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Sun April 27, 2014
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Nanny state alleges abuse against foster parent because they: A) hit them, B) starved them, or C) held their hands too tightly as they crossed the road
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Promise kept: The price of electricity is about to skyrocket, necessarily
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Father kicks hesitant 6-year-old son down half pipe in an effort to teach him how to drop in. At least he got the "drop" part down
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
"Hey Doc, my stylish shoes don't fit, will you cut off one of my toes?"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Louisiana's Angola Prison Rodeo celebrates fifty years of helping inmates avoid going stir crazy
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Carl Sagan Portal)
 
 
 
"Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey" episode 8 discussion thread and drinking game. 9PM Eastern on Fox
source: carlsagan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rome News-Tribune)
 
 
 
If you had three days after Georgia's "guns in bars" bill was signed for the first fatal shooting in a bar, come on up and collect your prize
source: northwestgeorgianews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop these pushing protesters
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newschannel 9)
 
 
 
Begun the Bear Wars have
source: newschannel9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
What could be more fun than an Osama bin Laden-themed bar? How about three of them?
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Knoxville police captured on film choking passive student that was being handcuffed. Bonus, as student passed out officer biatch slapped him a few times, because fark you, that's why
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Study finds that, during sex, 43% of all men have an orgasm within two minutes. Chin up, dear Farker, I know that seems like an eternity, but there are exercises you can do
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Reporter hires hooker. Takes her out to dinner, goes dancing, and barely even makes out with her before parting ways. You're doing it wrong, John
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
Jogger. Headphones. Train.
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Splitting lanes on a motorcycle opens the door to all sorts of experiences
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Baby gorillas born at Bronx Zoo. With the cutest pictures you've seen since 2006
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Spice up this salt mine scene
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
South Carolina town rallies against bigoted mayor, demands their lesbian police chief back
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
School writes letter to upset parents explaining their students' Kindergarten play was cancelled so they can prepare students for college. Letter shows the administrators should consider retaking English 101
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Transnistria wants to be annexed by Russia. Subby's not sure that's even a real place
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
A look inside one of the most terrifying, vile places known to NPR: An NRA convention
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence, we're from the deep south and we complained because our child's teacher forced prayer on the classroom, and we got it to stop. Now, everyone in town hates us. What should we do?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Which states fail the most at feeding children? Congratulations New Mexico, for knocking out long-time champion Mississippi for the top spot
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
So it's come to this, Chicago: The Sun-Times has developed an interactive map known as the "Weekend Shooting Tracker" so people can see how many people were shot, when they were shot, and where they were shot
source: voices.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Angry parents call cops to arrest teenager for selling drugs at a book giveaway. Did I say selling drugs? I meant giving away books
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
50 year-old man decides to play a game of "Hey, Y'all, Watch This" with his friends, jumping off a 15 foot bridge into the water. And it would have worked, had a boat not picked that moment to travel by
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Virginia Christians prepare for 40-day hunger strike against same-sex marriage. Good luck with that, and can we have what's in your fridge now?
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Not news: taking a nice ocean swim. News: followed by sharks. Fark: Rescued by dolphins
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Study claims women are more likely to cheat if their man has a large penis. FARKers immediately understand why they've all been so unlucky in love
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Woman denied entry to the US because her name sounds like "Al Qaeda." I know I feel safer
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
CDC says vaccines prevent over 700,000 child deaths in the US. Anti-Vaxxers hope to get those numbers down to less than half that
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Photoshop this person and pickup
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Headline News TV)
 
 
 
School graduation bans selfies. Finally, a use of zero tolerance we can all get behind
source: hlntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
So, a topless woman walks into the mayor's office
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Baby safe after crawling across busy Utah street. Though to be fair, a "busy" street in Utah means three whole cars per hour have passed through
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
President Obama is DONE with selfies. DONE
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Bad: Man mowing grass has hand cut off. Fark: By propeller of plane that crashed into him
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
On-duty cops in a squad car caught playing cards and smoking cigars by a reporter who will soon be found mysteriously dead in a ditch with 10 baggies of cocaine stuffed down his throat and a dozen kiddie porn pictures in his pockets
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck goosed
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
"I feel happy. I feel HAPPY--" **BOOM**
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KXLH Helena)
 
 
 
South of East charged for driving North instead of West
source: kxlh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Two teenage girls injured in motorboating incident. Is it still Spring Break?
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming to you from Alaska's capital city, it's another round of Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Two hours of music hosted live by a farker
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
. . . - - - . . .
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat April 26, 2014
(io9)
 
 
 
Dinosaurs were a lot bigger than animals are today. Why is that?
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
How do you want your corpse posed at your funeral? Submitter will need a rubber hose, some ducks and a donkey wearing a batman suit
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Modesto Bee)
 
 
 
Police find abandoned body in abandoned body shop. Which really is the first place they should have looked
source: modbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
I don't know what you are talking about but here's a guy who likes lizards in his penis
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time (Images))
 
 
 
Photoshop these show-offs
source: timedotcom.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Ugly assed slideshow of OTTER PUPS PLAYING
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Bay Area)
 
 
 
Couple decide to remodel their old Victorian house to resemble the home in the Pixar movie "Up". Surprisingly someone has a problem with this
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Better Government Association)
 
 
 
Get convicted of taking bribes from the mob in exchange for protecting illegal gaming interests? While a police chief? Not to worry, you can keep your pension. And your spot on the pension board that oversees pension finances
source: bettergov.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Local)
 
 
 
Latest viral video is Valley Forge bride going all George Washington on wedding crashers: "They were sitting at a table where it was just my cousins"
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Surveillance drones we can cheer for: Kenya reduces poaching by 96%
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Caller)
 
 
 
Are you white? Do you use the word "fiesta" when throwing a Cinco de Mayo charity fundraiser? Then you are as racist as a deadbeat cattle rancher in Nevada who hangs out with the owner of the Clippers
source: dailycaller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Al Gore invented the Internet and Dear Leader invented hamburgers
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Free Beacon)
 
 
 
Handing out copies of the U.S. Constitution to fellow students at the University of Hawaii? The '60s are over man, you better get your ass over to the Free Speech zone
source: freebeacon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
He was an intelligent, polite, well educated young man - a regular man about town. That was until he took hallucinogenic drugs in a tribal ritual
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
"They were exactly where law enforcement thought they were going to be," she said. "They had shed their clothes and they were only in their boxers"
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this speed racer
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
In this corner, the ukulele. In the other corner, the steel guitar. Which one will become the state instrument of Hawaii? DING DING
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
400 years later, Spain finally gets around to looking for Cervantes body
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
All navigation crew of South Korean ferry are under arrest
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
♫ The best part of waking up is no Type II diabetes in your cup ♫
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The People Have Spoken: The State of Idaho will not allow a Gay Veteran to be buried with wife in the State's Veterans cemetery
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Woman uses her pickup to ram into a bank robber's vehicle to help catch him. The truck is pretty much totaled but "it seemed right at the time. I hope a criminal thinks twice about robbing a business in the Wellsville area"
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Here's how you can tell when people are lying and aren't lying. Or is this just one big lie to make you look foolish? Guess you'll never know
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Judge criticized for handing out Bibles to defendants to try and get them to turn over a new leaf, eroding the entire judicial process and potentially prejudicing himself to prosecutors
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Stubborn ospreys who kept rebuilding nest in front of traffic camera finally receive spiffy new government housing
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
How did a 700-page book on economics surge to No. 1 on Amazon? Here comes the math
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Do you have $140,000 and 24 vacation days saved up?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Today is World Penguin Day. Activities include celebrations, displays, music by Seal
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Caption this porcine rescue
source: l1.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(When On Earth)
 
 
 
When you get bored of swimming with sharks try cage diving with giant salt water crocodiles
source: whenonearth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Today is National Save the Frogs Day. Let's all do something before they croak
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
What do you do if your wife can't officially register to run the Boston Marathon? If you're the founder of Foursquare, you know "rules" don't apply to rich people, so you just steal someone else's number
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
10 camping tips from Bear Grylls. Curiously absent: Any mention of submerging yourself in cold water, glissading for no reason at all, or Motel 6. Bonus: Not a slideshow. Fark: Because the slideshow is broken
source: webseobuypanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Relax)
 
 
 
It's one thing to air your grievances at a hotel staff after being notified that the rooms you thought you had booked aren't available. It's another thing to air your grievances at a hotel staff for seven straight hours
source: relax.com.sg   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this scaremonger
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
"Trees are wonderful. They're naturally beautiful; require little, if any attention. And they enable life for all that is beautiful on Earth. In other words, the antithesis of the Kardashians." said the best man in late night (CF) in relation to this
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Livestream)
 
 
 
We are seeing rapid development of the story with the first video live from the scene in New York at the first North American Cat Cafe, where adoptable cats interact with New Yorkers. All new just in time for Caturday. Livestream in progress
source: new.livestream.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Massive gas explosion rocks North Bend. Subby thought that massive gas explosions usually happened a bit further south
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Parents of dead teens sue driver who hit them for $1.35 million for emotional distress. Wait, that's way too reasonable to be on Fark. Must be the other way around
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ever wonder why Bloody Marys taste so damn good when you're flying? Well here's the Daily Fail science, drink it to the last drop
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
If you took home $250,000 a year it would take 11,200 years to make enough to lose what Jeff Bezos lost today
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
OMf'nG, a Russain spy ship has been in international waters in the Gulf of Mexico and off the East Coast of America for over a MONTH looking at our sub bases.. CALL OUT THE FLEET
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(11 Alive)
 
 
 
The City of Buford, Georgia loves veterans. They love them so much that they're about to declare eminent domain on a 33 acre American Legion Post that has been there for decades
source: 11alive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Most letter carriers don't give a crap if your mailbox is full and will still try to shove even more in there day after day. This guy however, is not one of those letter carriers
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Overturned tractor-trailer blocks Atlanta interstate traffic for hours, sends 70,000 Little Debbies to their deaths
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Northwest Indiana Times)
 
 
 
Scientists baffled as to why mysterious holes keep opening up in one of the dunes at Indiana Dunes National Lakeshore, including one that swallowed a kid. No word on when they'll call in Kevin Bacon
source: nwitimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 25, 2014
(Fox News)
 
 
 
It ain't a real WV wedding until the bride murders a family member in a bar parking lot
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
U.S. military expert unveils strategy for deploying Godzilla in war. Wait, what?
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ever since her dalliance with notoriety, Tan Mom has stayed out of the limelight and devotes her life working at a charity. Just kidding. She had to be restrained after getting drunk at a press conference before a celebrity boxing match with Milf mom
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Coffee start-up plans to take on Starbucks by offering unlimited coffee to customers for $45 a month. Wasn't that the plot of a Seinfeld episode?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Georgia university locked down for an hour and a half because of A) a suspicious package B) a bomb threat C) a man with a cellphone in his front pocket
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this evil erruption
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
She's obviously a bee-cup
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
How long can you avoid drowning, getting carpal tunnel syndrome?
source: sortieenmer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Grilled. Bacon-wrapped. Onion Rings
source: grilling24x7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Attention parents: Please make sure your children know the difference between a sandbox and an intricate sand mandala that took Buddhist monks days to create
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Ugly ass zonkey born in Mexican zoo. No, a real one. Not one of those Tijuana zonkeys
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Union Leader)
 
 
 
Woman accused of making meth in her apartment looks about like you'd expect her to look
source: unionleader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
You mean it's illegal to keep gators in your backyard?
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TimeOut)
 
 
 
I like these dishes, you probably never heard of them
source: timeout.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
An adorable salamander who looks like a real-life Pokémon that can regenerate missing limbs is our absurd creature of the week
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Sorry, officer. I had the pot in my panties because the cocaine in my suitcase took up all the space
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
You know when you are standing of the roof of your mansion doing a photo shoot with a naked porn star, throwing her off the roof and into your pool always SEEMS like a great idea; but trust me, it's a harder shot than it looks
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
North Dakota, come for the rolling hills, national parks and open space, stay for radioactive oil waste from all the drilling
source: america.aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pink cow
source: huh.spb.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
If you're a US citizen seeking asylum abroad, North Korea probably is NOT the best choice
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Factor)
 
 
 
Soylent isn't people, nor is it green
source: factor-tech.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's Friday, y'all. Time for your weekly pop quiz
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Problem: Returning soldier finds two squatters in his home, police refuse to throw them out. Solution: A motorcycle gang of military veterans roll by and "peacefully make the squatters uncomfortable"
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Bike thief steals $4,000 electric bike, then calls owner to ask how to recharge it
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
I know it's the day of prom and you already have a boyfriend, but will you go to prom with me? ☐ Yes ☐ No (Warning: Checking 'no' results in choking, push down stairs, and eventual stabbing to death)
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
SC candidate for LT. governor proposes ending public education in the state because "we don't see anything in the Bible about state education." Am I the only one who REALLY doesn't want to see his ideas for reforming the judicial system?
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
"I know I have a dead body in my car dripping blood onto the road, but it's okay. That's my job"
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Register-Herald)
 
 
 
Man shoots himself to avoid jail time, gets more jail time
source: register-herald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
"I have a dream. A dream where a white man is able to secure federal land without paying any money for it and fighting the government. Where a white man can insult all black men with impunity"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Harris County, TX was being overrun with more than 10,000 extremely destructive feral hogs and stumped as to how to fix the problem. Then somebody remembered that hogs are made out of ham and bacon, and there are hungry people in Houston
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Who foots the bill when your neighbor's liquefied remains seep into your wall? Apparently not your insurance company
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Teen who hid in the wheel-well of an airliner to Hawaii was unhappy in school, trying to get home to Somalia, and failing geography
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
 
 
The private prison-builder who paid two PA juvenile court judges more than $2.1 million in bribes to sentence more than 4,000 kids to lengthy prison sentences is about to be sentenced himself, faces up to 14 whole months in jail for his crime
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Republic)
 
 
 
Yes, there's a mathematical formula for how many days you have to smoke e-cigarettes before you save money over tobacco. No, it won't tell you how much money it takes to compensate for how lame you'll look
source: newrepublic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Political Wire)
 
 
 
Do news reporters or politicians lie more often?
source: politicalwire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Netflix: Yeah, so what if Amazon's got HBO's whole catalog of shows? We'll show them by, um, well...Oh, I know, let's start our own cable channel
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gay Star News)
 
 
 
Ugandan preacher who demanded anti-gay law shows gay porn to congregation to show how evil it is. And now faces charges under that law. The Aristocrats
source: gaystarnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
When will people learn that most of the illegal acts that are advertised on Craigslist they are almost always undercover police stings that get people arrested. Even if you're just a horse enthusiast
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 4 Charleston)
 
 
 
Dumb: Woman asked to leave a gym. Dumber: Because her belly was hanging out. Fark: She is 18 weeks pregnant (with pics of her 'belly' hanging out)
source: abcnews4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(When On Earth)
 
 
 
English town creates a scented guidebook with scratch-and-sniff aromas that can only be found within city limits. Nobody tell New York about this
source: whenonearth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Pothole decides it must be fed vehicles... ah spring in Saskatoon
source: saskatoon.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Military wives bullying each other on Facebook leads to discovery of new insults, you dependa-potamus
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(14 News Evansville)
 
 
 
A 55-year-old man has been arrested for stabbing a 24-year-old at a Golden Corral restaurant. They must have been fighting over the last roll at the buffet. But if they had just waited 5 more minutes there would have been more rolls
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Have you ever thought to yourself 'if only i could scramble a egg while it was still in the shell, my life could be complete'? No, me either but it is now possible to do so thanks to Mr Krumpe and his bizarre kitchen appliance
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(CBC)
 
 
 
McDonald's Canada CEO brands being called out on practice of importing and exploiting foreigners to displace Canadian workers 'bullshiat', bemoans difficulty in finding slaves in current times
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(Yahoo)
 
 
 
New metaphor/meme/photoshop contest: "Oh man, I got wasted like a drunken elephant"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
The BBC asks the question everyone is thinking but didn't know who to ask: Why do all the generals following Kim Jong-un around have little notebooks out all the time?
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(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: Spring has sprung
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
The purpose of a face tattoo is to make yourself look intimidating, not like your buddies used a sharpie on you while you were passed out
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(When On Earth)
 
 
 
Remember the village of Sweethaven from the 1980 'Popeye' movie? Of course you don't, but it still exists to this day as a tourist attraction in a remote corner of Malta
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(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Florida sheriffs organize first state-wide coalition against legalized medical marijuana. Because then what would they do?
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
1888 shipwreck found near the Golden Gate Bridge. Which makes one more Carnival cruise ship that has now been accounted for
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courthouse News Service)
 
 
 
And, it begins
source: courthousenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KWQC Quad Cities)
 
 
 
First grader stabs classmate with hypodermic needle, and the school nurse told the girl's family "the needle looked clean so there's nothing to worry about"
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(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
How buzzwords are affecting our brains, synergizing our neural resources and ensuring we work smarter, not harder
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Would-be bank robber walks into Chase bank, selects a teller protected by bulletproof glass. Flustered, he leaves behind his ransom note, which contained his full name, making things easier for the FBI
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(My Fox Dallas)
 
 
 
Never bring a corn dog to a knife fight. Or a crazy woman
source: myfoxdfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
The latest trend amongst teens to get a buzz is Burt's Bees lip balm applied to the eyelids. Jenkem surrenders
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
You know what an Australia-Indonesia flight really needs right now? A good hijacking scare
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Researchers discover curvy girls have more sex - but not with researchers
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Two women get into Facebook argument, and one of them, a pregnant woman, decides to finish the argument in person. Little did she know the other woman was prepared to Stand Her Ground
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(Gawker)
 
 
 
Finally, there is a way to make breaking up by text message classy. Thanks Instagram
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Public Radio International)
 
 
 
Can a white comic ventriloquist with a black man puppet make jokes about race on a TV show? Let's find out
source: pri.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Brazilian drought means consumers will be spending more money on the most critical, essential building block to life: coffee
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Things are getting so safe in Chicago for fast food workers that you now have to talk to a guy behind a bulletproof glass booth to get a sandwich
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Say what you will about our cold winter, or too much rain, but at least we don't have billions of tons of sand falling out of the sky turning day into night
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 24, 2014
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Daughter really wants her unemployed dad to get a job... so she hands the First Lady his resume at the White House's annual Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day
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(NYPost)
 
 
 
Dear Jewish NYU student, you are hereby evicted from this dorm - sincerely, pro-Palestinian activists
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
You know what state needs faster speed limits?
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSMV Nashville)
 
 
 
Homeless man breaks into Lorraine Motel, site of MLK assassination, looking for a place to sleep. He later emerged and told officials, "I had a dream"
source: wsmv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
NYT: "Should A Chimp Be Able To Sue Its Owner?" Probably, but he would lose on a peel
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Esquire)
 
 
 
Jim Koch, co-founder of Sam Adams beer, reveals how to drink all night without getting drunk
source: esquire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Taco Bell is launching a new upscale concept known as U.S. Taco. No word if there will be the complimentary 3 seashells in each bathroom yet
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(Yandex.ru)
 
 
 
Photoshop that placid lake scene
source: img-fotki.yandex.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Alaskan officials report their ferries are perfectly safe. However, the docks at the ferry terminals may mysteriously sink
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
$3 million awarded to victims of harmless petroleum industry practice
source: america.aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man walks through town center squirting women with a water pistol filled with his own urine, now finds himself in a wee bit of trouble
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Organic aquaculture shrimp facility hiring over 500 workers to pull their little legs off so you don't have to
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Once again let's be clear on this: every "horny 16-year old girl" that wants to chat online is really an undercover cop-unless they are a youth pastor who is trying to catfish young boys into sending him naked selfies
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Dogs and cats are capable of love, at least biochemically. Your dog loves steak
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Is First Lady Michelle Obama joining the cast of NBC's Community? Will anyone notice?
source: tv.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Man who threw Molotov cocktail into Brooklyn convenience store probably won't get his bottle deposit back
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Indy Channel)
 
 
 
Man critical after being shot, crashing car. Well, of course he is. What's he supposed to say, 'Thanks'?
source: theindychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Due to the increase in Americans' weight, dude ranches have been forced to add draft horses to their stables
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Do you have a go-to recipe for veal if you're trying to impress? Have any tips for preparing veal to make it a knock out?
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(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Giant crucifix dedicated to Pope John Paul II falls and crushes a man in what is in no way a bad omen whatsoever
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby clouded leopards make their public debut at the Denver Zoo (w/awww pics)
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Fat teenager loses 168 pounds, is surprised to discover that he's actually David Beckham
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikimedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: Improve the International Space Station
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(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
DC restaurant consultant accused of intentionally tanking sales at five restaurants so he could buy them at bankruptcy. And stealing a Vespa
source: blogs.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
One DIY project you probably should skip: Fecal transplants
source: raps.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man walks into lingerie shop, reveals his own secrets
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
"She asked for it," man tells police after asking why he murdered his own mother
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Wire)
 
 
 
After being accused of not doing enough to prevent sexual violence on campus, Columbia University officials apparently decided to make it up to the gals by making them a cake, you know, a real nice one with flowers and everything
source: thewire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
California's fire season has been expanded a bit, now runs from May 1st to April 30th
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
The Ku Klux Klansman who shot up a Jewish community center was once arrested for picking up a black transvestite prostitute. Oy vey
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
"We weren't expecting to hear calls to prayer from mosques on our holiday to Turkey. Now give us our money back"
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
Man successfully robs ice cream store with syringe "full of AIDS." In a related story, Baskin Robbins pulls Crackhead Crunch from its list of flavors
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Apparently when you build extra cabins on top of a ferry and carry three times as much cargo as is safe, it can fall over and sink. Who knew?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
From the "things you thought only happened in movies/long running '70s sitcoms" file: five castaways stranded on a desert Island are rescued after a helicopter spots the giant "SOS" they carved in a nearby sandbar
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(When On Earth)
 
 
 
If you're looking to shake up your typical dining experience, you should go to this restaurant in Spain where there's constantly the equivalent of a 7.8 earthquake moving things around
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(ABC Local)
 
 
 
The moral of the story is that you should never bring something that you just happened to find in a plastic bottle in an alley to school for show and tell, no matter how cool it looks
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(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
Now that the Cornish people of Cornwall have been officially recognized by Britain as a minority, here are 22 Cornish words and phases we should all start using. Missing is f*cking cornholes. Wonder why?
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(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Muslim cleric says 9/11 museum video on Al Queda will cause prejudiced views, as if New Yorkers had nice thoughts about an organization that flew jets into the two biggest towers in Manhattan
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(WTOP)
 
 
 
Chihuahua bites man. Man threatens owner. Owner gets machete. Seems reasonable
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
If you like floating down rivers polluted with urine, alcohol, cigarette butts, Styrofoam lids, used condoms, plastic bags, and empty sunblock bottles, things are looking up. Tubing season is almost here
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Officials fear that the nearly four million people traveling to witness the canonization of two popes at the Vatican will cripple the city's infrastructure. If only there were a supernatural force they could pray to and ask for good fortune
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(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The Marshall Islands: Hey, remember how you guys tested your new super weapons on us? Yeah, we're suing all of you nuclear nations to disarm because you treated us like assholes
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(The Local)
 
 
 
Boob ban: French government minister bans female staff from showing any cleavage at work
source: thelocal.fr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
You may think Oregon is progressive, but politicians decided abortion is not a clean source of renewable energy
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
FDA to tobacco companies: No, you assholes, putting the letter "e" in front of "cigarette" doesn't make it OK for children. Welcome to Regulation Town, population: you
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(Telegram)
 
 
 
Caption this driver
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Affluenza strikes again as tech CEO avoids jail time despite being caught on tape beating and kicking his girlfriend 117 times
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
A downside of living near Disney World? A seemingly large amount of homeless people are struggling to find permanent housing around there because of its price
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Map shows what the world will look like if the ice caps melt. Basically it's surfs up in Philadelphia, an ark for King George and a solution to the Israel-Arab dispute
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
LAPD: Hey NYPD, you guys really blew it with your Twitter campaign to create good will. NYPD: Ummmmm... you guys might want to look at your Twitter campaign
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(Metro)
 
 
 
Protip: If you're looking to land at any one of these ten airports in the near future, pack some extra underwear
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kinston Free Press)
 
 
 
Fire department assists in prostate exam
source: kinston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
There's a special place in hell for people who steal bronze vases from grave sites to sell for scrap metal
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this beer break
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
"I heard the weight and I was like, 'Oh my God.' It validated me because I was in a lot of pain when I was pregnant, so to hear the size, it made sense," Says the woman who gave birth to a mini sumo wrestler weighing 14 pounds, 8 ounces
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The last time chlorine was weaponized was World War I after all sides realized just how terrible a weapon it truly was. Naturally, it's reappeared in Syria, where the civil rules of war don't apply
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(KATU)
 
 
 
Woman files $275K lawsuit after vicious pit bull attack because owner knew the animal had "abnormally dangerous propensities in attacking people." Did I say pit bull? I meant duck
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
The wasps, they are mocking us--or sending a message
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJLA Washington DC)
 
 
 
News: Man arrested trying to flee the country after raping girl. Fark: Saudi exchange student who raped 16-year-old daughter of his host family. What the Fark: He was having an affair with his host mom, and she tried to help him escape
source: wjla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Florida retirement community sinkhole 2: Electric Boogaloo
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Patriot rancher Cliven Bundy would like to explain to you about how the Negro race thinks
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Thousands dead in Syria...kidnapped schoolgirls in Africa...a ferry full of dead Korean kids...rioting in Brazil....wait, hold on. NEW YORKERS ARE CHILLY BECAUSE TALL BUILDINGS CAST SHADOWS
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sioux City Journal)
 
 
 
This just proves that PETA members are just a bunch of turkeys
source: siouxcityjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Pocono Mountain resort to hold first-ever beer festival. One catch: "Nudity is required at the beer festival area & in the pools and hot tub"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Held by the TSA for 40 minutes and given a "intrusive physical body inspection" because you didn't want them to x-ray your breast-milk? That's a $75,000 legal settlement
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Onion)
 
 
 
Activists release horrifying video showing how meat products are eaten
source: theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Heroic Houston-area camel toe calls police after seeing teens breaking into neighbor's home (Not safe for work)
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Security guard breaks down door to a portable toilet, finds the rotting body of a homeless man inside. Police believe he froze to death and was forgotten for months
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
It's legal to sell pot in Colorado, but not if you're in 4th grade
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Ronald McDonald gets a hip new look
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Woman spends $15,000 on surgery to look Photoshopped, and it works, you can tell by the pixels (w/before and after pics)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Old and Busted: Two lesbians getting married. New Hotness: Three lesbians getting married
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 468: "The Great Outdoors". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 23, 2014
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Woman ransacks store and punches seven year old because the store owner wouldn't exchange a jar of coins for bills. She crazy
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vancouver Sun)
 
 
 
Large 6.7-richter earthquake strikes Vancouver Island. Preliminary reports estimate moderate damage equal to 0.29 Stanley Cup riots
source: vancouversun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Texas teacher: "OK, kids, it's free reading time. Read anything you want." Second grader: "Awesome, I have my Bible." Texas teacher: "OMG INAPPROPRIATE"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Detroit airport now offers brand new $75,000 bathroom. Fark: for service dogs. Your dog chose the steak over the fish
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Bark, bark, BARK... (translation: I'm stuck to my chair. I'm so very scared. Help.)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
NPR asks the question: Why do so many people on the internet enjoy spoiling TV shows for people who haven't seen them yet? Subby asks the question: Why do so many internet idiots expect to read threads about a show after it airs and not see spoilers?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this remotely unique moment
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Russia sends 50 year old bombers to invade Britain
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
You should visit a dentist at least once every six months. Unless of course the dentist randomly pulls out all your teeth for no reason on the first visit, then you can skip the second one
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Police attach explosives to rental car for training exercise, forget to tell the company which car before they rent it out
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Village Voice)
 
 
 
True story: Jay-Z once wrote a song for Bugs Bunny
source: blogs.villagevoice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
Most people use log splitters to break up their firewood. This guy decided to use a frieght train instead
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Man tries everything he can think of to avoid a DUI. Well, everything except not drinking and driving
source: blog.sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Home defense tip: Those pithy, tough-guy, "kill lines" that movie action heroes spit out while shooting people? They don't sound nearly as good when being played for jurors at your murder trial
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Right Wing Watch)
 
 
 
Wife refuses to have sex with you? Well she was probably molested as a child and that's grounds for a divorcin' says Pat Robertson
source: rightwingwatch.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"You were collecting disability and were singing in a metal band. Yeah it's hardcore but that is fraud, you know"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Bill O'Reilly asks Bundy Militia member:"How does your protest differ from Occupy Wall Street?" Bundy supporter:"Mr. Bundy is providing the country with beef." Hey everybody: FREE STEAKS
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this relaxed show of force
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Anomalous Mind Management, Abductee, Contactee Helpline stages inaugural conference to help those who believe they've had contact with aliens. Organizers hope the event will allow people to share their experiences without being teased
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rocketnews 24)
 
 
 
To ensure motorists remain alert, small town replaces neutral road markings on narrow street with more to-the-point phrases like "AH DANGER", "SLOWLY" and "Things will jump out at you"
source: en.rocketnews24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
The worst part about faking your own kidnapping: Discovering your mom wouldn't pay $200 to get you back
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Priest uses church money to buy condom. No, wait, condo, not condom
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Those melonfarmers in the Russian parliament are making a melonfarming law that bans melonfarming swearing in melonfarming public, the melonfarmers
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
Pardon me, Mr. President Obama? Sir? Nigeria has oil AND they're hiding Islamic Extremists like Al Queda AND I have evidence that they are transporting dangerous materials in trucks. Yours truly, Parafujo Mpira
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It's a good thing that you want someone to take action about all the cars that have crashed through your house in the last two years but maybe you need to move your family in the meantime
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
IRS gives out over $1 million in bonuses to employees who are delinquent in paying their taxes. Well, at least now they have some cash to cover the fines
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Malay Mail)
 
 
 
US says its troops only "assisted" Yemeni forces in taking out an Al-qaeda bombmaker responsible for the "underwear bomb" plot- by, ya know, flying them to the exact spot of the ambush, giving them guns and pointing out the guy to shoot
source: themalaymailonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
63 killed on Congo train when the band played the music too fast
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
"Son, there comes *hic* a time *hic* when you become a man. *hic* here, take the *hic* keys, you're driving *hic* home tonight." "But dad, I'm only 13 and have never driven before." "You're a man *hic* now son. Do it ^hic^"
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Is that a loaded gun in your vagina or are you just not very happy to see me?
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Germany warns of war in Europe. This is not a repeat from 1938
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Smithsonian Magazine)
 
 
 
"It's hard to fault Foote for not going into greater detail about the underlying science, since he is, at that very moment, boring a hole in Haning's skull"
source: smithsonianmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
Man gets fitted with bionic eye, claims to be the son of Scott Summers and Jean Grey
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Only the Shadow knows who it was that was caught on camera at this South American soccer game that freaked out fans by gliding through the crowd
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WUSA9)
 
 
 
If you took an ambulance for a four block spin last night, the Montgomery County Police would like a word with you
source: wusa9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
The most extreme conspiracy theory yet in the missing Malaysia Airlines plane drama: Passenger jet was shot down by American military forces and they're now trying to cover it up
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Apparently these milk executives thought the public was of the opinion, "You know, I would buy more milk if milk commercials made a lot more innuendos." This is what 8 oz. of protein looks like. [video goodness]
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Everyone in the US South discovered to be African American
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Amazon strikes a deal with HBO in order to air classic shows like "The Sopranos" and "The Wire." In other news those two shows are considered classics now
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Amazon)
 
 
 
One's career options are limited when one's name is Drupak Kunley and one's penis is known as the "Thunderbolt of Flaming Wisdom." One can be a rap artist or the patron saint of Buddhist Bhutan
source: amazon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The ongoing search for the missing Malaysian airliner has revealed a serious hurdle for China's plans to become the dominant naval power in the Pacific: Navies need friendly ports to resupply in and most of China's neighbors don't like China much
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
According to a 'planetary defense group,' it is just a matter of time before a planet-killing asteroid hits us. EVERYBODY PANIC. Wait, planetary defense group? You mean... the Justice League?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
A list of license plates rejected by Florida DMV. A55 RGY unavailable for comment. (Warning: subby not competent enough to make deslided work)
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
UC Florida student claims he was rejected by a fraternity for being too gay to paddle the asses of his brothers and stand around in a circle of guys wanking it
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(World Review)
 
 
 
Poland's military is made up of clanky Soviet-era equipment. An upgrade was scheduled with European involvement. Then Russia invaded Ukraine and Poland decided it wanted BIG AMERICAN GUNS (and helicopters and missiles)
source: worldreview.info   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inforum)
 
 
 
"His story is that several officers attacked him wearing full chemical suits, and they sprayed him with chemicals and put him in a shed," Wilkie said. "So, he's hallucinating"
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(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Today is St George's Day in England, kind of like President's Day if George Washington was a Turkish dragon slayer who never actually went to the United States
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Aero-News Newwork)
 
 
 
♪ If a model finds a body while it's on the fly, The FAA says that's no hobby, you must let them die ♫
source: aero-news.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Pro tip: Calling the real life SWAT team to swat out your opponent is not the proper way to avenge your destruction in "Call of Duty"
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
"We believe that this road sign reading 'WARNING: ZOMBIES AHEAD' is a joke. But we haven't been brave enough to drive beyond the sign"
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Anti-thigh gap jeans are here, because we must not allow a thigh-fat gap
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Britain's fearless mutant rat population is mutating, getting more intelligent at being able to not get caught
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
"NJ family sues over under God." Hmm -- preposition trouble. Apparently they don't to be dictated to from about down out of above or something
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
First economic sanctions, now North Koreans are barred from learning how to make cheese
source: thelocal.fr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this magic picture box
source: l3.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PCWorld)
 
 
 
First online spam sent 20 years ago. Nigerian prince now serving his fourth term as king
source: pcworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
"The next time you're cleaning your fish pond, remember to turn off the ultraviolet sterilization lamp"
source: yourhealth.asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Everett Herald)
 
 
 
A man celebrating his birthday pees on a van. Then things get weird
source: heraldnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
I think the internet is officially being catfished by raunchy sorority girl emails
source: uproxx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gloucester Citizen)
 
 
 
Meet the British gamer girl living life as a fully blown Disney Princess
source: gloucestercitizen.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Supreme Court gives police the power to execute searches based solely on anonymous tips. There is no way that this can backfire
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Community News)
 
 
 
Move over, Grinch: Girls caught fencing stolen Easter bunnies
source: londoncommunitynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Experts say eating flowers could be good for your health, increase your stamena
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVQ Billings)
 
 
 
Gun silencer sales are skyrocketing, in case you hadn't heard
source: ktvq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Paint-filled eggs falling out of my vagina? It's more likely than you think (Not safe for work)
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Dumb: A child molester from Georgia travels to Colorado. Dumber: while wearing his ankle monitor tracker. Dumbest: To meet an underage girl who was actually a cop in a undercover sting operation
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Study finds men still interested in sex even when in severe pain. "It's only a flesh wound"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
Defendant afraid tattooed mirror-image letters spelling out the word "murder" on his neck might just prejudice the jury in his murder trial. O Rly?
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 22, 2014
(The Local)
 
 
 
Nice: Providing wood for public Easter bonfire. Not so nice: With live machine gun ammunition hidden in it
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
You're a girl and wear pants to prom? GTFO
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chattanooga Times Free Press)
 
 
 
Police: Man 'armed' with potato attempts robbery in Rhode Island. I can defend myself against fresh fruit but a potato is a whole nother story
source: timesfreepress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Fark: Naval Academy lacrosse player threatens cab driver with a knife. Farker: A butter knife
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Hey officer, could you keep an eye on my really nice, expensive bike while I run into Walmart and grab a few things?
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Since 2000, CEOs of fast food chains have seen their salaries quadruple. Their employees, however, have seen their salaries decrease by a minimum of 1%
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
The New York Police Department just got a, shall we say, brutal lesson in social media
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Cardiologist accuses strip club into drugging him into signing off on extravagant charges. So he went back three more times to be sure
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Always know where your towel is. Also your toilet paper. Especially if you might appear in this week's Mugshot Roundup
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
When questioned after his arrest for rape of 10-year-old, man explains, "I'm not the normal guy that everyone thinks I am"
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time Lightbox)
 
 
 
Photoshop this street viewer
source: timethemoment.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Student's buzzkill grandma gets school to stop giving kids Mountain Dew before tests
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
When you make a "run for the border" in your car, try not to do it at 2:00 a.m. when you're shiathammered drunk. That goes double if you're a Florida state representative
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
According to US News & World Report, seven of the best high schools in the nation are located in a state not exactly known for the intelligence of its residents
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Texas, where pig farms have better air-condition and temperature regulations than the state jails
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
The Texas fertilizer plant explosion that killed 14 people could have been prevented if the company hadn't stored the explosive material in combustible bins that were housed in a combustible building that lacked fire sprinklers
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
This article starts out discussing clickbait headlines. You won't believe what happens next
source: theamericanreader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Crooks & Liars)
 
 
 
Burning Man organizers to host 240 band rules-free, law-free festival across from Bundy ranch. Trolling Level is over 9000
source: crooksandliars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Fark: In the previous calendar year there were 100 cases of MERS. FARK: In the last two weeks there have been 100. MERS kill rate is 33 %. Farkkkkk
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
Reason 496 Why New Orleans is the greatest city in America: Crawfish Strudel
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Oh those nutty TSA agents and their harmless pranks
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WVEC)
 
 
 
But your honor...we were planning to steal the booze, then sell it to buy milk for the kids we left home alone....we swear
source: wvec.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this happy bride-to-be
source: media4.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
New invention turns your cellphone into a microscope. This will really help the next time I need to send somebody a picture of my junk
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
County sheriff to hold Shotgun Shootout to raise funds for children's charities like free eye patches for kids
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Manchester Evening News)
 
 
 
OMG a gruesome MAGGOT crawled into one little pistachio out of millions and millions that are put into Tesco bags. That's just NUTS
source: manchestereveningnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Philly)
 
 
 
"Adams presented numerous items which were set aside for sale to the customer service desk in hopes of convincing them he actually purchased the items and needed to return them without a receipt"
source: myfoxphilly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Iowa City Press-Citizen)
 
 
 
When walking the dog goes wrong: "Steele then grabbed a plastic sack and displayed it in a threatening manner, according to police"
source: press-citizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
It's all fun and games until you get arrested for stabbing a relative in the leg during an argument. And try and stay awake in your mug shot
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KLTV Tyler)
 
 
 
I'm sorry the co-signer of your student loan died. So pay me. Right now. All of it
source: kltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Having crippled voting rights and campaign finance reform, SCOTUS now takes the axe to affirmative action
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Fairfax County school system in Virginia announces new, "sshh, it's OK, precious snowflakes, you can sleep in as late as you want" policy
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Antisemitic mayor, forced to resign over antisemitic comments, has a sad because people called him antisemitic
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
All these worlds are yours, except Europa. Attempt no landing there. Use them together. Use them in peace
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The U.S. no longer leads the world for after-tax median income. Which country leads now? Just look a little bit north, eh? (w/enlightening infographic)
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Wire)
 
 
 
Sherpas to Tourists: If you want to "Climb" Mt Everest this year, you gonna have to carry your own got-damn luggage, 'cause we OUT
source: thewire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
How Americans Die, usually face down in a bowl of ranch dressing
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVQ Billings)
 
 
 
Woman attacks man with coffee cup, which is grounds for felony assault
source: ktvq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Getting arrested for wearing a red thong and no pants on a subway train after making love to a bench while smoking crack is no way to go through life, son
source: blog.sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
An iceberg that's twice the size of Atlanta has slipped into the ocean and IS HEADING RIGHT FOR US
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Kid who got his face kicked by a train conductor will be laughing all the way to the bank
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Food Riot)
 
 
 
"No one is perfectly wonderful or terrible. Guy Fieri advocates for children's charities, and James Patterson promotes literacy programs. We need dimension, after all. Bagging restaurant freebies is how I'm an asshole"
source: foodriot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Taking NSAIDs? You may want to stop because THEY'RE KILLING YOU
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Man dies from gunshot wounds...22 years after he was shot
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
Parents chicken out on naming their baby what would be the greatest name ever
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: