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Sun April 05, 2015
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Sacramento, California tries to break the Easter egg hunt world record. And since this is Fark, you know how well that went
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If your kids ask you how the Easter Bunny is able to leave eggs in houses all over the world on the same morning, show them this story and explain what 'meth' is
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Here's how to play breakfast Jenga. All you need are some thick-cut fries, stacked and then drizzled in melted American cheese and bacon. Then, you top it off with a fried egg (pic)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these technical experts
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Not news: Jihadist traveling from Norway to Syria to join IS. News: More than one in ten come from the same street in a sleepy little backwood town. Fark: They used to be the town's potheads until they found radical Islam
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
Judge shows douchebag that revenge pr0n is a site best served with 18 years of cold, hard time
source: utsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this gyroscope geek
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MyFox Twin Cities)
 
 
 
"Can you tell me why I'm being arrested?" a friend asks in the video. "Because I feel like arresting you," the officer replied
source: myfoxtwincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
"Heroin" has replaced "Murder" as the #1 cause of death in New York
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Indiegogo)
 
 
 
Here's George Takei's response to Memories Pizza's crowd fund. You know you want to
source: indiegogo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Why can't we fix Easter weekend so it falls at the same time every year?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
A new synthetic designer street drug called flakka is unleashing maniacal paranoia, rage, and delirium on the streets, just like bath salts did before this insidious creation
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
"We have prayerfully considered your request that the Church return all or part of this donor's gifts and tithe monies, and must respectfully decline to do so"
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Pop Quiz, Easter edition: How many Peeps stacked on top of each other would it take to reach the top of the Space Needle?
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Theatergoer claims Cobb Cinemas discriminated against him and his big Cookie Monster bag just because he's a grown adult male (w/ pic and video)
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Once again, if a headline ends with a question mark, the answer is always "no." Or, in this case, "No, you mouth-breathing moronic conspiracy freaks"
source: blackbag.gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vocativ)
 
 
 
They say that "fake it till you make it" is good advice when trying to learn on the job. This, however, is not good advice when working in law enforcement. Especially if you aren't really a cop
source: vocativ.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
What's wrong with just making a really nice stew? Is that wrong? Should I not have said that?
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this apparent dust lover
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Grub Street)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: First Dates- the good, the bad, and the ugly
source: grubstreet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Clash over $1.4 billion telescope at sacred Hawaiian site intensifies. With "artist rendering" of said 'scope that looks like it was Photoshopped by subby's nearsighted 12-year-old cousin
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
For centuries, dancing and loud music have been banned in Germany over the Easter weekend. If only there was someone, someone with fabulous hair and an insouciant grin, who could do something about this
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Just in time for Easter, UK prisoners at one jail are receiving Kinder eggs filled with surprise drugs from the Easter drugs bunny sent over the fence from magical tennis ball launchers
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Enjoying your chocolate Easter eggs? Then you're a bad person and should feel bad
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
TV telethon posts generous $32 donation from Hugh G. Rection
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
Coast Guard checks out substance in water near Cleveland. Evacuations ordered when the substance was identified as Lake Erie
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
There are those who cry over spilt milk, and then there's Tesco
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Keep renting that chicken
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
France passes law requiring models to eat a sammich
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Baby boomers were such terrible parents they have ruined every subsequent generation
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCRA 3 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Naked and holding a towel is no way to rob a convenience store, lady
source: kcra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Surprise crash landing. As if there's any other kind
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOV9 Steubenville-Wheeling)
 
 
 
To be fair, who hasn't slit their husband's throat and claimed they were dreaming of filleting fish?
source: wtov9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat April 04, 2015
(Above the Law)
 
 
 
Not news: Law professor sends link for her students to read. News: It's a video on Pornhub. Fark: featuring anal beads
source: abovethelaw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flyer Talk)
 
 
 
And you all thought that allowing portable electronic devices on board aircraft was a good idea
source: flyertalk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Nitrous oxide - aka "hippie crack" - is now second only to cannabis as the drug of choice for teenagers. Stop laughing
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
"Residents of a small southeast Alaska town no longer have nighttime access to emergency medical care because the border with Canada is now closed at midnight"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Instant Carma
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
North Korea launches successful attack on their old foe, the sea
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
Who's Van Halen's best front-man? The results are in. It's David Lee Roth by a nose
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Grimsby Telegraph)
 
 
 
Idiot 'trying to have sex' in ambulance punched paramedic preparing to take 92-year-old to hospital
source: grimsbytelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop these fashion statements
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Colorado House passes bill allowing transgender people to get new birth certificates
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Selling figurine soldiers in Nazi regalia at Moscow's most renowned children's store? That's possible charges of inciting hatred and undermining the dignity of veterans of World War II
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Meet the most violent prisoner in all of Britain. His stats include being in more than 120 prisons, holding at least 11 hostages, more than half a million pounds in damages and only about four months and nine days out of prison since 1974
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wales Online)
 
 
 
Kickboxer explains that burglar who broke into his house at 3 a.m."found the wrong guy in the wrong place." The burglar had to be told few times
source: walesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Parents are shocked, SHOCKED that a student who wrote a blog where he wrote stories about murdering other students was let back in to school because the school found the blog to be a work of fiction and protected by the First Amendment
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
South Carolina student suspended after photo of her writing racist epithet goes viral. No punishment announced yet for vertical photo taker
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
There is no such thing as a ticket quota
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Sea plane. Sea plane crash. Crash, plane, crash
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this stylish hat
source: i.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Here are 6 everyday foods that have killed somebody. #4 would be an average female's dream death
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Couple whose home has a 200,000-plus light display learns you can't unscrooge City Hall
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Manchester Evening News)
 
 
 
Old school: Mutiny on the Bounty. New school: Mutiny on the Qatar Airways flight
source: manchestereveningnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Los Angeles has invented a better parking sign, which can confuse people no matter what language they speak
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"Britain's Isles of Scilly is seeking a new constable for the world's most cushy police posting. Qualifications include knowing how to deal with wandering sea pups, catching speeding golf cars and saving goldfish"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Just when you finally got over the fact that some people carve better jack-o-lanterns then you do, here are some magnificently painted Easter eggs
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
"Early morning, April 4. Shot rings out in the Memphis sky; free at last, they took your life. They could not take your pride"
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Newest version of Oregon Trail released in 32 U.S. states and Puerto Rico
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
What happens when you let elementary school kids design ice cream flavors
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
The buyer of a homeless shelter who arranged for all homeless to be taken aboard buses to unknown destinations "up north" revealed to be none other than the town itself
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Refinery29)
 
 
 
"Curiously, the Internet offers up slim pickings when it comes to recipes for cooking pythons"
source: refinery29.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Texas police help round up loose buffalo. Onlookers say they haven't seen a team of Texans take down a buffalo like that since Super Bowl 27... or 28
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
A real-life 'Fault in Our Stars' couple discovers hospital red tape is even sadder than the book and movie
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Independent)
 
 
 
Giggity giggity
source: independent.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man accused of taking his friends on a joyride in a stolen Maserati, going 185
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 2 Fort Myers)
 
 
 
City to remove trees from median. Florida: Because someone might drive into them. Florida^2: They're not removing the light poles between the trees
source: nbc-2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
No, yoga is not a religion, says judge. Clearly under the influence of Kundalini
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Honestly, who puts peeps in a craft beer?
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Wapo asking the tough questions that really matter. Like: Why is the White House Easter Bunny always so creepy?
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Penmanship is a dying art, much like spelling, grammar, and witty repartee
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
You think dealing with old baby boomers in the office without being able to punch them is bad? Try dealing with office millennials
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Not news: Long Island high school senior accepted by all colleges to which he applied. News: All 8 Ivy League colleges
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Sorry Buddhists
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Winners all around at Queens casino. Payout will be sweet, sure bet
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sad Guy
source: pbs.twimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Central Jersey)
 
 
 
Teaching your 16-year-old to drive? Lesson 1 - This is the brake. This is the gas
source: mycentraljersey.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Because nothing impresses the ladies quite like taking them back to your home that you built with low-cost materials for only $500
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
If you're on trial for murder, telling the judge you're a robot isn't going to help things
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Feline survives a 17 day, 3,000 mile trip from Egypt to Britain locked in a shipping container with no food or water. Sinbad the sailor is just fine and looking forward to a relaxing Caturday
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
How come everybody is always searching for the lost city of Atlantis, but nobody cares about the lost city of Paititi?
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Ever get so tired of waiting in line at a theme park that you want to shoot yourself?
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Women, please leave the time traveling to the men. We are more likely to make the right choice of killing Hitler
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Harvard Business Review)
 
 
 
Shoppers who bring reusable shopping bags to supermarket buy more junk food than those who don't, likely as subconscious treat to themselves. 'I don't think people are actively thinking, "I'm using reusable bags, so I will get some doughnuts"'
source: hbr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
To get away from it all, hipster A-list celebrities, supermodels, and millionaire playboys take their vacations in Uruguayan fishing village you've probably never heard of
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 03, 2015
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
12-year-old boy discovers world's biggest NOPE in Tasmania
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Eurasianet)
 
 
 
Georgia residents are both staunchly Orthodox Christian and fans of American culture, which is why they have deemed Dunkin Donuts "fasting doughnuts" permissible for Lent
source: eurasianet.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Clear your desks, it's time for the Fark Weird News Quiz. Might as well take off those pants, too
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Dirt)
 
 
 
Senator Feinstein: It's time to start censoring the internet
source: techdirt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this attention whore (sfw)
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Orleans Advocate)
 
 
 
Escaped murder suspect recaptured because he failed to plan for one of the most treacherous realities of life on the run: laundry
source: theneworleansadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCHS Charleston)
 
 
 
Pop quiz, hot shot. Your airplane is smoking but the nearest landing is West Virginia. What do you do? WHAT DO YOU DO?
source: wchstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
It's not a random act of kindness. It's a toomah
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
What are you doing for Good Friday? This guy nailed it, hands down
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
Study finds cigarette smoke makes you stronger, well that is if you are the MRSA bacteria
source: utsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 News Dallas)
 
 
 
Crane becomes new sculpture exhibit at Dallas Museum of Art
source: fox4news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The coolest Fabergé eggs made out of cake that you'll see today
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
"And in other news, there is a traffic alert at I-74 and John Deere Road due to cattle roaming the freeway"
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this hair-raising moment
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
California now getting second hand smog from Asia. Which means that if you are in L.A. and go to Chinatown, even the pollution is now authentic
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washingtonian)
 
 
 
America's only gay gang is in Washington DC, and Steve Buscemi wants to make a movie about them
source: washingtonian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Pipeline company to 100 West Virginia landowners: Don't you folks think your land would be improved if it had one our pipelines running through it? No? Oh, well, that's what eminent domain is for
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Veteran's prosthetic eye stolen from his car. When asked why he left it in the car, the vet could only say he was trying to keep an eye out
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
This is why checking the spam folder every now and then isn't such a bad idea
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
GE: We set good things on fire
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Townhall)
 
 
 
Nigeria's new president promises to crush Boko Haram. Because if anyone knows about crushing people down, it's a former brutal military dictator
source: townhall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Cancer vaccines soon to become a reality. Anti-vaxxer heads to asplode. Win, win
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TaxProf)
 
 
 
Ex-IRS ethics office lawyer disbarred for ... ethics violations
source: taxprof.typepad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man digs under house and finds 5,000-year-old underground city, barrels of Old Toby and hairy feet
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Police leave note to say sorry for raiding wrong home
source: edinburghnews.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Judge rules a court battle over a giant emerald can proceed, no word on if a blue hedgehog still wants his claim on this valuable object
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Pug named Dug was bitten in the face by rattlesnake, expected to survive. Is now "brother to a snake," and knows his life's mission
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
After 20 years of non-stop running to the toilet, a man has discovered the number #1 source of his discomfort
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(96.1 KISS)
 
 
 
Pig stand-off at Burger King gets extra weird when employee tried to feed the pig bacon
source: 961kiss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Sailor who was lost at sea for 66 days rescued by Coast Guard. No word on the condition of his volleyball
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Network World)
 
 
 
The first iPad was made available in stores five years ago today, thus revolutionizing the way we view porn
source: networkworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you're going to pay $450 for a phony doctorate degree, you might as well pony up the extra $100 to graduate Summa Cum Laude
source: charlestondailymail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Easter egg cocktail hunt is like a fun family game, but with more vomiting, falling over and blackouts
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
New York chapter of the Boy Scouts of America becomes first in history to hire gay adult employee, immediately earns a merit badge of defiance
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Yes, but would you want to order a pizza with custard creme, mud and old shoe topping?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dezeen)
 
 
 
Dutch engineering student to oceans: Clean yourselves up
source: dezeen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Because you're not spending enough on your engagement and wedding as it is, you now need a pre-engagement party and rings
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man dies during sex with scarecrow he dressed in lipstick and long-haired wig
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Apparently if you were born outside the U.S. and your adoptive parents didn't bother getting you citizenship, you can be deported when you're 40
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this walk with a view
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Three utility workers killed in Rube Goldberg-esque crash caused by 93 year-old man
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Buffalo State SGA has no sense of humor and freezes campus newspaper budget because of April Fool's day edition that 'reported' on drone strikes on the administrators and Gov. Cuomo banning snacks
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man spends £10,000 on a bathtub for his girlfriend that's filled with melted chocolate, hopes that's just a Snickers floating to the top
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBTV 3 Charlotte)
 
 
 
For the 2nd time this season, a counterfeiter matches wits with that eagle-eyed crime fighting organization, the Girl Scouts Cookie Brigade. Guess who won
source: wbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SILive)
 
 
 
In 2005, radiation levels 200 times normal were found across 265 acres of a national park due to contaminated fill used in the 1940s. A decade later, nothing has been done to clean it up
source: silive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(8 News Now)
 
 
 
A woman got a $200 ticket for putting on lip balm behind the wheel because the state trooper said it fell under "distracted driving"
source: 8newsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News and Star (UK))
 
 
 
28 time world gurning champion dead at 67. With helpful pic of what gurning is
source: newsandstar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
I'm a little tea pot, short and stout, fill me full of pee, and watch the rout
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Top 12 spring-cleaning hacks to save you time and money. #13: Not cleaning also saves time and money
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KREM Spokane)
 
 
 
Seattle SWAT execute no knock warrant. Shoot no one. In fact, they don't even wake the baby. No, really
source: krem.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Because who wouldn't want to live in a steel shipping container. In Phoenix. In the summer
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
If you're going to work as a valet parking attendant, it really helps if you know the difference between the gas and brake pedals, especially the ones in a $600k Ferrari GTO 599
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Wow. Who'd imagine that posing with £250k in cash and bragging about your drug dealing on Facebook would lead to your arrest?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
How does he smell?
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Headline Fail: Tragic student dies on route to handing in final piece of coursework after being struck by car
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Doctor claims that he was driving drunk because he had dislocated his shoulder at a party and needed to get medical help. Fark: Judge agrees, lets him off
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man claims he caught chlamydia from a car. Who knew its transmission was that easy?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Utah man finds over $22,000 in a bag in the middle of the road and returns it to the owner
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bit9)
 
 
 
Can we trust Washington to balance online privacy with cybersecurity? (Sponsored link)
source: blog.bit9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 02, 2015
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Let's take a look inside this old abandoned toy shop? *Jackpot* A treasure trove of Star Wars, Barbies and Action Man collectibles
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
Indiana clarifies the RFRA. Sexual orientation and gender identity is now protected under the RFRA. So, I guess you all feel pretty silly now, don't you?
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
What do you do when your llamas get too exhausted to walk? Call a taxi
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this calm skier
source: media4.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lancaster Online)
 
 
 
The new marijuana concentrate, "shatter" is 6 times stronger than regular shadoobie
source: lancasteronline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kare11)
 
 
 
Zombie dog wants steeeeaaaaak
source: kare11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(13 News Now)
 
 
 
We understand that jail can be boring, but you should probably find ways to pass time that don't include attempting to extort politicians
source: 13newsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The Cuddly, Fluffy, Surreal World of Angora Show Bunnies
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Bad: Woman tells her friends she is dying of cancer. Cool: Her friends shave their heads, get tattoos and raise $7k for her. FARK: She made it all up
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
Man asks permission to rob house
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Poutine Pizza, because nothing will bring Chicago and New York together like a common enemy
source: mtlblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
In response to Indiana's RFRA leglislation, Salesforce.com is offering its Indiana employees relocation packages if they wish to transfer to another state
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Couple sues after sperm donor isn't all he's jacked up to be
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Food Nut)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Do you prefer recipes that include rabbit, hard-boiled egg, or peeps as ingredients for your Easter/Eostre/SpringFeast festivities? Wait. I know. How about all 3. Mmmmmmm
source: simplyrecipes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Pat Robertson seems to have first hand knowledge of the planning of gay weddings and he may be right
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Independent)
 
 
 
News: sink hole appears on Dublin street. Fark: caused by disused nineteenth century, underground tunnel, from government buildings to brothel
source: independent.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this shooter shooting shooters
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
According to US military officials, the reason US air strikes were needed to re-take Tikrit is because the Iranian forces previously spearheading the attack sucked at coordinating attacks and their artillerymen couldn't hit the broad side of a barn
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC11 North Carolina)
 
 
 
No charges in Snow Kone Joe vs. Mr. Ding-a-Ling ice cream fight
source: abc11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Puppy survives epic 248 mile journey while stuck in the grille of a car, inspiring adoration from the driver and epic jealousy from all the other dogs who could only stick their heads out the windows of their cars
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Televangelist Robert Schuller's hour of power hits the 60 minute mark at 88
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
CNN is reporting that the moon will disappear over North America just before sunrise Saturday
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WAVY Virginia)
 
 
 
Protip: there are safe places to buy guns, but Bob's Psychedelic Gun Shop is probably not one of them (pic)
source: wavy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
FACT: Google has turned us into insufferable know-it-alls. FACT: Google makes you think you're smarter than you actually are. FACT: Bears eat beets
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
The designer of the new Honda Civic evidently had the same boyhood Hot Wheels collection as subby
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
What do Disney princess movies really teach little girls? A) self-reliance B) the power of love C) a burning desire to conquer the earth
source: explodingunicorn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MPR News)
 
 
 
Minneapolis debates great question of our time: One sailboat, or two? "The 13 full-time members of the City Council hold most of the power, and they sometimes have a tendency to micromanage"
source: mprnews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Jesus takes time out from His busy Easter schedule to appear on hot cross bun
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Turns out that not all 13-year-old girls on the Internet are FBI agents. Some are 15-year-old extortionists who want to trade your ween pics for iTunes giftcards
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Russian fishing trawler sinks; dozens of electronics technicians feared dead
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Truth About Cars)
 
 
 
If I Drove It: 26:28 And The End Of Automotive Journalism -or- How a couple of car guys pulled off the biggest hoax in modern automotive journalism history
source: thetruthaboutcars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The most derided profession in academia? Humanities professors
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Hipsters proclaim ordinary hipster beards OVER, $200 colored hipster beards in, to amusement of stylist: "The dyed beard is so hokey, it's like signaling there isn't anywhere left to go, she said"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Porn star accused of forcing wealthy man to pay the gay away
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Replica pirate ship breaks down and has to be towed to port. Crew members heard saying they should have been ninjas
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Portland Press Herald)
 
 
 
Judge: "I know you spent nearly seven years of your time and millions of dollars in investors' money salvaging a ship, but with a fraud investigation ongoing you lose the rights to trying to salvage it"
source: pressherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Florida Man arrested standing outside in his underwear, yelling expletives at his neighbor and his neighbor's young daughter and touching himself in a sexual manner... Psh, dumbasses, that's not underwear, that his uniform. Florida Man
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Wife puts cheating husband on lifelong sex ban but still lives with him: "I might not want Kev, but I don't want anyone else to have him either"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Fake army vet wearing fatigues while panhandling runs into real, live vet: YOU TAKE THAT UNIFORM OFF (w/ video to boot)
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Syracuse Post-Standard)
 
 
 
Dear Duke: You suck, but I will be attending you anyway. (Or not)
source: syracuse.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Massive power outage causes widespread chaos in Turkey on Tuesday. Apparently people weren't expecting it since their usual power blackout days are Monday, Wednesday and Friday
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Cafe offers free dessert to customers: four giant waffles, 12 scoops of ice-cream and 5,000 calories. Only two people have finished it and they probably have diabetes now (pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
The University of Oregon creates position of "Assistant Vice President for Sexual Assault." Evidently the Dean of Vice and Amoral Behavior" was overloaded
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this escort service
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Insane religious group tries to shame women who gave birth via c-section, because the only scars Jesus likes are episiotomy scars, or something equally as stupid
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Terrorists attacking students in Kenya. Is it Thursday again already?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Multiple aborted landings and touch-and-go's at Düsseldorf airport at 55KT crosswinds, or how to turn a commercial airliner into a STOL aircraft. On an unrelated news, local retailers record an unprecedented surge in underpants sales
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Dog gets four prosthetic legs, can now make it on his own to get steak
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Man blames watching too much porn for trying to record upskirt videos at Seattle Pride Parade. Too much porn? That's unpossible
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Please come take this car out of my life. I want to start dating women again (now with imgur copy since original was removed)
source: imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Good: McDonald's is going to give pay raises and paid vacation time to its employees. Bad: Only 10% of their employees will be eligible
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Magazine)
 
 
 
It is spring. The rain is falling, the flowers are blooming, and the spiders are getting faster
source: news.sciencemag.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Teacher's science experiment demonstration of smashing a cinder block with a tool gets him the axe
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KLTV Tyler)
 
 
 
Legally blind woman given license to drive after special glasses help restore her eyesight. And now she can see that you all drive like MORONS
source: kltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(From the Grapevine)
 
 
 
How can we hope for world peace if nation's can't even agree on what are the best toppings for a pizza. Tuna fish, Germany? Really?
source: fromthegrapevine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
One year later, still no reefer madness in Colorado: "Tourists from around the world step into the cannabis store to buy small amounts of legal, and heavily taxed, marijuana. It goes on day after day after day with virtually no muss or fuss"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
Mother says although there was meth in the home with her children, the sex offender and ex-con who hung out there made sure the kids never touched it
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
This 116-year-old woman is the world's oldest living person. She lives in Arkansas and dreams of meeting Barack Obama
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
Jewish Federation gives out hams for Easter. There are at least two bewildering things about that headline
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
What's worse than being caught masturbating? Being caught masturbating while looking at women inside a Walmart. What's worse than that? Getting charged with damaging property with your bodily fluids
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Isn't it wild when you walk into a restaurant high on psychedelics only to discover the guy sitting at the table next to you is actually the Governor of Alaska?
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
A woman wearing a T-Shirt with the phrase 'dropping a load' did exactly that at a Wisconsin Kmart
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(680 News Radio)
 
 
 
Good news: drunk driving deaths are down for 7th straight years. Call and text your friends about how safe the roads are
source: 680news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTFark)
 
 
 
The first rule of Kentucky fight club is choose your weapon: chicken or bra
source: ora.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 517: "Ugly-Ass Baby Animals" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 01, 2015
(The Poke (UK))
 
 
 
In case you forgot, an April Fool's Day roundup 2015 for those who appreciate English humor
source: thepoke.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
California has one year of water left
source: on.msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
The latest thing that's bad for you in large quantities: Iced tea
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
If you've already kicked the deputy in the groin, it really doesn't make any sense to offer him oral sex
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(If You Only News)
 
 
 
Someone bought the openly anti-gay Indiana pizza place's domain name and made it look TOTALLY gay
source: ifyouonlynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop this macaw
source: img10.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Bad: Having to ride the bus. Worse: Your driver is reading a newspaper
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Richmond.com)
 
 
 
Officials determine that substantial number of signatures on forger's petition to be on the ballot might be forgeries
source: richmond.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press-Enterprise (So. Cal))
 
 
 
A child, who is home alone, foils burglars ransacking home. You know, this would a great premise for a movie
source: pe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Camden cop says he played with his creamer at Starbucks because of PTSD
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 17 Nashville)
 
 
 
Guns don't kill people. Cats, on the other hand
source: fox17.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Florida, home of that bastion of Christian purity known as Spring Break, decides maybe people living in sin don't have to go to jail
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Six things you didn't know about marshmallow Peeps
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Science)
 
 
 
Your dog may want steak, but your cat wants George Handel
source: popsci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
In what is likely to be viewed as an April Fool's Day spoof, Greece reveals their master plan after exiting the Euro: Bitcoin
source: greece.greekreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Wednesday: Two Ryanair planes collide while taxiing. Thursday: Ryanair introduces "Crash Experience Surcharge"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
ISIS in Yarmouk near Damascus. Picard confused
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Muddy Buddy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this timid testing
source: nztravelorganiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ylakeland.com)
 
 
 
Car lanes, check. Bike lanes, check. Swan lanes, check
source: ylakeland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
"We never should have taught the pandas how to fly"
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Phone scammers claiming to be IRS agents call a TV producer who's worked on stories about that same scam. Doh
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston Gazette)
 
 
 
How many laps does it cost when you get your baseball coach pulled over for kidnapping and net him a speeding ticket?
source: wvgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Spokesman from Red Lobster would like to point out the sharp side pain was not caused by their delicious Cheddar Bay Biscuits™ but by a prior stabbing
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(West Fargo Pioneer)
 
 
 
If you drive 10 mph under the speed limit there's a 50% chance you're drunk. So hit the gas. For the children. For yourself. For society
source: westfargopioneer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scribol)
 
 
 
Welcome to Bolivia's Road of Death. There's not enough money in the world to pay me to drive that route
source: scribol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Mayor uses a sander to remove floor wax from tile in the city bomb shelter. Mesothilarity ensues
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Early humans didn't grunt to communicate - it's only us that have worked out how to do that
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
You ought to know better than to bring a bra to a ceramic chicken fight
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Man has fathered 40 children by 20 women. Degree of difficulty: not an American professional athlete
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Tiny song bird can fly the Atlantic, finally explaining the presence of coconuts in Europe
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Teenager who received transplanted heart sadly did not receive any farks to give
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smithsonian)
 
 
 
Wonder Woman's invisible jet is a feature display at the National Air and Space Museum in Washington DC. Today only
source: blog.nasm.si.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Western Morning News)
 
 
 
This takes 'try before you buy' to a whole new level
source: westernmorningnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Second £1m lottery win for lucky Scoonthorpe couple
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Study: Giving kids alcohol could lead to early drinking
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Florida, where you take out your child's tooth with a Camaro
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Homestar Runner)
 
 
 
Just in time for Aprilween, a new Strong Bad email
source: homestarrunner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: I have a promising career as a biomedical engineer, and I work with my brother, who is a janitor. I'm now being referred to as The Janitor's Sister by higher-ups. Should I pretend I don't know him for the sake of my career?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
The teenage son of the Canadian Consul General learns diplomatic immunity doesn't work when you've killed someone over a drug deal
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Deadbeat dad who told reporter he 'died' in a car accident and couldn't pay child support sentenced to two months of purgatory
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Truth About Cars)
 
 
 
New Cannonball Run record: NYC to LA in 26 hours, 28 minutes. Multiple tags including Dumbass, Asinine, Cool, Hero, Sick, and Unlikely fight for the privilege of wearing astronaut diapers over enormous brass balls
source: thetruthaboutcars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Booble street view
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Is The Pope a Catholic?
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HitFix)
 
 
 
Patton Oswalt throws himself out of the running for future Daily Show hosting gigs
source: hitfix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Ꭾooǫlɘ'ƨ Aqɿil ᖷoolƨ Ⴑoʞɘ iƨ qɿɘƚƚy ʇunny
source: com.google   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Grand Forks Herald)
 
 
 
University of North Dakota needs a new nickname, Farkers need something to do besides work. This seems like a no-brainer
source: grandforksherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
World's second oldest person moves up to number one
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
You're a rotten parent if you lie to your children by telling them there is an Easter Bunny, but instead of putting sweets in their Easter baskets you fill them with non-candy alternatives
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this inside job
source: 3.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
May seventy-six trombones welcome the Church of Gay to Indiana
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
U.S. mercenary syndicate Blackwater: Screwing missions up and taxpayers over since 1997
source: fortressamerica.gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Please do not defecate on the bike path. Use the grassy areas on either side
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
Chips and Salsa. Serious Business
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Richmond.com)
 
 
 
Again gangstas, keep your finger OFF the trigger until you get it out of your pants
source: richmond.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
That's not a pot roast. THIS is a pot roast
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Anne Frank determined to have died earlier than previously thought from typhus, likely from the water...water...water
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
'70s Rock star passes, we'll take it for granite they'll barium in a sedimental ceremony
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
UberX is just the same as Uber, except the driver will burgle your house after dropping you off at the airport
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Freakonomics)
 
 
 
Religious people are actually preventing innovation after all. Suck it, atheists
source: freakonomics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It's getting to the point where cops can't even Taser a suspect without it blowing up in their faces (warning: graphic)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Police in Alabama have turned into the Cobra Kai Dojo
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Discovery)
 
 
 
Someone did DNA testing of what the "protein" in the most popular US pet foods is: "The major finding of the DNA analysis was the abundance of proteins from 'unspecified animal species' - or 'mystery meat' - in 14 of the 17 tested products"
source: news.discovery.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
County Attorney in Arizona to a Vietnam veteran after learning the man is a recreational user of marijuana: "You're violating the law and I have no respect for you as someone who would try to claim that you served this country and took an oath"
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Words you don't want to have in a news story about your death - "wounds to the rectal area"
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby owl shows up on woman's doorstep. Complete with awwwwww-inducing video
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Your dad was a great man. And he died doing what he loved. Being naked and lying in the middle of a golf course
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 31, 2015
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Navajo Nation to impose first junk food tax in country
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Scientists have isolated the bacteria that makes your armpits smell
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
The world's largest sperm bank has relocated next to a college campus in order to give their target donor base easier access
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Couple takes RV cross country on a slow news day
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(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Pop-quiz, hotshot: Kidnappers take you and a friend to a remote location. There you're given the choice to either kill your friend or be killed yourself. What do you do? WHAT DO YOU DO?
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(BizPac Review)
 
 
 
Disarm NYPD movement seeks to create "no cop zones" throughout the city. Didn't John Carpenter do a movie about this 30 something years ago?
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(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this big-mouthed photo bomber
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(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Taking a cue from Lex Luthor, a Russian analyst is calling for a nuclear strike at the San Andreas fault line. As well as Yellowstone National Park
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Scottish soldier, who had recently returned from Sierra Leone and served in Afghanistan, is unable to make it out of Miami's Ultra Festival alive. We've lost too many good men down there, dammit
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(Newser)
 
 
 
What you usually get from your fellow drivers: the finger. What a Maine woman got: a kidney
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
World's worst rush hour is Istanbul, not Constantinople. So while you are speeding through Constantinople, I'll be idling in Istanbul
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Manhattan woman fatally walloped by flying plywood. Bonus: Article actually uses the phrase 'fatally walloped'
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lehigh Valley Live)
 
 
 
"Hello, officer. Fancy meeting you at the convenience store this fine evening. Lovely weather we're having. Why yes, I AM doped up on heroin, thank you for asking"
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop yourself into a historical photograph
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(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Amazon introduces "easy" buttons for buying more products from Amazon. Go ahead, push the little button. You know you want to
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Alabama mom will never win the Parent of the Year award with this attitude
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Some things from the '80s are still good: A Flock of Seagulls, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Super Mario Brothers. Note that this list does not contain that box of hot chocolate in your cabinet, Grandma
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(UPI)
 
 
 
And thus ends the most exciting thing to happen in the Santa Monica Mountains since that unfortunate Boy Scout Jamboree back in '96
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Turns out Florida Man is neither faster nor more powerful than a speeding locomotive
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Today)
 
 
 
Ugly assed newborn jaguar cub makes his debut at the San Diego Zoo, immediately freaked out by Jack Hanna. Then again, who isn't?
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(The Drinks Business)
 
 
 
Ever been so drunk you tried to resuscitate a rubber dinghy? This man has
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(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Millennials: I know you're trying to declutter, mom, but I really can't use your 14-foot leather sectional in my 475-square-foot apartment
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(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Dear parents, When giving medicine to your kids, a spoon for tea is not the same as a teaspoon. Sincerely, American Academy of Pediatrics
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Coffee shop employee "accidentally" clicked on a spam email while at work, resulting in the company's Facebook page becoming a porn stream
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
Airline passenger leaves "touching" note to pilot in which she thanks him for not killing her and everyone on board by flying the plane into a mountain
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
US military to hold exercises in Ukraine "just because"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
So why DO we dye eggs for Easter? Here come the theories
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Experts identify ultimate cause of Germanwings disaster: it was the Nazis
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tiara on someone who needs an image boost
source: blogcdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
The good news: Somebody finally moved into that vacant building next door in your New York City neighborhood. The bad news: It's coyotes
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
There's nothing more adorable than a wanted felon arguing he has an inalienable right to grow marijuana and protect his crop with a sawed-off assault rifle
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(UPI)
 
 
 
Want to see a perfectly executed PIT maneuver to stop a suspected DUI driver in an SUV? California Highway Patrol gives a textbook demonstration on the 101
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
The risk of living in a state with its own Fark tag is that you never know when you're going to walk into your son's room and find a naked burglar lying down next to him
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
If you injure yourself on croutons, you probably deserve that $2000
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Man killed by falling tombstone while hanging Easter decorations at the family gravesite with his wife. Well, at least it was a convenient way to go
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
We're not saying that global warming is the Devil's work, but swarms of flies never seen before in Alaska are being documented there thanks to the state's freakishly warm winter
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(When On Earth)
 
 
 
As the War on Terror approaches its 15th year, never forget that the shortest war on record lasted 38 minutes
source: whenonearth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
How it feels to be circumcised as an adult. Thanks for the tip
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
LBJ was obsessed with his dick. Aren't we all?
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Orlando)
 
 
 
"A public library is not a suitable place to have a shrine to the Confederate States of America"
source: myfoxorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Turn left onto demolished bridge then proceed to your final destination, a fiery death, on right
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Judge gets pissed off when attorney refuses to waive speedy trial for his client. "If you want to fight, let's go out back and I'll just whoop your ass" Attorney: Challenge accepted. Judge: Punch. Attorney: How ya like assault charges?
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global Times (China))
 
 
 
South Korea annoyed that China and Japan are attention whores when it comes to cherry-blossom hoopla, declare that those nations' cherry trees are in fact Korean. And so began the Cherry Blossom Wars
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(WTFark)
 
 
 
Police raid classic pot and pizza parlor. Police point out that "You'd have to be high to put pineapple on pizza." (With Scrimshaw guest hosting for WTFark)
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(MSN)
 
 
 
Kid receives a joke "cry baby" certificate from his youth centre basketball team, and predictably, social media goes nuts. Not so predictably, the kid is fine with it and his mom says everyone needs to relax
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Mon March 30, 2015
(NPR)
 
 
 
The creation of the religious right and the birth of Supply Side Jesus
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOAT Albuquerque)
 
 
 
Man shot when two motorcycle clubs get into a fight at an Applebee's. Wait, Applebee's?
source: koat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Windsor Castle staff holding strike vote, will soon see the violence inherent in the system
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(NPR)
 
 
 
California's death row, the nation's largest, runs out of room. You know, there's a solution for that
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
McDonald's will be testing a 24-hour breakfast menu in several markets...just not yours
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(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Just for future reference - If you re-aggravate a neck injury while riding a roller coaster, the court will rule you're 60% at fault. So your payoff will only be $1.5 million
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: 'Ello, guvna
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(WPXI.com)
 
 
 
Teacher arrested for obsessively stalking 11-year-old girl via text message, homework sheets. "Alcorn hid her phone number on a math worksheet by telling the girl to dial numbers that had been circled"
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(Thrillist)
 
 
 
Photoshop these incredibly strong soldiers
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(CNBC)
 
 
 
Give a h00t, vote for W00t - stout, that is (round 2)
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Taxis are supposed to get you to where you need to go fast, but it shouldn't be because the police are chasing him for a possible DUI
source: philadelphia.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
In Rod We Trust (not safe for work)
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Journal)
 
 
 
Two federal investigators were just arrested for stealing bitcoin... while investigating criminals who use bitcoin
source: nationaljournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Alabama Political Reporter)
 
 
 
What they don't teach in Med School: Doctors who commit malpractice must then get elected to the state legislature so they can repeal laws named after their dead patients
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(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
Former spokesman for Missouri Auditor Tom Schweich follows his boss's footsteps in the worst possible way
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: Create an ad for a new show on the History Channel
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(Medium)
 
 
 
Payday lenders: "Hey, at least we're not the mafia"
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(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Grandma not included
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(Metro)
 
 
 
Idiot who walks his dog by having it run behind his car named "the laziest pet owner on earth," tied with every other halfwit in your town who does the exact same thing
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(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
If your cunning plan involves snatching the Girl Scout money box from the kids selling cookies in front of a store, then jumping into a getaway car, you may want to rethink your career plans
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(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Malls across new Hampshire hosted a special event for special-needs children in an effort to provide seasonal trauma for all
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(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Mass exorcism of schoolkids leaves dozens in hysterics as priest attempts to 'banish the Devil.' Church spokesman said: "We haven't received any complaints so far, so there's no problem" (pics of problem)
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(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Investigators find that the co-pilot who deliberately crashed an airliner in the Alps had previously undergone treatment for suicidal tendencies, but it was years ago, so it didn't raise any black flags and he was considered a minor threat
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(The Peninsula (Qatar))
 
 
 
Miami Beach celebrates its 100th birthday. Which still makes it four years younger than the average Miami Beach resident
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(NBC News)
 
 
 
Apparently God is as effective as a co-pilot as Andreas Lubitz
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
New research shows that while treadmill desks do score quite high on the "smug douche" factor, their "actual exercise" score is much lower than expected
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(CNN)
 
 
 
How Yemen could spin out of control. Uh....well...more out of control. Like in a bad way
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(Daily Mail)