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Fri April 20, 2018
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Charges dropped against CNBC TV crew accused of smuggling fake bomb through Newark airport security because it wasn't a fake bomb and they weren't smuggling it
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Man steals ambulance from hospital, flips it over, ends up as patient in hospital. It's the circle of derp
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fire
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Someone decided to have a controlled burn by Interstate 75 right before Friday morning rush hour. There's no way that could backfire
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Office Owls are watching you procrastinate
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KGW Portland)
 
 
 
Oregon whale license plates are going into production, though it's not clear what a whale needs a license plate for - even in Oregon
source: kgw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times Union)
 
 
 
Three-legged dog named Tripod abandoned on cliff by two-fisted drinker named Defendant
source: timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
CNN once again continues to ask the tough questions - Why does smoking pot give you the munchies?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(1011 Now Lincoln)
 
 
 
Having solved all other crime, police arrest local meteorologist for stealing spring. Spring, if recovered will be inventoried and returned to its rightful owners
source: 1011now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Air Force Times)
 
 
 
Sure, we've all done dumb things when we're drunk, but most of us haven't stolen a C-130 transport and attempted to fly across the Atlantic for a booty call
source: airforcetimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
It's 4/20. And cops across America have jokes about it
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Pregnant woman goes into labor during tornado on Friday the 13th. Jason, Dorothy not on the list of names
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop these glowing orb lamps
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPEL 96.5 Lafayette)
 
 
 
Naked woman found eating cheetos in half filled tub. Or as submitter calls it, foreplay
source: kpel965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
St. Louis welcomes new bike-share program with unbridled enthusiasm. Just kidding, some of their GPS-equipped bicycles are being detected at the bottom of the Mississippi River
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
71-year-old Florida county commissioner faces multiple charges after authorities say he paid a couple living with him to be able to have sex with the man's wife, and the story only gets more Florida from there
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Submarine believed to have transported Nazi leaders to South America after WWII found. 129-year-old Argentinian National known only as 'Adolf H.' unavailable for comment
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Oregon has ended up with way more pot than it can smoke - to the tune of one million pounds
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
NewsFlash
 
Avicii /ft Choir of Angels
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Got a thing for dusting? Then, this toy soldier collection is for you. Over 250,000 toy soldiers in this massive, but tiny deployment. Add it to your house-sized train set and you'll have a whole lot of fun
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 San Diego)
 
 
 
'Humpty' the tortoise recovering after vet fixes broken shell, now slowing leading toward Burger King bathroom
source: fox5sandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Former 9-1-1 operator who hung up on callers "thousands of times" will serve 10 days in jail before starting in her new role as a Comcast customer support manager
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Homeless man steals beer truck, wears awesome shorts
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Check out my foxy badger which is not a euphemism
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Florida students walk out to protest school shootings. Since this is Florida, you can probably guess what happens next
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Logic files for divorce. Tired of not being used these days
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Canadian chocolate company goes viral in Scotland after encouraging customers to 'Eat shiat'
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Not just one apocalypse but a double whammy of apocalypses will end the world on both April 23 and June 24. Enjoy your final days
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
"Regional district seeks whereabouts of 'very patient-looking beaver' loved by kids." (Justin) Beaver trifecta complete
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox5 DC)
 
 
 
Starbucks: We need some good news, anyone have any ide....OH GOD
source: fox5dc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this majestic doggo
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Some very fine people are heading to a small German town to celebrate Hitler's birthday
source: news.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Trump won't attend Barbara Bush funeral, to "avoid disruptions" like having her climb out of the coffin to smack him upside the head
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
"Hey, if you could send us back all that secret research on remote mind controlling we accidentally sent you under that FOIA request, and forget it we would appreciate it.." Department of Mind Control
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Man accused of posing as a teenage boy to meet a girl for sex. Bonus: "Yeah, looks legit all right" photo goodness included in article
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KPAX Missoula)
 
 
 
One breath/long headline challenge: 3 police officers disciplined for having sex on city property with a police clerk who was fired for stealing narcotics from the evidence locker which will result in dozens of criminal cases being dismissed. *gasp*
source: kpax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Anti-semite DC council member visits Holocaust museum. Ditches halfway though the guided tour. Afterwards one of his aides asked if the Warsaw Ghetto was like a gated community. This ignorance makes me sad
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Looks like Prince Tampon will finally have his day in the sun
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
RCMP arrest BC beaver in one of the most Canadian stories you'll read today
source: vancouverisland.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
If you drink Starbucks, you're just an American hating Liberal, just like Hillary
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Daily News)
 
 
 
Man shot by LAPD identified as the Shaggy Bandit. Let's take off his mask to see who he really is
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
Chatham HOA votes to kill the beaver. Wally looks nervous
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTUU Alaska)
 
 
 
Highway travelers get a little tired of completely Farked-up driver sharing their space, and work together to solve the problem Alaska-style (with video)
source: ktuu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
School students asked to list the "positive aspects" of slavery
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
'Thish, hic, ish your, hic, pilot, hic, shpeaking'
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
A restaurant is looking for the man who publicly declared his intentions to 'marry' its mango chicken curry. Maybe he just crossed the road
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu April 19, 2018
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Give a humiliating haircut, off to jail you go
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Alabama set to execute 83-year-old murderer before nature takes its course
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Chinese traffic police have been letting people who commit minor moving violations off the hook if they confess on social media-and their post gets 20 or more likes. *click*
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Document Cloud)
 
 
 
Here are the Comey memos, for your reading pleasure
source: documentcloud.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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