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Mon April 18, 2016, 11:00 PM
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(NPR)
 
 
 
Shakespeare liked to set his plays around mealtimes which is why all of Subby's stories take place in Norms
source: npr.org
 
(Fansided)
 
 
 
Swimmers everywhere shake their heads knowingly as a guy with too much hair comes up a split second short of victory
source: fansided.com
 
(Daily Kos)
 
 
 
2016 may claim yet another victim: Conservative Talk Radio
source: dailykos.com
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Trump remembers 7 Eleven like it was 9-11. Ironic because Trump has never set foot in a 7 Eleven
source: slate.com
 
(US Magazine)
 
 
 
7-11, when the Slurpees fell
source: usmagazine.com
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
POV of Insane BMX'er invading Los Angeles
source: youtube.com
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
Philly phans phind relieph phlinging phree phavors...phark tards
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Pope invited Syrian asylum seekers start new life in Rome. Tea party types fly to Italy to yell at Pope and continue to make very little sense
source: theguardian.com
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
[Entertainment] Rap musical wins a Pulitzer Prize. Not to put down "Hamilton" but subby thought the Pulitzer was a serious award. Broadway musicals can get Pulitzers?
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fansided)
 
 
 
[Sports] With Kobe retired, someone had to step up and be the superstar who shoots their team out of a playoff game by missing 26 shots. Kevin Durant accepted the challenge
source: fansided.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
[Main] NJ motorcyclist killed after driving in the refrigerator lane
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
[Sports] "Here's a lesson for all Philadelphia sports teams - don't give your fans items they can throw"
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
 
 
Frankie say relax, when you want to come - it's no longer a mortal sin
source: theage.com.au
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
What do Russian rich kids do for fun? I mean, besides getting people to degrade themselves on film for money? The porn industry does that already
source: mirror.co.uk
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Spin this on your ecologically correct resume
source: ctvnews.ca
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Smokin' hot naked babe jumps from smokin' hot burning building. Rescued by fully clothed bystanders
source: mirror.co.uk
 
(Economist)
 
 
 
Trump is unfit to lead a great party. He is also unfit to lead the republicans
source: economist.com
 
(Science Alert)
 
 
 
Zika? NOBODY VACCINATE
 
(Courier Mail)
 
 
 
Chris Hemsworth's daughter is not sure what bathroom to use
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Hillary Clinton urges New Yorkers to vote for a president who will deliver results. So, basically, her since she's the only one who could actually follow through with campaign promises
source: nydailynews.com
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
[Main] Yellowstone National Park is in danger of being "loved to death" by tourists
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
You can probably forget about a nice reconciliation: Sanders just accused Hillary Clinton and the rest of the DNC of a massive money laundering scheme
source: news.vice.com
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
A BMW, some bikers and a pickup are involved in an accident. Guess who the douche is? Not that one, no not that one either
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Healthcare CEOs will never see pay decreases
source: ibtimes.com
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Donald Trump recalls watching the World Trade Center come down on 7/11. How convenient
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
The Green Climate Fund was just Clintoned in the boobies
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Showing what an effective leader he can be, during Bernie Sanders' quarter of a century in congress, only 3 bills he was chief sponsor on passed and became law and 2 of them were renaming post offices in his home state
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
The five worst GOP moments of the week. Hell, we're only one day into it and there are already five idiotic things that happened, including Sarah Palin
source: salon.com
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Aging forgotten Christian musician Pat Boone says Saturday Night Live exhibited "anti-Christian bias" for their hilarious God's Not Dead 2 parody
 
(My Northwest)
 
 
 
It's 89 degrees in Seattle. Hipsters reportedly sticky under all that flannel
source: mynorthwest.com
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Fitness instructor murdered in church by suspect in SWAT team outfit. Did she walk in on robbery? By burglar wearing a SWAT team outfit? Subby has his doubts
source: dailymail.co.uk
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Jim Cramer tries to determine the future of Netflix
source: cnbc.com
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Donald Trump confuses 7-11 for 9/11. A SECOND SLURPEE HAS STRUCK THE TOWER
source: nydailynews.com
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
[Main] 7/11 was a part time job
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Woman hears that President Obama received advance screening of Game of Thrones, files suit under Freedom of Information Act to force him to release it
source: arstechnica.com
 
(Politicus USA)
 
 
 
Bernie Sanders wants to make housing affordable again
 
(Polygon)
 
 
 
What an asshole
source: polygon.com
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Oh, bless your hearts, Bernie Bros., you really do think the election is rigged in favor of Hillary
 
(ieee spectrum)
 
 
 
Nanotubes, ASSEMBLE
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Better Call Saul is better than Breaking Bad." Well....yeah
source: slate.com
 
(WAOW Wausau)
 
 
 
Saturday Night Live skit stirs up strong emotions in heroin-soaked Wisconsin
source: waow.com
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Tennessee lawmaker notices her bathroom bill is unnecessary so she withdraws it. However, Jesus still hates gays, so don't you gays forget it
source: usatoday.com
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Metallica's manager says that YouTube is the devil and that streaming sites will be the death of music
source: nme.com
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
How to go to the bathroom when your boss walks in
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Donald Trump has lawyered up in anticipation he will lose the nomination at the convention
source: politico.com
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Trump may be popular in the state of New York, but in the city of New York, he's a pariah
source: cnn.com
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Utah governor is concerned, VERY concerned about his state's masturbation habits. It keeps him up at night, thinking about all those people whacking it. He thinks about this every day, constantly
source: cnn.com
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 10:00 PM
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
As a reminder to how inept his presidential campaign was run, Ben Carson will be on New York's ballot because he didn't submit the form to remove it
source: msnbc.com
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Bill O'Reilly snaps at "smear merchants" who accurately labeled him a racist
source: mediaite.com
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
SIDS is going down, and that's good news. Wait, no, sorry; Slate says it's bad news
source: slate.com
 
(12News Phoenix)
 
 
 
Lyft & cut
source: 12news.com
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Everybody Loves Raymond reunion cancelled
source: cnn.com
 
(Ex Astris Scientia)
 
 
 
The always excellent Ex Astra Scientia has added a comprehensive review of every time William Shatner has appeared in a ripped shirt or shirtless on Star Trek. Fascinating
 
(The Wrap)
 
 
 
Given the historical precedent, Axl Rose isn't really a half-bad choice to replace Brian Johnson
source: thewrap.com
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
RNC admits that they need a dictator at their convention. Open wide, Reince Priebus is coming
source: bigstory.ap.org
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Doctors tell Ace Frehley he's getting too old and can kiss his music career goodbye
source: tmz.com
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Stephen Colbert teaches Hillary Clinton how to eat cheesecake
source: deadline.com
 
(LiveLeak)
 
 
 
It can't be reasoned with It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead. Also, he is naked
source: liveleak.com
 
(The Wrap)
 
 
 
One Less Person Loves Raymond
source: thewrap.com
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Netflix CEO is "not worried about Amazon"
source: cnbc.com
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Trump's hometown is embracing him with hatred
source: cnn.com
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
St Louis officer Darren Wilson indicted on multiple fraud counts
source: fox2now.com
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
7/11: Lever forget
source: cnn.com
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Yertle "optimistic" about a second ballot at the Convention
source: politico.com
 
(Right Wing Watch)
 
 
 
Founder of domestic Christian terrorist group Oath Keepers says he and his insurgents are ready to fight the alliance between liberals, Black Lives Matter, anarchists, gangs, drug cartels and jihadists determined to destroy western civilization
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Smoking hot math teacher arrested for planning to see how many times 13 goes into 24
source: usatoday.com
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Kicked off a Napa Valley wine train for being black or being obnoxiously loud? You decide
source: mercurynews.com
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
New York Fox anchor tells Ted Cruz he won't win the state
source: mediaite.com
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Like Obama's visits to 57 states, The Drumpf remembers when the towers came down at the 7/11
source: yahoo.com
 
(WISTV)
 
 
 
Khhhhaaaaannnnn
source: wistv.com
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Ted Cruz refuses to meet with peaceful Muslim leaders, with his representative claiming "the event was organized by groups associated with Islamic supremacism." Bonus: Said representative is a birther who believes Obama is a secret Muslim
source: thehill.com
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Colorado school district purchases 10 semi-automatic assault rifles, asks teachers to layoff
 
(Townhall)
 
 
 
Ohio University College Republicans mock speech codes, safe spaces, and other stupidity, while informing everyone of what the real world is like. Offended snowflakes, not smart enough to get the message demand an investigation for offending them
source: townhall.com
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
There's an app for... What?
source: breitbart.com
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Remember the teen who was forced to take chemo and because of it went into remission. Well her cancer is back and now's she 18 now and can make her own choices to not take chemo
source: nbcnews.com
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
The best video of a bulldozer fight you will see today
source: abc.net.au
 
(Rocketnews 24)
 
 
 
Because nothing makes a bolder fashion statement than carrying around something that looks like an oversized teapot. Or wearing a soft squishy muscle vest to go with your ferretman costume. Or the scarf/sleeve combo
 
(Keloland)
 
 
 
Bishop has solution for all those freeloading homeless people in his homeless shelter. Charge them rent. Brilliant
source: keloland.com
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Satanists act more like Jesus than Christians do
source: rawstory.com
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Bernie Sanders opposes progress, this time slamming a natural gas pipeline betwixt New York and Pennsylvania. Way to voice your desire to kill jobs, gramps
source: reuters.com
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Deep inside VR porn - you already put your Google Glass on before clicking the link
source: mashable.com
 
(Pro Football Talk)
 
 
 
To the shock of absolutely no one, 49ers ticket sales show that there aren't any real 49ers fans
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 09:00 PM
(Guardian)
 
 
 
[Sports] Protip: if your foul ball netting comes in more than one piece, be sure to properly secure the seams
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Misogynistic douche Joss Whedon finally admits he's a douche. You're halfway there, man
source: deadline.com
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Bad Homer, no donut
source: gizmodo.com
 
(WDAY Fargo)
 
 
 
Woman busted in traffic stop with over 70 kilos of math. Not a typo
source: wday.com
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
"Just because heat enters the deep ocean doesn't mean it has to stay there." February 2016 kicks January's butt for hottest month in recorded history
source: gizmodo.com
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
ISS: "WTF did I just take a picture of? I thought it was a planet, but it looks really weird" Carrier Lost
source: mirror.co.uk
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Dumbass who was posing for pic in pit area and not paying attention when Kyle Busch accidentally hit her, is outraged that he hasn't checked to see how she's doing
source: newsbake.com
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Trump refers to 9/11 as "7-Eleven." Hey, both contain Arabs
source: thehill.com
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Dairy industry could save millions of gallons of water filtering and reusing water from cheddar cheese whey. No way, whey? Whey
source: phys.org
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
"Negative Ghostrider, the pattern is full" i.e.; stuff Obama forgot to bring up to Putin
source: thehill.com
 
(The Chive)
 
 
 
Nothing says "Hello Kitty" like a permanent face tattoo. Sadly, that's not the worst tattoo on this list. Click to the end, if you dare (and bring a tattoo of the plug tag with you)
source: thechive.com
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Could a typographical glitch save the planet and bring the Paris climate deal into force early?
source: theguardian.com
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
[Main] O_o
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Most relaxed dude ever breaks the record for Super Mario Brothers in a live recording
source: youtube.com
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
If you were at this Turangi supermarket on New Zealand's North Island you probably had a huge case of the munchies last Friday, you see the Kiwi police accidentally smoked it out with their marijuana burn-off
source: 9news.com.au
 
(Distractify)
 
 
 
Seems like same-sex weddings have an extra disadvantage when it comes to inviting the crazy aunt
source: distractify.com
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
How is Bernie Sanders going to take the New York primary? Why just with his little secret weapon of workers at the Working Families Party, that's all
source: motherjones.com
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Saudi Arabia has ten thousand spoons when all it needs is a knife to behead atheists
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
[Main] Photoshop these eyes
source: gannett-cdn.com
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
What a load of carp
source: pjstar.com
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Condemned man requests Italian for last meal. Unfortunately he forgot how old Sophia Loren is
source: ajc.com
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
[Main] Don't be creepy. Don't be creepy. Don't be creepy
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
NBA Playoffs: Golden State Warriors host the Houston Rockets. Here's the TV schedule, and Live stream
source: examiner.com
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 08:00 PM
(Medium)
 
 
 
Delusional dickbag supports other delusional dickbag. Subby was halfway through before realizing that this was NOT satire
source: medium.com
 
(YouTube)
 
Video
 
Take the hint guys. She's obviously not into bondage
source: youtube.com
 
(Townhall)
 
 
 
Conservative White Male trolls college liberals by telling them that he identifies as a Chinese Woman trans-gender trans-racial person, and then showing how they react
source: townhall.com
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"Bad influence" is about the harshest thing you can be called in Canadia
source: bbc.com
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
High lead levels in Michigan drinking water, not just for poor people anymore
source: detroitnews.com
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
"If you eat food, you are being lied to"
source: tampabay.com
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Boyfriend is just 'exhausted' from having his woman addicted to having sex 10 TIMES A DAY, all this coming and going, going and coming
source: thesun.co.uk
 
(Boomstick Comics)
 
 
 
It's official. Walton Goggins is now the budget Joe Manganiello
 
(IFL Science)
 
 
 
Best Korea volcano is best volcano
source: iflscience.com
 
(Fox 5 Atlanta)
 
 
 
[Politics] Armed anti-Islam rally in Atlanta draws two thousand...Wait, no. Strike that. Anti-Islam rally draws two supporters
source: fox5atlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TBK Magazine)
 
 
 
If you do not know what JNCO Jeans are, chances are you didn't graduate in 1996 or had your wallet on a chain, and God bless you child for that
source: tbkmagazine.com
 
(Times Union)
 
 
 
Burglar arrested for stealing $1300 worth of gum. Activists who only skimmed the headline plan protest march
source: timesunion.com
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Boston cancels North Carolina concert on more than a feeling
source: money.cnn.com
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
One less person loves Raymond
source: tmz.com
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
"Everybody Loves Raymond" actress Doris Roberts passes away at age 90, leaves nothing in the will for Robert
source: ktla.com
 
(RedState)
 
 
 
Donald Trump is secretly looking for a way out of his Troll Prank that went too far says nervous republicans
source: redstate.com
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
NYPD using their nightsticks on a woman of the night, in exactly the way you think they are
source: gawker.com
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Champion of the Poor, Bane of Wall Street, and Crazy Old Uncle Bernie Sanders's wife may have been involved in a real estate scam to rip off people
source: foxnews.com
 
(New York Magazine)
 
 
 
Rex Ryan to introduce Trump at a rally. Says he likes his outspoken demeanor. And he's got a thing for small appendages
source: nymag.com
 
(Yahoo)
 
Video
 
Heroic bar owner fights off armed robber while holding newborn baby
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 07:00 PM
(96.1 KISS)
 
 
 
We'll do it live
source: 961kiss.com
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Darwin ruined the environment of an Atlantic island; this means evolution is a lie, Sarah Palin is the new dean of MIT, and Bill Nye must gay marry Ken Ham
source: bbc.com
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Netflix shares plunge on news that new subscribers are leve[REBUFFERING 10% 35% 55% 78% 78% 78% 78% 78% 78%]
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Colorado residents claim wind farm is giving them nausea. Say, you know what's good for nausea?
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
'Everybody Loves Raymond' Mom, Doris Roberts, Dies at 90
source: wpoc.iheart.com
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Two children's authors go missing same day and same area in this compelling mystery next on Midsomer Murders, right after this break
source: mirror.co.uk
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
[Business] Comcast found an untapped market of people to under-serve, over-charge and abuse ...... itself
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
St. Joseph, MO becomes the Mecca for overeaters this summer as a McDonald's there offers all you can eat French Fries
source: cnbc.com
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
The creepiest collection of people looking at Donald Trump ever
source: theweek.com
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Everybody Hates Funerals
source: tmz.com
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Whose cunning plan was it relocate the school besides a toxic waste dump? That's NOT thinking of the children
source: shanghaiist.com
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Clinton-DNC Joint Fundraising Raises Serious Campaign Finance Concerns
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Everybody Love's Raymond's mom Doris Roberts is dead
source: news.com.au
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Europeans take no notice as Kim Kardashian walks around in tight outfit with fur coat
source: dailymail.co.uk
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Everyone Dies, Raymond
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Article on "How Donald Trump could woo delegates with his toys". American politics: where circus meets kindergarten
source: abcnews.go.com
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Robots are getting hotter with this new entry from China
source: cnet.com
 
(Metronews.ca)
 
 
 
Cooking up your baby in a Crispr sounds bad but it's really a good thing, we swear
source: metronews.ca
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Clinton sets up agreement with DNC, violates campaign finance laws. This is the break Sanders has been hoping for
source: politico.com
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Because a well-armed Boro Park Orthodox Jewish community is a safe one being the reason they paid NYPD officers nearly $1 million in bribes to score pistol permits for its members
source: nypost.com
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
R.I.P., Hall of Patriots
source: gawker.com
 
(Wrestling Inc)
 
 
 
WCW 2.0 out of money
 
(The New Civil Rights Movement)
 
 
 
Duke may not suck but they have no problem with those who do
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Bills Coach to welcome Trump to buffalo. Apparently, in addition to feet, Rex likes little hands too
source: msn.com
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Pearl Jam next band to cancel North Carolina concert in protest of anti-LGBT law
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
[Main] 2016 Strikes Again
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Eventbrite)
 
 
 
Doobie rally outside the UN Special Session on Drug Policy, be there or be 4/20 square
source: eventbrite.com
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
"Hey, Jock, you've got a broad on your hands today" - Thanks Kathrine Switzer, you changed sports for the better forever
source: deadspin.com
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
People of the northeast United States, are you ready for the hot cicada sex season? Cause they're back by the billions
 
(Perpetuelle)
 
 
 
Elderly veteran learns that the Rolex he bought for $120 in 1960 while stationed in Germany is now worth just a bit more than he paid for it
 
(Liberty Maniacs)
 
 
 
Team Sanders tries to have company selling "Bernie Is My Comrade" T-shirts shut down. In Soviet Farkpoliticstabistan, ironic tags you
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
It was 1982 and the American economy was deep in recession ... good times that you probably didn't know about
source: theweek.com
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 06:00 PM
(CNN)
 
 
 
Brazil's disgraced, impeachable president says she feels "great injustice" at getting caught in the midst of her corruption
source: cnn.com
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
AGs, activists accused of 'collusion' on Exxon probe amid new emails
source: foxnews.com
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Showing boobs while serving beer? That's a paddlin'
source: sltrib.com
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Republicans square off with protesters outside the Supreme Court
source: thehill.com
 
(KOCO Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
[Main] Submitted for your approval: Man who claims to be from the future (where everyone is dead) is arrested after assaulting an employee and stealing chicken and bacon from a fast-food restaurant
source: koco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: Our family has an elderly cat that needs to be put to sleep. But my husband suddenly thinks that euthanizing the cast is an act of murder. So what's the right solution here? How can I convince him killing a kitten isn't murder?"
source: slate.com
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Old man yells at cloud
source: msnbc.com
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Target increases minimum wage to $10. OOOOH BIG SPENDERS
source: reuters.com
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Fox News "Logic" is that Hillary Clinton must prove she is not crooked because Trump labeled her "Crooked Hillary"
source: rawstory.com
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Elementary school refuses to allow kids to wear Donald Trump masks during talent show
source: mediaite.com
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Gay Republican confronts Ted Cruz on live Town Hall, asking "What would you do to protect me and my husband?"
source: rawstory.com
 
(Fox 23 Tulsa)
 
 
 
The internet is outraged that one of the Duggar cult--this time, a sister--put a 4 year-old child at risk by not restraining him properly in the backseat of her car
source: fox23.com
 
(Austin News KXAN)
 
 
 
Homosexual Austin pastor sues Whole Foods for writing "LOVE WINS F**" on his cake, a discriminatory slur that the store's manager said "nothing could be done about." How about your wholesome grocer now, hipsters?
source: kxan.com
 
(NewNowNext)
 
 
 
Why is this Mexican pirate so concerned about what bathroom people use?
source: newnownext.com
 
(Daily Edge (Ireland))
 
 
 
Awkward is having to look at David Beckham's giant junk right outside your office window ...or not
source: dailyedge.ie
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
In order to prove the water in Flint is safe and a little lead never hurt anyone, Rick Snyder has vowed to drink nothing but Flint water for thirty days
source: reuters.com
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Stana Katic and Tamala Jones will not return for season nine of Castle
source: deadline.com
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Sandy Hook Truther Gets Two Years Probation For Harassing Victim's Family. Six teachers and twenty children unavailable for comment
 
(EuroNews)
 
 
 
AC/DC announce that they've got a new singer to fill in for Brian Johnson on their upcoming tour and it's... oh Jebus please. No, no, no, no
source: euronews.com
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
[Main] Amid the ongoing water crisis in Flint, Michigan Governor Rick Snyder threatens suicide on national television
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Here is the full list of this year's Pulitzer Prize winners
source: avclub.com
 
(NewNowNext)
 
 
 
Remember gay hook up group isn't racist, just politically incorrect, as long as there is ONE non-self hating Black dude, even if group will not allow and other Blacks, Asians or Hispanics
source: newnownext.com
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
Producers of Love It or List It being sued because the two hosts of the show are full of shiat and the contractors they hire are less than desirable and have piss-poor customer reviews and are often unlicensed
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
When going to a bulldozer fight in the streets always bring your own bulldozer ..it evens out the score
source: shanghaiist.com
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
The electoral college has "doomed" Bernie Sanders. Well, that presumes he didn't doom himself by being a crotchety, foreign-policy malcontent
source: theweek.com
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Perhaps it's time to start considering that perhaps North Carolina passed it's anti LGBTQ law to keep crappy bands out of the state
source: ew.com
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Real life battle bots in China
source: nypost.com
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Looks like I'm not done with the Baileys
 
(The Daily Caller)
 
 
 
Planned Parenthood President: "A Woman Voting For Ted Cruz Is Like A Sheep Voting for A Scotsman" Or something
source: dailycaller.com
 
(EuroNews)
 
 
 
Six people arrested in Georgia for trying to sell $200 million worth of uranium-238
source: euronews.com
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Rule No. 1: When you're in a hole, STOP DIGGING. Rule No. 2: If your Lamborghini is on fire, STOP REVVING IT AT THE STOPLIGHT
source: youtube.com
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Phil Jackson to Luke Walton: Howzabout we pay you millions of dollars to come coach the New York Knicks in world famous Madison Square Garden? Luke Walton to Phil Jackson: Howzabout Hells to the no and Fark You
source: espn.go.com
 
(Boomstick Comics)
 
 
 
Daisy Ridley and J.J. Abrams reunite for a supernatural movie, where a possible Han Solo appears
 
(LiveLeak)
 
Video
 
Trump makes surprise visit to Russia. (Not safe for work)
source: liveleak.com
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
IRS gives Texas residents rain check
source: abcnews.go.com
 
(LiveLeak)
 
Video
 
This video, you can't explain it
source: liveleak.com
 
(Calgary Sun)
 
 
 
Clever: Being the Prime Minister of a G7 country and being able to give a decent explanation of how quantum computing works. Machiavellan: Getting a reporter to ask you said question at a press conference by asking that it be asked
source: calgarysun.com
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
It's not pollution when guns are involved
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
[Main] Do not want
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Russians finally disclose what it costs to keep their commie idol in pristine condition
source: bbc.com
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
Does this mean scientists haven't really figured out why my dog stares at me when he poops?
source: theweek.com
 
(Special Broadcasting Service)
 
 
 
The Caste system is alive and well, in Australia?
source: sbs.com.au
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Pentagon promises rewards to hackers who come forward and report security problems they found on its websites. Admiral Ackbar unavailable for comment
source: abcnews.go.com
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Michigan Governor to drink Flint water for at least a month to demonstrate safe consumption. Coming up next: Michigan Governor rushed to hospital
source: abcnews.go.com
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
There's a Star Trek shuttlecraft hanging out in Vegas
source: theverge.com
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 05:00 PM
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Mitch McConnell (R) "increasingly optimistic" GOP convention in Cleveland will turn into true American riot
 
(WNCN Raleigh)
 
 
 
[Politics] It's OK. Not much of a college town anyway
source: wncn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
[Main] All countries have great national pastimes. For Egypt, it's making world leaders sit there and listen while their national anthems are completely massacred by the Egyptian national army band
source: foxtrotalpha.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Miami is desperately searching for ways to stop people from using their beach
source: miamiherald.com
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Watch the last two hours and forty minutes of Titanic's voyage in real time. Spoiler alert: it sinks
source: avclub.com
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Bone found in park is not human
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Maybe Homer Simpson Wasn't The Best Safety Inspector For The Nuclear Plant
source: king5.com
 
(Variety)
 
 
 
World's angriest Kanye fan sues over being tricked into using tidal
source: variety.com
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
[Politics] Thrifty Hoosiers cut out the middle man and go straight to the #NeverTrump phase
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Protesting Trump, good idea. You did what? Ewwww.... but you did make the news
source: rawstory.com
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Prep schools wrestle with sex abuse accusations against faculty. Jim Hastert releases statement saying. "I've never even been to New Hampshire"
source: nytimes.com
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
[Geek] Maybe it really wasn't cigarettes that killed the dinosaurs
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
[Geek] If you have proficiency in .NET, JavaScript, VBScript, and COBOL languages along with "a numbness to the absence of excellence," this job may just be for you
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Mormon capital considering stripping movie theater of its liquor license after showing Deadpool since it has "simulated sex acts." Subby is surprised they had one to begin with
source: bigstory.ap.org
 
(Digital Spy)
 
 
 
With any luck this movie will end Zack Snyder's career
source: digitalspy.com
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Scientists discover where you lost your train
source: nbcnews.com
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Target's employees get a raise for the second year in a row
source: cnbc.com
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Cue the tiny violin and fainting goats: Wall Street is getting its fee fees hurt by Sanders
source: msn.com
 
(Boomstick Comics)
 
 
 
John C. McGinley will put on his scrubs again to fight evil
 
(Fox Sports)
 
 
 
Cheater, sad that he got caught cheating, and lying about cheating, feels cheated
source: foxsports.com
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Police get pretty tired of making arrests
 
(Boomstick Comics)
 
 
 
The Bella twins get their own show where there will be fighting, crying, and love-making with John Cena
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The Last Supper or The Last Gulper? You decide
source: yahoo.com
 
(Economist)
 
 
 
South Korea men have become so vain, that they're now the world's leading market for men's cosmetics, responsible for 20% of global sales
source: economist.com
 
(Press-Enterprise (So. Cal))
 
 
 
No, you can't send in your taxes from Coachella
source: pe.com
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Juan Manuel Fangio is the best F1 driver of all time. It's science. No, really
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
[Politics] "Only Bernie Sanders can break the power of capitalism in the US" Yes, we know, that's why we're voting for the other one
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
BLACK LIVES MATTERed
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Despite what the bigots and anti-same-sex parenting advocates would have you think, there is 'no differences' between children of same-sex and opposite-sex parents
source: pix11.com
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Identical twin brothers to undergo plastic surgery so their identical twin brides can tell them apart
source: mirror.co.uk
 
(WWE)
 
 
 
[Sports] WWE RAW from the UK - Who will be in charge tonight? Will Emma get herself an Irish lass-kicking? Will the UK crowds laugh at Sheamus' beard the way wee do? It's your Monday Night RAW thread, live on tape - 8PM EDT on USA/pre-show 7:30PM
source: wwe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
[Main] Remember when Times Square was sleazy in the '80s when a sex market and drug trade thrived in the area? Good, sleazy times
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DecoStoic.com)
 
 
 
Answer: Depends on whether you intend to ever actually experience coitus
source: decostoic.com
 
(Danny V)
 
 
 
Funeral home owners face stiff penalties for dealing drugs and firearms
source: b1027.com
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
DaVinci relatives found. Not that it was hard to find people with four arms and four legs
source: foxnews.com
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Obama's tough words and outspoken criticisms regarding our overseas allies have left many with hurt feelings. Geez, Obama, would it hurt you to apologize every now and then? Maybe not try to act so tough all the time? Diplomacy, ever heard of it?
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Here we go again
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Booth heads to Washington. This is not a repeat from April 14, 1865
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Olympic swimmer in trouble after "forceful" in-flight nipple tweak. Should have gone with the gentle nipple tweak, dude
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
These groups have SJWs running scared. Number 3 will surprise you
source: vox.com
 
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
Samuel L Jackson to unruly fan: English motherf*cker, do you speak it? I'm NOT posing with you for a photo
source: standard.co.uk
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 04:00 PM
(joe.co.uk)
 
 
 
Scottish newspaper couldn't care less that Kanye West visited Skye
source: joe.co.uk
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Australian cat-killing machine deployed. It's more complicated than a laser on a whirligig
source: theguardian.com
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Woman wearing only her underwear survives 3 story fall from a burning building thanks to bystanders. That's hot
source: dailymail.co.uk
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
San Francisco is facing a significant dike problem
source: latimes.com
 
(DecoStoic.com)
 
 
 
The only campaign commercial you'll need to watch this election season
source: decostoic.com
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Ammon and Ryan Bundy you are charged with multiple Federal felonies involving obstruction federal agents in the performance of their duties how do you plead? We plead pocket copy of the Constitution and move for a writ of potato, your honor
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Bruce Jenner is back
 
(The College Fix)
 
 
 
College Republicans feeling triggered and lacking for a safe space, due to not getting overwhelming support for their mocking of trigger warnings and safe spaces
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Theme: Well, there's your problem right there
 
(Laughing Squid)
 
 
 
[Geek] When you give your 6-year-old snowflake some colored construction paper, the result is usually a mess. When you do the same to a wasp that builds its nests out of paper, you get art works
source: laughingsquid.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Reince Priebus' sweet release as chairman of the RNC inches ever closer
source: cnn.com
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Ever wonder what happened to Monica Lewinsky?
source: theguardian.com
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
After getting outmaneuvered and bamboozled out of delegates at yet another district convention in Georgia, angry Trump supporters storm out of the meeting, take their American flag, and go home. Well, not THEIR American flag, exactly
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Note to Erick Erickson: sitting on your ass all day long will markedly increase your risk for fatal blood clots
 
(WFAA Fort Worth)
 
 
 
Finally, a monster truck owner does something other than drive around and compensate for their...shortcomings: "That's a redneck rescue I do believe,"
source: wfaa.com
 
(NHL)
 
 
 
Will the Caps make it one game closer to being Ovi for Philly? Will Dallas put Minnesota that much closer to being has-Benns? Will the Kings prove to be a Thornton in the Sharks side? Puck drop at 7:00 PM. Fill the goon juice and buckle in
source: nhl.com
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
"A late Sunday crash between an Indiana State Police car and a horse and buggy ended with the trooper being hospitalized, and the horse running back home"
source: indystar.com
 
(Patheos)
 
 
 
Allen West is ready if the American people call on him to be President. In the same vein, Submitter is ready to replace Robert Downey in the Iron Man role and if called upon, to pleasure Kate Upton
source: patheos.com
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Mouthpiece at Koch Brothers funded "policy center" explains why land in the western U.S. are being managed in a way that might financially harm "people" who with vested interests in opposing alternate sources of energy
source: thehill.com
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Finally an explanation for how you got syphilis at the mall on Saturday
source: arstechnica.com
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
DOW closed above 18,000 for the first time since last summer. S&P 500 also closed today at a new year high. When is this Obama recession ever going to end?
source: money.cnn.com
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Man high on Ambien gets online and decides he wants to buy something that's horny, hairy, and enjoys getting wet
source: aol.com
 
(How Stuff Works)
 
 
 
States scramble to find lethal injection drugs, obviously didn't check Grandpa's garage
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Trump's for sale. Shocking new portrait hits the open market
source: marketwatch.com
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Castle loses its queen
source: deadline.com
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
Police searching for burglary suspect with extraordinarily apt tattoo
source: ktar.com
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
Video
 
Construction workers fight with bulldozers because they were pissed off and had bulldozers
 
(Fox Sports)
 
 
 
The rise and fall of Rafael Palmeiro
source: foxsports.com
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Neither snow nor rain nor prison stays these dildos from complete self-appointed attention whoredom
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Donald "Stanky Leg" Trumps Fired
source: examiner.com
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
With 10 days to go before the 2016 NFL Draft, here is a ranking of all the GMs to argue over
 
(Equestria Daily)
 
 
 
Seth Green pulls a Scott Evil and killed our souls, just a little (Not safe for work)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
"Bubbles was being a handful, to put it lightly," Broccoli said
source: sfgate.com
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Atlanta man demonstrates that ambulance is not his preferred method of transportation to the hospital
source: ajc.com
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
When I Played D&D, the "Open Door" Spell Had a Physical Component - a Hand Grenade
source: thelocal.de
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
[Main] Sometimes it's not enough just to tell kids what not to do; sometimes you gotta demonstrate WHY not
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATV Little Rock)
 
 
 
Yet another guy proves that child pron aficionados look pretty much exactly like you'd expect
source: katv.com
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
HILLARY CLINTON SUPPORTERS PANIC. NBC/WSJ Poll shows Clinton's national lead over Sanders down to two points
source: nbcnews.com
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Perfect response: "When you're old enough you can have as many as you want"
source: nydailynews.com
 
(Pravda Report)
 
 
 
Russia to build plastic roads after all asphalt roads fall apart
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 03:00 PM
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Why is Yahoo Japan so successful? Maybe because Yahoo doesn't actually manage it
source: latimes.com
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
It's time to stop the Powerpuff Girls
source: boingboing.net
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
New jury saddled with determining price of damaged horse semen
source: nydailynews.com
 
(E! Online)
 
 
 
Rosario Dawson Arrested at Washington, D.C. Protest, Says Police Acted "Really Lovely"
source: eonline.com
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Houston You have a problem
source: sfgate.com
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
Michael Moore threatens to pull his latest movie from theaters in North Carolina, prompting a huge yawn of outrage
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Big news: Michael Moore weighs in on the transgender issue by threatening to eat North Carolina
 
(Pravda Report)
 
 
 
Russia's Sukhoi PAK FA T-50 fighter jet changes rules of the game in aviation
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
The Supreme Court seems to be deadlocked on Obama's immigration case
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
You steal our delegacy, we steal your flag. It's the Trump supporter's way
 
(Boomstick Comics)
 
 
 
'Jurassic World 2' finds a director in 'The Orphanage'
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
"Officer, the car came out of nowhere. Nowhere. No, really. Out of nowhere"
source: nydailynews.com
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
[Sports] Realizing his last shot at a life of wealth and fame as an NFL quarterback was slipping away from him, Johnny Manziel gets serious, sober, and buckles down with a QB coach to improve his game. Just kidding, he's playing in the ball-pit at Coachella
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
More than a feeling for LGBT, less than a feeling for North Carolina
source: money.cnn.com
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Some people have "Trump" bumper-stickers, some wear these red "Make America great again" hats...and then there are these guys
source: abcnews.go.com
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
"How Amazon plans to avoid making a profit this holiday season"
source: vox.com
 
(Philadelphia Magazine)
 
 
 
Neighbor upset with boy who flaps like bird or Munchausen MOTY writes herself angry letter for internet karma. Get your pitchforks ready FARK
source: phillymag.com
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"'I was born without a womb, cervix and vagina." That's cool, baby: neither was I
source: bbc.com
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
They obviously pissed someone off
source: nydailynews.com
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Carnival changes their tune and now will accept bookings for all Americans including those born in Cuba and will not sail to Cuba until their government ends the discriminatory policy against Cuban born Americans. Bad pub and a lawsuit are effective
source: miamiherald.com
 
(Daily News Journal)
 
 
 
Parents are more than just a little outraged that Murfreesboro bpolice stormed into an elementary school and handcuffed 5 kids between the ages of 10 and 6 and carted them off to jail. Their "crime"? Not trying to break up a fight they witnessed
source: dnj.com
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Remember, wrongthink can be punished
source: foxnews.com
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
[Entertainment] George R.R. Martin has a suggestion for a 'Game of Thrones' spin-off. Naturally it's based on another set of stories he hasn't finished yet
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Bridge-gate principals invoke Costanza defense
source: nj.com
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Here's a list of discounts for Tax Day
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Arab World 2014: We pledge to rebuild Gaza World Bank: Really? where is the money? Arab World 2016: Let me check my other gold Lambo's seat cushions
source: bigstory.ap.org
 
(Boomstick Comics)
 
 
 
Mel Gibson, Kurt Russell, and Kate Hudson are the new 'Three Amigos'
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Good: Sperm Donor #9623 is healthy and working toward his PhD. Bad: he lied on the paperwork, and actually has genetically-linked schizophrenia and a burglary conviction
source: nytimes.com
 
(LA Daily News)
 
 
 
Colorado river's alternate ending gets a spring cleaning
source: dailynews.com
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
#Tabascghazi
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Fun fact: A key element of representing yourself at your own trial is to understand the charges against you
source: dailymail.co.uk
 
(Jerusalem Post)
 
 
 
Bus Bombing in Israel wounds 21, because knife stabbings weren't doing enough to kick off another war in the region
source: jpost.com
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
How farked is Venezula? A woman in a chain-mail dress has been seen in the capital singing "No necesitamos otro héroe"
source: gawker.com
 
(Boomstick Comics)
 
 
 
The kid from 'E.T.' opens up about meeting Michael Jackson
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Dad's stranger-danger test makes you want to go ahead and take the candy from the nice stranger
source: newser.com
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Et tu, pizza delivery guy?
source: newser.com
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
Beggars can't be choosers, but they apparently can be college students
source: newser.com
 
(The Daily Caller)
 
 
 
Hillary taking life lessons from SNL's Leslie Jones naked and afraid character, no word about Bill's view on Peter Dinklage
source: dailycaller.com
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
[Entertainment] This film has been rated ZZZ
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 8000 La Crosse)
 
 
 
SNL gets reaction from viewer other than asking how the show is still on the air - viewer instead asks how a certain skit made it on air then writes a letter to the network. Viewer is a cop
source: news8000.com
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
You should read this article about the psychology of procrastinating tomorrow
source: vox.com
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 02:00 PM
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
An Anti-Muslim rally organized by a Trump supporter at GA's state capitol building brought out all of Georgia's patriotic citizens who were will to stand up to the growing Islamic menace. Both of them
source: rawstory.com
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
It would be nice to make it through one Monday at work without a bulldozer duel but nooooooo
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
I present the candidate for Satirist Laureate, for the State of North Carolina
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
[Politics] Clinton campaign: 'Democrats are misogynists'
source: theamericanmirror.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
[Main] Toronto building scaffolding collapses, injuring 4. Hockey ratings expected to be unaffected
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
[Main] Ric Romero Memorial Consumer Desk at KABC reminds you that today is Tax Day and that millions of Americans are expected to file. "People have until midnight to file the paperwork"
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
Hillary chooses to simply brush off the nickname Trump gave her, missing a prime chance to give him one of her own. Something like "Daddy's Money Donny" or "More Racist than Reagan" could have been nice
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Hillary Clinton keeps hot sauce in her bag, thinks it's quite corking
source: salon.com
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Spend May 7th with the cops (getting your warrants cleared up) so you can be free to spend Mothers' Day with your mom
source: rcsd.net
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
[Sports] The Baltimore Ravens sign the worst running back in the NFL. Roll Tide
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Erick Erikson recovering at home after severe complications from a pulmonary embolism. No word yet on how he plans to blame Obama for this too
 
(Some Bot)
 
 
 
[Geek] The Politics tab of tomorrow
source: antipope.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
George Clooney "completely agrees" that money should be kept out of politics, but only after a few of his friends come over one last time for 330 thousand dollar crab cakes
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Texas GOP to vote on secession from U.S. at state convention, rename Texas Chucknorristan
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Research finds that people obsessed with correcting grammar aren't as nice as other people. Wonder if they did nazi that coming
source: mashable.com
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Hillary Clinton steps with hot sauce in her bag, yo. At all times
source: thesource.com
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Pentagon assaulted those statistics on sex assault which it gave to Congress. Pentagon says it didn't happen, it wasn't that bad, and statistics probably wanted it
source: bigstory.ap.org
 
(Uni Watch)
 
 
 
[Sports] The Pirates try to bring some fun to baseball with bumblebee throwbacks. Bonus pics of the announcers going full Anchorman
source: uni-watch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
[Main] I'm not saying that it's raining hard right now in Houston, but several local ark-builders were seen visiting the Houston zoo today
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Daily News)
 
 
 
Job openings available for those that like 'em 'cold and stiff'
source: dailynews.com
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
[Politics] Good news for Republicans: Hillary Clinton is very beatable in the general election. Bad news for Republicans: Not by either Donald Trump or Ted Cruz
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
45% of Americans pay no federal income tax. Thanks, Obama
source: marketwatch.com
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
It's a bit tough to swallow when a guy making nearly $15,000 an hour angrily claims he cant POSSIBLY afford to pay his workers $15/hr
source: usatoday.com
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
How a Ponzi scheme used Flint homes to fleece $15M from realty investors. And this all happened before their water was poisoned with lead
source: mlive.com
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Migrants drown after boat capsizes. Well duh, it would be weird if they drowned before it capsized
source: bbc.com
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
"Well, that's one thing you didn't steal from us, colonialist bastards"
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
[Business] Google beats authors. ALL the authors
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
US sending more troops to Iraq. This is not a repeat of the last 20 times this has happened and will continue to happen for the next couple decades
source: bbc.com
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
[Politics] If you are school-supply vendor that is ripping off Detroit Public Schools in cahoots with its principals, maybe you might want to re-think having your 11,000 Sq ft mansion with indoor Olympic pool featured in the "Home Envy" section of the newspaper
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Asians upset over Scarlett Johansson being cast as a Japanese cyborg
source: msnbc.com
 
(US Herald)
 
 
 
If you're worried that 15 US states have an immigrant population of 15% or more, you should be downright petrified that the country as a whole has a roughly 98% immigrant population
source: usherald.com
 
(Myrtle Beach Online)
 
 
 
Real or fake, farting in bars can get you arrested
 
(AlterNet)
 
 
 
[Politics] How did our two party political system become so broken? I for one blame the uninspired animal logo branding
source: alternet.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
O-o
source: pennlive.com
 
(Politicus USA)
 
 
 
[Main] Clinton and Sanders think we should be able to sue Saudi Arabia for 9/11. Why not throw in Boeing, United Airlines and every president from 1972 onward?
source: politicususa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
[FarkUs] Harrisburg, Pennsylvania is having a "Name the Swans" contest for a lake that is there. Let's give them our best suggestions
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Why Better Call Saul is better than Breaking Bad
source: slate.com
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Virgin Islands Republican Committee meeting erupts into chaos. Sounds like (•_•) / ( •_•)⌐■-■ / (⌐■_■) trouble in paradise
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Women falls asleep in the mall and gets photoshopped into infamy
 
(Fansided)
 
 
 
The NBA playoffs kick off - skinny Kevin Love faring better than skinny Kyle Lowry, who are both outpacing fat James Harden
source: fansided.com
 
(Politico (Europe))
 
 
 
Sorry, Ted Cruz, but Muslim terrorists don't actually spend much time at their local mosques
source: politico.eu
 
(Fansided)
 
 
 
Jared Goff must have fumbled a lot under pressure and been accused of domestic assault at his Cowboys workout, beacsue Jerry Jones can't stop raving about him
source: fansided.com
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Well at least you don't have to worry about that awkward Prom Night Dumpster Baby
source: wtop.com
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Trump nicknames Clinton "Crooked Hillary" and so of course FoxNews thinks that this means that Hillary now has to prove she's not crooked. o_0
source: rawstory.com
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
[Geek] Artificial intelligence could be taught how to deal with awkward silences in conversation. The potential for hilarity is endless
source: thestack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
The Coast Guard says their computer systems need a significant overhaul. In other news, the Coast Guard has computers
source: thestack.com
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Sanders attempts to unskew the polls ahead of his NY primary loss
source: politico.com
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
[Politics] Gov. Rick Snyder lives in a condo in Ann Arbor and city residents have been expressing their appreciation of this fact
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Bulldozer Fight
source: torontosun.com
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
Cycling: The Movie...coming soon in IMAX. Subby not convinced this will be as good as The Dark Knight
source: thestack.com
 
(Cal Coast News)
 
 
 
Motocross video sparks CHP investigation, how did he do it?
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 01:00 PM
(Newser)
 
 
 
Woman leaves 13 month old in car alone with the windows rolled up so she could audition. How committed are YOU to the arts?
source: newser.com
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
[Politics] Somebody fetch me my $27 fainting goats, which are actually more like $28 or $29. Oh the humanity of it all
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
Upcoming handheld device will let people speak Firefly. Shiny. Oh, wait, not the Joss Whedon show. Hopes cancelled once again
source: thestack.com
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
[Main] What is the RDA of rare megamouth shark?
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Suicide bomber blows up bus in Israel; Israeli police unsure of the identity of the bomber, say they are trying to put the pieces together
source: hosted.ap.org
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
If you're a FedEx hub worker inTennessee who's trying to sneak in a few quick z's while on the clock, be sure you're not sneaking them on the transport plane that's about to take off for Texas
source: foxnews.com
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
[Business] What's the difference between Costco and Sam's Club? According to Consumer Reports, not much at all, except Costco sells some better quality stuff that you didn't need in the first place
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
And this is just one vendor
source: freep.com
 
(Eugene Register-Guard)
 
 
 
University of Oregon shocked to learn frat and sorority members drink themselves into a stupor in order to gain social status. Also appalled that someone other than the university is covering up sexual assaults to maintain their reputation
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
[Main] Jerusalem bus blast wounds 16, mayor blames bomb, You just know there was a character limit for this headline
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
"Hey, anyone know where this galaxy came from?" "Yes, we came from the Big Bang." "No no no, I meant THAT galaxy"
source: gizmodo.com
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
ISIS and Wahhabisim. We Report - You Decide
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
How to recognize hipster eateries that serve obnoxiously overpriced artisanal breakfast. "You know your area is on the way up when your neighbours develop an overwhelming desire to spend too much money on croissants and sourdough"
source: theguardian.com
 
(NewsMax)
 
 
 
Obama refusing to leave Washington after his term ends
source: newsmax.com
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
[Sports] No, Pistons, you're never going to get calls on LeBron's patented forearm shove
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
[Business] "What exactly does your company do?" "We are very successful and well-connected, and make a positive global impact" *throws smoke bomb*
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
China unveils robot goddess, the most realistic robot EVER if you know what I mean. "We will add facial expression recognition and make it interact more deeply with people"
source: dailymail.co.uk
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
The Pentagon has missled Congress... *reads again* Strike that. Misled. The Pentagon has misled Congress. Never mind
source: bigstory.ap.org
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
[Politics] Humble towheaded spokesman for President Putin declares income, explains his massive take-home pay -- four times bigger than his boss's -- as just salary, "and sadly I got an inheritance when my father died"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
[Main] Stadium groundskeeper pro-tip: If there is a family event scheduled to be held on the field, make sure that the automatic sprinkler system is shut off for that evening
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Man documenting his struggle with Alzheimer's: "I thought I was opening the toilet door- it was the plane's emergency exit"
source: thestar.com
 
(Yakima Herald Republic)
 
 
 
Fire up the Quattro Hunting with your car is now legal in Washington State
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Dumpster fire. New hotness: Junkyard fire
 
(Co.Exist)
 
 
 
Tired of almond milk? This new protein drink is full of peaness
source: fastcoexist.com
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
[Main] Palestinians: Israel is planning on taking over the Temple Mount | Jordan: How about we install cameras to monitor the activy on the Mount | Palestinians: including ours? | Jordan: Yes Palestinians: NO CAMERAS
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Donald Rumsfeld (R) says due to his age of 83 he is losing hope that he'll live to see a flat tax. Subby loses hope that he will live to see Donald Rumsfeld in front of the ICC for violation of the Geneva Conventions
source: gawker.com
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
Local Cameroonian boy gets up-close, personal look at UN Ambassador Samantha Power's motorcade
source: bigstory.ap.org
 
(Fortune)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Supersizing your food. New Hotness: All-You-Can-Eat McDonalds Fries
source: fortune.com
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
[Main] UN ambassador's motorcade on way to meet Cameroon children succeeds
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dumbass Daily)
 
 
 
Wisconsin high school teacher arrested for sex with a student, including on the night of her husband's bachelor's party
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Abandoned ugly-ass hermaphrodite kitten has male and female genitalia, can fark itself when it grows up
source: bbc.co.uk
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Super-gonorrhea is spreading across Britain and may soon be untreatable. And if that's not enough to make you freak out, the nightmare-inducing photo will do the job
source: telegraph.co.uk
 
(Dumbass Daily)
 
Boobies
 
Hot Middle school teacher sends nudes to her minor student
 
(Dumbass Daily)
 
 
 
Man breaks girlfriends nose when she says no to sex
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
ISS successfully upgraded with bouncy house
source: abcnews.go.com
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Theranos devastated over regulator findings, vows to "rebuild this entire laboratory from scratch" as soon as they find the rest of the Infinity Stones
source: cnbc.com
 
(Russia Today)
 
 
 
On eve of primary, New York voters file lawsuit attempting to ban the entire primary process
source: rt.com
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"It's time to stop playing at pseudo-democracy, following pseudo-liberal values." Points for honesty, I guess
source: yahoo.com
 
(Hypable)
 
 
 
Stephen King and William Shatner debate human morality and CW's The 100
source: hypable.com
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
New Disney execs are sticklers for cutting costs and increasing margins, especially by ratcheting up fees at theme parks. "This combination of surge pricing, after-hours parties, preferred parking -- this is not how Disney typically does business"
source: bloomberg.com
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 12:00 PM
(Adelaide Now)
 
 
 
Chef Moran and Singapore Airlines unveil new "feel-good airline food." Business class gets citrus steamed bass fillet, sousvide miso simmered beef and tofu cheesecake with citrus compote, coach gets quinoa served with ratatouille and chickpeas
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
A revolution's on its way, and I can promise that \ if you do just what I say, I'll put us on the map
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Posting an image of a Russian youtuber, a kebab shop, Ian Curtis, a Chinese flag, a Russian flag & an Anime character with a Nazi armband on your blog. You bet the Russian police want to speak to you. Honestly. A kebab shop?
source: bbc.com
 
(KBKW Grays Harbor)
 
 
 
Registered Sex Offender Requests Polygraph To Clear His Name. "Fails" icon is never more appropriate
source: kbkw.com
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
"She was full of life" father says about four year old daughter. Father responsible for the past tense
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Kawhi Leonard wins the NBA Defensive Player of the Year Award
source: examiner.com
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Drop the Dead Donkey
source: theguardian.com
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Starvation, running from predators, once again trump good 'ol American performance enhancers
source: cnn.com
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Treasury decides that, on second thought, the "Ten Dollar Founding Father" should remain, and the asshole who tried to destroy the US' banking system is the one who should get the boot off the twenty
source: yahoo.com
 
(Facebook)
 
 
 
[Video] Keanu Reeves: Great man? Or greatest man?
source: facebook.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Last dildo continues to post Youtube videos
 
(CosmosUp)
 
 
 
[Geek] In the coming years, we will find more and more Earth-like planets, but for now, here's a look at the world most like our home ever. Meet GJ 832d
source: cosmosup.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Caller)
 
 
 
Right wind outrage du jour: How dare a politician get excited about learning something new
source: dailycaller.com
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
[Business] For the love of God, someone please tell Steve Case that AOL is not cool again
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Cold fusion, perpetual motion, and free energy are among the topics not discussed in this article about an inverse spin Hall effect
source: phys.org
 
(The Daily Californian)
 
 
 
Guy thrown off Southwest flight because... a fellow passenger heard him speaking Arabic on the phone
source: dailycal.org
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
[Geek] Getting lucky is in your genetics
source: in.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KQED San Francisco)
 
 
 
Thanks to crowdsourcing apps, in the near future you'll be able to get a warning on your phone right before the big earthquake shakes your building down on you
source: ww2.kqed.org
 
(Right Wing Watch)
 
 
 
[Politics] According to Ann Coulter, cheating on your wife is OK as long as you do it in church. Subby must have missed that part in the Bible
source: rightwingwatch.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
ISIS steals new execution technique from pizza delivery driver murder. C'mon, ISIS, where is your originality? North Korea is still coming up with original ways to kill. Get with it, or lose your "Most Evil" status
source: mirror.co.uk
 
(Fox5 DC)
 
 
 
Out of the restraints, through the ambo doors, across five lanes of traffic...nothing but dead
source: fox5dc.com
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Scientists confirm that they're now able to create an entire race of space mice. Just in case we ever need space mice for anything
source: news.sky.com
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Google wins copyright battle with Authors Guild, because, fark you
source: bbc.com
 
(Jerusalem Post)
 
 
 
Hillary and Donald, A family feud?
source: jpost.com
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Living Ken Doll hospitalized after his body rejected his latest nose job. Doctors are not worried about a similar reaction when they remodel his junk
 
(Medical Xpress)
 
 
 
Virgenes?
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
John Kasich has some advice for LGBT people who are subject to discrimination: ""If you feel as though somebody is doing something wrong against you, can you just, for a second, get over it, you know, because this thing will settle down,"
source: yahoo.com
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Hey I just meet you, and this is crazy, but here's my number, don't call me
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Frogger: Ambulance level
source: foxnews.com
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
What do Bernie supporters have in common with Trump's children?
 
(Times Argus)
 
 
 
Pleading neither innocence or guilt, Malheur Wildlife Refuge occupiers cite their right to "Life, liberty and the pursuit of dildos"
source: timesargus.com
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
After getting nearly $1 billion it didn't ask for, U.S. Coast Guard considers a move from Windows XP
source: thestack.com
 
(Wonkette)
 
 
 
Obnoxious: 5 year-olds. Insufferable: Vegetarians. Behold, the 5-year-old vegetarian
source: wonkette.com
 
(Investors Business Daily)
 
 
 
Oil producers to face crude reality as talks fail to curtail production, with additional comments by spokesman Homer Simpson - D'oha
source: investors.com
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Tax day: 45% of Americans pay not Federal income tax. Yes, we know they pay other taxes...just like the 55% who pay Federal income tax ALSO pay those other taxes too
source: marketwatch.com
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Consider this an eviction
source: local10.com
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
[Entertainment] 'Game of Thrones' Lena Headey explains why she didn't get naked for the Walk of Shame, hits back at pervs who can't figure out how to simply freeze-frame '300'
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wonkette)
 
 
 
Wonkette: Salon is just the worst
source: wonkette.com
 
(CNN)
 
NewsFlash
 
Terrorist explosion on Jerusalem bus injures 15...or something
source: cnn.com
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Barefoot Bandit has mommy issues
source: foxnews.com
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
[Main] Monica Lewinsky says "the shame sticks to you like tar." Are we not doing phrasing anymore?
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Adweek)
 
 
 
Well, according to the weather billboard, the balls are hanging low and swinging left, so it's apparently a warm day with a breeze to the southwest
source: adweek.com
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"RRS Boaty McBoatface" for the WIN
source: cnn.com
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 11:00 AM
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Americans send 200 more troops to Iraq to join the other 3,900 troops who aren't there anymore. Soldiers presumably will not be issued boots, to keep them from touching the ground
source: bbc.com
 
(First Things)
 
 
 
"When a formerly ascetic discipline suddenly attains a measure of influence, it is bound to be flooded by opportunists and charlatans." I'm looking at you, National Academy of Science
source: firstthings.com
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
FOTY literally breaks his daughter's heart
source: dailymail.co.uk
 
(WHIO Dayton)
 
 
 
Tetsuo❕ Kaneda❕ Aaakkkiiiiiiiraaaaaa❕
source: whio.com
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
[Main] Suicide at golf course leaves hole in one, the problem with littoral lube failure, and being shot at by a man with a gnu: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 4/10 - 4/16
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
24
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Forensic pathologists have cured every disease. We thank them for their undetermined work
source: slate.com
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Dr. pimple popper pops a zit, ruins your breakfast
source: dailymail.co.uk
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
[Geek] Millions of bees live on hotel roofs in San Francisco. Obvious tag says well duh, there's no way they could afford an apartment there
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minn Post)
 
 
 
Radical Muslim calls for an ... increase in funding for the TSA?
source: minnpost.com
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
[FarkUs] Oh, look, Houston is flooding again
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
Sulky Coast Guards want cooler toys
source: thestack.com
 
(Dark Reading)
 
 
 
MIT's CSAIL lab now testing artificial intelligence for detecting IT security threats. "The platform was able to detect 85% of attacks, three times better than previous benchmark, while at the same time reducing false positives by a factor of five"
source: darkreading.com
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Author thinks parties are equal cause reasons. False equivalency all over the place in this article. Republicans bad mean Democrats bad. All equal. Why is author a caveman idiot?
source: salon.com
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Trump's new top campaign aide Paul Manafort is a long-time Washington lobbyist whose clients have included Ferdinand Marcos, Vladimir Putin, Mobuto Sese Seko, and the Pakistani Intelligence Service, so he feels right at home working with Trump
source: yahoo.com
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Hold my beer and watch this: 360° Formula One edition
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"When it comes to religious liberty, religious liberty is something that protects all of us; it applies to Christians, it applies to Jews, it applies to Muslims, it applies to atheists," says noted defender of not using religion, Ted Cruz (R-Canada)
source: gma.yahoo.com
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Bienvenidos compañeros marineros a la Florida, nuestra tierra de los loco. Buena fortuna de tu journey to Baltimore, nuestra tierra de asesinatos
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
[Politics] Tiny-dicked Trump painting generates death threats from someone in a tall building in Chicago
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Grandson of rich Russian oligarch proves people will do anything for money. Didn't we already know that?
source: dailymail.co.uk
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Fatties can now go be fat somewhere else ...like at this restaurant that serves them for free
source: shanghaiist.com
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Crushing your wife's head and flushing it down the toilet is one way to win your arguments. Not recommended
source: dailymail.co.uk
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
[Main] Smoking 20 joints a day could lead you to believe you are covered in parasites
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
NewsFlash
 
Bus explosion in Jerusalem injures at least 10
source: cnn.com
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Florida teen's science project catches President Obama's attention, possibly saving it from Groundskeeper Willie's attention
source: wfla.com
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Silly: eBay user tries to auction off bag of air from Kobe Bryant's last game. Fark: Bids reach $15,000
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Berlin Police called in to break up a vegan party after reports of attendees misusing their superpowers
source: bbc.com
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Illinois comptroller says that due to the long -running budget impasse between the governor and the legislature, the state is out of money and lawmakers can't be paid. In other news the budget impasse is expected to be resolved by nightfall
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
[Business] In Holland, after 2025, you will only be able to drive an electric car. Oil companies threaten to stop wearing wooden shoes
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Schools all over Texas are forced to close as some sort of strange, liquid form of snow blankets the state
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
[Politics] Bill Clinton warns that Bernie Brahs will 'shoot every third person on Wall Street' instead of dealing with the situation discreetly, like Vince Foster
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Bethesda's open beta of Doom goes over as well as David Duke at an NAACP meeting
source: n3rdabl3.co.uk
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
Scientists build 'unsupervised' threat detection system that needs adult supervision
source: thestack.com
 
(WBUR Boston)
 
 
 
Next on National Geographic: WHEN DEMOCRATS ATTACK...each other
 
(Awful Announcing)
 
 
 
[Sports] Kathryn Tappen becomes hockey fans' new hero for the third-degree burn she drops on Mike Milbury live on TV
source: awfulannouncing.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vulture)
 
 
 
Goodbye James Cameron, you will be missed
source: vulture.com
 
(The New Orleans Advocate)
 
 
 
Any rap videos you make can and will be used against you in a court of law
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Sarah Palin: Fox doesn't check it's sources, being a conservative this only now bothers her now that it effects her
source: inquisitr.com
 
(Ynet)
 
NewsFlash
 
Bus hit in suspected terror attack in Jerusalem, at least 15 injured
source: ynetnews.com
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
French 'fish soup pizza' beats Italy for best pizza in Pizza World Championships. I dunno, something seems fishy about that to me
source: thelocal.fr
 
(Natural News)
 
 
 
Now here's a study Farkers can get behind
source: naturalnews.com
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Homeland Security urges Windows users to Uninstall Quick Time. Dozens scramble to comply
source: foxnews.com
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
[Business] Branding elements for new marijuana businesses are stereotypical and overused, leading to confusion in the marketplace. As opposed to marijuana itself, which just leads to confusion in its users
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 18, 2016, 10:00 AM
(MSN)
 
 
 
[Entertainment] Johnny Depp apologizes for hiding wiener down under. Ironically, reporter fails to apologize for misusing Ironic in article
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Are you an independent voter or a member of the independent party? The difference could get you locked out of the California primary
source: latimes.com
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Torn from the front page of the Bangor Daily News: POOP THREAD
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Tough penalties for those who don't scoop their dog's poop. Even tougher if you don't scoop your own
source: thelocal.es
 
(North Jersey)
 
 
 
One of the nice things you can look forward to as a five-star football recruit is racist voice mails from college football fans
source: northjersey.com
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
[Politics] Monday Interlude: Danny MacAskill
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
[Main] Man SHOCKED to discover his new facial tattoo has directly affected his job
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charlotte Observer)
 
 
 
Passenger, airline crew, police, and FBI freak out about a guy speaking Arabic on a plane. Feel safer yet?
 
(Medium)
 
 
 
"On Becoming Anti-Bernie." Long but very worth reading, although good luck getting any Bernie Sanders supporters to actually research anything
source: medium.com
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
You got your terrible policing in my guns on campus thread. No, you got your guns in my terrible policing thread. (Two Fark tastes that click-bait together.)
source: al.com