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Sun December 08, 2013
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Move over, Knockout Game. There's a new, even more terrifying trend sweeping the youth of America: butt slapping
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canberra Times)
 
 
 
Protip. If you prepare a training scene of simulated gore and dismembered bodies, be sure to let the bus driver transporting your troops in on the deal
source: canberratimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Guy who cut off his arm and inspired the movie "127 Hours" is arrested for domestic violence. I'm wagering he used a right hook
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
Indian minister of secure email policy uses: a) a VPN, b) a new form of encryption, c) Hotmail
source: rt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Attorney argues that his client should get leniency for murder because: a) he's reformed, b) he's sorry, or c) his victim was a low-class prostitute?
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you're going to ask "Oh you're gonna shoot me?", be prepared for the answer to be yes. Especially if you're asking a cop
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Once upon a time, "Hipsters" were known as "Hep cats." Can you dig?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shorpy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lineup of toys and lad
source: shorpy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Iowa student learns that drinking the world's best pop does indeed pay off after winning a $20,000 Dr Pepper scholarship contest
source: blogs.desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Madison, Wisconsin may prohibit cuddling and hugging soon
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you drop your can of beer in the river, just let it go man, because it's gone
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Facebook considers adding a "sympathize" button. Still no word on the "unlike" button
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Web Pro News)
 
 
 
Nerf Rebelle: Is this new toy brilliant or sexist? Who cares, it's fun
source: webpronews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Lenin Down ...... Lenin Down
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
I'll stop jogging when deer fly
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
A man sufferers brain damage, is left in a coma and he is paralyzed from the injuries he sustained while participating in a contest. The dangerous contest? Eating doughnuts
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this underwater radiation source
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
I see you your Jesus in toast and raise you Grumpy Cat in an apple
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
We may have to start rethinking that "still no cure for cancer" thing
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Can you identify the most famous people in modern history? Or are you as stupid as the rest of us?
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The Federal Register, the government's official publisher, accepts material on floppy disks but not material on flash drives or SD cards. When asked about this at Congressional hearing, agency head said "And get off my lawn"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Six holiday shopping parking disasters you encounter every year ... as depicted by cute animal stock art
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Chestnuts roasting on an open fire. New Hotness: Parade float bursting into flames in the middle of the holiday parade
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Philadelphia police have way too much fun abusing citizens to simply give it up
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
We saw Blackfish on TV / Now our band you won't see / Protesting the world of the sea / Barracuda
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ImageShack)
 
 
 
Caption these two seated on the shore
source: img221.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Navy releases two animated videos on dangers of spice and bath salts. Watching them will convince you the people who create their PSAs are smoking some really good shiat
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Journal News)
 
 
 
Today's hot, hot teacher brought to you by Yonkers, NY
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
If you work for a religious organization that believes homosexuality is a mortal sin, maybe you shouldn't be too surprised if they have a problem with you getting married to your same-sex partner. Just sayin'
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Oinophobia is the fear of wine. Ohnoinophobia is the fear of ordering the wrong wine with your meal. Lucky for you, there's a handy chart to help you conquer this phobia that subby just made up
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Here are the 45 best Tumblrs of the year. Hey, it's Sunday...it's not like you were planning on doing anything productive anyway
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Patrick Drum was tired of seeing sex offenders hurt children. So he decided to kill them. Makes sense in a sociopathic kind of way, don't you think?
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Forget about your e-cigarette. Pocket hookahs are the cool thing these days. And take that onion off your belt, you look like an idiot
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Over the next 30 years killer storms ARE going to find you, and most likely you're going to die. Now would probably be a good time to start planning on how you're going to panic
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Waitress who was stiffed out of tip because of her "gay lifestyle" fired by the restaurant because of her "being a thief and a compulsive liar"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Local)
 
 
 
Passenger forgets to pay the "wake me up before you lock up the plane" fee. Why yes, it was United Airlines. How did you guess?
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
This entire misunderstanding could have been avoided if only he wouldn't have commented on his server's ugly shoes
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop this frog and his mighty steed
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Dolphins aren't special. I mean seriously, all they plan of leaving us with is an insincere "Thanks for all the fish"
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
For those keeping score at home, the "cell phone will/won't kill you" media fearmongering pendulum has swung back to the EVERYBODY PANIC WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE position
source: healthland.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Utterly Delusional Guy)
 
 
 
All the problems of the Internet have now been solved by decree of the King of the Internet. There, that was easy
source: internetkingamit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Somebody thinks the donation bin industry needs to be more heavily regulated
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
"Until Monday, Florida black bears were mostly a source of awe and amusement to their suburban neighbors." But now, there is a conflict, and Floridians are making plans to eliminate the threat
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTOO Juneau)
 
 
 
Live from Juneau, it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents, 2+ hours of music hosted live by a farker. LGT our website where you can find the stream, or look for KRNN on TuneIn.com/apps
source: ktoo.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Number of secular parents sending their children to religious school triples in the last few years
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat December 07, 2013
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Tons of exotic chicks totally want to crash on your couch and hook up with you for a couple of days, all you have to do is pay $25
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Famous Chicago Bar will see your SpaghettiOs outrage and raise you all-in
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Now the mother of a child can just give the kid up for adoption without any say so from the father, who was willing to raise the child himself without her
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
"The holidays are a stressful time and could have a negative impact on your health," claims CNBC health correspondent and graduate of the Ric Romero School of Journalism
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WNDU South Bend)
 
 
 
15yr old Sarah Crane, the youngest person in the country to have been fighting Stage 4 Colon Cancer, and whose purple #SarahStrong shirts could be seen with everyone from Cee Lo Green to U.S. troops serving in Afghanistan, has lost her battle
source: wndu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Brisbane Times)
 
 
 
It turns out that the Hills Have Eyes is a documentary: Australian children removed from compound after generations of incest
source: brisbanetimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Ten year-old boy suspended for playing with an imaginary bow and arrow, pretending he was his favorite superhero. No, not Green Arrow; Katniss from the Hunger Games. Rare main page Hunger Games trifecta now in play
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Hate on 'The Hunger Games' all you want but it's a big reason why the United States is going to have a kick-ass Olympic archery team in the near future
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Woman breaking into home has her burglary attempt aborted after stepping onto an antique scythe blade. Sometimes, you reap what you sow
source: blogs.desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this foggy scene
source: farm4.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Dozens of Iowans calling into special hotline to help police track down a loose moose. This is what happens when you have a slow news day in Iowa
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
You might just be as old as subby if the Christmas soundtrack of your youth is the grinding gear noise of the color wheel as it shone on your Aluminum tree
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"Some women do this, but on their vaginas". I'm just going to need a little time getting past this photo caption
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
♫♬Tell me, why should it be/you have the power to hypnotize me?/Let me live 'neath your spell/Do do that voodoo that you do so well♫♬
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ImageShack)
 
 
 
Let's make an official voting-enabled "InstaShop" thread that will live in infamy. Link goes to transparent version of the SpaghettiOriginal (HT: Phenn)
source: img18.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Portland Press Herald)
 
 
 
She is not a prostitute, What she does is meet men who have broken marriages or have no one in their lives, and she meets with them and has delightful conversation. Or stabs them 20 times. Stab, stab, stab
source: pressherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belleville News-Democrat)
 
 
 
East St. Louis businessman, who owns building right next door to the police department, demands to know who stole the entire back wall off of his business
source: bnd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Remember the NM officer who fired on a minivan full of kids? Well, his paid vacation just got longer. And unpaid
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
The Vincent's_Back(shadow) LA Fark Party, Saturday 12/7 (with updated info)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Woman never eats fruit, vegetables, fresh meat or fish, does not exercise, smokes up to 20 cigarettes a day, is still super healthy, totally hot and hittable (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Maybe you don't have a date tonight because you don't know how to kiss. Or maybe it's because you live in your parents' basement. If it's the former, here's a 1942 kissing manual
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South Coast Today)
 
 
 
Somebody in New Bedford, Mass. had an affair with a traffic sign salesman
source: southcoasttoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
It's Photoshop Wil Wheaton on tumblr. Farkers, get to it
source: photoshopwilwheaton.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(iAfrica)
 
 
 
Westboro Baptist ups their attention whoring, say that they're booking flights in order to protest at Nelson Mandela's funeral
source: news.iafrica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Jewish group in New York puts a $5000 bounty on participants of the Knockout Game. Shiksa's getting real
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Want to live longer? Have a beer instead of a coffee. Subby plans on being immortal
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Playboy turns 60 and is still as sexist as ever, though it can't quite reach the same peaks as it did back in the 70s
source: ideas.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KREM Spokane)
 
 
 
It's bad getting bumped off your flight to Hawaii; it's Fark bad when you're a Pearl Harbor survivor on your way to a reunion
source: krem.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Vodka and tequila, head to the back of the bar. The world's most popular alcoholic drink is a South Korean spirit called soju
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oxford Journals)
 
 
 
Once upon a time American cities were lonely places devoid of squirrels. Here's how the greatest country in the world fixed that problem
source: jah.oxfordjournals.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
The Federal Trade Commission, the agency put in place to protect consumers from unscrupulous businesses who take advantage of the uninformed masses will now take on its biggest challenge: The evil and dangerous Music Teacher
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
"A date that will live in infamy." Tag for the people on the island that day
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
"Valleygirl speak" infection spreading fast among men in California
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Iowa City Press-Citizen)
 
 
 
Mexican drug dealer who's already been deported four times gets a jail term, and the threat of... yup, being deported. It's like throwing Br'er Rabbit in the briar patch, I tell you
source: blogs.press-citizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If your kids are going to the Nichols Elementary School's don't-call-it-a-Christmas party, they better not wear red or green
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Not only have you been eating bananas, and apples wrong, now it's oranges too
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
A $1,000,000 blue plate special
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
The most obnoxious baby names of 2013: Ajax, Apollo, Blip, Blue, Cheese, Chevy, Daxx, Fairy, Feline, Holmes, Hurricane, Kazz, Harlowe, Kinzly, Kalliope, Kiwi, Kodiak, Nyx, Panda, Stetson, Tulip, Ziggo, and Zion
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Channel 3000 Madison)
 
 
 
Man attacked with golf club in church. Nearer my God to tee
source: channel3000.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
The surprising health benefits of ginger. This thread has so much potential
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Uh oh, SpaghettiOs
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Are there cheeses worse than 'human cheese'? Someone took the time to answer that question seriously, with horrifying results
source: news.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
After looking at weather patterns, scholars determine that Mordor is in Texas. Rick Perry heard chanting "One ring to rule them all, one ring to find them, one ring to..to...oops"
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these equine sculptures
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
"I was pulling into a gas station on the east side of Warden Ave., south of Highway 401 and glanced in the direction of a fast food chain restaurant next to it, with a parking lot bordered by a knee.jpg.size.medium3. promo.jpggh hedge"
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Man claims THC in his blood is from 'accidentally' eating spiked cake. BRILLIANT
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 40 New Jersey)
 
 
 
House explodes, humans critically injured, cats feared dead. One month later, humans recovering - as are both cats - who are receiving 24/7 vet care for free as long as needed. Welcome to a very dusty Caturday (tissues not included)
source: nbc40.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
One thing's for certain: Your company's holiday parties were a lot more fun before Facebook was invented
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Judge orders baker to bake a gay cake as fast as he can
source: usnews.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Time magazine releases its 3 best and 3 worst states for drinking. Show me the booze on your left and show us your outrage to the right
source: business.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
City rules that a 3 year-old autistic boy's therapy chickens are a public nuisance and cannot be kept within city limits, so his parents must move or get rid of the chickens. Because that's going to make everything better
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
The FBI has the ability to secretly activate a computer's camera without triggering the light that lets users know it is recording
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
North Korea deports US tourist and Korean war vet (obviously with big brass balls) after he 'apologized' for his alleged crimes against the North during the Korean War
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Good news, guys: if your penis look like ) or (, now there's a drug to help it look like |
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
World famous Brennan's restaurant in NOLA forced into bankruptcy, thanks to two feuding brothers and a sneaky cousin
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 06, 2013
(Burlington Free Press)
 
 
 
Authorities in Vermont go undercover to stop A) Drug ring B) Human trafficking C) Black market craft beer
source: burlingtonfreepress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
First gay marriage in Australia. God expected to send floods, drought and massive fires, just like every other summer
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
NYPD shoot at unarmed man, hit bystanders, charge man with making them shoot. The Aristocrats
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Not news: Man follows delivery trucks around town and steals packages from front porches. Fark: Is turned in by his daughter after seeing his picture from a surveillance camera posted on facebook
source: muskogeenow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Photoshop your own weather forecast
source: pbs.twimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Old and Busted: Creepy guys taking pictures of drunk girls at clubs. New Hotness: Creepy doctors taking pictures of drunk girls in the Emergency Room
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Ten foods that really REALLY should not be sold in cans
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HelenaIR.com)
 
 
 
Montana was colder than the South Pole yesterday, pipes froze and burst at the state Capitol, schools declined to close, the U of M hosts some poor bastard football team from the Carolinas tomorrow--and it's not even cold yet
source: helenair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DNA Info)
 
 
 
In NY hipster circles, the best kind of tattoo is the free tattoo you get at a hipster party. "I philosophically like the idea of being able to give a tattoo for free...It's a refreshing moment in a capitalist world"
source: dnainfo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
The cobalt-60 hijackers admitted to hospital, give it glowing reviews
source: rt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The American Prospect)
 
 
 
"I was raised hearing that you'd be allowing demonic influences into your house if you watched Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles"
source: prospect.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Which is better? White Christmas lights, or colored ones. Blinking or lit solid?
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Revealed: the US new super-spy plane hiding in this secret Area 51 hangar (probably powered by alien brains)
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"People don't actually like creativity." No, that's just Hollywood
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Photoshop these ghillie guys
source: 24.media.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Twenty things the poor do every day. Damn bunch of greasy freeloaders
source: benirwin.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Elephant on the loose in Rome, this is not a repeat from 229 BCE
source: in.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(610 WIOD)
 
 
 
Doctors warn women to wean themselves gradually from: (a) meth (b) cigarettes (c) high heels
source: wiod.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Today)
 
 
 
Woman becomes so obsessed with a spice she is smoking it instead of tobacco, planning for the coming of the Kwisatz Haderach
source: today.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Please clear your desks, it's time for the Fark Weird News Quiz. Now with electrolytes
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
McDonald's issues friendly list of tipping guidelines for its restaurant employees reminding them to not forget their nannies, butlers, and other domestic servants during the holiday season
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Everyone you've ever met is going to get addicted to Adderall and nothing will ever be okay ever again
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Four insane ways people are spending money on the Xbox One. Buying one suspiciously absent
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Over the decades people have wondered if Native Americans, aliens, earthquakes or floods created the 8-foot tall, 30-foot wide Mima mounds that cover Washington's prairie land. Turns out, it was just gophers
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Don't use a single outlet to plug in your space heater, your Christmas lights, your electrical dancing Santa, your aquarium pump, your blow dryer, your paper shredder, your alarm clock, and your iPad charger
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fusion)
 
 
 
It turns out the guerrillas who have been financed by drug money actually have some pretty good ideas on how to deal with the problem of narcotics
source: fusion.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Local)
 
 
 
Merry Christmas, loyal Xerox employees. We called the cops. You're all fired
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Standard)
 
 
 
Russian oligarch who opposed Putin to get charged again when his first jail term is up
source: business-standard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
When someone threatens to "dislocate your vagina" you know they're pissed
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
Today's random Jesus sighting comes to you from a block of wood
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Australian academics are promoting 'self pleasuring' as a way to reduce a host of illnesses.Subette has been 'tenting' for years
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Child accidentally swallows six rare-earth magnets. And by "child," I mean "teenager who will be driving on the same roads as you in slightly more than a year"
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Føødê Fïtê
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Amazon didn't think their drone delivery service through; birds are going to relentlessly attack them
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
And turning to health news, CNN asks: "Does smoking pot cause man boobs?". Probably not, but consuming 5 bags of Doritos after smoking might. This story brought to you by the new 420Bro, because you need all the support you can get
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Adelaide Now)
 
 
 
Friday 6 December is work in the nude day. Oh God please don't let this happen at Walmart
source: adelaidenow.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
If you are going to steal pallets from a former employer, don't steal his forklift. And if you steal a forklift, don't try to drive it down an off-road path
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Officials and residents of Cedar Lake, Indiana are joining forces so they can buy back the house taken from a blind woman over a property dispute
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
It's pretty cool building a life-sized gingerbread house using brown sugar, flour, molasses, eggs, butter, and 22,304 pieces of candy. Until the bees show up
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Mob of topless Argentinian women storms cathedral
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Your friend's working. Do you: Call in a bomb threat to get her out of work?
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Cute woman suffers from rare disorder that makes objects appear to grow and shrink around her - the so-called Alice In Wonderland Syndrome. There is, as yet, no proven effective treatment, but subby has an suggestion: EAT ME
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Register Star)
 
 
 
Mom arrested after using 11-year-old daughter to burglarize home via the doggy door, is ineligible for mother-of-the-year status because no 11-year-old is going to fit through a doggy door these days unless they're eating right
source: registerstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Even though it's winter you can still eat locally, as long as you don't mind a diet of turnips, rutabagas, turnips, potatoes and turnips
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Detroit's WDIV pays tribute to the late, great statesman, Alex Rodriguez
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
KY man fills brother's wish with big tip. That big tip must explain why he's a KY man
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Some say that rich people are rich because they're just smarter than poor people. Today we can officially put that theory to rest
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier Mail)
 
 
 
Thief who swallowed diamonds is refused bail until he relieves himself of all the evidence
source: couriermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Once again we celebrate the Christmas season - with its lights, its carols, its nativity scenes, and... HOLY CRAP, SOMEONE STOLE JESUS AND MARY AGAIN
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCBY Coos Bay)
 
 
 
Man crashes car, runs into trailer park, climbs power pole, gets shocked, falls, and is subsequently airlifted to hospital. The Aristocrats
source: kcby.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(610 WIOD)
 
 
 
People outraged over NYC Police new "Stop and Kiss" policy, likely because of unfamiliarity with the scent of Onion
source: wiod.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Times of India)
 
 
 
China tells British Prime Minister to return treasures that England looted in the 19th Century. In related news, the U.S. tells China to return the jobs it looted in the late 20th Century
source: economictimes.indiatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Mexico plans how to safely box up recovered cobalt. I haven't seen such a fuss over a cobalt box since Avatar rule 34 pics first appeared
source: worldnews.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Fun things making a comeback from the 50's: Ray-Bans, fedoras, 45's, measles
source: thesent.nl   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Woman says she was zip tied and robbed inside her home at gunpoint. Subby usually has to pay extra for that
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If your lady has been gaining weight ever since she's been with you it's only because she's in love with you
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bournemouth Echo)
 
 
 
Stolen arm found in second hand shop
source: bournemouthecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Western Gazette (UK))
 
 
 
'Sorry officer, a snail ate my tax disc' - the extraordinary way Yeovil garage avoided a £100 fine (police recommend salt interrogation)
source: westerngazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WYMT Hazard)
 
 
 
Trying to sell your newborn to pay your legal expenses due to drugs is not a good idea
source: wkyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
Couple plans their wedding ceremony to include visits by ninjas, knights, and superheroes before going off to honeymoon in the basement of the groom's mother
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Remember when it was OK to eat raw ground beef mixed with a raw egg served on rye bread without getting sick? Good times. Good times
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Soshiok)
 
 
 
Leave it to the Japanese to invent a water park where you can swim and play with the dolphins before eating them
source: soshiok.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Drive a tank? Sure, how tough could that be?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stock.xchng)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pen-and-ink sketch
source: sxc.hu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Caption this owl peeking out of the snow
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Protip: Don't sell your car on Craigslist and then report it stolen so you can claim the insurance money
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
The rare trifecta, where the tag applies to the guy in the article, the staff, and the crowd
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Engagement ring for sale, only one owner: Satan herself
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KERO 23 Bakersfield)
 
 
 
"The woman said the man has his penis out of his pants and was 'swinging it about in a rotary helicopter motion'"
source: turnto23.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
You can blame your work ethic on your parents, regardless of whether you're a workaholic or a lazy ass slacker with no career prospects
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
America's "meat addiction" is having an adverse effect on the planet, increasing carbon emissions and irritating self-righteous vegans
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
 
 
You don't want to go to church with me? Here, maybe this pillow over your face will make you change your mind
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
My hovercraft is full of deers
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Cool: Using a zipline to cross a river. Russian: Using a zipline to get your car across a river
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Male deputy high school principal arrested for taking three female students to motel room, proceeding to get them drunk and.... then getting them to spray paint obscene graffiti on rival teacher's house
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Flea market to pay Coach purses $5.5 million after they admitted to selling knockoffs. That must be one hell of a profitable flea market
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu December 05, 2013
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
How many options do students get to describe their gender these days? If you said seven, step up and claim your prize
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
It's going to be quite some time before these new parents will be able to tell their very rare set of naturally conceived identical triplets apart
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKYC Cleveland)
 
 
 
Steal from a coffee shop tip jar? That's a... that's a food drive for the obviously desperate thief. Hero tag is for the coffee shop employees
source: wkyc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(610 WIOD)
 
 
 
Not News: Drug suspect fleeing police. News: on bicycle. FARK: apprehended when he crashes into parked cop car
source: wiod.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
If you wanted to be sure that Canadians love poutine, McDonald's just confirmed it
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Woman takes Burger Joint to a whole new and more accurate meaning
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
Pastor receives complaints after posting his annual holiday sign. Apparently, the subtle humor of "Christmas is easier to spell than Hanukkah" was lost on some people
source: palmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this patriotic parade participant
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
In an effort to curb drunk driving, pub offers customers a place to camp out until they sober up. Whoa, that's IN TENTS
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Parents to Police: "Help us find our 15 year old daughter" Police to Parents: "Uh, I found her. In my apartment"
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
That's no moon...wait, it's still the moon
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Man who stole $360,000 of printer ink might lose part of his pension, although he'd rather return the pint of ink
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Old and busted: faces of meth. New hotness: haircuts of meth
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Times of India)
 
 
 
Sure everyone loves this new Pope and his followings of the teaching of Christ versus religious dogma. But I won't be convinced until he does something about sex abuse in the church. Wait...he did what?
source: timesofindia.indiatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
← Free Nelson Mandela
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
NewsFlash
 
Al Sharpton's polar opposite dead at age 95
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(About.com)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Yes, yes, Thanksgiving is awesome, but stuffing things isn't just for the birds. How about stuffed salmon or pork loin? Come on, don't hold out. Show us and make us salivate for the good STUFF
source: southernfood.about.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
New report explains deaths of 19 firefighters in Arizona blaze this June as result of massive screw-ups. Which is better than an earlier report which basically said everything was fine
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Totally appropriate things to buy your (former) loved ones this holiday season
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Kentucky town is hoping for a "Christmas miracle." Why yes, this involves Henry Earl appearing before a judge
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
TLC, formerly known as "The Learning Channel," now bestows upon us such thought-provoking programming as 'Sex Sent Me to the ER'
source: thesent.nl   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop a head for this poor dolly
source: grampyshouse.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Bishops give their blessing to armed vigilante group bent on destroying the Knights Templar. No this isn't a repeat from 14th century France, it just seems like it
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
What should be a big story about a Wall St. finance firm betting on a Spanish gambling company to miss a loan payment - and then bribing them to do it - is left for The Daily Show to cover
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lafayette Journal & Courier)
 
 
 
Tempting fate: naming your pit bull 'Chewy'
source: jconline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
All you men who think you're being fashionable by not buttoning the bottom button of your suit jacket? Yeah, you're basically just blindly aping some long-dead fat king
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
If a tree falls in a park, do you hear a sound if a poor sap gets crushed while riding his mobility scooter?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Principal of a middle school in Texas under fire for issuing an order banning the speaking of Spanish by teachers or student in her middle school, because there's NO WAY fluency in Spanish could come in handy in south Texas
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Well, in his parents' defense it's fairly obvious why they wouldn't let him near the cat
source: blog.sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Turns out jogging is bad for your health. If you are an American jogging in Libya
source: worldnews.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Feeling a little overwhelmed this holiday season? It's 'Christmas Tinner' to the rescue, the 9 course Christmas dinner in a can. A special meal for that special day, one that your family will never forget
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Bieber's selfie app fails miserably and all is right with the world again
source: valleywag.gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
The former Marine waitress who was "stiffed" for being a lesbian was dishonorably discharged, never served in Afghanistan, lied about having cancer and being a Sandy victim, hasn't given a dime to Wounded Warrior Project, kidnapped the Lindbergh baby
source: bridgewater.patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
If you burn down your apartment cooking meth, don't try and tell the cops you were just frying up some chicken wings. Or you can be like these halfwits. Your call, really
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not shout I'm telling you why: Krampus the Yule Lord is coming to chase you through the darkened streets of Austria and beat you with sticks
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
My daughter wants to bring her boyfriend to Christmas dinner. Which would be fine if she didn't bring her husband, too
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Baltimore)
 
 
 
Holidays make people even worse drivers than before YOU JACKASS
source: baltimore.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Trend of "smart" clothing continues, human beings soon to be more stupid than anything they wear
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Toronto Mayor Rob Ford, apparently looking for a follow-up gig as a gameshow host, offers five thousand dollars... and a NEW CAR for the crack video that he told us didn't exist
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Last week Costco labeled the Bible as fiction, this week they put the Ron Burgundy memoir in non-fiction
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Turns out there are legal consequences for riding an emu to work
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
What kind of apocalyptic Hollywood-style climate disaster would you like to see in your lifetime? No, Subby's glass is not half empty
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Because riding a bicycle down a steep mountain road after it just rained isn't crazy enough, here's a guy doing it backwards
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Residents of British city baffled by appearance of massive, glowing squid in their harbour (pics)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Owing to a lawsuit in federal court, the next state to allow same-sex marriage may be Utah. All 4 gay.. Utahans? Utahites? Utahns? fark it,... residents of Utah, said to be ecstatic
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Researchers determine that sexual activity counts as moderate exercise, which assumes you're doing either
source: well.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DCist)
 
 
 
Two litters of ugly-ass cheetah cubs born at the National Zoo
source: dcist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
"There's something that says 'you've made it' when a weird replica of your craft beer is pouring through counterfeit taps somewhere in the world's biggest country"
source: scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
The most awesome 11 before-and-after disaster pictures on Google Earth
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
♫ The leg bone's connected to the... genome ♫
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Does your teen have trouble falling asleep? It could be something hormonal. Of course, it could also just be that you're a horrible, horrible parent
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
It looks like Katie Couric is the latest addition to the anti-vaxxer idiot brigade
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLWT)
 
 
 
Sovereign citizen squatter who has quit-claimed 10 homes responds to indictment papers. About as nutty as you'd expect
source: wlwt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Twelve things that Ireland is the best in the world at. Soccer not one of them
source: uk.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Pat Robertson says "God I love trannies...uh, no homo"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
"Holt and his friends were dry-firing the gun at each other for fun earlier in the day." Hmmm, I wonder how this story ends
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
ABC rejects Barbara Walters pick of Edward Snowden as year's most fascinating person. Miley and Kanye still candidates, no word on Honey Boo Boo
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical Xpress)
 
 
 
Study finds that listeners can distinguish voices of tall versus short people, especially when one says "Seacrest out"
source: medicalxpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Chinese seniors driving thousands tiny, unlicensed and illegal electric cars while daring the cops to stop them. "If the police want to confiscate my car, I'll tell them to take my wife too"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Wildlife officials catch black bear cub but don't believe it was the same bear who attacked a woman earlier this week. So add "multiple bears" to the list of reasons to never visit or retire to Florida
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The NSA admits to tracking your cellphone location when you are abroad. They probably do the same when you are a guy, as well
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
More and more wealthy investors are realizing that with changing legislation, someone's going to be the Anheuser-Busch of marijuana. This bud's for you
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
The world's sexiest climate change scientists heat things up in a new calendar
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this artistic tree
source: apteka2005.narod.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Two million Facebook, Gmail and Twitter passwords stolen in massive hack. Good thing I keep my Fark handle behind seven proxies
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Scientist)
 
 
 
Sewer and subway heat can make our homes nice and cozy, smell like shiat
source: newscientist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wisconsin Gazette)
 
 
 
PolitiFact voting is underway for the year's biggest lie, and most finalists have to do with Obamacare
source: wisconsingazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Rockefeller Center Christmas tree lights up, gets the munchies
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Freight train carrying noxious flammable material derails, adds freshness to the air in Carteret, New Jersey
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
This PSA is for the guys in Mexico who stole a truck, found it was full of nothing but worthless pellets and abandoned it: That was Cobalt-60 and you've got three days to live
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(West Chester Daily Local)
 
 
 
Yahoo says its most popular 2013 search was "Miley Cyrus." The second most popular search was "Who still uses Yahoo?"
source: dailylocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Holiday traditions to look forward to: spending time with people you love, getting cool gifts, death watch for the town Christmas goat when vandals set it on fire
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Engineer on the derailed New York train was "consciously asleep" at the time of the accident, now hopes to soon be retrained for something for which he is more qualified, like Air Traffic Controller
source: healthland.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
You can cut down on AM radio inference by listening to the online stream instead. The fark?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
NYPD officer charged with extortion. If there were only some earlier warning signs, like him being a convicted burglar, stabbing a groom-to-be at wedding, and having a mass-murderer for a brother
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Man kills his family. Time to talk common sense crossbow control, and might as well add halberds and franciscas to the list, for the sake of the children
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Just because you've been married to him for 45 years doesn't mean you don't get irritated with him sometimes. Or slip him some antifreeze in his drink
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Men, do you feel weird about going into Victoria's Secret? Well, rest assured, the employees have noticed. They're trained to wring money out of uncomfortable guys
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Company sends Amazon a cake to mark the third anniversary of unpaid invoice 144. "Sounds like a case of... *removes sunglasses* ...GROSS incompetence. YEEAAAHHH"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Ask not for whom your wife live-tweets a car crash. She live-tweets for thee
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Good news for all you Chik Fil A lovers. The chain has announced its plans to remove butane, artificial dyes and GMO HFCS by 2014. Still not open on Sundays. Praise the Lard
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
If you're going to be pulled over while "super drunk," may as well have your Canadian Mist bottle open and close at hand, too
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
School lunch hours are actually fifteen minutes long, but it's not like kids these days wear watches
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 448: "Bridges III: Bridge Over Troubled Waters". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed December 04, 2013
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
God Lay Ye Merry Gentlemen (& women). One-third of Brits have sex with a colleague after the Christmas party
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Tomorrow will be 80 years since the repeal of prohibition. I'll drink to that
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
China's takeover of the United States enters the next phase
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
LAST POST *598*, because round numbers are for lazy people
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Norwegian Embassy gifts 700 ornaments to decorate Washington Christmas tree, and they're a scream
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
"I beat sinus problems by snorting baby shampoo." At least there were no more tears
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Topless Kansas City woman chases peeping tom through store, so everyone can get a good look
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(96.5 The Fox)
 
 
 
If you're looking for a hiding place for your glass meth pipe, your vagina may not be the best choice
source: 965thefox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Quiet title squatter now squats in jail
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Woman who used library cards for 24 fake kids to steal items claims "I didn't look at it as stealing, I looked at it as borrowing. I thought I could pay them back on my taxes"
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stock.xchng)
 
 
 
Photoshop something interesting happening in front of this wall
source: sxc.hu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Places you probably shouldn't shoot up heroin. Schools, the mall. Florida: The police station bathroom
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Upworthy)
 
 
 
Ex-police captain deftly dismantles virtually every argument against legalizing drugs
source: upworthy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
What color is your pee? Mind you Subby doesn't want to know personally, it's for your health
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Tiny West Highland Terrier somehow mates with female Rottweiler twice his size
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 14 Carolina)
 
 
 
Cops find weapons stockpile, arrest man who planned to ambush firefighters from his booby-trapped home before suicide-by-cop: "He used to say very weird things. But he was also nice"
source: charlotte.news14.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"I'm sorry. I'm afraid I can't let you eat that." - SAL 9000
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Two cheetahs from the Houston Zoo are given a chance to show their speed at the Dynamo practice field. Houston Texans look to sign them up
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cleanup of Scrooge McDuck's house
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phoenix New Times)
 
 
 
Man with serious dislike of circumcision may have worst custom license plate ever
source: blogs.phoenixnewtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ThePostGame)
 
 
 
Here's a handy Holiday Gift Guide for the outdoor enthusiast in your life, would also be great for that homeless guy you walk past every morning on your way to work
source: thepostgame.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Want to know how old your body really is based on mood, diet and exercise? Probably not, but here's a way to calculate it anyway. Oh yeah, you're probably a lot older than you think
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
White supremacist Clayton Bigsby spotted in Florida leading a protest against a monument honoring Union soldiers
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
How to bake the perfect cookie. Of course, there's science involved, but you'll be so distracted by the animated GIF, you won't care
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Tampa city council considering ordinance to roll back bar closing hours from 3 AM to midnight. For the love of Almighty God, WHY?
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWAY 3 Wilmington)
 
 
 
If you were arrested earlier in the evening, it might not be so smart to leave your release paperwork at the scene of the crime you committed later in the evening
source: wwaytv3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
2 unicorns for sale on Craigslist, serious inquiries only
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNS Fox 21)
 
 
 
Pilot of home-built 'Coyote' plane loses glasses in crash, calls authorities to complain he has no idea what state he crashed in
source: foxcarolina.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
What's worse: The woman who takes a selfie with a person about to commit suicide in the background, or the newspaper who takes a photo of a woman taking a selfie with a person about to commit suicide in the background?
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If you were on that US Airways Express flight in Phoenix over the weekend that had the TB scare, I've got some good news for you
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Royal Society of Chemistry)
 
 
 
Cheesy puns and Monty Python movie quotes don't make for a good article on dairy products....they make for a silly one, though
source: rsc.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Why your girlfriend's a slut. Hint: She can't help it, it's biology
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Think you have problems? Harvard is dealing with what appears to be an alarming proliferation of A grades, sparking accusations of grade inflation
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
What we did see: China's first lunar probe lifting off triumphantly into space. What we didn't see: Chinese authorities scrambling to evacuate 200,000 people in the rocket's flight path so they wouldn't get his by falling booster stages
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRQE News)
 
 
 
No, I can't make out the license number but, uh, it will be pulling a small church. So any blue Chevy pulling a small church, I figure that'd be the one. Yeah, uh huh
source: krqe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
French MPs approve bill fining anyone paying for sex. No word on what this means for marriages
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Defense attorney speechless when judge asks why his client shot a 7-year-old girl in the buttocks with a BB gun, twice. Because when you think about it, there really is no good answer to that question
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(KTVB Boise)
 
 
 
Student expelled for trying to get extra credit in home ec
source: ktvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
So if you know anyone who still believes that Penn State was unfairly punished for the actions of Jerry Sandusky, which it knew nothing about, here's a 4-page list of all the lies Penn State's president told the Grand Jury investigating Sandusky
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Connecticut)
 
 
 
Pilot whales' efforts to escape the sea thwarted by native land whales
source: nbcconnecticut.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Sriracha's response to the injunction against its factory to stop making the most delicious hot sauce known to man
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
The priest who let the old lady monkify Jesus was too busy to supervise her work. One guess what he was doing
source: thelocal.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
For first time, citizens of Colorado are now shooting themselves faster than they are dying in car wrecks
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New Republic)
 
 
 
The awesome thing about Bitcoin is you can watch bank heists live, in realtime. With paper money you have to wait for the movie
source: newrepublic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Obama when talking about the ACA "We're not repealing it as long as I'm president". GOP: Challenge accepted
source: nbcpolitics.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Canada: Send Us Your Tired, Your Poor, Your Pekingese
source: gma.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Hard-hitting reporting at its finest - brave journalist and his even-braver wife test out a pair of Shreddies (fart-filtering underwear) in a harrowing Dutch oven experiment
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Bad Sex in Fiction prize winner for 2013:"We streak like superheroes past suns and solar systems, we dive through shoals of quarks and atomic nuclei. In celebration of our breakthrough fourth star, statisticians the world over rejoice"
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Up North Live)
 
 
 
Stand your ground Maine style: Man assaults trespasser with chainsaw
source: upnorthlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Far more men are getting hit by cars than women, according to new DOT study. Which can only mean one of two things, men aren't very smart or more women are driving cars than men
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Indiana University removes black Santa display after white people report night terrors over the idea of a black man coming down their chimney at night
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
NORAD has decided to give Santa some air support this year. Naturally, some people have a problem with this
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WAFF Huntsville)
 
 
 
Your political campaign may be in trouble if the public thinks you're dead
source: waff.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
The man in the saddle is angular and long-legged. His skin is sun-dyed brown. The gun in his holster is gray steel and rainbow mother-of-pearl, its handle unmarked. People call them both "the Sikh Shooter"
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Apparently Noah's Ark restaurant does not have two burglar alarms or two security guards
source: blogs.desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Portland tells 11-year old girl trying to sell misletoe plants to help her dad pay for her braces that she is not allowed to sell them without the proper license. She is free however, to beg people for the money instead
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
What's worse: Shooting a friend during Monday Night Football or the cheesy "game over" line he uttered before pulling the trigger?
source: tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Snopes)
 
 
 
In case you wondered why a government agency tracks Santa on Christmas Eve
source: snopes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
WWII Japanese "mega-sub" that's been missing for 67 years has been discovered. It would have attacked the Panama canal had it not been defeated
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
NYC teacher with history of abusing students gets popped for throwing a special-needs kid down a flight of stairs; school officials say if he does this another couple dozen times he might just lose faculty-lounge coffee privileges
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
While you spend the day coding PERL or being a sandwich artist, these dudes in India are spending their day hunting a massive man-eating tiger. And they're so hardcore, they're not even carrying bullets for their guns
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
Although their cause is just, maybe these Bangladeshi workers have not thought their cunning work plan all the way through
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
We know it's early, but Britain has already named its 'Worst Christmas Tree of 2013" and this one could go the distance. Wow, that's just ... the worst (pics)
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(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Here's some terrifying helmet-cam footage of the mid-air plane crash that nine skydivers escaped. If you're already afraid of flying, you won't want to watch this
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Smoking hot embezzler needs $400K by Dec. 19. *Cancels Total Fark* *Empties bank account* *Buys engagement ring*
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Man imprisoned for 25 years for killing his wife exonerated. Focus shifts back to one-armed man
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Calgary Herald)
 
 
 
There is so much snow in Calgary right now that residents warn they are completely cut off from police and ambulances and fear cannabilism could break out any moment. Or something
source: calgaryherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda)
 
 
 
Cost of living in Russia: $8.30 for a cup of coffee
source: english.pravda.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Officials are shocked when man who stole $3,000 camera from friend dying in car accident doesn't show up for court
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCVB Boston)
 
 
 
"You're a drunk driving illegal alien who was supposed to be deported 20 years ago. How do you plead?" "My nephew is President, your honor." "Welcome to America, Mr. Obama"
source: wcvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Ghost hunters mistaken for burglars. Ruh-roh
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
Northern Ireland wants to change its image from a violence-wracked, sectarian hellhole to just a plain violence-wracked hellhole
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Two men in Armenia plan to break record for world's longest handshake, eclipsing the mark set by you and your fiancee's dad when you first met
source: armradio.am   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Network World)
 
 
 
Why Wikipedia no longer subjects us to wall-to-wall Wales
source: networkworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Is your husband/wife maxing your credit card again buying curtains and throw pillows? Thank the Neanderthals
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
'Vast majority" of old black and white movies have deteriorated beyond repair, leaving movie archivists blue. Although you can't really tell given the shape of the print
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Man slapped with $120 fine for looking at a painting left next to a dumpster
source: thelocal.es   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
More and more high schools are getting rid of class rankings, because it's "bad" for the esteem of students
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
10 Reasons why Paul Walker was killed by a drone strike. Thanks, Obama
source: beforeitsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Science)
 
 
 
Photoshop this guy getting cured
source: popsci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Not news: Windows market share grows. Fark: Windows 7
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Europe)
 
 
 
Italian justice system just got loopholed yet again, but this time is too funny to leave unnoticed. Long story short, Berlusconi considers running as a Bulgarian MEP, immunity granted Bam
source: neurope.eu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Optimistic lawyer looks on 'bright side' after teen arrested having sex with pregnant dog
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