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Sun April 18, 2010
(WLSAM)
 
 
 
Youngest person to row across Atlantic ate 300 candy bars, listened to 100 books on tape and is smokin' hot
source: wlsam.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
If you see a bunch of armed men in a national park within sight of the Capitol building tomorrow, don't be alarmed. They're Tea Party Patriots, and they're here to help
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Stop me if you've heard this one before: Republican leaders think we should "go back to the drawing board" on financial reform
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marion Star)
 
 
 
Ohio woman growing pineapple in living room. I'm not sure why this is news either
source: marionstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Bulletin)
 
 
 
Another athletic event SbB will never cover; College students ride unicycles 4 hours down Route 66 for free strawberry donut
source: dailybulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Now there's something you don't see every day. A man requesting a paternity test so the child can pay for the father. Then again, it's Oprah
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this job opening
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
You've been up all night drinking with your friends. Do you (a) make a fool of yourself in front of the opposite sex (b) throw up on someone and go home to bed (c) climb into a wheeled trash can and roll down the street to your death
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NCLR)
 
 
 
You're a county dealing with a hospitalized elderly gay couple. Do you c.) refuse visitation, disregard their wills, call them "roommates", sell their belongings, and allow one to die alone in a hospital without his partner?
source: nclrights.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner says the economy is growing faster than the Obama administration expected. Still unclear what nation he's referring to
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Here's a questionnaire to let you know what sort of unpowered superhero you are
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Springfield News Sun)
 
 
 
Small town insists Ohio DOT can't shut down its speed trap because town has been posting illegal speed limits for 50 years and they have seniority or something
source: springfieldnewssun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Israel bans fishing in the Sea of Galilee. Peter, Andrew, James and John are inconsolable
source: news.smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Now that the feds may indict him, Sheriff Arpaio might run for governor of Arizona. "These left-wing groups and their allies in the media need to know just how strong the support is among law-abiding people like you"
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby Atlas lion, extinct in the wild, born at Space Farms Zoo. With video
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
General Motors, coming to a church near you
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Photoshop these subterranean test takers
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arizona Star)
 
 
 
Former University of Arizona Vice President Sharon Kha fights Parkinson's Disease with the obvious therapy: Rap. Let us know how that shakes out for you, Notorious K.H.A
source: azstarnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Colbert: "this is the warped creation of a syphilitic brain." (w/video)
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
1000 years ago Polynesians migrated from French Polynesia to New Zealand in canoes. Changed minds, now going back
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Posting porn on a web site named after a politician is a criminal civil rights violation in Massachusetts
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Icelandic ash isn't the only thing invading European airspace. Hint: the bear is back
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
Houston, we've had an ARRAY(0xc15c624)
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Eggs like you've never seen them. You'll have to bring your own bacon
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wkyc.com)
 
 
 
Golden retriever stays with her master until the end. After you read the article, you might want to watch a comedy to make yourself feel better... maybe some Futurama?
source: wkyc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Mayor compares himself to Jesus after getting caught peeing on a tree. "Yes two blokes got crucified this week ...and both will most certainly rise from the dead to come back to haunt a few people"
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Channel)
 
 
 
IT'S A TRAPEZE
source: thebostonchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Cuban cigar legend dies at 91. Will be cremated slowly over an after-dinner glass of brandy
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
One meerkat's quest for love = SERIOUS BUSINESS
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Times)
 
 
 
Japanese man goes full retard after his dad cancels internet
source: search.japantimes.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this quad biker
source: photos.streamphoto.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
6.3 earthquake in Papua New Guinea. Since no one is dead or injured you can go back to reading the Christina Hendricks thread in the Showbiz tab
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Psychology Today)
 
 
 
Religion (or lack thereof) as a mating strategy
source: psychologytoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Walkin' Guy)
 
 
 
Tuxedo rental: $125. Limosine rental: $200/hr. Having to call your mom for a ride home because your rented limo was repossessed while you were inside at prom? Priceless
source: ktul.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Australian beach to house life-sized replica of Stonehenge. Spinal Tap unimpressed
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WWSB ABC 7)
 
 
 
Boy brings rabid bat to elementary school for show-and-tell, orders round of shots for all his friends
source: mysuncoast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Woman makes aprons described as sexy, sassy, and hot. At least that's what you can tell your wife when you give her one for Mother's Day
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat April 17, 2010
(WPVI)
 
 
 
There's a right way and a wrong way to clean your bong. This is the wrong way
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Study says face cream made from breast milk could cure teenage acne. Subby has always preferred it directly from its natural container
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
He reportedly could not tell a lie. He also couldn't return a damn library book
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these parachutes
source: af.mil   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
President Obama cancels trip to Poland over concerns with plowing his presidential plane through miles of hot Icelandic ash, even though that would have been an incentive to Clinton *wink*
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Okay, got the pasta done. What's next in the recipe..."add salt and freshly ground black people." WHAT?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Served your time in prison? Good for you. Don't believe in God? Fark you, you're going back
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Pigs, goats and sheep all concur, the donkey was a real ass
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Security)
 
 
 
If you absolutely have to bring your two year old with you when you go shoplifting, you should remember to take him with you when you leave
source: ocala.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Tea Party Rallies? If staging public gripe fests gives these people something to do, then great. It's outside. It involves handicrafts, the making of signs and costumes. It's like Scouting for irked middle-aged white people
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Zimbabwe marks 30 happy, fun-filled years under President Mugabe
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
People who live in small apartments may have trouble storing goods purchased at Costco, reports Ric Romero with the New York Times
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
China quake death toll rises to 1339, frustrating submitters everywhere at missed chance for geeky pun
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Yahoo: 1. DoJ: 0
source: news.cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WUSA9)
 
 
 
Afghanistan summed up by Kandahar local: "Ten percent of the people are with the Taliban, 10 percent are with the government and 80 percent of the people are angry at the Taliban, the government and the foreigners."
source: wusa9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Woman dieth from blood poithoning after having tongue pierthed
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Need to know the locations of revenue generating red light cameras? There is an app for that
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
How to pronounce "Eyjafjallajökull". Step 1 is completely ignoring the phonetic spellings of it
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Farking Hipsters)
 
 
 
Just a reminder to hipsters on Fark, today is Record Store Day. But you knew that before everyone else did, and didn't need a reminder, and now it's so not cool anymore, which makes it cool. Ironic tag is here for appearances
source: recordstoreday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this teacher in a tunnel
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
The 10 greatest fictional sports ever invented. Number 1 will NOT disappoint
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daywin)
 
 
 
Subby needs need help designing reservation sign for the Tampa fark party. Link goes to an example. Use your imagination and go wild
source: img.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Motorcyclist going 152 mph passes police car going other way on winding two lane road, somehow manages to get caught
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Today's report from the Department of the Farkin' Obvious uncovers the little-known fact that many people prefer their virtual lives to their real ones. Obvious tag bangs head against monitor
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A history of the black ballpoint pen, or, one more way the federal government owns you
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Tire-shop man, Tire-shop man, Tire-shop man hates Barbershop man. They have a fight. Tire-shop wins. Tire-shop man
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Iceland continues to turn from the biggest icehole to the biggest ashhole near Europe
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Subby just KNEW kids today were a bunch of godless heathens with no respect for God, belt onions or a well-maintained lawn
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy NW Fla)
 
 
 
Saturday brings Florida tag team teacher w/ student action (with you know you would do it pics)
source: pnj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Education)
 
 
 
Big green Gumby doll in its 25th Kenduskeag race, dammit
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
New York City Mayor to artists: First Amendment now available on 1000 sheet rolls
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WUWT)
 
 
 
Not News: European "green energy" subsidies are quite high. News: Spanish scammers profit by shining diesel-powered arclights at solar panels. Fark: They were only caught because they were generating solar power at night
source: wattsupwiththat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
TSA says there are no children under 12 on No Fly list. Except, of course, for those on the list
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
It was very pleasant night. A romantic horse drawn carriage ride, on a warm moon lit night. That is, until ....,
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Not News: Dog plays doting dad to four kittens rejected by their mother. News: Dog was shot in the head three times and survived. Fark: Dogs like this are more than welcome on Caturday
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Although you might think all these recent earthquakes are the result of shifting tectonic plates, they're actually created by dolled-up Iranian women trolling for extramarital sex
source: couriermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Young boy with a prosthetic leg gets to meet and play basketball with his hero, Lakers' center Pau Gasol. Boy promptly schools Gasol for 15 points and two uncontested dunks
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: It wasn't me
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Denver zoo now has a foosa. With ugly-ass pic
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Jesus saves... comic strips from being mediocre
source: robertsinclair.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Unmanned excavator crashes into home
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Catholic church goes too far, now blames porn for child abuse scandal
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
In face of volcano, John Cleese travels from Oslo to Brussels by a) silly walking b) steam roller or c) $5,000 taxi ride
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Survivor: Treehouse
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hemingway in a Saturn?)
 
 
 
Man who looks like Ernest Hemingway is on the prowl in the green hills of Newton, looking for a moveable feast of children and hopes your son also rises
source: newstimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri April 16, 2010
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Photoshop this control center
source: inapcache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Starting this summer in Arizona, it will be legal to carry a concealed firearm without a permit
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Dieting increases your chances of getting heart disease and cancer. But you'll leave behind a great looking corpse
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
Be on the lookout for a masturbating candyman candyman candyman candyman candyman
source: signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Ugly ass baby lorises born at Moody Gardens in Galveston, and by ugly, I mean UGLY
source: zooborns.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Miami)
 
 
 
Miami-Dade Transit pulls "Fatwa on your head?" ads from its buses to avoid offending Muslims, hairdressers
source: nbcmiami.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Girl slashes sister's face at light rail stop after they argue. I hope you know you could get in big trouble bringing that thing on board with you, young lady
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A nine-year old boy successfully hacks his school's network. Surprisingly, everyone reacted calmly and rationally
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman in critical condition after dog tried to get her face steak
source: wdam.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Life.com)
 
 
 
In honor of the 67th anniversary of Albert Hoffman's first-ever acid trip with LSD-25, ah, phffft, whoooahhh, space whale ship with sparks
source: life.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL News)
 
 
 
Russian pilot gets lost and crashes before he could ask for directions from the driver of the tractor he hit
source: aolnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
30,000 NYC doormen threaten to strike. Who will open the door for negotiations, then?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
This week's mugshot roundup: Uninvited guest
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
The State of Minnesota decides that it is likely that dried fish guts are not good for you
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Taste of Chicago bans all vendors who do not have a restaurant in Chicago from participating. F*ck you, then, City of Chicago, I'll just drive to Aurora for my Portillo's
source: chicagobreakingbusiness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
It's been one year since Florida's python hunt began. Guess how many pythons they got
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Beaten Guy)
 
 
 
Good Samaritan prevents police officer's baton from getting scratched on the pavement by placing his body in front of it fifteen times
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Molar)
 
 
 
The truth is that fluoridation and the proclaimed benefit of fluoride as a way of preventing dental decay is perhaps the greatest "scientific" fraud ever perpetrated upon an unsuspecting public, other than the moon landing, of course
source: westonaprice.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(10 News San Diego)
 
 
 
A man got stabbed in Rolando. There was something in the air that night, the knives were bright, Rolando, they were stabbing you and me, for liberty, Rolando
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Reminder: Cleveland Fark Party @ Notacon tonight
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
Stay classy, _in_c_est High School, Class of 2010
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Most disapprove of how Catholic church handles kids
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Trucker killed in tragic katamari accident
source: coventrytelegraph.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Show)
 
 
 
Best Daily Show Clip EVAR, featuring the only guy out there that can make Jon Stewart beg for mercy
source: thedailyshow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Furniture)
 
 
 
Photoshop this skeleton-like table
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but it won't keep the cops away if you're using one to smoke pot. "The report did not specify the type of apple, which apparently still could be eaten if someone had the munchies."
source: blogs.tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Stephanie Meyer's "Twilight" novels have become the fifth most banned or challenged book in the world. This marks the first time a book has ever been banned solely because it sucks
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
The inside story behind the biggest ladies man in television, and why all of the women are irresistibly drawn to his riot-provoking sexuality
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
"Sup? Wen u kild me n dismembered my body, I lived, so u should go 2 each location u scattered my limbs @ 2 make sure. TTYL" signed, the cops
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
New motion in school district webcam spying case quotes admin as "loving" the "little...soap opera" the tracking software provided. Bonus: Pic of kid sleeping taken from laptop
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
Police say woman who drove head on into a garbage truck was trashed
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
10 traits that will come in handy during any apocalypse
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Law student who led 'Lady Asbo' double life as escort died after taking meow meow. (The British, they talk like they're always drunk.)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Boy kills dad with sledgehammer after being banned from playing computer games. Game over man...Game over
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
After a thorough investigation, transit agency officials have decided there's no need for BART cops to have tasers. After all, who needs a taser when you can use a real gun to shoot an unarmed guy in the back?
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Man police found stuck in the ventilation system of a MD convenience store claims it wasn't a case of attempted burglary but just the end of a hide-and-seek game gone horribly wrong
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Shoe shiner arrested for burning down rival stands. Luckily no soles were lost. Would have gotten away with it, if it wasn't for those meddling keds
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
TSGs Friday Photo Fun. What's my line? I mean besides being a criminal
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Are you happy, sex abuse victims? You've ruined the pope's birthday
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING5)
 
 
 
Hey man, how was your vacation? Oh it was great, until I got arrested when they busted the bestiality brothel
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"But officer, I thought I was blinding the pilot of a news helicopter, NOT a National Guard helicopter. Honest mistake."
source: policeone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Remember the EVERYBODY PANIC about crack babies? Turns out they have not grown into super-predators. They're not even permanently inferior deviants mired in a life of perpetual suffering
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Education)
 
 
 
"The suspect's attempted flight to freedom ended abruptly when his pants fell down around his ankles, causing him to fall to the ground"
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Journal (Maine))
 
 
 
20-foot inflatable colon is the butt of many jokes
source: sunjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Fiery Demon)
 
 
 
Radar image of Icelandic volcano reveals what's REALLY going on under the glacier: IT'S COMING TO EAT YOUR SOUL
source: icelandreview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS3.com)
 
 
 
Phillies fans enjoy their best start in 17 years by showing good will to fellow fans. Just kidding, fat drunk intentionally vomits on 11 year old girl
source: cbs3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop these lovely lanes
source: farm5.static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsBusters)
 
 
 
CNN's Rick Sanchez thinks it's too cold in Iceland for a volcano. In English, that means he's an idiot
source: newsbusters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Study: Women being blinded by jealousy is more than just an expression...they actually have trouble seeing things, although (ducks abruptly) they're still deadly with a thrown shoe at ten paces
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Twenty-year-old woman becomes first person ever to be banned from every pub and club in Britain
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KARE 11)
 
 
 
FedEx: When you absolutely, positively, must get your dolphins there overnight
source: kare11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
"I'm not going to lie. I was excited to get the pig fetus in the mail"
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop these clear containers
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 15, 2010
(Topless Robot)
 
 
 
Underoos were great when you were a kid. But now, Target will be carrying a large assortment of licensed underwear, which means that you can finally have Megatron protecting your nads and Starscream covering your ass
source: toplessrobot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
When Jennifer Nicholas sees television shows or movies where characters "hook up" or have sex with "friends with benefits," she cringes, because that's how she got herpes
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCTV5.com)
 
 
 
Record pollen count in Kansas City is so high, drug dealers are turning meth back into Sudafed
source: kctv5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Freedom From Religion Foundation)
 
 
 
US District Court declares National Day of Prayer unconstitutional
source: ffrf.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Dear Tenant, we just raised your rent as insurance in the event you die
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wordpress)
 
 
 
"Aliens have actually been sighted by British people." The ones driving your taxis don't count, gents
source: shapesinthesky.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Ramen: It's not just for poor college students any more. "When ramen is good, it's in the top three of most extraordinary, soul-satisfying foods in the world"
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Topless woman wins fight with her landlord. Giggity
source: krdo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slooh)
 
 
 
Give a cop the finger and curse at him? That's a taseri....Wait, a paycheck? Sweet
source: nbcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Animal group: Dumbo's handler's death no accident
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
When asked if they could be famous for one thing, what would it be, students reply "having an affair with the president," "dropping a nuke on the Middle East," and "leader of the KKK."
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Farmers say they're the victims of potato rustlers who steal their crops in the dead of night. Vow to keep their eyes on their fields
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
An iPhone. An air conditioner. Dirty underpants. A sock-wearing mannequin. Thousands of cigarette butts. A pregnancy test. Denture cement. Fake breasts. An 8-track tape. A jockstrap
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this derelict doll display
source: bigpicture.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Pope says church must do penance for abuse. A couple of Hail Marys and a few Our Fathers should do it, right guys?
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman calls 911 to report husband has taken too many sleeping pills. Police arrive and immediately alleviate concerns of death by sleeping pill overdose
source: wwltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
The best pictures of dead cockroaches dressed up and displayed in different dioramas you'll see...Aghhhhhhh...no, sorry, that's just creepy. Liberoachi??? Really???
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Houston Press)
 
 
 
Upscale, executive chef displays his colorful sleeves and fighting chicken tattoos with the kind of cheeky and playful attitude that comes across in his cooking. With pic of what a shirtless, tattooed, pork-pie-wearing chef may look like
source: houstonpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Government Technology)
 
 
 
"My job is to put myself out of business"
source: govtech.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
San Francisco public defender decides 50,000 victories on appeal would look really good on his record
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
National park fees waived next week. EVERYBODY PICNIC
source: news.bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Military completing test of dirigibles they believe will give them a decisive advantage in future conflicts. No, this isn't a repeat from Bismarck's Germany
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
A squirrel named Pearl is the new mascot for New York's Parks Department, narrowly edging out Vinnie the Rat
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rutland Herald)
 
 
 
Police Corporal is on the case of high profile tortoise-snatching investigation. His ace in the hole: his son has a pet tortoise. "I know what they look like."
source: rutlandherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
Anaheim mayor proposes charter amendment banning red light cameras after he gets ticket in mail for accidentally driving in bus lane in London
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Man learns that sheriffs are surprisingly intolerant of people who point green lasers at their helicopters
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
The Goosecam is back
source: edmontonjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chronicle of Higher Ed)
 
 
 
Beards build trust, unless you're an underwear model
source: chronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Comedy Central)
 
 
 
Stop me if you've heard this one: A fudge packer, Muhammad, and Rob Reiner walk into a bar
source: southparkstudios.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Meth producers are now discarding their lab equipment by tossing it out the window of their car. Jeez. Don't they know that littering is illegal?
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The Fortune 500 list has a new champion, and you're not gonna like who it is
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBSpot)
 
 
 
Twitter will require new users to enter a CAPTCHA for their first 100 tweets to stop robots. Skynet does not approve
source: bbspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Warrant issued after man hits wife with cherry pie. Police hope to get such a sweet surprise by arresting him and making a grown man cry
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Problems with your rabbit barking all night, biting the mail man, making a mess on the carpet? Now there's hope
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Rather than have incumbent Barbara Brock serve four more years as mayor, Tennessee town knowingly elects a dead man instead
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Scared Guy)
 
 
 
♫ How much is that Bobcat in the attic ? ♪ ♪ The one with the glooowwwing eyes ♫
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Before spending 40 minutes yelling and threatening your staff for giving you a bad rating, try to remember to make sure nobody is recording your tirade
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Melissa and Tammy Etheridge have ended their nearly nine-year relationship, which is almost as long as 'Come to my Window' has been stuck in subby's head
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Orca, OSHA. OSHA, Orca
source: content.usatoday.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
An elite panel of climate scientists would like you to know that the climate scientists who misrepresented climate science should still be trusted on climate science
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Mechanics)
 
 
 
Military is now one step closer to creating Doom
source: popularmechanics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Woman: When I called 911 to report my house on fire, they put me on hold, and it burned down. County: Not true-we didn't put her on hold--we put her in a "queue"
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PCWorld)
 
 
 
10 things the internet has ruined. Productivity conspicuously missing from list
source: pcworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
"This is your captain speaking. As we ascend out of London to our cruising altitude, you might look out your window at the deadly cloud of volcanic ash that's about to consume us all"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(1000 Awesome Things)
 
 
 
Congrats to Farker Neil on his Book of Awesome which publishes today. Link goes to the first post he got Farked which started it all. (Also, check out the shout-out to Fark in the book Acknowledgments)
source: 1000awesomethings.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR.COM)
 
 
 
Want to get past your DWI ignition lock? Have your daughter take a breath test
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lancashire Evening Post)
 
 
 
Dog takes a day off from biting the postman by taking a chunk out of a politician instead. Mmmmm, tastes like pork
source: lep.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Protip: When pruning a tree, be careful not to chop off the branch you're leaning on
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Eliot Spitzer: a three-hooker-a-day kind of guy
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man at work
source: bigpicture.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
Not news: People keep spotting a monkey in their yards all around the Tampa area. News: Monkey could be rabid, have the herp. Fark: Residents who like feeding him threaten the life of the trapper trying to find him
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Gates: Wikileaks 'Irresponsible' for releasing video, almost as irresponsible as the soldiers killing unarmed civilians, but not quite
source: news.antiwar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Press)
 
 
 
Not news: Hospital in dispute with a vendor. News: Hospital can't perform open heart surgeries because of it. Fark: Dispute spreads to YouTube
source: dailypress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
♪ What shall we do with the drunken Steeler ♪ What shall we do with the drunken Steeler ♪ What shall we do with the drunken Steeler ♪ Early in the morning ♪
source: content.usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Thousands of Illinoisians reported seeing a large streetlight streak across the sky last night
source: chicagobreakingnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
The myth of the Frankensnowflake
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Texas governor warns Tea Party protesters to watch their backs, beware of liberal infiltrators, and make sure that the only racist signs at the rally are the ones they brought themselves
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Cat survives being shot nine times, launches rap career
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
British Chiropractic Association cracks
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
After forty-seven years, Tom Jones is allowed back in Wales, cleared of charges that he stole a famous chicken
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
This tax day did you remember to take your mustache deduction?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contact Music)
 
 
 
Don't worry, Susan Boyle can explain why she was dancing and singing into a mophead at the airport
source: contactmusic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Scientists create a bulletproof t-shirt by adding a fourth wolf
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
School administrators who spent countless taxpayer dollars prosecuting 16-year-olds with nude photos of themselves suddenly facing child pornography charges for viewing the photos during the investigation
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
"9-1-1, what's your emergency?" "Hi, this is Ben Dover and I'm being raped by a whale inside Dr. Who's TARDIS"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kiro.TV)
 
 
 
It goes without saying not to use a loaded gun as a sex toy during foreplay
source: kirotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS11tv.com)
 
 
 
Man pleads guilty to cheating in a bass tournament. He received a jail sentence THIS big
source: cbs11tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL News)
 
 
 
A full list of companies that will be giving away free food and drink on Tax Day. Go to Starbucks, Cinnabon, and Boston Market and call it a day
source: aolnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Herald Sun)
 
 
 
Good news: Somebody comes up with something original for Hollywood. Bad news: Building mansions around the Hollywood sign and obscuring it unless folks raise enough cash to save it
source: heraldsun.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Massey has refused to allow miners time off so that they can attend the funerals of their coworkers
source: wsws.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Homeowner gets upset when neighbors complain about his new deck, so he decides to really give them something to whine about (w/ pic)
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(kpho.com)
 
 
 
♫ And he would walk five pain-filled miles ♫ And probably not too much more ♫ Just to receive medical attention ♫ 'Cause that rattler left him sore ♫ OW OW OW OW ♫ OW OW OW OW ♫
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Man gets hit in the head with a snake during a motel fight in South Carolina. NTTAWWT
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Photoshop these marble men
source: cache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
London EuroFark Party Reminder: Apr 24th London. Drew will be there
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 258: "One is the Loneliest Number". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Artificial pancreas offers promise for diabetics. Sweet
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed April 14, 2010
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Meet Aki Ra, the guy who goes around defusing landmines with a pocketknife, a pipe wrench, and a pair of the biggest balls in the world
source: badassoftheweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
City workers fired for taking 50 cases of expired Budweiser headed for the city landfill. "Beer is a popular product"
source: columbiatribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
T.F. woman sentenced to life for lewdness charge. Still doesn't explain that extra dot
source: magicvalley.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scientific American)
 
 
 
Cool: Hot MIT scientist creates virus that turns water to hydrogen gas. Awesome: Your mother-in-law might one day catch a disease that turns her to hydrogen gas
source: scientificamerican.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsOK)
 
 
 
The exposed genitals of Jesus -- what a great name for a band
source: newsok.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRGV)
 
 
 
Man arrested for exposing himself to young girls is also known to throw stones at passing cars. Clearly, this guy likes to get his rocks off
source: krgv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Springfield News Leader)
 
 
 
Hey bartender, I'll have a shot of whiskey & a pickle juice chaser
source: news-leader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Hunter may have killed a rare pizzly bear, also known in some circles as a grolar pear
source: vancouversun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FedBlog)
 
 
 
What the hell kind of muppet show are they running over at the Pentagon?
source: blogs.govexec.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Icelandic authorities evacuated about sadkjnueriuanj people early Wednesday when a vanjfjfnfnekenfn erupted beneath the Eyjafjallajokull glacier
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fast Company)
 
 
 
Some eco-nut thinks there's enough plastic in the Great Garbage Patch to build a floating city. I'm pretty sure this just like Sea Britain, but without Charlize Theron playing a MRF
source: fastcompany.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Burn victim does not match description given by family member. No kidding
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this coach having a conniption
source: sportpicture.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The coolest pics and video of a guy catching a connecting flight you ever see
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Government Technology)
 
 
 
White House asking Twitter users for ideas to solve science and engineering problems. So far the ideas submitted are about as useless as Twitter
source: govtech.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
New York dating coach teaches nice guys how pick up chicks, score an 8.9 on Hot or Not, and have enough time to hit the gym in 26 minutes
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Wii Fit injury turns woman into a slut
source: in.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Good News: Jersey city solves over half of its unsolved murders. Bad news: It was the same guy
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
God led rescuer to lost girl in the swamp after he yelled her name and she said 'What?"
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
American Family Association blogger suggests families should not receive any assistance in raising children born out of wedlock. "It's no longer fashionable to call them 'bastards,' but that's what they are."
source: afa.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL News)
 
 
 
Police bust third grader for suspected heroin dealing. Next, on Thomas the Trainspotter
source: aolnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
81-year-old grandma tussles with a 1700-pound bull over lawn rights
source: cairns.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Thank you for calling the Federal Nuclear Detonation Response Hotline. Your call is very important to us. Current wait time for the next operator: 24-72 hours. ♫ Tall and tan and dark and lovely, the girl from Ipanema goes walking ♫
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
So it turns out that "fondling" is not part of the standard field sobriety test
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Radio station for blind to go off air, victim of budget cuts. I SAID, RADIO STATION FOR BLIND TO GO OFF A ststststst
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGAL 8)
 
 
 
"Hmmm... I don't think that beam's structural" is not a good way to start a building renovation
source: wgal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"Woman killed by son-in-law who had previously been her husband." Bonus: Saddam Hussein connection
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Last sardine factory in the United States gets canned
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Wonder Bra. New and bottoms up: Wonder Pants. Fark: For men
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Transportation secretary declares bicycles as equals to other transportation modes, such as cars, trucks and your mom
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this grandiose getaway
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Gallant provides proper identification to the police upon being pulled over. Goofus gives the police a Post-it note that has someone else's name and date of birth
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(io9)
 
 
 
After fifteen years, man comes forward and wants help identifying the nature of a secreting skull he found at sea
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British company forced to remove seven-year olds' bikinis
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLBZ2.com)
 
 
 
Cops and hazmat teams called to home after landlord thought the former tenants were running a meth lab because of the awful smell. It turned out to be the only thing that could possibly smell worse
source: wlbz2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Fark ready headline: "Anti-Kidnapping Chief Missing in Mexico City"
source: wibw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
BBC implements Fark headline filters
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some 8th horseman)
 
 
 
One if by land, two if by WEEEEEEEE
source: wmtw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(chicagobusiness)
 
 
 
Boeing denies Ryanair's claim "that removing two toilets and adding six seats would not slow down emergency evacuations." Umm, Ryanair officials, that's exactly what removing toilets will do
source: chicagobusiness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Copper piping stolen from hrch
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Herald Sun)
 
 
 
86-year-old granny thrown out of supermarket for eating a cookie she paid for. If only there was some snack-related idiom about how one shouldn't feel bad about negative events that one has no control over
source: heraldsun.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Barack Obama)
 
 
 
"Health Reform is a BFD" wins the official T-shirt contest - and they actually admit it and put it on sale
source: my.barackobama.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Some in Malta think a phallic sculpture should be torn down before the Pope's upcoming visit. They don't want it to offend a man who lives in a palace filled with single guys, carries a long, hard staff, and wears silk robes all day
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Syria ships long-range SCUD missiles directly to Hezbollah. Apparently some people have a problem with this
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Spirit Airlines' $45 carry-on fee meets some resistance. Crazy
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Door-to-door meat salesman busted for swallowing a half-burned marijuana joint in front of the cops. In other news, you can get a job selling meat door-to-door
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bubble blower
source: bigpicture.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Fark/Reddit Party in Armenia TONIGHT 8pm local time, Baobob Beerhouse, Yerevan. Come meet Drew and Reddit founder Alexis Ohanian
source: armeniadiaspora.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Los Angeles)
 
 
 
People with fewer teeth prone to die of heart disease, meth lab explosions
source: myfoxla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Today: Parents hire "evil clown" to stalk, harass kids at birthday parties. Next week: Traumatized precious snowflakes' parents demand their money back before lynching evil clown
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some sore tooth)
 
 
 
If your dentist's office door is hidden behind a refrigerator, you might want to double check his credentials
source: fcnp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue April 13, 2010
(BBC)
 
 
 
China scores a 6.9 in the tectonolympics
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
It's almost April 15: Time for the media's annual panicgasm about Congress not finishing the federal budget in time and the government "running out of money." EVERYBODY YAWN
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Post Gazette)
 
 
 
Family suing convenience store because clerk pointed scanner at girl's face, allegedly causing burns, post-traumatic stress and Tourette's syndrome
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Audiophile)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bottle microphone
source: imgboot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Autistic girl rescued after being stranded in swamp for 4 days, 7 hours, 33 minutes and 19 seconds
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
♫ This is what it sounds like, when frogs cry ♫
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Refusing to deploy because Obama isn't an American? You better believe that's a court martiallin'
source: firstread.msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Massachusetts priest calls for pope's resignation: "[A]nyone with an ounce of intelligence knows the media has not created this scandal. The institutional church has brought this onto themselves"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Israeli government to its citizens of Sinai: GTFO NOW
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Theological professor endorses evolution, loses his job. Probably should've prayed for tenure
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Presenting the only map a Farker will ever need: The ratio of pizza shops, gun shops, and strip clubs in a given geographic area. Not referenced: Cosplay conventions
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Since airlines are charging for overhead bags, and their imaging scanners will see you naked anyway, why not make this year's trip a "Nakation?"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Children with a rare genetic disorder have no innate racism, though still feel women be shoppin'
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"The American fear of science is going to kill us"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Not News: Some beef is bad. News: Beef grown in the US is rejected by Mexico for failing Mexican safety standards. Fark: Beef is OK'd for sale in the US by the USDA
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Urban encounters with "mountain lions" becoming more frequent. Subby hasn't been to the bars lately, but has heard of the phenomenon on TV
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Scientists: Girls should not drink until 21. Everybody else: KILL THE NERDS
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Mrs. Hall said: "I've had a lot of things happen in my life and this is actually a minor one..." Considering she was referring to a five-ton boulder landing on her car, I'd say she's led an interesting life (w/pic)
source: uk.cars.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Mississippi county schools ordered to comply with desegregation order. This is not a repeat from 1957
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Bettie Page, FBI Consultant. Offered expert guidance on whips, paddles, rawhide, ropes. Giggety
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
You know those stories about doctors amputating the wrong limb or removing the wrong organ? This is just like that, only with fetuses
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
North Korea's "It's so Funny" is television's longest running show, despite being utterly devoid any content that is even vaguely amusing. So pretty much North Korea's version of The Tonight Show
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The Hitler Bunker "Downfall" meme is covered by mainstream media, now truly dead. Video of Hitler's reaction to story expected soon
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL News)
 
 
 
"All Blacks leave the store" looks like it's rapidly becoming NJ's answer to "pants on the ground"
source: dailyfinance.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
NJ Gov Christie is demanding the teacher's union fire an official because he wrote a memo that referred to Christie as his "favorite governor"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Is this joke premature?)
 
 
 
Clown car sends newest clown back for repairs less than a week after getting it back from the shop
source: associatedcontent.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YumSugar)
 
 
 
For the fashionable functioning alcoholic in your family: The wine purse, complete with built-in dispenser (pic)
source: yumsugar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Not news: Baby born at home. News: Government raid at 3 AM to investigate unregistered baby. Fark: Baby is a horse
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guys)
 
 
 
Photoshop these hard heads
source: sciencemuseum.org.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
"This is WZAZ in Mogadishu, where disco lives forev--"
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ouch: Police shoot man with 50,000-volt Taser. Farkin Ouch: after he suffers epileptic seizure on the floor in a gym
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fosters.com)
 
 
 
Two men were arrested for burglary after police were able to track them through their electronic monitoring bracelets
source: fosters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Hawaiian Airlines repeats as number 1 in quality rankings...remember that while you're paying 30 bucks for each bag you check
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Scientist)
 
 
 
Attention Leftists Subversives and Radical Right Wing Extremists -Your secret forum hidden on the "dark web" where you are plotting the overthrow of the government, Big Brother has found it and is cataloging all of your conversations
source: newscientist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Students see themselves in Anne Frank, which is more than Anne could ever do
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Followup on the Chicago AWpocalypse, hanging out in Armenia with the founder of Reddit, and some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 4/4 - 4/10
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Not News: Security guard fired. News: For sleeping on the job. Fark: It was a dog
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mr Idiot)
 
 
 
Not news: Teen makes a prom dress out of gum wrappers. Fark: It's actually very pretty. Bonus: she made her date a matching vest
source: kimt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YNet)
 
 
 
Iranian official: We'll be nuclear in a month. But we'll only use it for electricity and food irradiation. And maybe a bit of Israeli irradiation. But that's it
source: ynetnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bacon)
 
 
 
The coolest AT-AT made of bacon you'll see all day
source: tifr.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Coming soon to a Poland near you: 96 Funerals and an Election
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
This certainly isn't going to help the argument about how well women drive (pic)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
What happens when a Christian morals-first pharmacy doesn't sell birth control, condoms, porn, tobacco or makeup? Well, it goes out of business, for one thing
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Father of the year candidate arrested for leaving his baby alone in the car while he engaged in a hunt for a new mommy
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
"The officer also noticed that the driver's head could not be seen above the steering column, so he stopped the truck"
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Next time you're manning the suicide helpline, please try not to snore
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this worn-out wall
source: farm3.static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(3 News New Zealand)
 
 
 
For perhaps the first time in history, police are clueless as to whether a spraypainted goat has been attacked by computer nerds or gangsta rappers (with pic)
source: 3news.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR)
 
 
 
Bar manager realizes that attacking his customers with a sword might be like cutting off his nose to spite his face, so instead he cuts off his customer's nose
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A woman who liberally uses hairspray is named the Village Idiot of Indiana after she sets her hair on fire while lighting a cigarette
source: heraldsun.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KY3)
 
 
 
Woman's "Hey, come take anything you want" Craigslist ad met with very, very enthusiastic response
source: ky3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Fugitives on the run try to pull the wool over the eyes of the cops by pulling the wool over their eyes and hiding in sheep costumes
source: couriermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Three dead, one missing as Navy jet crashes in Georgia forest North of Atlanta
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
'Spiritual cleanser' charged with sexual molestation, getting his Clorox off
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(officer.com)
 
 
 
"9-1-1, what's your emergency?" "Well, this avalanche covered me with snow and I was hoping someone might have a shovel?"
source: officer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4.com)
 
 
 
Evil insurance company drops mom with cancer one week before her needed bone marrow transplant. Oh no, wait, it was Medicaid
source: cbs4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
If you're gonna steal someone's ID in order to steal unemployment benefits, make sure that person isn't on trial for murder
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Cable Guy)
 
 
 
Teen's nipple clamp fetish sparks police inquiry into his shocking behavior
source: www1.whdh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Two-headed monster)
 
 
 
Pens to erect big screen outside arena for playoffs. Yeah, I read that wrong the first time too
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Nuclear Power Plant)
 
 
 
Photoshop this decontaminator
source: de.img.seen.by   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon April 12, 2010
(Salon)
 
 
 
Catholic bishop fingers the Jews for the child molestation scandal. With oddly literal graphic of what "fingering the Jews" might look like
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Dow closes above 11K for the first time in 18 months. Stocks from companies that sell unicorn food are at an all time high
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Tips on how to fight an IRS audit. Attempted bribery (especially with pizza) notably absent
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Mom always said, "Just because you're preparing for the apocalyptic End Times war, doesn't mean you can't get a job."
source: tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
"Vasquez was arrested [...] after someone saw him exiting a window on the 4th floor and getting onto a fire escape after allegedly taking a stapler from an office inside."
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(shortbread)
 
 
 
Iron Photoshop Ingredient: Cookies
source: images1.fanpop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Spanking your child could create a bully. Punching your child could create better bully
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yorkshire Evening Post)
 
 
 
Man who had sex with horse "does not have stable address"
source: yorkshireeveningpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Today)
 
 
 
Japanese police officers hide in a closet for six days to bust a boy stealing 9 bucks in change
source: japantoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
The Seven most horrifying things ever discovered in a human body
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Magazine)
 
 
 
So, 3 Hasidic Jews and 120 hipster cyclists walk into a bar
source: nymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IOL.co.za)
 
 
 
Clerk: "Hey, did those kids just steal a banana?" Security guard: *BANG* "Nope, wasn't them."
source: iol.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Remains of an alien mothership sent from a strange civilization may be lying dormant in a Maryland forest
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
Mickey Rourke insisted Whiplash have a parrot to give the character more depth. Some guy investigates, through Photoshop, if this works for other characters as well
source: uproxx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Good news farkers, there are 40 percent more rich women who still won't have anything to do with you now than there were 5 years ago
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Chinese scientists find cure for cancer. Of course, since it's China, it involves tainting your blood with toxic metals
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News on 6)
 
 
 
Police shoot, kill man who threatens suicide. That'll teach him
source: newson6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Laser nuclear technology might pose frickin security risk
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Americans who are not you are having more casual sex
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Early reviews of the KFC Double Down reveal that this fat-tastic masterpiece looks about as gross as it sounds
source: ijustwanttofitin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(American Library Association)
 
 
 
It's National Library Week. Remember those things that were like Wikipedia, only they took four hours?
source: ala.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Rule of thumb is that after the cops arrest you in one of those 'come and pick up your free money' stings, you don't really get any money
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
...and today's thing the Daily Mail claims gives you cancer is: turning the lights on when going to the toilet at night
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Hungary's ruling Socialist party suffers a stinging election defeat at the hands of, to judge by the picture accompanying the article, The Extremely Silly Hat Party
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Don't worry Virginia, if you want to recognize April as "Confederate History Month", you go ahead. Mississippi's got your back
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
"Male studies" threaten to penetrate university Women's Studies programs
source: ideas.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Catholic clergy says removing statute of limitations on sex abuse is unnecessary because they've eliminated sex abuse through a zero tolerance policy
source: ctcatholic.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Rio: Caught between heaven and hell
source: totallycoolpix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Doctors working in the UK must speak English. This seems like a sticky wicket, all mouth and trousers, as if it's carrying coals to Newcastle. Although this takes the biscuit, but don't go spare, Bob's your uncle
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
It just might have been the crime of the century. Here's the story
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
America's real religion: The belief that everything is someone else's fault
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Online Sentinel.com)
 
 
 
Hello mudder, go no farther
source: onlinesentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
But in this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes. Well, death, taxes and people filing taxes for dead people. With pic of what a zombie tax filer might look like
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Education)
 
 
 
Man overturns his canoe in the morning, comes back later in the day with another canoe to retrieve the first one and capsizes again. Subby like to know where he got the notion
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flats monument
source: de.img.seen.by   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)