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Sun September 14, 2014
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Gas station clerk uses mop to fend off armed robber. Stanley Spadowski approves
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Not news: Chicago man uses drive-through at 7-Eleven. News: it wasn't a drive-through until he got there (pics)
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Why I hate people or why we can't have nice things. DIT
source: i.chzbgr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"This was a vehicle owned by the National Crime Agency, the so-called 'British FBI,' put in place to fight the likes of terrorists and serious, serious gangsters - and yet they don't seem to have grasped the basics of crime prevention"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: update this old telephone
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Cameroon jails people for drinking Baileys, arguing that only homosexuals enjoy Irish coffee
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
"Since they were erected on the I-595 in March, drivers have hit the new warning gates a total of 105 times." Perhaps the warning gates need warning gates
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Walter White she's not. High school chemistry teacher arrested for various date rape drug "recipes" as well as possession of meth, GHB, and other drugs. "She was really nice. I think she was a good teacher"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Just what is it about the Islamic Jihad that attracts white female Midwesterners to the cause?
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
For their first mission, Al Qaeda's new branch office in India mistakenly stormed a Pakistani frigate thinking it was a U.S. aircraft carrier. In other news, Al Qaeda in India is looking for a new branch manager
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Democrat)
 
 
 
California nudist camp accused of stealing water. Police aren't saying how they carried it off
source: dailydemocrat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Winner of World Garlic Eating Competition downs 33 raw cloves in 60 seconds. "He came to the contest alone, which is just as well"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yandex.ru)
 
 
 
Photoshop this overhead beach view
source: img-fotki.yandex.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Man-eating leopard targets drunks walking home; has killed 12 so far. "I'm sure you won't taste any better because you've consumed liquor," says an expert. Well, yeah -- that's why they're called beer GOGGLES, not seasoning
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Indy Channel)
 
 
 
When you run an after-hours club where 4 juveniles were shot less than a year ago, converting it to an illegal gambling den and adding a sign that advertises it as a thrift store is unlikely to avoid police scrutiny
source: theindychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
"We are winning the war against the giant snail invasion"
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KnoxNews)
 
 
 
What can you do when police insist that the aspirin powder in your pocket is cocaine, arrest you, publish your mugshot, force you to pay for a defense attorney, then the DA quietly drops the charges? Nothing. You'll get over it (paywall added)
source: knoxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Someone in Britain has managed to steal an entire cricket ground: "The ground is described as about 450 x 550 feet in diameter, grass covered and possibly muddy"
source: pleasantdinners.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Did you know some students who go to vocational school want to learn rather than sit around all day doing nothing? The superintendent of Boston schools didn't
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
California man held in Pyongyang allegedly had the "wild ambition" of doing hard time in a North Korean prison so he could check out the human rights situation. For the next 6 years, North Korea will be happy to oblige
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Hurricane Odile headed for Baja California. What a croc
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Django Unchained actress "detained" and cuffed for kissing husband while black. Fark: That is exactly what happened. Ultra-Fark: That is exactly what happened. Obvious: That is exactly what happened (Some Not safe for work content in article)
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Liverpool Echo)
 
 
 
Liverpool hospital emergency rooms swamped with hundreds of Brits suffering strange bites from exotic and feared insects known as "mosquitoes"
source: liverpoolecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
School prohibits student from wearing pro-abstinence shirt to school because not having sex isn't in line with the school's views. Welcome to Slut High USA
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Caption this street crosser
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KUTV Utah)
 
 
 
Cops fish four vehicles out of Utah reservoir and leave a fifth for next weekend (with pictures)
source: kutv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Onion-theft story has a sweet ending as donations bloom
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pacific Standard Magazine)
 
 
 
Comfort foods are a myth. Turns out, the feeling of euphoria you get from eating that hot fudge sundae is as empty as the calories
source: psmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFAA Fort Worth)
 
 
 
Community concerned because train tracks could eventually carry trains
source: wfaa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this low...ride...er... ♪ ♫ ♬
source: 33.media.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Man upset because neighbor is stockpiling old tires in his backyard. Sounds like he's not having a good year
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
We interrupt this week to bring you a freak snowstorm in Wyoming, South Dakota, Montana and Colorado. We now return you to your regularly scheduled September
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Remember Vancouver's hard rockin' devil statue? It could be coming back for an encore (sorta kinda not safe for work, eh)
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Do not want? No, Want
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global Post)
 
 
 
Apple: Anyone can screw up a map of Canada, all tucked away down there
source: globalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cryptozoology News)
 
 
 
Woman's home invaded by mysterious blue lights: "They are not reflections, they move unrelated to the camera, they move when the camera is still. They move faster than the camera, though many seem to be straight, they're not all straight" (w/video)
source: cryptozoologynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KVAL Eugene)
 
 
 
Bats begin exacting their vengeance on musicians. Thanks a lot, Ozzy
source: kval.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Zima ztill being zold--moztly to Japaneze schoolgirlz
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Navy suspends search for missing F-18 pilot in western Pacific, CNN vows to keep speculating
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
This little piggy went to market, This little piggy stayed home, This little piggy had roast beef, This little piggy had none, And these five little piggies stayed at the Colorado jail while their owner went home
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
This just in, Ben & Jerry's to begin airlifting ice cream to western Africa
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCTV5 Kansas City)
 
 
 
When it absolutely, positively has to be there overnight (not valid if our driver crushes himself)
source: kctv5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
You may not believe this, but it appears that whole Ebola thing may be having an adverse effect on Africa tourism
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun News Network)
 
 
 
Man allegedly feeds ex-girlfriend's dog to her. Scott Tenorman feels her pain
source: sunnewsnetwork.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Microsoft co-founder donates $9,000,000 to prevent the spread of Ebola to Seattle
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat September 13, 2014
(Salon)
 
 
 
Teachers hate standardized tests too
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Bay Area)
 
 
 
Ballot initiative to create six Californias fails, because frankly, even one California is too many
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Q: Do mobile phones cause cancer? A: Maybe, if it's an iPhone 6
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
So, we're genetically engineering mosquitoes to spread cures now. This should end well
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Pope Francis says the globe is embroiled in a piecemeal World War III. And he's right
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Fabulous news, everyone: Study finds religious groups now more accepting of homosexuality
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
ISIS turns the rare triple-header play
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Yes. Goodbye
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Farker is having a bloody mary competition tomorrow -- give me your best recipe, what do you put on the rim of the glass, and what are your favorite additions?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Central Somerset Gazette)
 
 
 
Ex-soldier gets six-figure sum after army gives him the cold shoulder treatment
source: centralsomersetgazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flying skateboarder
source: media2.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Scientist)
 
 
 
Woman warned not to give anyone a piece of her mind
source: newscientist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Not having a college degree is a bigger barrier to employment than ever before, except for all of the Farkers to the right who went into IT at 16 and are earning six figures
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
It's all fun and games 'til you use your three-year-old daughter to shoplift items from Walmart in order to sell them for drug money
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CityNews Toronto)
 
 
 
The real reason Canadians always seem so mellow: a staggeringly large percentage are doped to the gills on high-dose opioids
source: citynews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS San Francisco)
 
 
 
The San Mateo and Napa County Sheriff's offices would like to know if you have any idea what they did with a couple of their assault rifles
source: sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABL13 Houston)
 
 
 
On second thought, calling your in-flight WiFi hotspot, "Bomb on Board" wasn't so amusing after all
source: abc13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KKTV Colorado Springs)
 
 
 
New York and New Jersey LEO's join massive PA State Police manhunt. Vegas odds on captured alive are 250,000/1
source: kktv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Foodbeast)
 
 
 
So, who's ready for funnel cake cupcakes
source: foodbeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Principals in the Chicago Public School system upset because janitorial work got privatized and now their schools are full of trash. They're also upset with the lack of cleanliness
source: politics.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mascot knitting an ascot
source: mlblogsbensbiz.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Paralyzed man stranded in the ocean floats six miles after falling off his jet ski and treading water. Doctors say that Bob is expected to recover
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gladstone Observer (Australia))
 
 
 
Not to be outdone by the U.S., Australian social services go all out using "shields, helmets, assault rifles, the mother and father taken from their beds, shaken from their beds, handcuffed naked, children marched out at gunpoint"
source: gladstoneobserver.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Indiana Gazette)
 
 
 
Judge explaining why he dismissed DUI case: "Hey, trooper, I hope you understand. ... I'm catching some heat from [district attorney] Linda because that is her nephew." Attorney general to judge: You won't be so lucky
source: indianagazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)
 
 
 
PA State Trooper dead, another injured in an ambush attack at Pike County barracks. Update: A "person of interest" is being questioned
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
Four Crimean combat dolphins with possible kamikaze training have been relocated to therapy centers to treat serious children's diseases as "cerebral palsy, mental disorders and psychological stress"
source: rt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox NY)
 
 
 
New study says physically active kids do better in school. That's the theory for now, until researchers can actually find some physically active school age children
source: myfoxny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(This Is The West Country)
 
 
 
Here's what police dogs look like when they're still rookies (pics)
source: thisisthewestcountry.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fredericksburg)
 
 
 
Man arrested for breaking into a house to steal 25 rolls of toilet paper. I thought Mr. Charmin seemed a bit old to break bad
source: news.fredericksburg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IBN Live (India))
 
 
 
Old and tired: Losing a plane. New and unique: Losing a train
source: ibnlive.in.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
US steps up lynx protection, but still fear the Game Boy will drive it to extinction
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
A bicycle is a poor getaway vehicle after you've grabbed $2,000 from a crippled old man leaving the bank
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Shipwreck from 1899 discovered in Lake Superior. Gordon Lightfoot busy trying to find a word that rhymes with "Nelson"
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
This year marks the 200th anniversary of the writing of The Star-Spangled Banner, 199th anniversary of people butchering it and taking 20 minutes to sing the last verse
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: Improve the NFL logo
source: walls-world.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Cow gives cat a tongue bath. Oh, sure, it's okay for a cat, but the farmers always shoot at me
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Just in time for Caturday: Farktographers invite you to lolcat this thread full of kittehs
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Cuba sending hundreds of doctors to help fight Ebola. Apparently, the cure is somewhere in the trunk of a 1965 Chevy Impala
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Woman with a gun threatens 11-year-old boy for playing the clarinet. Though had it been bagpipes, she would have been completely justified
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WOWK Charleston)
 
 
 
We have simple rules in West Virginia. Two of which are don't show up drunk or bring a gun to a high school football game. And certainly it is frowned on to do both at the same time. We try to do better than Florida
source: wowktv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Woman outbid on her dream home plays some silly pranks on the new homeowners, cancels their mail and invites random men over for rough sex with the wife
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Three-year-old boy with incurable cancer says there is only one thing he wants for his birthday next week. He would love to receive some letters in the mail as nothing makes him happier. Come on Fark, Let's give this boy a happy birthday
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Meet the Silver Dragon, a ten foot wave in the middle of a river in China, that you can surf
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri September 12, 2014
(Foodbeast)
 
 
 
Southern Comfort unveils their new Gingerbread Spice flavor
source: foodbeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wonkette)
 
 
 
Maybe you really should be afraid of strong conservative women. Apparently they can cost you your job
source: wonkette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
Grandmothers everywhere are tagging themselves as Grandmaster Flash due to Facebook's autocomplete feature
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
San Diego cabbies cry foul over body odor test, say it unfairly targets people who smell bad
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Tesco supermarket: We're all out of walnut bread, how about some octopus bread?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPTV Portland)
 
 
 
Woman caught on camera stealing footstools off peoples' front porches. Authorities suspect she may be trying to create her own ottoman empire
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Virologist screams "Airborne ebola!" in a crowded theater
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vocativ)
 
 
 
Kidnapped by ISIS: a rare survivor describes his 40 days in Hell
source: vocativ.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this unusual accident scene
source: media1.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Doctor in isolation in Nebraska says he's at 80%. Unfortunately the other 20% is still Ebola
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Seaside Heights, NJ, smashed by Hurricane Sandy in 2012 and burned by a boardwalk fire in 2013, is now being overrun by clowns
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Always on hand with helpful information, the missing plane network informs readers that they will not need raincoats for the upcoming solar storm
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Then, George Zimmerman asked, 'Do you know who I am?' and threatened to kill him
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Surgeons have long believed that playing classical music during surgery helps them concentrate. This violinist offered to help. During her own brain surgery
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Navy gives the Missing Plane Network something to talk about
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 46 Atlanta)
 
 
 
"Bill. Bill. Junk mail. Bill. Package of meth"
source: cbs46.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
According to new reports, in 2007 the US Government strong-armed Yahoo into turning over data on both people who still used their service
source: america.aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Healthy lifestyles becoming in vogue across the hip-hop spectrum, as more rappers are promoting tossed salads and vitamin butt (not safe for work language)
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Drue)
 
 
 
Here you go, wolves, I'm baring my soul
source: drueroberts.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's back, and not a moment too soon: The Fark Weird News Quiz. * Doctors warning: Do not attempt to complete the Fark Weird News Quiz without alcohol
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yandex.ru)
 
 
 
Photoshop this group takeoff
source: img-fotki.yandex.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Good news bed-wetters. Your constant fretting about Ebola and ISIS and the knockout game have convinced people that civil liberties are for suckers
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
The Department of Defense wants Sheriff Joe Arpaio to return all the surplus military weapons and equipment they've given him over the years
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Journal (Ireland))
 
 
 
Café announces strict no-hamsters policy. Hairy faces, vegan diets, always looking for attention... you know the type
source: thedailyedge.thejournal.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Channel 3000 Madison)
 
 
 
2000 Ford Taurus station wagon vandalized. FTA: "This hot rod of a car of mine seems to attract petty thuggery, obviously due to envy"
source: channel3000.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Other than anesthetized, the 10 best states to have babby
source: blog.sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Haaretz)
 
 
 
43 intel reservists refuse to serve over "Palestinian persecution," use of AMD processors
source: haaretz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Gotta catch'em all
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Sperm donor dies of a heart attack after making his fourth deposit in a week. He was making money hand over fist
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Paisley parked
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Bone your way to heaven scheme ruled not kosher by Israeli authorities
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nefarious Plots)
 
 
 
15 years and 300,000 posts: Explore trends in Fark's archives with this searchable visualization
source: nefariousplots.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Loch Ness Monster spotted in England, continuing his eternal quest for tree-fiddy
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
As the humans drone on with their yapping about the so-called important things going on around the Internets, the REAL important battle of the cats and the sloths rages on
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Antimusic)
 
 
 
Fan of Exodus charged with terrorism offense after posting Exodus lyrics online. I think the real crime here is that there are still fans of Exodus around
source: antimusic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
On your "quest for true love" you must always follow the clues and sometimes they lead you to a field in Oklahoma City where you must lay naked, waiting for another clue
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nine MSN)
 
 
 
Poet pushes for short penis acceptance. Well, we assume he's pushing
source: lifestyle.ninemsn.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you've ever wanted an island that looks like a gorilla then today is your lucky day
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Pistorius found Guilty of culpable homicide
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Winners of high-profile smart gun design challenge are afraid to come out publicly for fear of being shot on sight
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
Want to do better at college? Scientists recommend breastfeeding
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
A close look at the soldiers being trained in Yemen and Somalia as part of the U.S. anti-terror strategy. One of these soldiers is not like the others; see if you can spot which one
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Olive Garden investors want to take away the only good thing about Olive Garden
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTFark)
 
 
 
Japanese Burger King introduces Black Burger. No plans to release it in America as it would immediately be shot by the police
source: ora.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Giant San Diego panda gets chipped tooth fixed, shows he has better dental coverage than you
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
What's the only thing worse than a coach who molests young children? That would be a coach who molests young children and then tries to hire a hit man to kill them
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Seven bears target woman's home for a nice meal. To be fair, Goldilocks started it
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOCO Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
State Senator says stopping earthquakes is the job of every Oklahoman - like it's their fault
source: koco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WXYZ Detroit)
 
 
 
... trombone
source: wxyz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
"We may have substandard food, but our bathroom is one of the ten best in the country"
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
It's reassuring to know I am not the only one who cannot tell the difference between pop-tarts and cocaine
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
If your grandmother has died and you don't know what to do with her body, the Urban Death Project would love to hear from you
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
On today's episode of the United States of Fascism: Police raid a bar without a warrant and search everyone. "One customer asked about their rights and a police officer told him he had 'the right to shut up.'"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News9 Oklahoma)
 
 
 
Woman accuses husband of cheating, beats him with metal pipe then runs over family dog. Yes alcohol was involved. (tag is for dog)
source: news9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Science)
 
 
 
Two solar flares have sent magnetic fields to our planet -- and scientists aren't sure how they're going to impact each other. Here's everything you need to know about the coming end of the world
source: popsci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
No lady, education reform is not like 9/11
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Georgia wants to join NATO. Well, now the Tea Party is taking this secession talk way too far
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wtnh.com)
 
 
 
Massive perfume factory goes up in flames causing hundreds to be evacuated and possibly contaminating an entire harbor with runoff from the firefighting efforts. Eau de Humanitie
source: wtnh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop me like one of your French potatoes
source: farm3.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Hannity guest A.J. Delgado decides to show Doocy and Kilmeade what REAL victim blaming is all about. Come for "Ray Rice is the bigger victim of domestic violence here," stay for "[Janay] knocked herself out on that railing"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
I don't care if you put a smiley face on it, I am not eating blue slime and rice
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
Harvey Updyke, the Auburn tree poisoner, had been ordered 10 months ago to pay the university $800k in restitution. He's a bit behind on his payments
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda)
 
 
 
Man survives seven point-blank gunshots, including in the head
source: english.pravda.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
High school student launches petition to be allowed to have a cat and lasers in what may be either the most awesome or saddest senior photo ever
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Oscar Pistorius verdict thread: Part Deux. Will he walk or will the judge send him running to the slammer? Tune in and find out. Link goes to live feed. Update: Pistorius found guilty of culpable homicide (manslaughter)
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News and Tribune)
 
 
 
We have an active umbrella situation. Repeat, active umbrella situation. Lock. down. everything
source: newsandtribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"What? You just learned you have cancer? That's horrible, I am so sorry. Also, you're fired"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Bad Santa won't be coming down anyone's chimney after downing five pints of cider, a pint of wine and two bottles of methadone
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Journal)
 
 
 
Best. College. EVAR
source: nationaljournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu September 11, 2014
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Politician upset by billboard implying that state university students like beer
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"The next breakthrough wonder drug, in MY vagina?" It's more likely than you think
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Convicted killer of three students at an Ohio high school cafeteria has escaped from prison. Search is currently underway. Update: He's been captured. Other inmate he escaped with is still on the loose
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Nanny State school bans packed lunches, says you'll eat our food and LIKE it
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
School stops Army Colonel from attending his daughter's school event because his uniform might "offend" some students
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Nobody who can talk knows exactly what the family did behind drawn shades, but we do know it involved bad smells, infestation of vermin, crime scene tape, and a hazmat cleanup crew
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Space.com)
 
 
 
Design a mission patch for this British astronaut
source: space.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
How to embarrass your kid when he gets older.. "Here's little Timmy in the bathtub. Here's little Timmy in his rabbit pajamas. Here's little Timmy, bored, faceplanting on a sofa in the Oval Office in front of the President"
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Three crew members of the International Space Station landed safely in glorious republic of Kazakhstan early this morning. Very nice
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Break out the batter, marinara sauce and lemon wedges, it's giant squid time again
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Guy found a touching way to honor his long-dead twin: pose as him and collect his benefits for years and years
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Truro Daily)
 
 
 
Man crashes into stopped van, then goes down the road to run into the front steps of a house, then drives from there and knocks down a power pole, then flees on foot with his dog who was along for the ride. Ta-da (Oh, alcohol was involved)
source: trurodaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Supermarket tries to hire a sniper to take out one seven inch endangered bird
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Remember the black man killed by police in a Walmart while holding a BB gun sold at the store? After viewing security footage that contradicts him, the 911 caller has conveniently changed his story
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Food Network)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Do you make your own ice cream or custard? Have tips on sating the sweet tooth from home? Show us how it's done
source: foodnetwork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Teacher shoots armed and dangerous nutjob in elementary school bathroom
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
The much-maligned pumpkin beer is not a truly terrible swill, here's why
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flowery headed woman
source: vev.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Wire)
 
 
 
Countering recent statements by the Dalai Lama that he might be the last incarnation of the Lama, the Chinese government issues a statement saying he damn well WILL reincarnate, and like it
source: thewire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lincolnshire Echo)
 
 
 
The best way to deal with £14,000 of parking tickets? Cut them up, send them back and pretend they don't exist
source: lincolnshireecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
FTA: What's more impressive than sharks with laser beams? Dolphins with nuclear missiles
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WVEC)
 
 
 
You know it's going to be a bad day at the auto center when your first customer's car is on fire and holding a dead body
source: wvec.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Florida man invents screen to prevent people from rubbernecking at crime scenes and accidents. Guess you can kiss the Florida tag goodbye
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
On 9/11 2001 Lt. Heather "Lucky" Penney took off from Andrews AFB in her F-16 with orders to bring down United Flight 93 but there was no time to load missiles or ammo onto her plane, which left her just one way to carry out her mission
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"We're sorry for the damage we caused to your luggage and hope this suitcase full of plastic explosives in some small way compensates you for your loss"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
It's OK to commemorate 9/11 on Twitter. That is, unless you're a personified rubber vajayjay for dudes to fap with
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(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
"A 37 year old man has been charged with arson after allegedly setting fire to a sporting club rooms at Littlehampton early this morning." And that's the whole story, so for once you are okay only reading the headline
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Burlington Free Press)
 
 
 
Headline: "Tattoo taboo fades in workplaces" TFA: "Tattoo regret can be expensive"
source: burlingtonfreepress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
Fossil named after other fossil
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
First it was onions and now it's pumpkins. What's next? Quince?
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The Navy is now using a Chicago ER to train combat medics
source: livewellnebraska.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WIVB)
 
 
 
Woman accidentally shoots friend in the leg. At least he used to be her friend
source: wivb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Did you know that 'Hostel' was a documentary?
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Network World)
 
 
 
What online news looked like on 9/11
source: networkworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: I was a beautiful, sexy woman; men wanted me. My husband ravished me. And then, I got pregnant. Now I look like a troll. Is it right to blame my child for this?" Certainly we have no problem believing you're a troll
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Knoxville news station was taping morning program when suddenly OMG GIANT BATS (w/video)
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
"In addition to terabytes of child pornography, police also discovered fifty frozen cats in the suspect's home"
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dangerous Minds)
 
 
 
"In one of Leonardo da Vinci's many notebooks containing innumerable artistic and scientific sketches and notes of incomprehensible importance, there is a sketch of two penises with legs and tails walking towards a crudely drawn anus"
source: dangerousminds.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
You may want to sit down for this, but homeschooling is bad for children
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
School system: Yes, lesson plans on George Bush and Adolf Hitler were approved for class. No, they weren't meant to be taught together
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
You might want to take this study that says sodium does not affect blood pressure with a grain of salt. Or, if you strictly follow CDC guidelines, don't
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Northern Territory News)
 
 
 
Having nothing else to be concerned about, local residents are miffed with garbage can lid covers being changed from green to red. (With picture of some of the victims of this atrocity)
source: ntnews.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Two fraternity brothers charged with hosting "all-you-can drink" party and inviting 18-year-old woman who learned just how much she can drink before falling out of a window
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
"Real quick reminder to all the college students that are coming back to Boston to further their higher education. This is really important: nobody in the 617 area code likes you" (w/ vid)
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(WAFB Baton Rouge)
 
 
 
Man learns the hard way that you can't always trust the bar to check IDs after being arrested for going home with 15-year-old at closing time
source: wafb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Crazed man goes through neighborhood using knife to trash cars, destroy an American flag, and decapitate a stuffed animal. "He drove here, got out and decided to start cutting. That's crazy"
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Photoshop Kawachi Fuji Gardens, Kitakyushu, Japan
source: pbs.twimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Nothing makes doing drugs more uncool than doing drugs with your dad in an interstate motel and he's the one who flips out and can't handle his shiat
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Toronto mayor Rob Ford hospitalized with suspected karma
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Houston Fark Party, Thursday Sept 11th at 7:00pm at Cecil's Tavern
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Can't you see what he is saying? A happy worker is a busy worker. Three cents' worth of moon cake could save us thousands of man hours in labor...Let the fools have their moon cake
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Pistorius Victorius? Verdict is being read live by the Judge. Update: not guilty of intentional homicide
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
If you can't commit yourself to watching a complete, 10-hour Amish barn raising, here one is in four minutes
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Ever wish your morning coffee could be served in a chocolate-dipped edible waffle cup? Yeah, me too
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
Newly discovered hidden city near Stonehenge was a nice place where you could enjoy a beer at the pub before ripping corpses apart and sticking them in the ground
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(7 Deadly)
 
 
 
Ben and Jerry's releases new "Satisfy My Bowl" ice cream for stoners
source: 7deadlymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
Forty years later, daredevils hoping to be the next Evel Knievel are still looking to claim his Snake River Canyon jump, epic foot-long 70s shirt collars
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
What kind of school would ban kids from using ChapStick? Elementary, my dear Watson
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun News Network)
 
 
 
Mental hospital gives day pass to one of its patients--a guy who beheaded his mother and was deemed too crazy for trial. You might want to sit down for this, but he didn't come back
source: sunnewsnetwork.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Chicago bans smoking of cigarettes, e-cigarettes, marijuana, and medical marijuana in all 580 public parks. There, that should fix everything that's wrong with Chicago
source: politics.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Don't have a lot of money but you want to go on vacation? Just create a dream holiday using Photoshop and Facebook like this Dutch student did
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 488: "I Tawt I Taw a Puddytat Numba Tree". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed September 10, 2014
(Japan Today)
 
 
 
Move to rural Japan, have a cow. Or not: "So far there has only been one person who took us up on the cow, and that was two decades ago"
source: japantoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Hole in the ozone layer repairing itself. Paint huffing guy inconsolable
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Minor issues the super villain lair you're fixing up might have, such as suffocation, sewage backflow, and overcompensation
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
Based on a survey of kids who have not even chosen their Halloween costumes yet, Wal-Mart thinks it knows what the hottest 20 toys will be this holiday season
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
When planning your daring heist, remember: there are good getaway vehicles, and there are great getaway vehicles. There's also the Walmart motorized wheelchair shopping cart in Fruitport
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: White collar workers in blue collar jobs
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
What would you do when the thin man in a red hat walking two mean dogs hands you a live grenade?
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
A ton of police have surrounded a small Ferguson protest and are making arrests. This is not a repeat
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
For only $1,000, you too can own a purse made from dog hair
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
Once again, using a stolen forklift to make off with an ATM never gets old in Florida
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Hey Millennials, having trouble paying back those college loans, rent, or just finding a good full time gig? Newsweek wants you to know there's this new thing called "Sugar Dating" and pretty much everyone's doing it
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
President Obama denied tee times at three golf courses, forced to attend fundraisers instead
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
NewsFlash
 
NFL looking for new commissioner
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
One of the highest ranking members in the history of Scientology reveals why she left the alien worshiping, celebrity fleecing cult. And yes they are going full force after her
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Latest from the network that reports everywhere a plane is not: the woman who will not be not attending the games that no one knows about
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
I'll see your history teacher complaining about a lack of god in public schools and raise you a biology teacher who said, "evolution based [sic] science classes discredit the reliability of the Bible and get rid of God as Creator"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Dominatrix speaking at Canadian Senate committee threatens to out politicians who use sex services if new backwards arse Conservative prostitution bill goes through. In other news, Fark desperately in need of "Oh Snap" tag
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Corsicana Daily Sun)
 
 
 
A 2012 federal investigation found that cops planted meth on a woman in retaliation for her refusal of a judge's sexual advances and now she's been arrested again for meth for real. Woman's lawyer: WAIT A GOSH DARN MINUTE
source: corsicanadailysun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Free Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Joker
source: freeimages.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
News: Mechanics take customer cars for a late-night drag race. Fark: Marked police cruisers
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Now here's something that'll keep you up nights worrying: Researchers find that users of sleeping pills and anti-anxiety drugs have as much as a 51% greater chance of developing Alzheimer's
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News9 Oklahoma)
 
 
 
"911, help, my wife is having a baby." "Okay, don't worry, we'll send some more pregnant women to your house"
source: news9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
The best burrito sold in America comes from Chipotle. Espera. ¿Usted es serio? Déjenme reír aún más fuerte
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
You know what else plays in Peoria? Highly contagious Norwegian scabies
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
"And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for your meddling kid"
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 7 KOSA)
 
 
 
You can add "frisbee golfers" to the giant list of "Things that cause a 'responsible gun owner' to fear for his life"
source: cbs7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Freedom Hacker)
 
 
 
If you transferred all your nude pictures to Google we've got some bad news for you
source: freedomhacker.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
Truck spills thousands of oranges across the road and it's BEAUTIFUL
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Ever wondered why "food pilgrims" will line up for hours to taste the latest hip food? No, it's not because they're morons. Well, OK, not only because of that
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Charts reveal what ages men and women find the most attractive in a partner - and the results are as creepy as you might suspect
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(West Chester Daily Local)
 
 
 
Court frowns on the efforts of a man who tried to re-set a rooster's internal clock with a baseball bat
source: dailylocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Pennsylvania teen busted after posting Facebook pic of him getting to 3rd base with a statue of Jesus
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Get a cup of coffee from the office break room. Inhale the aroma. Anticipate that first taste. Bring the mug to your lips. Pause for a scintillating moment before swallowing the coffee and all the office germs that came with it
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Oh kids, Horton and the Kwuggerbug are back with some other "Lost Stories" from Dr. Seuss
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
New campaign aims to stop bullying of gingers even though gingers have no souls
source: edinburghnews.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
A friendly reminder: Some of the world's most popular websites will intentionally slow down because they think it will draw attention to the net neutrality controversy. It's your official REMEMBER BUFFERING discussion thread
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Scientists discover mutant bacteria that thrive on a steady diet of radioactive waste. No way this could possibly go wrong
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Arizona is underwater. This is not a repeat from December 7, 1941
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Founder of Maine elephant refuge trampled to death by elephant; now they're going to blame ALL the elephants but this is probably the work of el-queda
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Woman high on meth yells at her disabled boyfriend, pushing him off his mobility scooter and then screaming in rage in full view of neighbors. How this didn't happen in Florida is beyond everyone
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Today's 'engineer accidentally loads his entire porn stash to a public Jumbotron' story is brought to you by China
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Crooks & Liars)
 
 
 
Famous last words directed at the police :"HEY This is on iCloud"
source: crooksandliars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
ISIS declares war on Twitter: Whoever loses, we win
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKRN Nashville)
 
 
 
Not news: Guy talks about drugs at dinner. Fark: Butt-dials 911 while talking about drug deal, gets arrested after dessert
source: wkrn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
The next time you're following a recipe that calls for shrimp and you're all out of shrimp, just use crickets
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
....and that's how the Allen wrench led to World War III
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(World Review)
 
 
 
The Ukraine crisis may have re-energised Nato's interest in Europe, but its future lies in closed-off cliquey meetings between key players, rather than grand self-congratulatory summits
source: worldreview.info   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Philly)
 
 
 
Quiznos owner causes controversy by displaying sign that says "We the people are angry." The anger most likely stems from a hoagie vs. sub. vs. grinder debate
source: myfoxphilly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
"To the outside world, Northern Ireland remains a strange, peripheral backwater"
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda)
 
 
 
Squirrel steals packet of drugs and runs away from students and police officer
source: english.pravda.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pink News UK)
 
 
 
Egypt says two men arrested at same-sex marriage "test negative" for homosexuality. There's a test for that now?
source: pinknews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Magazine)
 
 
 
Take away Harvard's tax-exempt status. "Harvard is a real-estate and hedge-fund concern that happens to have a college attached"
source: nymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Guarded by headless sphinxes and supported by armless virgins, could this be the lost tomb of Alexander the Great? Probably not say excavators, but a lot of statues were harmed in its making, that's for sure
source: news.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
There was a time in our society when people thought it was good idea to put their babies in cages and hang them outside of windows to air them out
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Just because you've sent Bristol Palin 1,000 messages on Facebook so you think that means she likes you doesn't mean it's cool to fly all the way up to Alaska to surprise her in her driveway
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Llanelli Star)
 
 
 
Mynyddygarreg woman who drove 300 yards while drunk banned for two years after being unable to spell her town's name at police roadside checkpoint
source: llanellistar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Vancouver city officials would like reassure the public that they did not commission the anatomically-correct statue of Satan which was, um, 'erected' along Grandview highway last night (not safe for work)
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
World's fattest cat starts crash diet to reduce its weight from 23 pounds to something less grotesque (pics)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
If you can hook up a machine gun to some car parts, a Game Boy, and a flatscreen TV, the Star League would like to recruit you to defend the frontier against Xur and the Ko-Dan armada, because you're the future of urban warfare
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
So, the Ferguson City Council held their first public meeting since the "recent unpleasantness." Let's see how that went.... Oh, dear
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this white rabbit
source: media2.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJRT)
 
 
 
17-year-old girl starts successful donut shop in Virginia town. Enter conservative Christians
source: abc12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Infant recovering after having arms and legs amputated. FARK: He was born with four of each
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
How come you still get political robocalls even though you're on a 'Do Not Call' list?
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPBS San Diego)
 
 
 
Local school district now owns a tank for dealing with kids that won't pay attention in class
source: kpbs.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
You know how there have only been four Ebola patients evacuated to the United States? Yeah, you didn't actually know that, because it's a lot more
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Hmm. Be out of work two weeks with a higher probability of encephalitis and other horrible side effects, or get vaccinated. Decisions decisions
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Forget the "Like" button. Now you can buy your friends a beer on Facebook
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
And you know there is someone out there in NYC that would actually pay $1 million for a parking space
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
This is what happens when British people have too much time on their hands
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
More American families own cats than stocks
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue September 09, 2014
(Slate)
 
 
 
Honestly, who puts butter in their coffee? That's not regular
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Police ID Cleveland-area teens responsible for prank on autistic kid, Roger Goodell sentences them to attend two Browns games
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Japanese Emperor warned his country about going to war with the U.S. ahead of WWII - and even tried to talk the Germans out of bombing Pearl Harbor, according to new book
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Walmart releases new dress code for employees. Unfortunately still no dress code for customers
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
It rained in Nevada, so I-15 north of Las Vegas will be closed for days while DOT officials look for their sponge
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Teen girls are known to try and get as close to their idols as possible as they become emotionally over-attached to stars, like Robert Pattinson, Justin Bieber, ISIS, David Beckh--WAIT WHAT?
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTZ Burlington)
 
 
 
Man busted at bus station for drug cache found inside his D.A.R.E. Lion
source: wptz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
Come for the drunk customer that bites two, stay for the chef that reverses a head lock
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Iron Photoshop Ingredient: The incredible, edible egg
source: cliggro.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
The good news: US prepares for global warming. The bad news: By coming up with euphemisms for it
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Easiest way to learn Mandarin Chinese: coma
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
City councilor signs petition to recall mayor. Mayor takes councilor for a late night drive, pulls a gun, and asks if he really meant to sign the petition
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Suck it up son, just because you live six feet too close to school to ride on the bus and have to walk 40 minutes instead. Why in my day we had to walk 2 miles up hill... both ways
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KBOI2 Boise)
 
 
 
Excessive rain turns barley crop into domestic beer
source: kboi2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KLTV Tyler)
 
 
 
Man arrested for eating a rare turtle. I guess you're supposed to cook them well done
source: kltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Canada announces they have found ship that went missing in the Arctic 160 years ago. Immediately put in charge of hunt for flight MH370
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Crazed, naked and Australian is no way to go through with a carjacking, son. Actually, add 'hog-tied' to that
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Tennis Match: ready... set... go
source: zastavki.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Is there anything cuter than underwater puppies?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
It's not delivery, it's totally inept usage of social media
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
One hundred onions stolen from 5th-grade students. This will all end in tears
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ora.tv)
 
 
 
WTFark takes on the mystery of the dark wanderer. Is it Death? No, it is simply a dark and robed figure, who is here to educate us on the wisdom of...Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
source: on.ora.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kickstarter)
 
 
 
Always having problems storing your epic loot? This might be the solution
source: kickstarter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Liberals outraged that American children don't eat French food
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Conceptually for sale: Distinctive seaside property with spectacular coastal views. Would suit high-value buyer untroubled by vertigo or fond of crapping themselves on an hourly basis
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
Today in badly worded headlines: Road rage leads police to murder victim's boyfriend
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Dutch accident investigation says MH17 flight was normal until objects "pierced the plane at high velocity"
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
"I just flew in from ISIS controlled Iraq, and boy are my arms tired." *Badoom-tish* "Take my wives, please." *Badoom-tish* " Remember, try the hummus, and I'll be here all week unless I get martyred"
source: america.aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC DFW)
 
 
 
The latest stupid and dangerous teen challenge? The 'Fugitive Game'
source: nbcdfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
♫ Get your motor runnin'..... ♫
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
When sleepwalking, walking around the house is one thing but if you're a sleepwalker who likes to go camping maybe you want to tie a rope around your leg before you walk off a cliff
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
13-year-old DC girl is a child piano prodigy who has won prestigious music competitions all over the world, but since she's had to miss ten days of school to travel to these competitions and perform, according to the DC Public Schools, she's a truant
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Legality of interracial couple's marriage questioned in VA. No, this is not a repeat from 1967
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
If you're in Baltimore and find yourself in possession of a Ray Rice jersey, instead of setting fire to it like you should, you can give it to Hersh's Pizza, who will give you free food in return
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
Everything you always wanted to know about Scottish independence but couldn't be bothered to ask
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
"Remember Tamagotchis? They taught you about responsibility. They taught you about friendship. But most importantly, they taught you friends don't leave friends in rooms filled with their own feces. Now, Tamagotchi is back - and it is still hungry"
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
ISIS is paying $50,000 for the identity of any American entering Syria
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Clickhole)
 
 
 
"Millennials are the worst generation in the history of the United States" because only one of the author's nephews knows who Ace Frehley is
source: clickhole.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
So what was it that brought Malaysia Airlines Flight 17 down? A missile or was it aliens? It could have been aliens you know
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
The obvious answer is "everything"
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
One person in 20 is having an affair with a neighbor
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Who among us hasn't thought about the merits of getting a face tattoo? But this is too much
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
If you live in Atlanta and are anywhere close to the CDC Medical Center, you might want to seriously start considering moving somewhere safer. Like Detroit
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Facebook to use animated dinosaur to help users adjust privacy settings, because nobody would click to get rid of Barney
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
How to spot a narcissist. Wasn't this a great headline? I think only I could come up with it. What would Fark do without me and my headlines?
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
The liquor laws in New Albany, Indiana, state that an establishment that sells liquor by the drink must also serve food. Here's how one bar complied, even though they don't want to cook
source: uproxx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Over their lifetime the average person spends an entire year nursing a hangover. Pfft. Amateurs
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(When On Earth)
 
 
 
Some of the most surreal and bizarre landscape photos taken by a Swedish artist you'll see all day
source: whenonearth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Indigenous tribe in Amazon, tired of waiting on Brazilian government to take on illegal loggers, take matters into their own hands. Round up loggers, beat them with sticks, confiscate weapons, burn equipment and steal their pants. w/pics
source: widerimage.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Apple)
 
 
 
Apple Live Event Thread? Why not. All the speculation, promises of wallet gutting and "INSTALL LINUX" will be right here at 10AM PST/1PM EST. LGT Apple's live stream page
source: apple.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Russian aircraft flies over Canadian warship. In related news, Canada has a warship
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Three reasons never to use the term "friendzone." Also, calling that stupid hat a "trilby" doesn't make it look less like a fedora
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: Finish the unfinished sketch
source: 3.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Death and Taxes Magazine)
 
 
 
Megachurch to close after pastor refers to women as "penis homes." Don't worry, it gets worse
source: deathandtaxesmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
I'll see you down in Arizona Bay
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook