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Sun March 24, 2013
(Paste Magazine)
 
 
 
FARK's Drew Curtis and Wil Wheaton will collaborate on brewing craft beer. The magic happens on April 2 following a meet and greet at Stone Brewing World Bistro & Gardens
source: pastemagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Man gets busted for DUI, calls mom to bail him out. She shows up drunk and gets busted for DUI as well
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Look. Up in the sky. It's a bird. It's a plane. It's me in dad's Audi
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
For the past 15 years, a group of George Washington enthusiasts have used the "Where's George" website to track where dollar bills have been going across the US
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Whites-only tour buses causing quite a stir in Sweden. Bork bork bork
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Michael Moore claims that 90% of the guns in the U.S. are owned by scared white people
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
What kind of person doesn't keep rice in their pantry? I mean... Really DIT
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Photoshop these Peruvian pipe fitters
source: msnbcmedia.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KLTV Tyler)
 
 
 
Seasons don't fear the reaper. Nor do the wind, the sun or the rain. (M-O-O-N)
source: kltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Cop secretly records his supervisor ordering him to assume young black men are criminals in a) rural Georgia b) small town in Mississippi c) the Bronx
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
Dad I got bad news, I got arrested for Public Intoxication. That's OK son, I got arrested for DUI. But I am the sheriff so I think the judge will go easy on us
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Excerpt from 'Mother of the Year' candidate portfolio; , 'My mum's in doing the shopping, call her if I need anything'. Note left on baby left in car
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
It's hard to attach a dollar amount to a police car ramming into two guys on a dirt bike, unless you're a lawyer. Spoiler: It's $100 million
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
For the record, it's not a crime to jump out of a van in Florida and chase after a woman who is jogging
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSAV Savanna)
 
 
 
Cash-strapped city governments are selling park statues to raise cash. Subby calls dibs on the Statue of Liberty
source: wsav.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Eggs-traordinary
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this drag on the dunes
source: 25.media.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Best Korea releases video of 'defeating' US troops. Still better than Red Dawn 2012
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Is "Wind Turbine Syndrome" a real disease or just something dreamed up by crackpots?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Hallmark cards would very much like the taxpayer to subsidize Saturday mail delivery for its $3 pieces of paper
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Pull on your good red pants, get out your best green shirt and snap on the Walkman. It's spring - time to go a'courting the ladies at Target
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Player Effort)
 
 
 
Millionaire, and one of the "most powerful women entrepreneurs" according to CNN, is abusing Kickstarter to raise money to send her 9 year old daughter to camp
source: playereffort.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Townhall)
 
 
 
Professor forces a student to violate his religious beliefs. Student complains the college. College does A) apologize, B) Bring the Professor before a committee, or C) Suspend the student and go into denial mode
source: townhall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
There are times you go to IHOP drunk, Then there are times like this
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Home of exiled Russian oligarch and vocal Putin critic swept, and found clean of poisons, nuke material, other toxins after owner is found dead of apparent suicide. Vladimir heard chuckling, "Vhat do you think vhe are zese days - moose and squirrel?"
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Papers link top China university to army 'hacking' unit - confirmed by satellite images of nearby dumpsters filled with empty Mountain Lew bottles and Choutos bags
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Instashop Contest: Photoshop this magazine cover and reader
source: timenewsfeed.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
World landmarks go dark for "Earth Hour," discover that "Grab Everything In Here That's Not Nailed Down Hour" was equally as successful
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
You might think that this is just another story of a Florida teacher getting into trouble together with one of his students, but this time, it happened during a skydiving lesson
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
"Using the system developed through decades of work by British scientists and military contractors ... [grown] men could discuss their love for a cartoon pony show, even forging bold new identities as "bronies"
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Vidal Sassoon's will reveals one final heir cut
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
We have a new FAIL picture for captioning as someone parks in a rather unusual place
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPTV Portland)
 
 
 
"I was surprised how many people stood up against it," Warner said. "It was nice to see how many people were sticking up for her, and not letting people do that to her"
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Soshiok)
 
 
 
Gimme a recall/ Gimme a recall/ Recall me all those pieces of that Kit Kat bar
source: soshiok.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
You just had to bring up Michela's dog at the family birthday cookout, didn't you? Yes, that dog. The dog her father got rid of while Michela was in jail. Now she's whacking grandma with a shoe
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AskMen)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Lies your parents told you. LGT goes to inspiration
source: askmen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HelenaIR.com)
 
 
 
Schools are shocked, SHOCKED that students would set up derogatory high school Facebook pages
source: helenair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
New Weather Channel series explores rogue planet doomsday scenario, gives the idiots at the Weather Channel another reason to not show local weather on the 8s, or any weather coverage at all
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
After another sinkhole opens up it becomes clear that the earth is trying to swallow Florida
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
San Francisco Zoo debuts ugly ass Sumatran tiger cub
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Mechanics)
 
 
 
AWD is over-rated because some reporter who test drives the car, and parks in an underground garage thinks AWD isn't needed and snow tires will do. Wait till he sees the pictures from Lancashire today
source: popularmechanics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
NASA slams spending cuts that put Earth at risk of undetected killer asteroids. What could possibly go wrong?
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Farker vincent_blackshadow is on the mend. Not only has he charmed nurses into stealing bacon for him, they've also turned a blind eye so he could have his first beer since he was admitted to the ICU on Feb 7th. DIT
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Saudi Arabia's new tourism slogan: GO AWAY
source: world.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
Nine-year-old boy outgeeks us all, is named chess master
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
Vancouver woman demands removal of museum's whale bone porn collection. In other news, there's whale bone porn (Not safe for work images)
source: news.nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Hands down best idea for home delivery service for women. Period
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Union Leader)
 
 
 
Two men described as "creepy and weird", and claiming to be FBI agents, break into a TV station at 4 a.m. to "get their story out"
source: unionleader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Maximum trolling: not only naming your Sept. 11 baby "Jihad," but sending him to pre-school in a t-shirt that says "I am a bomb"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Burning a gay teen to death gets "prankster" three and a half years in jail. Stay classy England
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Grumpy Cat is not impressed with Time Magazine's photoshoot
source: newsfeed.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 23, 2013
(WGRZ Buffalo)
 
 
 
Ugly ass polar bear cub to get ugly ass playmate
source: wgrz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Old and busted: remote-controlled drone attacks. New hotness: remote-controlled animal attacks
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLKY Louisville)
 
 
 
Asking your son to pull up his pants? That's a stabbing
source: wlky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Saplings from the tree that inspired Anne Frank as she hid from the Nazis in Amsterdam will be replanted in 11 cities in the US
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
News: Man does 23 years in a NY Prison for murder. Other News: Released after his conviction is overturned. Fark: Suffers a heart attack on his second day of freedom
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Meet the Rosa Parks of atheism, who dreams of a day when godlessness will not be an all-white-men's club
source: articles.orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Photoshop this zero-gravity goofiness
source: msnbcmedia.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
As the screaming woman got closer, she reached into her bra and pulled out a stun gun, according to police. The messenger tried to make his getaway, but the pregnant woman gave chase and soon caught him
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Have you ever wanted a personal helper monkey? Just remember the goods and bads of owning one
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Sixteen year-old girl believes she has superpowers because of synesthesia
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
If you're going to steal beer, don't do it on video. If you do it on video, don't fight the clerk. If you're going to fight the clerk, don't yell racist epithets at the crowd watching, but if you're going to, you better run faster than this guy
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 4 Charleston)
 
 
 
Month-old bear cubs left in a box by the road were reunited at a rescue facility
source: abcnews4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
8 hurt, 3 arrested, 2 shot. Just your average midday wreck in downtown Atlanta
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"This is just one more example of why all Internet casinos must be shut down"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
How is Best Korea obtaining hard cash? By sending diplomats 20 kilograms each of state manufactured meth and making them sell it on streets of foreign countries
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Duluth News Tribune)
 
 
 
Police catch serial lobster thief red-handed. Fun fact: If someone steals a live crustacean from Red Lobster and it's recovered, apparently it goes back in the tank
source: duluthnewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Another TSA employee tries to claim "Finders Keepers" - for a $2000 laptop (Dumbass, Asinine tags redundant for TSA, happened in Florida, can TSA get their own Fark tag yet?)
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
A 7-foot alligator breaks through a school fence, and rather than wait for a trapper, one mother decided to wrestle it to the ground in order to protect the children
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Headline: "Girls outnumbered in New York's elite public schools" Article: Boys outnumbered in elite schools
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minnesota Public Radio)
 
 
 
Flu season is winding down. It was an average year. But the media thought it could be the worstest ever. EVERYBODY PAN- please hold
source: minnesota.publicradio.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
Ok kids, if you're going to have sex with a minor, don't record it on video. However, if you must record it on video, for chrissakes do NOT post it on facebook
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
Rugged, independent, small-government farmers to receive $16 billion in crop insurance payments for drought of 2012
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Three men charged in UK 'Oompa Loompas attack;' cops say they really weren't that hard to pick out of the line-up
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Urology clinic throws in a free pizza with all vasectomies, gives a few slices to make up for the cut
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tacoma News Tribune)
 
 
 
Washington State forms Pabst blue-ribbon task force to examine campus drinking culture that encourages bingeing
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hawaii News Now)
 
 
 
If you lost your camera and its underwater case while vacationing in Maui five and a half years ago, don't worry - folks in Taiwan totally have your back
source: hawaiinewsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Memo to Cops: 1) Don't wiretap without a warrant, 2) especially not a judge and 3) don't create evidence by including your own voice
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
...and that's how I became the youth pastor sex offender of Bel Air
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KGW Portland)
 
 
 
Obie the obese dachshund has lost 42 pounds, would love a steak but he's already used all his points for the day
source: kgw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(xoJane)
 
 
 
"I decided I would use OkCupid and Craigslist so I could have dinner three times a week without opening my wallet"
source: xojane.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
VP Biden arrives in Rome, immediately sets off a perfect Photoshop contest (LGT source)
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Study shows that pollution from traffic causes as much childhood asthma as secondhand smoke. So where are the groups that want cars outlawed?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
IRS spends $60,000 for a Star Trek-themed training video. And if that wasn't bad enough, they had people dressed in Next Generation era uniforms on the bridge from the Original Series
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KBOI2 Boise)
 
 
 
A soldier in Afghanistan saves a wounded cat from the battlefield and nurses him back to health.The soldier soon realizes that the bit of compassion and love that cat showed him is what it took to stay strong. Have a dusty Caturday
source: kboi2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
LAPD KOs N2O
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
If you're a political strategist and are going to write a disparaging Facebook post about your candidate's political enemy, make sure you don't use "the c-word, slang for female genitalia"
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Finally... Neiman-Marcus decides to cater to the tastes of the average Farker
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
It's a bird. No, it's a plane. No, it's actually a car made out of an abandoned Cessna and an 1980s Toyota van
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AccuWeather)
 
 
 
Large meteor spotted over eastern US, unconfirmed reports of an impact near Maryland/Delaware state line
source: accuweather.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
Inventor of Cheez Whiz shocked to find out that it no longer contains cheese, because we all expect nutritious, wholesome ingredients in a product that spells cheese with a zed
source: fullcomment.nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun News Network)
 
 
 
Turns out "Bro Code" is evolutionary
source: sunnewsnetwork.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Premade toddler foods come with an adult-sized dose of salt
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Creepy masseur guy, take two. It's this week's Mugshot Roundup
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
It's official: Eating a salad is more dangerous than eating a cheeseburger
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 22, 2013
(KOB4)
 
 
 
Protip: Before stealing the wheels and battery from a vehicle you found wrecked along a remote road, check for victims
source: kob.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Just another day at Wal-Mart
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Now landing without clearance at Birmingham-Shuttlesworth International Airport, a new 300-pound sign. One dead
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Much like getting a tattoo in a language you cannot read you should not wear a t-shirt that you cannot decipher either or jailarity might happen
source: shine.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lava poker
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Mango And Milkshake are all grown up now but still BFF (WARNING: cuteness overload)
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Western PA Man charged with drinking $102,000 worth of pre-Prohibition whiskey
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man has four kidneys, three pancreases, huge medical bills and a partridge in a pear tree
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
New ad campaign featuring wet, topless Emma Watson purple monkey dishwasher snorkel Albuquerque splunge
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Look, poors. You can mock us job creators all you want, but we suffer too. Sometimes we live in 11th century castles that weren't built for cars
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Waah, my illness has become trendy
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Air traffic controllers picked a good week to keep sniffing glue
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(8 News Now)
 
 
 
Man found actually innocent after spending 20 years in prison for murder. Now Florida wants him to serve three years for violating his parole 22 years ago
source: 8newsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
24 images that will make your miserable, decrepit and pointless life have some meaning again
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Woman is shocked. Shocked. That Massage Therapist molested her during massage. With "Come on, you got to be kidding, you thought this was a legit masseuse?" Mugshot
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's Friday afternoon and you haven't been sober in three hours. So that means it's time for the Fark Weird News Quiz. NO COMPLAINING, you had all week to study for this
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Six of the world's seven billion people have mobile phones but only 4.5 billion have a toilet, according to a U.N. report. Can you (flushing sound) me now?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Looking cool: Posting a Facebook photo showing you rolling in a pile of cash. Not looking cool: Posting a Facebook showing you rolling in a pile of cash while owing 3 years of child support
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
If you live in England and receive a marijuana-scented scratch-n-sniff card in the mail, don't worry -- it's just the police trying to turn you into a sniffer dog
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Redding Record Searchlight)
 
 
 
Federal magistrate finds that some Koontz from the Parks Service destroyed evidence in boy's death
source: redding.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this smoking kid
source: static.guim.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
Boobies
 
Vincent_Blackshadow and FishWife are still over their heads with hospital bills. To inspire further donations to the cause, Subby is now offering an incentive. Link goes to SFW sample of incentive. More details in thread
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The most rage-inducing advice column you'll read this week
source: news.efinancialcareers.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Woman suffers from "dangerous exercise allergy", also known as "best excuse ever"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phoenix New Times)
 
 
 
Birther lawyer Larry Klayman wants to know if Joe Arpaio recall chairman is a "homo" who "want[s] my nuts"
source: blogs.phoenixnewtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Betabeat)
 
 
 
Bill Gates is offering $100,000 to the inventor of the next generation condom. Ideas to the right
source: betabeat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
He cuts the hair of incredibly famous people, he's a world-class sculptor, and perhaps the world's greatest living master of martial arts-he actually IS, the most interesting man in the world
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Northern Territory News)
 
 
 
"He was a bit confused and thought he had got his injuries wrestling crocodiles"
source: ntnews.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Woman suddenly attacked by mime. Mime charged with battery, ordered a mental evaluation, spends time in invisible jail cell
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Finance)
 
 
 
Herbal male enhancement pill recalled for actually enhancing male performance
source: dailyfinance.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 46 Atlanta)
 
 
 
Roofing contractor asked by broke homeowner if he happens to have any dogfood he could spare for her dog. A decade later, he's shelling out 800,000lbs of free dog and cat food a year to poor families with pets
source: cbsatlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sly Oyster)
 
 
 
No big deal, just a photo of some guy standing atop the Burj Khalifa looking alllll the waaaay down
source: slyoyster.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
If you thought this year couldn't get any worse, they've had to cancel the World Pooh Sticks Championship due to bad weather
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Drug dealer comes and goes during botched robbery
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orangeville)
 
 
 
Have you ever tried to set a high score on those roadside radar warning signs that show your speed? Someone in Orangeville is now playing the home version
source: orangeville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Fetus found in hospital trash bin, officially kicking off prom season
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nature World News)
 
 
 
Millions of dead prawns was up on beach in Chile. Well they're already seasoned, let's put them on the grill
source: natureworldnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Farking Farker finds a live hand grenade metal detecting in Golden Gate Park. Farking Farker is me. Photos and video if this goes green you goofy mods
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
Chase Bank customers temporarily see '0' balance after computers are accidentally set to "inevitable forecasting"
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Catch him if you can...oh, you can. Alrighty then
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
The creepiest place in America right now might be the abandoned Astrodome. "Skyboxes are furnished with outdated furniture and old Zenith television sets. Astroturf sits carelessly tossed on the stadium floor, folded over like discarded carpet"
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCPO Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Silly news: Ohio county files charges against Punxsutawney Phil. You've got to be shiatting me news: For misrepresenting an early spring. Fark: They're seeking the death penalty
source: wcpo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
While everyone else in the Bay Area got to enjoy dancing bears, the prisoners on Alcatraz got to trip out on glowing millipedes
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Today's reason why the Steubenville rape case happened, why the media wasn't properly outraged enough: there aren't enough girls playing high school football
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WISTV)
 
 
 
Pope Francis continues his campaign of being humble AND cool by reaching out to Bruce Wayne's raspy-voiced 'good friend', Batman
source: wistv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
You've just been tackled after trying to pepper spray some dollar store employees. Do you: a) just lay there, b) apologize profusely, or c) hand the peppery spray to your daughter and yell, "You know what to do, baby. Spray it"
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Burma in state of emergency. Buddhists torch mosque. Buddha saves
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this methane ignition
source: images.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"He now plans to relax and reconnect with his family" (and sue the balls off of the NYPD)
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Subby learned two things from the article. First, there is such thing as a 'Sandy Hook Truther' and second, that subby has fusion paranoia
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Scotland to vote on independence. This is a repeat from 1296
source: worldnews.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Genetically modified version of herpes simplex virus type 1 found to shrink melanoma tumors. Well that explains the cast of the Jersey Shore
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
The reason your three-year-old won't share her toys with the other kids isn't because she doesn't understand the concept of sharing. It's because she's an asshole
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
Texas shootout could be tied to Colorado slaying. New Mexico seen whistling innocently as Arizona packs the bags to cross the border
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Universal Hub)
 
 
 
Somehow, "trying it out in our fresh holes" made it past editors onto the Internet
source: universalhub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Coming hours will decide Cyprus' fate. Dogs and cats already seen shopping for apartments together
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
"One of the most surprising, and perhaps confounding, facts of charity in America is that the people who can least afford to give are the ones who donate the greatest percentage of their income"
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
Video
 
FARK's Drew Curtis appears on Bloomberg Television's "Money Moves" and tells how to beat patent trolls at their own game
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Michael- GPS Tracker - $250, Nikon camera with zoom lens - $1600, Catching my LYING HUSBAND and buying this billboard with our investment account - Priceless. -Jennifer
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Amanda Bynes: "I want Drake to murder my vagina"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
More on the guy who shot the Colorado prison head, later shot by Texas cops: "He was eventually shot by authorities who say he is essentially dead but is hooked up to equipment for organ harvesting"
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WAFB Baton Rouge)
 
 
 
From our Department of Questionable Homeowner Decisions: "While cleaning up, she saw snake, threw gasoline on the snake, lit the snake on fire"
source: wafb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Coca Cola won't have kosher Coke ready for Passover, Jewish exodus to Mexican Coca Cola is expected
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
7-Eleven considering replacing front door with garage door
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Do cookies really taste better when dipped in tea? Here comes the science old bean
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 21, 2013
(Sun News Network)
 
 
 
There's the odd couple and then there's killing your roommate because of a mess in the kitchen
source: sunnewsnetwork.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass gerenuk born at zoo... wait, wtf is a gerenuk?
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
A 47-year-old Michigan woman has developed a bone disease rarely seen in the U.S. after she drank a pitcher of tea made from at least 100 tea bags daily for 17 years
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Chihuahua acts as seeing eye dog for blind Husky friend
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
News you can take with a grain of salt: high sodium diets kill 2.3 million people a year
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Right Wing Watch)
 
 
 
Pat Robertson tells viewers to beware of "scamsters in religious garb quoting the Bible, I mean run from them"
source: rightwingwatch.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this caught canine
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
What a 22-pound $1,000 Easter Egg with Angry Birds coming out of it looks like
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
And then there was that time when the Secret Service nearly killed Ahmadinejad by accident
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Photoshop this thing by the artist Christo
source: darkroom.baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metronews.ca)
 
 
 
Voice coach says that using a sex toy gives singers an extra octave. Possibly two, depending on where they use it
source: metronews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Planet Ivy)
 
 
 
Woman finds dead kitten in sausage. Does she a) Vomit, b) sue, or c) build a shrine to it?
source: planetivy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun News Network)
 
 
 
Bacon, ice cream and cheese are all good for you. Excuse me while I die of happiness
source: sunnewsnetwork.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Woman gives birth to baby on highway during rush hour, marking the first time a project on the PA Turnpike was completed in nine months
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The American Academy of Pediatrics says gay couples should be allowed to marry to help ensure the health and well-being of their children, citing research confirming that such kids tend to turn out FABULOUS
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
A spokesman for Hell sighs heavily and announces construction of a a new "special place" after the FBI arrests a couple that was planning on starting a babysitting business to get access to kids they could drug and use to produce child porn
source: usnews.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(3 News New Zealand)
 
 
 
Road very slippery after glue spill
source: 3news.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baton Rouge Advocate)
 
 
 
Louisiana State University Board of Supervisors names F.King Alexander as finalist for university president after passing over Hugh Jass and Heywood Jablome
source: theadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Security guard fired for joking about the CEO being kidnapped the way Clark Griswold's boss was abducted in the movie 'National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.' He couldn't be more surprised if he woke up with his head sewn to the carpet
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Back in my day, "Flogging the Seal" was a fun and harmless teen activity
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
Not news: burglar breaks into department store via the roof. Fark: in the middle of the day, during business hours. Fall through the ceiling, scuffle, and tasering ensues (with criminal mastermind mugshot)
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Stupid couple buys $220K Lamborghini. Stupid couple crashes $220K Lamborghini. Stupid couple flees $220K Lamborghini
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Austrian study finds one in five skiers are drunk. No figures for snowboarders, because they were unable to put bongs down long enough to answer questions
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Two small-town teen burglars found to have shot themselves several times after being spotted by the homeowner. Seems legit
source: crimeblog.dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Journal News)
 
 
 
West Point employee up on federal charges for grand theft meatball
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
The twelve biggest reasons Duke sucks. Duke sucks
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
Mayor reportedly offers to change his title to "Sugardaddie" for $1 million
source: buford.patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Straight A student fails first chemistry test
source: usnews.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Haaretz)
 
 
 
Apparently, Palestinians really want to play World of Warcraft and Everquest. Debate on the difference between RPGs and MMORPGs on the right
source: haaretz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
How is headdline formed?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Step One: Win $10 million in lottery. Step Two: Blow it all away in less than a decade. Step Three: Don't profit
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Alcohol may have been a factor
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
University of Tennessee pulls out of sex week
source: radio.foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMAZ Macon)
 
Video
 
Georgia has their own version of the trunk monkey: the trunk deer
source: 13wmaz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Ah, Switzerland. Come for the cheese and chocolate, stay for the "fugitive acupuncturist" with a gun and samurai sword being arrested by a SWAT team for giving his music students AIDS
source: articles.washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Two modern-day Thelma & Louise steal eight cases of beer and lead police on a high speed chase, ultimately jumping a curb at 70 miles an hour to get into a construction zone. Bonus: Thelma & Louise mugshots
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Only in Australia would somebody catch by hand venomous snakes in order to flush out invasive rabbits. "I told you it was a possible technique"
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Pro-tip: When applying for a job do not write a bomb threat on the back of the application
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly Burbs)
 
 
 
If your "friend" OD's on heroin at your place, you should call the authorities to take his body, then call the florist to order funeral flowers. If you instead leave his body in the florist's parking lot, just claim you're easily confused
source: phillyburbs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Taking ecstasy and then chewing up a sex toy before trying to bite off your client's penis is no way to make it as an escort. With mugshot of what a Florida ecstasy-eating escort looks like
source: articles.orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveLeak)
 
 
 
Looks like its time for that Atlanta mall security guard to do a kickstarter project, he's out of a job
source: liveleak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Not news: man fights with neighbor. News: Takes her hostage and tries to burn her house down. Happy ending: Her pro wrestler son saves her life. Fark: By uprooting a tree and throwing it through her window
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South China Morning Post)
 
 
 
Photoshop this slightly distracted Chinese staircase attendant
source: scmp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Suicide bomber attacks Pennsylvania home. Subby stops worrying about Al-Qaeda and Al-Shabaab, starts worrying about Al-lentown
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Maui News)
 
 
 
Teacher at small Catholic school secretly taped students, but that's okay, because it was in band and the tape got them invited to play at Carnegie Hall, on the USS Intrepid, and at the Statue of Liberty
source: mauinews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Jane Goodall tramps all over the rights of other authors, plagiarizes bits of their work for her own book
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(State of Virginia)
 
 
 
PETA - Proudly Euthanizing Thousands of Animals
source: vi.virginia.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Man who sold tattoo "ad space" on his face to porn sites realizes he might not have thought his cunning plan all the way through
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Carnival cancels cruises after taking Triumph out of service for being pooped on
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gallup)
 
 
 
On the 10th anniversary of the Iraq war, 53% of Americans say the war was a mistake. The other 47% are still deciding between disaster, debacle or catastrophe
source: gallup.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHON2 Honolulu)
 
 
 
High-dive wannabe forgets the very first, very important rule of high-dive: don't miss the pool
source: khon2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(107.5 The River)
 
 
 
Ex-Tennessee Titans cheerleader accused of seducing a 12-year-old, being too drunk to differentiate between a boy and a man
source: 1075theriver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Bacon: the perfect food. The BLT: a perfect sandwich made with the perfect food. The PLT: a perfectly disgusting sandwich made with NO NO DON'T SCROLL DOWN
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Penn State to honor Dick Lippin. Again?
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Married couple's romantic evening of minigolf and a hotel room goes awry when hubby realizes that costs like $100
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
After admitting five years of austerity has only made everything worse, UK announces they'll turn it all around by giving taxpayer-backed home loans to anyone that can spell their name
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blackpool Gazette)
 
 
 
The early bird gets the worm--and the dog shavings from the salon floor
source: blackpoolgazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Turtle study shows that once again, humans are dicks
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
I see your Beer Madness and raise you Cocktail Madness
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Man to sell his house for Bitcoins, only to lose it all after deleting the wrong file on his computer
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
vincent_blackshadow update. Things are cool
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
I went home with a waitress, the way I always do. How was I to know she was with the Chinese too?
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when you scratch an itch on your back and find a knife blade that's been buried there for three years?
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Mad Men's Jon Hamm really needs to pick a side
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Caller)
 
 
 
The school that suspended a boy for a gun-shaped Pop Tart has also outlawed hugging, homemade food, pushing kids on swings, sneezing, the apostrophe and breath mints. Only two of those are untrue
source: dailycaller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sauk Valley News)
 
 
 
"The man suspected of stealing a 42-inch TV from the Walmart Supercenter Saturday also might be a meat burglar"
source: saukvalley.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 411: "Silhouettes 2: Inanimate Silhouettes". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 20, 2013
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Noted scientist and top Colombian model claims that hormonal chickens are turning children gay
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Never mind March Madness, the beer snobs have one better: Beer Madness
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
"Axe body spray has the same effect as nerve gas"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
No matter how sexist the gender wars get, you'd think nobody would ever have the audacity to straight-up say that women are just "there to be beautiful objects." But then, maybe you don't read "Esquire"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
When you rent your mansion out for reality TV, make sure it isn't for an x-rated show that leaves permanent semen stains on the couch
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this photographic moment
source: media2.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Are these real or fake Cosmo sex tips?
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Looking for a place to illegally dump your asbestos? How about anywhere but in front of a pre-school with CCTV cameras
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Radioactive rat blamed for latest Fukushima power outage. Japanese officials send in radioactive cats to deal with situation, put radioactive dogs on standby
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
The verdict is in: courting the hipster "creative class" only serves to improve the lives of hipsters themselves. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to be at the artisanal cheese chop in 26 minutes
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Who has no legs, two pistols and tried to escape on a hoverround after shooting someone in Wal-Mart? This guy
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Giant camels with extremely large toes once roamed the Arctic
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Is your husband/boyfriend/domestic partner having a problem finding your elusive G-Spot? Well, modern medicine has just the procedure for you. The G-Shot
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Internazionale (Italy))
 
 
 
Photoshop these hopping hotel guides
source: contents.internazionale.it   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
The only thing preventing society from devolving into a post-apocalyptic wasteland of marauding evildoers are some decorative eggs from the Ukraine
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
Another of those consequences nobody ever thinks about. Legalized marijuana means all the drug dogs need to be retrained
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Normally, a routine court appearance by a guy accused of possessing an illegal gun at an airport wouldn't become a buzzy little Internet story, but the guy's name happens to be Barton Simpson and the judge is identified as "Mr. Recorder Burns"
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
As an olive branch to the internet for taking away their Reader, Google just made GIF searches a whole lot easier
source: uproxx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Christian-based American Family Association revives decades-old-rumor that Hillary Clinton is a lesbian
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
After countless hours of research, the most dangerous driving distraction is.......kids
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Partying skinny dipping Spring Breaker told cops they were on a power trip. Cops then demonstrated their power
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Will EA remain reigning champ with its botched release of SimCity? Will Bank of America finally be able to seize the trophy? Will people remember that Carnival literally crapped on its customers? It's your annual Worst Company in America contest
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
NASA to New York: If you see an asteroid hurtling toward Times Square do the following: 1) stop what you are doing, 2) spread your legs, 3) bend over and place your head between your legs, 4) start kissing your butt good bye
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Prosecutor upgrades charges against driver who killed Brooklyn couple after noticing he is really unpopular
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Extreme ice cream craving leads to three felonies
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
"Hey, it's Sunday night. Let's go to the strip club." "Naw, I'm tired." "Aw, c'mon, it will be fun. It's not like we're going to lose our legs or anything"
source: blog.sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(State Journal)
 
 
 
Exotic dancer in West Virginia files suit over payment system. In related news: They have 'Exotic Dancers' in West Virginia
source: statejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
New Zealand's long national nightmare is over as Marmite returns to grocery stores
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
What's the best way to discourage people from withdrawing their own money and creating a run on the banks? Keep the banks closed, perhaps indefinitely, of course. They'll show those depositors
source: worldnews.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Lost tectonic plate found under California---Entire planet found under states of Alabama and Mississippi---and under NYC? Well, you shouldn't look, know what I'm sayin'?
source: zen-haven.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic Wire)
 
 
 
Lulemon: We're very sorry the world can see your bits when you go "down dog" in our yoga pants, the manufacturer farked up and sent us a bad batch with too-thin material. Manufacturer: No this batch is exactly like every other one we've shipped
source: theatlanticwire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Caption what this cat is thinking
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
The US Patent Office thinks that talking to no one in particular is a novel invention
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Vatican Operator, how may I help you? Yes this is Pope Francis and I would like you to connect me to .. Yeah, right mate, if you're the pope I'm bloody Napoleon
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Seriously, who would steal $1,000 worth of Mucinex?
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
What could possibly go wrong?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KAIT Jonesboro)
 
 
 
Police: Attack 'victim' admits whole thing was fabricated just to impress his date
source: kait8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Pentagon bans centuries old weapons technology until they can find a contractor willing to charge more for it
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Just like the peace talks, President Obama's limo stalls out in Israel. Unlike the peace talks, the limo stalled because a Secret Service agent filled it with gasoline
source: politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
When CNN reared its ugly head, she bravely turned her tail and fled. Brave, brave, brave, brave Michelle Bachmann
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Woman who pushed her husband out of a 17th floor window blames break-away glass
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Mark Sanford to face off against Colbert's sister. Thank God I bought stock in Orville Redenbacher
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
One-handed violinist helps other disabled people play music. He doesn't offer much in the way of applause, though
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(ABC News)
 
 
 
Half of all Americans have more credit card debt than savings. The other half are childless
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Beginner's tip: When holding a garage sale, be sure to remove the $2.1 million Chinese bowl
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
Auburn man arrested at gas station after he was caught pumping from the wrong nozzle
source: barrow.patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Bay Area)
 
 
 
ACLU up in arms because students of a California high school were told they could only wear "gender appropriate" clothing for school pictures and prom. Did no one think to just get the guys to wear kilts in protest?
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(WTKR)
 
 
 
Stoner apologizes to parents after getting busted making meth in their home. "It was no Heisenburg operation or nothing like that. It's just simple things that can be put together and done out of a single bottle,"
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(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Wooly Willie
source: 1.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Wisconsin will shut down one of its most popular nude beaches after struggling for years to curtail sex and drugs on the sandbar and surrounding woods. In other news, there are nude beaches in Wisconsin
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
The 911 call that saved Fark from another depressing Florida story and UCF from a mass shooting incident
source: articles.orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
OMG DEFCON 88 NORTH KOREA CYBER ATTACK downgraded to "forgot to update AVG"
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Yo dawg, I heard you like ballerinas so I put a brothel in your ballet so she can grand plié on your grand petard
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 92 FM)
 
 
 
Budget cuts cause more immigrants to be released. Sheriff Arpaio last seen in the fetal position
source: news92fm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Sure, you may have had to walk there uphill, both ways, in the snow, but at least your school wasn't infested with aggressive bats. "They're in the hallways chasing people"
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
Happy Birthday to the best neighbor ever
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
"Massive" cyberattack underway against South Korean banks, broadcast media. Everybody panic. No, seriously, EVERYBODY PANIC
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
VivianVivisect is making cards for vincent_blackshadow. She needs funny pics to print out and include. Post 'em here
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Art or nightmare fuel?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hanford Sentinel)
 
 
 
It's 106 miles to Hanford, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses ... ... hit it
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(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Man hospitalized after falling into toilet pit, had to make doo for 70 minutes until rescuers could get him out
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
To stay safe while on the job, Australian spies are required to wear bright yellow hi-viz clothing while operating under cover. Yes, Mr Bond, I expect you to die. Soon (possible Not safe for work content in sidebar)
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Need a vacation? Company offers two year trip around world for $1.2 million
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TruthDig)
 
 
 
The Last Letter: A Message to George W. Bush and Dick Cheney From a Dying Veteran
source: truthdig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 19, 2013
(CBS Atlanta)
 
 
 
Coca Cola to unveil Fruitwater next month. WARNING: Fruitwater® contains no fruit
source: atlanta.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
If you woke up to what sounded like gunfire in your neighborhood last night, relax. It was just a couple of drunks shooting Roman candles at each other
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Travel + Leisure)
 
 
 
Does feeding stingrays in the Caymans lead to unwanted pregnancy? Steve Irwin unavailable for comment
source: travelandleisure.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
Baltimore resident finds a novel way to fight back against Ticketmaster's insane fees. He uses the law. Fark: He won
source: uproxx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
The University of Arizona has developed an app that gives people a warning when a dust storm is approaching. Just in case that towering wall of dust that blocked out the sun and is rumbling your way isn't enough
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(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Father takes pic of 11-year-old son with gun, social services shows up at his door demanding entry into his home and access to guns or else they will "take his kids"
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(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Injured Marine on active duty ordered to remove artificial legs at airport security checkpoint
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(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: That damned pixel
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(Serious Eats)
 
 
 
Want a steak so good, your dog will murder you in your sleep for it? Here comes the Food Science
source: seriouseats.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phoenix New Times)
 
 
 
Arizona wants to go full "Where birth certifcit whe" on anyone who uses a public restroom
source: blogs.phoenixnewtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HyperVocal)
 
 
 
There's showing no remorse, then there's showing up to court with a "KILLER" T-shirt and flipping off victims' families
source: hypervocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Think you're having a bad day? At least you didn't fall feet-first into a giant tire shredder
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shorpy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this friendly face of fire prevention
source: shorpy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNSNews)
 
 
 
Remember that Colorado sheriff who announced that he will no longer enforce laws he doesn't like? Yeah...about that
source: cnsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
"Voice of Elmo sued over meth-fueled sex parties"
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Detroit)
 
 
 
The new Emergency Financial Manager for Detroit owes $16,000 in back taxes and has two liens on his house, which is pretty good for Detroit
source: detroit.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Activist comes up with media fu tactic against Westboro Baptist Church that is, literally, brilliant
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
"Apart from someone [police] coming around to say someone is trying to kill me, it was a really nice day"
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Would you drink a cup of coffee that had 200% more caffeine than your normal cuppa? If so, here's your "Death Wish" just in case you want to overdose
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Sex, twitter, and math are doing what the Nielsen Family's ratings couldn't; finally make TV smarter
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
How long does war keep costing America? The government is still paying benefits for service in the Civil War
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KnoxNews)
 
 
 
37 year old man dies after van surfing accident, obviously trying to prove the original Teen Wolf was better than the new MTV series. Boof and Stiles unavailable for comment
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(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
The psychic you're seeing might be a fraud if she says she can't remember in what cemetery she buried the $400,000 worth of gold coins you gave her and only Michael the Archangel would know
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(Reuters)
 
 
 
In a case likely to have major implication for those Russian websites selling $0.10 Mp3's, as well as online sellers of used CDs, video games and textbooks the US Supreme Court says the "first sale doctrine" applies to copyrighted works
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South China Morning Post)
 
 
 
US flying B-52s over Korea. Psy last seen mounting up his imaginary cavalry
source: scmp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Chuck E. Cheese, where a kid can be a kid. And an adult can get shot in the leg as he tries to walk out on a $286 bill
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Headline News TV)
 
 
 
Scroll down to the bottom of the article to find out why Tiger Woods and Lindsey Vonn are dating
source: hlntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
The assault on the First Amendment continues as court rules that you can't falsely yell "Bingo" in a crowded bingo hall
source: nky.cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Study finds that when women get a false positive cancer diagnosis from a mammogram, they get upset
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Did Dennis Rodman Just Spill a North Korean Secret?
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(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Step 1: Microwave rice in a sock based on Dr. Oz's recommendation. Step 2: Ignore the warning not to let the socks get too hot, especially since you can't feel your feet due to diabetes. Step 3: ???? Step 4: Sue Dr. Oz after burning your feet
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Ten years ago today was the first day of the Iraq invasion. Farkers debated whether it was a good idea or not. See what we were saying here in the original comment thread from 2003
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(BBC)
 
 
 
Scotland could soon let the words "I love you" and "I know" be official wedding vows
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: my girlfriend kisses and makes out with her cat and it really grosses me out. What should I do?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Eagle Tribune)
 
 
 
Island residents trying to protect houses from ocean decide it is better to ask forgiveness than permission
source: eagletribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Excuse me....I'm just trying to find the bridge.....has anybody seen the bridge? I ain't seen the bridge.......Where's that confounded bridge?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Technology is not always your friend. Fleeing motorcyclist in high-speed chase ID'd by buddy's helmet cam
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
New study published in the Journal of the Cunning Linguist shows that Brazilian waxes increase the spread of viral infection, legs
source: bodyodd.nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
Looking at this wreck, you'd never guess that the woman driving the car was out of the hospital before the tractor-trailer driver even sobered up
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Taiwanese woman divorces husband due to small penis; husband says he did not see it coming
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ads from the 50's make you wonder, How happy can a chubby girl be?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Meanwhile, after a bar fight on St. Patty's day: "An autopsy found a skull fraction on the back of (the victim's) head"
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Love Girl Scout cookies? Love getting drunk? Wouldn't it be great if you could combine those two loves into one awesome beverage?
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Lawmakers think the best way to curb the crime, stupidity, and general idiocy of the most insane state in the Union is legalizing marijuana
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(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
92-year-old Cincinnati woman reunites with gorilla she cared for as a girl, but enough about Donald Trump's grandmother
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
NewsFlash
 
Explosion at Hawthorne Army Depot in Nevada during a Marine training exercise, multiple fatalities reported
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Chicken lays egg containing two yolks... and another egg. EGG-CEPTION
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this teen coming out of a tunnel
source: denverpost.slideshowpro.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
America descends into lawless pandemonium as Lululemon threatens 'shortage' of black yoga pants
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Spy)
 
 
 
Apostrophe ban council reverses decision after being threatened by Farker's
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(Business Insider)
 
 
 
"We're taking Jonesy out of the loop and going completely autonomous"
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(WOWT Omaha)
 
 
 
Is smiling while holding up a t-shirt of a political opponent shown hanging off a stripper pole really considered in poor taste?
source: wowt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
10 years ago today, the U.S.-led invasion of Iraq began and answers once and for all the age old question of "What could possibly go wrong?"
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