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Sat December 05, 2020
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
First thing they should have stolen was a new car battery
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
The importance of mask mandates, explained in chart form
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Mary Sue)
 
 
 
An inexperienced know-it-all fan tries to school Nora Roberts on how book publishing works. Romancelandia: WE RIDE AT DAWN
source: themarysue.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Canada changes its vaccine plan based on ridiculous conspiracies and...what's that? Oh. Based on Dr. Tam redoing the math and consulting scientists. Ok. But now what are we going to be enraged by?
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
The long-feared collapse of American hospitals under the weight of COVID-19 is no longer imminent, it's officially here
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
STAY THE F*CK AT HOME, you idiot
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Calgary Sun)
 
 
 
Alberta Premier Kenney to anti-mask protestors, "Quit being stupid and stay home". Protestors respond, "You have no idea how stupid we can be"
source: calgarysun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri December 04, 2020
(Twitter)
 
 
 
We've now come to the part in the worst timeline ever, where if your mom gets COVID you have to go on Facebook and beg a bunch of hospitals to take her and hope someone replies
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTNV Las Vegas)
 
 
 
Pahrump pum pum pum
source: ktnv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Multiple US Marshals injured in shootout. Should have stuck to gas stations, residences, warehouses, farmhouses, henhouses, outhouses and doghouses, avoided the Bronx
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
1-46
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
When Earth gives you islands, make a refugee camp
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
Starting today, Farkers can adopt a Dear Santa letter from the USPS Operation Santa, and give some kids a better Christmas (linkie in article)
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Finally. A tweet worthy of all farkers
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
NOT NEWS: "Drug kingpin" goes on the lam for 35 years, assuming the identity of a dead infant born in 1955. NEWS: Passport renewal catches and fingerprints confirm his identity. FARK: He doesn't face any drug charges, just passport fraud
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
In Russia vaccine trials choose state employees
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Skynet can now launch satellites with drones. T-1000 wonders why he's even around anymore
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gazette and Herald)
 
 
 
Subby was quite disappointed to find out the nature of the knockers
source: gazetteandherald.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJLA Washington DC)
 
 
 
Kindergartner mixes up his learnin' packpack with his shootin' backpack
source: wjla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this vine seating
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
NewsFlash
 
It's official: Biden wins
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
China has super-soldier serum. But you'll want another one 20 minutes later (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hard Boiled News)
 
 
 
It defied the laws of jailhouse physics and detectives are still stumped after 20 years
source: hardboilednews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 Atlanta)
 
 
 
Dear Sir or Madam: You child was possibly exposed to Covid. Please get into Obama's time machine and start quarantining 11 days ago
source: fox5atlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 6 Providence)
 
 
 
It's time to make the asymptomatic donuts
source: abc6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitch.tv)
 
 
 
7 p.m. Eastern - it's Fark Friday Movie Night, 1930s sci-fi serials edition. Bring a bucket to wear on your head like the bad guys do
source: twitch.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RTE Ireland)
 
 
 
Sheep found roaming around hotel corridors in Wales which shouldn't come as a surprise to the locals but some are pretending this is the first time it's ever happened
source: rte.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
Sixteen beautiful portraits of Native Americans posing in authentic traditional outfits
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guinness World Records)
 
 
 
Man breaks land speed wheelchair record
source: guinnessworldrecords.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mational Day Calendar)
 
 
 
Today is National Dice Day, so break out those icosahedrons and save versus nerdism
source: nationaldaycalendar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Florida Sheriff holds press conference where he calls recently arrested scammers "brilliant" and says he can't divulge details of the scam so as not to encourage other scammers. Article then proceeds to give details of the scam
source: fox13news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 42 Birmingham)
 
 
 
Alabama man rescued after falling inside an empty water tower. Yakko, Wakko and Dot wanted for questioning
source: cbs42.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The town that loves its 'wonky' Christmas decorations
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
The data proves Butterballs could not resist Thanksgiving
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Space Ghost)
 
 
 
Photoshop these space tourists
source: cdn.mos.cms.futurecdn.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(eBay)
 
 
 
Lovely, yes, but why would you place it THERE to take a picture???
source: ebay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCTV5 Kansas City)
 
 
 
"He died in a world where many of his fellow Americans refuse to wear a piece of cloth on their face to protect one another"
source: kctv5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Frozen Guy)
 
 
 
There isn't a way to really describe this, other than it's called "Frozen Dead Guy Days." The whole story is wild from beginning to end. Difficulty: No Walt Disney. Cool tag freezes out Weird tag
source: frozendeadguydays.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Merriam-Webster)
 
 
 
The Merriam-Webster word of the day for December 4 is "Distend" as in: "The length of a piece of wood is the distance between distend and dat end"
source: merriam-webster.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Sometimes a monolith is a monolith. But sometimes it's just a cigar (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Move over ceiling cat. Introducing ceiling wife
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
I paint a picture of myself on a public building I'm a "vandal" and "Defacing public property" and these guys painted these epic fight scenes with pre-historic animals and everyone is so impressed
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Send wire. Main office. Tell them I said .... OW
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Caption this cute couple
source: thegaltimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Han Solo's chance cubes spotted falling out of the Falcon by F/A-18 Hornet pilot, who shot first (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Ladies, try this one weird trick to increase your libido [NSFW]
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Pop culture awards, fine art, and history are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, November 22-28: Cinnamon Roll Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Stittsville family goes full Griswold for Christmas. Bonus: wood paneled station wagon with a tree tied to the roof included
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Nanu Nanu Fark Artists, it's ye Fartist Friday Contest. Our theme: Astronomy Limericks. In honor of the Arecibo radio telescope, write a far-out limerick about astronomy. And if you like, illustrate it with Pshop, MSPaint, a Moon made of cheese, etc (Contest open)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Ski resorts are not being shut down due to coronavirus, either because everyone is outside wearing masks anyway, or their $55 billion annual revenue
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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