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Sun May 11, 2014
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Deadly gunfire breaks out in the middle of a baby's birthday party. Surprisingly, it wasn't in Florida
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man is forced to leave because he was taking pictures of people in: A) the Amazon, B) North Korea, or C) Manitoba, Canada
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Carl Sagan Portal)
 
 
 
"Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey" episode 10 discussion thread and drinking game. 9PM Eastern on Fox
source: carlsagan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Of all the horrible things you've done to your mother over the years, none are as terrible as the fact when you were an embryo, you were basically a parasite that sucked out all her blood and nutrients. Yes, it's a Feminist Mother's Day apology
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Vacationing...with aliens
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Well between depression, weed, and books on monks and vasectomies, I had to cut me penis off
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Smoking hot 21-year-old molecular biology student experiments with beauty competitions, wins coveted title of Miss Wales: "My first love is genetics and the theory behind it. I'm hoping to go into medical research someday" (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Letters from 1967 written to future generation found. They talk about the invention of the miniskirt a lot and a high school dress code does not allow girls to wear pants
source: daily-times.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Drinking water is a hell of a drug
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
Do you like to pour cold beer into frosty chilled mugs or glasses? You're doing it wrong
source: lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Baltimore)
 
 
 
Elderly couple returns home to find out thieves have taken everything. Why they even took their last can of Who Hash
source: baltimore.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Why yes I'll have an awesome Asian-inspired beef tongue and grilled pork belly burger. Maybe two, I'll gladly pay you on Tuesday. Do WANT
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PBS)
 
 
 
F. Buckminster Fuller rides again
source: pbs.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Ohio woman gives birth to rare 'mono mono' twins. She really loves mono
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kens 5 San Antonio)
 
 
 
And in this corner, hailing from Area 51 ... the uber-secret USAF FLYING DORITO. NACHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
source: kens5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this promotion
source: multimedia.detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canton Repository)
 
 
 
Malone University students are obviously not homeowners because (a) they're students, (b) no student today can expect to ever afford a house, or (c) they feed squirrels
source: cantonrep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
The most heart-warming "Fishermen help deliver 20 adorable hammerhead shark puppies from their dying mother" you'll likely read this week
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Wacky, left-wing fringe group totally buys into all the climate change malarkey. Did we say 'wacky, left-wing fringe group'? We meant the Pentagon
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Apparently $474 million is not enough money for the government to build a functional website
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Cursing found to be good for you as it provides both a creative and emotional outlet. Click on the link if you don't believe it, you motherfarking shiatheaded twatwaffles
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Eagle Tribune)
 
 
 
DHS, city, and county team up to arrest 40 for selling ... counterfeit clothing at flea market? "The safety risks of buying fake goods are real"
source: eagletribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Timmay)
 
 
 
Here are some Dos and Don'ts for travelling in a wheelchair. Surprisingly enough, the list works for anyone, even if you don't travel in a wheelchair
source: handicapthis.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
People who legally smoke medicinal marijuana with a license from their doctor can still be evicted from their apartments for doing it
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
What are terrorists so scared of? Girls reading books
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Woman posts a video to show the effects of bullying on her 8-year-old daughter, who surely won't be bullied any longer after her face is plastered all over the internet
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Socks worn with sandals have finally become fashionable. You knew that if you kept wearing them together for enough years, they finally would
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Under new ownership, Hydrox cookies are about to reappear on store shelves across America. This is bad news for the "inferior-tasting" Oreo
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCTV Tallahassee)
 
 
 
American Lung Association of Florida hosts pub crawl, American Liver Foundation outraged
source: wctv.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Teacher fired for allegedly threatening to kill his co-workers in a mass shooting sues school for wrongful termination, says they should be really glad he can't find his gun right now
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Japanese bar says that bald men do not have toupee full price
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
So, how much do you think a recently discovered Norman Rockwell painting will sell for? Come on, guess
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Would you pass grade school today? Take this 8 question quiz and find out
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
If you really want to tell everyone you've built a green building, then it better be built on a foundation of hempcrete
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Would you be willing to pay $100 if it meant you would never have to touch a germ-encrusted toilet handle again?
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this beary happy fisher
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(City of Portland)
 
 
 
Man who escaped from prison 7 days before he was to be released caught because his eyebrows were way too awesome for freedom
source: portlandoregon.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
A million here, a million there, pretty soon you're talking about real money
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Soshiok)
 
 
 
Just because the Asian food you ate is so spicy it feels like red ants are biting your tongue doesn't mean you should file a complaint with the police
source: soshiok.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Something to get you into the spirit of Mother's Day: pictures of cute-ass baby animals with their moms. Not shown are ones who were eaten before the pictures could be taken
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Not news: Most stores throughout the world will give you a polite message informing you when it is time to close. News: China does this differently. Fark: By playing the same Kenny G song over and over again until you leave
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Centre Daily Times)
 
 
 
In the tradition of the Kardashians, the Paterno family will feed off of the carcass of a dead patriarch in an effort to gain fame, fortune, and futility. We could just ignore them
source: centredaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
There is nothing "liberal" about majoring in Philosophy. Unless you mean the term to describe the stretches of unemployment for said degree holder
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News9 Oklahoma)
 
 
 
Good idea: Putting boxes in police stations to drop off unused prescription medicine. Bad idea: Trying to steal that medicine from the box on camera. Bonus: Suspect's defense
source: news9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Johnson offers up Swallow, judge issues gag order. Sometimes the headlines write themselves
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
UN report says that even when latrines are built in poor countries, 1 billion people still prefer to poop outside. Holy Shiat
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming to you from Juneau, Alaska, it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Two hours of live music hosted by a farker
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Wrap)
 
 
 
Internet troll meets champion heavyweight boxer. Hilarious justice ensues
source: thewrap.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat May 10, 2014
(KGW Portland)
 
 
 
This just in: Kissing your chickens may make you sick and leave a fowl taste in your mouth
source: kgw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 3 Springfield)
 
 
 
Moo means no
source: cbs3springfield.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
Oregon school district survey given to parents asks, "are you gay?"
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
1000 Indonesian masseurs gather to break world record in Bali. Don't worry, this story has a happy ending
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Vigilantes, pissed off at public urinators in Mumbai, are now patrolling the streets with a giant water cannon
source: theconcourse.deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(8 News Now)
 
 
 
If you've been leaving piles of beheaded birds in east Las Vegas, police would like to know WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?
source: 8newsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this gasserby
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
New footage of the Hindenburg disaster discovered
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Yes, I had the fish
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Gay marriage opponents' nightmare comes true as Rambo is the first to get gay married in Arkansas
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 3 Springfield)
 
 
 
I'll see your stolen wheelchair ramp, and raise you a truther stealing a Sandy Hook playground sign---then calling the kid's parents to taunt them
source: cbs3springfield.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Protip: It is perfectly safe to ingest Pop Rocks and Soda, but if you stick any into your vagoo, it's a guaranteed trip to the Emergency Room
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
TSA supervisor arrested for attempting to fly to South America to have sex with underaged girls. (Isn't looking at naked scans and groping travelers enough for some people?)
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
Sheriff that pushed civil forfeiture ordinance finds that having your property seized when you didn't commit the crime really sucks
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Driver who ran over survivor of Asiana Airlines crash sues fire department for revealing she ran over survivor
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Richest)
 
 
 
Five of the most expensive virginities ever sold, brought to you by the /luxury section of TheRichest. Poor men are "johns," rich men are "job creators"
source: therichest.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The Navy comes up with a novel way to defray the national debt. When do we get the penny?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMTW Portland)
 
 
 
Mynd you, møøse bites Kan be pretty nasti
source: wmtw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Step aside, Jacob, you're no longer the most popular boys' name in America. Hellooooo, Noah
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
You might want to sit down for this, but it kinda looks like Comcast's new "$10 per month internet, because we want to help the poors" is less "helping hand" and more "middle finger"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this vacationer on the move
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Clothing-optional book clubs catching on, where topless members read books "from hardboiled crime yarns to ancient-astronaut tracts to the indescribably glorious ABRAHAM LINCOLN, PRESIDENTIAL FARK MACHINE"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Eurovision.TV)
 
 
 
It's time for the Eurovision Song Contest Grand Final live discussion thread. Who will win? The bearded lady? The guy in a hamster wheel? The country duo? The teenage rockers? The butter churn girl? The show starts at 3PM EDT, 9PM CET
source: eurovision.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Private security company helping cops patrol high crime area. What could possibly go wrong?
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Teacher thinks 9 year old is mocking him, so he slaps him, twice. The boy's family lawyer can finally pay off his yacht
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
"The moral panic du jour for my lifetime has been video games, and that panic has been just as stupid and fact-deprived as the rest of them. It started with pinball arcades and, boy, does it offer some perspective on the current panics"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
State DOT: Yes, some tiles came loose in our tunnel, and some debris remains 'unaccounted for' but we're still going to deny your claim from damage to your truck - even though you're the guy who alerted us to the problem when something hit it
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
You work in a restaurant and someone just gave you a $5000 tip. Do you share it with co-workers?
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Miami)
 
 
 
This week's training chapter skipped by American Airlines employees: Chapter 12 - Veterans and their service dogs
source: miami.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Mother is shocked. SHOCKED That her 5 year old son has been banned from playgroup for dressing like a princess
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
From the Snidely Whiplash level of evil department: Connecticut boy stuck in house after someone steals his wheelchair ramp
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Home Schooling may get you a toothy wife, but it won't get you a job once employers realize you don't have a real diploma
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Not only could Kindergarteners one day face misdemeanor charges under proposed California bullying law, but it will be on their PERMANENT RECORD
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Boston DOT encourages drivers changing lanes to "Use Yah Blinkah", are considering adding that using one's blinkah is a "wicked pissah"
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNSNews)
 
 
 
Let's have a nice round of applause for...Chlamydia
source: cnsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Heer Guy)
 
 
 
Wait... your charity WWII reenactment is going to have German soldiers too? Well we can't have that
source: warhistoryonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
"He was doing the Beyonce, the surf board, twerking, the Nae Nae. Every dance that's out there right now, he was doing," said some about the naked man. "I think it's sickening. It's disgusting. It's gross. It's nasty," said others
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Don't you just hate it when you're just trying to get a haircut and someone attempts to kidnap you, which ends with them dead and you being whisked out of the country?
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
Cops discover that Urban Dictionary is good for translating drug dealer's code, finally figure out what 4:20 means
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Hot air balloon hits power line and erupts into fireball. No wreckage has been found and 3 people aboard are missing. CNN starts 24/7 coverage, and wonders if a black hole swallowed the doomed balloon
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BusinessWeek)
 
 
 
+1
source: businessweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this reservations region
source: 31.media.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man who committed murder-suicide had multiple aliases, multiple wives, multiple issues
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Craft beer becomes too mainstream for the hipsters at NPR
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ralphee, a kitten with a neurological disorder, has her very own dedicated nurse to watch over her on Caturday
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
In the future, there will be no cash registers. You will have a microchip implanted in you that deducts the cost from your bank account
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Dads: The perfect counterbalance to helicopter parenting
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
A Peruvian paratrooper survives jumping out of a plane, which technically is his job
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
DEA holds man in jail for two weeks after mistaking him for someone else. This isn't a repeat from when they did this to him six years ago
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
And if you look out to the left, ladies and gentlemen, you will see a military drone about to smash into our plane
source: tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Colorado Symphony Orchestra's highly publicized plans for bring-your-own-pot concert series go up in smoke as city of Denver threatens 'criminal penalties'
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Man is sentenced to 98 years in prison, gets out after eight years due to clerical error, spends a few years turning his life around and then promptly gets sent back to jail for 90 more years
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Clear your desks, everybody: The Fark Weird News Quiz is back, kicking names and taking ass
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass peregrine falcon hatches inside nest at energy company
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Here's a look at why people have stopped talking on telephones
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri May 09, 2014
(Big Frog 104)
 
 
 
An Australian wedding photo shoot turned into a rescue and ended with groomsmen photographed in wet underwear
source: bigfrog104.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Of course townspeople would have a problem when a cop shoots a 93-year-old woman with no justification, who everyone loved. Now they want the cop fired. The question is why haven't they fired him yet? Even the mayor wants him gone
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Postal Service Reports $1.9 Billion Quarterly loss. Ben Gibbard distraught
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
Good senior prank: Plugging the bathroom sinks at school , filling them up, and putting live goldfish in them. Bad senior prank: Chopping down 25 trees growing on your campus
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPBF West Palm Beach)
 
 
 
PRO TIP: If you takie a selfie while dealing drugs right next to a deputy's cruiser, do not under any circumstances post it to Facebook
source: on.wpbf.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Foodbeast)
 
 
 
So a glazed doughnut stuffed with cookie dough ice cream walked into a bar. A chocolate bar
source: foodbeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Massachusetts court rules 'under God' does not make the Pledge of Allegiance religious. Praise Jesus
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Brew, I didnt know you were such a Drewer
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
I'm going with "Rich People"
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Rural high school students arrested for being rural high school students post-Columbine
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Walmart customer stabs employee with scissors because she disliked her 'vibe'
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop: light a candle in the darkness
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Trends)
 
 
 
Web host throttles FCC's internet access to dial-up speeds to remind them what net neutrality can do. But is happy to restore their access for 1,000 bars of gold-pressed latinum. Quark, you're doing it wrong
source: digitaltrends.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
If you had "3 days after the SCOTUS ruling" for a man to request a Satanic prayer to open a city council meeting in Fark's favorite state step up and collect your prize
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Anyone looking for a missing coffin full of nunchucks, a crossbow and 44 other weapons can find it at the Volusia County Sheriff's Office
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Mysterious hot metal object hits man's house from above. Police deny any knowledge of UFOs, streetlights
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Dancing frogs are now apparently a thing since scientists just discovered them
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
That's what I love about these sorority girls who get in trouble for making members drink alcohol, lie on the floor, and sizzle like bacon, man. I get older, they stay the same age
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Let's publish a how-to article on stopping a wedding. What could possibly go wrong?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABA Journal)
 
 
 
Got your expensive new law degree? It's now good enough for a job at Walmart
source: abajournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phoenix New Times)
 
 
 
Mexican sushi? Say it ain't so, jose
source: blogs.phoenixnewtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
I am not restricting access to the public beach. Anyone can go there, just not by land
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this shady man
source: a.abcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Extreme poverty has been cut in half since 1990 and is on track to be all but eliminated by 2030
source: go.worldbank.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Fort Lauderdale Airport needs a new name, says mayor. How about the United Florida International Airport?
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
It seems being hired as a worker on the stadium for Brazil's World Cup gig is like being the drummer in Spinal Tap
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL (UK))
 
 
 
Heavy truck drivers take bicycling lessons to make them more aware of cyclists, learn their weaknesses so they can more easily run them off the road
source: cars.aol.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
If a gun shop leaves a homeless man unattended and finds a rifle missing with $200 left on the counter, tells the police it was stolen but tells the bank it was a sale, who gets sued when the homeless man shoots a random stranger? Show your work
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Heather Johnson had a car / And it was painted red / Heather ran over her fiance twice / While demanding his arrest instead
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
That nude selfie you sent on Snapchat? You may be seeing it again. And not just at your trial
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Visiting the dentist to become the number one tourist attraction in Taiwan
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Med student, 28, who had planned to auction off her virginity with the highest offer, now just wants to put it behind her
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(8 News Now)
 
 
 
Remember that guy who was photographed on the overpass taking aim on the BLM during the Bundy Ranch standoff? Yeah, he's screwed
source: 8newsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
What's going on with the situation in Ukraine? They're getting medieval now
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Museum that pays homage to almost every Fark thread ever opens in Queens
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Half a llama. Twice a llama. Not a llama. Farmer llama. BEAR
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
The new Brimstone missile is so accurate it can be configured in a warhead-free mode to bring freedom to the driver of a vehicle and leave the passengers untouched
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Man's decapitated body found, wife missing. Police seek both heads of the household
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Great: Bacon and whiskey. Greatest: Whiskey infused bacon. GREATEST THING OF ALL TIME: Bacon made from pigs fed the grain used to make whiskey
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Dear Prudence: Can we do a Mother's Day edition where we talk about how to reconcile friendships, shaft one daughter in a will in favor of another, and a spendthrift mother who's about to die and siblings that won't pay for the funeral?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(When On Earth)
 
 
 
Meanwhile in Northern Italy, there's a giant pink knitted bunny sprawled across the top of a hill. "By the expression on its face and entrails spilled out at its side, it seems like it fell right out of the sky"
source: whenonearth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Why Americans will never walk or bike to work, explained in a series of handy graphs. Basically the east coast has no use for bikes, the south has no use for walking, and 8 out of 10 people overall drive to work alone and always will
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
What happens when the Yellowstone supervolcano erupts? Plans call for the hundreds of surviving Americans to be sent to Brazil, Australia and Argentina (w/ maps showing whether you're more likely to be deported or just dead by then)
source: warnewsupdates.blogspot.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Register Star)
 
 
 
VA botches colonoscopy, gives veteran hepatitis C, then farks up his paperwork, then denies his benefits. Medicaid: Hey, can we get in on jerking this guy around? VA: Sure, be our guest
source: registerstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Russia: Just you wait, right after we do this Ukraine gig we're going to invade the moon
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Would you like a sex toy with those burgers and fries?
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFSB Connecticut)
 
 
 
Cop shoots unarmed black teen... Wait, scratch that. Cop buys bed, furniture, TV and a Wii for teenager who only had an inflatable mattress to sleep on, after responding to a routine call
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Why Fark in Saudi Arabia wouldn't be such a good idea: Drew would be constantly caned, and half of Farkers would be labeled as terrorists
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
As you sit at your cubicle perusing Fark under a soul-bleaching fluorescent light, your grandmother might be surfing, practicing archery, or cheerleading
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time (Images))
 
 
 
Photoshop these goals
source: timedotcom.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Startup company creates a pay-as-you go monthly washing machine subscription service. We'll see how the media spins this one in the next news cycle
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Orlando)
 
 
 
18-year-old cancer patient wants to go to prom, but worries how he'll look in photos with his protective mask on. Thanks to all his friends, the photos turned out freaking awesome, and a little bit dusty
source: myfoxorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Lawyer who was tied up and robbed by armed robbers vows to ask the judge for leniency on the condition that they turn themselves in
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Miami)
 
 
 
Cops fire "at least" 377 rounds. 2 unarmed men killed. 2 cops shot by fellow cops. Several businesses and nearby homes also hit. They "protected and served" the Hell outta that town tonight
source: miami.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFAA Fort Worth)
 
 
 
Blasphemy, or pure genius? You decide: McDonald's to dabble in seasoned fries
source: wfaa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Chinese city unveils mega spray gun that will squirt smog and pollution out of the sky
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
If you're thinking about giving your buddy a tap to the balls while he's busy playing DDR, you should know that your insurance isn't going to cover it when he has to undergo emergency surgery
source: articles.mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
In an interesting twist, a heterosexual man files human rights complaint to get the same benefits afforded to homosexuals
source: news.nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Police say a man who drove into a canal was distracted due to the presence of his half-naked wife gyrating on his lap while he was driving
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ohio.com)
 
 
 
Burger King is finally listening to the demands of night owls, 3rd shift workers and those fighting a hangover
source: ohio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Man gets tired of potholes on city street, fills them in with gravel, quickly threatened by city to undo his work or face fines
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Godzilla is no match for the Incredible Hulk, Chuck Norris and George W. Bush
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
High ranking defector from Best Korea says Kim Jong Un is just a puppet. I think I've seen this movie
source: amanpour.blogs.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Startup company pulls fake sign-language interpreter from Nelson Mandela's funeral out of a psychiatric hospital to film promotional spot. Word has it he waved his rights
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
TripAdvisor ranks the top 10 BBQ states, Georgia #1, North Carolina #2, Texas #3. Story to the left, meat and sauce arguments, suggested BBQ joints to the right
source: multivu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Daily Press)
 
 
 
Japan's First Lady marches in Tokyo's pride parade. Your move, Michelle
source: japandailypress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
That awkward moment when a woman hugs you, police assume she's a prostitute, she gets arrested and then you watch a court order her deportation
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jacksonville.com)
 
 
 
Don't like your neighbors? Why not pretend to be the homeowner and hire a company to bulldoze their trailer?
source: members.jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu May 08, 2014
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Italian prisoners will get their sentences reduced by three days for every book they read while in jail
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Starbucks barista has to be special and give his 'cup art' that takes him 40 hours to make, to lucky customers. So che'che'
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Two influential metal musicians come out of the closet. "That stuff you're banging your head to? That is some gay, gay metal, man"
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Net neutrality activists have set up camp in Washington to demonstrate in front of the FCC. Wonder what the WiFi is like there?
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Brave patriots harass and threaten a sinister government employee on a highway for the dastardly deed of driving a government vehicle while on the job
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Is that a potential cure for Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this photo bombed selfie
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Fisherman accidentally catches rare giant cockroaches along with rare nightmare fuel shark
source: businessinsider.in   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
The "Bolder Boulder" (Colorado) 10K series, one of the most popular races in America, chooses "Sea Level Is For Sissies" slogan for race t-shirt; naturally, someone has a problem with the word "sissies"
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Man admits to murdering wife and lover. Fark: On a TV dating show
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Adweek)
 
 
 
Brazilian teens learn English by chatting with lonely elderly Americans. What could possibly go wrong?
source: adweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Mom reports child missing. Search party of 50 called. Child was at school
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Even if you're right, you're going to have a hard time convincing the judge presiding over your custody battle that bringing home the occasional prostitute doesn't really harm your kids
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Someone took the whole "in the can" thing too literally. And fit
source: whizba.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Good News: New York metropolitan region starts its first new big bridge project in 83 years with a new Goethals Bridge. Bad news: It's still going to New Jersey
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
Ah, the good ol' use a dummy so I can get into the carpool lane trick
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby red panda makes debut at SF zoo. Slideshow includes ugly pic of his ugly tongue sticking out of his ugly mouth
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
President says schoolgirl kidnapping will be the end of Nigerian terrorism. Good luck with that
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Man arrested for stabbing closet door. The fact that a man was behind it is also relevant
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
Here's a collection of pictures of spiders eating bats. Sleep tight
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Okay this is getting pretty sad: Apparently the US has greater income inequality than India these days. INDIA
source: blogs.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Dodo)
 
 
 
Dog protects lost three-year-old for six hours in a thunderstorm. Give that dog two steaks. A day. For the rest of his life
source: thedodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Food Nut)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Ok, we can debate all day about which city does it best, but what's your secret to homemade pizza success?
source: butteryum.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
If you've just down a 12-pack of beer, don't get on your lawn mower to ride down to the store to pick up more beer
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
I would go to lunch, but I'm going to microwave some fish and kimchi in the break room instead
source: blog.sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Montgomery News)
 
 
 
Result of female realtor's plans to "fix" her marriage sound like the combination of an HGTV show, Lifetime movie, and the People's Court
source: montgomerynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Yorker)
 
 
 
Contaminated location in NYC to be added to superfund list. Surprisingly, this has little to do with hipsters
source: newyorker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
France shells out $4.2 million to protect its hamsters, apparently unaware that you can buy them for, like, $7
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
School lunches from around the world, subby wants to move to France. Slideshow
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reviewed.com)
 
 
 
Fly larvae paté? Ugh, no way -- paté is gross
source: refrigerators.reviewed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Eugene Register-Guard)
 
 
 
"I gotta tell you, I'm getting a lot of protein eating these spiders" says homeless volunteer cleaning up a city park
source: registerguard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cat getting high
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
More and more Americans believe it is possible to be possessed by spirits, and they're not just talking about what happens when you get shiatfaced on Maker's Mark
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Bernardino Sun)
 
 
 
School district now admits that giving its 8th graders a Holocaust denial writing assignment was probably a bad idea
source: sbsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Kali Ma...Kali Ma...KALI MA SHAKTI DE
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
"I then noticed some meat sitting in his front seat"
source: blogs.tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
90-year-old man figures he has nothing to lose by working as a Mexican drug mule, forgets about the dying-in-prison thing
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
The Taliban have finally done it with their destructive behavior, they've now drawn the wrath of aliens
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WISN Milwaukee)
 
 
 
Bad News: Roommate hid a camera in your bedroom. Good news: After reviewing hours of footage, police declare you look damned good
source: wisn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
77-year-old Florida man tasered after trying to escape alleged bank robbery with walker
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Why you should never break up with someone in public: there's always going to be a jerk at the next table live-tweeting it all. "His eyes are watering. He is looking at her salad. Mixed greens, boring, no more talking JUST LOOKING INTO THE SALAD"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
.....In other news, every Farker ever has applied for a job with the EPA
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Bear attacks and kills worker at Canadian oil sands plant in what officials are calling a grizzly death
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Police: Glass bong is shattered; angry teen reacts by smearing mom's car with yogurt
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
If you think Obamacare is bad, in the UK the hospitals are run by someone who believes water has memory and can cure disease
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Intellectual Ventures: the countries biggest patent trolling firm with almost $6 billion in assets, got cocky enough to try to shake down Wall Street. Big mistake
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
In most places, you put your fuzzy hats away once the weather warms up. In Alaska, you put your fuzzy hats away when the Eagles start looking for nest material
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CrushPlate)
 
 
 
"He described that he stuck two straws up his nose and was attempting to break his own nose using a door that he would open rapidly and impact his face," Without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, Idaho man
source: crushplate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLSAM)
 
 
 
How do you top being charged with outrageous bribes to public officials? By posting bail in rubies and diamonds or course
source: wlsam.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
So what do you do after being arrested for twerking at city hall while high on meth? Take to Facebook to defend yourself by saying you were actually high on Ecstasy. That was merely cut with meth
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The Navy really doesn't like if if you hack into their databases while serving aboard one of their aircraft carriers
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fresno Bee)
 
 
 
In the graphic designer's defense, Auschwitz and Fresno can be easily confused
source: fresnobee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Elderly couple marry after a whirlwind 55-year engagement
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Q13 Fox)
 
 
 
Man has fight with his smoking hot girlfriend
source: q13fox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metronews.ca)
 
 
 
Darth Vader underestimates the power of the Force
source: metronews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Death and Taxes Magazine)
 
 
 
Dear Abby, can my son get high from twerking? Sincerely, mom out of tune with today and trapped in a bubble
source: deathandtaxesmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
Aleppo: When the hotel fell
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
If you had "five days" as how long Sunrail would last without an accident, step forward and claim your prize
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Cannibal cop becomes prison cook. In a completely unrelated story, this particular prison is no longer suffering from overcrowding problems
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
No matter what you may have read on the Internet, there is no such thing as a "people's arrest warrant", and you certainly shouldn't try serving one to the chief of police, no matter how unpopular he may be
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Justice is served as prosecutors dropped cocaine trafficking charges against a man rather than reveal the identity of a "sexy female informant" crucial to the case
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
How not to pick up strippers
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Yet even more ways to get fired by using Facebook
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Diplomat)
 
 
 
Australians named 'happiest people on the planet', presumably because the ones able to fill in surveys have gone another day without being killed by everything that walks, flies, swims or crawls in their godforsaken country
source: thediplomat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWMT Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
West Virginia woman finds a kidney donor on Craigslist. Come on, would you really want a kidney that's been inside someone drinking West Virginia tap water?
source: wwmt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ohio.com)
 
 
 
Responsible, law-abiding gun owner stands his ground against a groundhog, but at 165 feet wasn't able to tell it was actually his 22-year-old employee
source: ohio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Aero-News Newwork)
 
 
 
"News gathering is not a 'business purpose.' It is a First Amendment right"
source: aero-news.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
The U.S. government has a problem with states handing out driver licenses to illegal immigrants. Hey Feds, you might want to look into the crime of Sanctuary Cities while you're at it
source: blogs.sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Dear Prudence: We're swingers, and our young neighbors might be amenable to that lifestyle and we're thinking about asking them to join us. Great idea or greatest idea?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop Gummyzilla terrorizing the town
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Mom tells cops to lock up her 42-year-old son after he went on 'drunken rampage' and destroyed her house with a baseball bat. This is why Florida is in desperate need of basements
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
"I've been abducted by aliens my whole life"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If you were at a job interview with the company's CEO, could you answer this trick math question?
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Man kills wife and parrot because he said they "talked too much"
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Police shove "sharp oblong object" down teens throat because they're convinced he swallowed drugs, end up killing him. Fark: "No bag was found"
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click2Houston)
 
 
 
Nice yard you got there. It'd be a shame if some bald guy took a dump in it
source: click2houston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Attention, ladies: Here are the top ten cities you can meet single men. There is one little, caveat, however
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
West Coast stars deteriorating into goo. No, this is not another list of celebrities aging badly
source: bc.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
More cops have died due to illnesses contracted from 9/11's aftermath than cops who died in the attack
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(OC Weekly)
 
 
 
Because you know the first thing you'd buy after robbing a deaf and blind 98-year-old widow suffering from dementia is a sex swing
source: blogs.ocweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 470: "How We See Ourselves". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed May 07, 2014
(Campus Reform)
 
 
 
Students post ad for hitman to injure them severely enough so that they won't die, but wouldn't have to take finals either
source: campusreform.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
The world's tallest bride: 6ft 8in Brazilian beauty to marry her 5ft 4in boyfriend
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Subby can't tell for sure if the Philadelphia Zoo has thought its new enclosed passageways for lions and tigers all the way through
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Real estate mogul puts graphic statue of a nude pregnant woman and her fetus, that shows the insides of it and everything, on his property. You bet people have a problem with this
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
A great redwood like that, you don't use it all at once
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Spokane police ban sitting on sidewalks, walking on sidesits
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
And the latest excuse for your fat ass is *throws dart* airplane noise
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Well if getting hit by a car in an accident doesn't take care of a pedestrian, a 60-foot fall will
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
It's 'perfectly normal' to see Jesus in your toast, according to new research from the Elvis Presley Institute of Extra-Terrestrial and Large-Footed Mammalian Studies
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Putin: Dear Bloggers, you're going to love writing about scenic Siberia. In your own blood
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Yogurt is now the official New York State snack. Apparently most residents can always use a little extra culture
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this ship under construction
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
NSA to Canada: "Here, use these phones. They are TOTALLY secure"
source: motherboard.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Old and busted: wealthy widow leaves her estate to her cat. New hotness: wealthy widow leaves estate to her philodendron. I guess that makes her a philodendron philanthropist
source: samachar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Real Estate agent sends letter to an elderly couple telling them to get off their own lawn
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Montana homeowner exercises his rights under the Deadly Force in Defense of a Half-Rack of Beer Act
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
It takes a special kind of Court employee to steal pension, life insurance and retirement benefits from another employee minutes after she dies
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Bay Area)
 
 
 
NTSB begins investigating air show crash involving a 77 year old pilot. Initial reports say the plane went several minutes with the left blinker light on
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
1,600 papier-mâché pandas are set to invade Hong Kong, with a photo that will haunt your dreams for years to come
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Political Wire)
 
 
 
"Now, don't get me wrong. It's not as amazing as smoking crack cocaine"
source: politicalwire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
Five cute waddling goslings get a police escort on the busy interstate - and you get home two hours late
source: homewood-flossmoor.patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
Boko Haram doesn't really mean "Western education is a sin" despite what you may have learned from Western media
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Turning to the morning traffic report, we have cow
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shorpy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this clock watcher and his collection of contraptions
source: shorpy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science News)
 
 
 
Scary: Dinosaurs. Scarier: Dinosaurs that can heal themselves
source: sci-news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week UK)
 
 
 
Australian government catches 172 sharks after spate of attacks. Sharks file genocide complaint at the International Criminal Court
source: theweek.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Poland, who may not remember 1938 all that well, decides to tweak Russia by awarding the Inaugural "Solidarity Prize" for achievements in spreading human rights and democracy to a Crimean Tatar leader who opposed Russian annexation
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Bitcoin cologne, for those who want to smell like loneliness
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BGR)
 
 
 
Yup... The FCC's new net neutrality proposal is already ruining the Internet
source: bgr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
3/4 of high school seniors don't know how to math. For example, 1,527.34¾% don't understand percentages
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
Illinois and Wisconsin have more bars than grocery stores. Most Americans tweet more about beer than church. All of this from the five maps of American drunkeness
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
Hallmark now making Mother's Day cards for kids with two moms who are too cheap to buy two cards
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
Nigeria would welcome the US military as liberators, honest
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
We Killed A Zoo
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
"When the elves came to me and said, 'Are you ready to be a kind of spokesperson for us,' and I said, 'Yeah, sure,'" Jónsdóttir starts, before hushing into a whisper, "They didn't mention police"
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Keep using that shampoo and you soon won't have hair to wash
source: blog.sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metronews.ca)
 
 
 
City of Calgary rubbing out suspect massage parlours
source: metronews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Drive (Australia))
 
 
 
Journalists asked not to report $800,000 Lamborghini catching fire. Sure they won't
source: drive.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
When taunting a Great White Shark, it's probably best not to do it from an inflatable boat
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Goat born with eight legs has both male and female sex organs. Jeez, kids these days
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
I can tell no lie, there once was a dinosaur named Pinocchio who was just as fearsome as T.rex
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Company accused of starting deadly Boston fire has a great alibi: It doesn't exist
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Two-week-long summer in Britain could be spoiled this year by manhole-cover sized jellyfish washing up on popular beaches. With pic of what a manhole-cover sized jellyfish looks like, and yeah, that would keep anyone at home
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Grand Army of the Bronx retreats to a bar to drink beer after their attempts to annex a Manhattan neighborhood fails. In international news, President Obama announces Operation Vodka
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Justice Panel wants to get rid of lethal cocktail. I will miss the Irish Carbomb
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Fox News producer: "Get me some stock footage of crying Asians for the ferry piece." Intern: "Koreans, right?" Producer; "Doesn't matter; they all look alike"
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Has Fark turned you into a better person or you are more cynical and sarcastic?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Linguists say that blah blah blah blah
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
New Hampshire Supreme Court to decide whether man can be pulled over every time he drives his car
source: t.seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Check out these kids in the hospital when they figure out who is washing the windows
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pottstown Mercury)
 
 
 
High school dropout who became a stripper and got busted for DUI asks to represent herself at trial, doesn't want to break her current streak of consecutive bad decisions
source: pottsmerc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KVUE Austin)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready headline: "Man wearing mini skirt sets bank on fire"
source: kvue.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Greensboro News-Record)
 
 
 
"We have not been able to confirm that the dog was not driving"
source: news-record.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Man says finding brother's body after he was crushed by bulldozer left a big impression
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
If you really want to reduce suicides, don't ban alcohol. Ban unemployment
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
These little microbeads in my exfoliating face cream are multi-taskers: they keep my skin looking good, and they also are killing the planet
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Police might have never found the guy with the hash oil operation if he hadn't called 911 to report the pit bull savaging his penis
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Mmmm, pried chicken
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when you go in to rob a gas station, but then you have to end up working a shift?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Fox News' parent company to buy romance novel publisher Harlequin Books. Photoshop some Fox News-inspired romance novel covers. Link goes to GIS of Harlequin covers
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(When On Earth)
 
 
 
If you think the toilets in Arkansas are weird, you should see what they look like in Tibet
source: whenonearth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
What to do when Russian troops invade your town. Curiously, at no point does the article recommend taking to the forests with your plucky but outgunned group of Wolverines. Author must not have seen that documentary
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Smoking hot 21-year-old construction worker wins beauty pagaent, is crowned Miss Birmingham, plans to keep her day job: "I really love construction and I want more girls to get into it" (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
A golden retriever protected the body of its elderly owner from coyotes after the 81-year-old died while skiing in Colorado. Give that dog a steak
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Lusty licentiousness and prurience, not prudence leads to happy marriages, according to randy rabbi. "Lust is key to all marriages in bible"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orange County Register)
 
 
 
The OC... where high school seniors and juniors hold NFL style drafts for prom dates
source: ocregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
The perv on the bus goes fap fap fap, fap fap fap, fap fap fap
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Why did the US woman post a video of her abortion on YouTube? Apparently it was her choice
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Want to sneak onto White House grounds without getting shot by the Secret Service? Just blend in to a motorcade
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
China commands an army of trained monkeys. Presumably to counter Russia's bear cavalry
source: animals.io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
New bill would require high schools to teach students how to perform CPR and use defibrillators. Naturally, some people have a problem with this
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Blaze)
 
 
 
Father at school board meeting: "I'm not sure this book is appropriate for my daughter to read." School board: "That's interesting, because we're sure you're under arrest for having an opinion about it"
source: theblaze.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Worst knock-knock joke ever
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
More than four hundred residents of Stanton, Iowa formed a human chain in order to pass books from the old city library to the new city library
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jerusalem Post)
 
 
 
Possible explosion at possible Iranian nuclear facility
source: jpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue May 06, 2014
(USA Today)
 
 
 
NASA captures huge explosion on the surface of the sun, which can mean only one thing
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Not satisfied with graduating high school early, 16-year-old also graduates from college
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Our Windsor)
 
 
 
Senator hands out business card with phone number for sex chat line. He's got my vote
source: ourwindsor.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Your ISP is o n l y . l e t t i n g . y o u . . r. e. a. d . . t . h . i . s . . v . . e . . r . . y . . . . s . . . l . . . o . . . w . . . l . . . y
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Disney World 1971 monorail cab for sale on eBay, and the lucky winner can have the same experience as Brockway, Ogdenville, and North Haverbrook. And by gum, the monorail put them on the map
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
In the last five days, 120 people have overdosed in Texas on legal synthetic marijuana. Take that, Colorado
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
Humans, YOU can't handle the truth about aliens
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWSB ABC 7)
 
 
 
Florida detectives accidentally leave city hall unlocked over weekend so they can use the "nice" bathrooms
source: mysuncoast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPBF West Palm Beach)
 
 
 
Not News: Kentucky Derby horse hosed off to keep cool. Fark: By firefighters on Florida's Turnpike
source: wpbf.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
You really have to love it if you spend 50 years of your 60-year life collecting over 75,000 items of McDonald's memorabilia
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Kellogg's comes out with a new flavor for its Pop Tart brand: Latex
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
Nobody puts baby in a corner. The bedroom closet, on the other hand
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Former NJ police officer who had his wife shoot him in the foot so he could get a pension, shoots himself in the foot again after being denied his request for a disability pension
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Eight underrated "beer cities." Mmm... cities of beer
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
It's the age-old heartwarming story: Fat girl wears Hooters t-shirt in public; obnoxious drunken stranger tells fat girl "you sure don't look like any Hooters girl I've seen"; fat girl loses 130 lbs. and gets job as actual Hooters girl
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Foodbeast)
 
 
 
Reviews of The Placenta Cookbook: "I was highly disappointed to find that placenta delivery was not included. I had to deliver my own. Practically gave myself contractions from all that hard work"
source: foodbeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Ringling Brothers acrobats' fall blamed on... the weakest link. Goodbye
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bawdy bowler
source: l2.yimg.com   |   share: