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Tue February 18, 2020
(Bozeman Daily Chronicle)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready headline: "Inactive Bulgarian land mine causes parking lot closure at Montana State University"
source: bozemandailychronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this appreciator of art
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Company will print your face on a mask so you can unlock your phone without getting coronavirus
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Is that a bullet under the band-aid the doctor at the hospital gave you or are you happy to see me?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(OK Whatever)
 
 
 
Dog owners nominate man who invented hands-free poop bag holder for MacArthur Genius Grant. "It's great to have my hands back," says one of them
source: okwhatever.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Researchers eager to get in on that hot coronavirus pandemic action decide to uncover a medieval Black Death mass grave
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
"If you find it in your house, call us and we'll come to you. Please don't put it in your car"
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Man learns the perils of walking around drunk with no pants in a trailer park
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
The sleep tracker you wear as part of your quest to achieve a good night's sleep is the main thing preventing you from getting a good night's sleep
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Woman says Amazon's vibrator damn near wrecked her from reaching the promise land because she couldn't walk, but that it's still a 'gift from God'
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Bite)
 
 
 
Photoshop this frost bit
source: shortreads.nl   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFSB Connecticut)
 
 
 
Soulless ginger that spat on a police officer has a mugshot pretty much like you'd expect
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Hey China, what's with all of these re-education camps? "They were invited. Punch was served"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Facebook 'North Carolina Breaking News' page shares fake stories about Winston-Salem police; admins answer in Russian, police say
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Security guard shoots man after gun comes out, possibly because it's much more difficult to do it before that
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
List of which celebrities were searched for most on their site highlighted in Pornhub's "Year In Review." Creepy: Most of the results are for non-consensual deepfake porn. Awkward: Which is against Pornhub policy
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsTimes)
 
 
 
"To the person who helped themselves to Red Bull at the store without paying, you dropped your phone at the scene. Wanna trade?" - Southbury Police Department
source: newstimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KEYT Santa Barbara)
 
 
 
"The Santa Barbara Sheriff's Office would like to remind the community that the process of extracting oils from cannabis is not only illegal but extremely dangerous." Thank you, Sergeant Stadanko, we'll make a note of that
source: keyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Conversation)
 
 
 
Psychologist's study hypothesizes geeks are drawn to sci-fi to cope with life's disappointments and to evade the real world. Subby wonders what real jobs the authors tried to evade when they decided to write this psychology study
source: theconversation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WREG Memphis)
 
 
 
Above or below the Mason-Dixon Line? " A woman is facing assault charges after she was arrested for allegedly stabbing a family member on Sunday. According to arrest records, the woman and the victim have a sexual relationship and live together"
source: wreg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
China's Coronavirus Hospital has an opening for director
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
Boobies
 
Women of the year who don't like to wear clothes. Some images seem to have broken instagram. NSFW ... I repeat ... NSFW
source: smokeroom.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KETV Omaha)
 
 
 
Sixty-one years ago last month, the then youngest pair of spree-killers in the US started their murderous journey killing 11. Today, one of the killers will ask Nebraska today for a full pardon, while a member from subby's family will oppose
source: ketv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
When redesigning license plates for your province, best check with police on whether they are going to be readable at night
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Have no fear, America. The charge against the coronavirus is being lead by that bastion of modern epidemiology - Nebraska. No, seriously
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Cool grandma lets her grandkids smoke weed as long as they don't record themselves smoking it. You'll never guess what happened next though
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
If you are looking to further your studies on Hillbilly-American Speechifying, this video may be of great use to you. Bonus: Bees
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJAC TV Johnstown)
 
 
 
Man crashes rocket sled at 241 MPH, walks away unhurt, blames being distracted by something his stuffed tiger said in the third panel
source: wjactv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
Explosion in 3,2,1..."oh crap" Mover over Pisa, Dallas now has a leaning tower
source: wsrz.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
One would have to wonder why a man with a 'Crime Pays' forehead tattoo keeps getting arrested
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark and Schnitt)
 
 
 
Drew and Todd discuss the first few actually funny Corona Virus stories we've seen, plus all about radar detectors in Pennslyvania and how that ties into Italian tourism traffic scams. Bonus: what's funnier than a toilet in the middle of the road? You can probably guess it
source: podcasts.apple.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Syrian refugee flees war torn hellscape and settles in to his new home of Baltimore
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Verizon tells identity theft victim to claim thief's phone charges on his income taxes
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Q13 Fox)
 
 
 
'Surveillance video shows pot shop owner use bear spray to thwart armed robbery' Harsh, Man
source: q13fox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Conspiracy theorists now have the weather gods up against the wall after 'weather control weapon' exposed in Syria with mystery sky pattern caused by invisible aircraft
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop these illuminated kitchen shelves
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WREG Memphis)
 
 
 
Fark fark fark fark fark
source: wreg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wave3 Louisville)
 
 
 
Woman claims man kidnapped her, forced her to watch 'Roots' to 'understand her racism'
source: wave3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifewire)
 
 
 
The 2020 awards are in and Fark maintains its precarious hold on Fourth Best News Aggregator, for some reason. Subby thinks the judges are all drunken, psycho goat humpers who project their neurosis on to others. But hey, we work with what we have
source: lifewire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
Celebrity therapist, a former Playboy model, whose specialty was helping clients end and escape violent relationships before it's too late...well, since you're reading this on Fark
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
The Earl of Dumpsville (possible nsfw content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCJB Gainesville)
 
 
 
Gainesville doctor's hobby sets tongues wagging
source: wcjb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 5 Cleveland)
 
 
 
News: Child calls 911. Fark: Because her parents cut off her cell phone. Asinine: "Child" is 36 years old
source: news5cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NHK World (Japan))
 
 
 
Coronavirus crisis in Japan enters "new phase," as new cases can't be traced to Wuhan and preventive treatment doesn't seem to be preventing infections. Summon Gamera?
source: www3.nhk.or.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
A Scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, bankrupt, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Captain Jones gobbles turkey giblets. Priscilla Alden does the nasty
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
When you finally remember that time you took acid with your hubby in the '70s and ended up in Finland
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRIS Corpus Christi)
 
 
 
Let's see what's exploding and burning in Texas today. Ooooh, nice tower of fire there
source: kristv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon February 17, 2020
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Christian Witches Convene Coven, Confer, Conference, Conjure
source: activistmommy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
Three people murdered in Perris, CA; local efficiency experts named as prime suspects
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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