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Sun April 29, 2012
(Slate)
 
 
 
Al-Qaida looking to outsource future attacks
source: slatest.slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Photo District News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this high highway
source: pdnphotooftheday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
HOA goes insane, evicts tenants from their homes, then rents out same houses it doesn't even own
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
A real-life Norman Bates has been busted for fraud for dressing up like his dead mother for six years and collecting her benefits. But he doesn't believe he's done anything wrong-because he actually believes he is his mother
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Not wanting to be left out of the fun a teacher's aide has been arrested for sending nude photos to 16 year-old students because she 'enjoyed the attention'. With you'd hit it with your ruler picture
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Greece's Island of the Blind, where taxi drivers, farmers, restaurant owners and shopkeepers are all blind
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Truck spills milk onto Texas interchange. Emergency crews seemed unnaturally stoic
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
News: Frustration with government leads to secession talk. Fark: The Upper Peninsula seceding from Michigan
source: miningjournal.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
There's no middle ground when it comes to Moxie. You love it or you hate it. Oh, and the new logo was designed by a teenager
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
London council to residents: "Thanks for all your complaints about drug addicts causing problems. Due to an administrative error we have given your names and phone numbers to the drug addicts....we're good though, right?"
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready intro: A double killer who had a sex swap and was moved to a women's jail is divorcing the lesbian murderess he wed behind bars
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Stop me if you've heard this one before: An elephant, a lion, and a tiger walked onto a highway
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Calgary Herald)
 
 
 
Canadian sci-fi convention announces entire cast of Star Trek TNG as guests. C) Too many nerds turn up, failarity ensues
source: calgaryherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
A small number of surviving veterans marked the 68th anniversary of the Anzio beach landing in Italy aboard the USS Mahan. Let's take a minute to salute what they've done before these 90-somethings are all gone
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Spray on tan. New and hot: Roll on tan
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Council tells woman with twins who haven't been separated since birth to take them to different schools two miles apart...even though she has no car
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UW Madison)
 
 
 
A live webcam of the cutest Red-Tailed Hawk babies that you'll see all week
source: metobs.ssec.wisc.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop this car designed with pumps in mind
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Chin implants the latest must-have for U.S teen girls wanting to make an impact on prom night
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV)
 
 
 
Drug company releases powerful new antibiotic to treat the Plague. This is not a repeat from 1348 when it would have been more helpful
source: ctv.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Scientists discover that power is as addictive as cocaine, but harder to grind up and snort
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live Science)
 
 
 
Wiffle Balls are almost 60 years old, and you still shouldn't squeeze them
source: livescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
What does God sound like? Evidently a cross between Spock, King Jaffe Joffer, and Pee-Wee Herman (with helpful illustration)
source: religion.blogs.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Celebrate the Hubble Space Telescope turning 22 with this amazing gallery of pictures it has taken over the years
source: blog.seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Just so you know. THIS is a Beerfest
source: sfbeerfest.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
O RLY?
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCTI 12 New Bern)
 
 
 
15-year-old has to wear two-sided sign that reads, "I have a bad attitude. I disrespect people who try to help me"
source: wcti12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Good news: Eight mayors band together to publicly compare the ban on marijuana in the United States to Prohibition. Bad news: They're not mayors in the United States
source: blog.seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
British woman of 104 jumps 2,400ft off a mountain...just to irritate a competitive 101-year-old American
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(940 WINZ)
 
 
 
Dumb: Demanding to get off plane to find your lost wallet. Dumber: Arguing with flight personnel and getting removed from the plane. Fark: Your wallet turns up in Chicago on the plane you were removed from
source: 940winz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier Mail)
 
 
 
One of these things is not like the others, one of these things just doesn't belong. Can you tell which thing is not like the others, by the time I finish my song?
source: couriermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
It's 5 a.m. and you've had one too many. The logical thing to do is: A) Drink some water and go to bed. B) Eat some greasy eggs and go to bed. C) Knock on your neighbor's door naked
source: palmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
ᴴᵉᴵᵎᵁᵐ ᴾᴿᵎᶜᵉᵌ ᵁᴾ
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these light waves
source: payload43.cargocollective.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Ahh doppelbock: The high-maintenance girlfriend of beers
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Area man discovers that when investing in the Franklin Mint 401(k), past performance is not indicative of future results
source: heraldnews.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
The US Navy is considered the master of six oceans. But Russia, Canada, and Demark have the upper hand in the seventh
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Yo dog, we heard you like blind dogs, so we gave your dog a seeing eye dog
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Free Press)
 
 
 
Man startles cat, knife fight ensues
source: lfpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sustainable Development Policy)
 
 
 
Miss New Hampshire USA, living free and kicking the crap out of her boyfriend: Mugshot Goodness
source: 967thewave.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Opera glasses used by Abraham Lincoln at Ford's Theater could bring $700,000. Auction house desperately hoping someone will take a shot at it
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Jury finds that cop who beat up a legally blind doctor, from behind and without provocation, is a total prick. Bonus: police internal affairs cleared the cop and recommend the man be charged after defending himself
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Old-and-busted: John Titor. New hotness: Seattle attorney Andrew Basiago. Famous photo shows him as a child at the Gettysburg Address
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Give up for a week: Sex, Internet, or Booze?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
When robbing a store for diapers and beer, be advised that some cab drivers will NOT drive you on your getaway (with Son, you got a panty on your head picture goodness)
source: salem-nh.patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HelenaIR.com)
 
 
 
Cockatiel escapes home and gets blown miles away in high wind, but skilled bird dog on the scent retrieves it and reunites it with family
source: helenair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat April 28, 2012
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
How NOT to get out of a speeding ticket: Flash a fake badge at the police officer and tell him "You're in trouble"
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
At least one dead and a hundred injured in beer garden tent collapse in St Louis
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Swan porn? That'll be a bestiality charge
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Woman's first hang gliding experience turns into her last skydiving experience
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFAA Fort Worth)
 
 
 
Leaders of an insular religious commune are under investigation by authorities for extensive child abuse... in Waco. This is not a repeat from 1993
source: wfaa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times Photos)
 
 
 
Photoshop this stage setup
source: latimesphoto.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
A brief history of international signs
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Norwich Bulletin)
 
 
 
After being turned down applying for grant, saucy eight year old uses her noodle and raises enough money to deliver 20 homemade lasagnas to the local soup kitchen. Garfield smiles, pushes Odie off the table
source: norwichbulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitchy)
 
 
 
Piers Morgan: Americans don't know what a 'wanker' is; Americans: thanks for demonstrating
source: twitchy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
The fact that the Republican National Convention is being held in one of the top 5 strip club cities in the country is just a coincidence....seriously
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times Photos)
 
 
 
Photoshop this giant girl and dog
source: latimesphoto.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man busted for parking his truck on the side of the road to sell seafood and regular, strawberry, blackberry and apple-flavored moonshine. Why yes, this did happen in Florida
source: weblogs.sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Governator pulled over for speeding; caption this conversation
source: i.dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
1. Date a young female dentist. 2. Dump her for another woman. 3. Show up at her office two days later for oral surgery. 4. Mrrrmphglglh
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Memo to Secret Service agents: no more drinking alcohol within 10 hours of working; no bringing foreigners to your hotel rooms; and, no going to "non-reputable" establishments
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Walmart unveils a revolutionary new way to pay for online purchases, using specially printed slips of green paper, or as they call it, "cash"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The world fears being plunged into anarchy and chaos as the Prince of Lichtenstein threatens to step down. Yeah, so, apparently Lichtenstein has a prince, who knew?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Parents warned about dangers of upper-floor windows -- as apparently people these days are too stupid to understand the gravity of the situation
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
You never know what to expect when you discover your crazy ex-girlfriend has sneaked into your backyard to drink and tan by your pool
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Day)
 
 
 
Animal control officers discover rare Arrowhead goose in CT
source: theday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Student uses cell phone camera to document important high school events: Homecoming dance, Senior prom, ex-principal passionately kissing ex-school secretary
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
There's caring for the environment and then there's eating fish you raised inside your New York City apartment
source: asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier Mail)
 
 
 
Nothing gives you confidence in the electoral process quite like being handed a scrap of paper to write your vote on because they ran out of ballot papers
source: couriermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier Mail)
 
 
 
For just $50,000 you can purchase a $195 million ship from the Defense Department. But there's just one catch: As soon as you buy it you have to dismantle it on US soil
source: couriermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
Another grueling night for police in the Westchester suburbs: "3:58 a.m. - A dispute between neighbors was reported on Schrade Road. Police reported one neighbor was complaining the other was snoring too loud"
source: pleasantville.patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Photo District News)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Bigger isn't always better
source: pdnphotooftheday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
We're not saying the lottery is rigged, but one convenience store in Phoenix sold six winning tickets this week, each worth 1-million dollars. "This is definitely a unique situation"
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
The duck is NOT crazy. The guy who uses it as an umbrella? He's quackers
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South Florida News-Press)
 
 
 
"Walmart has its greeters, we have our cats". A heart-warming story of a tiny island community coming together to help homeless felines, just in time for Caturday
source: news-press.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Bullied children are more prone to self-harm, says new study from the Stop Hitting Yourself Institute
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
If you get caught secretly filming your hot neighbor in the bathroom, own up to your actions. Don't blame it on an imaginary nephew named Aaron
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Mother of the Year candidate has seventh child taken away by health services, admits to using cocaine, marijuana and alcohol every day during latest pregnancy (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Blind Chinese prisoner Chen Guangcheng escapes house arrest, apparently going unnoticed by pulling fire alarm while his captors ran in circles
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
KFC's Twister Wrap contains a secret blend of 12 herbs and spices, one of which will paralyze you for life
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
You're the founder of the "It Gets Better" campaign and delivering an anti-bullying speech. Do you: C) call the Christian teens in attendance "pansy asses" and mock them for walking out of your tirade?
source: radio.foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Dangerous terrorist breaches security at New Jersey airport. Terminal shut down for over an hour. Suspect last seen sucking on a pacifier and napping
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Teacher arrested after losing his iPad in a Wal-Mart. Apparently, the iPad had all his videos of 8th grade girls changing in the locker room
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 27, 2012
(Wired)
 
 
 
This doesn't get weird; it starts weird, and gets weirder
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
The US is quietly positioning a lot of stealth aircraft near Iran. October surprise anyone?
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
You lookin' at me crooked? Must be the Mugshot Roundup
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Would-be vending machine thieves, who've simultaneously watched too much and not enough CSI, torch building to destroy evidence of their failed burglary, then call 911 to report the fire
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFAA Fort Worth)
 
 
 
Defective sippy cups recalled by Target after kids discover they're pokey cups. (PIC)
source: wfaa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Best Korean parade honoring country's founder is visible from space
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Prison officials propose law to label masturbating inmates as sex offenders, opponents say either way it would be tossed
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this colourful chap
source: i.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 10 ABC Sacramento)
 
 
 
Obiwan Kenobi arrested for hit and run, claims he is not the driver they are looking for
source: news10.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Paramedics: Boasting on Facebook you saved the life of a young woman is good. Boasting that you managed to cop a feel while doing so is bad
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Meth lab explodes in man's pants
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Check calendar. Note that it's Friday. Clear desk. Take Fark Weird News Quiz
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these drunken revellers
source: kirus.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Of the $200,000 in donations George Zimmerman raised from his website, he's already blown through $50,000 of it on "living expenses, rent or whatever"
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
I can't wait until the economy picks up so you people can find jobs and quit posting troll threads. That should be reason enough to vote Romney, no matter how you feel about our dog-eating POTUS
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
My dog napped and ate all day; this dog fought off a robber and called the police
source: lifewithdogs.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 95.7 Halifax)
 
 
 
Canadian soldiers no longer to stand at attention
source: news957.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Calm down everybody. There's no proof that Egyptians are actually considering a law to allow husbands to engage in necrophilia with their dead wives in order to raise an army of zombie concubines
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Chicago)
 
 
 
Man earns dubious reputation as fastest lover in Illinois
source: myfoxchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Twenty years after the Rodney King riots, Battlestar Galactica's Bill Adama chimes on racial relations in LA, destroying those frackin toasters
source: usnews.msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Once, we as a society respected great leaders and thinkers like Thomas Edison, Marie Curie, Teddy Roosevelt, and Margaret Thatcher. Now, we glorify Kim Kardashian and Justin Bieber. What happened?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
What do a bikini, a Domino's pizza, Mountain Dew pajamas, a baseball glove, and Pokémon trading cards have in common? Play TSG's 'match the shoplifter with the item they attempted to steal' and find out
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
In the wake of the Secret Service prostitute scandal, Colombia has plenty of laughs mocking the US for the incident. That is, of course, until a US airline advertisement associates Colombia with prostitution. Now it's not funny anymore
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Wondering why that cute video you posted of your kid dancing in a diaper is getting so many views on Youtube? It's been added to a kiddie porn site
source: 1035superx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Men charged with stealing thousands of dollars worth of printer ink. Police say both cartridges were successfully recovered
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Chaos)
 
 
 
Had Hitler tried to escape Germany at the end of WWII, British intelligence feared he might disguise himself as Jeffrey Tambor
source: iheartchaos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Hot teacher wants to be fruitful and multiply, forgoes the bang-a-student route and instead pursues IVF with her husband. Ends up fired by her Catholic employer. Bonus points: still hot. Lightning round: suing the diocese. (tag for the employer)
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Voice of America)
 
 
 
US, Japan Reach Agreement to Move 9,000 Marines. Defense of Okinawa will now be done by Mr. Miyagi's rival Mr. Sato, and his nephew Chozen
source: voanews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Two words: Jumbo shrimp
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
The Swedes have not kept very tight controls over their plutonium, even selling it to a wild-haired scientist for some spare pinball machine parts
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
And the newest media-created word guaranteed to make you punch the first person you hear using it? "Mompreneur"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Finders, keepers / Losers, weepers.... as long as there's no security camera
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
When you absolutely, positively have to be the world's most badass leader, accept no substitute
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Tide detergent not only uses its fast-acting chemicals to get that stain off your shirt -- It makes a new one in your spleen
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(970 WFLA)
 
 
 
Driver finds iconic 26-foot-tall statue unavoidable, crashes into it. Guess where
source: 970wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Bear shot from the sky while flying past University of Colorado campus
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Map of the world's death traps. And all they can say about the US is "lawnmower"?
source: static.bbci.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Wat Rong Khun, a Buddhist temple under construction is poised to become one of the most stunningly beautiful in the world, rich with symbolism derived from Buddhist and Hindu traditions, including: Superman, Batman, and Neo from The Matrix
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Take away a 15 year old's cellphone? That's a Teen Sledgehammer Rampage. You just read that in Don LaFontaine's voice
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
50 years ago co-pilot Major Ron Salt helped lift the new 80-foot spire onto Coventry cathedral after it had been destroyed by the Luftwaffe. This morning he climbed back up there to check out his handiwork
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Dude, I'm sorry I stabbed your son. Tell you what, why don't you stab me and we'll call it even, deal?
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Today's iron photoshop ingredient: Paranoia
source: 26.media.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
EuroFark Party, Prague, April 27-28
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Netherlands judge to decide whether foreign tourists should be banned from entering cannabis cafes. NOOOOOOO
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Man with home-made bomb threatens to blow himself up in central London
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Parents, pay attention, this is how you take photos of your kids
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Henry Rollins: "There's no better time than now to have a moral and civic backbone. This is a tremendous opportunity for you...to be heroic"
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Dumb: Getting drunk and picking up a prostitute. Dumber: Passing out in a hotel room in the company of prostitute. Dumbest: Passing out in the company of a prostitute while in possession of $500K worth of diamonds
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Man attacks power company worker with medieval-style weapon. FLAIL
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Russian Paratroopers will meet up with American Forces next month for a joint military exercise in Colorado. WOLVERINES
source: articles.businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Prosecutors set up mock "Hunger Games" trial with first graders to highlight the issues with Stand Your Ground laws
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Seventy-three-year-old man drills into WWII-era 20mm cannon shell to make a lamp. Hilarity explodes
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Parents sue because their snowflake was kicked out of an honors English class after he was caught cheating. Fark: He had signed an Academy Honesty Pledge which warned that cheating was grounds for immediate removal from the class
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Professor uses 35 years of medical research to show that it's okay to have sexy time with your cousin
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Luis Obispo Tribune)
 
 
 
"Jellyfish-like creatures" take over intake structure and shut down Diablo Canyon nuclear power plant. And so it begins
source: sanluisobispo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"Sorry, you can't speak at our graduation ceremony because you're gay"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 26, 2012
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
"Welcome to Fazoli's, would you like to try our lasagna with spiders?"
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Nebraska assistant football coach: it would be an "honor" to be fired for anti-gay views
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
A pest-removal company may have accidentally sealed a squirrel in your attic and it died. Do you: A) Demand they remove the carcass? B) Hire another company to remove it? C) Sue them for $112,000?
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Man attacks woman with couch. That is sofa king weird
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
What do you mean, I can't have "F.Osama" license plates. You don't want me offending the dead guy? F.That
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
Emergency crews quarantine Delta flight at Chicago's Midway Airport over passenger with "contagious disease." EVERYBODY PANIC (and put your tray-tables in the upright position)
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Modesto Bee)
 
 
 
1917: Eight year old boy named William Lawlis Pace gets shot in the head. 2012: Pace dies in his sleep at age 103 with the bullet still in place, setting a world record
source: modbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Lesbian? Lebanese? It's close enough for CBS
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Shipping)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mailing wall
source: christian-stoll.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Hope you enjoyed that mild winter as you and your pets get infested with a record number of ticks, fleas, and mosquitoes this summer
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Laughing Squid)
 
 
 
Let's say you worked at Sesame Street and realized that the walls were actually big chalk boards. You'd probably do this, too
source: laughingsquid.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Late night debt collection calls. New Hotness: Debt collectors in emergency rooms. Why, yes- there IS a lawsuit already pending
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this achromatic airship
source: christian-stoll.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Fleeing DUI suspect's crappy excuse to cops: '"I had the runs"
source: weblogs.sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Welcome to Walmart. May I help you steal some televisions?
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
You can patent your pasta shapes. And 2,000 shapes already have been patented
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Craigslist)
 
 
 
World's strangest job opportunity: Dream Stenographer / Lucid Dreaming Partner
source: seattle.craigslist.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Nutella settles court case and acknowledges it's not a health food, nor is it really truly edible
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Really, who doesn't enjoy farewell intercourse?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inland Valley Daily Bulletin)
 
 
 
Shopping List 1.) eggs 2.) butter 3.) knock off that US Bank in the lobby: "I think he's robbed every day but Sunday and Friday"
source: dailybulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Bigfoot, Nessie, UFOs and Ghosts are just a few of the "hunts" that travelers can join in. "I do think there's a Squatch in these woods"
source: travel.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Two men on their way to work arrested for having an arsenal of weapons and cash in their car. Their job? Tutors at a middle school
source: northescambia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
Not News: Man runs over mailbox. News: Of 10 different neighbors, on multiple occasions. Fark: "I didn't know it was illegal"
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Want to be massaged by snakes or elephants? It is among the six "Luxury" Spa Treatments For The Extremely Rich & Insane
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charlotte Observer)
 
 
 
New high score set for speed on highway to hell: Convicted sex offender sent to prison for stealing video games from a children's cancer ward
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
Weirdest story you will read all day about a woman who huffed a fruit seed back in 1984 and coughed it back up yesterday. With pic
source: theheights.wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Foreign Policy)
 
 
 
Want world peace? ... better treat your women right
source: foreignpolicy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 46 Atlanta)
 
 
 
Old and busted: House flipping. New and disturbing: Dog flipping
source: cbsatlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Myrtle Beach Online)
 
 
 
Someone breaks into woman's apartment, steals movie and eats her doughnut. Cop said the burglar did her a favor since it was a Tyler Perry movie that was stolen, but they will definitely be investigating the missing doughnut
source: myrtlebeachonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(City Journal)
 
 
 
Fark's favorite state reverses its demographic decline, proving PT Barnum was right after all
source: city-journal.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
Even in a first-degree murder case, everyone is presumed innocent until proven guilty. But you're not helping things if you're the one arrested and you have a tattoo of a gun between your eyebrows
source: palmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WISHTV)
 
 
 
Dairy cow escapes. Last seen ordering Happy Meal at the drive through
source: wishtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Morning wood can be fatal
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRCB)
 
 
 
Apparently that whole "leap from the car seconds before it crashes and bursts into flames" thing happens in real life, too. Even more amazingly, the leaper only suffered minor injuries and will be fine
source: wrcbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
The Catholic priest who kept his cancer secret and gave a moving sermon about life on Easter Sunday has died at age 66
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Woman who tried to exclusively live off sunlight has ridden off into the sunset
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Thoughts of bordellos has tongues wagging, businesses lining up for get some. Stiff opposition expected from the usual jagoffs
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
How do Norwegians send an extra-special Fark You to a mass-murdering psychopath? Forty thousand of them marched to Oslo singing the song he claims is an example of Marxist indoctrination
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Meet the mother and her then unborn daughter who were treated like a King 20 years ago in Los Angeles
source: usnews.msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Photographer: Oops, was that your 2,630-year-old sculpture. Manhattan art collector: No need to apologize, you bought it
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bonner County Daily Bee)
 
 
 
Good Idea: Listen to your old Thriller album when you're missing Michael. Bad Idea: Hold someone at gunpoint and force them to moonwalk
source: bonnercountydailybee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
The Farktographers made the mistake of letting you pick what they shoot in the upcoming Scavenger Hunt theme. Details in first post. LGT Farktography discussion thread
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DFW Star-Telegram)
 
 
 
Prom for home-schooled teens included night of life sized chess and barefooted sword fighting, many awkward moments of realizing other teens exist outside of television and internet
source: star-telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
A 13 yr. old is on the sex offenders list ....for surfing porn on the internet
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Tennessee baseball player hits game-winning home run, simultaneously incurs higher insurance rates
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Speed cameras now have lasers that can target individual cars. So don't be surprised if the car passing you suddenly explodes
source: au.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PJ Media)
 
 
 
U of Florida backs off on plans to ditch computer science department on news that they're the only school where nerds and hot cheerleaders exist on the same campus
source: pjmedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
New entry in Worst. Boyfriend. Ever competition: hamster-stomping douchebag
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Neighborhood activist who protested the most about vandalism arrested for slashing tires
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
When collecting a $12 debt for a haircut, soliciting help from the Leader of the Free World may be a bit of overkill
source: blogs.tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Welcome to the world's first luxury dental spa, where you can get bridgework and a massage all in the same place. See, do this and people might enjoy coming to the dentist
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"It was horrific - she came around to say sorry and ended up trying to bite my penis off"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Drew?
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Arizona migrant case could lead to sweeping changes. Also dishwashing changes, landscaping changes, and nanny changes
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Best Korea unveils glorious new mobile missiles that are absolutely, positively, definitely NOT phony mockups pieced together from various other systems and stuck on a random launch vehicle
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this kid keeping cool
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Charles Taylor convicted at the Hague for war crimes, aiding and abetting hipsters
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KGW Portland)
 
 
 
Instruments stolen from band bus. Authorities warn that the suspects may be prone to violins
source: kgw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
You still have the right to run through the streets naked and high on meth without being charged with a crime. USA USA USA
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
New Zealand postal service laughs at US Postal Service's feeble attempt to go to five day a week service, says three days a week sounds about right
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Worst. Boyfriend. EVER. (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
ProTip #1: After burgling a home, do not call the owner the next day offering to come over and trade your swag. For ProTip #2,3 RTFA
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Elephant forgets to not crush zookeeper
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Hottie proves the even kidneys can be recycled (w/pic)
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
In honor of National Grilled Cheese Month, here are the meltability indexes for your favorite cheeses
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 364: "Off Kilter". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 25, 2012
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
It turns out that when you join the military, there are limits on both your speech and your personal freedom to make choices. Who knew?
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WUSA9)
 
 
 
Speed Camera Vandal becoming folk hero in DC
source: on.wusa9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Woman who won $10 million settlement against a collections agency having trouble collecting her money from them
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Not news: Americans solicit prostitute while traveling abroad. News: They're government officials and broke her collar bone after refusing to pay the agreed price. Fark: This isn't part of the Secret Service fiasco
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Grieving father invents device to communicate with his dead daughter, claims it works great unless you cross the streams
source: now.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Thanks to tougher indoor smoking rules smokers are setting buildings on fire from the outside
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Borg: 'United States losing its global influence.' Resistance is futile
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
"Artist" constructs life-size mummy out of McDonald's food to make a point about modern society, or something
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Oh...my...GOD. YES PLEASE
source: shine.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Weekly)
 
 
 
The original Southern California Darts Association hits the mark with a Federal injunction preventing Dino "Pebbles" Zaffina from using their 30 year old trademark
source: blogs.laweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Evansville Courier Press)
 
 
 
BMW: The Ultimate Driving Your Elderly Mother Off a Cliff Machine
source: courierpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
North Korea has powerful weapon that can defeat US with a single blow. Bubble solution said to be almost ready for launch
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Marathon runner stops 800 yards from the finish line to propose to his girlfriend. You know, he could have done all that without the running
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Facebook comments trigger 30 woman donnybrook in the street
source: sacramento.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Ibex you can photoshop this
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Fox & Friends wonder why President Obama didn't "soft rock" the news instead
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Some of the Secret Service Agents did not have sex with the hookers because they were too drunk. Also, Secret Service Agents on Bill Clinton's detail went to a Brazilian strip club, though that was part of their protective duties
source: tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Mother leaves kids to play bingo, will C-6 months in jail
source: blog.chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Pakistan successfully tests Hatf-IV Shaneen ballistic missile, which translates to 'this one actually flies' in North Korean
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Owner abandons a million dollar Ferrari Enzo in Dubai rather than paying the fines
source: autos.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop these rays in Spain
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS DC)
 
 
 
Family misses flight after TSA agents have an aggressive grope with their 7-year-old daughter. Bonus: The would-be terrorist has cerebral palsy
source: washington.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Oh, The Asshats You'll Meet
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Prom date drops out at the last minute? No prom for you
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
New coffee shop featuring A, B, and C cup sizes and female workers in low-cut tops, is proving to be a big hit with customers
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Funny thing to do to your Sims, No. 1,837: Set fire to all the guests at their wedding
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Obama's lawyer farks up his argument to the Supreme Court against Arizona's immigration law so badly--even Justice Sotomayor isn't buying it
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Goodwill wants to thank everyone for their recent donations but would like to point out that they cannot accept used bongs due to sanitary regulations
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Suddenly, tiny bananas
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLBT Jackson)
 
 
 
Good: School board member encourages reading. Awesome: Of Playboy
source: wlbt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WXYZ Detroit)
 
 
 
The newest sensation sweeping the nation? Mom proms
source: wxyz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Remember that 3.9 quake that hit California the other day that no one really worried about? Um, yeah, about that
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
18 Images you won't believe aren't photoshopped
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Morons)
 
 
 
Ad for life-saving EpiPen pulled from air after outraged parents of children with food allergies protest that it makes them look like bad parents. Because I'd rather my child die than suffer the embarrassment of being considered a bad parent
source: blogs.babycenter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
President Obama wandered into a college bar in Boulder, Colorado last night and this picture happened
source: uproxx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Charlie Sheen's porn star ex offers free breast exam bus. What a country
source: now.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
If you have to headbutt your girlfriend and run out of your house in your underwear in the middle of the night so she won't have sex with you, then it might be time to move on
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Random woman mistakenly invited to dine with government ministers. Fark: she's allowed to stay
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Despite owning £20,000 of women's designer clothing, friends of "body in a sportsbag" MI6 agent claim he was not a mince spy
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier Mail)
 
 
 
Sure, you say you love your dog. But would you get locked into an epic tug-of-war with an eagle to protect it?
source: couriermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click2Houston)
 
Video
 
Man peeping at a showering 14 yr old girl gets caught. By the girl's father. With a mugshot that shows how fathers tend to feel about that sort of thing
source: click2houston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
If you are going to brandish a weapon in a road rage, don't use a flare gun. And try not to shoot it off in your own vehicle. Especially if you have a kid sitting in there
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
All porno movies produced in Simi Valley must now be reviewed by city's police department to ensure proper condom use. Breathless, sweaty detectives promise to put in as many hours as it takes to service protection
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
World Hide and Seek champion may still be alive
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
Boyfriend fakes his own abduction to hide his cheating. It's so crazy it might just work. (No)
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
A classic case of not thinking your clever plan all the way through
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chronicle Herald)
 
 
 
News: Man fights with medical insurance over the bill for his hysterectomy. Fark: A Canadian man...wait, what?
source: thechronicleherald.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
When life gives you lemons make lemonade. When life gives you a kebab, use it to stem the flow of blood from your neck
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News9 Oklahoma)
 
 
 
Woman is outraged over high electric bill and threatens to blow up the power company. Fark: The bill is only $14
source: news9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Proof yet again that Obama is the Anti-Clinton: Young woman spills her yogurt on Obama
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Athens Banner Herald)
 
 
 
Sooo, evidently you CAN'T just lock your mother-in-law in the basement with your 20 cats. Even if she is too senile to know. Be right back
source: onlineathens.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRCB)
 
 
 
Side effect of all those foreclosed and abandoned homes? Millions and millions of hungry, blood-sucking parasites. And along with bankers, there are a lot of mosquitoes, too
source: wrcbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Mexican drug cartel assassin lived in a wretched hive of scum and villainy: Sandusky, Ohio
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Bodega clerk arrested after refusing to sell booze to a minor
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox Sports)
 
 
 
Bob?
source: msn.foxsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Girl makes prom dress out of corrugated cardboard. For previous proms, she's worn dresses she made from soda can pull-tabs and empty Doritos packets. And, yes, you should have a seat over there
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The sea was angry that day my friends
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this space case
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SF Weekly)
 
 
 
Judge rules that you can't pay someone to masturbate in Utah, a state that I didn't even know had emissions standards
source: blogs.sfweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Defamed by an anonymous poster on a forum? Profit
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Your Fourth Wife Flies Free
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Police officer crashes his patrol car, drives away, then calls dispatch because he can't change a tire. That's when his fellow officer saw the pot and meth
source: blogs.desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Study: Dieting makes you fat
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
New Yorkers complaining about too many people having sex in their cars (with a helpful picture of what people having sex in a car may look like)
source: now.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 8000 La Crosse)
 
 
 
Maul of America
source: news8000.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KnoxNews)
 
 
 
A poorly conceived Tennessee law is likely to lead to the miscarriage of justice
source: knoxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
It's not bullying when teachers do it, right? Bonus: autism. Super secret bonus: audio
source: shine.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 24, 2012
(UPI)
 
 
 
Bears repeating
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Attacker beats man to death with guitar, frets
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Fake Dunkin' Donuts auditor arrested. I couldn't think of a cruller fate
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHDH Boston)
 
 
 
Lizzie Borden's house is for sale. Put in a bid before it's too late - chop, chop
source: www1.whdh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CF News 13)
 
 
 
Two men arrested for trying to steal soda machine, will be sent to Pound-Me-in-the-Can Prison
source: cfnews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Judge texts shirtless photo to bailiff. It's just like "Night Court," but without the laughtrack
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Photo District News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this light and shadow
source: pdnphotooftheday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Russia sends R.S.V.P. reply for gracious invitation to summer mega-party "IranSlam 2012". All are reminded it's BYOB
source: articles.businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Sometimes, you're on the road when trucks spill money or marshmallows. Other times, you're on the road when trucks spill sulfuric acid
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Worried that there may still be a few women voters siding with the GOP, Rush Limbaugh launches a new attack on Sandra Fluke
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ledger-Enquirer)
 
 
 
Sheriff opens special housing unit in his jail just for military veterans to ensure that they get the PTSD and other mental health treatment that they desperately need. Tag is for Sheriff and Veterans
source: ledger-enquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The best way to mark the Queen's 60 years on the throne is with. A) A huge party. B) A statue. C) A commemorative can of beans
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
USDA: That cow? oh she mad
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: "When I was your age"
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
As if cruise ships weren't torture enough, 'Saw' movie cruise set for summer
source: travel.usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WISHTV)
 
 
 
Police would like to remind people searching a major highway for money that "finders keepers" doesn't apply when the cash was stolen from a bank
source: wishtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Duluth News Tribune)
 
 
 
Here's what will NOT get you fired from the Fargo, N.D., Police Department: a) Having sex with a teenager in your squad car, and b) leaving your squad car unlocked, allowing a thief to steal handcuffs, Taser, ammo and bulletproof vest
source: duluthnewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Why do we yell "Geronimo" when jumping out of things? Here's the answer -- and besides, yelling "Custer" does not have the same poetic ring
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Man spends 15 years in jail that was originally a 3 year sentence because.....c) his father would not pardon him "until he is proven to be righteous by his father"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
A lab mix works to help thatch the woof
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical Xpress)
 
 
 
Chroniccocaineuseleads to accelerated aging of the b r a i n
source: medicalxpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
When you're on the run for killing an armored truck guard and stealing $2 million, don't brag about it in a crack house, especially in, well, take a wild guess
source: cbspittsburgh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Shaky ceasefire holds in Syrian city of Hama, if by 'shaky' you mean attacking neighborhoods with tanks, mortar fire and artillery
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
New fashions solve dilemma of where to hide the gun
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Murderer Joran van der Sloot to be dragged back to the U.S. to face charges in the disappearance of Natalee Holloway thanks to Peruvian authorities
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Man shoots self, wife at gun safety class
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Ineluctable solipsists grue over the modality of sesquipedalian argot
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Turns out that mystery plane found in abandoned airport field belongs to a 74 year old ex-smuggler who made a midnight belly landing in a driving rain storm and forgot to tell anyone
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Deep down in places you don't talk about you know. You want the Department of Homeland Security on that wall. YOU NEED THEM ON THAT WALL. Protecting us from counterfeit NFL jerseys
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
And a round of applause for Pizza Hut who have truly created the most disgustingly brilliant thing ever. Again
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Neuter)
 
 
 
Common: Parking lot dispute settled by a fight. Not common: To the death. Fark: By "squeezing his testicles"
source: arbroath.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Planking. New teen stupidness: Skywalking
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Working in a brewery must be pretty cool. Except for the exploding kegs, of course
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(610 WIOD)
 
 
 
Tweet: "I still got a warrant in Pearland...Those pigs will never catch me!!!NEVER!" lands woman in the #
source: wiod.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WISTV)
 
 
 
Smoking hot wife and lawyer husband watched too many "naughty baby sitter" vids and rape the sitter. Wife still on the loose and is wanted by cops, Vivid Video
source: wistv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 46 Atlanta)
 
 
 
Apparently needs to be said: Take Your Daughter To Work Day does not apply to burglars
source: cbsatlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
Owners throw $5000 wedding for dogs. Bride still a complete biatch (w/video)
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Welcome to McDonald's, would you like to beat my ass?
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
My hovercraft is empty and the Queen has no pie
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STV.tv)
 
 
 
Boring OR forges international link of tedium with Dull, Scotland
source: news.stv.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Detroit)
 
 
 
Man accused of raping four prostitutes in Pontiac. Subby is guessing it wasn't a Fiero
source: myfoxdetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Captain's Log, stardate 424.12. Weather permitting, this is the final cruise of the Space Shuttle Enterprise. This ship and her history will shortly become the care of the Intrepid Sea, Space and Air Museum in Manhattan
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(EFF)
 
 
 
Want to know if you are being surveilled by a government drone? Here is a handy map of the places using drones in the U.S. Don't forget to wave...one finger at a time
source: eff.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPTV)
 
 
 
Self-described prophet breaks glass, rips out TVs, destroys Jeep, and writes 'Fear God' in his own blood. Don't blame the Devil for this one
source: wptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
The funniest and worst "Glamour shots" you'll ever see
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Kazakhstan tourism booming thanks to Borat. No mention if they are coming to make sexy time
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Veterans returning from Afghanistan drive like everybody is out to kill them, and it shows
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
And oh how they bounced, the little children of Stonehenge
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Ladies and gentleman, fellow conspiracy theorists, let's all give a warm welcome to the latest target for our government obsessions: the brand new Defense Clandestine Service
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
And this is what the streets on NYC look like AFTER the garbage truck comes through
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Iron Photoshop ingredient: The Eye of Sauron
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
The other mouse that roared
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
As the Pope turns 85 the question is raised "what DO you get for the man who already has the Sistine Chapel?"
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Tonight's newscast at WNEP in Scranton was interrupted by.. BEARS (video)
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ugly ass baby kangaroo asks its mom: "You mean I'm gonna stay this color?"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WIVB)
 
 
 
Not News: Man finds a ball on an Alaskan beach. News: With the name of Japanese boy on it. Fark: His wife is Japanese. Ultrafark: They contact the boy who lost everything in the tsunami, and arrange to have the ball sent back. Holyfark: Twice
source: wivb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(OneNewsNow.com)
 
 
 
Removing a Bible from a hotel room = Christians won't be able to read a Bible at night = Christians losing religious freedom. Got it
source: onenewsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Grandad kills three-foot-long swamp beaver (w/horrifying three-foot-long swamp beaver pic)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
If you're trying to trick Planned Parenthood using phony pregnant women seeking gender-based abortions, they're on to you
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Some of the coolest yet saddest pictures of life in the Appalachians you will see today
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 23, 2012
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Dog adopts piglet. The Sun is there
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
The Heart Attack Grill claims its second victim. Someone should open more of these, they are clearly helping chlorinate the gene pool
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orange County Register)
 
 
 
Remember when everyone in LA stayed home one weekend nine months ago because of 'Carmageddon?' All the women about to give birth there sure do
source: ocregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Q13 Fox)
 
 
 
Aside from the seven-month winters, douchebag cyclists, crappy interstate, useless sports teams, liberal politics and water, Seattle is pretty popular
source: q13fox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Four year old hugs her grandma and then gets an extra special hug from the TSA
source: exm.nr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Murder suspect killed by passenger train. See, mass transit is good for something after all
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Foodbeast)
 
 
 
Because Bud Light needed a new flavor that was between feminine and Don Draper's wife
source: foodbeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Local)
 
 
 
Nine-year-old boy catches shark. Worst Jaws sequel EVER
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Hugh Hefner decides to take a stand against the GOP's war on sex
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Park Rapids Enterprise)
 
 
 
Yes, you would hit it. After your stab wounds healed, anyway
source: parkrapidsenterprise.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Eyeless shrmp, pillowfights in lieu of NFL kickoffs, and earthquake research at the Sybian Building: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 4/15 - 4/21
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
You know how the Social Security trust fund was going to run dry by 2036? Well, turns out that might have been a tad bit optimistic
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Colorize this mustachioed astronaut
source: pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Houston Press)
 
 
 
Getting drunk and crashing into a police Blood Alcohol Testing Van and clipping two patrol cars is no way to drum up business, Miss hospital spokeswoman
source: blogs.houstonpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Boy takes girl with Down Syndrome to prom, where every dance is a slow dance
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Iowa City Press-Citizen)
 
 
 
Iowa City to host "Slut Walk." Or as it's normally called, "Friday and Saturday Night"
source: press-citizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global TV Edmonton)
 
 
 
Vader charged with murder of missing Alberta couple, entire population of Alderaan
source: globaltvedmonton.com   |   share: