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Sun September 15, 2013
(BBC)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready headline: "Herrings - good to eat, not to inhale"
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
"Screw the wedding ceremony, let's just go to the presents"
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Nostra Damas killed in traffic accident when church bus flipped. Saw that coming
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC2News Baltimore)
 
 
 
Toilet racers hit the streets, try not to wipe out
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Photoshop this colorful carousel
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The African nation of Chad has 12 million people and just one psychiatrist, who is so poor he can't afford A/C
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
No, 'Possum Infestation' is not SyFy's next epic masterpiece, but it should be, Mate
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Sodomy, condoms and porn - oh, my
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Oregon Republican would really appreciate it if everyone could send him their urine
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop these two traversing a tightrope toward a telecommunications tower
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
"Vanilla flavour, it has been established, is not only derived from the vanilla bean. It can also come from conifer trees, or indeed from the anal passage of a beaver"
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
At least six people are injured at Riot Fest. Authorities and promoters unsure if this makes Riot Fest a success or failure
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Salvage crews will undertake a daring attempt to raise the Concordia on Monday. Admiral Tolwyn hopes to complete operations before the Kilrathi can attack
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Divers ready to explore the blue hole. Time to take a breath and bear under
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hot Rod)
 
 
 
I'm not suffering at the level I like to suffer. We're gonna need a parts store
source: videos.hotrod.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MIT)
 
 
 
How smart do you have to be to get into MIT? Not as smart as you might think
source: tech.mit.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Field and Stream)
 
 
 
I love the sweet aroma of squirrel, and I'm surprised at most folks' inexperience with serving the little guys so here is Braised Squirrel With Bacon, Mushrooms, and Pinot Noir, it's a riff on coq au vin
source: fieldandstream.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Using only an oxygen mask, firefighters successfully treat a reptile dysfunction
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Good police work: Realizing a 24-year-old man is running toward you to ask for help after a car crash. Bad police work: Realizing this after you've tased him and shot him dead
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vineland Daily Journal)
 
 
 
Jeepers creepers
source: thedailyjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bust dust
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
NYPD officers shoot at "agitated man", fracture tibia and fibula and graze an ass. Fark: Not the agitated man's leg bones or ass
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
I caramba
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Mass hysteria
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Holy shiat
source: gma.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
World's second-oldest man moves to the front of the line
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Texas Giant rollercoaster re-opens after passenger's death. To prevent long lines, they have installed signs warning people with "unique body shapes or sizes" against riding
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat September 14, 2013
(NPR)
 
 
 
Selfiephobia (fear of taking a photograph of oneself) and Expiraphobia (fear of forgetting to renew a domain name). Surely Farkers come up with more new phobias that need catchy names
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
"Knowingly or not, millions of Americans have sprayed, squirted and rubbed Mr. Taylor's products onto themselves during their daily bathing routines"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Russia agree to framework on Syria chemical weapons. Our chief weapon is surprise...surprise and fear...fear and surprise.... Our two weapons are fear and surprise...and ruthless efficiency.... Our *three* weapons
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Prince William is quitting the RAF to work on saving endangered species. First project will focus on the increasingly rare Regius privilegus
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
A touching story of a mom who just happens to like touching 14-year-old boys and why she can't go to her daughter's high school graduation
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Remember that brain eating amoeba lives in ponds and lakes? Add your tap water to the list
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Pet cemeteries in New York will now accept human remains for burial and I'm coming for you, Rachel... And this time, I'll get you... Gage, and I, will get you. For letting us die
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this family photo
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Bored white lady from California becomes first bored white lady Maasai warrior, writes "Eat Pray Love"+"Dances with Wolves" mashup book tied together with brazen sportswear product placement about it
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Today)
 
 
 
Prison unveils plush mascot to improve its PR. "Katakkuri-chan, which has a male and a female incarnation and wears the uniform of a prison warden, made its debut at a recent weekend fair at Asahikawa prison"
source: japantoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yandex.ru)
 
 
 
Photoshop this annoyed runway model
source: img-fotki.yandex.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Study shows that fast learners are more likely to become Farkers
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Texas opens its first bookless library. Wait...what?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Indonesia threatens to deport Harrison Ford for "harassing state institutions," trying to collect all the Sankara stones
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Disney Land Paris: not the happiest place on earth
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WXYZ Detroit)
 
 
 
Tal Shiar searching for sexual predator after a 72-year-old woman was sexually assaulted in Romulus
source: wxyz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
...So I built a third boardwalk. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp. But the fourth one will stay up, and that's what you're going to get, lad. The strongest boardwalk in Jersey
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PBS)
 
 
 
Not news: Little boy demands his bedroom be modeled after bridge of Starship Enterprise. News: Little boy is actually Gen. Alexander, NSA head. Fark: Lawmakers, officials loved to sit in Captain's chair
source: pbs.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
Thoughtcrime was not a thing that could be concealed forever. You might dodge successfully for a while, even for years, but sooner or later they were bound to get you
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The UK's Labour party seeking to eliminate the Bedroom Tax, but its lips are sealed on the Backseat Tax, Kitchen Table Tariff, Hotel Levy, Hot Tub Charge, or Your Mum User's Fee
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
California school district hires firm to monitor middle & high school students' social media posts
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WISHTV)
 
 
 
High school freshman girl with Down Syndrome voted homecoming princess by rest of her school. Tag is for both Kimmy and the students who voted for her
source: wishtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Sound-proof room, Clorox, raw chicken, cannibalism DVDs, disposable scalpels, castration stretcher, freezer, cage with feeding hole, deluxe butcher set, child-sized coffin, poisonous partridge and an angry pear tree: The dungeon of 'Fat Longpig'
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Herald Online)
 
 
 
Hard to say which is worse: being shot in the groin after a dispute, or realizing that the dispute was over a moped
source: heraldonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS San Francisco)
 
 
 
San Francisco police eventually arrest man who climbed up a pole at an intersection while naked, after determining that his behavior was unusual, even by San Francisco standards
source: sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Plymouth Herald)
 
 
 
Egg and spoon race, tug of war and the 400m drug dealer pursuit. School sports days sure have changed
source: plymouthherald.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Soshiok)
 
 
 
Bakery only sells baked goods that are grey-colored and thematically tied to mental illness. Somebody needs to tell the baker to turn his frown upside-down cake
source: soshiok.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Editors at Arizona Highways magazine pull their October issue off shelves because there's an article about mushrooms people can eat that included a psychedelic one on the list
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Elderly Dick Cavett wonders if he might have been a happier and better person if he hadn't grown up in such a sexually-repressed time
source: opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
High, pantsless, and wearing prosthetic breasts is no way to go through three cars at 100mph, son
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courthouse News Service)
 
 
 
Iraq war veteran is an Infidel and proud of it. State of Michigan, not so much
source: courthousenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop these two on a 2-dimensional plane
source: media2.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WYFF 4 Greenville)
 
 
 
The reaction you're generally looking for with graffiti is not "What the fark?"
source: wyff4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Come stop by the Stray Cat Cafe or the Lost Dog Cafe - have a few drinks, enjoy a good meal, and don't forget to adopt a homeless shelter animal before you leave on your way to Caturday
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 19 Cincinnati)
 
 
 
How many times does a threesome go into two arrests for domestic violence? Show your work
source: fox19.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ever wonder what happens when you flush the toilet in mid-flight? This and other common myths about flying answered by pilot who wrote a book
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Miss Uzbekistan shows up in Indonesia to participate in Miss World contest. Problem is that there is no Miss Uzbekistan contest and nobody in Uzbekistan has any idea who she is. But, you'd still do her
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Dogs basically don't care if you are a robot or a human. Apparently, they don't have a steak in it
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Pro-tip: Don't advertise yourself as a stable hand with stud work experience if what you're really into involves having sex with horses and dogs - and filming it
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri September 13, 2013
(Discovery)
 
 
 
Cheating, for lack of a better word, is good
source: news.discovery.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Complete this headline: When the snakes in your neighborhood are big enough to kill a 60 lb Siberian Husky, it's time to................- (Article contains some graphic & disturbing images)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Who is the most evil fictional character ever written, whether in literature, film, or television?
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Coming soon to a gun store near you - A belt fed rifle that can "spray bullets like a fire hose" and it's perfectly legal. Yippie Ki-yay M@#$#@#ER
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
The full litany of complaints Americans filed to the FCC regarding Miley Cyrus's chilling, terrifying "twerking" performance at the VMAs
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
How do you expect American citizens to shop at the local farmers market without a rifle?
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shorpy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this 1960's Fleetwood
source: shorpy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dlisted)
 
 
 
Caption this biker Paparazzo that just knocked Nicole Kidman flat on her ass
source: i.dlisted.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kickstarter)
 
 
 
TFette's high fashion photographer friend has 4 hours left on his Kickstarter campaign for a truly inspired Metamorphosis project. Support the arts on the left, and cheer for the artistically bare nipple in the video to the right
source: kickstarter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
If it walks, talks and looks like a duck, it's a potato
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Google street view car hits bus, then flees the scene and hits another bus. And then a truck
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
News: A $68 Marc by Marc Jacobs T-shirt has been pulled for resembling Neo-Nazi something. Fark: A $68 Marc by Marc Jacobs T-shirt
source: shine.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Trying to save a buck on paying health care, Lake County IN told its older employees to quit their jobs and go on Medicare then -- wink wink -- you can come back to work part time. Surprise, suckers--now you're all fired
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Onion)
 
 
 
10 Reasons Falling For Shameless Click Bait Makes You A Bad Mother (warning: slideshow)
source: theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live5 News Charleston)
 
 
 
Hello? Yes, this is hero
source: live5news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Kos)
 
 
 
The Iowa pastor who raped young boys to stop them from being gay will not serve time. Not on this earth, anyway
source: dailykos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Nice story about a heroic rescue and... oh
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Photoshop this interview with a Dick
source: pbs.twimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Castanet)
 
 
 
Overheard on the police scanner: "Pipe Bong, bring Bong Squad"
source: castanet.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
The next fashion trend that we've all been waiting for is finally here: clear bras
source: drive.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Is this: A) another Fark link about naked people being arrested; B) a story about excessive alcohol consumption and a "poorly shorn" scrotum, or C) this week's Fark weird news quiz?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
Today's episode of "Pretend your child has cancer so you can rake in donations" is brought to you by Utica, Ohio
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Want to date a real woman, but worried that your piles of video games will be a turnoff to all but the most slovenly options? No worries, Padawan: Just create fake book covers for them, and let her think you're an intellectual reader
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Guns don't kill people... Well, actually they do
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic Wire)
 
 
 
The Guy who the book/movie "Into the Wild" was based on? Apparently he wasn't quite the clueless dumbass everyone assumed, and he probably died from eating a plant no one realized until recently was toxic and slowly paralyzed you
source: theatlanticwire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
"Stop calling it Xbone" says company that just registered Xbone.com
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Man attempting to cross the Atlantic attached to helium-filled balloons ends his trip after only 12 hours due to "technical issues," which may be just a fancy way of saying "he sobered up"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
A Delta flight from Germany to Detroit landed in Dublin because, well, wouldn't you?
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kare11)
 
 
 
Missing alligator found in Minnesota - with pic that confirms an alligator-owning Minnesotan looks exactly the way you'd expect
source: kare11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
CUNY protestors harass lecturer David Petraeus because of reasons
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
While the United States can't build prisons fast enough for the number of its citizens it locks up, the Netherlands has been forced to close 8 prisons because they don't have enough criminals to fill them
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
I deeply regret any distress that my mass killings may have caused you, or your family, and I hereby undertake not to repeat any such killings at any time in the future
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Detroit Tigers' hot dog vendor has lost his job after 15 years for speaking truth to power ..... You don't put ketchup on a damned hot dog
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Uniface mask: The creepy alternative to plastic surgery
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Food Nut)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: You like it hard, you like it soft. You like it with a tang, or nutty, on things, in things, or all by itself. Is there ever enough cheese? You know you like so many of them. So, tell us what they are and how you serve them up
source: cheesesociety.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STV.tv)
 
 
 
Caught speeding while rich? Just tell the judge you couldn't possibly use public transport as your mansion's too far from the station
source: news.stv.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Anthony Weiner spent $148 a vote to get less than 5 percent of the vote, says his campaign staff talked him out of his original money saving idea of just sending everyone in the city a text
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
YMCA lifeguard tells woman she can't breastfeed her baby poolside in front of everyone else. Looks like someone ignored the "No Food or Drink by the Pool" signs
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
...and sometimes a bad guy with a gun manages to take himself out
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Welcome to flight 666 to HEL on Friday 13th
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Public debate continues over new Rutger Hauer movie
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Herpes-infected monkeys terrorize Florida. Locals reportedly glad that at least they aren't New Yorkers
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
A look at the One Ring that rules NPR
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Artinfo)
 
 
 
Police believe that possibly, the man who broke into a museum and rearranged artwork in the storage area while naked and bleeding might have been just a teensy bit high
source: blogs.artinfo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MetroWest Daily News)
 
 
 
Police link man with lacerated feet to glass smashing burglary by connecting the bloody dots
source: metrowestdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Crash test dummies prefer electric vehicles. Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Good: The population in Best Korea's gulags has dropped. Bad: Because they got better at killing the prisoners
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Why people think Friday the 13th is unlucky. It can't be THAT unlucky...subby got this greenlight, right? So that's +1 in the positive column
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Horse therapy horrifically fails to work on convicted rapist
source: thelocal.ch   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
New poll, which someone paid for, finds that Wall Street is still unpopular with many Americans
source: firstread.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Welcome to Liberalville, USA, where vandalizing public road signs is perfectly OK as long as you agree with the message
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Fdaernch swijmekeper tog et payout aftrt pigs sqeaa but pigs oglyh get bughtcered
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsOK)
 
 
 
The American Medical Association has not approved the use of Skype for treating patients; however, leeches and blood letting are still considered cutting edge
source: newsok.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Oh, sure, New York drivers know a ferry has the right of way - this one just doesn't care
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
If you're going to use a pig brain in your music video, don't leave it lying around. Trouble will ensue
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Have an easy fast today for Yom Kippur, Jewish Farkers
source: en.m.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lacrosse Tribune)
 
 
 
Milwaukee to de-ice streets with cheese brine after a measure is passed by the Wheys and Means committee
source: lacrossetribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Syria: Good luck with your game of "Chemical Weapon Whack-a-Mole" you silly Westerners
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
They don't call it Fun World for nothing, folks
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Don't be shocked if you send pot to someone via USPS and the police show up at your door
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Man who punched a 62-year-old white guy after saying "I'm gonna punch the first white guy I see" denies race was a factor
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
2.2 million dehumidifiers recalled because fire is worse than humidity
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
The world's third biggest carbon dioxide emitter comes from: A) Cow farts B) Sulfate geysers C) Wasted food
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Louis Farrakhan thinks George Zimmerman is a "ticking time bomb" and "another Sandy Hook" waiting to happen. And by Louis Farrakhan I mean Lake Mary Police Chief Steve Bracknell
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Woman accused of selling food stamps on Facebook, which somehow still seems way less terrible than Candy Crush status updates
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
United accidentally sells tickets for $0. Don't worry, though, the people who managed to get them still had to pay fees
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Devastating storm brings 30-foot deep "surge of water, mud, rocks and debris" to Boulder, among other things. Stay safe, Colorado Farkers
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Big Picture)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mighty sailing man and his ferocious feline companion
source: bigpicture.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Much like a fine wine, hangovers improve with age
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
And the Ig Nobel prizes go to:
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Chinese CEO is tired of being breathlessly compared to Steve Jobs, just like American subby with Ron Jeremy
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Six really stupid 9/11 conspiracies
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
That's quite the spoonerism
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Panel rules that 13 Arkansas school districts can arm teachers and staff. Otherwise known in Arkansas as "business casual"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Looks like meat is back on the menu, boys
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
A Very Special Message from Ayman al-Zawahiri on this, the anniversary of 9-11 er 9-13
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Indy Channel)
 
 
 
"To the last, I will cuss at thee... from Hell's heart, I slap at thee. For hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thy dog." This is why you never hire a babysitter named "Khan"
source: theindychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
If you're planning to break a world record by navigating some kind of a watercraft across the Pacific Ocean, you better get to the beach now
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Las Vegas woman rolls a 5
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Armed McDonald's manager holds up his own restaurant. Robble robble
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Would you pay $75 to sit naked on an open-seated chair with a humidifier blasting herb-infused steam into your private parts?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Eighty six-year-old woman gets her first tattoo from her granddaughter -- but she'll probably regret it 20 or 30 years down the road
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Phoenix)
 
 
 
Arizona man accused of branding his initials on sleeping girlfriend's va-jay-jay area with a butane torch -- because she wouldn't go dancing with him
source: myfoxphoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Smoking hot 50-year-old woman is a published author, can speak multiple languages, is witty and clever but still single; claims men simply can't handle it if a woman outshines them (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Man trying to cross Atlantic Ocean with 370 balloons, just like the Disney movie "Up"
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
If you're meeting the "photographer" at a motel for a "modeling shoot", things will probably not end well
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
Kids more likely to be bullied at schools with anti-bullying programs
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu September 12, 2013
(CNN)
 
 
 
US Consulate in Herat Afghanistan attacked
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Apparently, building two houses on poles over your factory is just too unsafe for China
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Another good thing about Google Maps Street View - dog rescues
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Hot 97 DJ Mister Cee would like you to know that he is not gay, but every now and then, he "gets the urge to have fellatio with a transsexual - a man that looks like a woman." Again, he is not gay "because I haven't penetrated another man"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Minivan carrying clowns crashes. Dozens of casualties expected
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
It's the first day of school. You had ONE job
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Now there's an even better reason to take a towel to the beach
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Dolby achieves 100% breathing noise reduction
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this helium-filled superhero
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
High school named for KKK's 1st leader asked to change name. "This is a bad look for Florida.''
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
The Jersey Shore has a burning situation, and not the kind that a shot of penicillin can help
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(University Herald)
 
 
 
Looks like we're headed toward another McCarthy era. No, not that one
source: universityherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tulsa World)
 
 
 
Woman tells Animal Welfare that without her army of dogs, she'll only have her gun to protect her. DOG ARMY
source: tulsaworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Gorbachev comes out of the closet
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
"What? It's illegal to shoot at birds?", says the man on a motorcycle, in traffic, as he fires into the air
source: joliet.patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Disney is actively encouraging kids to bring their smartphones and tablets to the theaters so they can play games during the movies
source: games.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Carnival will now pay you to endure its next sewage backup
source: blogs.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mucked up man
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phoenix New Times)
 
 
 
Sorry about that whole bloody-diarrhea thing. How about a free burrito?
source: blogs.phoenixnewtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Some billionaires, such as Bill Gates and Warren Buffet, have pledged to give away the vast majority of their fortunes to charity. Then there are the Waltons, who inherited their billions and are going to fight to keep every last dime
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)
 
 
 
Lawyer for family suing zoo is "outraged" that the zoo would "attack" the poor grieving family by pointing out their son probably wouldn't have died if Mom hadn't lifted him over the safety railing and them dropped him into a wild dog exhbit
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
So just how bad are things when Mark Zuckerberg is calling out the US government on "blowing it" when it comes to messaging about personal privacy rights?
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Ferndale fraternity foot fetish freak found to be fake
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
So, it looks like British Pizza is a thing now
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Pumpkin is in the air, it's in your latte and on your porch. More importantly it's in your beer. Here are six of this season's best
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Wealthiest 1% earn 10 times more than average Canadian. Just 10 times? American CEOs laughing hysterically
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Facebook leads to human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, MASS HYSTERIA
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
School cancelled because recently waxed floors are too slippery
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
♫Who wears short shorts? Dad wears short shorts, if you dare wear short shorts Dad's gonna wear short shorts♫
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Independent)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby red pandas born in Dublin Zoo
source: independent.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Man jailed for sex with goat. I kid you not
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Man wearing Obama mask robs bank, but police arrive before he can even hope to change
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
PSA: Somalia is a dangerous place to be an American rapper, even if you're a rapping Jihadi who's pissed off al-Shabab's top leader. Well, probably more so in that case
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Olympic Games)
 
 
 
No, Mr. Hitler, you can't have a superior Aryan race. Not yours. And a very happy 100th birthday to the late great Jesse Owens
source: olympic.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
You don't often see the words 'Brain-eating amoeba survivor' in a headline
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
"Carrying anything unusual on board, ma'am?" *pregnant pause*
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
The great thing about recessions is that they make employees work harder
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Pootie-poot's NYT op-ed is the most eloquent biatchslap you'll read today
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Woman with crazy eyes posed as a producer for a Fox station and bilked businesses out of $3,500 each by claiming she could gain them exposure. She did; just not the kind they wanted
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Trayvon Martin medical examiner claims prosecutors intentionally refused to stand their ground
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ArkLaTex Homepage)
 
 
 
Woman discovers the many stages of drunk: 1) happy warm feeling, 2) everything is hilarious, 3) it's time to dance, 4) let's fight, 5) vomit time, 6) face down, and 7) time to go skinny dipping in the casino's public fountain
source: arklatexhomepage.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
 
 
 
Pittsburgh begins aggressively issuing parking tickets...to people who park in their own driveways. This "Pirates Winning Record" thing has everyone messed up
source: triblive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STV.tv)
 
 
 
The bad news is that more kids are swallowing washing machine detergent capsules. The good news is that kids are now cleaner on the inside, brighter and easier to iron
source: news.stv.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Relax)
 
 
 
Falcons, frogs, tortoises, parrots, dentures, underwear, glass eyes, and prosthetic legs are just some of the things that get left behind on planes every year
source: relax.com.sg   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Smoking hot 9/11 truther does a great job of explaining why it was an inside job. There are two lies in the previous sentence
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
The White House announces plans to destroy six tons of illegal ivory. Ebony inconsolable
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas Observer)
 
 
 
To avoid pot arrests, not kicking a cop in the balls (twice) is a good place to start
source: blogs.dallasobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Best Buy CEO's marriage ends up like most of the electronics he sells. Overpriced, broken, and making payments on it for years to come
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Inert rocket launcher found in landfill. Police confirm lack of ert, question Bruce Cockburn
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
60% of Americans are against military action in Syria. The other 40% think Syria is the woman they can ask questions to on their iPhone
source: firstread.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
When the Russians tell you your nuclear reactor is in a "nightmarish state" you shut up and listen. Got that, North Korea?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC4i)
 
 
 
Guy tells police that this is all a misunderstanding, that he simply locked himself out of his house after he went to go check on his mail. Without any clothes. Next to an elementary school
source: nbc4i.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RamblingBeachCat.com)
 
 
 
I scream, you scream, we all scream when an old man starts yelling profanities and runs towards the ice cream truck while brandishing a gun
source: ramblingbeachcat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Scalded woman wants government to regulate hot beverages, blueness of sky, wetness of (cooler) water
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gold Coast (Australia))
 
 
 
Serial hoon who thought it would be a lark to touch up his mate in Nerang gets blasted by magistrate. The only way this headline could be more Australian would be if it was drunk. And venomous
source: goldcoast.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
At least he was wearing a mask
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Boulder, Colorado. 25 square miles surrounded by reality. And apparently water
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Hot Scottish teacher moves in with her former student two months after being placed on the sex offender registry for having sex with him. That's right, I used "hot" and "Scottish" in the same sentence
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WUSA9)
 
 
 
Dong, where is my automobile?
source: wusa9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop these technicians on a TV tower
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Gallery of "Adrenaline-Pumping Photos from some of the world's biggest thrill-seekers". The photos are gorgeous. The thrill seeking is mostly heart stopping. You've been warned
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
The most awesome NASA photograph EVAR
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Need to know how to get an abortion in Texas? Here's a very serious interactive online game to help you out
source: america.aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
The greatest news for Kenya since Obama's birth
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Message in a bottle found after almost 107 years, possibly setting the record for the oldest message in a bottle. Sting nods in approval
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The latest thing people are doing wrong? Making salsa. Apparently, people don't automatically add the deliciousness that is cilantro
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Hawaiian woman told to trim her: A) hair. B) nails. C) name
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Woman accused of bilking more than $100,000 out of investors for her toilet fan scheme
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
The next threat to air travel? Ex-TSA workers
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Mother refused to let her five-year-old son see his father for a year because: A) he hit him, B) he let him watch porn, C) he might feed the boy meat
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
New York is being overrun by completely unregulated, illegal, underground, criminal dinner parties
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
There is a man wandering through California with three mules ....... and a website
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Helicopter mom shocked and frightened by the thought that, this year, her daughter's peers walk themselves home from school
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 436: "A River Runs Through It". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed September 11, 2013
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
New York polling inspector goes full Ron Burgundy. Surprisingly some people have a problem with this
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Stanford University posts online collection of over 700 maps (dating from the early 1700s) depicting California as an island
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Clark told police she dangled the infant off the balcony because she was "mad'' and was "making a point.'' She also said she can do what she wants with her baby
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
"Miss Kansas will show her tats during the bikini competition" is today's unfortunate non-typo
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Wonder how the Internet stayed up on 9/11? Thank this guy, whose algorithms made it much more efficient at massive data. Also, he single-handedly tried to stop the hijackers before Flight 11 hit the North Tower, thus became the very first 9/11 victim
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Tired of teachers banging students, this one ran down her ex's girlfriend just to mix things up
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Pastor arrested on undisclosed charges for planning to burn Qurans on 9/11
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baton Rouge Advocate)
 
 
 
Step 1: Create two cardboard jets, and attach them to the twin towers memorial in the public square. Step two: Throw in an effigy of President Bush holding a remote control, and a wad of cash. Step 3?
source: theadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
"The public is advised not to enter the ocean if they notice a brown color in the water"
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this ring toss
source: flakphoto.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rochester Post Bulletin)
 
 
 
Duluth restricts e-cigarettes, bans hookah bars
source: postbulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Study finds that wind farms are killing eagles, and that the Obama administration is not doing anything to stop it. Why does the President hate America?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Some Lemonhead driving a truck full of candy turned Buffalo rush-hour traffic into a Goo Goo Cluster-fark
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wisconsin State Journal)
 
 
 
New Wisconsin law would allow bar owners to sue their customers for drinking
source: host.madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
You think the AT&T Wireless 9/11 ad was bad? they ain't got nothing on Marriott: "In remembrance of those we lost on 9/11," a sign in the lobby read, "the hotel will provide complimentary coffee and mini muffins from 8:45 - 9:15 a.m"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Caption this conversation with a rhino
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The Pope gets a new, used Popemoblie
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Aviation Week)
 
 
 
In what will surely be seen as a routine, uncontroversial move, the UN signs contract for unmanned drone capability
source: aviationweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
Not News: Large Companies are laying off thousands of American workers. Fark: The same Companies then turn around and demand immigration reform for new labor
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KREM Spokane)
 
 
 
Man claims to be doing God's work. Was he: A) Feeding the poor B) Donating to charity C) Exposing himself to passing cars?
source: krem.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Corvallis Gazette-Times)
 
 
 
Man shoots his neighbor again. Different neighbor
source: gazettetimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Texas textbook review panelist: "'creation science' based on Biblical principles should be incorporated into every Biology book that is up for adoption"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
"I just came to see what hate looked like"
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Rep. Frank Wolf (R-VA) says that Obama, Clinton, and Kerry don't want to talk about Benghazi because they were hiding illegal weapons for Syrian Al-Qaeda rebels in the consulate. Really, he said this
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Big Picture)
 
 
 
Photoshop this propped up person
source: bigpicture.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
AT&T: Never Forget 9/11 or our new smartphone
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Tennessee forced to retry a man who admitted to killing his girlfriend because one of the jurors at his trial Friended an expert witness on Facebook during deliberations
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
It's not very nice to stick out your tongue at your victim after you were just spared jail for biting off his tongue
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
2011 WA Police: Is that residue from a marijuana cigarette on you? That's an arresting. 2013 WA Police: Is that a 2 pound joint you're trying to light? Let me help you
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily American)
 
 
 
Chicken manure spill is making things crappy for a neighborhood playground
source: dailyamerican.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Captain America in a turban for 9/11, and before you go all rage face, read the very cool story behind it
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Because today is the PERFECT day to simulate burning airplanes at Boston's airport
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
You're cool if the NSA shares all your information with Israel, right?
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
In a move totally unrelated to the Syrian crisis, Russia's carrier-killing flagship "Moskva" arrives in Mediterranean to have a look around, find wild animals for Putin to fight
source: rt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"Django is a very frisky black cat, he also has very sleepy eyes and appears to be stoned although I don't think he is"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
America is now a banana republic. Ooh, I like Banana Republic. But my friend Stacy says that it's the same stuff as Old Navy, just with higher prices
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
There's nothing quite like milk and cookies - unless you count MILK AND COOKIE DISEASE
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
I don't always make lasagna, but when I do, it's the BEST LASAGNA IN THE WORLD
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charlotte Observer)
 
 
 
If guns are outlawed, only outlaws will be able to accidentally shoot their friend with the gun their friend is trying to buy from them
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Benghazi. This is not a repeat
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Public bathroom soap might be poopier than the toilet you just flushed
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Fat, drunk and humping your Range Rover is no way to go through life, Dad
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
A Drone's-eye view of Burning Man 2013 (warning potentially Not safe for work ant-like people)
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Head-to-toe tattoos make clothing optional. With helpful pictures of people you wish would put on more clothes, maybe a burka or space suit or something
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Road construction crew member barely survives an encounter with rolling rock. Friends say he prefers craft beers
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Apparently on this solemn day, people with nothing better to do are upset Google didn't have an animated ""MURICA11" doodle and instead has just a small black ribbon
source: seroundtable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
A look at the four kinds of spousal embarrassment and how that douchebag you married inflicts them upon you
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
...and now let's all watch as Fox News hosts a serious discussion about whether the events currently taking place in Syria were correctly predicted in the Old Testament
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Concerned you may have a drinking problem? If one night's antics rack up pork burglary, criminal mischief and flag desecration charges, you just might
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
The hump this humpday: Four part-time jobs and the 1% is still taking home half of the nation's entire income
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Medieval fort to increase security after its battering ram is vandalized, plans to keep a dozen archers and two pots of boiling oil on standby
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(ABC News)
 
 
 
Suit alleges Home Depot is "Shoplifter trolling": Sending letters threatening to sue people they accuse of shoplifting unless they fork over hundreds of dollars to "settle" the claims-even though they've never sued anyone, ever, for shoplifting
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Investigators determine that the dead guy whose shotgun wound matches the hole in his wall didn't actually commit suicide. That's some mighty fine police work, Lou
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(CNN)
 
 
 
CNN going after the hard-hitting news of today: A brief history of cock washing (SFW)
source: eatocracy.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
NPR Yesterday: Colorado recall elections are a referendum on gun control. NPR Today: Crickets
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(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Vatican secretary of state says priestly celibacy is open to discussion. Quid agis, baby?
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(The Guardian Express)
 
 
 
Billy Joel marks 9 years since crashing into anything by joining NY politicians on 9/11 memorial motorcycle ride
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(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Firefighters rescue man stuck in chimney, "Stories range from 'hide and seek" to 'repairing the ceiling'. Nobody was able to get the straight story"
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(Slate)
 
 
 
Fourteen shocking reasons that you aren't dead yet, including fluoridation, which has never been a Communist plot to steal your precious bodily fluids
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(ABC News)
 
 
 
New poll says that being debt free is the new American Dream. Which is pretty much why it's called a "dream"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Humberto becomes the first hurricane of the season. Meanwhile, Joe Arpaio is getting ready to prevent it from illegally crossing into the US
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(PennLive)
 
 
 
Well this mugshot might suggest this man was possessed when he robbed his victims
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(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
Man turns green after eating too many river snails, envies those with better sense
source: yourhealth.asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
"Helzer bent over to pick up a card that fell out of his wallet. His pants fell down, and he shouted out to the trooper and a woman passing through the airport entrance: 'Hey, check out my crack, is it big enough for you?'"
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(WCVB Boston)
 
 
 
Some days you eat the bear, and some days you shoot the bear, stupidly follow it into the woods and have it maul the crap out of you
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(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop this centered rodent
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Fairfax County library system decides that maybe it doesn't want to become a Fark staple, after all
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Step 1) See lots of homeowners in your city with underwater mortgages. Step 2) Seize property by eminent domain Step 3) Refinance property back to homeowners at affordable rates. Step 4) Profit - handsomely
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(NBC News)
 
 
 
The first documented evidence of uninflated cop-math. I was as surprised as you guys
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Even world-famous novelists get swindled by psychics who promise to reconnect you with your dead son
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
One man's alleged attempt at teaching a co-worker a valuable life lesson is another man's alleged act of grand theft. Allegedly
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(WPTV)
 
 
 
Live video streams from 9/11 memorial ceremonies in New York City, the Pentagon and the White House
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Remembering 9/11. Let's share our stories of where we were when we heard the news
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(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
Apparently confessing to murder on Youtube isn't enough to get convicted easily
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(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Giant inflatable colon comes to New York City, because it's used to being near assholes
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(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Eleven food names you are pronouncing wrong. For instance, 'tart' is actually pronounced 'My-lee'
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
Police cruiser explodes into flame because of A) arsonist, B) errant bullet or C) grass clippings
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Not news: Man gored by elk. FARK: Man gored by dead elk he killed
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(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
George Harrison's music was used as torture device in Pinochet's Chile. Bloody sitar
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The latest person to undergo too much plastic surgery to look more like a fictional character brought to you by SUPERMAN
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Motor Authority)
 
 
 
What does a $500,000 truck look like? It looks like FARKING AWESOME, that's what (w/pics)
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(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Police warn of cow named Kevin wandering around near I-675. With pic of what an I-675 might look like
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(Gawker)
 
 
 
Anthony Weiner loses with less than 5% of the vote, his wife ditches him, he then gets chased through a McDonald's by Sydney Leathers, and he flips-off reporters as his car speeds away. That all just actually happened
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(C|Net)
 
 
 
Father of the Year candidate builds his son a pedal-powered X-34 Landspeeder. But it's not worth nearly as much since the XP-38s came out
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
An 'artificial egg' made from plants is set to revolutionize cooking, Egg McMuffins
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue September 10, 2013
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Mother says her 12 year-old daughter killed herself because students at Crystal Lake Middle School were bullying her and the administration did nothing to stop it. CH CH CH AH AH AH AH
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(Gawker)
 
 
 
And if you're a dick all your life, your obituary will look like this. Tag is for subject's children who now crusade against child abuse
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Saturday, Donny, is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That means that we don't work, we don't drive a car, we don't farking ride in a car, we don't handle money, we don't turn on the oven, and we sure as shiat don't farking sell heroin and oxycodone
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHIO-TV Dayton)
 
 
 
Dayton man has little remorse after fathering 27 kids. "One thing I would change is different moms"
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(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Ethiopian man claims he's 160 years old, doesn't look a day over 145
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(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
"The robber took cash, two glass pipes, a bottle of massage oil, a re-chargeable sex toy, a bondage chair and two laptop computers"
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(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: create a new cover for Rush Limbaugh's children's book (link goes to example)
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(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
I used this 1 weird trick to get a greenlight
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(Glendale News-Press)
 
 
 
Beatin' the bishop outside of church on the sabbath? That's an arrestin'
source: glendalenewspress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
In today's George Zimmerman thread we learn that he did have his gun on him when he confronted his wife and he smashed an iPad that had a video of the altercation
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(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
The husband, in the kitchen, with the chicken wings
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(Social Reader)
 
 
 
"Don't try to go drink for drink with a treeshrew, be wary of belligerent moose and pigs, and leave your keys with the elephant"
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(PennLive)
 
 
 
McDonald's now offers wings and McNuggets. Chicken may also be offered soon (critical review on the left, snarky reviews on the taste to the right)
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(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Siberian 'forest boy' found after 16 years living in the wilderness, asks if those stories he heard about your Mom are true
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(Smithsonian Magazine)
 
 
 
How do you tell the difference between whiskey and bourbon? Ask scientist TOM COLLINS
source: blogs.smithsonianmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Drunk guy finally released from jail. And the horse he rode in on
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fast Company)
 
 
 
"NASA plans to launch 6 romaine lettuce plants to the International Space Station"
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(Ultimate Classic Rock)
 
 
 
Neil Young's million-dollar car breaks down in Donner Pass, no word if he had anyone to eat with him
source: ultimateclassicrock.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Dirt)
 
 
 
The NSA has been running man in the middle attacks imitating Google's servers... codenames the operation Flying Pig, probably because they'll own up to it when pigs fly
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(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
Classmates remember boy struck by lightning as someone who always conducted himself well
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(Westword)
 
 
 
Talking urinal cakes are the latest weapon in Colorado's battle with drunk drivers, and not creepy at all
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(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pothole pool
source: cdn1.spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
One of our planes went down? Quick, send a bunch of guys with paint to black out our company logo so no one knows it's ours -- that always works
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(Vice)
 
 
 
Why your next vacation might be in Uruguay
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The Zeppelin makes a comeback. Because they worked out so well the last times
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
An unofficial guide to being a man from the men who are destroying America one 401k at a time
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(CNN)
 
 
 
Iraq's WMDs to move to Russia
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(Japan Today)
 
 
 
Area man visits supermarket, goes on tragic poking and squishing rampage with bare hands, "leaving 103 items destroyed beyond salability for a total of 59,880 yen in damages"
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(FarkItAll.tk)
 
 
 
Come participate in the Fark It All Halloween Swap. Trading candy and gifts with other Farkers - can you imagine a scarier Halloween?
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(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
When it comes to getting married, remember that 'taking the plunge' is just an expression and it does not mean you're supposed to push your new husband off a cliff
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(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Richard Dawkins wins yet another "You're Not Helping" Award
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(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Miracle mushroom diet raises questions about the hordes of hairy dancing midgets moving across the melting walls
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(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Your annual reminder to ignore the U.S. News & World Report college rankings
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Now that marijuana use is becoming more and more accepted, officials are seeing a sharp increase in its use by: A) Teenagers B) College students C) People over 50
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