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Tue April 27, 2021
(Daily Star)
 
 Weeners
 
 Happy birthday, boy, here's your giant custom-made 7ft steel penis (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
0
 
(EuroNews)
 
  
 
 Racist white woman takes over a military base in Myanmar, according to this headline
source: euronews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
13
 
(Boing Boing)
 
  
 
 From the "every country suffers from its own idiots" files: Another person caught throwing coins into plane engine for "good luck" in China
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
24
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
  
 
 If you want an unhealthy bush, head for Australia
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
20
 
(Japan Today)
 
  
 
 Saitama cement factory blows up real good, damages property. "My daughter was on her way home from a cram school and was surprised to see something that looked like snowflakes falling"
source: japantoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
23
 
(NPR)
 
  
 
 Remind me again -- what's that thing about headlines phrased as a question?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
37
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
  
 
 Irish Taoiseach Micheal Martin dodges call of nature from gibbon on visit to Dublin Zoo after it reopens. Apparently the primate had been holding it in for the 244 days since it closed
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
24
 
(Some Guy)
 
  
 
 Photoshop this reflective meeting
source: churchanswers.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
12
 
(Guardian)
 
  
 
 Anything is a WWII hand grenade if you've brave enough
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
22
 
(CNN)
 
  
 
 A bottle of whiskey dating back to the Revolutionary War is about to hit the auction block for as much as $40,000. At that price the Mountain Dew had better be complimentary
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
56
 
(Bored Panda)
 
  
 
 One, two three, four, I declare a Sign War
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
72
 
(Upper Michigan's Source)
 
  
 
 Not News: Yoopers are upset that someone failed to note the existence of Upper Michigan on a map. Fark: The U.S. Census Bureau
source: uppermichiganssource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
69
 
(The Stranger)
 
  
 
 These guys get a fancy write up and are called disrupters. Meanwhile Subby stashes a few bodies in shallow graves in the woods behind his house and suddenly the police get involved
source: thestranger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
28
 
(MSN)
 
  
 
 Ready for the restrictions to ease and head out on a road trip this summer? Good luck finding gas due to a tanker driver shortage
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
40
 
(WKTV Utica)
 
  
 
 Stealing moisturizer and women's underwear from Walmart is no way to go through life, Mr. Police Officer
source: wktv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
34
 
(MLive.com)
 
  
 
 Mark it zero
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
69
 
(CNN)
 
  
 
 Travel writer extols the value of traveling with a good towel. Maybe someday they will figure out how to be a hoopy frood. Or perhaps that their idea is not even remotely new
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
43
 
(Yahoo)
 
  
 
 "Disaster Girl," now a 21-year-old college senior, just made a nice mint of her meme
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
151
 
(The Hill)
 
  
 
 CDC says it's OK for vaccinated people to disrobe their faces outside
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
256
 
(AP News)
 
  
 
 ♫♪♫ Sexbomb, sexbomb, yeah, you're a sexbomb, uh, huh ♫♪
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
25
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
  
 
 Normally, a car exploding on the side of the road is enough to get noticed - but it's 2021, and people stopped giving a fark sometime last year (with video)
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
51
 
(NPR)
 
  
 
 Irony has become the weapon of choice for many extremists, which is pretty ironic since they and most of their followers would have less than a 25 percent chance of picking irony's correct definition from a 2-option multiple choice quiz
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
61
 
(Guardian)
 
  
 
 'Teeth have become the new boob job.' HEY HEY HEY - eyes down here, thankyouverymuch
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
56
 
(The New York Times)
 
  
 
 New York Times announces that it is retiring the term "Op-Ed," presumably to replace it with the much more accurate term, "trollbait"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
47
 
(Slate)
 
  
 
 Most Americans Would Take Pay Cuts to Keep Working From Home. Problem is, the corporations who employ them stopped reading after the headline's sixth word
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
67
 
(Law and Crime)
 
  
 
 Newly released bodycam footage clearly shows Atlanta Police officers....uh -oh...Saving a man from a burning car that crashed in a gas Station parking lot? Nicely done fellas
source: lawandcrime.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
126
 
(Evening Express)
 
  
 
 Bar company thinks that Scots, alcohol and throwing axes make for a good combination
source: eveningexpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
36
 
(KKTV Colorado Springs)
 
  
 
 Bomb destroys Port-a-potty and police have nothing to go on
source: kktv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
21
 
(Guardian)
 
  
 
 No your honor, I do not think I was breaking any laws when I was arrested for smearing Nutella on my body and running through a football game. You see, free will does not exist and the gods demanded I stop the Browns from winning. At any cost
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
37
 
(Fark)
 
  
 
 Sports, billionaires, sports billionaires, and poor sportsmanship are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz, April 11-17 First Barbecue of the Year Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
23
 
(WHDH Boston)
 
  
 
 Teenage girl chooses the wrong pedal and parks inside a NAPA auto parts store. Police say they're still investigating the cause of the accident; subby points at first two words of headline
source: whdh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
62
 
(LA Daily News)
 
  
 
 "An explosion believed to be caused by an electrical vault early Tuesday morning injured four people in Hollywood." - Subby not sure what an electrical vault is, but is pretty sure that they shouldn't 'esplode
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
45
 
(Washingtonian)
 
  
 
 This week in design fail: city public health department urges residents to "Take the sh*t." Difficulty: not San Francisco
source: washingtonian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
26
 
(The New York Times)
 
  
 
 West Virginia will give $100 savings bonds to people aged 16 to 35 who get vaccinated. Difficulty: You need to live in West Virginia
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
77
 
(We Are Central PA)
 
  
 
 Meet up and engage in "mutual combat"? That's a stabbing
source: wearecentralpa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
32
 
(BBC-US)
 
  
 
 "Makeshift crematoriums" is the nice way of saying "open-air funeral pyres in public parks" in Delhi these days
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
76
 
(Gannett Images)
 
  
 
 Photoshop this act of honer
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
11
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
  
 
 Shameless couple shagging in park in front of children admit to 'f***ing up' when confronted by furious mum
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
53
 
(Some Guy)
 
  
 
 500 couples from around the world time how long sex lasts using a stopwatch. Subby would have participated but no one offered an hourglass
source: bodyandsoul.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
72
 
(Yahoo)
 
  
 
 The most dangerous woman in America
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
107
 
(BBC-US)
 
  
 
 Do orgasms prevent illness? Are they intrinsically anti-fascist? Can they prevent totalitarianism? Meet Wilhelm Reich, the man behind the Sexual Revolution. When you think Sexual Revolution, the two words that spring to mind are "Wilhelm" und "Reich"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
33
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
  
 
 Man accused of firing gun, jumping off balcony, breaking into neighbor's home. Neighbor reportedly not even mad, because that's impressive
source: sandiegouniontribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
9
 
(NBC 15 Madison)
 
  
 
 Woman sues Bagel Bites for not using tomato sauce and cheese up to her standards
source: nbc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
73
 
(KMOV St. Louis)
 
  
 
 Domino's driver leaves pizza on car, dog takes pizza. Or as subby calls it, "a Domino's customer's best-case scenario"
source: kmov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
28
 
(AP News)
 
  
 
 Just when you think it's safe to go back in the water
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
56
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
  
 
 Hottie, 28, offered "random citizens" lap dances and then asked cops if they wanted to "bang" on sidewalk. Just another Saturday night in St. Petersburg
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
103
 
(KATV Little Rock)
 
  
 
 There's a naked man in the lobby
source: katv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
19
 
(Daily Mail)
 
  
 
 Hilton unveils new dog menu across 32 of its hotels, with dishes including Beef Doguignon and Mutt Roast. BONE appétit
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
28
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
  
 
 Don't forget to look up
source: sandiegouniontribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
40
 
(Fox 16 Little Rock)
 
  
 
 Can't tell what brand of beer it is. So something of value may have been lost
source: fox16.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
36
 
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