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Sun January 04, 2004
(FilmJerk.com)
 
 
 
Script review of Milla Jovovich's Next, a vampire film
source: filmjerk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Girl Scouts prepping bug army to protect their camp in insect war. We bow to our new insect overlords
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
Boobies
 
DOMAI models. Not safe for work
source: girlnextdoor.tv
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Turns out there is one thing that Africa does very well. And the U.S. is damned if it will let them get away with it
source: ghanaweb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox.com)
 
 
 
Fox to launch My Big Fat Annoying Fiance in a couple weeks. Greeks surrender
source: fox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Hundreds of Spaniard freak-out after fireballs streak across sky, crash to earth. Jordy Verril screams, "Meteor shiat"
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
"Return of the King" keeps No. 1 spot
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some CHUD)
 
 
 
Slinky: The Movie. Hollywood really is out of ideas this time
source: chud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
TSG is there -- Britney Spears' marriage license
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop farker and his buddy eating sand at the beach
source: tinani.c7f.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Chef sues hotel for not warning him that avocados may be ripe
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Here comes the world's tallest flagpole that can be seen 20 miles away. Cellphone towers surrender
source: accessnorthga.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SignOnSanDiego)
 
 
 
Man calls 911 to report clerk refusing to return his stolen credit card. Man arrested
source: signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
Extraterrestrial from the planet Rizq goes on trial for child molesting
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Affleck nearly beheaded by Yemeni prince. Better luck next time
source: sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Afghanistan grand council finally agrees on a constitution. It's a compromise that no one's happy with, proving that democratic ideals have truly been established
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wisinfo.com)
 
 
 
Having felt the same frustration as the rest of us, boy increases odds of winning by crawling inside claw-grabber stuffed animal game (with picture)
source: chippewa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Boulder police break up outdoor prayer service
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
Police, investigating burglary, find home owner's drug lab. Does anybody keep track of how often this happens?
source: sptimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Sports winners and losers today. Talk about them here
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
AudioEdit a cop explaining why marijuana should be illegal
source: amazon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Airports to start fingerprinting, tracking foreigners Monday
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky News)
 
NewsFlash
 
New bin Laden tape aired on Al-Jazeera
source: sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Honolulu Advertiser)
 
 
 
$1.99 wine has the rest of the wine industry sucking sour grapes
source: the.honoluluadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Astro Guy)
 
 
 
Amateur takes stunning shot of Orion nebula. Hubble hasn't surrendered but was last seen drinking heavily
source: robgendlerastropics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Post)
 
 
 
The biggest threat to development in Colorado is a three-inch mouse
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Google expected to make stock market debut in the first half of 2004
source: news.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Ohioan)
 
 
 
Ohio giving special license plates to DUI offenders. Photoshop a better plate for DUIs and for other public offenses
source: images.ibsys.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Icewine grape harvest looks good thanks to freezing Northwest weather
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Mars Lander pics
source: marsrovers.nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TriCities.com)
 
 
 
While looking for farmers market, 80-year-old crashes through busy salon instead
source: tricities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
New York bank robbery rate up 64 percent in 2003
source: contracostatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Big blue bird chases skateboard punks after fowl attack
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Researchers find peeling an apple stimulates the most highly evolved section of your brain
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Post)
 
 
 
Two geriatric cowboys spend their retirement designing crooked furniture. Both are amazed that people actually buy it
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Playbill.com)
 
 
 
Fark favorite Alyson Hannigan set to star opposite Luke Perry in stage version of When Harry Met Sally
source: playbill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Bar patron shoots dog, jukebox and telephone. Typical day in Montana, where there isn't anything to do but drink
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twin Cities.com)
 
 
 
Place a penny on your tongue. If your tongue can stuff it up a nostril, you will live a rich and full life
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ArkansasNBC.com)
 
 
 
Sword-wielding shopkeeper scares suspected serial stealer
source: arkansasnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Britney's marriage being anulled already
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Darwin Awards)
 
 
 
Genius boy scout microwaves neighborhood, self
source: darwinawards.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lexmark)
 
 
 
Photoshop the Lexmark CEO
source: lexmark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
BCS officials refuse to deliberate changing to playoff system, thereby assuring fans another year of polling maddness
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Wheat, sheep and extra-long blades to power the future
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Drug bust nets high school math teacher
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
NewsFlash
 
Mars Lander phones home after successful landing
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PFL)
 
NewsFlash
 
Britney Spears marries high school sweetheart in Vegas
source: pornforlosers.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Crackpot)
 
 
 
Conspiracies-a-go-go. Grab your tin-foil hats and watch for the black helicopters
source: propagandamatrix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat January 03, 2004
(AP)
 
 
 
IRS targets 800 IRS employees for tax audits
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Zombie)
 
 
 
Bothered by zombies? You need not worry anymore
source: fvza.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
A century of pisswater beer: Miller High Life turns 100
source: gazetteextra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ledger-Enquirer)
 
 
 
If you're going to impress your girlfriend by cooking for her, don't set her balcony on fire
source: ledger-enquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
UConn women's basketball home-win streak ends at 69. Duke still sucks
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
NBA refs mistakenly toss Piston's Coach Larry Brown. Brown refuses to come back on the court
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Nasa Mars Rover set to land tonight, finally figured out how to convert from metric to imperial
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Speed Demon)
 
 
 
The best radar detectors you can buy, tested head to head
source: motortrend.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wausaudailyherald.com)
 
 
 
Four million animals given as gifts expected to be dropped of at animal shelters. Your dog wants more life, asshat
source: wausaudailyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Angelina Jolie building a house in Cambodia and distributing cows
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Gruesome details emerging from Egyptian Boeing 737 recovery effort
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Rush guitarist speaks out about arrest, says it was unfair. Police say don't annoy us further, we have our work to do; Forget about your silly whim. It doesn't fit the Plan
source: ap.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
AudioEdit an employee explaining why he/she deserves a raise to the boss
source: getzips.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop a "The Smoking Gun is there" page for something that's bound to happen in 2004
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Hunter trips, dies after his knife accidentally goes off
source: wcfcourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Axe attack involving postal workers. Surprizingly, they were the victims
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Porterville Recorder)
 
 
 
Kid is a model citizen until his dry-ice bomb prank. Now his life is ruined. Suggestions?
source: portervillerecorder.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Car Connection)
 
 
 
Finally, no more "sneak peeks" and "almost real" concept cars. Here's the '05 Mustang in production trim, the first complete makeover since 1979
source: thecarconnection.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
AD&D's Book of Erotic Fantasy is here. Your level-five elf can finally get laid
source: mortality.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Post)
 
 
 
What's really funny is when you go to the grocery store and someone says, "Oh, I didn't recognize you with your clothes on"
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Wisconsin town celebrates New Year with toilet-bowl parade featuring giant throne, plunger scepters
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Korean protestor dressed up as a cow to protest sick beef from USA
source: photo.chinatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(theeyeopener.com)
 
 
 
Girl wins contest for fake orgasms, credits boyfriend for a lot of practice
source: theeyeopener.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Miss Wink charged with stealing 50 glass eyes
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Construction worker tries to avoid swarm of bees on a roof, loses his balance and is impaled on rebar
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(twincities.com)
 
 
 
Teen survives 1,500-foot drop on snowmobile after wrong turn
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NY Daily News)
 
 
 
Britney Spears, Kobe and the Hilton sisters were all in the same Las Vegas bar on New Year's Eve. Al Queda decides to punish U.S. by not flying plane into bar
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Woman drives wrong way on freeway, causes pileup. Police suspect intoxication
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Images of "Croc Hunter" pulling a Jacko and dangling baby over 13-foot crocodile
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Francisco Bowl)
 
 
 
Photoshop a new sponsor for the San Francisco Bowl
source: sfbowl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Chicago and Atlanta fight over which airport is busiest
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tribune)
 
 
 
"Damnit, there's a gopher living in the front yard. Honey, fetch me a shovel and the gunpowder"
source: thnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Swiss carpenters plan to build world's largest bed
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LOC)
 
 
 
150 years ago this week, the U.S. finished buying the land for the lower 48 states. We're saving up to buy Canada next
source: memory.loc.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Kelsey Grammer says he wants to run for U.S. Senate. Cliff Claven to chair campaign
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LFUCG)
 
 
 
Kentuckian arrested for alcohol intoxication... for the 803rd time. Check out lovely mugshot images
source: jail.lfucg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
NewsFlash
 
Egyptian charter jet crashes into Red Sea; 135 on board
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
New MSN Messenger virus offers to help remove itself if you correctly guess what is beween Graham Cluley's toes
source: globetechnology.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Buckeyes win national championship... er... wait, that was last year
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"We are very excited to be hosting a cornhole tournament, one of Cincinnatians' favorite pastimes"
source: usbankarena.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BMJ)
 
 
 
Pic of formerly mentioned tattoo altered during surgery
source: bmj.bmjjournals.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri January 02, 2004
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop Peter Jackson doing the Travolta disco pose
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Meteorite hits Iran
source: reuters.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
The "terrorists" the FBI was looking for on the British Airways flight included a child, a Welsh insurance agent and an old Chinese woman
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Croc Hunter dangles newborn son in front of hungry reptile in absence of hotel balcony
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Albinoblacksheep)
 
 
 
Tired of talking to coworkers? Just leave this animation on your screen whenever you head to coffee break
source: albinoblacksheep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Former British education says most people are too stupid for university, should be stopped from dumbing elites down
source: education.guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hometown Channel)
 
 
 
Doing 100 mph in a Chevrolet Blazer while being chased by the police is scary, attempting to cross a river while doing it is stupid (w/ video)
source: thehometownchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC4)
 
 
 
Home invaders eat hot lead when woman opens fire on them. Gun control nuts say she should have wrestled them into submission
source: nbc4columbus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(iFilm)
 
Boobies
 
Don't bother watching the movie, just check out this clip containing the three best boobie scenes from American Wedding and save time (not safe for work)
source: rd.ifilm.com
 
(WNBC.com)
 
 
 
Drunk man on bus attempts to quiet other passengers by telling them he has a bomb. Hilarity ensues
source: wnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(eBay)
 
 
 
Buy your own half-scale AT-ST Scout Walker
source: cgi.ebay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda)
 
 
 
Tatu to run for president of Russia together
source: newsfromrussia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
NFL MVP 2003: Manning and McNair to share title
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
Boobies
 
Rebecca Gayheart frolics on topless beach, does yoga -- NSFW (site's in Dutch)
source: volkomenkut.com
 
(Arkansas NBC)
 
 
 
Hundreds of inmates flood jail with synchronized flushing
source: arkansasnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mirror)
 
 
 
Man's tattoo altered from "I love women" to "I love men" during surgery
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Six police officers face charges for firing pepper balls into homeless camp to see what would happen
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
AudioEdit airport announcements you'd love to hear. Link goes to some funny stuff
source: queenhill.demon.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Naples News)
 
 
 
More info on Rush guitarist Alex Lifesons' New Years' brawl. Includes excellent mugshots
source: naplesnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin Daily Herald)
 
 
 
God found naked in Austin, MN. Police learn mace and tasers have little effect
source: austindailyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(2theadvocate.com)
 
 
 
Man dies after discharging gun he left cocked in chair he had been sitting in for two hours
source: 2theadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Penny Arcade)
 
 
 
Penny Arcade's $200,000 donation to Seattle Children's Hospital becomes "nearly a thousand dollars" and from "a local catholic school" thanks to incompetent media coverage
source: penny-arcade.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha.com)
 
 
 
KSU quarterback cleared to play. Ohio State will have to rely on buying the refs as usual
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Grand Forks Herald)
 
 
 
Hunters can stop mailing their deer testicles to Texas A & M, it worked
source: grandforks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Malaysian man kills 1,175 rats in three months with a slingshot
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop a stolen gnome in captivity. Link goes to original
source: whereismygnome.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Miracle slot machines dispense double cash due to currency conversion error
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Sixty-five percent of surveyed Britons don't know what city the musical "Chicago", TV show "Dallas" are set in
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
It's not a New Year's party until the hotel gets shut down after revelers start spraying each other with fire hoses
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
PG&E's execs get over $83 million from plan to emerge from bankruptcy
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Woman receives $35,000 to settle sexual harassment suit with boss. Pays back money after she and boss are seen dating afterwards
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Pat Robertson says God told him Bush will win 2004 in landslide
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Aftenposten.no)
 
 
 
New studies reveal women are heavy net porn users, and Norwegians like to pay for it
source: aftenposten.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
BBC radio-phone poll indicates many Brits want to be able to use force against burglars. Left-wing MP reacts with rage against democracy. "The people have spoken, the bastards"
source: news.independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsMax)
 
 
 
James Carville says Howard Dean is suffering from a "political lobotomy." In related news, Richard Simmons acuses Elton John of being "way too gay"
source: newsmax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Why not throw it all away and start over as a goat farmer?
source: news.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Newest reality show to feature Southwest Airline flight attendents dealing with asshats
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Australian)
 
 
 
Australian scientists identify the part of the Milky Way most likely to contain life. Sensors indicate presence of breweries, rugby fields, 'roo meat and girlie shows
source: theaustralian.news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Long-time power plant welder can no longer work at nuke facilities because his fingerprints are too worn to read
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(contracostatimes.com)
 
 
 
Round-up of spiffy new laws going into effect this year around the country
source: contracostatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
The Governator also considering early release for 25,000 prisoners... just swell
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Rush guitarist Alex Lifeson inadvertently qualifies for a contract with the Charlotte Hornets
source: wmcstations.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Look, up in the sky. It's a bird. It's a plane. It's... a Jeep (with pictures)
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this angry, hippie-eating tree
source: members.tripod.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Man becomes extremely "tired" just after buying his coffee
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Man sells off 40-year collection of Playboy mags for $80
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
Driver watching TV ignores red light, causes fatal accident
source: mdn.mainichi.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
Man struck in the head by New Year's celebration bullet
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Michael Biehn)
 
 
 
The Governator terminates much of Public Health and Welfare
source: customwire.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chattanoogan)
 
 
 
Man steals three cars, crashes into a house, and bites a TV news reporter -- all in about an hour
source: chattanoogan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Pete Rose to admit to betting on baseball in autobiography due next week?
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(GloFish)
 
 
 
Glow-in-the-dark fish are coming to a store near you. Photoshop an advertisement for them. Link goes to a starting place
source: glofish.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(eBay)
 
 
 
New eBay loophole - 'not intended for consumption' - makes selling booze ok
source: cgi.ebay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu January 01, 2004
(Herald Tribune (SW Florida))
 
 
 
Principal warns of net-bullies
source: news.bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
NewsFlash
 
British flight canceled due to security worries
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Creed, Limp Bizkit named worst bands of 2003
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Discovery)
 
 
 
Next mars probe scheduled to be lost forever this Saturday
source: dsc.discovery.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBZ 4)
 
 
 
Hundreds take chilly dip in Boston Harbor to usher in New Year, shrinkage ensues
source: wbz4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
2004's language irritants: 'bling-bling,' 'punked,' 'metrosexual'
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Man drums for 72 hours, new world record claimed. Sadly, he was killed by irate neighbors
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
AudioEdit someone trying to talk their way out of a DUI
source: homepages.wmich.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
NewsFlash
 
Strong Earthquake Rocks Mexico City
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Earth's spin changes. Superman wanted for questioning
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ohio.com)
 
 
 
Police accuse preacher of performing marriage ceremonies without a license, stealing an above ground swimming pool
source: ohio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wilmington Star)
 
 
 
ReplayTV screws its customers with a holiday bait-and-switch
source: wilmingtonstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Dorval airport renamed Pierre Elliot Trudeau airport. Quebec separatists protest, westerners give it the finger, satellite terminal runs off to New York with Rolling Stones, everyone puzzled by the canoe landings
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ICNetwork)
 
 
 
37% of Brits support law allowing you to shoot a burglar who breaks into your home
source: iccoventry.icnetwork.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Juneau Empire)
 
 
 
Photoshop this old lady and her bottle
source: juneauempire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Education)
 
 
 
Serial horsefarker sentenced to only 30 days. When asked if satisfied with the sentence, the victim replied neigh
source: bangornews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for failing to pay $2 parking ticket. Husband arrives to pay $35 bail, parks in space reserved for patrol cars. More hilarity ensues
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
British spies warned of U.S. plans to invade Arab states, don't realize Nixon talked that way about everyone. Haven't heard the tapes apparently
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Poughkeepsie Journal)
 
 
 
Man receives patent for the symbol of Islam, now just waiting for all those royalties
source: poughkeepsiejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
DC bound British Airways flight gets fighter escort, dozen passengers detained for questioning
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Nurse stuck in lavatory, has friend pass a straw through the keyhole of the toilet door to allow her to celebrate New Years
source: news.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Atheism is the most irrational and illogical religion on the planet
source: hauns.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Break out your cliches, "SOYLENT GREEN IS PEOPLE." is airing on TCM tonight (adjust for your time zone)
source: tv.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
Red and pewter stadium seats to match Bucs team colors fades to pink and pewter. Bucs not amused
source: sptimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(theage.com.au)
 
 
 
Alien autopsy, crop circles and more; the ten best science scams
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toledo Blade)
 
 
 
If you have a question about your pension, call the phone sex hotline
source: toledoblade.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
David Blaine named biggest loser of 2003
source: heraldsun.news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Man already under house arrest goes outside and welcomes in the New Year by firing a gun into the air
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Largest snake goes on display (with picture goodness)
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Comet Net)
 
 
 
Brits still looking for lost Beagle, have even placed a lost ad in the supermarket circular
source: thecomet.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Web auctions gear up for sales of unwanted gifts
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press & Dakotan)
 
 
 
Photoshop this guy and whatever he is doing
source: yankton.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Caller)
 
 
 
Corpus Christi driver runs stop sign, answers age-old "dump truck versus 18-wheeler" question
source: caller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Macon County Times)
 
 
 
Next time you plan on dropping a log, make sure you don't tear your liver in the process
source: maconcountytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
When robbing a bank, don't write your holdup note on a personal check
source: customwire.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Not sufficiently frightened of Mad Cow, Asian markets expand fears to include Mad Tater Disease
source: komotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nzoom)
 
 
 
Revelers in New Zealand ring in the New Year by beating the living bejesus out of each other
source: onenews.nzoom.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arizona Star)
 
 
 
Ticking art sparks bomb scare
source: azstarnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Bowlingbowlingbowlingbowlingbowling..
source: us.rd.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Reason #1 to attend ballet this year: "In Carmen there is a lot of crotch grabbing. There will be no matinee."
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Due to the increased costs of responding to false burglar alarms, LAPD to enforce new "We don't give a rat's ass" policy in 2004
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Unnamed pitcher who left Yankees for another team this offseason did it because his wife found out about his mistress. Gee, that could be anyone...
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSOC)
 
 
 
"Damnit, my remote control airplane is caught in the power wires. Honey, fetch me the long metal pole."
source: wsoctv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
Video
 
Japanese yo-yo weilding overlords? Quite likely indeed
source: ktbz.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Green Bay Press-Gazette)
 
 
 
Friday is 'Packer Pride Day' in Wisconsin. Green and gold de rigueur, Cardinal red and white also acceptable
source: greenbaypressgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Right Wing News)
 
 
 
Why raising the minimum wage costs poor people jobs
source: rightwingnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(calcommuters.org)
 
 
 
California freeway drivers have their own place on the net to talk about how much they hate being stuck in traffic
source: calcommuters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Tony Blair agreed to be on "The Simpsons" only if no one called him America's "poodle."
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press & Dakotan)
 
 
 
Photoshop the world's youngest volunteer fire department
source: yankton.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Happy New Year!
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed December 31, 2003
(Channel3000)
 
 
 
Cabbies in Mad City will charge a $50 "bodily fluids cleanup fee" in case your cab ride gets out of hand
source: channel3000.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
New Year's Eve celebrations worldwide have heightened security against people wanting to blow themselves up, except in the Philippines where blowing yourself up is a tradition intended to drive away evil, bad luck, and unwanted limbs
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Sherrif's responds to Jacko's claims of abuse: We didn't touch the panzy
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Kansas City Channel)
 
 
 
Man accidentally killed when posing as pinata for kids
source: thekansascitychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Undercover.com.au)
 
 
 
Anita Mui dead at 40. You may remember her as the female character in every Jackie Chan movie ever made
source: undercover.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC17)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for felony child abuse. Her t-shirt at booking reads "I do what the voices in my head tell me to do."
source: nbc17.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Princess Anne's terrier, growing ambitious after mauling one of the Queen's corgis, tries to make royal servant her bitch
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Aurora News-Register)
 
 
 
Small town forced to remove 35 year old giant arrow sign pointing toward downtown. With pic of sign and town mayor in purple shirt
source: auroranewsregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Bawaba)
 
 
 
2003 year-end gossip review for the Middle East entertainment scene
source: albawaba.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
U.S. jobless claims fall to nearly 3-year low
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
AudioEdit a parent trying to explain to a child where babies come from
source: autos.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press & Dakotan)
 
 
 
Photoshop this going once... going twice... sold picture
source: yankton.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Fans of crooked-toothed women rejoice as Britain considers changing its prositution laws
source: politics.guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(thepittsburghchannel.com)
 
 
 
If the guy you're arguing with at the bar has a chainsaw, and he says "You wanna step outside, buddy?", don't go
source: thepittsburghchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Techweb)
 
 
 
Judge dismisses AOL's spam lawsuit
source: techweb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Atlanta welcomes 2004 by dropping giant sunburned arse...erm... peach
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Halliburton loses Iraqi oil contracts. New contracts to be awarded by bid
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NapkinNights)
 
Boobies
 
The hottest 100 Vegas pictures from 2003. Mainly not work safe
 
(Bday.co.za)
 
 
 
Police are warning S. African residents not to toss refrigerators off high-rise balconies during New Year's celebrations
source: bday.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Aftenposten.no)
 
 
 
Middle-aged German couple blame berserk attack on fear of gay security guards
source: aftenposten.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Dumbass robber drops job application with home address on it. Jailarity esues
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Port Clinton News Herald)
 
 
 
Couple to tie knot at walleye drop
source: portclintonnewsherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Monica Lewinsky asks court for $800,000; no cigar
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Modbee.com)
 
 
 
Mystery Salvation Army donor strikes again in West Virginia
source: modbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Chick-fil-A's cows on hold as angry cows temporarily not in vogue
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(al.com)
 
 
 
Alabama brings in the New Year. "Pistols are the weapons of choice. It's a cheap man's fireworks."
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SignOn SanDiego)
 
 
 
Mega Millions ticket for $155 million jackpot sold in Ohio, probably to one of the asshats shooting out car windows
source: signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
Boobies
 
Nekkid clown. not safe for work
 
(The State)
 
 
 
Man shot for his biscuits, which is considerably better than being shot in the biscuits. Samoans. Do the Humpty Hump
source: thestate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press and Journal)
 
 
 
Man jumps straight to the head of the taxi queue by brandishing chainsaw in city centre
source: thisisnorthscotland.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
...I just raaaaaaaaaaaan, I ran all night and daaaaaaaaay
source: news.bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Times)
 
 
 
More people would rather skydive with Homer Simpson than with George W Bush
source: dailytimes.com.pk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
David Wells leaves Yankees, signs with Padres. No longer has to worry about asking out of World Series game in first inning
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Pitt holds another opponent to 55 points or less. Home winning streak 33 games, tying Duke for longest current streak. Possibly due to having one of the weakest schedules in college ball, right up there with overrated UConn. Duke sucks
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Another dead body in an airplane wheel well
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
I hereby dub thee: Sir Intarweb
source: news.com.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Man has 114 dead cats in freezers in home. Your dog wants a catsicle
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Blue of Blue's Clues to say her first words in February. Will reportedly discuss how Steve was a porn star and died of a heroin overdose
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOBTV.com)
 
 
 
Albuquerque man prepares for New Year's bash by covering roof in plywood to slow down incoming bullets
source: kobtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Britney Spears to perform in lesbian show. Oh, wait
source: miami.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
How do you celebrate New Year's in space? With tea and chicken, of course. Odds of there not being vodka involved: 0
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
NewsFlash
 
New Year's Eve explosion rips through Baghdad restaurant
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Sonofawitch.)
 
 
 
What does your aura mean? Here comes the pseudoscience
source: magikcauldron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
105-pound woman crowned Fruitcake Champion after swallowing nearly five pounds of the treat in 10 minutes
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Naples News)
 
 
 
What does 'Auld Lang Syne' mean? Hint: drinking figures prominently. So does drinking
source: naplesnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Times)
 
 
 
36 dead in China fireworks factory blast. Giant ash snake seen headed for the ocean, Godzilla called in by Tokyo to fight it
source: dailytimes.com.pk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(VH1.com)
 
 
 
A Flock of Seagulls to reunite on VH1. Along with other bands no one cares about anymore
source: vh1.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Brasstown, NC gearing up for the New Year's Eve "Possum Drop" (pic)
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
In Michigan's U.P. on the border of Eastern and Central time, some will ring in midnight at one bar, snowmobile about 4 miles, and ring in midnight at another
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC5i.com)
 
 
 
90-year-old woman fined $290 for taking her trash out a day early
source: nbc5i.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Pilots opposed to armed flights, prefer wings
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Military gunships to patrol Las Vegas Strip tonight - Danny Ocean surrenders.
source: reviewjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Kicking an air marshal in the jimmy won't win you any frequent flier miles
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
$210 million jackpot ignites powerball frenzy on New Year's Eve
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Viagra abuse grows among younger men. They have to do something to keep those stupid, baggy pants from falling down to their ankles
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
Ski resort cannot open because of too much snow
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
If you're going to have a heart attack on an airplane, make sure there are 15 heart specialists on board
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
The next appearance of the Quadrantid meteor shower is this Sunday
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News and Sentinel)
 
 
 
Cop leaves bunch of guns in a cardboard box in the back seat of his car. Guess what got stolen?
source: newsandsentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Arnold, promising no raised taxes before election, raises park taxes after election. Arnold flexes muscles, chants, "I am the Governator."
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Police chief asks that residents not fire guns in air during New Year's. ''People welcome in the New Year by idiotically shooting guns into the air, not realizing that those bullets come down at 120 miles per hour.''
source: miami.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Britain will drink 130 million pints of beer tonight
source: sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Coward Congressman urges people to avoid Times Square. Mayor Bloomberg says grow a pair
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Photoshop federal air marshals demonstrating a hi-jacking situation
source: a1112.g.akamai.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seguin Gazette-Enterprise)
 
 
 
Getting drunk hanging out at Fark in front of your computer on New Years Eve will help avoid drunk driving
source: news.seguingazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NCBuy)
 
 
 
Wacky nuclear physicist says Martians are sabotaging the satellites. Also claims to own a mansion and a yacht
source: ncbuy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Guy)
 
 
 
What's your New Year's resolution? (Link goes to GIS for new year's resolution)
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Things to remember to do before getting rid of your old PC
source: bcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Port Clinton)
 
 
 
Ohio town drops 600-pound fish at midnight -- with webcam
source: portclinton.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida 80-year-olds now required to receive eye tests before renewing their driver's licenses. Still won't be able to tell the difference between a Red Lobster and a farmer's market
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Prof. Colin Pillinger, the leading scientist for the Beagle 2 Mars landing module
source: a1112.g.akamai.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(7-eleven.com)
 
 
 
Get free coffee at 7-Eleven on New Year's Eve
source: 7-eleven.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bi Chicks. w00t)
 
 
 
As per the chicks-kissing-chicks discussion earlier, here are zillions of pics of, you guessed it, chicks kissing chicks. Prolly not SFW
source: alink.co.za
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Zilwaukee, Michigan men over the age of 21 must grow a beard until June, or pay for a $10 permit to not have a beard
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman tells armed robbers she had just gotten out of the hospital and suffers from epilepsy. Robber tells partner, "Hey, my cousin has that, let's go rob someone else"
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
After a father/son drinking session, it is not advisable to try to rob a restaurant on foot with a drill and saunter away when unsuccessful
source: kctv5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
"Pennsylvania: We're old. We're cranky. Deal with it." ruled out as state slogan
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Southeast Missourian)
 
 
 
Six-hundred-pound antique chandelier crashes to Senate floor at Missouri Capitol Building
source: semissourian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Iran wants to build nuclear power plant on the same fault line that destroyed Bam
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Cap this holiday season by AudioEditing "Post-Holiday Depression"
source: nmha.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 30, 2003
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Britney and Christina feuding. Don't worry, kids, it's all a publicity stunt culminating in a pay-per-view mud-wrestling extravaganza
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Calif. student argues against illegal immigration. Hispanic students threaten him, teachers refuse to protect him
source: washtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Honolulu Advertiser)
 
 
 
Could a CHEAP trend catch on with second-generation Farkers?
source: the.honoluluadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Despite changing trends in beer-drinking, Sam Adams focuses on producing good brew. Chocolate Bock coming your way soon
source: bostonmagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(newsnet5.com)
 
 
 
Thief who stole baby Jesus from nativity scene paints it black, returns it. Owner was hoping for more of a mauve color
source: newsnet5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Freerepublic.com)
 
NewsFlash
 
Air France Flight 68 being intercepted by NORAD
source: freerepublic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
And I raaaaaaaaaaaan, I ran so far awaaaaaaaaaay
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
World's biggest sperm bank uses Viking aliases such as Birk, Gorm, Olaf and Thor
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Juneau Empire)
 
 
 
Photoshop this winter chore
source: juneauempire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Saturn as close as it has been to Earth in 30 years. Sailor Moon jealous
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Harley-riding, tattooed, toothless tweeker Raiders fans rejoice as Oakland Raiders fire head coach Bill Callahan
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
FedEx and Kinko's unite to form Finko's
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Downer cattle banned from food and New Years Eve parties. "They are just too depressing" says Jessica Simpson
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toms Hardware Guide)
 
 
 
5 GHz Project: CPU Cooling With Liquid Nitrogen
source: www20.tomshardware.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Cats may be to blame for house explosion
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Gibson's new ethernet guitar has left the industry scratching its head
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kinshay)
 
 
 
William Shatner to record an album with Henry Rollins. And the sun became black as sackcloth, and the moon became as blood
source: kinshay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC)
 
 
 
Train engineer on cellphone does 60+ mph in a 10-mph zone. Derailarity ensues
source: nbc5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toledo Blade)
 
 
 
Man masters Etch A Sketch, now refers to himself as Mr. Etch A Sketch and takes his skills on the road
source: toledoblade.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KLAS-TV)
 
 
 
Parts of Las Vegas get up to three inches of snow. Local news stations tripping over each other to cover this "breaking story"
source: klas-tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Honeymooners fan: Jackie Gleason got a bus depot when he died, so why shouldn't Art Carney get a sanitation facility?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Orange alert leads New Jersey mall to ban early-morning "mall walkers"
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BadJocks.com)
 
 
 
BadJocks names top 10 stories of the year, including cheerleader who shot rival in butt with paintball gun
source: badjocks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
2003 P.U.-litzers Prize announced
source: dissidentvoice.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Iran wonders why earthquake killed tens of thousands when last week's similar California earthquake only killed two
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Michael Jackson's chief spokesman quits over "strategic differences." Rejected strategies include filling giant wooden horse with little boys and bringing it into Neverland Ranch
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you're a bad-ass gangsta rapper, apply here
source: feisar.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Nation of Islam to Jacko: "Get your hand out of (our) pocket"
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Grand Theft Auto is "10,000 times worse" than child molestation
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Woman sues Starbucks for $10 million because they failed to alert her that coffee is hot
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wbns)
 
 
 
If you're paid bi-weekly, you're getting any extra paycheck next year
source: 10tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(newsnet5.com)
 
 
 
Teens unaware how easy it is to buy beer these days, now overdosing on Robitussin cough syrup to get buzz
source: newsnet5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Wizards of the Coast to close stores -- Magic: The Gathering leagues have 60 days to find new social hub
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
Boobies
 
Ginger, the spice of life (not safe for work)
source: kindgirls.com
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Satellite image of Bam, Iran one day after earthquake
source: fas.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Man pulls off £1 million heist and actually avoids shooting himself or leaving behind his wallet
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Nude photos of Barbie dolls being attacked by kitchen appliances now A-OK in Utah
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Man rescued after being trapped for two days under a mountain of reading material in his apartment. Principal Skinner unavailable for comment
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Minutes later, Spurrier announces he really is gone. There will be no more updates on this, it's not worth the attention
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Reclusive Russian solves century-old mathematical puzzle, doesn't care about million-dollar prize
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Ashcroft to step down from CIA probe
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Advocate)
 
 
 
Louisiana leads nation in gonorrhea
source: 2theadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 4 Columbus Ohio)
 
 
 
DUI offenders in Ohio may have to sport special "I drove drunk and got caught -- I am an assclown" license plates
source: nbc4columbus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Minutes later, Spurrier says he has not resigned, only "considering options"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boulder Daily Camera)
 
 
 
Earth's orbit isn't slowing any more and scientists don't know why
source: dailycamera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Teen girls now enjoying the new "bisexual chic" fad, kissing each other at parties
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NY Daily News)
 
 
 
Man tries to jump off bridge from upper deck. Lands on lower deck. Dies anyway
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Spurrier resigns as Redskins coach
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Abraham Lincoln bites ex-girlfriend, runs off with her cell phone. No, really
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Israeli soldiers more scared of giant rats than terrorists
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Santa saves woman's life during boat parade
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCNC.com)
 
 
 
Man proposes to girlfriend while impaled on his motorcycle handlebars
source: wcnc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Fed helicopters to patrol NYC on New Year's Eve
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Post Standard)
 
 
 
NY state bar proves smoking ban hurts business, gets waiver
source: syracuse.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Review)
 
 
 
Britney will pose naked; Bush wins in landslide; Kucinich promises to "make the economy his bitch" -- and other amusing and insightful predictions for 2004 by National Review
source: nationalreview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Parents outraged when child's new Christmas toy comes with live bullets
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
The most admired people in the U.S. are Hillary Clinton and George W. Bush. Probably not admired by the same people
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Box score for Philadelphia-Binghamton American Hockey League game
source: pointstreak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Hockey game forced to end early after several fights result in shortage of players to complete the match
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
New Years guide to all that is marathon TV. Includes 12 hours of Matlock
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Britney Spears to perform with similar acts: Metallica, Guns N' Roses and Slipknot
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ozy)
 
 
 
More infamous moments in 2003 sports
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Don't open email attachments from the Bank of England that will "protect you from credit card fraud"
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NCBuy)
 
 
 
Schwarzenegger becomes first California governor to have beer brewed in his honor -- "Governator Ale"
source: ncbuy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Drudge)
 
 
 
Dear USA: Thanks for the relief aid and rescue workers, but you still suck. Sincerly, Iran
source: news.myway.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Fox reaches bottom of barrel, breaks out the pickaxes for "My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiancé"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Christina Aguilera named "top role model" by London teen-mag readers
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Juneau Empire)
 
 
 
Photoshop this winter action scene
source: juneauempire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(1010wins.com)
 
 
 
New product helps potty train the cat
source: customwire.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
FDA to ban Ephedra products
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Guy who played neighbor behind the fence on "Home Improvement" dies of lung cancer
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Boy hasn't spoken since the garage door at his house tried to eat him
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Calif. cuts funding for the arts by 90 percent, Colo. cuts 80 percent, Fla. cuts 77 percent. See how your state is
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
The Smoking Gun announces winners from its 25 mugshot deck giveaway. Also announces it's giving Farkers another 25
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
From the department of "helluva a lot of good it does now"...
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CorporateMofo)
 
 
 
By the way, we're all being screwed on our taxes
source: corporatemofo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"Why do they call tunafish 'Chicken of the Sea?'" Jessica Simpson to the rescue
source: ask.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
Babes celebrate Japan's resurgent disco boom with skimpy suits, gawking guys
source: mdn.mainichi.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Gauss rifles, rail guns, plastic hydrogen bombs and film-can cannons: Tom Ridge's nightmare, or your kid's next science fair project?
source: sci-toys.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bob from Accounting)
 
 
 
BFA's list of the top 25 people from 2003 in need of a little "ethnic cleansing." By "ethnic cleansing," we really mean "poked to death in the eye with a small, sharp stick. Repeatedly"
source: bobfromaccounting.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Honolulu StarBulletin)
 
 
 
The coming "Big One" earthquake on the West Coast could also devastate Hawaii
source: starbulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Paralympics)
 
 
 
Top 10 media fark-ups of 2003
source: sunspot.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Dave Barry takes a look at 2003
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Rise up and end the cursed tyranny of the moon
source: stu.wccnet.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KUSA)
 
 
 
Completing the car vandalism trifecta: Longmont, Colorado weighs in with 80 cars damaged
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
M&Ms to lose their colors (except for six bags) in a Willy Wonka style promotion. Five little asshats and one decent kid expected to win
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Mmmmmmelissa (see below) ticketed for appearing naked on Internet
source: usatoday.printthis.clickability.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Honolulu Advertiser)
 
 
 
What are the 10 best music albums of 2003 (if there are actually that many)?
source: the.honoluluadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
U.S. tells foreign airlines to put guards on planes travelling to the U.S.
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
Boobies
 
Nice genes. Not safe for work
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Kobe Bryant's court case is the AP sports story of the year
source: customwire.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Montgomery Advertiser)
 
 
 
Hundreds of millions of dollars not properly accounted for in Alabama schools. Accountants confused their gozintas with their cyphering. Forgot to carry the naught
source: montgomeryadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
Texan man pleads guilty to posession of WMDs. Saddam feels sad and impotent
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farker OneHandFapping)
 
 
 
Develop the symbol for the Fark Political Party
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Two-year-old song from cult movie "Donnie Darko" played once on British TV in November, hits number one in the UK pop charts
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Armed meat-pie robbery, only in Australia
source: reuters.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(VanHagar Fan)
 
 
 
Van Hagar back together...
source: birminghamspoint.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Billboard.com)
 
 
 
Meat Puppets' Cris Kirkwood shot by security guard at Phoenix post office
source: billboard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Christopher Walken to appear on Conan New Year's Day
source: interbridge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
Boobies
 
Mmmmmmelissa (not safe for work)
source: melissalincoln.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DurangoHerald)
 
 
 
Presenting the not-quite New Year's Eve best of Durango, CO police blotter 2003
source: durangoherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon December 29, 2003
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Tree surgeon discovers frowny face in cut sycamore branch (w/scary pic of tree surgeon)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(woio.com)
 
 
 
Giant magnesium fire in Cleveland. Pouring water on it makes it explode. The metal, not the city
source: woio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(some indy DJ)
 
 
 
Use this tool to find out which radio stations in your area are owned by Clear Channel
source: clearchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
Almost two-thirds of the U.S. is online. The rest are either in diapers or AARP (perhaps also in diapers)
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toledo Blade)
 
 
 
Tavern's wooden bust of John Travolta is returned with little damage
source: toledoblade.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The eight biggest tech flops ever. $1B Iridium satellite constellation left out "cause no one ever used it"
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Honolulu Advertiser)
 
 
 
Storm hits Hawaii. Snow and hailarity ensue
source: the.honoluluadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Sucks: Being stabbed in the abdomen on a cold winter night. Blows: Becoming frozen to the pavement by your own blood
source: news.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Women are better than men. They are more scholarly, more hip, more artistic, more in harmony with nature and safer to be around. Still can't drive a standard or squish spiders
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sentinel Online)
 
 
 
Today's bounty of overturned food on the highway brought to you by Carlisle, PA: Fruit salad marinated in a delectable shower bodywash
source: cumberlink.com   |   share: Share on Facebook