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Tue December 18, 2018
(wtnh.com)
 
 
 
Since this is Fark, you can probably guess why a restaurant named 'Flames' is in the news
source: wtnh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
The TV show's hosts were unable to explain why the cutting-edge "Robot" was taking swigs of vodak throughout the presentation
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Oh nothing, just a life sized Thomas the Tank Engine
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
Child abuse increases after kids bring their report cards home. That'll teach 'em not to fail their classes
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deseret News)
 
 
 
Porch Pirates are getting aggressive. No longer waiting for items to be left on porches
source: deseretnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
"Struggling with the addiction to masturbation? Reach out to me and we will beat it together, said one post in a quote attributed to Jesus." Facepalm tag is without a tissue so it gives the Awkward tag a freebie
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Old news, sure, but still worth two Our Fathers and a WTF
source: catholicnewsagency.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Image of Jesus appears in Canada. Now where in Canada would that place be? Go on guess. You are correct
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WUSA9)
 
 
 
Eleven police officers suspended after 'unintentional' shooting at party. Eleven?
source: wusa9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
He's lucky...in a way
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Somebody pet your dog without asking. Do you cut them, and if so, how many times? Show all work
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon December 17, 2018
(Green Bay Press Gazette)
 
 
 
Stores in Green Bay display lifesize cardboard cutout of police chief that warns against shoplifting. Challenge accepted
source: greenbaypressgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YLE (Finland))
 
 
 
Knock knock. Do you have time to talk about our Lord and Saviour, personal data theft?
source: yle.fi   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Want to know what's going to happen in 2019? Here's a time traveler from 2030 to provide some vague non-specific answers
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Engadget)
 
 
 
For Your Mockery: The worst new tech gadgets of 2018
source: engadget.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLKY Louisville)
 
 
 
A radio station in CA: you know, "Baby It's Cold Outside" has kinda a date-rapey vibe to it, so we're just gonna play the OTHER sixteen gazillion Christmas songs instead. Kentucky radio station: hold our teeth and watch this
source: wlky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Irish Examiner)
 
 
 
"€35,000 for baby after traumatic car crash." That's too much for a baby, I can get them a baby for half that. Who's their baby guy?
source: irishexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveLeak)
 
 
 
"Mommy, what's Rover chewing on?" (NSFW)
source: liveleak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
Merriam-Webster's word of the year is 'justice' after all those lookups by Individual-1
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
There is no dinosaur, only Zuul
source: nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this crowd
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charlotte Observer)
 
 
 
Facebook continues to disable 'fraudulent' accounts including Heywood Jablowme, Jim Nasium, Erasmus B Draggin, and the National Weather Service
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
How deranged is the DJ? Wait until you see what the most played song in his iTunes Library is. Paul's Memory Bank goes through the top 35 of the DJ's songs starting at 8PM ET. Hint: He was this deranged BEFORE Trump
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Department 56)
 
 
 
No Dickens Christmas village is complete without your GREEK FRAT HOUSE, BABY
source: personalize.department56.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Florida man arrested following dodgeball altercation
source: fox13news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
British teen girls boarded train, used some unintelligible language to threaten fellow passengers. Nobody could tell they were being threatened until they consulted their chav-to-English translator app
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Portland Press Herald)
 
 
 
The feeling you get when you realize that high speed chase is going to end at your vehicle (not safe for work audio)
source: pressherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Man tries paying at McDonald's drive-thru with marijuana; cops not lovin' it
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
How the Octomom proved us all wrong and is living closer to a normal life than the rest of us
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Ahhhhhhh, THERE it is: Lots of teens think vaping is nicotine-free
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this vending machine
source: cdn.acidcow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Today's outrage: K-9 retires after nine years of service, then he's dropped off at the local animal shelter by his handler
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
"So if the Shuttle was riding *atop* a 747, how could you see him?" "Because I was inverted. No, really, I've got a great Polaroid of it"
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
Boobies
 
Playboy model who posed nude near the Vatican really nailed it (nsfw)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
Boobies
 
Judge sentences poacher to watch Bambi once a month, even though it's not clear how going to a strip club will encourage him to stop poaching
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Either the cops sent the wrong picture with the press release, messed up the photo's caption, or the Snohomish County Sheriff's Office has some splainin to do
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Insurance Journal)
 
 
 
Arsonists, "sober homes" that push residents into drugs, medical fraudsters. Bet you didn't know there was an Insurance Fraud Hall of Shame
source: insurancejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pulse (Ghana))
 
 
 
This is why I never let anyone sleep over (some NSFW images)
source: pulse.com.gh   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
When going to buy your Christmas turkey this year you may have to fight your way through a chain of Vegans
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Followup to the "son is going to burn in hell" suicide homily. It turns out that wasn't at all what the priest said. In fact, it was exactly the opposite of what the priest said (link goes to .PDF)
source: cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Cambodia makes 3.2 ton ivory bust, the largest in the country's history. But is making a huge sculpture really the best way to end the illegal ivory trade?
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFAA Fort Worth)
 
 
 
**DING** You are NOT free to move about the country with your emotional support fish
source: wfaa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
One of the more shocking discoveries in the news today is that homemade parachutes are not a good idea
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Barman discovers ATM loophole and withdraws $1.2 million during four-month spending spree, splurging it all on private jets, high-class escorts and dream holidays
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Among many particular roadside sightings one may see in Florida, I present Super Kock
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
'Sealed Bucket 'o Cats' is probably not going to catch on as a great Christmas gift
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Historic home where woman jailed during Salem witch trials lived after she was spared the noose up for sale. In other news, who knew homes had two-car garages in 1692?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Battle-hardened Iranian general dies in gun accident. In other news, experienced generals occasionally shoot themselves in the head while cleaning guns
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Scientists discover that there's no such thing as a straight person
source: broadly.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PetaPixel)
 
 
 
Somewhere there is probably a drone operator hoping that every traceable serial number on his device was destroyed by the 737 it struck
source: petapixel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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