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Sun May 18, 2014
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Beer lollipops are many things, the epitome of human innovation, the height of candy science, but unfortunately, alcohol-free
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
If you live in Washington, and like Hitler, have I got some good news for you
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Carl Sagan Portal)
 
 
 
"Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey" episode 11 discussion thread and drinking game. 9PM Eastern on Fox
source: carlsagan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Batgirl
source: 31.media.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Modesto Bee)
 
 
 
*face palm*
source: modbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Transgendered teen held in prison for months without charges for the crime of being different. Oh, and for assaulting 11 different people. But activists SWEAR it's about the transgender stuff
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Income inequality isn't necessarily a bad thing
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Emperor responsible for downing of Flight MH370 during Thai Fighter training mission
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
College snowflakes now need warning labels on books, because every sentence doesn't comfort them like warm milk and pink fuzzy bunny slippers, and big scary words might send them into traumatic fits
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
That's crazy
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Blaze)
 
 
 
The Blaze is shocked -- SHOCKED -- that the 9/11 memorial has a gift shop, because people died there. After all, we don't have gift shops near Gettysburg or Niagara Falls or any other place where people died
source: theblaze.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
"Where unsold cars go to die" article is BS
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
"It must have been hackers," Hooters claims after demeaning images of women appeared on its Facebook page. "They're always coming into our stores with their fancy camera-phones"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sleepy head
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
MERS has made its way to Illinois, where CDC experts warn it may become corrupted
source: voices.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Dangerous Dogs Act has come into force. Owners can be prosecuted and jailed if anyone feels threatened if your Corgi jumps on them, even in your own home. Law possibly written by H. Ello Kitty
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
Rolling Stone decides to get outraged over the juvenile justice system, claiming children are tried in "kangaroo courts" for adult crimes. Rolling Stone should stick to reporting things they know about, like...well. This is awkward
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Voters in liberal paradise overwhelmingly reject minimum wage increase. Where is your cause now?
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
For 25 years this cave digger has been carving through New Mexico's sandstone. Still keeps missing left turn at Albuquerque
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
New neurons result in erased memories
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
"You can't destroy a community like this. My heart goes out to kids with autism. But no one told me they'd be leaving the house"
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Meet the men behind the Ben & Jerry's flavors. Subby is still waiting for Sriracha surprise
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
The oil shale boom in the US and Canada might make us independent of OPEC oil but you didn't think that would stop oil companies from using OPEC's artificially high prices did you? Ha ha
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guyism)
 
 
 
Men are having an increasingly hard time avoiding sex
source: guyism.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
20,000 bees attach themselves to a car, hoping to hitch a ride to Pollenesia
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CP24 Toronto)
 
 
 
Man steals 5 jackets from store, security chases him, he hops on bike, gets hit by car, car fails to stop, driver charged with hit and run, passenger charged with drug possession, and hit and run victim charged with theft. THE ARISTOCRATS
source: cp24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Best families in Best Korea can move into apartment complexes even before they're finished, which sometimes doesn't end well
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Info Wars)
 
 
 
Rio's new "World Cup" Police look exactly like secret police SWAT eams from Terry Gilliam's Brazil
source: infowars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Did the supermarket cashier hurt your feelings over a misunderstanding? When the Sun isn't there, we have the Metro
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
More people suffer serious head injuries in car accidents than in bike accidents. So why do all the mandatory helmet laws only target bicyclists?
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this casual bike ride
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Note to oxy thieves: those pill bottles you stole from the drugstore just might be cleverly disguised GPS devices that lead the NYPD right to your Jeep Compass, and those guys tend to be a little shooty when you draw a gun on them
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
'Of course I didn't know what she was talking about, I was still half sleeping. He was just swimming around in circles, He tried to get up here for awhile, [but] I think he was a little intimidated with everybody watching, too
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Hollywood portrays prom night as a magical rite of passage, an evening of romance and passion, the time when a boy blossoms into a young man. But Hollywood glosses over the part about finding your date dead in your hotel bed the next morning
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Man with a gun on his hip is checking out at a Walmart in Phoenix. Since this is Fark, guess what happens next
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWLP)
 
 
 
Man participating in a heart walk has a heart attack. Is saved by a fast thinking cardiologist and a dose of being in the right place at the right time
source: wwlp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
The parking situation in Central London is so bad.... Well I'll just let the pictures do the talking
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Dog alerts family to fire at a exotic animal rescue shelter, allowing the family to get all but 2 of the animals out unharmed. He may not ask for a steak but he certainly does deserve one
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
The earth hungering for more opens up in York, Pennsylvania this time and chooses a parked car to snack on
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWLP)
 
 
 
It's been 10 years since Massachusetts made it legal for everyone to be equally miserable in the holy bonds of matrimony
source: wwlp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
An interview with the whacky mastermind of International Masturbation Month. Hopefully they didn't shake hands
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global Post)
 
 
 
The Ukrainian army abandons a fully armed, functional tank in the middle of a busy street. Curious civilians: Hey, what does this button do?
source: globalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Prisons still experimenting with capital punishment
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Lawyer representing the douche that broke a porn star's foot while throwing her off the roof into a pool responds to her lawsuit in fantastically sarcastic fashion
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Family sues BART after a worker was struck and killed by a train. When contacted for comment BART laughed and said they could eat his shorts
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
In response to drug smuggling at Texas fracking sites, Border Patrol sets up "Integrated Frontline Resources Awareness Campaign". That's right, I-FRAC
source: news.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Why zero-tolerance rules in school are worse than slavery, Jim Crow laws and lynchings
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
10 year old Oklahoma girl held down by female classmate while classmate's 8 year old brother rapes her. That's never OK
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Neighbors witness a blizzard of police activity as armed man robs Dairy Queen
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
I need a ruling- cat just stuck his foot in my scotch. Drink it anyway, or drink it anyway and call kitty AA?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
"The mental health system has failed this young boy" Says attorney Dennis Scott, who represented a mentally ill 13-year-old boy who was released without treatment after spending 2 weeks in the ER while the hospital tried to figure out what to do
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
The KEEEE-EEEEE seventeen year cicKEEEE-EEEEE KEEEE-EEEE cicadas are back and in KEEEE-EEEEE KEEEE-EEEEE KEEEE-EEEEE full force this year KEEEE-EEEEE KEEEE-EEEEE KEEEE-EEEEE KEEEE-EEEEE GODDAMMIT SHUT UP
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 17, 2014
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Man arrested for trying to teach his daughter how to swim
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Having a nice day in Manitoba walking side by side with two of your friends? That's a $113 ticket
source: winnipeg.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lincoln Journal Star)
 
 
 
A six-foot emu on the loose for weeks finally brought down by police who were able to shoot and kill it, ending the gigantic menace once and for all
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News On 6 Tulsa)
 
 
 
Even if you think that your ex-girlfriend is a pig, that doesn't mean that you can spiral slice her finger down to the bone, while trying to get her to tell you where your stolen drugs are at
source: newson6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
The California Highway Patrol has rolled out their new 'Click-It or Ticket' campaign by doing what? A) Going to schools to teach seat-belt safety. B) Producing a commercial or C) Releasing a hip-hop song to promote safe driving habits
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Take a break from politics, rape, murder, mayhem, outrage and rape to look at the cutest pics of baby animals EVER. Subette wants to nuzzle the snout of the piglets
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
50 years since Britain's Brighton Beach Bank Holiday Battles, where the only losers were the bellboys
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pointy wall art light thingee
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
You can love or hate the man, but when his dog dies you just have to sympathize
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Fitness blogger who went from hot to uber hottie after losing 70lbs has her before and after photos stolen and used to sell diet pills for the second time this year (with pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
It's bad enough that they're snatching up all our money, our real estate, and our production factories. But now the Chinese are taking all the American bourbon
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Alright, we're breaking up. You can have the furniture. I want the car and the embryos
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cargo carrier
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Brooklyn building being rebuilt into haven for swingers. With helpful pic of what that almost certainly will NOT look like. (probably safe for work. probably)
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Today's Fark ready headline: Alligator helps catch suspected car thief in Florida
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Headlines that sound like someone threw a bunch of random words together: "Bitcoin bigwigs begin bailing after ex-Disney star is elected to lead trade group"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
In 1611, astronomer Johannes Kepler interviewed 11 candidates to be his future wife. He would have been much more successful had he'd applied the correct mathematical strategy to solve "The Marriage Problem"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stars and Stripes)
 
 
 
Here's what a $1 million US-paid-for soccer field in Iraq looks like
source: stripes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Roadtrippers)
 
 
 
Want to spend the night at a creepy abandoned Wizard of Oz theme park? Well, now you can, for only $165 per night. THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME, THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME (w/pics)
source: roadtrippers.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Guy has heart attack at bar, do you a) call 911, b) perform CPR, or c) steal his wallet and hit on his girlfriend?
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
World's biggest dinosaur discovered "will be named describing its magnificence." Chucknorrisaurus has a nice ring to it
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
Oh, look: it's AN_T_ER ST_R_ A___T D___ASS _ER_ T__ERA__E ___I_IES
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Experts claim pornography should be considered as dangerous as drugs and alcohol because it causes major illness, hairy palms, and carpal tunnel syndrome
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CrushPlate)
 
 
 
Welcome back, fun guy. Swiss researcher says he's one study away from proving magic mushrooms can treat depression
source: crushplate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(When On Earth)
 
 
 
In America you go to a gym if you want to relax in a sauna. In Finland you go to a boat with a trampoline on its roof floating on an icy lake if you want to relax in a sauna
source: whenonearth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Take a deep breath, look in the mirror, and honestly ask yourself: 'Would I rather buy a Ferrari or a personal helicopter?'
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
In America all it takes to be a journalist is a cell phone camera and an internet connection. In South Korea you must pass a written exam, spend endless hours at the police station reading incident reports, and endure beratings by senior reporters
source: business.asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
Because who wouldn't want to stand at the top of a 420-foot observation tower surveying the scenic majesty that is known by mere mortals as 'downtown Phoenix'
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
In the wake of the botched lethal injection in Oklahoma last month, Utah has a suggestion: Bring back the firing squad
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Create a new constellation in the night sky
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WAFF Huntsville)
 
 
 
A cat in Nashville is recovering from being shot in both front legs and is ready for a peaceful Caturday. But he says he won't truly rest until he finds the man who shot his paw
source: waff.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
"As a child psychologist who has been found in possession of child porn, you can no longer practice. Except on adults. That's cool"
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(41 Action News)
 
 
 
"Witnesses say three women walked into a Burger King and ordered food, and moments later got into an argument over the freshness of a cinnamon roll. That's when the gun came out"
source: kshb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Perhaps it was the fireworks. Perhaps it was the booze. Possibly a combination of the two that made Patrick "Wild" Cunningham fire his newly invented torpedo down the High Street
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Texas man charged with smuggling (a) heroin, (b) guns, or (c) dead hummingbirds
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
That house you bought nine years ago for 250,000 euro? Well the Jew who built it in 1939 didn't file the proper paperwork with the German government. So it has to be torn down
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Mom who loves her son too much to let him be exposed to raunchy music at McDonald's apparently doesn't love him enough to not feed him McDonald's
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 11 Online)
 
 
 
Father is concerned his daughter is being bullied in kindergarten and believes the school isn't doing anything to prevent it. So a restraining order on the 5 year old 'bully' is a perfectly rational response
source: fox11online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
If you were driving around New Orleans chucking rabbits out the window, the SPCA would like to have a word with you
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTUU Alaska)
 
 
 
Neosporin: Good for scrapes, burns, gunshot wounds to the head....wait, what?
source: ktuu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 16, 2014
(Fark)
 
 
 
Dear Red: if you're reading this, you've gotten through the week. And if you've come this far, maybe you're willing to come a little further. You remember the stories for the Friday Fark Quiz, don't you?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Okay, now I think the rich are just mocking us: Casino mogul Steve Wynn pays $28 million for an unbelievably ugly statue of Popeye by an artist whose stainless steel rendering of a balloon dog recently sold for $58 million
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Shotgun weddings. New hotness: Ambush weddings
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The best way for men to fight sexism is to wear short shorts
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ohio.com)
 
 
 
43 year-old-man breaks into home of 83-year-old woman to profess his love. Who says romance is dead?
source: ohio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Airliner pilot dives 600 ft avoid colliding with another airliner. Your scary air stories to the right
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Student photo will not be included in yearbook because student was wearing a bow tie. Should have also worn a fez
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this meditating mutt
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Olean Times Herald)
 
 
 
Drunk and disorderly is no way to go through your work day, Mrs. Elementary School Librarian
source: oleantimesherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Florida high school coach steals $950 from players' wallets, says he was just preparing his athletes for dealing with an agent
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
When craft goes creepy
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Gays have had their chance in the discrimination spotlight. Now it's time to focus on the true victims: Hillbillies in higher education
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Calcutta Telegraph (India))
 
 
 
Man killed in the middle of doing yoga. Police do not believe the murder was pre-meditated
source: telegraphindia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DNA Info)
 
 
 
Listen drunk guy, the least you can do when stealing a limo with people inside is to offer them something from the bar and ask where they'd like to go
source: dnainfo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Man chokes 7-11 cashier before robbing the store in order to demonstrate the awesome power of the Dark Side
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Some brains are just wired for sex, scientists say. See, honey?
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Above the Law)
 
 
 
Man plans Supreme Court hunger strike for freedom to post noodz online
source: abovethelaw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
GM decides that maybe some more of that overreaching government regulation isn't so bad at all
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Pamela Anderson: Busty pinup model, home movie porn star, b-list actress, tabloid staple, and philanthropist
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
Millennials have realized that the stock market is a sucker's bet designed to enrich Wall Street middlemen and the super-wealthy at the middle class' expense- and that is freaking out this boomer columnist who was hoping to cash in his 401(K) soon
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Kos)
 
 
 
Obamacare putting yet another clinic out of business
source: dailykos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Vatican urges bishops to consider arguments in favor of married priests, the Eucharist for the divorced, and homosexuality. In other news, Satan puts on ice skates
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Totally sane man sues for the completely reasonable sum of $2 undecillion dollars
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
More evidence emerges that, regarding the creation of the universe and so-called "Big Bang," scientists actually have no idea what they're talking about. Hey, but keep on mocking the creationists, smart guys
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MTC)
 
 
 
The fossil fuel divestment movement is really about creating "a long-lasting antipathy to fossil fuel companies in particular and to capitalism in general among today's college students"
source: mindingthecampus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(14 News Evansville)
 
 
 
Woman has her wheelchair stolen, then brought back but with missing screws, a unattached seat and a battery that was tampered with. Gets a surprise when she is given a brand new wheelchair for free. Why is it so dusty in here?
source: 14news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yandex.ru)
 
 
 
Photoshop this slightly unusual beach house
source: img-fotki.yandex.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
 
 
 
Good: Expanding 911 service to accept text messages. Fark: First 911 text message is from someone illegally texting and driving
source: triblive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
New bill would provide increased care for 194353457 military children with autism
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Divers searching for bodies of people who died in two separate ships that sunk find two of the dead in a loving embrace with their arms wrapped around each other (some pics are not safe for work)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
From the "How could this possibly ever have seemed like a good idea?" desk: Ad agency apologizes for mattress ad that depicted a cartoon version of the shooting of 16-year old Pakistani human rights activist Malia Yousafzai
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Pro tip: Don't drive your camouflaged minivan with 'missiles' on top near the airport
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times Press Recorder)
 
 
 
Bear wanders past baseball game which evidently failed to hold his attention. Park officials hope to trap him by staging soccer game that will bore him to sleep
source: timespressrecorder.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Drones aren't nearly as scary when they deliver champagne to you
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda)
 
 
 
Russia may ban Twitter any time, any day, because it's bad
source: english.pravda.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
All that fish oil you're consuming? Well, if you're consuming it because you love, love, love it, then everything's peachy. If you're consuming it for that whole "protect against heart disease" thing, well, then, I've got some bad news for you
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
Actually, this sounds like a pretty good use for a personal drone
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Concept artist recreates Statue of Liberty in 250 pieces around NYC. Inspired thief steals a 40-pound piece, leaving behind an inscription reading "Gimme your scrap metal, your wallet, your phone, your shoes, your jewelry yearning to be pawned"
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Most food fads are stupid, but Subby is more than ready to bow down to our upcoming Poutine Overlords
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS San Francisco)
 
 
 
Hacked road sign warns drivers: "Godzilla Attack - Turn Back"
source: sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
...and the latest person to sue a fracking company is a rabbit breeder who says its low-flying helicopters terrorized her animals which led to many bad things with them
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
To fully understand why rich people are rich and poor people poor, all you need to do is put Scrooge McDuck and Donald on an island and drop them some corn
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
14-year-old German teen who committed 30 crimes in three months is being watched around the clock by a team of private security guards at a cost of $3,000 because he is too young to be sent to youth prison and too dangerous to be left alone
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
A reminisce into 1980's anti-authority punk rock, following with the question of "what went wrong?"
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when the movers hit a power line with their truck and everything you own burns up in a fire so hot it melts the siding off surrounding houses?
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man learns there's no such thing as an anonymous online death threat after sending one to a prosecutor
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(8 News Now)
 
 
 
Officer: ''you didn't see any kids drinking did you?' And I said, yeah I did. And he said, 'no you didn't,'' - federal lawsuit against police department allowed to proceed in death of Farkette's friend
source: 8newsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: I told everyone that my teacher hurt me and she got fired because of my allegations. Problem was, I was lying and I kinda feel bad about it. Should I say something or am I okay forgetting all about it?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Emily Blunt took Tom Cruise to a sex club called "The Box." Hm. Usually he's against going anywhere near the box
source: blog.seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Ever notice the name Faber-Castell on your pencils? Well, he's a rich German Count and his son just landed a super hot Aussie blonde
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Yorker)
 
 
 
One company is by far the largest filer of copyright-infringement lawsuits in the US and it's pretty much who you figured it would be
source: newyorker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Management Today (UK))
 
 
 
Rupert Murdoch is merging the companies that make MasterChef, Big Brother and American Idol to create one single reality-TV production company that will have a vortex of suck so powerful it could swallow light
source: managementtoday.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
News: Denver Police get a tip leading them to men who are dealing heroin and cocaine. Fark: The tip was posted by one of the Mommies on the "Highlands Mommies" website. Finally, someone thought of the Children
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Is country music dead? "There appears to be not even the slightest attempt to "say" anything other than to repeat the tired, overused mantra of redneck party boy in his truck, partying in said truck, hoping to get lucky in the cab of said truck"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
The first reviews of the Godzilla movie are coming in and British critics are called it "a po-faced remake." When the hell did the English stop speaking it?
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
This boy is "very, very lucky" that he survived a fall from a third-story window. No charges will be filed, but the boy's brother rumored to be grounded big-time
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
The family that gets struck by lightning together stays positive together
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
It's hard to have a good dinner party in Australia. Guests have to travel long distances to get there, food can be expensive and just when everything seems perfect, a python starts swallowing a kangaroo in the yard, ruining the whole ambiance
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Sixty years after school segregation was struck down by the Supreme Court, as many as 90 percent of students are in segregated schools, especially the dusky-hued ones in the South. Take that, Brown v Board Of Education
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Gas prices are so outrageous thieves have turned to siphoning gas directly from gas stations
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Family whose son was attacked by their neighbor's vicious pit bull but rescued by his cat will not sue the owners of the dog in a rare moment of common sense
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this launching rocket
source: imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
SeaWorld employee commits a whale of a crime, stealing cash and credit cards from customers who were already robbed when they bought a ticket
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda)
 
 
 
Russian men shave their beards to prove they are not bearded 'Sausage' from Austria
source: english.pravda.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chattanooga Pulse)
 
 
 
"The people of Europe figured this out before electric lighting was available, yet here we are...and those people put freakin' mayonnaise on their fries"
source: chattanoogapulse.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Chicagoans freaking out because it's May 16th and snow is falling in the west suburbs
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
We don't know exactly how Tara the Cat is going to throw out the first ball at a minor league game, but we've seen how she handled that dog and saved the boy, so we know she'll get it done
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
It's going to be a mild summer this year with no freak weather disturbances now that the Air Force plans to dismantle HAARP in a couple of months
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Are you a fan of Howard Hughes? Have you ever wanted to live like a recluse on the shores of Lake Tahoe? Do you happen to have $19.5 million just laying around?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"Ladies and gentlemen, if you look out the left side of the aircraft you'll see... uh, better yet, just look out the right side"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS San Francisco)
 
 
 
San Francisco casting call held for documentary film exploring public trends ... wait, did I say public? No, no. pubic, yeah, pubic trends. Pubes
source: sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWLP)
 
 
 
Millennials don't always suck: Roommates buy lumpy couch from Salvation Army, find $40K stuffed inside, locate original owner...and give money back
source: wwlp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Schools are allowed to charge you for your children's records, but the price has to be "small enough that it doesn't prevent a parent from obtaining the record." Which explains why this guy was charged $10,000
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It's all fun and games 'til you get buried alive in a shallow grave by your landscaper
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
This 34-year-old woman passed herself off as a 15 year-old sophomore to attend an East Texas high school. And it wasn't a high school for the blind
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 15, 2014
(Israel National News)
 
 
 
Egypt would like you to know that Communism and Tom & Jerry were invented by the ancient Egyptians and that they also built all the pyramids 200 years before the dates of the oldest ones
source: israelnationalnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
One, ONE in-flight groping. Two, TWO in-flight gropings. Three, THREE in-flight gropings. AH-AH-AH
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South Florida News-Press)
 
 
 
Actual headline: FL woman who has been in the news for living "off the grid" believed singing George Michael's "Faith" would help her dog
source: news-press.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
The people of Walmart continue to show their metal. This time it's a homeless woman 'shopping' with a crowbar and beating the hell out of a 4-year-old girl
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vanity Fair)
 
 
 
Chipotle to put original short stories and essays by literary luminaries such as George Saunder, Toni Morrison, and Jonathan Safron Foer on their drink cups, chip bags, and sandwich wrappers so people can have something to read while eating
source: vanityfair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CrushPlate)
 
 
 
Judge orders pig to be removed from Slaughter's house
source: crushplate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
What happens when a drone gets sucked into a jet engine? Well, remember that video of a brick being thrown into a washing machine?
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Science)
 
 
 
Study says short men are longer where it counts
source: popsci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Beekeeper tries to introduce a couple of new queen bees to the hives in her backyard. Since this is Fark, you can guess how that plan went
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PCWorld)
 
 
 
Old and busted: swords to ploughshares. New hotness: microchips to lettuce
source: pcworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: High School graduation gone wrong
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PNSN)
 
 
 
Mt. Rainier is now the most seismically active volcano in the lower 48. Suck it St. Helens (LGT plot of earthquakes showing all the activity under the mountain)
source: pnsn.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
No beer is worth killing over, especially not a Natural Ice
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
"I pulled you over because you went through a stoplight. Can I see your license?" "It's in my wallet, the one that says bad motherfarker." "I have to let you go now"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Jealous losers say rich people are jerks, and by jealous losers I mean psychologists
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas Observer)
 
 
 
How to tell if you're a dad at a rock concert: 1) Are you a dad at a rock concert?
source: blogs.dallasobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Dear Parents, Your daughter, Pistol, is in violation of our school's No Tolerance Policy. She is expelled forever. Next time pick a normal name, like Vanellope or Burklee
source: living.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Beerpulse)
 
 
 
Shiat just got real: Stone Brewing evacuated
source: beerpulse.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Data show that God hates Bike to Work Day
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
TSA posting warning signs to travelers about MERS next to the machines that will give you cancer so they can look at you naked. Enjoy your delayed flight
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
On-duty air marshal protects and serves... and takes upskirt photos
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Man gives himself a tattoo by letting a thousand bedbugs feed on his arm
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Memorial Day is coming up fast and it's already grilling time. Do you go fancy or keep it cheap and easy? Help your fellow Farkers gear up for grill season and start off with a bang
source: lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Joran van der Sloot taking a stab at marriage; says he's found the woman that's been missing all his life. Tag is for the bride to be
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: High School graduation gone right
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Headline that clearly fell through a wormhole from an alternate reality: "Creationist Ken Ham: Atheists love 'pagan' Pat Robertson for making Christians looks silly"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Japan loosening reins on military? European politician annexing large portions of neighbor? Why does this feel familliar?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Brandon Sun)
 
 
 
Custody battle over large herd of cattle results in horribly pun-filled article
source: brandonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN News UK)
 
 
 
See the violence inherent in the system
source: news.uk.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
One might be led to believe that ferries aren't the safest form of public transportation
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global Post)
 
 
 
Meet the first woman to practice law in Pakistan's conservative Swat Valley. But do it quickly
source: globalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
10 year old boy finds 10 thousand in cash in hotel room and does the right thing by turning it in to police, and learns a valuable lesson early in life
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bit9)
 
 
 
So, what really happens on your computer when you download free stuff from the Internet? (Spoiler: it's not good.)
source: blog.bit9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBOY Clarksburg)
 
 
 
In the least shocking news of the day, it turns out that WV mine that was the scene of an accident Tuesday that killed two, had a long history of safety violations and MSHA was one step away from seeking a court order to shut it down completely
source: wboy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Gay marriage is legal in Arkansas. But clerks will be fined for issuing licenses
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
Turns out that Hillbilly Heroin is not Oxycontin. Hillbilly Heroin is Heroin
source: cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Manchester Evening News)
 
 
 
Well the convicted sex offender who was hired to frisk passengers at Manchester airport has finally been sacked, but what about the brain dead people that hired him in the first place?
source: manchestereveningnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
One in four Germans deemed anti-Semitic. That's a high concentration
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
I am shocked, SHOCKED, that in Australia even the people in charge of the schools are foul-mouthed
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The US government has a plan to battle the zombie apocalypse, whether they are brain-eating zombies, chicken zombies, or vegetarian zombies
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 2 Fort Myers)
 
 
 
Not news: Man stabs wife repeatedly. Florida: Immediately after their marriage counseling session
source: nbc-2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
NewsFlash
 
FCC: You know how we said we'd reconsider this net neutrality paid priority thing? We lied
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
How Twitter has turned into the world's largest and most accurate seismometer, because the only thing that people tweet more about than what they are having for lunch are earthquakes
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Corrupt politicians, bad doctors and child molesters flood Google with requests to take down information about themselves in wake of European court ruling
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Military turns down 80% of its applicants. Congress expresses surprise that one out of five can pass the physical
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Killer's lawyer doesn't want media to report that his illegal immigrant client had state funded health care, according to media report
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Flappy Bird creator realizes that he misses getting $50k/day in revenues
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Man discovers the hard way that making threatening tweets to U.S. House Speaker John Boehner about wanting to kill his wife is a lot funnier when you're drunk
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Couple given double cheeseburgers laced with marijuana at McDonald's, return to ask for more fries
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Lack of women in states such as Kansas and Nebraska turning flyover states into world's largest open-air sausagefest
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Teen charged with bong attack, murdering a plate of cookies, really harshing everyone's mellow, man
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Castle Wolfenstein is a documentary
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
US military prepares to invade Los Angeles
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
If you know the difference between club soda, seltzer water, and tonic water, congratulations: You're an alcoholic
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Here's what America would look like if melting polar ice raised sea levels by just 12 feet. Hope tens of millions of you own a good pair of water wings
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this abandonment
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
"You were conceived on an IKEA bed"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
"Marijuana is not a boon for Florida agriculture," says Florida's Agriculture Commissioner. "There won't be fields of it growing in the state or pot shops on every corner next to gymnastics studios and tae kwon do studios where our kids are"
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
When real life resembles a comic book: Vladimir Putin's mortal nemesis is a handsome and rugged expert on bats
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(14 News Evansville)
 
 
 
Can't pay child support to your four children? That's no unprotected sex for you for the duration of your probation.... Unless you can come up with $100,000 in overdue support
source: 14news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Increase your prowess in the sack using this one offal trick
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
An age old problem: Should men shave their faces up or down?
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Millennials aren't actually as narcissistic as everyone thought. Somebody give them a trophy
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
All I said to my wife was "That Mugshot Roundup was good enough for Jehovah"
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Hey, hold my beer and shoot me so we can try out this old bullet proof ves- *BANG*"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Hrmmm, well I guess it's time to head down to the high-school gym and have my vagina inspected
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Everyone's favorite mad scientist celeb chef Alton Brown shows you how to make a grilled cheese sandwich... in case you've been making it wrong all these years
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
"Mutant super-rats tried to eat my baby" isn't an 'over the top' headline at all
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
It's typical for a child to ask his parents to check under the bed for monsters, but not for sex offenders
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
First-grade class talent show performance of 'YMCA' cancelled for being 'racist'
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
If you're going to have an affair with a coworker, 1. Make sure the phone you use for your sexy text messages isn't linked to your wife's iPad, 2. Don't be having your affair while you're on duty as a sheriff's deputy
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 471: "Look to the Skies 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 14, 2014
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Move to Alaska and experience the breathtaking views, the abundant seafood, the bears eating your Chihuahua in your backyard
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Riverfront Times)
 
 
 
A Missouri reporter picked up a pile of human poop on TV with her bare hands
source: blogs.riverfronttimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Eleven ways you can travel like Jack Bauer before RUNNING OUT OF TIME
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Well, it's been 2 whole days since the Washington Monument's grand re-opening after 3 years of reconstruction following the earthquake, so you know what it's time for, right? ELEVATOR BREAKDOWN, WOO-HOO
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Miami)
 
 
 
I'm calling bullcrap. I've been licking dog faces and letting dogs lick my face since forever. The black blood seeping from my ears is unrelated
source: miami.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Japan News)
 
 
 
Mild-mannered dentist moonlights as pro wrestler and MMA fighter, donates all his winnings to purchase polio vaccines for children in developing countries
source: the-japan-news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
63-year-old Michigan hipster was into child pornography when it was still underground
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newstalk KZRG)
 
 
 
Not news: Cops pull girl over for driving erratically down Route 66. News: Girl was 8 years old and grabbed wheel because mom had passed out behind the wheel
source: newstalkkzrg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
Having a bad day: Loosing your keys and then finding that your car with $4,000 worth of camera gear was stolen overnight. Having a Fark day: The thieves post to your Facebook page (as yourself) taunting you with pictures of your stolen stuff
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Challenge: create the perfect view through the window
source: th05.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Powerful undead lord seeks to increase his armies
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
He wanted to raise £10,000 for the Teenage Cancer Trust. Instead he's raised over £3.2 million. R.I.P. Stephen Sutton, aged 19
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Lemme see your Thin Mint permit, cutiepie
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
Meh: Navy weapons facility threatened by San Diego wildfire. Shiat just got real: Legoland evacuated
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Welcome to Fark 101. Today's lesson "The Five Steps of Inebriation"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Science)
 
 
 
Do you like bananas? Not for long, you won't
source: popsci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Campus Reform)
 
 
 
Harvard's Kennedy School of Government will require mandatory "power and privilege" training for students, because how else are they to relate to the peons of the world?
source: campusreform.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press & Sun Bulletin)
 
 
 
Good: picking up a friend who was just released from jail. Bad: taking your friend's place because you drove there drunk and with an already suspended license
source: pressconnects.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Awl)
 
 
 
Cereal: It's not what's for breakfast anymore
source: theawl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this "firenado"
source: media2.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Burma's making a bid to permanently quash the Western stereotype of the peaceful, tolerant Buddhist
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
As number of people who die on the highways drop, the number of people available to be killed in household accidents rises, and so the balance of nature is maintained
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Estately)
 
 
 
These are the states full of people that can't shut the &%@# up about CrossFit
source: blog.estately.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "Autopsy: University of Arizona killed in fall while climbing tower on dormitory roof was drunk." RIP University of Arizona
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DCist)
 
 
 
"American Spring" organizers expect 10 million protesters to descend upon Washington DC this Friday. Approximately 10 million. Like, really really approximate
source: dcist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Media critic doesn't want to be married anymore so he files for divorce. Neglects to tell his soon to be ex-wife who finds out during a interview. 'Well, this is the first time I've heard of it'
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Woman charged with robbing a pharmacy, with "Who me?" mugshot goodness
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
British nutritionists urge British residents to stop eating British food if they want to live
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Man's best friend; dog. Boy's best friend; cat
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
WHO: MERS not sers, no1curs
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Man admits stealing underwear from circus, tells court he was almost certain he had Step 2 figured out
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
FBI agent who shot and killed the dude in Florida with connections to the alleged Boston Marathon Bombers? Yeah, he has a "troubled history." Really? A Boston FBI agent has a troubled history? This is my shocked face :-|
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Game of Thrones author George RR Martin writes all his books on a 30-year-old computer which can't connect to the internet. Presumably so he doesn't accidentally read a spoiler online
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Flouting international labor laws, children forced to work on North China tobacco farms, routinely poisoned from contact with pesticides and nicotine ... wait, no, not North China. I meant North *Carolina* tobacco farms
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
If you recently dug up a coffin in a Colebrook, N.H. cemetery and broke into it. The police would like to know, "WHAT IN THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?"
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Three pet goats shot execution style on farm. George W. Bush now searching for new reading material
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Again, it must be said, if you drink wine laced with LSD, YOU CANNOT FLY
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Cool: you can now get that mansion you've wanted your entire life, and it will cost you less than $1,000. Not cool: you have to live in Detroit (pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
So, besides English and Spanish, what's the next most commonly spoken language in your state?
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wales Online)
 
 
 
Today's dumbest bank robber... A) Used a bread knife; B) Wore socks over his shoes; C) Targeted the branch where he had an account; D) Gave the bank his full name and address 30 minutes earlier; E) All of the above (mugshot goodness included)
source: walesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Just when you thought traffic in Chinese cities could not possibly get any worse, someone throws an enormous ostrich into the middle of it
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man goes to Thailand for year to train as a boxer, loses so much weight that he gets black-flagged at airport by immigration officers who didn't believe he was the same person (pics so you can judge for yourself)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
The graduation ceremonies really blow at Arizona State
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
California mulls giving inmates condoms, taking all the fun and danger out of prison rape
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
If you notice some mushrooms growing in cow poop while you're getting wedding photos taken with your fiance, don't take them home to eat later. Unless you don't mind feeling like you're flying for two hours
source: yourhealth.asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If you're going to run a high-end vehicle chop shop, it's probably best not to taunt the cops with a set of 'S2OLUN' vanity plates on your Audi. Or you can be an idiot. Like this guy, for example
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Behold the Holy Traffic Cone. You cannot touch the Holy Traffic Cone. Leave Holy Traffic Cone alone
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Elderly woman's Depends® mistaken for a bomb, prompting shopping center evacuation. After questioning, suspect released on her own incontinence
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Observer)
 
 
 
"It makes me crazy when people without gluten allergies choose to eliminate such things from their diet. If you're lucky enough to be able to eat a muffin and not find yourself in gastrointestinal hell, you should probably just eat the damned muffin"
source: observer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Panda Dogs eats, poops and d'awws
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
New driving laws in Spain impose fines of nearly $1,000 for drivers caught going one kilometre above speed limit. Sheriff's departments in every small town in America intrigued by this idea, would like to know more
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The Vikings are back after a 1,000 year hiatus, and Sweden just became the coolest country in the world in which to live. Meet the new Viking king
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC2News Baltimore)
 
 
 
The crazy person who rammed a truck into Baltimore's ABC affiliate live-tweeted the whole thing
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Roller discos are making a comeback, claims person full of 70s nostalgia and false hope
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Aqua may not have been the greatest of bands, but no one could've guessed that they were prophetic
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Naked, stoned chick does impromptu dance on 11th floor air conditioning unit in China. This is why drugs are bad, mmm'kay? (Not safe for work)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Police pinch "Mystery Pooper"
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
If you're a school board president involved in a contentious meeting and saying disparaging things about the opposition, including calling a parent "chubby wubby," make sure your microphone isn't on
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tea party
source: i.huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It takes guts to wear a bathing suit that shows off your organs
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Selling your son's wrecked Honda Civic for a penny to teach him a lesson about driving dangerously? Whatever it costs cheapo dad, it's worth it for your son
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Journal)
 
 
 
Average Americans think they're smarter than the average American
source: nationaljournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fansided)
 
 
 
Justin Beiber reportedly under investigation by LAPD for armed robbery. Unknown if LA County Jail has a protective unit for pretty Canadian teen idols who think they're "street"
source: fansided.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
Six months after Colorado legalized marijuana, revenue is up and crime is down across the board
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
One U.S. Supreme Court justice referred to Netflix as "Netflick." Another seemed not to know that HBO is a cable channel. A third appeared to think most software coding could be tossed off in a mere weekend
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Australia pleaded with the NSA to help them spy on Australian citizens
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
According to San Diego Fire officials, there's a fire in your pants. Ain't that the truth
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The BarkPost)
 
 
 
Pitbull attacks graduation ceremony. Scratch that, University allows service Pit bull to walk in stead of recently deceased owner. Man is it getting dusty in here
source: barkpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Federal judge rules that Idaho's ban on gay marriage is unconstitutional. Idaho's governor, whose name coincidentally happens to be "Butch," vows appeal, while Idaho's entire openly gay population both celebrate ruling
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 13, 2014
(CBS Boston)
 
 
 
As God as my witness I thought my cousin could fly
source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Mysterious radiation leak caused by (a) rusty containers, (b) tsunami, (c) using wrong brand of kitty litter
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Transformer explodes in Turkish coal mine killing 151, over 200 still missing. Authorities say there may be more than meets the eye
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Six-year-old with mad yo-yo skills puts the amateur "walk the dog" and "around the world" to shame
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WebMD)
 
 
 
Here is another headline about a study that is debunked in the article at a record pace of the second sentence
source: webmd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gaston Gazette)
 
 
 
Woman calls 911 after getting marinara sauce instead of pizza sauce on her flatizza. That's not a euphemism
source: gastongazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
What's so unusual about finding a fetus in a mummy? Isn't that where all babby are formed?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
I'm sorry but my dog did not like the room, my girlfriend's snoring kept me awake and you served me left chicken legs when I specifically ordered right legs therefore I must lodge a complaint
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Homeowner arrested after police trespass into his fenced in yard and shoot his 10 month old puppy
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Japanese author specializes in collecting odd examples of WWII domestic propaganda, such as pics of school principals working naked to show their toughness and patriotism. "Most readers enjoy them. Many have said, 'Oh, this is just like North Korea'"
source: blogs.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Nova Scotia wants to ban eating and driving. Officer Overreaction: "You may as well be chewing on a gun. All that melted cheese and sausage or bacon? It's game over for concentration"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Landscape architecture student designs a city built for people with autism and it comes off resembling Seattle or Austin
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
R.I.P., Herb Lotman, father of the Chicken McNugget
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
New overwhelming DNA evidence will not get this rapist to prison for brutal 1991 rape. Because Florida. That and the statute of limitations on the case has passed
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
There's drunk, and then there's "waking up in a 2 year old's bedroom" drunk
source: toronto.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this suit-wearing hipster into a more appropriate environment
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS8 San Diego)
 
 
 
Thousands of homes ordered to evacuate Bernardo wildfire in California (Developing) (lgt live stream)
source: cbs8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
I have no idea what you're talking about, so here's a bunny eating raspberries
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(OC Weekly)
 
 
 
Hipster chefs really need to stop calling their non-pho dishes "pho"
source: blogs.ocweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WNYT Albany)
 
 
 
Wheeeeeee
source: wnyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stoke Sentinel)
 
 
 
Note to all criminals. CCTV cameras aren't the best item to steal... for reasons which should be obvious
source: stokesentinel.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
FBI uses autistic hacker as cooperating witness to nail members of Anonymous. They also decided not to prosecute after the man's constant invocation of one Judge Wapner
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
"What's that officer? You want me to drive down to the station? Well, I'm pretty wasted, but okay"
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Yorker)
 
 
 
Mark Zuckerberg's $100 million gift elevates Newark's failing schools to a model of educational excellence. Just kidding, they pissed all the money away
source: newyorker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Broward/Palm Beach New Times)
 
 
 
Applebee's has officially created the worst social media app EVER
source: blogs.browardpalmbeach.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Remember that Peoria mayor that launched an abuse-of-power witch hunt over a fake Twitter account? Well, he wishes you wouldn't
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Gazette)
 
 
 
Two women decide to swap places after a sheriff pulls them over for suspicion of drunk driving. It seemed like a great idea since both women were drunk and the cop got two for the price of one
source: thegazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Headlines & Global News)
 
 
 
Dousing yourself in Axe will not help you get a girl pregnant
source: hngn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Right Wing Watch)
 
 
 
Can a stopped watch be half right twice a day? Pat Robertson denies young earth creationism
source: rightwingwatch.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Guess who just set the record for highest grossing crowdfunding series
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PBS)
 
 
 
Two high school students give the world a lesson in tenacity and ingenuity by designing and 3D printing a functionally improved ketchup cap. In return they will receive a lesson in intellectual property theft as Big Condiment will likely steal it
source: pbs.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Guy and girlfriend try to rob gas station using a pair of pliers. Then it