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Sun November 17, 2019
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Should have made coffee
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
After an unscheduled physical exam for President Trump, the White House reports that his health is the best health in the history of presidents
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Today's made-for-Fark headline: "Flat earth conspiracy spreads globally"
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this hoser
source: media4.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Stories from the playground. Share stories about things that happened while you were at a playground
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Active Times)
 
 
 
That's it, we're going to Waffle House instead
source: theactivetimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
 
 
Land near airports is like soooo cheap. Counterpoint, this
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Hong Kong police officer has his adventuring career cut short
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Bill Gates has given away so much of his money that he has again become the richest person in the world
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Great, now Buffalo will not only be known for slamming ourselves through tables, but also for having 11-year-olds who sound like they can hang dry wall
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Why aren't we procreating like we should?
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
From getting dressed in the dark to the corset, petticoats, and hand-sewn clothes, Betsy Ross impersonator labors to keep it real. Except for the taking the train to work part
source: inquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 32 Chicago)
 
 
 
Five-year-old brings heroin to school and tells teacher that when he tastes it he becomes Spider-Man. At least he didn't become Florida-Man
source: fox32chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat November 16, 2019
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Fark-ready headline: UK man, 32, nearly died after parasite crawled up penis, laid eggs as he swam in lake on Africa trip
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The annual Culling of the Frat-Bro has commenced
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTNV Las Vegas)
 
 
 
'Bad meth' leads to deadly North Las Vegas stabbing. 'Good meth' would likely lead to deadly North Las Vegas stabbing as well
source: ktnv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Prince Andrew: I couldn't have had underage sex with Epstein's girls because I was having "cheese pizza" with children. So that's all cleared up then
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this doomed airplane
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Metro Times)
 
 
 
Do you live in Detroit? Want to buy marijuana now that it's legal in Michigan? Too bad, you'll have to keep driving over to Canada like you've been doing for the past year
source: metrotimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Border Patrol agent shoots Russian citizen trying to cross the border. Trump expected to issue a formal apology by noon
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Tweet-shaming a couple for a KFC proposal is the best thing this journalist could have done for them. Dumbass tag lets this one slide
source: god.dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Kookaburra
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Willamette Week)
 
Boobies
 
Actual headline: "Portland Mayor Clarifies: I Will Take Money From Strippers"
source: wweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Natural beef-based cat food that is antibiotic and hormone free is being recalled for not being salmonella free
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
What were you doing when you were 14? Hopefully not what this kid was doing
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this rooster
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Protests erupt around Iran as gas prices approach 50 cents per gallon
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Dodo)
 
 
 
For the past 16 years, two old friends have done just about everything together. Now they get to join Caturday
source: thedodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTUU Alaska)
 
 
 
Note to permitted marijuana handlers: Do not try to import heroin "internally" if you hold a permit. We can only guess where the heroin was internally concealed, but can probably guess correctly without phoning a friend or using the 50/50
source: ktuu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSTU FOX 13)
 
 
 
Diogenes was right, follow the dog's nose and it will lead you to the person fleeing an accident scene and trying to hide up a tree
source: fox13now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KBZK Bozeman)
 
 
 
The driver of a Dodge Nitro strikes a fire hydrant, then steals the hydrant but leaves the bumper behind. Police looking to press charges against the driver, presumably for driving a Dodge Nitro
source: kbzk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Captain Dick, inventor of the "Sourtoe Cocktail" has passed... and yes he has requested all his toes be removed so others may also "Kiss the Toe"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Military.com)
 
 
 
If you can squat 315 pounds ten times, the Marines might have a job for you
source: military.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
A mountainous stretch of I-70 in Colorado was closed due to: (A) heavy snow (B) a jackknifed semi (C) sunshine
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 33/40 Birmingham)
 
 
 
Airplane mating season is seldom pretty, as the photos in this article show
source: abc3340.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Recreational pot to go on sale months earlier than expected in Michigan. That really pisses the sellers off. *pause* Wait, what?
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Bad landlord checklist: Not fixing the heating. Raising your rent. Keeping your security deposit. Erecting a giant iPhone that blocks daylight getting into your apartment
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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