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Sat July 21, 2018
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Toddler saves dad having a stroke by face-timing mom
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Torn from the front page of the Bangor Daily News: You're watching too many cartoons
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)
 
 
 
Thieves behind $8,000,000 Library theft revealed to be archivist responsible for the collection and the owner of the neighborhood rare book store. They'd have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for those meddling kids
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Imagine a world where everyone is vegan, plastic bags are banned, and the only cruelty left is bicycle-to-bicycle drive-by shootings
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Marijuana deaths have risen over 65% in the last 20 years. No wonder it's illegal. Oh wait, that's alcohol deaths. Nevermind, continue drinking
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
What the world will look like after all the ice melts because of global warming. Bonus: No more Florida (possible nsfw content on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 20, 2018
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Has there ever been a more sublime phrase than "increased flow of beer, alcohol"?
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Oh, the stranded manatee
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Celebrity surgeon "Dr. Bumbum," on the lam after a patient's death, has been captured. Writers for "Law & Order" hear the call
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Woman gives birth to 6th child in her garden in front of 1.4 million people. That's one big garden (possible nsfw content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WISTV)
 
 
 
Headline: Town's sudden stance on mobile homes causes division, uncertainty. Article: Town's zoning ordnance, that had been in place since 1994 finally being enforced
source: wistv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Don't you just hate it when you go to the bathroom and find a rabid bat clinging to your arm?
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
I have no idea what you're talking about, so here's a roller skating dog wearing a dashing red cape
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
The UK is using child spies in police operations. To be fair, it's probably cheaper to just stuff a toddler in a lamp than it is to install some expensive surveillance bug in it
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Does this smell like nerve agent to you?
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this friendly neighborhood crossroads
source: stg-ec-ore-u.uplynk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you bet "spontaneously combusting tortilla chips" would be the next sign this timeline is being written by a deranged six-year-old, step up to claim your prize
source: cbsaustin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Australian plane struck by lightning mid-air, proving Australia will try to kill you at a distance too
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Ask not for whom the Hemingway Look-Alike Contest is held, for the Hemingway Look-Alike Contest is held for thee
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Please note: when filing a complaint about police misconduct with the department, the official filing cabinet for that complaint might look suspiciously circular
source: bothell-reporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
After the Navy changes course on ponytails for women, men ask for permission to grow beards. Experts think the Navy may meet them halfway and permit man-buns and patchy goatees
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Dole out the cooked pineapples
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Marijuana should be legal in all 50 states, according to my new favorite congressman, Tim Ryan
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Man with history of threatening people at convenience store argues with woman parked in handicapped space, shoots her boyfriend after being pushed to the ground. Cops say he might not be charged because of Florida's "stand your ground" law
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Colleges are starting to ask for a share of future salary in lieu of loans, First borns still safe
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Farmer)
 
 
 
Photoshop this secret urban farm
source: theurbanfarmer.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
ATF halts investigation into multi-million dollar hotel arson case because... the local police detective stopped returning their calls
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Honolulu Star Advertiser)
 
 
 
Who the hell eats raw turkey?
source: staradvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
If you have stolen the Thomas The Tank Engine land train in Lowestoft, Suffolk, every driver in the town would like to buy you a large drink
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
A 9-year-old was forced to remain in the classroom and watch her classmates have fun at a good attendance celebration because she had had surgery that caused her to miss class for two weeks
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
King Kong has been arrested in Iowa after threatening to kidnap and eat children. (with mugshot goodness)
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
'Star Wars' action figures expected to sell for $360K. No word on if the bidders will be named Cooper, Hofstadter, Wolowitz and Koothrappali
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Baby born at Chik-fil-A to get free food for life. Jeez, I was born in a hospital, and I didn't get squat
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Man posed as buyer to steal $5,000 gold nugget. Insurers use the vampire rule, won't cover cost because he was invited inside which renders homeowners powerless
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
An important part of any sting is having the police actually show up
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Three skeletons found in ancient Egyptian sarcophagus. What were they expecting to find, a toaster oven?
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Horses
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Curbed)
 
 
 
Let's enjoy the dead rats, barnacle-encrusted condoms and a cockroach using a napkin as a raft as we take a ride down the Gowanus Canal in NYC in a canoe
source: ny.curbed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CW33 Dallas)
 
 
 
First class at University of Houston's new medical school will have their tuition paid for after anonymous $3 million donation
source: cw33.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MIT Technology Review)
 
 
 
You can soon have the Fukushima California wine vintage
source: technologyreview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Caption this cat in charge
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
SPAM products recalled. Hawaiians raise alert level from 'active volcano' to 'panic'
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The European Space Agency wants a name for its Mars rover. Difficulty: No Spacey McSpaceFace. How about Kevin?
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKTV Utica)
 
 
 
Police respond to 911 call, find a gator inside an abandoned building. Fark: In western New York
source: wktv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Artist fills potholes in Manhattan, Brooklyn with 'Vermin of New York'-themed mosaics
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
NYC steam pipe explosion scattered asbestos over about 50 buildings. "I hate to say it, if someone was wearing expensive clothing at the time ... If it has fibers in it, you're not going to see that clothing again," the mayor said
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
It's been a difficult few days in politics: let's have fun by Photoshopping Ernie and Bert
source: static.independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
What is the point of kale? How did it go from being a plate garnish to being eaten? Are we that hard up for greens? Can we feed it to real food and still get nutrition? It's the Fark Weird News Quiz July 1-7 Kale Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Holy housing disputes! HOA makes man take down his batcave
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Proof, if proof were needed, that most jokes have an element of truth in them as 220 people from Northern Ireland are treated in hospital for sunburn
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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