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Headlines matching 'victims'
Fri February 10, 2012
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(The Chronicle Herald) Scary 1.7M coffee makers recalled after users were reportedly sprayed with hot water. On the bright side, victims felt more awake than they would have had they actually drank the coffee  (thechronicleherald.ca) (46)


Thu January 26, 2012
(Sun Sentinel) Florida After you've been busted for injecting Super Glue into women's butts, the next logical career move is to get attacked on-stage by the victims' parents during a taping of a trashy TV show  (sun-sentinel.com) (50)
(WGAL 8) Hero Three juveniles knock 65-year-old man off bike, try to rob him. Would-be victim obligingly offers them all the bullets he has  (wgal.com) (196)


Tue January 24, 2012
(Think Progress) Asinine Santorum says that pregnant rape victims should realize that they have "a gift in a very broken way, the gift of human life, and accept what God has given to you"  (thinkprogress.org) (454)


Sat January 21, 2012
(BBC) Sad 120 dead after Kano blasts. Suspected victims include Scorpion, Johnny Cage  (bbc.co.uk) (66)


Thu January 19, 2012
(Think Progress) Followup Rush Limbaugh on the sanctity of marriage: "At least he asked his wife for permission instead of cheating on her. That's a mark of character, in my book. Newt's a victim"  (thinkprogress.org) (187)
(Minneapolis Star Tribune) Interesting Obamacare claims another victim, as United Health Group profits are up 21%  (startribune.com) (68)
(Yahoo) Followup Carnival Cruises, the parent company to Costa, will offer the victims of the sunken liner a $500 voucher, $100 onboard credit for a future cruise and a complimentary "How To Make a Towel Animal" booklet  (news.yahoo.com) (43)


Wed January 18, 2012
(Cambridge News) Amusing Youth steals laptop. Owner chases youth, catches youth, retrieves laptop then delivers a masterclass in the ancient art of Rubbing It In  (cambridge-news.co.uk) (21)


Tue January 17, 2012
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida Drunk driver who killed 2 people on Christmas 2007 has a moment of Florida clarity and decides to sue them  (tampabay.com) (239)


Fri January 13, 2012
(NYPost) Followup Target shopping cart victim was just "mostly dead"  (nypost.com) (64)


Wed January 11, 2012
(Fox News) Scary Has the Mayan Apocalypse claimed its first victims?  (foxnews.com) (66)


Fri January 06, 2012
(Paste Magazine) Interesting Good news: "Community" has not been canceled. Bad news: The fourth season could still fall victim to Evil Troy and Evil Abed  (pastemagazine.com) (99)


Wed January 04, 2012
(New York Daily News) Followup Number of victims of butt-injection 'doctor' inflates to 30  (nydailynews.com) (81)


Tue January 03, 2012
(Naples Daily News) Florida Attention all school bullies. Your victims can now legally take you out with deadly force  (naplesnews.com) (973)


Mon January 02, 2012
(The Sun) Spiffy Woman who was bullied over acne and flat chest crowned UK's top pole dancer (w/pic)  (thesun.co.uk) (128)


Sat December 31, 2011
(Some Guy) Misc Mike Munchak's "heart is torn" over Penn State head coaching opportunity. Sandusky's victims say they're a bit torn up, too   (collegefootballtalk.nbcsports.com) (12)


Fri December 23, 2011
(NYPost) Strange NYC subway vigilante Bernard Goetz gets his sweet revenge... well sort of  (nypost.com) (149)


Tue December 20, 2011
(German Herald) Interesting New laboratory is growing human skin from foreskins collected from infants. It's safe, completely natural and the only side effect is that when burn victims see pretty women, they stand up straighter  (germanherald.com) (120)


Thu December 08, 2011
(Some Guy) Sad World's slowest bullet finally claims its victim  (wbaltv.com) (59)


Mon December 05, 2011
(Gawker) Interesting "American Psycho" author feels terrible about bullying victims and wonders what can be done. Just kidding, he wants them to stop whining and man up: "You lose. Deal with it"  (gawker.com) (270)


Fri December 02, 2011
(Some Guy) Dumbass Woman on cocktail of prescription drugs plows through yard and injures man on riding mower (you'd hit it like you were pilled out behind the wheel mugshot)  (limerick.patch.com) (51)


Thu December 01, 2011
(The New York Times) Cool In addition to making you send unremembered, early morning, sexually charged emails to your boss, Ambien also can wake brain injury victims from a persistent vegetative state  (nytimes.com) (147)
(wcti12.com) Hero Man rescues crash victim moments before a Michael Bay movie takes place  (wcti12.com) (12)
(Austin News KXAN) Strange "Police said when they arrived, they found the alleged victim covered in grease and macaroni"  (kxan.com) (35)


Wed November 30, 2011
(Denver Channel) Obvious Soldier getting robbed on a walk pulls out his own gun  (thedenverchannel.com) (109)


Tue November 29, 2011
(Some Reporter) Interesting News: Reporter finds that most people who investigate foreclosures get scammed. Fark: Including said reporter  (poynter.org) (24)


Fri November 25, 2011
(FOX6Now) Fail Man sends disk with child porn on it to a news station in an attempt to frame his landlord. The end result didn't turn out as he expected  (fox6now.com) (28)


Thu November 24, 2011
(National Post) Asinine Teen burglar's apology letter to victims may be even greater trolling attempt than this headline, the U.S. Constitution  (news.nationalpost.com) (149)


Wed November 23, 2011
(PennLive) Sick New York Times protects Sandusky victim by not printing his name. Instead, they print his parents' names, neighbors' names, address, school district, graduating year, hobbies, employer, and what types of socks he likes to wear  (pennlive.com) (68)


Thu November 17, 2011
(Daily Mail) Dumbass Woman steals a $1,400 handbag from her neighbor, then tries to sell it back to her, which is totes stupid  (dailymail.co.uk) (28)


Tue November 15, 2011
(Talking Points Memo) Silly Latest victim to have to rebuff advances by an over-eager Herman Cain: Kissinger   (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com) (43)


Sun November 13, 2011
(New York Daily News) Strange Couple has received over 150 prank 911 calls in the past two years. Don't worry though, the fact that they're Muslim in a predominantly non-Muslim area has nothing to do with it  (nydailynews.com) (128)


Thu November 10, 2011
(Some Guy) Scary Civil suits against Penn State could reach over 15% of the school's total endowment  (businessinsider.com) (338)
(Gawker) Stupid When people are laughing at you for NOT dressing up like a pimp, you know you might have a credibility problem  (gawker.com) (62)
(MSNBC) Dumbass Even in Texas, you're not allowed to attack random people who happen to drive past your house if it has been broken into  (msnbc.msn.com) (33)


Tue November 08, 2011
(News.com.au) Sad Colombia mudslide toll climbs to 39 victims, 25 gallons of vodka  (news.com.au) (16)


Thu November 03, 2011
(Some Overzealous Cleaner) Dumbass Cleaning tip: Before cleaning up a puddle on a museum floor, make sure it isn't a $1.1 million art installation   (acn.liveauctioneers.com) (237)
(Some Guy) Interesting New GPS device alerts domestic violence victims that it's time to start making some damn sandwiches again  (newyork.cbslocal.com) (45)


Wed November 02, 2011
(Some Guy) Fail Not News: Peeping tom caught in the act. News: All occupants of victims' house give chase. Fark: Victims are town council members holding an illegal meeting  (wcnc.com) (48)


Tue November 01, 2011
(Some Guy) Scary Victim in DUI crash with Seattle Police Officer amazed he's still alive, glad officer was too drunk to find his gun  (kirotv.com) (122)
(SLTrib) Strange This crazy bastard shot his neighbor for "telepathically raping" his wife. And with a mugshot like that, I think I believe him  (sltrib.com) (120)


Wed October 26, 2011
(Yahoo) Interesting For decades, the man's family thought he was one of John Wayne Gacy's victims. Today, the family was saddened to learn that he had actually been living in Florida the whole time  (news.yahoo.com) (68)


Sun October 16, 2011
(Chicago Sun-Times) Sappy Not news: Memorial dedicated for victims of 1979 plane crash. News: A class of 6th graders made it happen. Fark: American Airlines wrote them a letter telling them to "let it go"  (suntimes.com) (44)


Sat October 15, 2011
(Some Guy) Asinine Man: "My ex-wife is stalking me." Judge: "LOL, you pussy." Wife: *BLAM BLAM BLAM*  (missoulian.com) (137)

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