Skip to content
Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
You might try our Headline Search for easier navigation here.

These links may be stale and generate errors. Can't do much about it. Tastes like chicken.
Sun January 22, 2006
(Some Bottled-In-Bond Guy)
 
 
 
Scientists at the Dept Of Making Stuff Up in a tizzy over global warming's effect on Kentucky bourbon production.(article on the right)
source: nrdc.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Army prepares to test-fire gun that can shoot 240,000 rounds a minute. NRA already thinking up reasons for owning one of these - like a million burglars are breaking into your home and you only have four minutes to defend yourself
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Majority of U.S. managers prefer to communicate by email. The decisions are just as stupid, but you can make whatever faces you like as you read them
source: washtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
FBI names top 10 crimes against art in the world. Thomas Kinkade, Andrew Lloyd Webber conspicuously absent from list
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
US Navy destroyer chases down traditional dhow filled with pirates, demonstrating to Civ IV players importance of upgrading your fleet
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Hurricane evacuees want Louisiana to be built better than it was before. Better, stronger, faster
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV)
 
 
 
As they head to the polls, Canadians warned they can face three months in PMITA prison for spoling, defacing or eating their ballots
source: ctv.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Bahrain company hiring Michael Jackson to help design amusement parks. Photoshop some of the attractions
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
"There is a lunatic fringe to the orchid world, and a fine line between the average grower and the horticulturally insane."
source: washtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHO TV)
 
 
 
Stealing billions from US Taxpayers and doing business with Iran in direct violation of US Sanctions was obviously not enough. Halliburton is now giving polluted water to US Troops. Cheney seen mumbling "excellent"
source: whotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Football discussion
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
NBC puts "The West Wing" out of its misery. "There's a point when you look at the ratings and say, it feels like it's time,"
source: breakingnews.nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contact Music)
 
 
 
New Brando biography promises oral history
source: contactmusic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
Terrible law student matures into terrible lawyer. Here is his story
source: sptimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(history of these games)
 
 
 
Official your team sucks, my team rules, the refs suck, AFC/NFC Conference Championship discussion thread
source: superbowl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Paramedics suspended for not responding to emergency call because "it wasn't their turn"
source: seriousaboutnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Several wealthy 'cryonauts,' who freeze their bodies after death in the hope of someday being revived, are exploring ways to hold onto their wealth in the frosty hereafter -- in effect, leaving their money to themselves
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Privately-minted $20 "Liberty" coins on their way to becoming the new Taco Bell $2 bills
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Impact Lab)
 
 
 
Interesting op-ed piece on the Google/DOJ story from this week
source: impactlab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
((Ferrofluid Sculptures Aficionad)
 
 
 
Ferrofluid Sculptures
source: 99express.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Impact Lab)
 
 
 
China is working to build the world's first nuclear fusion device. What could possibly go wrong?
source: impactlab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Latest culinary trend: secret, unlicensed "underground" restaurants
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: the latest in Nerf technology
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Wicked Northern Lights pics
source: photon-echoes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH)
 
 
 
"Lolita" pulled from school library shelves to keep teachers from molesting their students
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Overshot the runway, and you're to blame, you give pilots a bad name
source: music.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman finds lottery tickey in birthday card from 1992 that turns out to be a 75k winner
source: allheadlinenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Enquirer)
 
 
 
N'Syncers Joey and Lance pitching Odd Couple-type sitcom to UPN in attempt to cross-suck from music to TV; well, Joey's pitching. Lance is catching
source: entertainment.excite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
It's okay to sexually assault and harass female celebrities if you're a fashion designer and "poke and prod at people's dresses every day."
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(baynews9)
 
 
 
Stalker of American Idol finalist repeatedly called her saying he "loved her and was willing to go to jail for her." Good thing he's OK with that last part
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Running Man)
 
 
 
Runners complete 4 mile round trip including downing a dozen glazed doughnuts in the inaugural Krispy Kreme Challenge
source: i-run.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Professor pretends to be neo-nazi to test the waters of political correctness on campus. Liberal professors are not amused to discover they have been made fun of but are now between a Reich and a hard place
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Andromeda Strain)
 
 
 
Photoshop this spacecraft that returned to Earth with samples from space
source: stardust.jpl.nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DFW.com)
 
 
 
Brewery holds rain dance for dry Texas town
source: dfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Five guys converge on Beaver Street hoping to meet "hooker" who advertised on craigslist. Jailarity ensues
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Researchers claim suntan oil sewage is turning male fish into female fish
source: news.independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Thailand's Prime Minister to star in own reality show to boost popularity
source: news.independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat January 21, 2006
(Tucson Citizen)
 
 
 
Man says he is a paranoid schizophrenic, discovers they really are out to get him as deputy responds by chasing him, tasering him, tackling him, and holding him down in the middle of the road until he gets run over
source: tucsoncitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ArcadeZero.Com)
 
 
 
Good time wasting game - how long can you last without blowing up on the walls?
source: arcadezero.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Haven Advocate)
 
 
 
Chuck Norris to oversee world-wide martial arts competition to determine "America's Toughest City". He will then eat the city and roundhouse the submitter for this mediocre headline
source: newhavenadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
If you're an aspiring inventor...The RIAA/MPAA want to take your baby away. The EFF is on the case
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Having solved that whole 'world peace' thing the UN now wants control over building permits
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Naked man calls police after intruder breaks into his house and attacks him with baseball bat. Police rush to scene and promptly arrest naked, bleeding victim. Suspect still at large
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Buskers take bung, results in a burning ring of fire
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
I couldn't lose unless I was caught in bed with a dead girl or a live boy
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ScienceDaily)
 
 
 
Just in time for the Olympics: "penis fencing"
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this checkered hallway
source: static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wsoctv.com)
 
 
 
If you were hoping to make an extra $100,000 at your tavern during NFL playoffs, first make sure you're allowed to sell alcohol on Sundays
source: wsoctv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Record)
 
 
 
Man plasters photos of scantily-clad ex-wife around town to wish her happy 40th birthday. Except she was only 37, and neither she nor the cops saw the humor in it
source: dailyrecord.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Twelve kidnapped Swedish garden gnomes found in snowy forest, standing in a ring beside a lighted bonfire. Drew's gnome still unaccounted for
source: uk.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Judge calls anti-nudity laws on Daytona Beach unconstitutional
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press & Journal)
 
 
 
Sex shop in Inverness that promised live sex show in window disappoints on two counts: The performers turned out to be rabbits and they didn't feel like performing
source: thisisnorthscotland.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN SI)
 
NewsFlash
 
Duke suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu (breath) uuuuuuuuuuuuks
source: sportsillustrated.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Violent crime is up in Canada. Naturally, this is somehow the United States' fault
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Residents of Gaywood Drive are so mad about constant theft of their street signs that they could just scream
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Troops return from Iraq to say "I'm rich biaaatch"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVO)
 
 
 
Heidi Klum's legs are insured for $2.2 million - $1.2 for the right leg but just $1 million for the left, because it's the grotesquely deformed one
source: ktvotv3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(some lovestruck guy)
 
 
 
When making a heart of candles on your beloved's front yard, try not to burn down her house
source: home.hamptonroads.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tomhshardware.com)
 
 
 
Quantum processor produced, wear helmet while reading or brain will splode from sheer amazement
source: tgdaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kentucky.com)
 
 
 
Kentucky basketball team undergoes therapy sessions to break losing streak. Duke sucks
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
One can of Red Bull or two may keep you awake while you're driving, but don't slam back 20 of them, as you may then want to lead police on a high-speed chase
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Upset that his competitors were costing him money by repeatedly hitting his Google ads, man writes software to combat "click fraud."
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
Woman wins £1.5 million lottery jackpot, manages to hide it from her husband for three years
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Disabled athlete misses his stolen car, but not as much as he misses the $5,000 artificial leg that was in the trunk
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Bored with planning to blow up the US, Osama bin Laden picks up a second gig as a book reviewer
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Thames whale captured. London sushi bars on standby
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A parking space in Manhattan costs as much as rent in other places
source: rep-am.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this wall
source: static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Palladium)
 
 
 
If the police find you stuck in someone's driveway with a car full of their stuff, you can't make your problems go away by telling the cops, "We better take it back inside the house so we won't be charged with theft"
source: pal-item.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Impact Lab)
 
 
 
How getting undressed reveals your personality
source: impactlab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Scientists take first step towards self-healing spacecraft, would have given more details but Hal didn't feel like opening the pod bay doors at the time
source: washtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
From the who didn't see this coming dept: Website that reviews prostitutes
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
25,000-strong New York Transit workers union rejects contract offer by seven votes. January is a fine month to do a bit of walking
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Wrongfully convicted man for twenty-one years awarded $100 for every day he was behind bars. No word on his 401K plan
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wral.com)
 
 
 
Singapore court spares transsexual drug dealer from caning because law prevents women from suffering that punishment
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
There once was a jihadist from Nantucket
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
Man who failed large vehicle driving test, then wrote letter to driving center saying he would scatter nails over training course, arrested for just that
source: mdn.mainichi-msn.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Impact Lab)
 
 
 
Hydropolis - The world's first underwater hotel under construction in Dubai. For people who like to sleep in wet beds
source: impactlab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these jump ropers
source: sometimes.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contra Costa Times)
 
 
 
Camel jumps out of trailer at 55 mph, bounces to safety
source: contracostatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Aftenposten.no)
 
 
 
Moonshine still explodes in Norway housing row
source: aftenposten.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Discovery)
 
 
 
MIT architect takes treehouses to a whole new level
source: dsc.discovery.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri January 20, 2006
(starmagazine.com)
 
 
 
Jennifer Love Hewitt is going to pose for Playboy to confirm her boobies are good
source: starmagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Venezuela plans to go on "buying spree." Intends to take advantage of "buy 3 tanks, get 1 free" special offer and buy as many rocket-propelled grenades as possible, 'cause they are, like, soooo in this season
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Cannabist)
 
 
 
Doctor Who makes it to America
source: scifi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
The 2006 elections will be a terrorist attack on American voters
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Willy Wonka)
 
 
 
Did anybody else have mental images of Oomp Loompas rebuilding New Orleans?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman succumbs to injuries suffered from dropping a banana on her leg. Gwen Stefani seen mumbling and shaking her head
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
200 square foot shed on Ireland's coast put on market for 120,000 euros
source: today.reuters.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Banker faces firing after email of his sex life spread round the world, along with his new nickname, "Immi the pimp daddy"
source: news.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lebowski 3:5)
 
 
 
The Dude continues to abide
source: lebowskifest.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCVB)
 
 
 
If you're going to use the phony bomb technique to rob a bank, make sure the bag doesn't have your name and address written inside it
source: thebostonchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Reporter tries to use false references to expose poor screening, but turns out the screening isn't so poor after all. Said reporter is arrested
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Contraceptives taken by injection made obese test subjects fatter, more likely to be rolled in flour
source: today.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
First Reese Witherspoon, now Natalie Portman. Oh noes Golden globes dress trifecta is now in play
source: stylescenes.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Indianapolis Colts raise prices of tickets, presumably to cover the cost of heimlich maneuver classes
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
The "dead body guy" who set up a Web site promoting himself to play a corpse in TV or movies has actually landed a job playing a corpse in a movie
source: thestate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
This just in: All that junk we've been dumping in space for the last 40 years isn't cleaning itself up
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Man says Howard Stern show isn't worth paying for, rebroadcasts it on the Internet
source: business.bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Netscape)
 
 
 
"Oh crap," said the man after realizing the door to the public toilet he was using had been frozen shut
source: cnn.netscape.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these four horsemen into an appropriate apocalypse
source: talkingproud.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Iran's president meets with anti-Israel militants in Syria, shuns the "pro-Israel" militants and endures an awkward moment of silence with the Jews for Jesus Militants in the hallway waiting for the elevator
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
Finally getting revenge, Lexington bank sues Christian Laettner for default on a loan. Duke sucks
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Creators of "Lost" discover that the internet can be used to promote television shows and further interact with fans. Ric Romero on the scene
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Dead man rides NYC subway for six hours before being discovered. Witnesses thought nothing of overly-friendly man on train
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Last week, failed pope assassin Mehmet Ali Agca got out of jail free. Guess who just rolled triple doubles?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Netscape)
 
 
 
Despite what you might see in the movies or read on Fark, pound-me-in-the-ass prisons are not so PMITA, according to a new study
source: channels.netscape.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Winchester Rifle company to close doors. Morticians relieved, tired of having to pry them out of cold, dead hands
source: today.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Jack Abramoff's father sends scathing letter to George Clooney in response to the actor's televised remarks about his son's name. The letter was also signed by his other son, Beat
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Media latches on to another mining accident. Sharks unimpressed, waiting for warmer weather
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ben Maller)
 
 
 
NFL superstars caught in handicapped parking spaces
source: benmaller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Ohmigod, it's like, the stupid biatch already wore my dress to the awards, so like, I am going to so biatch slap her for sure
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NCBuy)
 
 
 
Medicaid spending overtakes education. It'll be a great day when schools get all the money they need, and old people hold bake sales to buy walkers
source: kevxml2a.infospace.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBCSanDiego)
 
 
 
$2,700 toilet seat stolen. Police have nothing to go on
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Teen gets recipe off the Internet for hallucinogenic tea. What could possibly go wrong?
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Jessica Simpson's best friends? Why, her sweater puppies, of course
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Judges on "Dancing With the Stars" show bias and unfair judging practices. Oh my god, someone call the... oh, wait. It's a goddamn TV show
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gainesville Sun)
 
 
 
The University of Florida requires that domestic partners swear that they are having sex before being granted benefits. In other news, some freshman girl claims the football team as her domestic partner
source: gainesville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Woman leaves $1.1 million estate to help pay off national debt
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Hip Brooklyn neighborhood freaks out with the rumored arrival of barbarians. Yep, McDonald's and Starbucks may be opening up
source: nynewsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Ford Motor Company to be saved by ugly-ass mini-van (with pic)
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Iran, continuing its blind march toward World War III, moves foreign assets to shield them from inevitable U.N. sanctions
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Whale spotted on the Thames in central London. No word if whale has spotted dick
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Columbia Tribune)
 
 
 
Subway's Jared blames his former weight gain on his Nintendo. His 300-pound chocolate Nintendo
source: columbiatribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCCO)
 
 
 
Minnesota town paralyzed by milk-truck crash because in Minnesota, milk is considered a "hazardous material"
source: wcco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Happy birthday, Reaganomics: It's the 25th anniversary of the greatest economic miracle in American history
source: opinionjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Brazilian woman arrested for arranging hits on co-workers so she could get job next to man she loved
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Chinese company purchases Wham-O. Be on the look out for reissues of your favorites, hurra-hoop, sirry string and srip and sride
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Woman, blind for 25 years, recovers sight after having a heart attack
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Iwon)
 
 
 
Red Sox boy genius Theo Epstein ends 10-week vacation, returns to Boston. Heard mumbling something about morans letting Johnny Damon go to Evil Empire
source: sports.iwon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
In a stunning turn of events, the fan Antonio Davis accosted on Wednesday is planning on suing
source: cbs2chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NCBuy)
 
 
 
CIA verifies Bin Laden's voice on tape, although Furby failed to recognize it
source: kevxml2a.infospace.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Osama bin Laden's threats cause oil prices to rise. Oil companies apparently starting to build giant walls of $50s around their refineries for protection
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NY Daily News)
 
 
 
Google to Justice Department: Suck it
source: news.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
AudioEdit the final showdown between the King of Rock and the King of Pop
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Theme: A pineapple, a toilet and the color red
source: img.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(lifehack.org)
 
 
 
The average desk harbors 400 times more bacteria than the average toilet seat
source: lifehack.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Wine drinkers choose healthier foods, beer drinkers choose easier foods and hard-liquor drinkers just crawl in the bottle
source: today.reuters.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Japan announces plans to let women ascend to the throne, but they can't complain about the seat being left up when they get there
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Secret Service and DOJ raid home of boy who hacked his teacher's email account. The Smoking Gun is there
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Woman sues serial killer for gender bias
source: newkerala.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contact Music)
 
 
 
Peaches Geldof complains about hellish life as celebrity daughter with ridiculous name. Breaks down while discussing 1996, when Presidents of the USA rode to top of charts
source: contactmusic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Clarke County Democrat)
 
 
 
Minister arrested after ruckus at jail. Claims that he has a nationally known, but permanently dead, lawyer on the phone
source: clarkecountydemocrat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Fort Lauderdale okays 3,000 more units for downtown, 15 percent of which to be "affordable"
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Today's "newsroom going into lockdown because someone got mad at reporter for calling old man a Q-Tip" story brought to you by Knoxville, TN
source: wate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this silly walking guy
source: static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Police put PETA pork protester with pasties in the pokey
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Strange Edgar Allan Poe birthday ritual disrupted by rubberneckers
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCTV5)
 
 
 
Woman defends herself against two gun-toting robbers by hitting one in the face with her shoe and honking her car horn
source: kctv5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu January 19, 2006
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Lawyer argues that burglary defendant has suffered enough after entire planet learns that gang of elderly people pretty much beat the snot out of him. Judge begs to differ
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Authorities apologize to farmer after speed camera clocks his tractor doing 85 mph. Farmer accepts, plows acre in six minutes, speeds up three miles per hour, winds up in Hill Valley
source: news.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Woman shocked after getting electrical bill for $250 million from power company. Chagrined company admits its error, but says it only needs one person to pay a bill like this for their elaborate scheme to work
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Sequel to children's classic book "Peter Pan" is completed in extreme secrecy. Publisher will only confirm the title and that the phrase, "Tinkerbell, you ignorant slut," appears nowhere in the story
source: today.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Caption this fast dog
source: static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
French winemakers pay $40,000 for 340-year-old oak tree to make barrels for their wine. The screw caps will be made from an ancient Citroen in Marseilles
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
$150-million laser experiment will mimic massive nuclear explosion. What could possibly go wrong?
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
My milkshake sends all the boys to the morgue
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Supreme Court upholds obscene yogurt ruling. If squirting nude models with yogurt is wrong, then I don't want to be right
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times Herald)
 
 
 
High school art teacher suspended for suggesting students add nudes to their portfolio, offering private lessons
source: recordonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Girl throws bottle with note into a British bay, gets reply from Australia
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Crime Scene KC)
 
 
 
Woman calls the cops on a leaf
source: blogs.kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
France threatens nuclear retaliation on terrorist sponsors
source: news.independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Earth and Sky)
 
 
 
Being an astronaut is cooler than you thought: They get to see the auroras from a stunning vantage point (pic)
source: earthsky.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farm and Ranch)
 
 
 
"If properly bonded, most donkeys will think the sheep are theirs and will fight to the death over them"
source: farmandranchguide.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Study finds most college seniors aren't prepared for life in the real world. Suggestions to solve this include more real world training in college or creating more jobs that require quarter-bounce/beer-pong skills
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IDLYITW)
 
 
 
Britney switches from Kabbalah to Hinduism. Perhaps she should try Buddhism -- they actually worship the fat
source: idontlikeyouinthatway.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby monkey being raised by keeper at Taronga Zoo, has his own stuffed duck (with pic)
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Realizing it's responsible for the only good movies they've released in the last decade, Disney in talks to purchase Pixar
source: today.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Russian zoo plans to combat freezing winter by getting their monkeys drunk
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Cylon)
 
 
 
New Starbuck tells old Starbuck to frack off: "I've now played this character longer... shut up"
source: battlestargalactica-online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marines)
 
 
 
U.S. forces kick butt in Operation Red Bull, to be followed up by Operation Frito Pie, Opeartion Taco Bell Value Menu and Operation 7-11 Cherry Slurpee Only 99¢
source: marines.mil   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Winn-Dixie asks bankruptcy judge if they can award CEO $2 million bonus for closing hundreds of stores. Thousands of ex-employees wonder if he takes paper or plastic
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Nurse shortage means hard times ahead for hospitals, porn
source: dayton.bizjournals.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Hairdoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop these Jersey boys
source: img10.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Man loses left arm in factory accident, 20 years after he lost the right one in an accident at the same factory. The Sun is there to ask, "Are our workers learning?"
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Lowest recorded temperatures since 1927 have killed over 20 people in Russia. Global warming, my ass
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Good news: The next five years will bring us the biggest financial boom in history. The bad news, worst economic decline since the Great Depression to follow
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Herald)
 
 
 
There's another reason besides Fark that you only get 11 minutes of work done in a day
source: theherald.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WDSU.com)
 
 
 
Doctors worried that face transplant recipient may have rejection issues. Apparently, the donor face was a non-smoker
source: wdsu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Cleveland named most intelligent city for 2006. Suck it, Cambridge
source: intelligentcommunity.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Michael Bolton hints at engagement to Nicollette Sheridan. However, she's unlikely to change her last name, because he's the one who sucks
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Iceland the first country that will try to abandon gasoline
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Australian upper-atmosphere experiment aims to solve biggest climate riddle: "Is America ready to stop destroying the environment yet?"
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Police dismayed to discover that their in-car modems cause interference with the computers at the local donut shop
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NCBuy)
 
 
 
Radio station's "Freak my Ride" winner angry that auto shop pimped her '86 pickup beyond driveability
source: kevxml2a.infospace.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Wilson Pickett dead at 64, now floating up to the "Land of the 1,000 Dances"
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
U.S. Army raises enlistment age to 40, plans on deploying older soldiers to lawn guarding duties
source: politicalgateway.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(katu.com)
 
 
 
Dumb: Getting a DUI. Really Dumb: Two DUI's in one night. Fark.com: The same cop catches you both times in one night
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Rachel Ray and Mario Batali take on Bobby Flay and Giada de Laurentiis in Iron Chef. Mario and Bobby agree on menu: Naked Female Chef Casserole
source: et.tv.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Woman takes out full page ad in newspaper seeking men to have sex with to cure her cancer. "The ideal candidate would need to have sex with me every two days for at least a year"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pioneer Press)
 
 
 
When your BMW's motor blows up you a.) Take it to a mechanic. b.) Junk it & buy a new one. c.) Bury it & collect the insurance money
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Edmunds.com)
 
 
 
Woman busted for posing nude on Dodge Challenger concept in Detroit. "We want people to love these cars, but not in that way"
source: edmunds.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSYR)
 
 
 
Thief breaks into same pub three times on Friday the 13th; steals $17, booze, burgers and a gallon of relish
source: 9wsyr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Holly Hunter has twins at 47. Plans to name them both Nathan Jr.
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Worship in the nude does more harm than good
source: thestatesman.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Burglar escaping police jumps 20 feet from church bell tower to roof of nearby building, an escape made only slightly less impressive when firefighters had to bring in a bucket truck to rescue him from it
source: buzzpage.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Osama says U.S. attack plans already underway, but will be halted if truce is called with Muslim nations
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
"I have thought about dropping a nuclear bomb on Sydney since Jelena lost in the first round this week, for which Australia is to blame"
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Doc offers to trade a vasectomy for Broncos tickets
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Did you catch those smooth-singing twins from Memphis on Tuesday's "American Idol"? Yeah, so did the cops
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Scientists open Stardust capsule. Wayne Newton reportedly nauseous, disoriented
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(nbc4.com)
 
 
 
Man surprised to see laughing police officer sitting on hood of speeding patrol car (with photos)
source: nbc4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Katu Portland)
 
Video
 
Dumb: After nearly being run over, man stands in front of city bus in protest, demanding apology. Dumber: Bus rider gets off bus to kick protestor's ass. Fark.com: Driver then lets man back on bus and drives away
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hindu)
 
 
 
Man puts arc-welder to giant rocket engine he found, with expected results
source: hindu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
e ≠ mc²
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contra Costa Times)
 
 
 
Your kid's not a spoiled, self-centered brat -- he's an "Indigo child"
source: contracostatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
The art of debate on contentious issues is not dead -- unlike the 20-ton dead whale that Greenpeace left on the steps of this Japanese embassy (with pic)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(samurai-sam.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this farking farker inside a big farking tire
source: samurai-sam.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(11Alive)
 
 
 
Upscale boutique offers free beer while you shop for $150 jeans. A novel idea
source: 11alive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes.com)
 
 
 
Swiss elevator company to cut 115 jobs, citing rising costs. Employees attempt to lift spirits, aware employment at company had some ups and downs
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
British cartoon "Fireman Sam" meant to teach kids about fire safety, but gives another lesson entirely when an episode shows him tossing bucket of water on an electrical fire. Hilarity is ensuing
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Your Sewickley)
 
 
 
School to avoid fan brawling by playing basketball game in front of invited audience only. There, fixed that
source: yoursewickley.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Town baffled by thousand of dead mullet washing up on its shores, noting it may mean business at the front but there's certainly no party in the back
source: nst.com.my   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Laurence Fishburne sued by ex-assistant because she was pregnant and single. Too bad she didn't take the blue pill
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
 
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 37: "Snow & Ice." Link goes to next week's contest. Please read first post
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed January 18, 2006
(Guardian)
 
 
 
How two Santas, scheming in a bar over where their next pint of beer was coming from, turned into a national security alert in England
source: society.guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
NFL ref Pete Morelli has large rock thrown through living room window. Vandalizer sure to use challenge flag upon arrest
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Sixteen-year-old Illinois student expelled from high school for doodling gang sign "D.L.K." in his notebook. The student's name is Derek Leon Kelly
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Flaming chainsaw recalled
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7)
 
 
 
Ric Romero discovers mail-order movie-rental services
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"Arrested Development," "Malcolm In The Middle" and "That 70's Show" canceled
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
School board to eliminate valedictorian honor because it's hard work
source: tampabays10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Researchers list France's stinkiest cheeses. Here comes the smelly science
source: cranfield.ac.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Amazing1)
 
 
 
For $11,000, you can own a 400 Joule 1.8 Gigawatt EMP shockwave generator
source: amazing1.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Ben Franklin understood the need for secrecy in matters of national security
source: opinionjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cut-out guy
source: static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
A whole load of superheroes just found themselves out of a job
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Are you man enough for "Boyz Night" knitting group?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
A recipe for Guinness ice cream? Brilliant!
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Pope's first encyclical due this month. Pope regrets screwing around most of the semester
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
New study from the University of the Obvious discovers that men find pleasure in seeing bad people suffer
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Caption these amateur hunters
source: i15.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
It takes a special kind of incompetence to misplace a 38-ton steel sculpture. Meet the museum that was able to pull it off
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Straight out of a soap opera: Sole survivor of Sago mine collapse begins to awake from coma. Evil twin brother to debut during Sweeps Week
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Aussies claim ion space engine breakthrough
source: scienceblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man doesn't know what's more upsetting: That police arrested him and took him to jail, or that they left his two-month-old baby behind in his car
source: islingtongazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Former teen idol discovers that it's a good idea to spring for that subway ticket, especially when carrying crack
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Dutch TV cancels reality show based on life of a pornstar. Deze draad is waardeloos zonder beelden
source: today.reuters.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
It may only be a matter of time before the IRS taxes the virtual gold and items you find in online games
source: news.com.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Thanks to a new resolution in Kanab, Utah, houses aren't considered "homes" unless you possess a "quiver of children"
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(1010WINS)
 
 
 
Investigating reports of a traffic jam in a sleepy Pennsylvania town, police were surprised to see that the culprit was a dead, four-foot-long iguana
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Pseudo-scorpion species found in California. There are unconfirmed reports that scientist have also discovered a quasi-Def Leppard in New Jersey
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
In hindsight, taking a taxi from the bank after robbing it wasn't the brightest thing to do
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Week)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Offshoring call center jobs. New hotness: Homeshoring them. The next available soccer mom will be with you shortly
source: businessweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
NASA postpones Pluto mission for second day due to...*shakes Magic 8 Ball*..."power failures in Maryland"
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
U.S. will release female detainees, per terrorist requests
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Goose poop bamboozles boom town. Sluice to loose the deuce?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
All right stop, collaborate and listen / Ice is back for a new intoxication / There's no problem you'll adore it / Check out the booze while the bartender pours it
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Near rioting occurs in Trinidad when some wireless provider offers "buy one, get one free" on cell phones. "The Network" commercials by Verizon suddenly seem almost scary
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Cat wakes owner, saves her and her granddaughter from flames that were about to engulf their mobile home
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Showing their education not wasted, pair of recent college grads each win $5,000 at beer-pong championship
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Hilary Swank hopes to save marriage; promises to thank husband at "one of these here award shows"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Firefighter gives birth to baby girl, takes firefighter exam 12 hours later and passes
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
There's not many things scarier than a crazed pregnant teenager armed with a chainsaw, axe and machete
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Increasing number of couples marrying at airport, plan to join mile-high club en route to honeymoon
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Syracuse.com)
 
 
 
Man charged with DUI after finding himself unable to explain to police how his SUV ended up balancing on four-foot-high brick wall
source: syracuse.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
Yo ho Oh no! Porn shot at pirate ship
source: tbt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop the card sent by Brad Pitt to Jennifer Aniston, which was apparently lost in the mail, letting her know that he's impregnated Angelina Jolie. And for anything else he also forgot to tell her
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Catholic Church not entirely pleased that Jesus Christ wearing earphones is used to sell beer
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4 Devner)
 
 
 
Look, up in the sky! It's a bird! It's a plane! It's a... moose?
source: cbs4denver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tonight.co.za)
 
 
 
Tracking down phony phallus for Golden Globe winner was hard, took long and nearly caused stroke
source: tonight.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(donga.com)
 
 
 
"Hello, my name is Jae-hwan, and I'll be your oppressor today"
source: english.donga.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Alaskan volcano cam
source: avo.alaska.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror)
 
 
 
British court rules haircuts can be assault. It's nothing you didn't already suspect if you've ever been to Supercuts
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Malaria-detecting watch invented. So if you ask someone the time and they run screaming down the street after looking at their watch, you'll know why
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Man applies for and gets public legal aid despite winning £10 million in a 2002 lottery
source: today.reuters.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Police respond to call of man asleep at wheel in Wendy's drive-thru. Man endears self to law enforcement by waking up and demanding "five double cheeseburgers and a frosty" from police
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WVGazette)
 
 
 
Investigators discover movie- and music-pirating operation in basement office in West Virginia state capitol
source: wvgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The pornification of public spaces
source: skidmore.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IOL.co.za)
 
 
 
Good Samaritan helps road accident victim; wakes up in hospital bed several hours later, next to man he'd helped
source: int.iol.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FunReports)
 
 
 
Sexual orientation determines what people would they do if they unexpectedly received $100,000
source: funreports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this delicate balancing act
source: icecube.wisc.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Mallcop forces disabled man to crawl to car rather than use a borrowed wheelchair
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Australia continues its proud tradition of creative prison escapes. If you can't talk the guard into letting you go, just diet your way out
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Onion)
 
 
 
Sean Penn demands to know what asshole took SeanPenn@gmail.com
source: theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Bus driver fired for being Wiccan. Gubernatorial-candidate vampire husband to sue for religious discrimination
source: kstp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(opera.com)
 
 
 
Timing is everything: Explosion photo gallery
source: my.opera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Patriots name new defensive coordinator. Emergency urinals to be installed on sidelines
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Wot does tigers eat?"
source: krhunt.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
World's first "maglev" elevator should ready by 2008. Scientists pointed out the biggest problem in making such a device was how they got the doors to make that cool "shhh-ing" when opening and closing
source: mdn.mainichi-msn.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Rumors swirl that tennis pros Andy Roddick and Maria Sharapova are a couple. No word if he's lobbing his drop shot into her backcourt
source: msn.foxsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Laser-projected keyboard. Sharks not included
source: iwantoneofthose.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
UK refuses to show "South Park" episode featuring closeted Tom Cruise threatening to sue writers "in England." The Sun is there
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IOL.co.za)
 
 
 
Stolen corvette recovered 37 years later. Dusty Springfield 8-track still in player
source: int.iol.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(McCall.com)
 
 
 
Restaurant patrons not amused when they glance outside to see teen displaying the vertical smile. What an ass
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue January 17, 2006
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Cleveland Browns fan, who ran onto field during Steelers-Browns game, sentenced to spend Super Bowl weekend in jail
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
How much to you hate parking inspectors? Enough to break into their offices and urinate into their helmets? These guys did
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
U.S. says WMD terrorist attack threat "very high." Sets terror alert system to "Election Year"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Okay, I'm going to rob you for gas money. By the way, I'm staying in room 126 of the motel across the street
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
UFO cult offers job to disgraced South Korean cloning scientist, because credibility is not an issue in certain fields
source: today.reuters.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HelenaIR.com)
 
 
 
Captain Kirk pilots kidney stone through Urethra system, boldly goes to GoldenPalace.com for $25,000
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Iraqi kidnappers set 72 hour deadline for their demands
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Canada Post refused to deliver Sex Party's political leaflets. In other news, Canada has a Sex Party
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Cheeky Aussie man is now the butt of jokes after being busted for trying to catch a cab wearing a suit coat and a purple g-string
source: thecouriermail.news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contact Music)
 
 
 
Kate Beckinsale thinks she has a fat ass (U.S. version). Kate Beckinsale thinks she has a fat arse (UK version). Kate Beckinsale fapfapfap (Fark version)
source: contactmusic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
After bashing Samuel Alito for belonging to a Princeton club that discriminates against women, Teddy Kennedy decides to end his own membership in Harvard club that discriminates against women
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
What is Drew Barrymore trying to tell Steven Spielberg at the Golden Globes?
source: content.hfpa.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Farmer's markets of the universe tremble with fear: Florida wants it's own private spaceport
source: cbs4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Five ways to tell if you're rich and retarded
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canadians getting dangerously fatter. Most too high to care, others contemplating switch from bacon to seal
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"I was determined when the NASA proctologist looked up my ass, he would see pipes so dazzling he would ask the nurse to get his sunglasses"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Statesman)
 
 
 
You don't need a million dollars to have a threesome in Britain
source: thestatesman.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this twig
source: static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Researchers determine that meetings are bad for you
source: education.guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
When the Royal Navy gives you a secret file that requires a security clearance to read, try not to leave it behind at the pub
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If you live near Augustine Volcano in Alaska, you might want to put on your ashhats
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Colombian drug lord's son was going back to Cali, to Cali, to Cali he was going back to Cali, DEA don't think so
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
House Republicans unveil new ethics plan. Said to be modeled after the "throwing deck chairs off the Titanic to prevent it from sinking" plan
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
NASA launch has been scrubbed due to -- *shakes magic 8-ball* -- "strong winds"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Child actor from two "Beethoven" movies missing. Police think he may be de-composing, mother reponds "that's unheard of"
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Brittany Murphy gets engaged to Bruce Willis
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Seattle pastor calls for Microsoft boycott due to gay civil rights support. I see you're pushing a personal agenda -- would you like help with this agenda?
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Dumb: Man smokes crack while driving on the freeway and falls asleep. Dumber: He doesn't wake up when the police ram his car to get it to stop. Fark: This isn't the first time that he did it
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Newt Gingrich also compared the House to a plantation and said that he was leading the "slave rebellion"
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TaxProf)
 
 
 
Would you hire this guy? President Clinton's suspension as a lawyer ends on Thursday
source: taxprof.typepad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCCO)
 
 
 
In Taiwan, owners take their pets to fortune tellers to find out what life has in store for them. Your dog foresees steak
source: wcco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Pittsburgh Steeler fan has heart attack after Bettis fumble (and probably 14 bratwursts)
source: sportsillustrated.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
VideoEdit
 
Put your own pets to good use by having them re-enact famous movie scenes or significant moments in history, but please don't harm them during the making of your film. Due Jan. 17th
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Three million men related to a single Irish king named Fb-
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Dentist allows her unqualified boyfriend perform dental operations. What could possibly go wrong?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Channel)
 
 
 
Forty years ago today, the U.S. lost an H-bomb in Spain, namely from a plane
source: historychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsnet5)
 
 
 
If you own a cell phone, you're paying a three percent tax to help fund the 1898 Spanish-American War
source: newsnet5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NY Daily News)
 
 
 
Hillary compares the House of Representatives to a plantation on MLK Day. Republican leaders waste little time showing what could possibly go wrong
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Humor Feed)
 
 
 
2005 Satire Awards announced
source: humorfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
City officials become suspicious of seedy bar in high-rent neighborhood which opens at random hours to sell warm beer in cans after noticing that the owners have been dead for several years
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
German police follow thief's trail of feathers from ripped jacket; plucked from home, man's goose is cooked and he's going down
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Man spots his own skis on eBay; thief nabbed. Feedback bound to be negative
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Maine woman has world's largest collection of owl memorabilia. YA RLY
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
A curious religious debate raging in Egypt: Should you keep your clothes on when having sex?
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Theme: Take a modern movie or TV show and promote it using 70s-style design sensibilities
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Clinton Portis)
 
 
 
Clinton Portis details the lives of his characters, says any typos are the fault of the magical copy-editing pixie who lives under his bed
source: clintonportis.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
NewsFlash
 
Supreme court rules in favor of Oregon's assisted-suicide law
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Tar Heel)
 
 
 
Duke ekes out 3,688-3,444 victory over rival North Carolina in longest basketball game of all time. Duke sucks
source: dailytarheel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCBS)
 
 
 
Today's "idiot mysteriously stuck in a chimney" story brought to you by Van Nuys, California (with video)
source: cbs2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Today's "NFL playoff-bound team member jailed on domestic violence charges" is brought to you by the Seattle Seahawks
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Having TV in bedroom halves your sex life. Having "Star Trek: Enterprise" box-set takes care of the other half
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
NY Jets plan to save on shaving-cream costs next season by hiring a head coach barely old enough to shave
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IrieRadio.com)
 
 
 
Drew will talk Fark on the Rude Awakening Show at 9:45 EST. Call in at 1-877-723-9626 to discuss important topics, like the Flying Spaghetti Monster, Ric Romero or intoxication
source: irieradio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Woman takes out murder contract on herself. Killer fails. She sues, would-be killer pays her $3500, as he failed to keep up his end of the contract
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Army warns soldiers going to Iraq that if they're killed wearing body armor they bought themselves, their next of kin won't be eligible for death benefits
source: sftt.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Forbes releases the top 100 most loved spokes-creatures. Talking M&Ms topped the list. Photoshop what the bottom of the list looks like
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Regular jail break: Hiding in the laundry van. Expert jail break: Tunneling under the wall. Fark.com jail break: Walk up to the guard, convince him you've got a work permit, then walk out the gate
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Cop who had sex with his girfriend in back seat of cruiser fired after handcuffed suspects complained they always had to sit on the wet spot
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Hungry Guy)
 
 
 
Creative artwork made from stacked food cans. Homeless shelter field trip to exhibit planned for next Tuesday
source: funmansion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Man's class ring recovered after being at the bottom of Lake Erie for 47 years. Will end up lost in the bottom of a drawer by next week
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Man -- who set out to show the world you can eat unhealthy food for every meal and get away with it -- dies at age 20
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
Idiot decides to remove bullet in his chest with the pointy end of a meat thermometer
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(China Broadcast)
 
 
 
Chinese 1418 map of America way cooler than expected, offers two free appetizers with orders over $20
source: en.chinabroadcast.cn   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Edmonton Sun)
 
 
 
Toy plane crashes, sparking massive reponse by police and paramedics
source: edmontonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Good news: Doctors have finally discovered a function for the appendix. Bad news: It involves the storage of consumed bird shot
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TimesOnline.com)
 
 
 
Japanese scientists plan to drill three times further down than has ever been done before, ignoring the lessons of "Godzilla" and "The X-Files"
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
See what the most popular radio stations in your area are
source: arbitron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Doctors say the tumor they removed from man's back was actually the 35-year-old embryo of his unborn brother
source: mosnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IC Wales)
 
 
 
Drinkers forgiven for spilling their pints when they saw a troop of Cybermen marching outside a pub (with pics of the new Cybermen)
source: icwales.icnetwork.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wkyt.com)
 
 
 
Police find intoxicated woman in car; was reported driving erratically, but don't worry: Her 11-year-old niece was sitting on pillows and driving at the time
source: wkyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTHR)
 
 
 
Operating a meth lab in your home, getting drunk and exposing yourself in public are perfectly acceptable if you're friends with the police commissioner
source: wthr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Asia1.com)
 
 
 
New craze in Russia is to spend tons of cash on practical jokes that, for all intents and purposes, should earn the pranker a major-league ass whooping
source: newpaper.asia1.com.sg   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon January 16, 2006
(London Times)
 
 
 
Woman's parrot reveals her affair when it said "I love you, Gary," in her voice and made sloppy kissy noises whenever it heard that name on TV. The big-mouthed parrot trifecta is now in play
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Europe has built a $1.21 billion space station but has no way of getting it into space
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Top ten wackiest conspiracy theories
source: 2spare.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Avril Lavigne to appear at the 2006 Olympic Winter Games, presumably as a member of the Canadian women's KHITBASH team
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Prisoner gives his cellmate a beating, then takes a Kool-Aid break
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Cars run over man on Interstate 4, keep driving (with video)
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Danish artist discovers stiff penal enforcement after "pretending" to urinate in public
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I hate Derhrooz)
 
 
 
Offical "24" season premiere discussion thread part 2
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Robber learns the hard way that you shouldn't target famous cartoonists, as they can produce really kick-ass police sketches
source: sundaytimes.news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 4)
 
 
 
Police investigating report of assault discover man with wooden stake driven through his neck. Mr. Magoo the Vampire Slayer wanted for questioning
source: nbc4.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter