Skip to content
Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
You might try our Headline Search for easier navigation here.

These links may be stale and generate errors. Can't do much about it. Tastes like chicken.
Sun September 01, 2013
(WWL)
 
 
 
Off-duty NOPD cop stays out drinking, drives his take-home department car to the suburbs, crashes into a 91 Geo Metro, both the cop and other driver arrested for DWI. The Aristocrats
source: wwl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Pennsylvania hospital now offering rehab for internet addicts. I CAN QUIT ANY TIME I WANT
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
"Oh yeah, see my wristband? This means I'm single and I want to mate"
source: newsfeed.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Libertarian Republic)
 
 
 
Remember the Texas dad who killed his daughter's molester? Guess who won't be charged with that death
source: thelibertarianrepublic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Precious snowflake gets shiathammered and runs onto the field of the Iowa-Northern Illinois game, gets arrested, blows .341 at the station. And since it's 2013, she tweets the whole thing
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Evangelicals believe the crisis in Syria could be a biblical prophecy in the making
source: swampland.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
The best car of the last 25 years isn't a Ferrari or an Aston Martin or even a Toyota; no, it's the Ford Focus
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Putin in a negligee (or some other whatnot)...your move, farkers
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
26 year old unemployed Illinois guy is youngest Publisher's Clearing House winner ever. Maybe because not many 26-year olds order "World War 2" magazine
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
No parking allowed for the next nine inches
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pair in a parking lot
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times Union)
 
 
 
If you surround your marijuana grow with traps try to remember where you put them
source: timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Tepco: Today's spike in radiation readings is nothing to worry about. We simply switched to a detector capable of measuring 10x as much radiation as our previous detectors. So, really, the radiation is probably no worse than yesterday. *facepalm*
source: articles.chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Frost Nixed
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Pastor preaching against vaccinations at megachurch, which is now the site of a measles outbreak: "So I'm going to tell you what the facts are and the facts are the facts but then we know the truth, that always overcomes facts"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
EU may require cars to read road signs and prevent drivers from exceeding speed limits. Suddenly spray painting a 3 into an 8 seems a lot more clever
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(France 24)
 
 
 
This is so like Francis: We schedule our prayer and fasting day, like, 3000 years in advance, then at the last minute he decides that he and his friends are going to have their prayer and fasting day the Saturday before ours
source: france24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ChinaSmack)
 
 
 
Hey everyone, let's all stand on top of this here dike in order to get an up-close view of the incoming tidal wave. What could possibly go wrong? w/pics and vid
source: chinasmack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
WW3 almost started 30 years ago to the day
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"Experts are unanimous......some sort of chemical attack, is real - but remain divided on whether it involved military-grade chemical weapons associated with Assad's arsenal, or were a more amateur concoction potentially linked to the rebels"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Photoshop this festival food stand
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
You know your Saturday was totally awesome when you wind up being tased, then taken to the hospital for "observation" and to get bits of car windshield removed from your buttocks
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DNA Info)
 
 
 
Woman offers her philatelic collection for hit man to stamp out her husband
source: dnainfo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
It's time to ban T-Shirt guns
source: espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
'Wanna get your boyfriend to pop the question?' Here's the answer: A number of women across the country have listed their positive pregnancy tests for sale on Craigslist
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Desecrating the American flag is a) a right guaranteed to American citizens, b) a time-honored Middle Eastern recreational activity, and/or c) an appropriate public school project geared toward reflection and exploration of feelings
source: radio.foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Man, things have changed. Twenty years ago, the lunch lady was giving the mystery meat to me
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Hot blonde has this rare form of OCD where she's imagining you naked and yet can keep her lunch down
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat August 31, 2013
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Dunkin' Donuts apologizes for 'bizarre and racist' Thai advertising poster, then awkwardly asks if you would like a chocolate doughnut
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sheboygan Press)
 
 
 
Tooth Fairy inflation pushes price of a tooth near $4. Thanks, Obama
source: sheboyganpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
You're supposed to put the lime in the coconut, not the coke in the lime, you nut
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun News Network)
 
 
 
Don't mess with Chinese women. Some of them will kill you and then boil your corpse in a pressure cooker
source: sunnewsnetwork.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
Video
 
Luckiest man alive miraculously survives landslide and the giant boulder that always crushes Wile E. Coyote
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop these silhouetted adventurers
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Cute student banned from school for dyeing her hair red, school calls it an "unnatural color" (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
That's a bummer
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
You thought your school was tough ? You got nothing on this one
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Police are mad that Eric Holder is relaxing the marijuana laws. This is going to hurt their bottom line. May lead to them having to deal with actual criminals
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Canadian destroyer collides with replenishment ship en-route to Hawaii. In other news, Canada has two warships. Err, had two warships
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Photoshop this odd couple
source: news.bbcimg.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun News Network)
 
 
 
Man found guilty of harassing entire local Amish community. Mafia set to retaliate
source: sunnewsnetwork.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
What does it take to get a toy bunny back in the hands of its toddler? A Facebook campaign
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
The complete guide to thirty years worth of American military strikes against other countries. Remember the good old days of Reagan and Bush, when we'd shoot first, ask questions later, and arm future enemies?
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun News Network)
 
 
 
Jesus had two dads and he turned out just fine. Spiffy: On a church billboard
source: sunnewsnetwork.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
South Korean woman addicted to bikinis, irritating her sisters and mother who says she "no longer wants to go swimming after seeing her daughter parade in bikinis all day." Yes, there's a photo gallery
source: news.asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
NewsFlash
 
Obama asks Congress to include strikes on Syria in their next attempt to repeal Obamacare
source: worldnews.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"10 states that are likely to legalize marijuana next" Whatever. Wake me up when I can buy cocaine at Rite-Aid
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
San Diego mayor waves goodbye. With his hand this time
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Cleveland)
 
 
 
Bible thumping
source: cleveland.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Man who took in tens of thousands of dollars by renting out houses that technically didn't belong to him only did it to "help people." Aw, isn't that nice?
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Police are looking for a man after grabbing a woman's arm in the park. Police sketch artist, who may think the Master of Puppets could possibly Load and Kill 'Em All, has a good idea who was St. Anger...And Justice For All
source: barrie.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Thieves steal 30 fishing poles, spray graffiti on moped. That's one strange fetish
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Bomb lands in Maryland tavern parking lot; Assad not there at the time
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Today is International Bacon Day. This is not a drill. Today is International Bacon Day
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Courier UK)
 
 
 
Doctors officially diagnose Mr. Dunbar with chronic lateness, note that it is an incurable terminal condition, and predict he will someday be the late Mr. Dunbar
source: thecourier.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pune Mirror (India))
 
 
 
Dear Pentho^H^H^H Dr. Mahinder, I slept with my neighbor and her daughter while my wife was in another town having our baby. She is coming back in a few days, what do I do? (text may be Not safe for work)
source: punemirror.in   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Telegraph)
 
 
 
It's one thing to make love to your girlfriend on the very same field where your team won a decisive victory earlier in the night. It's another thing to do it when your team ended the game in a 0-0 tie
source: dailytelegraph.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Signs are pointing to the Egyptians calling for the ouster of the government that ousted the representative of the guys that ousted the dictator that took over for the guy who helped oust the King of Egypt. Oust
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this antler man
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
If you wind up being convicted of a nuclear terrorist hoax, you just might be going about your job-hunting all wrong
source: news.nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Iowa City Press-Citizen)
 
 
 
Sitting in a parking garage in your car, with it in gear and your foot on the brake, passed out and covered in vomit, is no way to be found by the cops at 3:45 am on a Sunday morning. But in a college town, how else would you spend your time?
source: press-citizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Attention commuters: Service has been suspended on a portion of the NYC subway system due to A) a power failure, B) a terrorism alert, C) kittens on the tracks. If you picked C, you may proceed to Caturday
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Robbers break into car, homeowner chases after them in his underwear, neighbor helpfully shoots homeowner
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
16-year-old girl dies in joyride with 18-year-old behind the wheel. Oh, did I say 16 and 18? I meant 6 and 8
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Female train station worker in Tokyo throws unruly male across her shoulder for a free ride. Link includes animated reenactment complete with Mike Tyson-esque first strike by the guy
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Labor Day is a scam to keep you poor and miserable forever - so you might as well go ahead and enjoy getting drunk in your yard ... again
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Mother accused of forcing her 12 year-old daughter to beat up another driver at a gas station
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"Butt Flickers" beware. We're watching your ash
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Flight from California to New York diverted after passenger goes full Filner
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"Hello emergency services? There are beeeeeeeeeeeeeees on my car"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
World's largest avocado goes on sale. Scientists now begin work on world's largest bag of chips
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg officiates at John Roberts' gay wedding
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri August 30, 2013
(Metro)
 
 
 
'I would like to see some street gang member mess with someone in one of my chairs'
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
"Police officers asked the man, 46, why he was dressed as a woman. He said he needed to be responsive to the preferences of his clients"
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Honey is pretty much the only food that doesn't go bad. Why?
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Test driving a BMW while black? That's a tasing
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Yeah, but can they tell the difference between Metallica and Megadeth?
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this greasy guy playing capture the flag
source: l1.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Signing a waiver, lying about your age, consuming an energy drink, taking a snowboard for a trial run, attempting a stunt and breaking your neck is somehow it is the fault of the board manufacturer and the ski hill
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Smoking hot 18-year-old stabs her mother 78 times. Her father: "Isabella is a good kid, she's a good hearted. But I don't know what could've happened, honestly, to provoke this kind of reaction" (w/pics)
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Sufferin' Succotash" it's only a giant mouse
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
7.0 earthquake rumbles Aleutian Islands, dozens of igloos reduced to snow cones
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop these cheerful Chechen chaps
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's time for the Fark Weird News Quiz: three-day weekend, everybody's-already-drinking edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Who runs the world? Japanese schoolgirls
source: blogs.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Really? The best one-liners? No respect. No respect, I tells ya
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BusinessWeek)
 
 
 
Vladimir Putin is fracking crazy
source: businessweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Who stole what in this week's Friday Photo Fun? Contest ends 6:00pm EST
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun News Network)
 
 
 
Research shows couples can tune out spouse's voice
source: sunnewsnetwork.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
News: Violent felon neo-Nazi arrested for amassing personal arsenal of 18 guns and 40000 rounds. Fark: Was originally busted for trafficking in counterfeit sports apparel
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(This Is The West Country)
 
 
 
From TFA "An eyewitness said he found the severed penis in a neighbouring garden." and "It is thought the man may suffer from a mental health issue". You don't say
source: thisisthewestcountry.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
What's the worst thing you can say to a cop while being arrested?
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Anheuser-Busch InBev on opening 'Bud Lab' at University of Illinois: "Our dream is to be the best beer company in a better world,"
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Thieves steal car......door?
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kare11)
 
 
 
What climate change? Minnesota always had gators
source: kare11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
So what DO you do when a turkey pees on your patrol car?
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
The abandoned building where James Dean went to high school collapsed and is now just rubble without a cause
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
NJ innovator uses self-storage unit for storage, sleeping, and shopping
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Millions of people fail to take advantage of student loan forgiveness, surprising many who thought people who'd go hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt for a gender studies degree would be fiscally prudent
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Americans believe they have the right to life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness and internet access
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
This article contains acetaminophen. Please read less than eight times in twenty-four hours
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
PSA: Everything you thought you knew about the clitoris is probably wrong
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Providence Journal)
 
 
 
Turn-key operation for sale - business complex includes strip club, gay bathhouse, adult bookstore and personal service club. All poles freshly polished
source: providencejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bubblews)
 
 
 
Because America hasn't had a collective heart attack, Sprinkles LA introduces the Maple Bacon Cupcake, which can be ordered online. Mmmmm.... bacon cupcake
source: bubblews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
"Black budget" details the intelligence community isn't really the cloak and dagger Mensa meeting we're led to believe it is
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News Daily)
 
 
 
Some stories have it all: elephant polo, transgender beauty queens, and PETA
source: newsdaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Joshua Foust)
 
 
 
Remember when Glenn Greenwald's partner was held for nine hours and it was an outrage? According to court documents, it turns out he was carrying 58,000 pages of classified UK documents, including a list of British spies worldwide
source: joshuafoust.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SILive)
 
 
 
Ugly ass baby binturong welcomed at zoo. Of course it was welcomed. It emits a scent that smells like popcorn
source: silive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Meet the Andy Warhol of chimpanzees, who uses his tongue instead of a paintbrush
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
If you're going to try and smuggle live fish in your cargo pants past custom officials, the water dripping out of your pockets might be a dead giveaway
source: news.asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Former Navy sailor killed while shielding stranded family from an oncoming car
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Guys, grab a cup of coffee and read what the perfect Craigslist personal ad looks like. Rule #1: Use lots of "quotation" marks. Rule #2: Have an FAQ section
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Free Beacon)
 
 
 
Want to avoid detection by drones? Stop by the museum gift shop and we'll set you up with a "Anti-Drone Scarf". Only $450
source: freebeacon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediabistro)
 
 
 
Instead of reporting the news, reporter makes the news. In a good way
source: mediabistro.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Good news, Americans. WaPo has published a basic-level primer so you can understand what's going on in Syria. Yes, it defines what Syria is
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Detroit)
 
 
 
Detroit teachers offset wage cuts by moonlighting as "Sugar babies" who date wealthy men for money. Parents were shocked at the news--there are wealthy men in Detroit?
source: detroit.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
I can never remember what order to drink things in - is it beer, wine, liquor, bleach, or liquor, beer, wine, bleach, or liquor, wine, beer, bleach?
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Vietnam means never having to say 'I love you'
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
It turns out that women like dating cheap men. Hey, you gonna eat that?
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Police: If anyone knows these men say what you know now otherwise who knows whose nose is next
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live Science)
 
 
 
How long can a severed head live?
source: livescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop these thighs to drool over
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Thieves burglarize house, steal homeowner's car, crash it, then return the crashed car to the victim's driveway. You're welcome
source: fox8tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
Not to be outdone by fast food workers, exotic dancers sue, threaten strike over low wages and grabass
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Malaysia Chronicle)
 
 
 
Indonesia's tough: one minute you're comparing your wife's panties to the national flag, next minute you're facing a five-year prison term for it
source: malaysia-chronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Penis enlargement is on the rise in Italy, which is odd since most of Europe already thinks Italians are the biggest dicks
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KITV Honolulu)
 
 
 
Hawaiian schoolgirls petition for permission to wear shorter skirts. And there's really nothing else to say about that
source: kitv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Las Vegas Sun)
 
 
 
California wildfires prompts unhealthy air warnings in Nevada. Air quality now rated between "casino" and "brothel"
source: lasvegassun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medium)
 
 
 
Has Russian intelligence infiltrated and co-opted Wikileaks? Signs point to "da"
source: medium.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
USA "Very close" to discovering oil in Syria
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Do you know what's the best hangover cure? Hint: it's found in the children's medicine section
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
What exactly is deja vu? This is not a repeat
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
Ford's bacon-wrapped Fiesta sizzles
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Top ten U.S. cities to live in if you're a cheapskate. Mom's basement: Priceless
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 2 Fort Myers)
 
 
 
TV station videotapes drivers texting while driving. Florida: School bus drivers
source: nbc-2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Rapper Juicy J offers a $50,000 college scholarship for twerking. Because clearly, college-bound students are the right target audience for this
source: newsfeed.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
I know health and safety is not a high priority in China, but come on, this is just...mean
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KLTV Tyler)
 
 
 
Not news: Man's rent check bounced. Yikes: Police find him on his couch, sitting in his own filth. Ouch: He was covered in ants
source: kltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Yeah if you just had a tumor that had its own blood supply and was the size of a human removed, that would be considered a load off
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu August 29, 2013
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Sappy: Brother donates kidney to his dying sister. Fark: Which the nurse then promptly throws out
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WXYZ Detroit)
 
 
 
Man arrested for handcuffing his mother to a running car inside a garage and waiting for her to die
source: wxyz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
England backs out of starting World War III
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this water walker with wires
source: s.wsj.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DFW.com)
 
 
 
Actual headline: DFW poised to be mecca for Christian film industry
source: dfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Wheelchair-bound teen calls police over non-emergency. Police send in the SWAT team
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Kos)
 
 
 
Teabagger arrested after showing up on an overpass with an assault rifle and an "Impeach Obama" sign: "I was publicly humiliated." Um, nope - you were doing a pretty good job of that yourself, actually
source: dailykos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Ted Nugent's wife arrested for gun at the airport. Wait until Ted hears about this. He's going to crap himself
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Now you might want to sit down for this, but it appears China's judicial system may not be totally corruption-free and that the children of the country's ruling oligarchs get special, lenient treatment from the courts
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
You aren't poor because you are stupid. You are stupid because you are poor
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Green)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: You have a taste for the citrus tang and the natural acids.. so break it out. Citrus flavors go well in all sorts of things and can really help balance out dishes. But what to use? How? Why? Show us the goods
source: thedailygreen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Caption this melancholy man and perplexed poodle
source: avaxnews.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
You are an impurity in an otherwise beautiful universe
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Let's play, "Whose Fark is it Anyways" The game where the participants are silly and the power rankings mean nothing. Today's topic: Things not to say on a first date
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
There's a flea on the tail on the Marmot that bit the herdboy from the village of Ichke-Zhergez that died from the bubonic plague
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Newcomers to NYC ask the question real New Yorkers already know: Is it OK to make eye contact with others?
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Grist)
 
 
 
Good news: A hunter spots the endangered gray wolf in Kentucky, seen for the first time in 150 years. Bad news: Take a guess
source: grist.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fast Company)
 
 
 
The NSA will probably love this company, which wants to create a database of all the postal mail you receive
source: fastcompany.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"I had to explain to a cop that I was weaving in traffic because I was stirring my lube"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Mother-daughter duo get combined sentence of 27 years for running $1.1 million military dating scam. With photo of the sultry sirens
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NASA)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Dream Chaser test flight
source: www-pao.ksc.nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
Here are 10 frats that may have bro'd out a little TOO hard
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
DOJ to Colorado and Washington: Legalize it. Don't criticize it
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
A neighborhood in Brooklyn is being infested by what? A) Rats B) Hipsters C) Cars with Iowa license plates "They are a real plague"
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
It turns out the lady who splashed paint on monuments around Washington D.C. is a little on the crazy side
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Is "redshirting" your kindergartner racist? (Wait, that's a thing now?)
source: shine.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Pakistan to Hold Retrial of Doctor Who. EXTERMINATE
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
There's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
source: gma.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Brace yourself: these pictures of piglets and a bunny may cause D'aw
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Hungry for some artificial imitation meat flavored food substitute? Too bad, we're on strike
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
'Space laser' to test extraplanetary broadband, paving the way for high speed porn in outer space
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blisstree)
 
 
 
Here are ten grammar mistakes your making and you should stop because its annoying
source: openforum.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
10K run unexpectedly turns into '10K run away from the furious swarm of hornets'
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
New study says that men are as equally depressed as women.. I guess...whatever
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Well known birther, author and Tea Party activist offers life advice: "Sex is not about fun. You want to have fun? Read a book"
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Apparently, people are too stupid to know how to eat food
source: shine.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Social Reader)
 
 
 
If you scored well on your GMATs, you are an unethical bro lacking any entrepreneurial spirit (according to science)
source: socialreader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Parents who send their kids to private school: not "murderer" bad, per se, but still pretty high up there on the bad scale
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic Wire)
 
 
 
Creator of the foam finger is deeply upset with Miley Cyrus
source: theatlanticwire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston Post and Courier)
 
 
 
Man goes into Home Depot shed looking for a ho and finds one
source: postandcourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KUNC Greeley)
 
Audio
 
Colorado's urinals are giving advice to drunk people
source: kunc.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WOODTV Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
There's being a dick, and then there's "stealing a firetruck that served as a temporary grave marker for a dead six-year-old buried in a cemetery" kind of dick. Story does end up restoring some of your faith in humanity
source: woodtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Fox News attacks rap music because it's not positive like folk music was in the 1960s when right wing Republicans hated it and called folk singers "communists"
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Man shoots wife with cancer. In other news, you can shoot cancer at people
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Eight years after Katrina, Lower Ninth residents share their tales of modern-day pioneering. Gulf of Mexico thinks that's adorable, gets ready to share another 14 feet of water with them
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
MT Judge: In retrospect I probably shouldn't have said a 14-year old rape victim who killed herself was "as much in control" of the situation as her rapist teacher, and probably should have given him more than 30 days in jail. Sorry, my bad
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWSB ABC 7)
 
 
 
It's a nice touch to smile for the camera when a stranger photographs you committing a federal offense by digging up a sea turtle nest
source: mysuncoast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Looks like George Zimmerman's wife is tired of standing her ground with him
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
It's hot outside; everybody panic. WHY AREN'T YOU PANICKING??
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Airline drops all pretense, programs entertainment system to call passengers "idiots"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
After discovering empty bottle of viagra and a pile of birth certificates among her late stepfather's effects, woman has made it her quest to reunite the FIFTY FOUR children her stepdad fathered
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Life In The Fast Lane: Girlfriend pregnant, Wife knows, Lawyer wants money. Must sell 2002 Harley Davidson V-Rod (warning: sidebar stories may have Not safe for work images)
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Guy fails in suicide-by-guardrail, so he opts for little-used Plan B involving a power drill. Still alive
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Funeral interrupted by a voice from the clouds
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Iran works with Russia to stop the US from attacking Syria by threatening to attack Israel. I guess it's pretty serious
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Reason #32 not to have "THE CAPN" on your license plate
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
New Jersey is so serious about stopping asshats from texting and driving that they'll even go after the person who SENDS a text to a driver
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
MAJOR MEDIA NEWSFLASH: Pope Francis poses for a selfie at the Vatican. Fark: The major media doesn't know what a selfie is
source: photoblog.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this chairlamp, or lampchair, or whatever it is
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
"Five repercussions of a military strike in Syria." Only five?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Area man starts fake newspaper to sell pizza coupons. Happy 25th anniversary to The Onion, America's finest news source
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chosun (Korea))
 
 
 
Selling self-made pr0n in Best Korea? That's a shooting, even if your ex-boyfriend is Kim Jong-Un
source: english.chosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Butcher sells out of camel meat on Hump Day
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
First they came for stinky cigarettes. I did not like the stink, so I said nothing. Then they came for e-cigarettes. I don't care because...they look stupid anyway
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Excuse me Mr. Boss, did you just say I look like that fat reality-TV star Susan Boyle? That's a lawsuit
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Hairy pussy is becoming popular again
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
City bus service releases "10 Tips to make you a friendlier rider". "Please don't discharge your firearms while on board." is included. Yes, this is Texas, why do you ask?
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
If you're the man in a cow onesie who stole some porterhouse steak from the food shop, the New Zealand police would like a word with you
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Marijuana is the most popular illegal drug used around the world. At least that's what Captain Obvious shouted over the Pink Floyd CD as he licked his Doritos-stained fingers during an episode of 'Adventure Time'
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Denver Zoo: We should let visitors hand-feed our rhinoceros. What could possibly go wrong?
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
Win: $120k year job. Winning: $600k house. Won: Only $2k to kill your spouse and keep it all for yourself. Fark: Hired an FBI agent
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Fired bus drivers in Paraguay have discovered a unique way to call attention to their plight: crucifixion
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Hong Kong's smog is so bad, desperate tourism chiefs set up posters of sunny skylines so tourists can stand in front of them to take some nice photos
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
So I guess its a good thing that William Tell wasn't a pothead
source: blog.seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Mother of the Year contender: "I gave my daughter to Social Services so I could get drunk" (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
Bat populations reacting negatively to the news of Ben Affleck's casting as the caped crusader, stage sit-ins at local clinic
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MyFox Twin Cities)
 
 
 
Minneapolis, which doesn't cancel school for thirty feet of snow, closes schools because of "heat"
source: myfoxtwincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
Inmate dies in prison after decades-long fight. WHERE THE HELL WERE THE GUARDS?
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Step 2: Set up premium-rate phone number and profit off of telemarketing calls
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 434: "Upon Golden Light". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed August 28, 2013
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
What's worse than being stuck in traffic? Being stuck in traffic while the guy next to you keeps waving at you and flashing his weener
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Cougar sighting keeps elementary school students inside during recess. Witnesses say they could smell the perfume and see the high heels from fifty yards
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The only Crayons you need for this coloring book are red, white, and blue
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Great Falls Tribune)
 
 
 
Man who handled Roswell UFO debris dies 66 years later. Or so they'll have you believe
source: greatfallstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slashdot)
 
 
 
Science approved GTA VI: Babysitter Edition
source: games.slashdot.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Human lands on Mars: Home again, home again, jiggety-jig
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
Woman dies after her plastic shopping bag from Wal-Mart breaks, causing a can to fall on her big toe, causing it to fracture, causing it to get infected, causing her to die. The Aristocrats. No, I mean The Lawsuit
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
The world's most liveable cities. U-S-A, U-S - oh
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
The 50th Annual Dragon*Con Fark Party - Saturday, August 31, 1pm at Big Kahuna, Atlanta, GA
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Michigan Radio)
 
 
 
Photoshop these workers laying pipe
source: mediad.publicbroadcasting.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Don't you love it when your wife goes on Twitter to contradict your boss?
source: tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Study by Williams Institute shows transgender people serving in US military rate double that of general population. Semper Bi
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Man steals his father's body from the cemetery to "bring him back to life." SPOILER ALERT: it didn't work
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
19-year-old would have had a date for the prom, but she had to be at the gym in 26 minutes
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
This dating app will help you find that special someone to toss your salad
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
The brothels in Nevada are suffering thanks to the internet. Thanks, Al Gore
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
This might be important. Russia and China walk out of UN Security Council Meeting during Syria talks
source: investmentwatchblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KLTV Tyler)
 
NewsFlash
 
Hasan chopped
source: kltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shorpy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this coconut-cased contraption
source: shorpy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Onion)
 
 
 
Post your best attempt at an original Onion-style content piece. It can be a full article, op-ed, news in brief, or headline-only, as long as it works
source: theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tacoma News Tribune)
 
 
 
You are on the run from the police. So you paint your car and change the license plates. What? You forgot one of those two things?
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
If you're going to attempt to steal a woman's cell phone in broad daylight, be sure to pull up your sagging pants so you don't trip on them as you're running away
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Times)
 
 
 
What we need is more guns in *accidentally shoots teacher*... uh, schools
source: arktimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic Wire)
 
 
 
Pat Robertson apologizes for his "Gay people wear secret rings they try to give you AIDS with" remarks, blames senile dementia, promises to retire from public life. Just kidding, he doubles down on them
source: theatlanticwire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Attorney provides legal services for underage prostitute... in exchange for sexual favors from her. "Was that wrong? Should I not have done that?"
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bend Bulletin)
 
 
 
Clinic on why they banned pharma reps: "It just got very, very old and all of us felt that we were whores." Pharma reps unavailable for comment. Too busy whoring
source: bendbulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lehigh Valley Live)
 
 
 
"You never expect your neighbor's house to blow up"
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
When seconds count, Detroit police are only 60 minutes away
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Hovis workers in Wigan strike, in contract dispute apparently orchestrated by Dr. Seuss
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"My brother might have tortured two people to death in a horrible manner, then took a 16 year old girl for his own sexual amusement, but I SWEAR he wasn't a bad person"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Anne Frankly, teens take selfies at the most inappropriate places
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Oklahoma town's municipal water system now features hot and cold running...earthworms?
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Patients take pictures of their scary looking hospital "food." Fark: The one picture in the article that is supposedly of acceptable food looks less appetizing than everything else
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
With air strikes on Syria looking increasingly likely, stock of Tomahawk missile-maker Raytheon is blowing up
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Miami)
 
 
 
Pro Tip: If you're going to have sex with your step-daughter in a car containing illegal narcotics, you might want to find a better place to park than in front of an elementary school
source: nbcmiami.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Philadelphia police are looking into getting a third helicopter, just in case they need to burn down three neighborhoods at the same time
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Former UN weapons inspector says West has 'no authority in Syria', asks 'what's that drone doing flying around overhead?'
source: america.aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Physical evidence that we have indicates to us that he has more than likely shot his own testicle off" That's just nuts
source: dailymail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSPD Toledo)
 
 
 
Camper wakes up to wolf eating his head. Worst alarm clock ever
source: wspd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
How are things going in those other countries we liberated again?
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Fire crew surprised--and a little relieved--to discover that the emergency call about a chimpanzee stuck in a chimney was not a euphemism
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Pittsburgh pizza is not a thing. It's a nusiance
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Facebook gave up data on 38,000 users in 2013, mostly to US government agencies. George Orwell likes this post
source: america.aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
See we're not the only country with grandstanding politicians who waste time and money
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Woman failed ultimate field sobriety test when she tried to steal deputy's patrol vehicle
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BizPac Review)
 
 
 
Harvard study to gun grabbers: let us show you just how wrong you are
source: bizpacreview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
Who Knew? Turns out that using paralysis, intubation, and anal probes is a clear violation of a suspect's Fourth Amendment rights. The Police in Oak Ridge, Tennessee had no clue, say 'crack is wack'
source: rt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Startup founder hit by the same patent troll that hit Fark, calls Drew in for advice on how to destroy them
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Israel issues limited call up and readies missile defenses, no word on if they have Rush queued up
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Who were the mystery men that did the right thing by leaving money on the counter after taking items at NJ store that was left open? They were honest William Paterson University football players
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global Times (China))
 
 
 
Among the other things you can purchase insurance to cover, now you can get it in case you don't see the full moon because of clouds
source: globaltimes.cn   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wisconsin Gazette)
 
 
 
You'll hear 'freedom ring' today when institutions around the world ring bells to commemorate Martin Luther King Jr.'s "I have a dream" speech
source: wisconsingazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
He had a dream...that his court date for an indecent exposure at Walmart charge would not clash with the 50th anniversary of the March on Washington
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(US News)
 
 
 
Sen. Patrick Leahy (D-VT) 'Why are we using federal resources to interfere with Doritos and Oreo sales?'
source: usnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Hush puppies are the best deep fried food in existence." Um, cheese curds would like a word
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
"What killed Aaron Swartz?" Aaron in the bedroom with the really strong rope?
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lilac-breasted roller bird
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The world's most elegant drink, gin and tonic, once saved the British empire
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Free at last? Just a dream for Americans who want MLK's most famous speech
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Guy who posted Youtube videos on how to grow marijuana in your home gets busted for manufacturing a controlled substance. The local county sheriff weighed in: "He's not the brightest person in the world"
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
"I have a drone"
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
US intel agents intercepted phone calls FALSE FLAG from the Syrian Ministry of Defense FALSE FLAG asking their chemical weapons unit who in the fark told them FALSE FLAG to launch a chemical attack on a suburb full of civilians
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peninsula Clarion)
 
 
 
"Yeah that's a mighty big pumpkin there, but that hole will make it ineligible for the record"
source: peninsulaclarion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KMOV St. Louis)
 
 
 
Sri Lankan Police under fire for wasting money, cultural insensitivity. Fark: for holding a group wedding for their police dogs
source: kmov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
When you call in to work to say you're telecommuting that day, everyone knows you're just hungover
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
A Yukon hotel is short one severed human toe after a man swallowed it in a glass of whisky Saturday night
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Remember that time when you thought, oh hell, doing cocaine once can't hurt me?
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Selfie", "bitcoin", "phablet" among new words added to the OED. Yes... srsly
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSAZ West Virginia)
 
 
 
Teacher of the year has everything in her house repossessed. The person whose stuff was SUPPOSED to be repossessed is still drinking beer and watching Here Comes Honey Boo Boo on their big screen
source: wsaz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
One of the first fruit trees planted in America is still alive and well at age 383
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue August 27, 2013
(KLTV Tyler)
 
 
 
You ever just look at Nutella and think, "I bet that would be great deep fried?" Welp, you might want to mosey on over to the Texas State Fair
source: athens.kltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Russian police seize painting of Vladimir Putin in a negligee. The police chief said that "painting our leader in a housecoat is outrageous." The painting of Putin in a dress will never see the light of day
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
6,000 people lose power due to a criminal mastermind's decision to steal a bucket truck and press the "up" button
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Braiser)
 
 
 
After guest gives zero-star review to widely respected English pub on TripAdvisor, angry pub chef gives zero-star rating to said guest: "You claim to be foodies. I have never met a self professed foodie start his meal with a bowl of chips"
source: thebraiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Gossip)
 
 
 
Kentucky schoolchildren alert First Lady: "Your food tastes like vomit". That's why her husband eats at 5 Guys, kids
source: thehollywoodgossip.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
"A wheelchair-bound man was bludgeoned with a tub of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter last Wednesday in South Lake Union"
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cat house
source: mitademo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Syrian army attacks old gray lady
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Right Wing Watch)
 
 
 
Pat Robertson: Gays use special rings to cut people in order to spread AIDS. World: Seriously, Pat? Seriously?
source: rightwingwatch.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Group of young men go to a store to get some goods, find the door lock not working after closing time, take the goods and leave the cash. See there's still honesty out there in the world
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Lawyer for recently fired Fox News executive has a message for Roger Ailes: Be afraid. Very afraid
source: livewire.talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Now here's a Kickstarter campaign Fark can get behind
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVB Boise)
 
 
 
In a shocking turn of events, police say three people in garden City ID were attacked by robbers armed with a cattle prod
source: ktvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Now would be a really good time to ask your boss for some time off if you're working as a night janitor at some government building in Damascus, Homs or Aleppo
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
140 bankers charged for impersonating Congressmen
source: dealbook.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ann Arbor News)
 
 
 
Usually the expression 'caught red handed' isn't so literal
source: annarbor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(US Census Bureau)
 
 
 
"Married with children" is on the decline, as the U.S. Census Bureau has made so Al Bundyntly clear
source: blogs.census.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Big news today: Neil Armstrong, dead for over a year, is still dead
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Now I Know)
 
 
 
Your fun fact of the day: Every panda in the world belongs to China
source: nowiknow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Wife has cancer and I need your Photoshop skills. DIT
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Stop for me in the crosswalk? "I will shoot your face off"
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News Daily)
 
 
 
France is "ready to punish" Syria, presumably by halting exports of brie and Château Margaux
source: newsdaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Well, I was an introvert before it was cool
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Here it is, a list of all the famous movie lines you've been screwing up over the years. Yes, that's one there. That one, too
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVB Boise)
 
 
 
Man dies of morning wood
source: ktvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
1) Open a university, charge students $25 each to take your entrance exam. 2) Fail all 25,000 students who apply. 3) PROFIT
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger DUCK *BOOM* DUCK *BOOM* badger badger badger badger
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Hey foxy lady
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Birmingham Mail)
 
 
 
America, we have failed as a nation: the World Gravy Wrestling Championships are held in Britain and not the Midwest
source: birminghammail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Some French dude just submitted a bill to make English the official language of Wisconsin. It hardly seems fair to require an entire state to learn a new language, monsieur
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Rare, preventable newborn bleeding disorder making a comeback in Tennessee because a shot hurts
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 29 Charlottesville)
 
 
 
When you give a guy a ride home, make sure a) neither of you are drunk, b) the guy won't rat you out for a warrant when you get pulled over, and c) that you have a backup plan for what to do with the dog when the police arrest you both
source: nbc29.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Anti-gay conservative wants Shep Smith to "come out of the closet" but won't reveal his own personal sexual behavior to the world
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Social Reader)
 
 
 
Sorry, but spending less time at the office won't make you happier. We're all doomed
source: socialreader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Kentucky loves crazy tentacle rape, and other facts you wish you didn't know about our nation's porn habits
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Foreign countries are imposing their scary laws on the US, like legalizing sodomy between two consenting adults, warns Christian law firm
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Introducing the Megaburgerpizza, which is either a new Japanese fast food invention or a SyFy original movie
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Dirt)
 
 
 
Hey, you know what would be hilarious? If we took pictures of our fraternity's members selling cocaine on campus, then uploaded those pictures to our Facebook page
source: techdirt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Twenty-percent of adults still don't have smart phones or broadband internet, however they compensate for it with an ancient power called "attention span"
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
In the most predictable followup to a story ever, the big cat that was roaming the streets of Detroit was shot dead by a resident and dumped in a trash can
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post Canada)
 
 
 
Maple bacon jam identified as cause of cronut illnesses. If we can't trust bacon what can we trust?
source: huffingtonpost.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STV.tv)
 
 
 
Kazakh soccer manager defends sheep-sacrificing ritual ahead of international game in Scotland, says it shouldn't be a problem to source a sheep locally
source: news.stv.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
CNN editor forced to deny Onion story which claims she thought Miley Cyrus was more important than escalating civil war in Syria, grinding unrest in Egypt or Martin Luther's 'I have a dream' anniversary. Fark: Doesn't deny it
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Grand Rapids, MI police recover pet pig that had been listed as Missing and Presumed Bacon
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Kerry, "The use of chemical weapons is reminiscent of Ghengis Khan." Syria calls Kerry a liar, says, "They never used chemical weapons in Cambodia at Christmas time"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Sometimes comic book writers get to be the heroes
source: gailsimone.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
What are they are eating in Kyrgyzstan? Barbecued marmot. What are they are catching in Kyrgyzstan? The Black Plague
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
"I swear to god if your [expletive] with me I will steal your car and melt it down to [expletive], then busy in your house and [expletive] on your [expletive] couch, paybacks a [expletive] keep playing [your dog] home alone"
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier-Journal)
 
 
 
Bra-wearing goat auditioning to join Miley Cyrus on stage at next MTV awards show
source: courier-journal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Orlando police looking for the world's most desperate criminal, a man accused of robbing a Dollar Tree at gunpoint
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop this weight-watching frog
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
If getting drunk, taking off all your clothes, stealing a whale -watching boat, and doing doughnuts out in the bay is wrong, I don't want to be right
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inventorspot)
 
 
 
Upcoming Chinese electric car to be named Snowden. Problem?
source: inventorspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BusinessWeek)
 
 
 
Time Warner Cable offers free rabbit ears so customers can again enjoy 1966 CBS quality programming
source: businessweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Well, it's a good thing a college degree is worth five times as much to your career, am I right? Hello? Anyone? Anyone?
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Germany: No more Greek-Style. Fraus everywhere rejoice
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Naked man out walking his dog claims he's in God's house, then threatens cops. Tasers work a lot better when they don't have to go through clothes
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
George Zimmerman wants $200K to $300K reimbursement from Florida since he was found not guilty. According to Florida law, he could very well get it
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook