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264 headlines found matching 'tom'
Fri April 29, 2016
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(NHL)
 
 
 
The West side of the second round starts tonight with the Blues in Dallas in the late game and then Sharks host the Preds in the really late game. Hey you can sleep in tomorrow... 8:00 & 10:30ET
source: nhl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Supporters of grassroots semipro soccer club Detroit City FC perturbed that billionaires Dan Gilbert and Tom Gores can just get MLS franchise for Detroit without reaching out to them or slipping them some sugar
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Russian jet fighter pays back the US for Tom Cruise's "Top Gun" fiasco, does barrel roll over US reconnaissance plane
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
And the role of Lara Croft in the Tomb Raider reboot goes to...no one you've ever heard of
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 28, 2016
(Comic Book Resources)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, the team travels to 2166 a time which Rip believes is their last shot at stopping Vandal Savage. (CW 8ET)
source: comicbookresources.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(University of Washington)
 
 
 
Babies learn language skills faster by listening to music. As long as it's not Ozzy Osbourne, Tom Petty or Bob Dylan
source: washington.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Airbus 1Q profit falls 50% after undelivered planes cause customer turbulence
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tomato
source: pre13.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed April 27, 2016
(NPR)
 
 
 
Kentucky schools are delighted to have done what no other school system has achieved: "bring itself up from the very bottom of the barrel in education rankings to the middle of the pack"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Seattle Times finds a lot to talk about in this FARK headline: "Court of Appeals saves Boston-area sports radio for the next five months by reinstating Tom Brady's DeflateGate suspension"
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Spirit airlines improved 15% on the customer satisfaction index this year. Still ranks dead last
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 26, 2016
(Quartz)
 
 
 
Google patents self-flying drone delivery mechanism that sounds kind of kinky: "hovering above its delivery target, and slowly lowering packages through a tether" and calling out to the customer that it's coming and watch out
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Chipotle now luring customers back with free burritos that don't make them sick
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
The greatest ever Top Gear car? The Bugatti Veyron? No. The Ferrari TheFerrari? Nope. The Ariel Atom? Not a chance. The Dacia Sandero? Ooh, close, but no
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Self-described Catholic "church militant" posted a new video in which he thanks God for giving his mother stomach cancer and dying so that he would be brought back to the Catholic Church that also "cured" him of his homosexuality
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Meanwhile in Britain... "Could have been worse, officer. It could have dropped down from the sky in a bizarre piece of animation and stomped you flat. Just be glad it's a car. This time"
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The internet is hunting down this jackass who stomped a street vendor's buns and ruined her stall
source: au.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 25, 2016
(Nikkei Asia Review)
 
 
 
Japanese theme park to introduce full-blown "robot kingdom" of 200 automatons, letting guests experience life in a world of service robots devoted to your convenience and pleasure. Didn't we see this movie?
source: asia.nikkei.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Weather Channel)
 
 
 
If you want to do some storm chasing, you may want to head to Tornado Alley tomorrow
source: weather.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Not news: Bryce Harper homers. News: Bryce Harper homers in the bottom of the 9th to tie the game. Fark: On his day off
source: espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SB Nation)
 
 
 
Court of Appeals saves Boston-area sports radio for the next five months by reinstating Tom Brady's DeflateGate suspension
source: sbnation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Former Reagan/GHWB Official: "Trump is a symptom of a disease of rampant stupidity, pandering to morons and bigots and racists and all the sort of stuff that defines today's Republican coalition"
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat April 23, 2016
(Death and Taxes Magazine)
 
 
 
Tom DeLay: But think of all the good things Dennis Hastert did when he wasn't molesting children
source: deathandtaxesmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
All-day breakfast at McDonald's? Customers are lovin' it
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KUTV Utah)
 
 
 
A cat found living in a couch that was sent to a thrift store has now been reunited with her human. She now prefers to snooze on top of the ottoman on Caturday
source: kutv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 22, 2016
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Everybody ready for water-buckey-balloon fights? Chemists make smallest water balloon possible, 70 carbon atoms and one molecule of water
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
British Telecom snafu sends every one of their customer's emails to one dude for three hours
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Apparently you can hit a deer and still pass your driving test in the U.K., as long as you have a good game plan
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 21, 2016
(TV Guide)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, To thwart the Pilgrim, Rip has the rest of the team kidnap their younger selves. This will all end in tears (CW 8ET)
source: tvguide.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Alaska Dispatch News)
 
 
 
When real life resembles a Tom Clancy novel: Russian attack submarines are prowling the coastlines of Scandinavia, Scotland, the Mediterranean Sea and the North Atlantic in numbers we haven't seen in two decades
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed April 20, 2016
(Federal News Radio)
 
 
 
Hey, did you notice how much the IRS improved its customer service this year? No? All right then
source: federalnewsradio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 19, 2016
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
United Healthcare drastically reducing their participation in Obamacare due to customer demand for their services
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Coca-Cola cans and bottles getting a "major" makeover, because if there's one thing Coke has learned about its customers over the years, it's that they love big changes
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 18, 2016
(Some Bot)
 
 
 
The Politics tab of tomorrow
source: antipope.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Stadium groundskeeper pro-tip: If there is a family event scheduled to be held on the field, make sure that the automatic sprinkler system is shut off for that evening
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Neatorama)
 
 
 
The sad, sordid history of the salad bar: its origins, rise, fall, and possible resurrection. Bottom line: you don't win friends with salad
source: neatorama.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 14, 2016
(TVLine)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, Rip Hunter needs the help of an old friend to escape a sticky situation. (CW 8ET)
source: tvline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
College professor: Okay students, in order to get you ready for the horrors in life you will now commence to drink Baijiu for your exam. Bottoms up
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Journal News)
 
 
 
Today's installment of "oh, THAT media bias": a) Corruption bust b) No party affiliation mentioned c) Must be a Democrat. Tomorrow's version will replace "corruption" with "rest area cruising" and "Democrat" with "Republican"
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 12, 2016
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Automakers beg the Feds not to be hasty and create a botched set of rules for autonomous cars Instead, take your time and really fark it up right
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mad Magazine)
 
 
 
The usual gang of idiots loses yet another member. Mad magazine's Lenny Brenner goes off to the tomato smashing kitchen in the sky
source: madmagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 11, 2016
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Aqib Talib doesn't see why Denver Broncos can't repeat. After all, they won with a bottom-tier quarterback last time
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
She was all he'd ever want, she's the kind he'd like to flaunt and take to dinner, but now Tom Jones' lady has passed away. F Cancer/2016
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun April 10, 2016
(Courier Mail)
 
 
 
Apparently opening a Vietnamese restaurant and calling it Uncle Ho might upset a few potential customers
source: couriermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
KFC looks around, sees that their customers have flown the coop to Chick-fil-A
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat April 09, 2016
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Tomorrow, a Boston Globe special edition will be set one year in the future and show the reality of a Donald Trump presidency
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
This is what it's like to live with a hoarder: "Hoarding seems like a logical symptom to appear in a world sick from consumer capitalism. I could deal with it. I was wrong"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Starbucks barista offends customer with accurate prediction
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Showrunner talks about main character's shocking death in season finale. No, not that show, that show. Wait, that show was still on?
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 07, 2016
(CBS Boston)
 
 
 
Tom Brady has moved past deflating balls to tripping balls. Prince Adam is inconsolable
source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Den of Geek (US))
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, the team travels to the future to neutralize an ally of Vandal Savage while he's still a young boy. Rip argues that the act is for the greater good. (CW 8ET)
source: denofgeek.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
In keeping with custom, Gregg Allman's tour bus drives off the road
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Handy tip for travelers: In France, under a new law, it is no longer illegal to BE a prostitute, but it IS illegal for a customer to pay for one
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Convers8tion (Australia))
 
 
 
Major customer survey finds people hate voicemail and don't trust Siri
source: theconversation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed April 06, 2016
(SlashFilm)
 
 
 
Star Wars: Rogue One trailer to premiere tomorrow morning during a news talk show no one watches. Here's a teaser
source: slashfilm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 05, 2016
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Tom Brady's soft balls cause litigious father-daughter strife throughout New England
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
BLM activists launch "Fark your Flag" tour, where they go around to Trump and Clinton rallies, throw American flags on the ground, and stomp them. Yeah. That's gonna fix things
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Please note: when the sheer scale of your alcohol consumption prompts a customs investigation that's only overturned on appeal, you might have a drinking problem. Or you're a Fark mod, one of the two
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 04, 2016
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Disneyland Paris Clue: The Skeletal Bride, in the Phantom Manor, with the live electrical cable. Do I WIN?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Nordic banks: "We absolutely do not help certain customers with their illegal tax evasion." Oh crap, I shouldn't have said it was 'certain customers'. Oh crap, I definitely shouldn't have said it was illegal....eh, it's too cold today
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Woman has 720 condoms confiscated by Indonesian customs for being pornographic material, also for being wildly optimistic
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun April 03, 2016
(Screen Rant)
 
 
 
Speaking of critically savaged movies, here are the 12 worst movies that have received a 0% fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes
source: screenrant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 01, 2016
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
"Everything we see from a cloud of smoke to a solid rock takes that specific form because of the collective behaviour of the atoms that make up that object. However, how do atoms choose how to behave? And which choices do they have?"
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Massive incoming solar storm means your GPS might not work tomorrow
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
U.K. minimum wage increases to $10.35 today. Collapse of civilisation tomorrow
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 31, 2016
(Canton Repository)
 
 
 
Presumably with a calendar issue and thinking it was tomorrow, Jerry Jones called Browns owner Haslam one of the league's top five owners
source: cantonrep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
18 toothbrushes in one patient's stomach? Well, Oral B. (Some graphic pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TVLine)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, Ray, Sandra, and Sara are stranded in the 1950's, which is ironic considering that Rip Hunter has a time machine (CW 8ET)
source: tvline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Minor league hockey team holds unpopular 'customer data breach night'
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fortune)
 
 
 
McDonald's introduces new slogan, "The simpler the better." Although it's not specific whether they mean their food, their service or customers who don't bother to look into what eating does to their health
source: fortune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WNEP Scranton)
 
 
 
YUUUGE truck advertising Trump gets stuck on bridge. Supporters immediately start punching and pepper spraying bridge
source: wnep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Customer: "Hello, Viking River Cruises? My wife suddenly died, so I'll be traveling alone." Cruise company: "Thanks for telling us. That will be an $853 rebooking fee"
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 30, 2016
(Dealbreaker)
 
 
 
The Court-ordered monitor who is supposed to ensure HSBC is not laundering money..again..is just a wee bit suspicious of the loans it made to a company exporting mini-skirts to Iran, and the customer who used a garbage bag of cash to open an account
source: dealbreaker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Crunch)
 
 
 
From new cognitive services group, Microsoft unveils next-generation image-captioning bot that will inspect pic and automatically add a caption. What could possibly go wrong?
source: techcrunch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Dealer: Would you like to test drive the new Mercedes? Customer: Sure. I'll just give you this stolen car to hold as collateral
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 29, 2016
(PC Gamer)
 
 
 
Valve's refusal to perform Customer Service is finally catching up with them
source: pcgamer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Researchers performing necropsies on sperm whales washed up on the beach discover their stomachs contain fishing nets, car parts, plastic buckets, wooden puppet, crickets
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Gun shop owner is being credited with foiling a possible mass shooting by turning away a customer. "Just the look in his eye... there was something about him. I don't know. You really can't explain it. He was going to do something"
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Magnets: how do they work in my stomach?
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Inquirer)
 
 
 
[Windows 10 update notifications] were on display at the bottom of a locked filing cabinet stuck in a disused lavatory with a sign on the door saying beware of the leopard
source: theinquirer.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Major League Baseball)
 
 
 
David Ortiz's final Spring Training game ended with a custom golf cart driven by Luis Tiant and Jim Rice. Quite literally riding off into the sunset
source: mlb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Family members of a late WWII vet who documented atomic bomb tests in the desert are about ready to nuke the VA from orbit. "He was excited about getting his own chair, but unfortunately it didn't come until a couple months after he passed"
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon March 28, 2016
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Georgia Christians respond with customary rationality in the wake of their governor vetoing their latest "But God Wants Us To Be Bigots" legislation: "It's open season on people of faith in Georgia"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wonkette)
 
 
 
"I'd like a sausage and cheese omelette, no egg" - stories of staggeringly dumb restaurant customers
source: wonkette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
They are wearing hats and mittens in Hell this morning after a bank admitted it gave bad investment advice and refunded a customer's money
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun March 27, 2016
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
"Law enforcement investigators are broadening their DNA searches beyond government databases and demanding genetic information from companies that do ancestry research for their customers"
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox Sports)
 
 
 
You can now own one of 77 Bandit Edition Trans Am custom cars, signed by Burt Reynolds himself, for the starting price of $115,000. That's a hell of a lot of Coors
source: foxsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat March 26, 2016
(RBR)
 
 
 
Guy waits over eight years for his custom-built bicycle, which sucks, because when he ordered it he was told it would only take six
source: forums.roadbikereview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 24, 2016
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Woman mourning the recent death of her husband in an automobile accident gets the good news that she's pregnant, and the terrifying news that she'll have three more kids to remember him by
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Prague Post)
 
 
 
As the Easter weekend approaches, one of the hardest Czech customs to explain to people is the practice of whipping women on Easter Monday, which is called Red Monday
source: praguepost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Tomorrow is Good Friday, the day that ISIS traditionally crucifies a kidnapped priest
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Peter Brown, star of TV's "Lawman", "Laredo", and "Days of Our Lives" and castration victim of Pam Grier in "Foxy Brown", is dead at 80. That last bit won't go on his tombstone
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 23, 2016
(Lincoln Journal Star)
 
 
 
Nebraska legislator has a new idea for dealing with his anti-gay colleagues. "If I were a white man, I would get a semiautomatic weapon and mow everyone down"
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Here is a devastated family that wants to save football from itself, and they want Roger Goodell to be in the audience
source: espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Under Kansas' new "Spot a penis, win a prize" law Transgender people must use the restroom of their sex as "determined by..s chromosomes, and.. identified at birth by..anatomy", any one encountering a TG person in a school restroom is awarded $2,500
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Police find peeping tom under stairs, say he had wand in his hand, lightning bolt scar
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Isabella Cruise, Tom and Nicole's kid, got married and didn't invite her parents. Of course, everyone was fine with it
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 22, 2016
(The Federalist)
 
 
 
Trump supporter attempts to make America great again by writing long-winded article about being civil in politics again. Subby polishes a tomato
source: thefederalist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon March 21, 2016
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The Slurpee turned 50 last weekend, so let's see what kind of containers enterprising customers used on "bring your own cup day"... OH LAWD
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun March 20, 2016
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Peyton Manning wants to organize a 10-year Super Bowl reunion during the Bears-Colts game this upcoming season. Bears defenders Mike Brown and Tommie Harris have already said they will have to miss it
source: espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Minnesota)
 
 
 
Ammosexuals angry that they won't be allowed to get drunk, walk around with loaded fully automatic weapons and blow shiat up at government owned firing ranges anymore
source: minnesota.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British travel firm guarantees customers a Trump-free vacation while in the U.S.: "Guest can change hotels at no charge if they discover that Trump is staying there at the same time as them"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat March 19, 2016
(Fortune)
 
 
 
McDonald's hikes wages, and surprisingly the sky has not fallen. Instead, employee turnover is down and customer service is better
source: fortune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Want to live happily ever after? Marry a dentist, optometrist or podiatrist
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri March 18, 2016
(CNBC)
 
 
 
The "experts" at CNBC predict Sanders voters will become Trump voters if Hillary wins. Also, Cammy, from Street Fighter, is a real person and she'll be joining me for dinner tomorrow
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Motor Trend)
 
 
 
WWE legend Steve Austin still daily drives a 1995 Ford Bronco that he'll never sell. And that's the bottom line, 'CAUSE STONE COLD SAID SO
source: motortrend.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Dan Greaney, the writer for The Simpsons who wrote the episode where Lisa becomes president and attempts to erase the sins of president Trump, says it was "a warning to America; it just seemed like the logical last stop before hitting bottom"
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 17, 2016
(Myrtle Beach Online)
 
 
 
Sorry world, the bloody-looking box marked 'human remains' found in the Myrtle Beach area wasn't your Brad Pitt from 'Seven' moment. But it did have a tomato and an onion inside, if you're into that sort of thing
source: myrtlebeachonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Times)
 
 
 
The volume of tomato waste produced in Florida every year could power Disneyland for 90 days if it were turned into batteries
source: techtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Helicopters that flew special forces into some of the world's most deadly troublespots are being sold off as the world's most awesome garden sheds where you can deploy tactical tomatoes
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 16, 2016
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Most Walmart customers are ultimately harmless, but some do bite, so it is advisable to keep your distance as a precaution
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Tomato: Uncut
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 15, 2016
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Entire DC Metrorail system will be shut down all day tomorrow. Enjoy your commutes, DC Farkers
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
In what will surely go down as a scientific breakthrough on a par with splitting the atom and discovering gravity, scientists have worked out the physics of ribbon curling
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun March 13, 2016
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
After worker is convicted in child porn case, customers shun pizza place. Fark: The wrong pizza place
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat March 12, 2016
(CNN)
 
 
 
Bryan Adams doesn't care for customs officials of Egypt careless handling of his antique 1946 Martin guitar. In Egypt, writing on your crap with green magic marker is considered a blessing. OK, rock star?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri March 11, 2016
(Fark)
 
 
 
Hello, Peter. What's happening. Ahh, I'm gonna need you to go ahead and come in tomorrow, so if you could be here around 9, that would be great. Oh, and I almost forgot, if you could just take this quiz that would be great. Mkay?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 96.5 Florida)
 
 
 
Universal Orlando valet tries to take customer's Dodge Challenger Hellcat out for a spin but forgets one little thing
source: news965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Decor at a Joe's Crab Shack has customers real crabby
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
11 moments from last night for those of us who just can't stomach watching two brain-damaged cats, a robot cat and an old grumpy cat, knife fight in a dumpster fire as it careens off a cliff anymore
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 10, 2016
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The wife of the Turkish President, who is doing NOTHING to help dispel those rumors that he secretly wants to re-instate the Sultanate, says that the Ottoman Sultan's harems were "an educational establishment for preparing women for life"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Comic Book Resources)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, the team travels to the '50s to investigate a string of murders they think Savage is involved with. (CW 8ET)
source: comicbookresources.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Peyton Manning says one of the first calls he made about his retirement was to Tom Brady. Football fans are just glad it wasn't to Brett Favre
source: espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 09, 2016
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Iowa man fined for throwing tomatoes at Donald Trump, offered speaking slot at convention, unlimited ammo
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Fishermen off the coast of Newfoundland catch unknown creature tha--OH GOD, KILL IT, KILL IT WITH FIRE AND STOMP OUT THE ASHES
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 08, 2016
(UPI)
 
 
 
First tomatoes and peas harvested from mock Martian farm. Matt Damon to be introduced soon to grow poop potatoes
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Meet the Gaza Samson....well, without the hair and being Jewish, but still....they drop knives on his stomach as he exercises
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Need to lose weight? Just drill a hole in your stomach and pump the food out
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon March 07, 2016
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Cool: MIT developing scalable quantum computer based on five atoms. Scary: that could end RSA encryption. Quick, somebody hide these results from the FBI
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Greg Nicotero breaks down the chilling ending to "Not Tomorrow Yet," which starts with Carol baking cookies and ends with [SPOILERS]. Dammit, now I want cookies
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun March 06, 2016
(AP)
 
 
 
Hottest new genre is 'cli-fi', fiction about the effect of global warming. Notable books include Barbara Kingsolver's "Flight Behavior," Nathaniel Rich's "Odds Against Tomorrow," and anything by the UN's Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fortune)
 
 
 
Inventor of email and savior of the @ sign, Ray Tomlinson, is dead @ 74
source: fortune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live Science)
 
 
 
Amber-entombed lizards, dating back 99 million years, found in Myanmar. Dr Alan Grant ecstatic
source: livescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
"In the walls of King Tutankhamun's tomb could be the 'greatest antiquities discovery of all time'. There's just one problem - getting to it is almost impossible"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat March 05, 2016
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Like most people, Jennifer Lawrence cannot stomach the awful swill that is Miller High Life. Also, that's a nice itsy, bitsy, teenie, weenie, blue floral bikini
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
My alarm clock that syncs to the atomic clock is 7 minutes fast, and now says it's 2025. Is it safe to assume I overslept by 9 years and 7 minutes?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Why does Google Earth show a plane at the bottom of Lake Harriet? And why is CNN not covering this 24/7?
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 03, 2016
(Comic Book)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, When the team rescue a stranded time ship they run afoul of pirates. (CW 8ET)
source: comicbook.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action A Go-Go)
 
 
 
We present to you today's dose of video game graphics porn: Tom Clancy's The Division in 60 FPS (sfw)
source: actionagogo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KeysNet)
 
 
 
"Unsatisfied" strip-club customer threatens citizen arrest of stripper who wouldn't do the dirty. He's also a disbarred lawyer
source: keysnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Yes it's time for the tiny violins again: Now that she's studying abroad again this little princess misses her lifestyle because of what she's been accustomed to. Yes, billionaire problems
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 02, 2016
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Bernie is well past "Tis but a scratch" and "HAVE AT YOU", just zoomed past "Just a flesh wound", and will soon be issuing the customary "Right - I'll do you for that" statement
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LawFuel)
 
 
 
Today is [Facebook friend's] birthday. Reply to post a wish on her Timeline or reply with 1 to post 'Happy Birthday' or file a class action lawsuit for sending users unsolicited automated text messages
source: lawfuel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 01, 2016
(Politico)
 
 
 
Anticipating Super Tuesday humiliation, Team Rubio scrapes the bottom of the expectation-lowering barrel: "They said their convention strategy was not contingent on winning any states"
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
Apparently your fair use YouTube videos won't be automatically taken down every time a copyright holder sneezes. From now on Google is going to think about it. And then take them down
source: thestack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Back in my day watermelon was a lot more pale and had a lot more flesh and seeds, bananas looked more like okra, and tomatoes were called 'poisoned apples'
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 29, 2016
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Colorado Republican voters will have no say in the caucus tomorrow - the state GOP has eliminated the Presidential Poll and the decision goes straight to the Delegates. Demokracy
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
World's smallest robotic violin plays for Goldman Sachs employees soon to be automated out of their jobs
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun February 28, 2016
(Metro)
 
 
 
Parcel courier actually complies with customer's request. It's not news, it's Fark™
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Joe Biden to snarl traffic around Oscars tomorrow night as VP fulfills constitutional duty to introduce Lady Gaga
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat February 27, 2016
(Ottawa Citizen)
 
 
 
Yoko Ono hospitalized with flu-like symptoms. Initial tests suggest she may have been listening to Yoko Ono songs
source: ottawacitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 26, 2016
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Customs agents snatch woman with half pound of coke
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wow 24/7)
 
 
 
Confirmed: Tom Hardy gets more and more menacing with each new role
source: wow247.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Gabriel Valley Tribune)
 
 
 
While the rest of the nation is enjoying lower gasoline prices, California will see an increase of about 30 cents per gallon by the time you wake up tomorrow
source: sgvtribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 25, 2016
(IGN)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, the team finds themselves in the post-apocalyptic hellscape of Star City. In a 2046 where Vandal Savage wasn't stopped. (CW 8ET)
source: ign.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 24, 2016
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Today: Eddie Izzard has completed a marathon. Tomorrow: Eddie Izzard has completed a marathon. Thursday: Eddie Izzard has completed a marathon. Friday: Eddie Izzard has completed a marathon. Next 23 days: Eddie Izzard has completed a marathon
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue February 23, 2016
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Hipsters reinvent the automat, think it's totes a new thing
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 96.5 Florida)
 
 
 
This paralyzed bunny moves faster than you on his sweet custom skateboard wheelchair
source: news965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
The big lesson learned by the Idaho militiamen after a twelve-year-old girl was shot in the stomach at a meeting? "Watch your barrel discipline"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBT Mishawaka)
 
 
 
Ben Carson wants to become the country's first African-American president
source: wsbt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
How did the first day of the post-Scalia SCOTUS go? Sotomayor smacked Alito with his privilege so hard he'll be wearing that hangdog expression on his face for years
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 22, 2016
(US News)
 
 
 
Starbucks drinks have up to 25 teaspoons of sugar. Which is no big deal, as long as customers have them with one of their blueberry insulin scones
source: usnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 19, 2016
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Plumber arrested for showing customer his faucet
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
If you're a Comcast customer who lost service during Monday's nationwide outage, you're entitled to a one day credit. Don't forget to call in, wait on hold, ask for an agent and request your $2
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 18, 2016
(Comic Book Resources)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, With half the team in Vandal Savage's hands extreme measures are contemplated (CW 8ET)
source: comicbookresources.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
So, stop me if you've heard this one, President Obama, Morgan Freeman, and Tom Hanks walk into a restaurant
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Bottoms up
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Microsoft will sell at least one customer a telemetry-free version of Windows 10
source: blogs.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 17, 2016
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Some South Carolinian Republicans are starting to get a real sick feeling to their stomach about what their party has become. "I'd take Bernie over Trump"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 15, 2016
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
A little letter from Abraham Lincoln in 1864 now worth $900,000. Now go check the bottom drawer in that old desk in the garage
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Odds are if you're reading this headline, you're not a Comcast customer
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
You're not going to believe this, but a CEO of one of the world's largest companies may have lied to save his own butt, at the expense of employees, shareholders, and customers
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat February 13, 2016
(LA Times)
 
 
 
In praise of the truly rare minerals on earth, and diamonds aren't one of them: "Scientists say there is so little cobaltomenite on our planet that you could probably fit it all into a container the size of a shot glass"
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Fraudster offering "Free & Clear Real Estate System" bilks customers out of $267 million. Facing $113 million judgment from FTC, mysteriously goes free and clear, prompting 60-person search party
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 12, 2016
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Dollar General assumes all their customers have cars built before 1988
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 11, 2016
(Variety)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, The team hunts Savage in 1986 Russia, but it's not all blue jeans and Yakov Smirnoff (CW 8ET)
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 10, 2016
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Like a long-time abuser begging their significant other not to take the kids and leave, Comcast is begging Atlanta customers not to switch to Google Fiber
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Actor Tommy Kelly dead at age 90, according to his brother Johnny Kelly, law-abiding nightclub owner
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sports Illustrated)
 
 
 
You're an NHL goalie with 40 pounds of gear on, 3rd period, tie game, and those chimichangas you had for dinner are bubbling up in your stomach. What do you do. "I panicked... I don't remember if I wiped"
source: si.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue February 09, 2016
(Brand Eating)
 
 
 
Domino's China celebrates new year, unveils Fish Deluxe pizza topped with fish-shaped fish sticks, green bell peppers, corn, French lardons, pepperoni, and cherry tomatoes. Probably worth a fin
source: brandeating.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TV Guide)
 
 
 
Tonight, on the Flash, Barry encounters Killer Frost (CW 8ET) Later, on Agent Carter, an atomic bomb threatens all of California (ABC 9ET) Meanwhile, on iZombie, Babineaux and Liv investigate three headless bodies (CW 9ET)
source: tvguide.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
When you work the drive-through window in Florida, you must accept the fact that at some point, a customer is going to throw an alligator at you
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 08, 2016
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
VW to dealers: We're offering you a buyback. VW to customers: Eat a bag of dicks, suckers
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun February 07, 2016
(Rotten Tomatoes)
 
 
 
Deadpool currently at 96% at Rotten Tomatoes, but I'm sure it'll go down faster than your mom
source: rottentomatoes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Von Miller, Josh Norman, and Marshawn Lynch join Conan for a very special edition of Clueless Gamer. "Tom Brady- he got blew up"
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Nicholas Sparks admits they pretty much had to scrape the bottom of the barrel to find anyone willing to star in The Notebook
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat February 06, 2016
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Angry customer fires off load at Tampa strip club, killing one and wounding seven. I guess that was a gun in his pocket after all
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
The world's most accurate clock has no hands because everyone knows you measure time by the duration of 9, 192, 631, 770 periods of the radiation corresponding to the transition between two hyperfine levels of the ground state of a cesium 133 atom
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 05, 2016
(Lightly Buzzed)
 
 
 
Bill Romanowski goes on air to describe with relish how he'd like to sack Cam Newton and then choke him to death at the bottom of a pile
source: lightlybuzzed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
In most countries, stores would stop selling faulty-deep fryers and self-igniting matches after the first few reports of blinded employees and customers with holes burned in their legs. Not in Australia, though
source: internationalsupermarketnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 04, 2016
(Comic Book Resources)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, Rip Hunter attempts to disrupt Vandal Savage's finances in an attempt to weaken the immortal (CW 8ET)
source: comicbookresources.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KLTV Tyler)
 
 
 
We have standards. You'll never fit in at Taco Bueno unless you can hotwire a customer's car in under twelve seconds
source: kltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 03, 2016
(Bristol Post (UK))
 
 
 
"A spokesman for Wetherspoons confirmed the restaurant had to close last night because of a rat problem, but said he could not confirm whether a rat ran up a customer's trouser and ate a chip from his hand"
source: bristolpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Microsoft says after six months Windows 10 has passed XP in number of users. The news will eventually reach Vista and ME customers just as soon as their computers finally boot up
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Visit Tokyo zoo where today you can see a panicky pantomime zebra being poked with a stick
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
The pajama-bottoms-in-public epidemic is so bad a judge had to have a framed sign put up reminding people to GET DRESSED before coming to court
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue February 02, 2016
(ABC11 North Carolina)
 
 
 
Chris Christie finds the perfect campaign tagline. "Ask not what your country can do for you; ask... what is this $#% on the bottom of my shoe?"
source: abc11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Public school choo choo chooses not to invite Cupid, Baby Jesus, Tom Turkey along with other "dominant holidays." No word on the inclusion of any submissive holidays
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: For quite some time, my best friend has joked that she and I should leave our husbands, run away together, and just spend the rest of our lives together. As a couple. I think she's in love with me. What should I do?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 01, 2016
(CBP)
 
 
 
Customs agent, who has clearly never met a mechanic, seizes 76 pounds of marijuana declared as auto parts
source: cbp.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The SEC filed a case against Goldman -Sachs alleging that for 5 years GS cheated customers by charging for a service they didn't provide, thereby causing customers to violate SEC rules. $15 mil and no admission of wrongdoing later, it's settled
source: mobile.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun January 31, 2016
(Metro)
 
 
 
Monday is National Sickie Day in the UK. Here are 16 reasons to call off tomorrow. Subby would consider it, but calling in sick would be a lie and management cannot lie to itself. Plus, there's that conference call and End of Month reports
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat January 30, 2016
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Your inner child will go nuts over this giant automated bubble-making machine
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
The Iowa caucuses reach their due date tomorrow. Here's a breakdown of the polling for every campaign - even those who flat-lined and had to be terminated in the second trimester
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri January 29, 2016
(Fox News)
 
 
 
U.S. Customs officials seize 16,000 counterfeit hoverboards, prevent 16,000 real accidents
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Wendy's warns customers about "unusual activity" on some credit cards used at its restaurants, aside from the usual charges for cardiologists, weight loss clinics, insulin
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
McDonald's response to customers' complaints about no cheese in their mozzarella sticks? Cooking is tricky
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 28, 2016
(Fox 4 Now Fort Myers)
 
 
 
Floridians are so accustomed to seeing plastic pink flamingos, they apparently have forgotten how to act around actual flamingos
source: fox4now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Michigan State basketball players stoked by success in lime-green Nike uniforms, hope to wear them again. Tom Izzo: "17-year-olds like them and right now I like 17-year-olds more than 80-year olds"
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KUOW Seattle)
 
 
 
Construction crews unearth ancient mammoth bones beneath Oregon State football stadium end zone. Experts believe they were stomped to death by ancient ducks during some prehistoric civil war
source: kuow.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IGN)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Legends of Tomorrow, the Atom suit falls into the wrong hands (CW 8ET)
source: ign.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
♪ Who can take your trash out? Stomp it down real low? Screw a hooker then say he was hit while clearing snow? The garbage man can, oh the garbage man can ♫
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed January 27, 2016
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Protesters can't even get tomatoes to stick to Teflon Don
source: national.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Forget the hard hits at the upcoming Super Bowl, two American physics labs are vying for a billion-dollar atom smasher
source: motherboard.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Deflategate II? Von Miller of the Denver Broncos says the ball he intercepted from Tom Brady felt a little flat
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
 
 
Deflategate worked out so well for Tom Brady last year that the NFL is doubling down with a Peyton Manning investigation this year
source: denver.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue January 26, 2016
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Broncos player allegedly tried to rub his genitals in Tom Brady's face repeatedly
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
"3 minutes to midnight" is great news if you are at a New Year's Eve Party event, but terrible news if you are at an Atomic Scientists' Doomsday Clock event
source: paleofuture.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
NewsFlash
 
Abe Vigoda joins Morgan Freeman, Justin Bieber, Tom Hanks, Chris Brown and Abe Vigoda in the afterlife
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Tom Delay has a feeling that the FBI is on the verge of indicting Hillary, and he would know having been indicted a time or two himself
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVM Columbus)
 
 
 
Bakery tries to assure customer that a racial slur on little girl's birthday cake was a complete accident
source: wtvm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Elon Musk: Cheap oil prices will hurt eco-friendly automobile industry the hardest
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
Every time an Uber driver brakes too sharply or speeds, their smartphone puts it on the record in case of customer complaints. And you're next
source: thestack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun January 24, 2016
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
King Arthur Flour's Grilled Cheese Challenge had the Green Mountain Special, the French Melt, the Hog Wild, and the Sweet & Shallot. All of them were different but all of them served with a cup of tomato soup The only soup to have with a GCS
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat January 23, 2016
(The Hill)
 
 
 
While people in the Mid-Atlantic sit in their nice warm homes during the blizzard, soldiers will still stand guard at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier at Arlington National Cemetery
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Leave it to someone from Texas to make a business where customers get to destroy rooms full of furniture with sledgehammers and other instruments of destruction. "There's a lot of frustrated people in this city"
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 21, 2016
(TV Guide)
 
 
 
Tonight, On the premier of Legends of Tomorrow, A time traveler gathers a band of misfits to save the world. (CW 8ET)
source: tvguide.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed January 20, 2016
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Martin Shkreli fires his legal team, tells news media to leave him alone. "I would suggest paparazzi stay outta my way, that's all I'm going to say," Stomps off to be at gym in 26 minutes
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue January 19, 2016
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
More proof that the shaving fad is over. "Mommy, why do you have a beard on your bottom?"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon January 18, 2016
(Consequence of Sound)
 
 
 
HBO to air seven-and-a-half-hour Godfather cut together with unseen footage, so that we finally see the bit where Tom Bombadil is one of the gunmen who whacks Sonny at the toll plaza
source: consequenceofsound.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun January 17, 2016
(Doctor Who News)
 
 
 
Doctor Who wins 'Golden Tomato' award from Rotten Tomatoes. Some fans still propose throwing the award at showrunner Steven Moffat
source: doctorwhonews.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Cannabist)
 
 
 
Most marijuana-related ER visits are due to symptoms of hyperventilation caused by anxiety. If only there was some harmless, natural herb that had a calming effect
source: thecannabist.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat January 16, 2016
(NFL)
 
 
 
Will the arrowhead deflate Tom Brady's balls, or could Bill Belichick almost have an emotion after winning a game as NFL playoff weekend begins when the Kansas City Chefs face the New England Patriots, 4:30 PM ET on CBS
source: nfl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 14, 2016
(myAJC)
 
 
 
Customer tries to return winter coat to online retailer, finds room becomes suddenly dusty
source: myajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Tom Coughlin could take the coaching job in Philadelphia, mostly because his wife doesn't want to move. Now that's commitment
source: espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsMax)
 
 
 
Trump tops Cruz; Rubio bottoms in GOP fantasy 3-way
source: newsmax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Just another night for both customers and employees of one Cobb County Waffle House
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
Would-be robbers stopped by T-mobile employee with a gun. No word on what happens to customers who come in to complain about their crappy cell reception
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed January 13, 2016
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Tom Cotton: I can haz war with Iran? Iran: No, not yours
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Remember: Tomorrow, if you learn that your Powerball numbers hit, take a moment to make sure you're holding the correct day's ticket before you walk away from your desk and tell your boss to shove it
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Either Steve Harvey decided it would be a pretty good idea to not piss off his private jet broker, or his private jet broker decided it would be a pretty good idea to not piss off a guy who can afford a private jet with "about $200,000 of customization work"
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue January 12, 2016
(Newser)
 
 
 
How getting that catfish surgically removed from your stomach can help you feel 20 years younger
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action A Go-Go)
 
 
 
Everything you need to know about Marvel comics big crossover SECRET WARS, which will be ending tomorrow after issue 9 is released
source: actionagogo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun January 10, 2016
(Storify)
 
 
 
Live-tweeting a Trump rally: "A guy is wearing the bottom half of a 10 year old flip-phone around his neck with a length of yarn, he literally keeps shouting 'mother'"
source: storify.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat January 09, 2016
(Powerball)
 
 
 
Will only one person win and decide tomorrow which country they want to buy? How big of a dent will the taxes put in the national debt? Will it be a Farker who'll buy everybody a beer and TotalFark? Its the Powerball drawing, live at 11PM ET/8 PT
source: powerball.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NFL)
 
 
 
After watching a curbstomping, now it's time for football as the Pittsburgh Steelers face the Cincinnati Bengals in part two of AFC Wild Card day, 8:15 PM on CBS
source: nfl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Starbucks adds coconut milk lattes to menu in continuing attempt to attract customers who don't like the taste of coffee
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
From London Sun: Tonight's EuroMillions draw is predicted to hit £44million and tomorrow's National Lotto is a record £57.8million. From American schlub: Amateurs
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Eagles request permission to interview Tom Coughlin for head coaching job
source: espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri January 08, 2016
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Walgreens' mandarin oranges recalled because shards of glass may give you a very small pane in the stomach
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Addicting Info)
 
 
 
Remember when Senator Tom Cotton tried sabotaging the Iran nuclear deal? Turns out he had 960,000 reasons for doing it
source: addictinginfo.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 07, 2016
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Sorry guys, but today red wine is now bad for you. Come back tomorrow
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
There are some foods Tom Brady refuses to eat, even on cheat days
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed January 06, 2016
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
League Cup semifinals today and tomorrow. Merseyside taking on all comers Reds and Potters (and the Stoke weather) followed by Blues and Citeh tomorrow. 3PM eastern
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Seattle Times says that Fark fires off this winning headline: "49ers get a Tomsulactomy"
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue January 05, 2016
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Company recalls 89,000lbs of meat after customers complain of new Beef N' Splinters flavor
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon January 04, 2016
(The Street)
 
 
 
Just like their customers, Chipotle's stock quickly takes a dump
source: thestreet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Giants head coach Tom Coughlin will not be fired
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Hillary Clinton vows to "get to the bottom" of UFOs if she becomes the next President of the United States - probably employing a probe of some sort
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Turns out attractive people really do get better seats in restaurants than you do: "Good looking customers attract more people and make you more cash, so you sit them where they can be seen"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Francisco 49ers)
 
 
 
49ers get a Tomsulactomy
source: 49ers.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun January 03, 2016
(Metro)
 
 
 
Tomorrow will be the busiest day of the year for divorce lawyers
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Japan News)
 
 
 
"As awareness has spread of the Western custom of daytime drinking, it probably makes [Japanese people] have less resistance to it"
source: the-japan-news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri January 01, 2016
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Arlington County, VA taxicab service starts the New Year by giving its customers one more reason to switch to Uber
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 

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