could a Jesus Jones reunion and another Bush presidency be far behind?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Britain's top 10 favorite cheeses. Certainly a great shopping list for Brits' next sojourn to the local cheese shop
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Stop by the "Cat Library" and check out a kitten to keep you company on Caturday
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOAT Albuquerque)
 
 
 
Nine-year-old's giant cabbage earns him a lot of lettuce
source: koat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Observer)
 
 
 
A blunt message from an old stoner to new pot smokers: "Salute your elders who smoked when it was still dangerous, and get off my lawn, yo"
source: observer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's a farking party in MN at Freddy's in Maplewood. June 6, 2015
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
(o\_/o) c= = = mlm (;_;) mlm
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Pittsburgh's transit authority uses slogans on buses like "Rockin' Rollin'," ''Movin' Groovin'," "Movin' Shakin'," and "Ziggin Zaggin," but discovers one of them appears questionable when viewed in a mirror. OOPS
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Oslo is the most white trash redneck city in Europe, according to new study
source: thelocal.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Inter Lake)
 
 
 
Most seven-year-olds want an XBox or a GoPro for their birthday. This seven-year-old wanted to ride his bike the 15 miles and 3,000 feet up to Glacier Park's still-snowy Logan Pass--and he got his wish
source: dailyinterlake.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
What's worse, your breast cancer surgeon posting pics of your boobies on the nets, or your twelve-year-old son finding those photos in a Google search at a birthday party?
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 05, 2015
(Fark)
 
 
 
Happy Friday, everybody. You know the drill. Prepare for the shaming. Behold, the Fark Weird News Quiz is upon you
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Three years ago, this kid was lured into a death chamber complete with his pre-dug grave and shot in the head by his in-laws. He lived. He set himself on fire today ... and lived again
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
In this corner of Times Square we have Minnie Mouse... and in this corner of Times Square we have Hello Kitty, let's have a full-on brawl in Times Square
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Science teacher suspended after sexual harassment claims. Naw, just kidding. He used cell jammer in class to keep kids focused on school work. "If we had parents trying to contact students ... that could have been a serious issue"
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Governor of Nebraska: I will execute prisoners just to spite you
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fairbanks Daily Newsminer)
 
 
 
One of the first things your flight instructor ought to teach you is to not walk into the propeller
source: newsminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Missing library artwork is found in: A) a house; B) a car; or C) the library
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
"Hail, Tornadoes, Floods batter Colorado" Also smoke, food shortages and the munchies. The Apocalypse starts
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
'Frisk me, I've been very, very bad, officer'
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CI News Now Peoria)
 
 
 
Authorities search for man reported missing, find armed robbery suspect instead. Yeah, it's the same guy
source: cinewsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Japanese firm sells human pillow cellphone holder because of course they do
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sputnik News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this nosy specimen
source: cdn5.img.sputniknews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wonkette)
 
 
 
Now remember, high school graduates: Stay sweet, be true to your school, and under no circumstances be Hitler
source: wonkette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
14 suspects are sought in the case of a murdered reporter who was gunned down at a bus stop by a gang riding dirt-bikes and four-wheelers. Police warn readers that the suspects are thought to be loud and obnoxious. I repeat, LOUD AND OBNOXIOUS
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Serbian farmers scoff at $209/pound artisan cheddar, offer $511/pound cheese made from 100% ass
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Get between your momma cat and her newborn baby? That's a call to 911 because she's gonna hurt you
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Dead lizard found in can of tomatoes by housewife cooking a curry, immediately improves quality of British cuisine by its presence
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Stranger)
 
 
 
Drug dealers of yesteryear had better street etiquette than the yuppie dog owners who displaced them
source: thestranger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
GoDaddy may be using "fat, neckbearded, trilby-wearing Christian" as criteria for denying job applicants an interview. In other news, GoDaddy just got a lot cooler
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Carluke Gazette)
 
 
 
Right nugget found in Scotland
source: carlukegazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Dispatch, this is Sierra Four Five. Officer down, repeat, officer doooooooooooooooooooooown
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this wave maker
source: media.zenfs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Bizarre series of events leads to a question: Who bails out the bail bondsman?
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Here's why roller coasters shouldn't crash, but do anyway
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gainesville Sun)
 
 
 
The good news is that Waldo has been found. The bad news is he is in critical condition
source: gainesville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
I am not dead. I am perfectly fine, planning a vacation and the pursuit of my hobbies. I'm feeling quite well and there is no cause for alarm
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Poor people already buy their clothes at hand-me-down stores like Goodwill and the Salvation Army. Why not have them buy their food that way, too?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(13 News Now)
 
 
 
Please note: just because they call it a 'drive-through' doesn't mean you should try it. And certainly don't burst in to flames afterwards
source: 13newsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Pope appoints the first "auditor general", a lay man answerable only to the pope himself who is free to go anywhere and everywhere in the Vatican to review finances, management practices, etc. Apparently the title "Inquisitor" had too much baggage
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Coca-Cola now makes bottles out of sugarcane. Still makes Coca-Cola with high fructose corn syrup
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Westboro Baptist Church vows to one up Ted Cruz
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
How do you deal with someone who's simply insufferable (i.e., one-ups constantly, brags about made up stuff, lies poorly, etc)?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BGR)
 
 
 
Paypal's new Terms Of Service allows them to auto-text and robocall you at will. And if you don't like it and complain, they will tell you to close your account
source: bgr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marymount University)
 
 
 
You try and rescue a drowning woman. Difficulty: She has a head injury and you have to perform resuscitation while treading water until help comes. Oh, and the water is 40 degrees
source: marymount.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Riddle me this, libs: If climate change is so bad, then why is it giving Africa desperately needed rain? Huh? HUH? Yeah, I thought so
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Actor accidentally stabbed in the stomach with a bread knife during theater performance finishes scene, says he was lucky it was a four loaf cleaver
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Is Baltimore's police force just sitting idly by and letting the drug users and gangs kill themselves? Well, if they're not hurting innocent bystanders and all it does is affect the clearance rate, is that so bad, McNulty?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
If you've misplaced a box containing sixty eight people, the Harwich Constabulary would like a quick word
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Spanish woman denied the right to sell hot property on eBay. Difficulty: Plots of land on the sun
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BGR)
 
 
 
'Moron' terrorist takes a selfie in front of ISIS headquarters, Air Force bombs it 22 hours later
source: bgr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Allowing a 9 and 10-year-old girl to fight on the playground is still a crime - even if one of them is your niece
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Couple bullied at school over their weight become bodybuilding champions. Take THAT, bullies (w/before and after pics)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this upset man
source: media4.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
I'm a politician, I'm thick skinned, but I won't tolerate being called a b*****d by a parking machine
source: thelocal.fr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
High school track coach accused of lapping a teen he coached
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
Today's Mad Libs article lead: "Fast-acting state troopers used welding gloves and a cat carrier to rescue a trio of baby raccoons from a poison ivy patch"
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Post)
 
 
 
Christian family in the ancient city of Nineveh is reportedly defending the 2,700 year-old tomb of the Jewish prophet Nahum, as the armies of terror group ISIS advance in the region and are now only 10 miles outside
source: christianpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Lawmakers shocked, SHOCKED to learn that the NFL trots out military members for the money instead of a deep sense of patriotism
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Guam legalizes same-sex marriage
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Miss Piggy will receive a feminism award. Kermit green with envy
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canadian woman finds biological father, who lives in Thailand as an Elvis impersonator
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
These period-proof underwear may eradicate the need for tampons and sanitary towels: "I have now been wearing my THINX Hiphugger for about 8 hours and no complaints. I can't even tell I have them on - which is what women want"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
"Yeah all of you 40 students might have smeared petroleum jelly, moved some furniture around, placed toilet paper in trees and wrote in soap on windows, "Class of 2015," but screw it you can be part of graduation ceremonies"
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
God rolls 1D20, smites Texas teen for... wanting a snack from the fridge
source: latino.foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
File this under "make sure first, dude"
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
It's about time somebody invented a smart garbage can that scans your trash and lets you know what you need to buy at the store
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Goodbye, Mr. Bond
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Trends)
 
 
 
There's one more advantage to owning a Tesla. No fan belt
source: digitaltrends.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Info Wars)
 
 
 
City Councilwoman disbands entire city police force after she's arrested with a gun with the serial numbers filed off
source: infowars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MPR News)
 
 
 
Sawing your neighbor's garage in half might not be particularly sane, but it is nice and legal
source: blogs.mprnews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Teacher in trouble after telling students to take selfies with their parents' sex toys
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 04, 2015
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Plumber has a pipe dream about winning big, buys lotto ticket and stuffs it behind a pipe on March 14th then forgets about it. Six weeks later, he remembers, checks ticket and collects $136M
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
A dispute over Beer Pong rules turns fatal in South Texas
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
If you guessed 5 days before another possible Denver Random Shooter incident, collect your prize in Loveland, CO
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Chinese hackers have gained access to Federal Office of Personnel Management database. Hillary's email remains secure
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPTV Portland)
 
 
 
Problem: You see a man standing in porta-potty with his pants around his ankles and the door open fondling himself. Solution: Tip it over on the door side and call police
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this gallery
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
Couple sues realtor over house infested with... NOPE
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wonkette)
 
 
 
Walmart workers: "Yay, we get to wear jeans to work now. If only we could afford jeans"
source: wonkette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Joplin Globe)
 
 
 
Because the location where the bones were found is so remote, deputies are treating this as a suspicious death. The fact that they only found half a skeleton has nothing to do with it
source: joplinglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Broadway Casts of The Lion King and Aladdin pass time during delay by doing an epic sing-off at LaGuardia Airport. Not to be outdone, Newark hosted Yoko Ono vs. Rebecca Black
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Suddenly, banana-killing fungus
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gulf News)
 
 
 
Remember how that Anthrax shipment issue wasn't really an issue and it was under control? Yeah... about that
source: gulfnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Woman spends 5 days in jail pooping out 1.5 pounds of cocaine pellets. That's no lie, that's no lie, no lie, Cocaine
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
With everything else getting a reboot these days, why not the Chandra Levy trial too?
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WOWT Omaha)
 
 
 
Nebraska state senator supports the death penalty so much that he posted a picture of a woman with her head chopped off on facebook. That'll show 'em
source: wowt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Brothels in Nevada are going out of business fast, so it's time to innovate
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Smithsonian Magazine)
 
 
 
In 1938, the New York Times wrote on the "whimsy" of California foodstuffs, including some crazy West Coast fad called the "cheeseburger"
source: smithsonianmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chippewa Herald)
 
 
 
When doing your sociology research, could you avoid committing felonies, like conspiracy to commit murder? Thanks a bunch
source: chippewa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Australian doctors banned from prescribing homeopathic remedies in hopes of diluting their inefficacy
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The Kremlin is under siege as murders plague Red Square
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this stallion
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PJ Media)
 
 
 
Lincoln Chaffee, Hunter S. Thompson, the metric system, Louis Farrakhan, the number 19, the number 34, France, French Canadians, and a Dan Aykroyd video. Welcome to Sept of the Seven-Faced Tab
source: pjmedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Maine man with GED in law motions to seal court documents, remove a news article on the arrest from the internet and to cut the arresting officer's pay $2/hr. and demote him. Also, his mom was there to help from the gallery
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Today's Healthy Florida Living tip: When being chased by vampires, dance atop a police cruiser
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week UK)
 
 
 
Tony Blair take up new role to fight extremism. I bet you thought he was still President of England. It's okay the UK still thinks the Superbowl is their local ten pin lane
source: theweek.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
It turns out Kourtney Kardashian was wrong. Also eating placenta isn't good for you
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Dear Prudence, Slate has cut back on ghostwriters, so here are a bunch of letters about relationships
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 14 Joplin)
 
 
 
Bourbon County Sheriff's Office may sell its treasured Tommy gun to interested civilian in order to raise money for modern guns. If this story sounds as if came from flyover country, it did
source: fox14tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLWT)
 
 
 
Instead of mowing the public park like any other city would do, Covington, KY brings in goats. After which they will bring in crocodiles to get rid of the goats, and the crocodiles will die off in the winter
source: wlwt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Montana man saves adorable baby moose he found next to the body of its dead mother. You'll never believe what happens next. Seriously. Dynamite is involved
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
"Amateur porn is a case of class struggle." You're only off by two letters
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Man plays "Yesterday" while undergoing brain surgery, rather than "Can't Get It Out Of My Head" which is customary for such situations
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Do you believe in UFOs, astral projections, mental telepathy, ESP, clairvoyance, spirit photography, telekinetic movement, full trance mediums, the Loch Ness monster and the theory of Atlantis and need a partner?
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
The two best days in a boat owner's life are the day he buys the boat and the day he sells the boat. The worst one, however, is probably the day he gets crushed between the boat and his car by a burning Cheverolet
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Marijuana consumers in Colorado looking to stock up their stash should mark their calendars for September 16th this year: "This one-day break from pot taxes will likely never happen again"
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Fancy-shmancy NYC hotel kicks customer out for dress-code violation since she was wearing a Navy uniform and not the customary high-dollar streetwalker look favored by fashion industry cognoscenti
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Man attempts to set world record for the worst proposal ever
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"We've seen this story before -- an employee is hooked on drugs and steals from his boss," said Prosecutor Mark Lindquist. "The twist here is the boss is a world famous artist"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
Someone has rewritten a law barring bars from opening up next to day care centers, the one place you'd need them
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Preliminary NTSB report of Philadelphia Amtrak crash finds the train was in perfect working order and the tracks in good shape. The problem apparently started when the two somehow got separated
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHSV Harrisonburg)
 
 
 
Let it be known that in the Great Deer Uprising of 2015, they came after our children first
source: whsv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Detroit, long known as America's crime and murder capital, hopes to lure tech start-ups away from Silicon Valley. It's good to dream, Detroit
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Slightly dodgy poem prompts run on sales of fainting couches
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
We all thought Hitler was teetotal - but someone just found the Führer's stash of brandy and champagne in the cellars of his new restaurant
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Having banned mankinis in the town, Newquay police turn their attention to... human traffic cones
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Ukrainian PM warns of impending "full-scale invasion" by Russia. America immediately sends over all copies of Red Dawn to train the Ukrainian people. WOLVERINES
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ProPublica)
 
 
 
Europe's prison policy: wonderful and sophisticated, except for that thing where France keeps releasing the guys who spent their terms screaming about making the streets run red with the blood of the infidel
source: propublica.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NASA)
 
 
 
Photoshop this chute
source: nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cheddar Valley Gazette)
 
 
 
Wanted: Dirty Harry type to clean up filthy town that has gone to the dogs
source: cheddarvalleygazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Can a spinster ever be truly happy or fulfilled without a man or children in her life? Controversial new book says women who've never wed should treasure their freedom
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Wait just a second, are you trying to tell me The Cheesecake Factory's Louisiana Chicken Pasta is one of the unhealthiest chain restaurant meals in the country?
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
Woman charged with running over seven people with her car. Hopes to pickup the split on acquittal
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
In one Texas town, a Dunkin' Donuts franchise shares the same shopping center as a local BBQ shop that sells breakfast tacos. And the Dunkin' Donuts franchise is running scared
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Michigan Prosecutor on ransacking a medical marijuana provider's home and keeping her stuff: "The ladder was just as much a part of this operation if she used it to reach the top of her plants"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Relax, everybody. Josh Duggar's sister was only 5 when he sexually assaulted her. So it's not like she remembers it or anything
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
The man who organized an anti-Muslim protest in front of a Phoenix mosque admits that in the end it was a pretty stupid idea. "This whole thing did blow up in my face"
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Ninety-one-year-old man who always wanted to know what it was like to smash through a garage door finally gets the chance to find out
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Taco Bell responds to local demand from finicky Chicago millennials, will offer beer, wine and mixed alcohol freezes in select 'hoods. What red goes best with a Chalupa, one wonders
source: chicago.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
Park rangers to bear: "Eat Shih Tzu and die"
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 526: "Airshow" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 03, 2015
(Business Insider (Australia))
 
 
 
Because Australia isn't deadly enough already, a killer walking fish that can live out of water is on its way
source: businessinsider.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
South Korea tests missile capable of reaching deep in to North Korea. North Korea responds by upgrading to Photoshop CC
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Gazette)
 
 
 
Fabulous: A Chick-Fil-A to donate food to the Iowa Gay Pride Parade
source: thegazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Connecticut Post)
 
 
 
Search for missing swimmer in a pink swim cap suspended after Coast Guard rescues balloon
source: ctpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
"I watched my best friends Brent and Bill, murdered right in front of me as I myself was stabbed in the stomach and had my throat slit multiple times, and I didn't mind at all"
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop these happy friends
source: orig09.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Mom ODs on heroin and facial warts while cooking kids dinner
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Jesus Christ it's STILL a LION! Stay in the car. AND KEEP THE WINDOWS ROLLED UP FFS
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
We are the 30%
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida: where the fish are fish, the teenagers are teenagers, and the teenagers are occasionally smacked unconscious by the fish
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stamford Advocate)
 
 
 
Congratulations, Bridgeport, CT, you're the worst destination in America for a summer vacation. Whew, lucky they told me, hope there's still rooms available in Newark
source: stamfordadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(El Pais)
 
 
 
Good news: Activists have revived an organism thought to have died out in Europe. Not so fast: Activists are anti-vaxxers, and the organism is diphtheria
source: elpais.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"Tragedy today, as Queen Elizabrth was eaten by wolves. She was delicious"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
In an attempt to up the "redneck factor" of the lottery, Indiana debuts Bacon Scent Lottery Tickets
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Florida man, who makes swords for a living, committed hotel rewards points fraud to get gift cards for Applebees. That's a lot of work just for some mozzarella sticks
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Every 'kiss' begins with 'Kay', but every 'NYC police steal dead man's credit card to buy diamond ring at Zales' begins with 'NYC police'
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this downtime
source: media.zenfs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Corroded seals refurbished to original condition
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Made-for-Fark headline: "Drunk hedgehog found covered in booze, unable to explain where he'd been"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Warrants issued for several parents for the crime of cheering on their kids at their high school graduation
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Amazing camouflage artist makes himself invisible in unlikely places. Either that, or he's actually a Predator and we're all boned
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Gandalf and Dumbledore to be married in front of Westboro Baptist. No word on the levels of outrage expected once they start playing with each other's wands
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Home Depot: You can do this. We can OWWW stop that
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBTV 3 Charlotte)
 
 
 
It's kind of fascinating to watch a four-foot snake swallow an entire whole egg. Just not in your own kitchen
source: wbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
The human body is buoyant. It can float. Unfortunately, so can a casket
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Meet the curmudgeonly investigative reporter who brought down Sepp Blatter, told FIFA to get off his lawn
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
Godzilla given official citizenship by Japan - shame he's still not allowed into the US after that unsavory incident in 1998
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ProPublica)
 
 
 
Red Cross raises half a billion for Haiti...and builds six houses with it. In other news, Red Cross names Sepp Blatter as new CEO
source: propublica.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
"We will still be the most lethal fighting force the world has ever known even if our belts don't match for the next few years"
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
Drones are the newest weapon in the fight against Chinese exam cheaters
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this decorated pair
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
And then, there's "so drunk you set up your own fake DUI checkpoint"
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
That's some hare
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Old and Busted: the ice-bucket challenge. New Hotness: the hold a can of Coke between your boobs challenge (not safe for work pics)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orange County Register)
 
 
 
Rare ugly-ass oarfish washes ashore on Catalina Island, well just check it out for yourself
source: ocregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Father accused of losing his shiat because his son wasn't potty trained
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
You can get a grand jury to indict a ham sandwich. But even the most skillful attorney can't get one to indict a 33-year-old yoga teacher of drunkenly performing oral sex on a 15-year-old boy at a Bar Mitzvah party
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
Mother accused of mailing marijuana to jail inside a Bible. Holy smokes
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
This seal is carrying a sensor to help scientists study the seas near Antarctica, and he seems pretty pissed off about it
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
France is trolling Francis. Will they get a bite?
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
In an effort to fight extremely underage drinking, governor blocks bill that would allow baby pictures on beer bottles
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Someone is covertly choking chickens in South Carolina
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bradenton Herald)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "Manatee teen pregnancy emerging from the shadows"
source: bradenton.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Yes Virginia, Georgia's open carry law DOES extend to the world's busiest airport. You can even bring your AR-15
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Antique store claims to have Eva Braun's panties for sale, says they're guaranteed to raise a fuhrer
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue June 02, 2015
(Alice 97.3 San Francisco)
 
 
 
Controversial new drug referred to as "Viagra for women" under FDA scrutiny. The drug, called "red wine," allegedly increases a woman's libido
source: radioalice.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVQ Billings)
 
 
 
If the photos aren't good enough, you're not close enough--and Yellowstone's bison will definitely tell you when your photos are really, really good
source: ktvq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Pilot unaware of midair collision until after landing, when he found himself parked on top of the other plane
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Oxford U's Vice-Chancellor thinks Americans overreacted to 9/11 because they aren't as resilient as Brits. Which explains that tame and balanced reaction to Northern Ireland and the IRA
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this NASA Orion spacecraft thermal window inspection
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
School kitchen manager fired for giving lunches to hungry children without money
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
The infidels will bow in terror at the almighty power of Croutons
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Being a negative nancy may have a downside
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Bruce Jenner's transition into Caitlyn Jenner is a sin against God on par with molesting children according to -- well, THIS is awkward -- the pastor who runs the church that the Duggar family attends
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
Border agents seize 3,500 pounds of marijuana hidden in lettuce truck, but suspect it's just the tip of the iceberg
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
There's no telling the shenanigans a terrorist would get up to if he had access to a Massachusetts CVS
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTUU Alaska)
 
 
 
Now we know how reindeer can fly
source: ktuu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Army Times)
 
 
 
Fashion superpower unveils its Fall 2015 lineup. Verdict: Muted earth tones are in; velcro is out
source: armytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Four injured by fawlty rollercoaster at Alton Towers
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Another reason to pull your damn pants up
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DNA Info)
 
 
 
Step on a crack break your mother's back. Step on a NYC sidewalk grating.. fall 20 feet down a hole and seriously hurt yourself
source: dnainfo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Midwest avian flu outbreak causing egg prices to eggsplode
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Don't Mess with Texas...........Geese
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Here are 100 eggcorns that pass mustard
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(When On Earth)
 
 
 
Photoshop this engineering feat
source: whenonearth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
♫ Let's go fly a kite, up to the highest height. Let's go fly a kite and send it soaring. Up through the atmosphere, up where the air is clear, oh... Oh, OH HOLY CRAP
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Here, we see a newly discovered marsupial, known for suicidal, 14-hour-long sex sessions. And across the ridge, we find a standard Farker, who is winded after 3 minutes of sex
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
A couple whose rat-infested garden has been piled high with junk for five years have been branded the filthiest in Britain. Their response? WooHoo we're #1
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Protip: there's a difference between dental health and mental health. We're looking at you, mister dentist's office masturbator
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ever seen a pigeon's genitals? ISIS is worried that you might
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
You can stop worrying about those mysterious aircraft flying over U.S. cities and spying on people. It's just the FBI
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Today)
 
 
 
Benjamin "Bugsy" Siegel: Bootlegger, gangster, builder of casinos, Nazi hunter ... wait, what?
source: historytoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Heavy)
 
 
 
TSA calling in fake airline threats today to cover up for their embarrassing DHS review
source: heavy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
"Yeah, so one of our cops beat a dude up and now we're out a bunch of cash. Meaning that you, the taxpayer, are out a bunch of cash"
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Was I wrong to praise a police blotter?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Bad - you're being taken to the hospital in an ambulance. Worse - the ambulance hits a bus and flips several times
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
After massive security failure, TSA tells its acting director to remove shoes, hat, all government ID
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
Hello, class of 2015. 2/3 of you are bad and you should feel bad
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Police: Performing a sex act with a McChicken sandwich is gross and disturbing, but not necessarily illegal
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WorldWide Weird News)
 
 
 
Woman charged with driving under the influence ... of whipped cream
source: worldwideweirdnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these divers
source: cbsnews2.cbsistatic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Negative, Maverickski, the pattern is full
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Hamas basically admits that they refuse to rebuild parts of Gaza and deliberately keep the residents there poor as an open air zoo for the world media, governments and leftist groups
source: elderofziyon.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Sometimes the only way to stop your drunk mom from driving everyone to the store to get outfits for the sixth-grade graduation is to punch her in the face
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Don't you just hate when you're on a driving lesson and your car gets run over by a tank?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
If you're in prison and decide to be your own attorney during your murder trial, don't whine to the judge that your incarceration has presented obstacles in gathering and reviewing evidence you need to prepare your defense
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Today's unfounded freakout for preppers: Obama's taking away our wood-burning stoves
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Yeah so we're sorry that we didn't get a hold of you over the last 10 years to let you know that your daughter is in our foster care system. It's awesome that you reached out. There's just the small matter of a $7,800 bill. So yeah
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(EuroNews)
 
 
 
Belgium asks, "Who the fark still uses a payphone?"
source: euronews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Woman ordered to serve two weeks behind bars for having outrageously loud sex: "Gemma started screaming and shouting whilst having sex, which woke us up. This lasted ten minutes" (w/pic of Gemma)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Family forced to flee from house when can of deodorant explodes and sets kitchen on fire. Investigators ask them all to raise their hands if they're sure
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 46 Atlanta)
 
 
 
Colorado high school principal stops valedictorian from speaking, outs him to parents
source: cbs46.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Why did London's last wild colony of hedgehogs cross the road? They never did, and that's why they're still live hedgies
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Thirty-year-old support worker loses half her body weight after giving up 1,095 candy bars per year habit, starting the Cambridge Weight Plan: "I'm saving up money I would have spent on chocolate to see my dad in Florida later this year" (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Luis Obispo Tribune)
 
 
 
How an $85 traffic fine will cost you $499, even if you pay it on time
source: sanluisobispo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Hey FEMA: Not to tell you how to do your job, but if you schedule a meeting with homeowners about the massive flood damage to their homes, it helps if you actually show up for the meeting
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Happy hours may soon again be legal in Illinois
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Northwest News (Seattle))
 
 
 
As the Western drought continues, whitewater rafting companies are adapting to lower water levels. The new model seems to be an inner tube with a beer cooler tied to it
source: nwcn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
You're all alone at the funeral home saying goodbye to the last of your loved ones and you're all alone in the world now except for Lulu the comfort dog who's there by your side in case you need her
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Your cat is infecting your body with parasites while you sleep. "I don't think we can take it for granted anymore that these parasites are sitting in our heads for the rest of our lives doing nothing"
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon June 01, 2015
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
The latest product to be delivered by bicycle in NYC? Mattresses. Seriously, no springs attached
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Blaze)
 
 
 
And America's most atheist city is also its most anti-homeless. Gentlemen, raise your colanders to Seattle
source: theblaze.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
I'm stuck to my bike. I'm so very scared. Help (not safe for work)
source: uproxx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this view
source: cbsnews2.cbsistatic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Fark your earholes with FarkCast
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFBay.ca)
 
 
 
Wackos inundate California town after city council outlaws space-based weapons. Mayor Butt calls for calm
source: sfbay.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Haven Register)
 
 
 
Visiting a quaint New England town for your friend's wedding? Locals don't cotton to your big city, pooping on the shelves at the Rite Aid, ways
source: nhregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Softpedia)
 
 
 
Muslim woman denied can of soda on an United Airlines flight for fear she could go Mentos
source: news.softpedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Northwest News (Seattle))
 
NewsFlash
 
Either Godzilla's waking up, or there were just a bunch of earthquakes off the Oregon Coast. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: nwcn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
You had one job. ONE JOB
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Woman riding her bike 4,600 miles starting in Denver, Colorado and ending in Anchorage, Alaska to raise money for the Colorado Nepal Alliance's Earthquake Relief Effort. "It seems more fun than riding across Kansas"
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Another parachutist injured at Skydive DeLand, as DeLanding continues to be the source of the problems
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A new viral craze is sweeping across Korea; EVERYBODY PANIC
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Meditating 'energy healer' discovers that everything in the cosmos is interconnected, especially the lake and her Hyundai since she didn't set the parking brake while meditating
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Want to save water in the California drought? Put in a pool
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Congressional intern arrested for exercising constitutionally-protected right
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Murder suspect claims he is innocent because he doesn't like pizza. Which is absurd. Who doesn't like pizza?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News24)
 
 
 
Jesus Christ there's a lion in the car
source: news24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Ancient cave paintings
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
I'll see your 'college students build free artificial arm' and raise you 'high school students build artificial arm.'
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Two million new people have moved to Florida in the ten years since a hurricane last made landfall in 2005. Some people think this will not end well
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
What's scarier, finding some drunk stranger in your bed when you get home or knowing that there are people out there that would take a selfie anywhere?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Solar plane grounded by clouds
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Getting totally wasted on a plane, stripping naked and urinating on Dolph Lundgren is no way to go through life, son
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Loud noise linked to weight gain, according to a recent study at Buffalo Wild Wings on Super Bowl Sunday
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Turkish President Tayyip Erdogan: "Hey opposition, if you can find my golden toilet seat I will resign"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Eva Braun's underwear may have been found in a Ohio thrift shop
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Help! Subbing for AP Honors Law teacher today, they are working on Moot Court Oral Arguments I'm up shiat creek because I'm a choir teacher
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Police say a teen stabbed a man in the chest and arm before leaving him to die after an argument over what? A) Money. B) Drugs. Or C) A cellphone
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Family accuses Petco of turning their Golden Retriever into a Dachshund dog because of groomer error
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Who's addicted to what and from where? No, Hentai is not a category and your mom's basement is not a region
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
During a tour stop in Israel, the Backstreet Boys decided to get baptized in the Dead Sea because they're as important as Jesus
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Journal)
 
 
 
The Patriot Act has officially expired and NSA phone spying is dead at least for a couple days. Who are you going to call on Phone Freedom Day?
source: nationaljournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
An end to a touching story at Neverland Ranch, FIFA doesn't have enough pressure on Blatter to go, and Hooters waitress wants to put her organ into a male customer for a change: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 5/24 - 5/30
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
"Smash and grab" jewelry thieves lead police on a merry chase through a shopping mall. And yes, there's video
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop this train rider
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Blogger mom is outraged that police won't allow her children to swim in a polluted creek filled with sharp rocks in the middle of a nature preserve. "What business does the state have telling responsible parents how to do their job?"
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
The Big Book of British Smiles has a new centerfold
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Send a quart of cow manure in the mail to a neighbor in response to a lawsuit over your barking dog? That's a misdemeanor charge of third-degree harassment, a possible 30 days in jail and a $625 fine
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBTV 3 Charlotte)
 
 
 
CATS schedule changes take effect Monday. Instead of sleeping for 5 hours and getting up to eat before taking another nap they will now nap 6 hours and play for a bit and maybe get some lovin' after eating
source: wbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
22-year-old Alabama man bludgeons mother to death after an argument about grades. Police have no information on which high school the man attends
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Carrion luggage found at Tokyo train station
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
"They were my heroes today" Lee said. "They were able to get one right away and then after a lot of creative thinking they got three more"
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
College says Dennis Hastert's name is no longer associated with its Center for Economics, Government, and Public Policy
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Yorker)
 
 
 
Vermont becomes the third state to ban philosophical exemptions to vaccinations, joining West Virginia and Mississippi in the 21st century
source: newyorker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Man cuts his daughter, stabs self in the neck at McDonald's. Probably after finding out what really goes in to those burgers and chicken nuggets
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The French conservative party UMP, whose members are apparently are just about as bright as American conservatives, officially change their party's name to "The Republicans"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)