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Wed December 08, 2021
(WYRK Buffalo)
 
 
 
No. And if this isn't satire, why were you paid to write this?
source: wyrk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KUCI)
 
 
 
Today's 2-hour serving of '80s alt/post-punk/new wave includes music from Magazine, Gene Loves Jezebel, Ultravox, and New Order. Hear what commercial radio doesn't sound like on pastFORWARD #287. Starts @ 1:00 PM ET, LGT streaming options
source: kuci.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Captain Caveman makes unexpected, disoriented appearance at Wal-Mart
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Your overpaid overweight Massachusetts state police hard at work
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPXI.com)
 
 
 
Neighborhood name checks out
source: wpxi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Read this before the robot uprising
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPRI Rhode Island)
 
 
 
Alligator captured in (double checks notes) Massachusetts river
source: wpri.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
How the pandemic era has changed our bodies: Our shoes are too tight. And we've forgotten how to dance?
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRCG New Bloomfield)
 
 
 
Bus driver doesn't know when to stay off Facebook
source: krcgtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
To show how the upper crust of society has it easy, art student disguises herself as a socialite and lives the highlife in Beijing for free
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(CNN)
 
 
 
House passes $770 billion spending bill with nary a peep of outrage about inflation or how to pay for it
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BNNBloomberg)
 
 
 
London officially has the world's worst traffic. Residents of Tokyo, NYC, Houston, Moscow, LA, and Atlanta would weigh in but, well, you know
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(Independent)
 
 
 
Finland's Prime Minister, the youngest and second hottest of all world leaders behind Boris Johnson, apologises for going clubbing until 4am when she should have been isolating
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(CTV News)
 
 
 
Conservative politician calls on us to stop stigmatizing whiny selfish ignorant stupid chickenshiat crybabies bastards who stupidly remain unvaccinated. No
source: regina.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NL Times (Netherlands))
 
 
 
"My balls weigh 130 grams". Add salt to taste
source: nltimes.nl   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this middle finger
source: nomadicboys.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
The Humane Society of Summit County is looking for volunteer foster homes for 50 dogs this holiday season to give them a respite from shelter life & experience living in a home environment & get some extra TLC. Welcome to Woofday Wetnose Wednesday
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(Twitter)
 
 
 
Hours after studies warn that Omicron evades their vaccine, Pfizer drops their own study showing 3 doses of its Covid vaccine provide as much protection vs extra crispy Omicron as 2 shots provided vs original recipe Covid. And now you want fried chicken for lunch
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
War on Christmas has started, outside Fox news
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Major scandal rocks beauty pageant as dozens of contestants are banned over use of Botox. Fark: A camel beauty pageant
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Elizabeth Holmes has trouble remembering minor details from her meteoric rise in 2013-14, like cover stories in Fortune or pitches to Walgreens. If only there were a simple blood test to check for causes of memory loss
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Omicron is evading Pfizer's protection
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(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Not news: Australia is on fire. Again
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
It isn't just a regular college, it is an Elite College. It is also a scam with a football program
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Removing carbon from a cow is now achievable
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
And if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Give your restaurant a generic name? Enjoy the flood of hate-reviews and screaming phone calls
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Miami)
 
 
 
Caretaker working at a home. Answers door after midnight. Then it gets kidnappy
source: nbcmiami.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Employer to all minimum-wage employees: Here are the 11 rules of life. OBEY
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Climber can keep $170,000 in jewels he found on Mount Blanc. That's a lot of ice
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue December 07, 2021
(CityNews Toronto)
 
 
 
Unvaccinated traveller stranded at the airport thanks to new covid mandate triggers a surge in tiny violin sales
source: toronto.citynews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Today's Slatesplanation: Why we'll never stop mourning the American mall
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Field and Stream)
 
 
 
Minnesota officials NOT happy to find gold in Grace Chain of Lakes
source: fieldandstream.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Utterly confused cow stops traffic in a high steak game of lasso the bovine
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
"I just made $2.97 million, how do I avoid paying taxes on it?"
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
On December 7, 2021, the Hawaii Department of Health attacked the US Navy for previously attacking Hawaii
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
In response, Fark's squirrel was quoted as saying "damn. Dat ass"
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
God Jr. fails to make a chicken
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Dallas/Ft. Worth)
 
 
 
Alternate headline: Dog steals $100K from woman at DFW airport
source: dfw.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Not-so-bright thieves crash their car into a jewelry store after hours and steal $200 worth of fake display jewelry...and cause $20k damage to the building
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(MSN)
 
 
 
Canadian arrested for ransomware attacks in U.S. after two year probe. You probably don't know him
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Journalists in San Francisco are so daft that they think a couple that invests $50k/year, gives thousands to charity, and takes expensive vacations is living paycheck to paycheck
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these three stooges
source: d25tv1xepz39hi.cloudfront.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Woman gives birth in a Tesla while stuck in NYC traffic. Mother and child are in good condition, the Tesla's condition is presumed questionable
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Chile embraces the rainbow in a most loving (yet spicy) way
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Plumber who found the hidden money at Joel Osteen's church to get the $20K reward. Now that's a Royal Flush
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Viagra use associated with a nice, hard reduction of Alzheimer's risk
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Tesla films autopilot commercial. Guess they'll edit out the accident in post
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Alcohol-related deaths in the UK rose to record levels last year. Gee, it's almost as if something major were happening that drove people to drink more
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Times)
 
 
 
Record numbers of people quit jobs in 2021. We asked them, "how the hell did you do that?"
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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