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Sun January 05, 2014
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Tiger Mom, not having pissed off enough people with her first book, has written a new book about how some ethnic and religious groups are inherently better than others
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
A thousand people have already clicked this headline. What are you waiting for?
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
What's worse than crashing your plane in Aspen and killing your co-pilot? Doing it in front of LeAnn Rimes and Kevin Nealon
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Because men who buy Corvette Stingrays have absolutely nothing to prove, ever, GM is adding dashcams to all new models that create a video-game like HUD. On the plus side, our national penis length average is about to go up a little bit
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier Mail)
 
 
 
"We had just opened the pool and a lap swimmer said they didn't want to alarm me but there was a crocodile swimming beside them in the pool"
source: couriermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Apparently leaving a USB drive taped to the bathroom wall in an airplane will freak people out
source: usnews.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Reporter does something useful by capturing pictures of homeless men, one who turns out to be a missing man starting 4 days previous. Next day, the police retrieve him for loved ones
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
♪♫ It's raaaaaaining (parts of) men ♪♫
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Photoshop Michael Bloomberg's official portrait
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Curbed)
 
 
 
Purer-than-thou microhome owner slams other microhome owners for selling out, wanting to create McMansions on their tiny plot of land instead of cabins with beanbag walls, tin-can siding and used TJ's bag wallpaper
source: curbed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KXLH Helena)
 
 
 
Dumbass teens haze moose on ski run, then post it to Facebook with the caption,"Just chasing a moose while snowboarding...no big deal." National Forest officials: "Is your $250 fine a big deal?"
source: kxlh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Oil industry officials are shocked, shocked, I say, to learn of confirmed groundwater pollution near fracking sites
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Wyoming Highway Patrol: DO NOT BRING COLORADO MARIJUANA INTO WYOMING
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Standard)
 
 
 
Nuclear-armed Asian peninsula with millions of hungry citizens and strained relations with its neighbors and the US successfully tests new rocket that could deliver warheads anywhere in the world. Maybe we can get John McCain to sing a Bombay song
source: business-standard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Uses for duct tape: home repairs, protecting glass during storms, making crazy prom dresses and wallets, fixing the Fukushima nuclear meltdown, plumbing leaks... wait a minute, go back a couple
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
So it turns out that organic food may be the cause of the recent rise in autism
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Bishop complains Church is 'dumbing down' baptism. Oh, go soak your head
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shorpy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these sailors in their rubber boat
source: shorpy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Despite rationing and emergency deliveries, Colorado will run out of legal pot "within days." Everybody ... like, panic, dude
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Campus Reform)
 
 
 
20-year-old entitled rich white girl who got slammed for her essay defending being an entitled rich white girl slams the media for ignoring fact she's also gay because the media would have never dared slam a gay person. No, really
source: campusreform.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Local girl, 12, gets tongue stuck to flag pole. "She's going to be very popular"
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
President of Zimbabwe Robert Mugabe has collapsed, possibly dead. UPDATE: or not
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Snow cripples Chicago as airlines cancel more than 1,200 flights due to SNOWMAGEDDON '14
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Enterprise News)
 
 
 
Backyard zip lines are fun, or in technical legal langauge "risky and uninsurable"
source: enterprisenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
No matter what it is, the one thing you can safely assume about it is that you're Doing It Wrong
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
After three years of civil war, Syria may partition into an anti-West, Iran-backed West Syria and an anti-West, al Qaeda-backed North Syria
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
Pope Francis continues his trolling of Catholic traditionalists, calls for the Church to be more inclusive of the children of gay couples and divorced parents
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Nothing says fellowship in New York like helping someone dig their car out of a huge snowdrift and then carjacking them at gunpoint
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
"In the event of a water landing, your plane will become a work of art. Enjoy your flight with us"
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Man forced to deal with the knowledge that his son is gay and sleeping with his sister's boyfriend, so he does the sensible thing and writes to an internet columnist about it
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Traditional burials are dying in Florida as over half of residents would rather shoot their loved ones in the sky, turn them into a locket, or just dump them in the Gulf of Mexico
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Sales of pot in Colorado are so strong, retailers are limiting sales to one eighth of an ounce to avoid a "marijuana shortage"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twinsburg Bulletin)
 
 
 
Forecasters are predicting that tomorrow will be like The Day After Tomorrow
source: twinsburgbulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Just a reminder, the trunk of your car makes for a handy holding area for relatives who are drunk
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsvine)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Tarot cards. New hotness: Asparagus
source: carloz.newsvine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Who would have thought something like this could happen to such a well liked millionaire landlord?
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Now that she's free to speak her mind, NASA's Lori Garver suggests a smarter US space exploration strategy might not involve a giant expensive rocket with no clear destination
source: blog.chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Pilot union spokesman Mr. Van Winkle says that new rules on pilot rest are "A major safety achieveme............ I'M UP Where was I? Ah yes, achievement"
source: frequentbusinesstraveler.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Edmonton Journal)
 
 
 
Say what you will about Obamacare, but in Canada they give out free flu shots at inner-city bars
source: edmontonjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this water flicker
source: l1.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
In Miami pedestrians are encouraged to thank drivers who actually stop and obey traffic laws
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Vintage salad recipes that pretty much make healthy eating (or any eating at all) impossible
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Make sure you give your cake baker some guidance on exactly what you'd like, or they'll just get creative
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
In another attempt to get Arizona its own tag, Steven Seagal is thinking about running for governor there
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
The rare time you want to think about a Barbara Bush discharge
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTOO Juneau)
 
 
 
Live from Juneau, where it's inexplicably likely warmer than where you are, it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents, 2+ hours of music hosted live by a farker. LGT stream, or look for KRNN on TuneIn
source: ktoo.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat January 04, 2014
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's my party, and I'll ________ if I want to
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
Amazon drones can only carry a few pounds. A helicopter is used for important heavier packages
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Identification of 1846 Abraham Lincoln mystery letter finally solved after researchers give it their best shot
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Man dies after failing to realize most tree branches aren't black cords attached to utility poles
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
Blackberry decides to focus on a more profitable venture: patent trolling
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme challenge: Combating winter (LGT inspiration)
source: rosphoto.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
A dispute between neighbors leads one man to get his gun and later barricade himself inside a home. This fight was over: A) Noise B) Money or C) Shoveling snow
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
U.S. icebreaker on its way to assist Australian icebreaker sent to help Chinese icebreaker dispatched to free Russian icebreaker
source: uscgnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Hello LaGuardia Airport: Can we have runway Major Deegan Expressway? We're coming in low
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Only a few taboo topics are immediate fightin' words in laid-back Iowa: like talkin' trash about against a man's mamma, his combine harvester or his PB&J sammich
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Residents living along the crookedest street in the world upset that tourists flock to see the crookedest street in the world
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Seattle woman has three-hour orgasm that lands her in the hospital, her boyfriend in the hall of fame
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO TV)
 
 
 
Having a flag display, in your HOA, for Seahawks FOOTBALL is somewhat OK. But having a 'Murican flag in green with a big '12' over the stars is sacrilegious
source: kirotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Turns out, parents really are responsible for creating entitled, douchebaggy children. Obvious tag wants a ribbon just for participating in this headline
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Magazine)
 
 
 
Chicago politicians defend 2nd highest property taxes in the nation under the rationale that "since it's normally too cold or too dangerous to go outside anyway, people who live here use their houses more than people in other states do"
source: chicagomag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pooped pup
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HyperVocal)
 
 
 
Awesome pic, but yeah, sorry about your historic building and all
source: hypervocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(US Senate)
 
 
 
♫♬ You got a lotta nerve ♪♩ To say you are my friend♬♪
source: sanders.senate.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Two women with £150,000 worth of cocaine hidden under wigs can expect toupee dearly for their hair-raising stunt
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
16,000 bottles of beer on the wall, 16,000 bottles of beer. Take one down, pass it around, 15,999 bottle of beer on the wall
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YourTango)
 
 
 
What do you wear on your first day of Orgasm School?
source: yourtango.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Snowstorms do not disprove global warming. We're looking at you, Trump
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Pope calls nunnery on New Year's Eve, has to leave a message on their machine. "What are the nuns doing that they can't answer?"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wisconsin State Journal)
 
 
 
Wind chill to hit -50°F in Wisconsin. Stay safe, Wisconsin Farkers
source: host.madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sucks)
 
 
 
Conversations on sex lacking between doctors and teens. "One-on-one confidential time during annual visits is recommended." Duke sucks
source: dukehealth.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington University St. Louis)
 
 
 
Psychotics love alcohol, liquor and drugs more than you do. Unless you're psychotic, that is
source: news.wustl.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man who intentionally keeps his lawn overgrown with weeds and leaving it a disaster gets fined $130,000 for having an unsightly yard
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Dude... leaving your wife and kids by faking your suicide to start a pot farm after you were indicted over a $21m bank fraud is soooo not cool
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Cuban car buyers in shock at foreign car prices that just went on the market, finally realize that it's not 1959
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPSD Local 6 Paducah)
 
 
 
Firemen bang chicks in city vehicles. Mayor shrugs, "They're men"
source: wpsdlocal6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
Colorado marijuana sales reported to be three times as high as they were before legalization. Which is also true of the customers
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Deputies work on figuring out whether man was intoxicated when he drove his car into a lake Friday evening... while naked. Subby is eager to hear other explanations, besides the tag
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
Dying man achieves dream of hijacking a Krispy Kreme delivery bus
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man who claims to have fired the shot that killed Bin Laden is far too fat and old to be a Navy Seal. I should know. I was in the Core
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
 
 
Visit beautiful Helsinki. Come for the reindeer kebabs, stay for the naked swimming
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Edvantage)
 
 
 
Where were all the hot Asian teachers dressed as fairies to alleviate children's fear on the first day back to school when I was a kid?
source: edvantage.com.sg   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these children in the snow
source: artsait.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
"Well, come on all of you big strong men. Uncle Sam needs your help again." We did it all for nothing
source: worldnews.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RYOT.org)
 
 
 
Two tiny kittens abandoned in the snow, what might have happened to them we will never know, since one good samaritan went out of his way to make sure they would survive to join us here on Caturday
source: ryot.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
If your name is Abigale, Christopher or Carolyn and you were missing some presents under the tree this year, the Oak Harbor, Washington police would sincerely like to have a little chat with you
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
In 1944 Parisians watched a half-hour dogfight that ended when the American flew his Mustang THROUGH the Eiffel tower to shoot down the German plane. The US pilot just passed at 92 after spending 70 years clanging whenever he walked
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Utah man vows to starve himself until Utah stops issuing same-sex marriage licenses. Get a brain, Mormans
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Cool: You get a vintage 70's stereo system for free, including turntables. Awesome: system is in perfect condition. OMG MY EARS JUST CAME: vintage stereo system is the studio equipment formerly owned by The Carpenters
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
How do you know your dentist drilled too deep? Brain damage
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
If you're a school district using Twitter and Facebook to communicate important messages to families and students, make sure that you get your dates right and don't tell everyone students are due back a day earlier than scheduled
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Luis Obispo Tribune)
 
 
 
"Dear Samantha: I hope this card finds you well and you are doing OK in prison. Just wanted to wish you a Merry ChristMETH hint hint. Love, Dumbass"
source: sanluisobispo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri January 03, 2014
(WJLA Washington DC)
 
 
 
Falls Church, Virginia takes the "Knockout Game" up a notch, introduces the "Stab a Random Kid Game"
source: wjla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
The secret to well-behaved children: booze
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Woman goes in for routine fertility surgery, then winds up getting a hysterectomy and suffering a cancer scare shortly afterwards as doctors couldn't figure out what went wrong. That's when they found the glove left inside her
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man claims he has eaten nothing but McDonald's for three months and ended up losing 37 lbs, lowering his cholesterol from 249 to 170 and also saw his bad cholesterol fall from 173 to 113
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Think you're having a bad day? At least you didn't get shot by a police Taser and have one of the prongs puncture your right eyeball
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Not News: Event in St. Petersburg, FL is cancelled, News: Due to cold weather, Fark: The temperatures are dipping down to 45 degrees tonight
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
 
 
Colorado two-year-old tests positive for pot. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: denver.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Did a photographer accidentally capture a picture of a ghost? Short answer: Really?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Couple doesn't get why the city keeps ticketing them for parking their cars in their driveway with the ass-end of the vehicles hanging out across the city sidewalk. "This whole thing is odd"
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
One of Iowa's "People to Watch" is a 40 year old housewife who writes homosexual romance novels. No, really
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this river of chile peppers
source: l1.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Yo, dawg. We heard you needed an ice rescue, so we sent an ice rescue for your ice rescue
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Just in time for the first weekend of 2014, it's the Mugshot Roundup's Best of 2013
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Well, if you're gonna crash your car, might as well crash it somewhere convenient
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCCI Des Moines)
 
 
 
When your breathalyser reading just says "Hi" you know you're in deep shiat with the police. Also, your liver
source: kcci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Ten cheeses you are probably pronouncing incorrectly. Strangely missing: Murican
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Today's music teacher giving extracurricular skin flute lessons to a student brought to you by Overbrook High School in New Jersey
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Skinny mother of four proves she can disconnect her jaw as naturally as other joints as she wins sammich-eating contest (with NEEDS-a-sammich pic)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Science finds that the secret to living to be really, really old lies with people who have been able to become really, really old
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Monday: Man crashes U-Haul truck, sets house ablaze, robs another and steals frozen elk meat. Friday: He's found fully clad in hot tub with machete. Interrogators can't wait to hear about rest of week
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Remember when George Zimmerman's girlfriend detailed his violent episodes to police before recanting? Someone else did too and they leaked a video of it to the press
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
The "Arts & Entertainment" network no longer offers any programming even remotely resembling either art or entertainment. Discuss
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
"Don't believe I'm a cop, huh? Let me drop trou in this IHOP to prove you wrong"
source: thesent.nl   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Bay Area)
 
 
 
Northern California's Megamillions winner left winning ticket in pile on bedroom dresser for two weeks as he obliviously went on vacation: "I think I went to San Jose"
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newstrack India)
 
 
 
The beatings will continue until morale improves, my special little snowflakes
source: newstrackindia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Six-year-old girl has her lip ripped off in Terrierist attack
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Believer Magazine)
 
 
 
People assume that Nancy Kerrigan was a strict progression of victimization to self-pitying mewling, but actually, from a nonlinear, non-subjective viewpoint, it's more like a big ball of wibbily wobbly, timey "why me"...stuff
source: believermag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Arachnophobia is cultural. This was proven with Doctor Who pictures. No, really
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Always good advice, but it always seems to need restating for some reason: "If you're going to line up for a food voucher, you might not want to pull up in a BMW"
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop someone interesting wearing this lovely hat
source: image.hannaandersson.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's a new year and everybody starts fresh. It's the very first Fark Weird News Quiz of 2014
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Family installs surveillance video to determine why their dog is suddenly injured and fearful, only to discover son having sex with it
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
The pot shops in Colorado are gouging you with inflated prices, and counting on the fact that you're too stoned to notice
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Is tourism destroying the world? Why not? Everything else is
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kare11)
 
 
 
Let's see what the weather is going to be like in Minnesota.... Oh my
source: kare11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
You know that rumor that Koreans eat dogs? Well, we were close
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Parents urged to "raise the child they have, not the child they want to have." Donald Rumsfeld's strategy in Iraq is now a parenting philosophy?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Finally, trade in that unused Starbucks gift card for something you can really use: porn
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
A lion walks into a bar. Bartender asks, "Where you from?" Lion says, "Florida of course, along with the naked man and the escaped kangaroo"
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
OJ Simpson has cancer, and wants to die at home, like his victims
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Johnson City Press)
 
 
 
88-year-old WWII veteran wants us to know that tree in his yard has sprouted...a woody, so to speak. Right there in Johnson City
source: johnsoncitypress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
Great Train Robber Ronnie Biggs gets the most badass outlaw funeral possible, including floral wreaths flipping off the cops (pics)
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Republic)
 
 
 
The world's most Instagrammed place is a mall in Thailand where you can sit in Angry Bird's lap
source: newrepublic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
The best Space photos of 2013
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Girl: I'm going to unfriend this boy on Facebook because he's becoming weird and abusive online. Boy: BOILING HOT WATER TO THE FACE
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Montreal copes with problem of drunken, homeless people yelling in the streets by tying them to utility poles so they can scream their new information concerning La Prostituée de Babylone to comparatively fewer people
source: montreal.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
I don't know what the hell is going on - so here's a cool ass picture of a father / daughter face plant in the freshly fallen snow
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kare11)
 
 
 
The Cs were covered in icebergs yesterday
source: kare11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
K-9 prison units now being used in prisons to detect illegal: a) narcotics, b) weapons, or c) cell phones
source: indianapublicmedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Germany rocked by old American bomb. It's not David Hasselhoff, but it was probably around the same age
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
As massive storm blasts eastern U.S. and Canada, Newfoundland residents urged by government to ration power. And not to try storing house electricity in buckets, like the last time
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Greenfield Recorder)
 
 
 
Q: If a state-owned bridge connects two towns, who clears snow off the sidewalk? A: A 12 year old boy, before he grew old enough to understand "not my responsibility"
source: recorder.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Man uses propane torch to thaw the frozen pipes in his house... ummm, success?
source: newssun.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
GMnOs
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
The stranger standing next to you at Space Center Houston might be looking for Uranus
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The Chinese have stolen another American-made product
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Mother ditches her children so she can enjoy some peace, quiet, and drinks at a local bar. That's not the worst of it; no, that came when she decided to fight police and paramedics in the parking lot of a restaurant
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
Here comes the flurry of seasonal articles about calling 'dibs' on shoveled-out parking spaces
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
92-year-old Japanese photographer has captured images from Hiroshima's aftermath to the effects of Fukushima, survived cancer and called out Emperor Hirohito for being a warmonger. Glowing set of uranium balls on this guy
source: lens.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Since all alcohol is sold in standard sizes, why shouldn't it be the same with food portions? "There are no stop signs that indicate when we have consumed enough"
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rocketnews 24)
 
 
 
Japan gets to the point and makes straight-up Disney Princess lingerie. Hey Drew, where's the "creepy" tag?
source: en.rocketnews24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flamer
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Fish and Game in Alaska wants to help keep moose off the roads and put them where they belong: In freezers across Alaska
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
Germans are now getting into the craft beer market by growing unique strains of hops. You probably wouldn't understand why, but this is big news to microbrew enthusiasts and home brewers
source: news.asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
In case you didn't think drones were already annoying, they're now being used to film local car dealership commercials. "Those video perspectives, I mean, they're awesome"
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
After taking a vacation in the middle of an eleven day power outage, head of a local utility refuses to resign and is thinking about adding a rate increase
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Hospital staff in Northern Virginia are turning away sick people on a frigid Thursday morning because they can't determine whether their Obamacare insurance plans are in effect
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
He pulls a knife, you pull a shovel. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send...Wait, what?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
London's subway routes were heavily influenced by: a) the Stig, b) the Time Lords, or c) up to 12,000 corpses beneath a single church causing parishioners to pass out or explode
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charlotte Observer)
 
 
 
News: town councilman tenders his resignation. Fark: in Klingon
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Not news: Mustang stolen from Enterprise Rent-A-Car. Fark: company sends $47K bill to the last person who rented it
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Yawn : woman posting selfie on Facebook. WTF: A blood splattered selfie pleading for help after being pistol whipped by her hubby. With helpful pic of what a pistol whipping hubby may look like (Graphic image in article)
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Western Medicine: "Ah, yous Chinese herbalists are a bunch of quacks" Science: Traditional herb is 3x more potent than modern painkillers and no side effects. Western Medicine: "Umm... about that"
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PCWorld)
 
 
 
If you have been looking for a reason to shut down the internet, meet Coinye West
source: pcworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Perhaps the most white-trash crime ever seen: a man wielding an axe with a trailer ball hitch attached to it robbed an electronic cigarette store. Ah, Council Bluffs, Iowa; there's a reason you're called Council Tuckey
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu January 02, 2014
(92.1 The Mic)
 
 
 
Wisconsin newspaper to stop printing birth announcements for fear of tipping off baby-stealers that can wait until it's old news
source: themic921.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Welcome to Disneyland, we know exactly where you are at all times. Have fun
source: entertainment.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
'Honey, I think I'm having the baby.' 'Hold on, babe, just want to pick up some of these rollback deals at Walmart'
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Topless Robot)
 
 
 
Who's ready for the next epic disaster movie, STONADOS, which is "JUST LIKE SHARKNADO--BUT WITH STONES." So...a normal tornado, tossing debris, basically
source: toplessrobot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Because when it comes to making love with your desired one, no place is as romantic as the back of a state-prison van
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
The country that poses the greatest thread to world peace is: A) Iran; B) Iraq; C) America
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Don't you just hate it when the future King of England photo bombs your selfie
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dangerous Minds)
 
 
 
Popcorn stock shoots through roof on news that Bill "The science guy" Nye will openly debate Ken "The creationist museum guy" Ham on February 4th
source: dangerousminds.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Good: Your girlfriend gets you a new set of tires for your anniversary. Bad: She tries to give them to you while they're in motion
source: articles.sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this combination bench coat tree thingee
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Woman files for divorce because she doesn't carrot all for the way her husband eats peas
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Miami)
 
 
 
Number of days since last Banana Incident: 0
source: nbcmiami.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
Lifehacker's "4 minute workout" sure looks like gay sex NTTAWWT
source: lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Intent on providing equal service to its US-based customers, Wal-Mart is issuing a recall in America too - for table & chair sets that randomly collapse and amputate your fingers at the same time
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
How cold is it in NYC? Even the idiots doing the polar bear plunge need to be hospitalized for hypothermia
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
The ground just ate someone else in Florida
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ChinaSmack)
 
 
 
I have no idea what you're talking about, so here's a picture of a Corgi with 2 ears of corn on its head, and a liquor bottle, and a melon, and 3 pudding cups, and 2 pop cans, and a pile of junk food, and a stack of coins, and
source: chinasmack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Woman reveals her addiction to drinking paint. Experts say it might be okay if she was thinner
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RYOT.org)
 
 
 
"Organ donors will soon have to choose whether or not to keep their faces"
source: ryot.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Military: "Gunshot wound to the head, a broken nose, black eye, loose teeth, acid burns on her genitals, and a trail of blood. Clearly a suicide"
source: themadmanchronicles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Food Nut)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Lamb is a tasty ingredient used in many different styles of cooking. Do you go for kebabs? Leg? Chops? Show is how it's done right.. and don't skimp on the pics
source: bbcgoodfood.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Foodbeast)
 
 
 
Here's how much hair, shellac, bones, beef fat and dog vagina pheromones you're actually eating
source: foodbeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zero Hedge)
 
 
 
Alan Greenspan says we should use "animal spirits" for doing economic modeling
source: zerohedge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
You'd think if there was one package delivery the USPS would make sure it didn't screw up, it would be one going from 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue to Obama's mother-in-law. But then this is the US Postal Service we're talking about
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Sure, the NSA's been spying on you for years, but now local police departments have joined forces and are fighting to bring an end to illegal surveillance. Just kidding, they're actually spying on you too
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Create an X-Ray for something that is somewhere it shouldn't be. LGT inspiration
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
London's 40+ abandoned tube stations are a great attraction for photographers, directors making zombie apocalypse movies
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Department Chair at UNC under indictment for creating hundreds of "phantom" classes that never actually met over the last 14 years. It's total coincidence that all the kids enrolled in those classes just happened to be football and basketball players
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Being locked in a cell, beaten by other inmates, and possibly pounded in the arse is one thing, but it's nothing compared to the horror of...The Loaf
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Looking at the weekend forecast for South Sudan, look for highs in the mid-30s, and conditions for an outbreak of watery diarrhea are perfect
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Dogs poop in line with Earth's magnetic field, says study
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London 24)
 
 
 
"I had a run in with a cow" and other terrible tax return excuses which definitely did not work
source: london24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Green Wednesday took Colorado by storm. Munchie Thursday expected to be equally devastating
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
If you discount the few short minutes when they were buried alive in molten lava, the life of the people of Pompeii was actually pretty sweet
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BusinessWeek)
 
 
 
Shockingly, there may have been a lot of waste, fraud, graft, and corruption involved in the building of the facilities for the Winter Olympics being held in the country that has replaced Italy for being most synonymous with organized crime
source: businessweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Twin New Year's babies born minutes apart also born a year apart
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Attempted lesbian hookup leads to toe being bitten off. In other news, somebody's New Year's Eve party was more fun than yours
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
Well..I mean...prison camps are technically structures...sooooo, yeah
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Was that wrong? Should I have not done that? I tell you I gotta plead ignorance on this rule against sleeping in the ceiling. Because if anyone had said anything at all
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The list of colleges most over-run with frat bros is topped by Welch College in TN, where 84% of the enrolled men are part of a fraternity, compared with the national average of 8.4%. School reportedly facing a critical shortage of top shelf p*ssy
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Caption this snickering seal
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
On Tuesday, Winnipeg, Manitoba had a high temperature of -31°C. On Tuesday, the rover Curiosity located on the planet Mars reported a high temperature of -29°C
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Freeman)
 
 
 
A word of advice for anybody whose parents named them after a fungal infection: don't get your name in the papers for swinging at cops after your friend got popped for New Year's Day DWI twice in 90 minutes
source: dailyfreeman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Boston, NY brace for the collapse of civilization as winter storm bringing huge amounts of snow, incredibly cold temperatures, bears down on the region. Or to translate that into Upper Midwest: it's gonna snow a little bit and then be a mite chilly
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Cream-O-Land Dairy settles charges of discrimination against employees with udders
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Pope Francis: So in 2014, how about we all try really hard to not be dicks to one another? Can we give that a shot?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Oh my God, Ben - you just filed a restraining order and I just had one filed against me - we have so much in common
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KETV Omaha)
 
 
 
Think 2013 was bad and 2014 holds worse? At least you aren't this family
source: ketv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cornish Guardian)
 
 
 
Spiderman knocked unconscious by a gang of men in a New Year's Eve assault. Police now searching for the Sinister Six
source: cornishguardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
~~~ \ [ -_-] / ~~~
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
All passengers confirmed rescued from icebound Antarctic ship, immediately crushed to death by avalanche of movie producers wanting the "real story"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
United Airlines say a "blockage in the lavatory" -- which a passenger identified as a soiled diaper -- caused a "Phoenix-to-Cleveland flight" -- which a flight attendant described as a cattle car to nowhere -- to be canceled
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WZZM 13 Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
As if bedbugs weren't a big enough reason to not take abandoned furniture
source: wzzm13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Fort Lauderdale politicians realize the best way to deal with the homeless might just be to give them homes
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Want to listen to some good jazz, have a drink in St. Louis? Try the Zodiac Lounge, but you better be at least 35 years old. On the plus side, the police have only been called to the bar once in the past 2 years
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Vasari's "Last Supper" restored with fish glue almost 50 years after it was damaged
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
It's a nice day out. You kids go out and play. (W/ Video of homemade outdoor ice rink)
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
The world's most dedicated Breaking Bad fan
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
Eleven-year-old girl won this game of hide-and-seek cleanly, but couldn't spin a story that would remove the stain of embarrassment and cheer her up. Oh well: no pain, no gain
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
To further prove that Jahi McMath has absolutely no chance of recovering, Terri Schaivo supporters have taken up the cause
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Abby Normal?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Emirates 24/7)
 
 
 
Thief thought he had given them the slip when he swallowed the stolen gold chain. Then the cops brought out the bananas
source: emirates247.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
A six-year-old boy handcuffed himself together with his parents' sex toy after getting bored during a family New Year's Eve party
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Where's the apartment building fire that's causing residents to perspire? SHAFT... You're damn right
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Korea Times)
 
 
 
If you're a college student failing all your classes and feeling pressure, you have three options: (a) hit the books, (b) drop out and find a job, or (c) hire prostitute, hang her, and have sex with her corpse. In China, one choice is inadvisable
source: koreatimes.co.kr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this gift giver
source: moresoon.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Thieves steal hive full of thousands of hibernating bees, avoid a sting operation
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WIBA 1310 Madison)
 
 
 
Burritos in Wisconsin are so overpriced that people are resorting to stealing them at gunpoint
source: wiba.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The average woman will kiss fifteen different men, have two long-term relationships, and get broken up with twice before she finds "the one"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Meet Sean Azzariti, the first person in Colorado to buy legal pot. Bonus: He's a veteran
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Those people you see at your new gym? They're smiling, but they hate you
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Saving the dying art of, um...talking and stuff
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Miami)
 
 
 
Human foot found in shoe on Florida beach. With helpful picture of what a boot looks like
source: nbcmiami.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Fox turns the tables on photographer
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Eleven reasons you should quit Facebook this year
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
FBI arrests dead banker after police smell something fishy
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kens 5 San Antonio)
 
 
 
Old and busted: bringing in the new year by lighting up 300 firecrackers. New hotness: bringing in the new year by lighting up 300 porta-potties
source: kens5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 452: "Booze 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed January 01, 2014
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
I was a hunter too, until I took an arrow to the heart
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
The dog that has become the latest internet meme known as "doge" is actually a rescue dog adopted by a 51 year-old kindergarten teacher. Wow. So cool. Much win
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Phoenix)
 
 
 
New Year's FAIL: Man allegedly kills his own son with an axe because he felt the demonic child was going to eat him
source: myfoxphoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: photos from the front lines of the Cola Wars
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Calgary Sun)
 
 
 
If you end up in a ditch after getting lost on country roads and think you are going to freeze to death it's probably better to bundle up and stay inside the car instead of, say, lighting your car on fire to stay warm
source: calgarysun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
Couple who bought tickets to a New Year's Eve party on Craigslist are shocked, SHOCKED to find out they were fake
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
If, for some reason, you are British and are running across Canada for charity while dressed as The Flash, some of the locals in Alberta might have a teensy-weensy problem with you
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Police seek robber disguised with duct tape, on the look out for a man with green and red suspenders
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Ariel Sharon's condition takes a turn for the worst. In other news, Ariel Sharon is still alive
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
This year's first person hit by random celebratory bullets falling from the sky is from: c) Los Angeles
source: highlandpark-ca.patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sauk Valley News)
 
 
 
Defense attorneys say their client had every reason to kill his wife because she was sending him harassing text messages
source: saukvalley.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Rhode Island wants you to know that it was them and not Taylor Swift that initiated her latest breakup (to the seawall outside her coastal home)
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
The world's 19 weirdest hangover remedies. Come for the deep fried canary, stay for the dried bull penis
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
It takes a special kind of loser to spend £1,000 trying to win a free meal for life competition without reading the fine print. Bonus: Loser poser w/loser pose
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Not for all the money in the world
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Man refuses girlfriend's request to spoon, so she reaches for the knife. Now she's forked
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
That fake picture showing what the Andromeda Galaxy would like if it were brighter and visible from Earth is actually pretty damn accurate
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop this novel conveyance
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Rehab is biased against women. Tag is for reliability of source
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Vapid Seattleite with made up name 'documents' an entire year spent at Starbucks. Bonus: pictorial goodness of her and her receipts
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida's time capsule is decidedly boring
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Do you play a video game until you have discovered all of its secrets or until you get bored with it and move on to the next game?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Gasoline addict arrested again for drinking from fuel pumps, finds his mileage does vary
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Mummer)
 
 
 
It's not every day a man can put on a sequined dress and walk down a street in Philly without repercussions. But today IS that day
source: phl17.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Minnesota)
 
 
 
Explosion in apartment building in Minneapolis. 50+ firefighters battling blaze in frigid temperatures. Pictures, video and live sky cam
source: minnesota.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when you move and forget which case you hid the bomb in?
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Going out to eat is slowly killing America, but only because restaurants make portions so large. So to recap, eating out is bad for us, but it isn't our fault we're not cooking at home, it's someone else's fault we order a double cheeseburger
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
"I think that bear was trying to kill me," claims woman who spoke out for the first time after she was savagely attacked by a black bear on December 2nd. Good to see the attack didn't eliminate her firm grasp of the obvious
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
You're an internationally renowned flautist from Canada who lovingly crafts your flutes by hand. U.S. Customs officials: These are made of wood, which makes them agricultural products and therefore must be destroyed
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
The 4th Amendment protects you from all unreasonable searches and seizures* (*Not valid in all 50 states, void where prohibited, check individual borders where applicable)
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Well, that didn't take long
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
UK social workers begin taking children from parents who are overfeeding them, say that any child who is getting obese on a diet of British food is definitely a victim of torture
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Connecticut)
 
 
 
New Hampshire considers legalizing an ounce of marijuana, still unsure how to divide that one ounce for the entire state
source: connecticut.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
I'm not saying aliens wanted to wish Salinas, California a Happy New Year, but ---
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Canadian Ice truck will keep your beer cold, hoser
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Straits Times)
 
 
 
Giant yellow duck explodes in Taiwan ... again (w/video)
source: straitstimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
The Pork Pie Hat: When you have to rob a bank AND look stylish for that New Year's Eve party
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Paste Magazine)
 
 
 
Ten essays condemning the internet available to read on the internet
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(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Theme: Photoshop your predictions for 2014
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
The most popular bar in Nebraska? Well, it serves sushi and "saketinis" and of course, since Omaha is the Hipster Capital of the Midwest, you've never heard of it
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
Man charged with criminal damage to property and aggravated assault after intentionally crashing into two cars and then slamming into the wall of a Fuddrucker's restaurant in Chicago. Though calling it a restaurant is truly a stretch
source: deerfield.patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Gun shop owner killed in shooting at store on New Year's Eve. If only he'd had a gu-... wait, what? A gun store and taxidermy shop out of a house? What is this, I don't even. I'm hung over and need a drink now. Happy new year
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
Weeners
 
What horrible things did we do to our penises last year?
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Best Korea would like to wish you all a factionalist filth free new year
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
He is... the most attractive man in the world. "Stay metallic, my friends"
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Survey shows state-funded "Swedish for Immigrants" course has 36 percent failure rate in terms of immigrants who can speak Swedish outside class. Expert blames Swedes for being too taciturn and shy to chat with language rookies
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Weather Channel)
 
 
 
WILL this first snowstorm of 2014 disrupt your travel plans? WILL you get drunk and forget where you put your pants? What is the weather like in YOUR neighborhood? All that and more here: THIS is your OFFICIAL Winter Storm Hercules discussion thread
source: weather.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Unexplained Mysteries)
 
 
 
Sure, you survived the Mayan apocalypse of 2012, but will you survive the Viking apocalypse of 2014?
source: unexplained-mysteries.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Boston)
 
 
 
Man on his way to the gym steals 250lb safe from restaurant in 6 minutes with 20 minutes to spare
source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Looks like the peach wasn't the only thing dropped in Atlanta at midnight
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Suspicious white powder causes evacuation of Uranus. Strangely, this is not a euphemism
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
What does your city or town drop at midnight for the new year? Happy New Year BTW
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Hottie who owns a 'baristas in bikinis' coffee shop forgets she isn't in high school anymore, calls a customer out on her weight and says the customer should 'save world hunger by shooting yourself'. Learns karma is a biatch
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 31, 2013
(KPTV Portland)
 
 
 
Definitely a non-dairy creamer
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
New Year's Eve Caturday Cafe (the ball dropping edition) is now open
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Woman, drawbridge team up in last-minute entry for 2013 "Most Horrifying Death" contest
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
We have a last-minute entry for the 2013 Mother of the Year award, and she has a strong showing in the 'Talent' portion of the competition
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Sinkhole in Hawaii goes all nomnomnom on a woman driver and her truck (w/pic)
source: usnews.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Your New Year's resolution for 2014
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Indianapolis couple has a car crash into their house for the 11th time. One more and they get a set of steak knives
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
If your six-year-old plays cops & robbers, draws pictures of ninjas or plays with imaginary friends, then according to zero tolerance in schools, he's a danger and must be dealt with
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
People who believe in god have thicker brains. No I did not say skulls, I said Brains
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
The top five vagina stories of 2013. Come for the vagina cakes and stay for the vaginal tightening cream. Vagina (Not safe for work)
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: re-brand junk food as health / diet food
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
Pope Francis ringing in the new year with a guilt trip, like a good Catholic
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
We may have found the worst neighborhood in America. Ariel Castro's neighbor pleads guilty for murder, raping daughters, and hundreds of other charges
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Arrrrrrh.. Mateys, a good pillage indeed of the electronics at the Best Buy. Now we can plot our new course using GPS. Arrrrrrh, on to where the rum is stored
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
The weirdest science news of 2013: Come for human head transplants and intentionally blowing up the sun, stay for "proving" gay marriage is wrong using magnets
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
What do the Brits do better than most other countries? Getting their heads stuck in the loo and having to be rescued from them
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
'It hasn't been confirmed whether he actually had a Bingo.'
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Need advice? Send us your design queries. Oh, and Fark your failure to hide the cord (url has Not safe for work language)
 
(RealClear)
 
 
 
Sunni members of Iraqi Parliament quit after the Shiite hits the fan
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
These days a premium parking space in West London sells for more than a castle in Scotland
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Millions)
 
 
 
Think you'll write the great American novel some day? Here are the unfortunate stats, Hemingnoway
source: themillions.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Obama is eating crackers like he owns the place again as Conservatives are complaining that he's being too tough on crime by being the least merciful President by only pardoning 13 people so far
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Pakistan appoints first female judge to sharia court, promptly orders her own stoning
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Monitor)
 
 
 
The Earth's crust was once deep dish instead of the thin crust it is now, somehow proving once and for all that New York pizza is the best ever. It's science
source: natmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
You are a 60 year old female. It's time to: A: Check your health benefits B: Look at retirement C: Give birth to twins
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Billionaire upset with the Pope's comments about capitalism says he may withhold donation, will instead spend the money on an attempt to get a camel through the eye of a needle
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Why Scotland is cooler than us: on New Years Eve we get Ryan Seacrest, a light-up ball in Time's Square, paper hats and noisemakers. They get Vikings with giant torches throwing huge flaming balls of pitch
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
If you are going to play cop, pulling over a real cop is not the way to start things off, son
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
In spite of the best efforts of the Duggars, population growth in the U.S. has slowed to the lowest rate in the past several decades
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
"We were not familiar with Mount Washington at all," says hiker, explaining why he was caught in an avalanche
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Man is gifted gun, accidentally shoots wife. Wife is gifted the trump card for every future disagreement the couple ever has. Ever
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Father of teenager who died of a K2 overdose says the synthetic drug is "worse than cocaine"
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
The weirdest New Years Eve celebrations from around the world. Your personal 'take a trip around the world by taking a voyage to the bottom of a bottle' not among them
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
And here it is, folks, the first head to roll over the Obamacare launch. Well, not "roll" exactly as much as "depart quietly in what was supposedly a planned retirement," but it'll have to do for now
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
2013 was the year of
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Musangwe: The bare-knuckle fist fighting game in South Africa that even lets the loser get a happy ending
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
NYC mayor-elect Bill de Blasio, proving he's got his finger on the pulse of the city, announces that one of his first initiatives will be to ban horse-drawn carriages. Up next: outlawing buggy whips, regulating monocles, new standards for inkwells
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
State Trooper seasons greets his girlfriend's teenager with a HOLY CRAP Is that a front porch?
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Armed men wearing hoodies rob a Family Dollar store, leading to three bad decisions in one headline
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Ever wonder what would happen if you invaded a home and the homeowner decided to fight back with fists, feet and a taser? Let's ask this young feller
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Massive explosion reported last night on Bronx pitchers' mound, is seen as a preview of the Yanks' 2014 bullpen without Rivera
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLBZ2 Bangor)
 
 
 
A Toutle, Washington teen was surprised by a small prick in his Christmas gift this year. So was his mom
source: wlbz2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Edvantage)
 
 
 
Parents&pupils,Welcom bk to Sch-2/1/14.Ensure prper grmng&atire-1st Day Sch.Barber prvd haircut $5/cut-ppl w unacptbl harstyl.Tp-tkg.ex-7/1/14,brng Tmtr.Thku
source: edvantage.com.sg   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Pickup basketball rules: Make one, take one. Nazi babymaking rules: Take one, make one
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
When people say you hit a one-in-a-million chance they're talking about A) the lottery; B) the chances of finding your perfect parter or C) getting savagely beaten to within an inch of your life by a ruminant
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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