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Sun June 15, 2014
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Welcome to the 'Gunshine State' -- woman accidentally shoots herself in leg during timed shooting competition
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
You don't have to be ashamed anymore to admit you love a nice Rose wine
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
America's middle class never had it so bad
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
E-Cigarettes could be worse than "regular" cigarettes. Or they could be safer. But no one really knows
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun News Network)
 
 
 
"Welcome to school, student with a learning disability. Instead of learning math or science you'll wash the teachers' cars and mend clothes for the play"
source: sunnewsnetwork.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Attention all Fark thespians. "Rob Ford the Musical" is holding casting calls tomorrow. Are YOU fat, drunk and belligerent enough to walk the boards as the big man himself? Methinks thou art
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Photobucket)
 
 
 
Photoshop someone or something into the leader of the pack
source: i292.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Police save raccoon with peanut butter jar stuck on its head. Surprisingly, no bullets were used during the course of this rescue
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
This just in: Summer is the worst time for teenage drivers
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medford Mail Tribune)
 
 
 
Woman and her dog attacked by deer shocked that Oregon hippies aren't cool with (deer) population control: "Their first response was not, 'are you OK?' but that I should have known better and the deer must have fawns nearby"
source: mailtribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Nobody's buying sausage pizza anymore in NYC. The sausage slice has been replaced by buffalo chicken and pineapples, artichokes and ziti
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCVB Boston)
 
 
 
From the "Damned If You Do, Damned If You Don't" department: bicyclist punched in the face for refusing to run a red light
source: wcvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
US surpasses Russia as world's top oil and natural gas producer. Thanks Obama
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baton Rouge Advocate)
 
 
 
Bobby Jindal vetoes bill that would make it illegal to haul your dogs unrestrained at 70 miles per hour in the back of your truck
source: theadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
IT worker quits job so he can play a corpse for a living. Seems like a logical transition
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this house starting kit
source: l2.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Superb animal has already should not abandon the garbage - cigarette buttocks in this area
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
County forced to move its morgue due to mold. It's not like it was bothering the corpses
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The Civil War claims three more victims
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Nobody would fall for that #EndFathersDay parody hashtag, right? Let's ask this Time columnist
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(All Access)
 
NewsFlash
 
His feet are off the ground, and he has finally reached the stars. Casey Kasem dies at 82
source: allaccess.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"Excuse me, we know that your 3 year old is recovering from a pit bull mauling, but...uh...her face is scaring customers, so I'm going to have to ask you to leave"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Recorder)
 
 
 
Research shows that throwing money down the toilet or buying sunscreen is pretty much the same thing
source: sciencerecorder.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Pope Francis wants everyone to know that the Global Economy is about to come crashing down upon us
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Who wants to bid on this historic farm? It was home to a haunted attraction and a sex club...wait, wait, WHAT?
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Delaware Online)
 
 
 
Delaware celebrates their independence day, when they threw off the yoke of tyranny that is Pennsylvania
source: delawareonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
The end of Fark is near
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Pope Francis refuses to use the Popemobile, even though he knows that could make him the holeyist Pope ever
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
Cliff Notes of Tony Blair's tl;dr opinion on Iraq: because we didn't jump into Syria, not because the 2003 invasion was a shiat-stained farkup of a mistake
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Tomato truck overturns on I-8. Cleanup took quite a while, since procuring a truck full bacon and lettuce is a difficult task on a weekend
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rochester Institute of Tech)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pipe puller
source: rit.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Root)
 
 
 
Another school shooting rocks the nation. Well, substitute "Waffle House" for "school," and change "rocks the nation" to "surprises nobody"
source: theroot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Anaheim City Hall janitor arrested for hiding camera in women's restroom. Detectives described it as Mickey Mouse setup
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
JetBlue denies a 3-year old child permission to use the restroom while the plane is stuck on the tarmac, and nature takes its course, anyway
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 10 Mobile)
 
 
 
Hospice patient was former forest ranger, but hasn't been able to go outside for several years, because of his illness. Firefighters decide to take him on one last hike in the forest. Dust, dust... it's everywhere
source: fox10tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Good news, ladies living in Alaska. You can now get free pregnancy tests in bar bathrooms, the same place you can get condoms, cigarettes, tampons, before and after mints, edible underwear, fake tattoos and in some cases dinner
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
"...schools have tried to avoid the ambiguity by mandating that students get explicit verbal permission before making any sexual advance...The only way around the rule is if students have a prior verbal agreement to use a pre-arranged hand signal"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
To be fair, no one would expect a submarine base in Idaho
source: foxtrotalpha.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming up at the top of the hour, it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents. 2 hours of music on public radio from Juneau, Alaska, hosted by a farker
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Spontn80)
 
 
 
(checks date) Seven Years Running. What would you say to your Dad today if you could?
source: dangrigor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat June 14, 2014
(Slate)
 
 
 
Why Malaysia Flight MH370 will never officially be declared lost. CNN executives seen popping open champagne bottles
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patheos)
 
 
 
Mormon jihad? Oregon school shooter was 'devout Mormon' who wanted to kill 'sinners' who 'smoked cigarettes and took the Lord's name in vain'
source: patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Woman is admitted to the hospital to have her ovaries removed, comes out with a 32-week-old baby
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Baghdad Bob's replacement would like you to know that everything is normal and there's nothing to see here
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Dog falls 16 stories and survives. That's the equivalent of a human falling 112 stories
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"If homeowners discover a bee or wasp nest in their house, we would urge them to get it inspected and removed by a professional. Starting fires is not an effective way to clear these nests and we would encourage people not to do this"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
So, apparently there's a "Sandwich Generation"
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this 83-year-old man working out
source: media1.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
It's harder to work at an Arkansas P.F. Chang's than it is for NASA
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
If you consider college costs and ignore the terrible drivers, permanent Democratic majority, omnipresent traffic cameras, Baltimore, suburban sprawl, traffic congestion, and stratospheric taxes, then Maryland is totally the best state in the union
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
If Baghdad falls, today's gas prices will "look like a bargain in a couple weeks". Happy vacation season, everyone
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Crooks & Liars)
 
 
 
Sovereign Citizen about to find out if yelling "man overboard" or complaining about fringe on the flag will get him out of his murder trial
source: crooksandliars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
George Bush makes move to rescue Iraq
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Nearly half of U.S. House of Representative wiped out in one massive highway incident. Nobody inconsolable
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
The Florida Responsibility Paradox: If a mother forgets her child at daycare, and the daycare forgets the child is there and locks up for the night, who's to blame?
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this motorcyclist
source: media4.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Boston)
 
 
 
Woman charged with making decimal system dewy
source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Thought Catalog)
 
 
 
Only 5?
source: thoughtcatalog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Not news: Vandal sprays walls of police station with 'DUMB COPS' and 'KINGY BOYZ RULE' graffiti before fleeing on child's scooter. Fark: Suspect is 63 years old
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
For cops, punching a hippie is like winning the lottery. The $120,000 a year for the rest of your life lottery
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Florida Department of Citrus set to introduce a new mascot, Captain Citrus. They were originally going to call him The Big Orange Fruit, but were afraid the estate of Liberace would sue for trademark infringement
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Mars ain't the kind of place to send your introverts, in fact it's dull as hell
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Mother arrested on Federal kidnapping charges after she absconded with her 2 year-old daughter to avoid sending her to preschool and having her vaccinated
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
7th Circuit Court unanimously rules Indiana prison cannot place prisoner in solitary confinement for doing what Indiana prison ordered him to do
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boulder Daily Camera)
 
 
 
Thief pours acid on an ATM to crack it open. Police shocked by such a baseless attempt at robbery
source: dailycamera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Here's what redheads really look like, FARKers. Your pics of blondes and brunettes who found a dye bottle are a lie. Redheads are actually either quite plain or unfortunate looking. LOOK UPON THE TRUTH AND WEEP
source: lens.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
If your rave buddy drinks alloy wheel cleaner for a quick high and ends up dead, do you c) memorialize him by drinking alloy wheel cleaner for a quick high in his memory and ending up dead?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJON St. Cloud)
 
 
 
Judge decides that controversial milk farmer got a raw deal and lets him off easy
source: wjon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peterborough Telegraph)
 
 
 
Problem: the word "hero" is overused. Solution: borrow the word "superheld" from German and use it to describe real heroic people. Real superheld dead from cancer
source: peterboroughtoday.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Chicagoans celebrate Father's Day weekend by shooting fifteen people in twelve hours
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Polish man keeps lawnmower on the balcony in case it gets stolen. Did I say lawnmower? Sorry, I meant horse
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Another Ariel Castro. This time it's in Florida
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"The perfect wedding doesn't exist. Stop spending so much money and enjoy the party"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
FBI on the lookout for the "Vampire Trucker" who used fake teeth to appear like a vampire and sometimes filed his victims' teeth
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Feminists to protest tech company who advertised for a "Girl Friday." I agree on how that is offensive... a man could do that job just as well as a woman. Where's the equality?
source: blog.seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJLA Washington DC)
 
 
 
Subby's friend and mentor is finally recognized for his actions. Let's give a Boy Scout and a Navy salute to Chip Zawislak
source: wjla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Cougar hides in Mountain View neighborhood for nine hours. Young men urged to be cautious in case it returns
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this chase
source: 4.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
We stigmatize drivers who are drunk, drivers who text, drivers who are high--so why don't we stigmatize drivers who are sleepy?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Marriage fraud charges dropped after Federal agents find couple sleeping in bed together
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Chinese spies infiltrate Iowa
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Portland attack cat featured on "My Cat from Hell"...it's not all warm and fuzzy
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
San Mateo County, CA. announces first sighting of endangered California Condor since 1904. County wildlife officials promise the public they will do everything in their power to kill the bird once again
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Minnesota)
 
 
 
Man brings a shovel to a chainsaw fight, survives
source: minnesota.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"So there are potholes all over Chicago....let's make art out of them"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Chicago man charged for driving around on a beautiful summer's evening with: (A) his music playing too loud, (B) his muffler dragging on the pavement, (C) his pants off, (D) him pleasuring himself. (Choose two)
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Time to remove your pants and have a cold beer at the ready: it's time for the Fark Weird News Quiz: Hell Yes It's Summer edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Do animals have sex for pleasure? (Their pleasure, not the researchers')
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
The Ukrainian Defense Ministry says that pro-Russian separatists have shot down a large military transport plane
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri June 13, 2014
(KWCH Wichita)
 
 
 
Sleeping bag? Check. Flashlight? Check. Bottle of acid to throw on other campers who make you mad? Check
source: kwch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"My name is Talky Tina and I'm going to kill you"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Introducing the first café that caters to people with Alzheimer's, where there's always something new on the menu
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Bad: 911 dispatcher tells rape victim to "Quit crying." Worse: The dispatcher won't face a reprimand
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Thank you for calling 911. Please leave a message and a representative will collect your corpse as soon as possible
source: myfoxtampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Military Times)
 
 
 
So just how did 800 ISIS terrorists armed with pickups and small arms defeat 30,000 US trained and equipped Iraqi troops?
source: militarytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ARL Now)
 
 
 
For those of you who are new to our country: it may come as a surprise, but the IRS will not call you at home and threaten to deport you as a way to get you to load money onto Home Depot gift cards
source: arlnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
For anyone who doubts American exceptionalism: meet the guy who built a 300 ft. slip-n'-slide using his mother's garden tools
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
To the left, 13 things you should never put in a microwave. To the right, other observations
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Today)
 
 
 
Fund to help Chef "Sav" raises $50,000 in 36 hours
source: today.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this kiosk yawn
source: 24.media.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Academic publisher tries to stop publication of paper on price-gouging in academic publishing
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PSFK)
 
 
 
App teaches kids about nutrition by allowing them to scan packages of food and simulating the sound and vibration of the fart it will produce
source: psfk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
There are more barrels of bourbon in Kentucky than people - and that's the only strange bourbon fact
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Students kicked out of dorms, forced to live in locker rooms. Wait, wasn't this the plot of a movie?
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
When a news article needs to remind you that you shouldn't smear peanut butter all over your dog and tie him up outside you KNOW it is bear season in Illinois
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
It took a startup 7 years to make a cup. Inflation must have driven the price to $199
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Second teenage girl and her mother open up about being duped by 'molester' who posed as Twilight star. Still a better love story than Twilight
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPTV Portland)
 
 
 
Bad idea #213: Feeding wild alligators from your mouth
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
Finally, an art exhibition we can all get behind
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
In today's episode of "When did you get so farking old?": Madonna's daughter is graduating from high school next month
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Science)
 
 
 
Just when you think Australia couldn't possibly find another way to kill you it gets invaded by the Zika Virus
source: popsci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
U.S. spent $3 million on boats for Afghanistan. Because geography
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop the owner into this shirt
source: superdecals.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
In a scene that may or may not be from a new John Waters movie, Baltimore police shoot cow running loose in downtown Baltimore
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
OJ Simpson says that of all the things that can be proven in court, unfaithfulness to his wives his biggest regret
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
New app informs foragers where they can find fruit trees, berries, nuts, herbs, vegetables, mushrooms, and dumpsters in their neighborhood
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Finally, justice will be served. Romanian hacker indicted for his fiendish plot to unleash the paintings of George W. Bush upon an unsuspecting world
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Researchers: "Men who met sex partners via app have a greater incidence of gonorrhea and chlamydia compared to men who meet the old fashioned way: clubs, the street, sex party, bathhouse or the more recent old fashioned way: online dating sites"
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl goes from one hot hellhole in the desert that's controlled by religious extremists to another
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
You know you've done something wrong with your life when you're remembered as "holocaust denier" first and "teacher" second
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Drew was caught dancing naked on a greased stripper pole at a midget meth house
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 4 Charleston)
 
 
 
Headline: 'SC prosecutor releases human trafficking plan'. Seems pretty bold to be just putting it out there like that
source: abcnews4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
After a 69-year cease fire, Allied bombing resumed in Germany today
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Animal lovers, better get your last licks in: Bestiality could be outlawed in New Jersey
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Which ancient beast once thought to be extinct can be found thriving across the Alaskan landscape? A) Woolly Mammoth B) Sabre-Toothed Tiger C) Blockbuster Video
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: Can we have a column dedicated to shiatty fathers just in time for Father's Day? You gave us one about terrible mothers for Mother's Day"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
Haters gonna paint: I don't always leave passive-aggressive notes for my neighbors, but when I do they're in the form of an 8-foot-tall painted sign
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Navy intercepts solo sailing dog
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
How secure is the WIC food stamp program? Let's set up a pretend grocery store and find out
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Scienticians shocked to discover that cities with bike share programs have seen a rise in head injuries
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
New Yorkers Are Why New York Can't Have Nice Things, episode 1433: asshat using a Central Park water fountain as a bidet for their horrid little yap-yap dog that would be hawk chow in a just world
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Fark-ready headline: Beef penis improperly sold for human consumption, suit alleges
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
A once-in-a-century honey moon rises on Friday the 13th. WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Clickhole)
 
 
 
The Onion's parody of Buzzfeed is better than Buzzfeed
source: clickhole.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Rapidly climbing the "cause of death" charts: the selfie
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
53 year old man steals 600 high school girl's uniforms from 50 different schools
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Police arrest crossdresser who absconded with eighteen televisions from a Walmart
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RamblingBeachCat.com)
 
 
 
Stupid: Woman steals lobster tails by shoving them down her pants. Farking Stupid: ...to trade for painkillers. Florida Stupid: ....or Chinese food
source: ramblingbeachcat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Caption this chin alignment
source: l1.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
"Well-dressed" man walks up to women in stores and tells them he's a doctor, then gives them a breast exam. Apparently in the South, "well-dressed" means a shirt and tie
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Soshiok)
 
 
 
Today's freaky new foodie trend: Egg on a stick
source: soshiok.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Trojan Burger
source: fresher.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Car crashes into lobby of CNN Center, is immediately suspected of being a piece of Flight MH370
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
89 inmates escape from Ford open prison in Sussex, England; an incident that would never have happened if they'd been kept in Chevy prison
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Dallas/Ft. Worth)
 
 
 
That house teetering on a cliff in Texas? They're going to burn it to the ground at 10:00 AM local time
source: dfw.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Cops, blackface, a 'negro party,' bananas, photographs, Facebook. You know the rest
source: thelocal.fr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Well shoot, looks like the NRA needs to let fly with a new slogan against gun legislation
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Mechanics)
 
 
 
Four things you need to know about the collapse of Iraq. None of which answer the question, "Why is this article in Popular Mechanics?"
source: popularmechanics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
The elusive Yankee Candle bandit has finally been caught. We can all breathe a breath of fresh smelly air
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Latest Venezuelan shortage is: A) food, B) toilet paper, C) coffins
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Kids who were popular in middle school become losers in adulthood, says science geek who wasn't popular in middle school
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metronews.ca)
 
 
 
"Man's death in ER can't reoccur." Apparently he nailed it the first time
source: metronews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Only in Florida: Stealing an iPad and making your getaway in a kayak. No we're not making this up
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGAL 8)
 
 
 
Man accused of trying to hire an inmate to kill the police informant from murder-for-hire case he was originally jailed for. Now if he could just hire someone to kill the inmate that he wanted to kill the informant, he might get away with it
source: wgal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Tying a rope around your waist and running down a cliff face may sound dangerous, but don't worry, this guy thought of every safety precaution. That's why he put a bucket on his head
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu June 12, 2014
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Always drive in the right lane except to pass. The left lane is for gunfights
source: thecitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Lawsuit alleges company made employees pray each day, as well as thank them for their jobs. Oh yeah, and there's Onionhead
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Optical illusion creates a different shade of color for every viewer, but scientists don't know why
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Man mistakenly freed by jury gets stabbed to death hours later. Whew, dodged a bullet there
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
"Excuse me sir, you've been speeding. Please step out of the vehicle so we can steal it"
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
And now for a slightly different breed of pet hoarder. Nope, not dogs, cats, rats or hamsters
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Here's a headline that should have been worded differently: Bachelor party makes impressive fossil discovery in Elephant Butte
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Create a coat of arms for your city of residence
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
As predicted, hipster beekeeping in Brooklyn is not making friends in the neighborhood, especially when the bees aren't properly secured
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
Leukemia drug works, but still no cure for ... oh wait
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Mormon Church excommunicates woman who asked to become a priest, obviously because it would lead to the slippery slope of polyandry
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
In Phoenix it gets hot in the summer, so people run their AC, which makes temperatures outside get higher, which makes people run their AC even longer, which makes the temperatures outside get even higher, which makes people run their AC even longer
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
How to clean all the dead skin cells, dust mites, bed bug larvae, Cheetos crumbs, and gravy stains off your mattress
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Article asks if ISIS could build an Islamic state. I don't know, but these Archer plot lines are really getting weird
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
American Catholic bishops decide they ain't listening to no socialist, even if he IS the freaking Pope
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Ugly ass baby rhinoceros born at the Buffalo Zoo
source: buffalozooblog.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
News: Today's teens are drinking less, smoking less, and having less unprotected sex. Fark: Because they're spending too much time on their phones to hang out in person
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
When throwing a hammer at a dump truck is the least insane thing you did on your meth fueled rampage, you may find yourself on Fark
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
Scary: Iraqi refugee family in Albuquerque NM attacked in their home by a ski-mask wearing man who tore up their US citizenship papers and shouted anti-Muslim epithets at them. Ironic:They live in the US because they are Catholic and had to flee Iraq
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Food Nut)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Heading to a party and taking a cold dish that needs to sit out? Like to have quick sides that don't heat up the kitchen? Too many things in the oven? How about those "on-the-side" favorites? Don't leave us hanging
source: twopeasandtheirpod.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Supreme Courts Justices' jobs found to only contain 2% work and 98% refusing to rule on relevant, important issues
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Pair of bright-green 'Hulk puppies' born in Spain. Don't make them angry. You wouldn't like them when they're angry (pics)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yandex.ru)
 
 
 
Photoshop this girl and her scooter
source: img-fotki.yandex.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Can you believe some people still think O.J. Simpson was guilty?
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
SCU published an "open" ad for a professor position, the minimum qualifications included "having written at least 25 books on the history of Silicon Valley" and being an editor at Forbes.com. Oddly someone already on staff had those exact quals
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Oyster Farm: Hey, Feds, we'd like to finish out a 40-year lease on your land to run our business. Feds: OK, but we're not going to renew it when it's over in 7 years. Is that OK? Oyster Farm: Yup, totes cool. *7 years later* ENTER LIBERTARIANS
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Ever wonder what REALLY goes into a Slim Jim? Well the good news is that it's real beef. Partly
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Obama delivers weapons to terrorist group that held Bergdahl
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Afghan humanitarian aid workers pack all the essentials-backpack, water bottle, umbrella, fleshlight... wait, what? (Not safe for work)
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Mynd you, a møøse won't make a good housepet
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Brain-dead US teen to get high school diploma in most blatant example of grade inflation ever seen
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global Post)
 
 
 
China's 'thong condom' is one step closer to reality. With highly technical drawing of a thong condom. Possibly Not safe for work
source: globalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Exeter Express & Echo)
 
 
 
Mugshot of the day? Man with pink underwear fetish says pint of cider made him walk into shop wearing only a pair of suspenders
source: exeterexpressandecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVZ Bend)
 
 
 
Squirrel loses its life in tragic power plant substation accident. The arrangements for a Viking funeral have already been taken care of
source: ktvz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Woman has surgery to emulate Jessica Rabbit, succeeds merely in looking cartoonish
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
A vain hope, but here's a handy guide to help you lot be slightly less offensive
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
In this week's Journal of Duh, study shows that suicide rates greatly accelerated during economic crisis
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Police believe they are just going in for a routine eviction. Then they saw the alligator
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Swim ban lifted after shark swarm shut down Alabama beaches. Locals still in shock after seeing a creature with a full set of teeth
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
European court rules that employees are entitled to take vacation time even after they die
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Drivers are gathering for the Great Nebraska Tractor Ride, perhaps the most exciting event Nebraska will have this year
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
10-year-old boy gets high school diploma, is now setting his sights on medical school, making people stop calling him "Doogie"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Army's anti-sexual harassment video was apparently made in the 1970s, and it looks more like outtakes from cheesy '70s porn than '70s porn does (video, SFW)
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
First came the fires to Magnolia, Texas. Then the floods. And now the scorpions, centipedes, millipedes and earwigs just as the Bible predicted
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
What better way to spend your day off, than standing on a corner dressed as Spider-Man protesting potholes?
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Best Korea finally lays blame of severe shortages squarely where it belongs. The weatherman
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when the Coast Guard clear cuts some trees on your property without your permission to maintain a navigational beacon that has been in place since World War II but went out of service in 2009?
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 4 Charleston)
 
 
 
Police looking for man who rolled back pants and underwear at Walmart
source: abcnews4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
In Russia even the moose are drunk
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Don't know what to get your dad for Father's Day? Why not take him to a strip club and show him what he's been missing out on because he ruined his life by having you?
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IOL.co.za)
 
 
 
South African man caught by police eating the still-warm heart of the man he'd just killed--but with proper utensils. I mean, he's not THAT gauche
source: iol.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Overweight childminder tries to have obesity declared a disability. Farkers nod approvingly, their jowls undulating like waves, sweat glistening in folds like an ocean sunset, breath heaving like a dirty phone call
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCPO Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Teen takes mom's driving directions just a little too literally
source: wcpo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Curbed)
 
 
 
For only $1.74M, this beautiful haunted dreamhouse can be yours
source: ny.curbed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Faith-based waterpark in Texas wants to ban thongs. No word on what kind of footwear they expect people to wear if that ban goes through
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Church shooting in Arizona leaves one angel, another one holey
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
NASA seeking public's help in designing a permanent base on Mars for humans.. If anything was up Fark's Photoshop alley, it's this. Let's all get helpful
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
List of top LGBT-friendly cities in the US. Los Angeles? Check. San Francisco? Check. New York City? Check. Des Moines? Che ... Wait ... WTF?? Des Moines??
source: news.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Herald Sun)
 
 
 
If you're going to tell your friend that your sister is pregnant and you're not sure which of your brothers is the father, it's a good idea to make sure your teacher isn't listening
source: heraldsun.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Pimp my.... PT Cruiser?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBTV 3 Charlotte)
 
 
 
And here's a picture of me at work in the operating room holding a 47-pound tumor harvested from a woman who didn't have health insurance until Obamacare came around
source: wbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
8-year-old British girl diagnosed with terminal brain cancer becomes the first person in the world to beat the illness
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Pop quiz hotshot. Armed robbers are using your daughter as a human shield. What do you do? What do you do?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Remember that 1918 flu pandemic that killed 5% of the world's population? Well scientists just made a mutant version of it. Sleep well
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
United States may launch airstrikes on Iraq. This is not a repeat of 1990. Or 2003
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
R.I.P. Poppy, world's oldest cat
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man gets penis stuck in pipe for two days, and his excuse is priceless
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Woman claims she doesn't know what's in beer, but says it might be CHEMICALS. So she begs the two crappiest beer manufacturers to list what's in their crappy beer and how they make it
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 475: "Happy Farktography Anniversary 9". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed June 11, 2014
(WLKY Louisville)
 
 
 
News: Man arrested for having sex with pool float. Fark: For the THIRD time. Man, get a room
source: wlky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Man decides to test school security by "looking like an a--hole," succeeds
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click2Houston)
 
 
 
Man found guilty of decapitating grandfather, heads off to prison
source: click2houston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Show me your best "I'm outta here" or "Nope" pic/gif
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this classic boombox
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Best/Worst-smelling fire ever damages KFC/Taco Bell
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOCO Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Oklahoma enacts bill that requires married couples who have children younger than 18 to pay for and attend classes before they can split. Too bad they didn't attend any classes BEFORE they got married
source: koco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
"Children's Joy Foundation" is a legitimate, honest, well-intentioned, registered charity and totally not a scam
source: calgary.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWL)
 
 
 
Cops wrongly arrest woman who has the same name as wanted suspect, extradite her to another state, imprison her, realize mistake a month later, let her go, then arrest her again for same reason, woman gets ready to sue, the Aristocrats
source: wwl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
"If a husband threatens to murder his wife with a gun, that's her problem, not the cops'." Was this from: A) Elliot Rodger's manifesto B) some MRA douche-blogger or C) "Reverend" Pat Robertson
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston Post and Courier)
 
 
 
'I turn around and it's Bill Murray with his shirt up ...'
source: postandcourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WOODTV Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
What not to do on National Forklift Safety Day
source: woodtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
EVERYTHING is BIGGER in TEXAS Including the chunk of cliff that collapsed and left the edge of your lakeside McMansion hanging out in mid-air
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(North Jersey)
 
 
 
To be fair, lasagna often leaves a big mess
source: northjersey.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global Post)
 
 
 
Seemed like a good idea at the time. Watch 1,000 daringly stupid people eat 1,000 ghost peppers for fun in Copenhagen
source: globalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Science establishes new first-world problem: "bedtime procrastination"
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPHO Phoenix)
 
 
 
AZ police would like to remind you that "shooting the moon" is an idiomatic expression and NOT an acceptable recreational activity
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Scotland tries to take the British out of JK Rowling and she's not taking it anymore
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Lexington)
 
 
 
Lex Ky family business owner falls while carrying 20gal pot of boiling peanut oil. Drew's hoping folks might be able to help out (DIT)
source: bizlex.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Dear Prudence: I'm totally cool with my husband farking other women whenever he goes to Vegas, but the last time he was there he hooked up with my half-sister, do I have a right to be pissed?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Las Vegas Review Journal)
 
 
 
It's only 106°F in the desert so let's have a bonfire. And let's put the fuel drum next to the flames so it can stay warm, too
source: reviewjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Denver Post opinion editor weighs in on Maureen Dowd's marijuana misadventures. Short version: She's an idiot
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
 
 
 
So I want some fresh eggs....let's go to Rent The Chicken
source: triblive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
You can ask a prostitute to toss your salad, but don't try paying with one. Fortunately no one will ever know you did something so stupid, unless the prostitute is a cop
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
NY landlords launch a media campaign to try to convince people that "the rent is too damn low." Good luck with that
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
FDA says you can once again use your wood before you cut the cheese
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Good news: You may finally get trickled down on
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
As Britain's Prince Philip turns 93, here's a collection of 23 of his most outstanding quotes, suggesting the British view the Royal Family not as sovereign figureheads but more like free cable
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South China Morning Post)
 
 
 
Philippine judge: Ancient Chinese maps debunk Beijing's sea claims. Sorry China, no South China Sea islands for you, it's written in stone
source: scmp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
World's most incompetent photographers compete for 'World's Worst Vacation Photograph' title. The entries are in, and they are just terrible
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Latest generation of emergency signs tell people to get out of the building during a fire alarm before stopping to discuss the event on Facebook and Twitter (pic)
source: mostlysignssomeportents.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Crain's Detroit)
 
 
 
Infant mortality in Detroit worse than other third-world countries, including Mexico, Thailand and China. "Detroit is a bad place," understates one resident
source: crainsdetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Is the Pope Catholic? Of course. Was Cardinal O'Connor Catholic? Not necessarily
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Unprotected sex hookup is a go as smart-phones damage sperm
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
How Robert Heinlein changed from committed socialist to spittle-flecked, right-wing lunatic almost overnight
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Remember that time in 1961 when America almost nuked itself with some hydrogen bombs over North Carolina? Good times
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Strip clubs in NY paid strippers to roofie patrons, and run up tens of thousands of dollars on the customers' credit cards. I don't think I want to live in a world where we can't implicitly trust strippers anymore
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Having late-night sex on a sixth floor balcony can be exciting, but stay off the banister to avoid getting an even bigger and more final bang
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Broward/Palm Beach New Times)
 
 
 
Move over, Ed Cocaine. Florida has a new hero, and her name is Crystal Metheney
source: blogs.browardpalmbeach.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Unusual Pringles flavors
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 40 New Jersey)
 
 
 
Couple arrested for having sex on the beach. Guess they should have stuck with margaritas
source: nbc40.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Springfield officers bust heroin-possessing stripper driving home from work at 3 AM for running red light, note that "she did not have enough clothing on to conceal the illegal narcotic"
source: articles.courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Joseph Robert Wilcox was a good guy with a gun. On Sunday, it cost him his life
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Woman creates fake Facebook profile to talk to her niece, niece asks the fictional person to kill the woman and other family members
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
My name it Eric Olaniyan. Much nice vehicle you have there. I am willing to pay top dollar in gold for your vehicle. Please contact me at freestolenvehicles shippedtoafrica .com
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CrushPlate)
 
 
 
Not news: School censors Arizona high school year book. News: School officials make students carry out the censorship. Fark: By hand, with duct tape
source: crushplate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
There's suicidal, and there's "stole 17 pit bulls from a yard" suicidal
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
You've gotten cell reception on an Alaskan mountain? Don't try and call your mother to tell her how dangerous the terrain is
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Engineer with far too much time on his hands produces the world's first single-man V8 chainsaw
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
They say a friend's betrayal is the unkindest cut of all, but decapitating your grandfather with a pair of hedge clippers probably runs a close second
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(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Its not everyday you see a ballistic missile fuel tank floating through your yard, but this being Russia why would one be skeptical
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Prince George Free Press)
 
 
 
Hotel amenities: on-premises restaurant, nearby shopping, inordinate amount of bees
source: pgfreepress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Protip: If you're the subject of a manhunt for allegedly stabbing a sailor, don't text your friend that you did it and are afraid your victim will die
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Tue June 10, 2014
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Door-to-door solicitors for the "Children's Joy Foundation" who insist you at least give them the loose change they saw in the cup-holder of your minivan might not be legit
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(KOCO Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
GOP state representative from Oklahoma says he plans to conduct study on expanding the state's execution law to include firing squad, hanging, and electric chair. Next up for consideration: guillotine, rack, and burning at the stake
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(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
"Overall, it's a great neighborhood, but the boa constrictor on the loose has some people concerned for their safety"
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMTW Portland)
 
 
 
If firefighters have to enter your house through a second story window and then shovel a path through trash to try to rescue your sorry ass, you may be a hoarder
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(WDSU New Orleans)
 
 
 
Fundamentals of Armed Robbery Lesson 1 : Remain awake throughout the entire robbery procedure
source: wdsu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Former Colorado police officer convicted of killing trophy elk in case that ignited emotions. No word on how the elk got in the case
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(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
16 employees of Cedar Point Amusement Park tased, arrested for utilizing downtime from sewer main break to hold a 3AM melee in company housing. All those damn Dutch kids from Grand Rapids
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(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
A white public HS teacher insisting black students address him with "yes sir, master" oh you'd better farking BELIEVE that's a firing...except, apparently, in Iowa, at least so long as the teacher is "extremely remorseful" afterwards
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(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
School principal cancels entire summer reading list program, because it contains a book that has a "positive view of questioning authority" and "lauds hacker culture." Pick up that can, student
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(Daily Freeman)
 
 
 
Time was, son, when the local Sunday school parade would go right past the local porno theatre and the local paper would cover it without blinking an eye. This must've been 1982 or so, going by the positioning of the belt-onions
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(The Daily Caller)
 
 
 
NSA says systems are too complex to delete evidence. If that's true I'd like to see some evi..de...oh I get it. Well played, sir. Well played
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(WTVR)
 
 
 
3-year old Virginia boy in critical condition after being shot in an apparent assassination attempt by his presumably evil twin brother
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(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this racing helmet
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(Guardian)
 
 
 
Top ten vegetarian and vegan blogs, as measured by ease of avoidance when compared to getting stuck at Morrissey concert
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(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Torn from the Front Page of the Bangor Daily News: Naked guy and other abuses cause landowner to post her land (w/sfw pics)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
If you left a Lamborghini on fire in New Jersey, please come and sit in it before the police ticket it for being unoccupied
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(Ocala Star-Banner)
 
 
 
Attention people of Florida: Please stop mailing unmarked envelopes filled with artificial sweetener to the local schools and courthouses. They're making some of us nervous. Thank you
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(PennLive)
 
 
 
Parents: Our daughter has been randomly tested for drugs five different times in three years and it always comes up negative, so we're not letting it happen again. School: Fine. We're kicking your daughter out of Honor Society
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(Kotaku)
 
 
 
"There are tons of offbeat crimes. Stuff that is puzzling. Stuff that is odd. Few crimes this year will top this recent arrest in Japan - or, for that matter, involve as many potato chips"
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(Newser)
 
 
 
Man snatched out of boat by crocodile found in entirely predictable place
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(Juneau Empire)
 
 
 
Alaska woman wants daughter's name to be Awesome. Judging from the photo, that's about all she'd have. She better start honing her skills now
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(WFAA Fort Worth)
 
 
 
Nobody cares if you're a 70 year-old woman who likes to watch porn and rub one out in bed. Unless you're a daycare provider and do it while you have a 4 year-old girl in bed with you, then people start to care
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(Metro)
 
 
 
The World Nettle Eating Championships have taken place and we have a big winner with a small trophy. His accomplishment? He put away 80 feet of stinging nettles
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(WTOP)
 
 
 
Congressman undergoes brain surgery
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(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Not unusual: man wonders if Vermeer might have "cheated" his photorealistic paintings. Unusual: spends years to conduct the experiment, even recreating the 17th century furniture in the room
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(Education Week)
 
 
 
Judge strikes down California's laws that protect teachers from being fired over things like pregnancy, ethnicity, and insanity (working in low-income schools)
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(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Not News: Set of twins are born. Fark: Three weeks apart
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(io9)
 
 
 
Chess was once deemed a menace to society. That seems a bit harsh, it wasn't a great musical but it did give us "One Night in Bangkok"
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(Sun News Network)
 
 
 
Three people shot, including police officer in Vancouver. Suspect in custody. And the Canucks weren't even in the playoffs this year
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(My Fox Philly)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when you get caught up in a drug search at the school parking lot because of an alert K9 dog? Being a teacher certainly doesn't help the matter either
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(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
If you're about to embark on a passionate threesome in a car, make sure at least one of you keeps an eye on the handbrake
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(Metronews.ca)
 
 
 
Vroooom WOOOOOWOOOOO Vrooooooooooom SPLAT
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(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pensive Russian thinker
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(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
It would appear the last SF Fark party was a burning success
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(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
This F-bomb you want to drop, I do not think this phrase means what you think it means. Florida also still working through some of the finer details of the 13th amendment
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(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
All that military equipment used for the war in Afghanistan is headed back to the U.S. for use in local law enforcement
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(LA Times)
 
 
 
Five US soldiers killed in friendly-fire airstrike. Doesn't seem so friendly to me
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(WISHTV)
 
 
 
Can't make this manure up: tractor eludes police during hours-long chase
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(Central Maine)
 
 
 
Police arrest Maine man for trespassing in his underwear. I don't get it, it was his underwear
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(Sum Guy)
 
 
 
Chicago Public Schools prom slogan: 'This Is Are Story'
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(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Man gets onto elevator, is dismayed to discover that it's possessed by an evil spirit
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(WRAL)
 
 
 
A Modern Family episode comes to life as wedding is disrupted by wildfire. Quick thinking photographer takes amazing shot before being evacuated
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(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Taking your daughter out for a walk on the beach is a nice idea. That is until you add the drinking, driving, getting in to an accident and fleeing the scene. All while under probation-ordered house arrest
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(USA Today)
 
 
 
Murder conviction in jeopardy because of Facebook posts by a juror during the trial complaining about having to serve on the jury and disparaging the defendant. Can't wait to see his reaction on FB to being sentenced for contempt of court
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(Washington Post)
 
 
 
So it seems that the Jihaddist fighters affiliated with Al-qaeda in Iraq, who left Iraq for the Syrian civil war after incurring heavy losses in fighting Iraqi and US Forces, are back in Iraq after incurring heavy losses fighting Syrian forces
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(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
Man sells cheating wife's wedding dress online: "This stunning, tuille swathed, ivory bridal gown has a proven track record of producing an adulterous, deceitful, double-crossing and traitorous soulmate." Not that he's bitter
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(CBC)
 
 
 
Crowdsourcing effort to raise money to find "the truth" behind MH370 expected to take off sharply before veering wildly off course, disappearing from radar and falling into oblivion
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(STLToday)
 
 
 
Archbishop claims he had no idea sex with children was a crime
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(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Yarn bomber hits Edinburgh, adorning controversial streetcar stops in fuzzy, unhappy blankets (pic)
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(Think Progress)
 
 
 
What happens when you apply for an immigration visa for your daughter to enter the U.S. the correct way? She waits on line for 21 years only to get turned away for being too old
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(Big Dog 95.9)
 
 
 
Head NBA Ref says there are no conspiracies to rig NBA games. Or so he says
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(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
No matter what you may think, injecting your equines with gasoline will not increase their horsepower
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(CNN)
 
NewsFlash
 
Oh good, I was worried we'd get through a week without a school shooting. I don't handle change well
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(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
How Thomas Kinkade, America's 'Painter Of Light' is more successful than ever, two years after he drank himself to death
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STV.tv)
 
 
 
Drunken businessman wearing lederhosen chews the ear off a former World's Strongest Man finalist at Oktoberfest event in Scotland. "The night finished up with someone biting my ear off. It wasn't entirely pleasant"
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(KZBB Fort Worth)
 
 
 
Statute of limitations be damned, descendants of 18th century Spaniards want a share of revenues from Texas oil fields
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(UPI)
 
 
 
Man arrested for sexting police officer after initially calling about suspicious vehicle
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(Metronews.ca)
 
 
 
Why small fish like sardines are the healthiest. Subby hasn't read the article, but presumes it's because they're so easy to bread, deep-fry and put on a stick
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(Hot Air)
 
 
 
The IRS may have violated federal tax law
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(Jim Romenesko)
 
 
 
NPR stations given heads up that network will refer to California Chrome's ownership group "Dumbass Partners" on air without bleeping, and that they should handle offended church ladies as appropriate
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(Descrier)
 
 
 
Britain proposes fining drivers caught speeding £10,000 in attempt to make sure drivers caught speeding never, ever stop for the police
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(TechEBlog)
 
 
 
Life hacks for students. NO this doesnt involve tricks for winning or losing beer pong
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(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Somebody murdered someone in a strip club over...a) sleeping with somebody's girlfriend...b) they owed them money...or c) they were asked to move so someone could make a pool shot
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Lego executives use customized mini figures as business cards. No word on whether the dumb ones are given Duplo figures, instead
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(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
When a journalist started seeing signs made of plywood with pink hearts painted on them she decided to investigate thinking it might be an interesting story... not knowing that it was all put together by her boyfriend as a way to propose
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(Northern Gwinnett News)
 
 
 
Officer gives woman benefit of the doubt by allowing her to expose her breasts multiple times before deciding she has, in fact, committed indecent exposure
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