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Headlines matching 'shed'
Thu February 09, 2012
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Politico) Stupid Like a typical politician, Obama wants to be reelected, raise money AND make clear policy distinctions with his opposition. How droll, how uncouth, how offensive to sensibilities of our cherished political punditry. Have you no shame sir?  (politico.com) (44)
(Some Wicked Willy) Amusing The judge found Alan Berger voluntarily signed up for the beer-drinking game of beer pong, and couldn't sue Wicked Willy. The judge said Berger "consumed alcohol to the point of diminished capacity"  (wtsp.com) (21)
(USA Today) Stupid Toppling TVs have crushed four Chicago children since October, so clearly it's time to start putting warning labels on these Doom Tubes and maybe start requiring protective gear to watch them  (usatoday.com) (121)


Mon February 06, 2012
(News.com.au) Asinine Pop quiz. A woman and baby are being washed away by a flood. What do you do? WHAT DO YOU DO? c) pull out your smart phone and shoot the video  (news.com.au) (184)


Sun February 05, 2012
(Buzzfeed) Amusing These 24 books have actually been published  (buzzfeed.com) (95)
(SLTrib) Scary For all those who have wished Josh Powell would diaf, here ya go  (sltrib.com) (165)
(Q2) Scary Pilots say any landing you can walk away from is a good landing--even if you have to walk through the living room and out the front door of the house you crashed into. With pic  (ktvq.com) (50)


Fri January 27, 2012
(Daily Kos) Dumbass Santorum: Obama wants all kids to go to school so they can be "brainwashed"  (dailykos.com) (175)


Tue January 24, 2012
(TMZ) Scary Demi Moore rushed to the hospital after an apparent overdose  (tmz.com) (125)


Sun January 22, 2012
(Deadline) Fail NBC finished in 8th place on Thursday night thanks to the highly unwatched The Firm; it was beaten by a Univision program, a couple of Big Bang Theory reruns, and Jersey Shore  (deadline.com) (137)


Fri January 20, 2012
(Hot Air) Obvious I just want to thank ABC.. all the networks and cable TV in fact, for helping me validate my conclusion that they are mostly Obama's servile, complacent, undistinguished media (SCUM)  (hotair.com) (105)


Thu January 19, 2012
(Yahoo) Followup Warren Buffett writes check made out to the United States Treasury for just over $49,000 to help pay down the national debt. Was spent by the time subby finished writing out this headline  (finance.yahoo.com) (190)


Wed January 18, 2012
(io9) Interesting The producers of Farscape are making a Firefly-esque space-western with an MMO tie-in for Syfy. It was cancelled before they even finished the announcement  (io9.com) (75)


Tue January 17, 2012
(USA Today) Florida O.J. Simpson loses Florida home to bank foreclosure. Current asking price now slashed to the bone  (content.usatoday.com) (77)


Sat January 14, 2012
(Some Guy) Interesting One hurt in crash outside Coca-Cola plant. Police speculate the driver of the Mello Yello car was Fantasizing about Mr. Pibb before the car was Crushed  (nbcconnecticut.com) (37)


Wed January 11, 2012
(Buffalo News) Interesting The next time some guy from Buffalo claims he has a Michelangelo painting stashed under his couch, you might not want to drag him to the mental hospital just yet  (buffalonews.com) (37)
(Some Guy) Dumbass "Is Liberalism killing the comics industry?" asks article writer who conveniently forgets the lame, rehashed stories, pointless gimmicks, and lack of mainstream distribution as the real causes of the comics industry dying  (ricochet.com) (108)
(Some Guy) Strange Not news: cell phone goes off during NY Phil orchestra concert. News: for five straight minutes. Fark: and continued ringing even after the conductor stopped the orchestra and asked the man with the offending phone "are you finished?"   (super-conductor.blogspot.com) (258)


Tue January 10, 2012
(Washington Post) Followup In violation of long-established policy, the FAA decides to do the reasonable thing  (washingtonpost.com) (54)


Mon January 09, 2012
(Yahoo) Cool Barry Larkin finally gets his call from Cooperstown. Meanwhile, Tim Raines, Jeff Bagwell, and Edgar Martinez are wondering how they finished so far behind Jack Morris  (sports.yahoo.com) (87)
(New York Daily News) Sad No good deed goes unpunished by a train  (nydailynews.com) (30)


Thu January 05, 2012
(TMZ) Stupid Elin Nordegren has the $12 million mansion she just bought demolished because it's not good enough for her. If she keeps spending cash this way, she's going to have to find another sugar daddy lottery ticket to scratch  (tmz.com) (81)
(Politico) Spiffy Herman Cain to enter the lucrative 'vanity bus tour' market, directly competing with established brands like Sarah Palin  (politico.com) (26)


Wed January 04, 2012
(HelenaIR.com) Weird Montana train locomotive ambushed, fired upon. This is not a repeat from 1892  (helenair.com) (72)


Mon January 02, 2012
(Denver Post) Weird Reason #54 why you shouldn't have your body cryogenically frozen: Every year your family might take your body out of its storage shed and drive with it around town in a hearse parade while the locals toss frozen salmon and have coffin races  (denverpost.com) (57)


Sun January 01, 2012
(Some Guy) Photoshop Photoshop Challenge: Finish this unfinished sketch  (s017.radikal.ru) (36)


Sat December 31, 2011
(LA Times) Strange AGNES, a suit developed by MIT, makes you feel like a lazy, malnourished 75 year-old. No word if it includes successful bowel movement celebration mode  (latimesblogs.latimes.com) (28)


Tue December 27, 2011
(Huffington Post) Dumbass Victoria Jackson leaves a six hour FBI meeting for washed up comedians with hours and hours of terrifying material from old Monty Python skits  (huffingtonpost.com) (166)
(Some Guy) Interesting Jared Leto is 40. I guess his so-called life is halfway finished  (hlntv.com) (40)


Sat December 24, 2011
(Some Cooking Guy) Spiffy Subby'll be having Rosemary Garlic Prime Rib, caramelized carrots, asparagus w/ hollandaise sauce, steamed broccoli, mashed potatoes and Yorkshire pudding for Christmas dinner. What are you having?  (primetimesteakhouse.com) (283)
(Politifact) Dumbass Second sentence of Politifact mailbag article: "Of roughly 1,500 e-mails we received, nearly all criticized our choice." About half the e-mails Politifact published: "Thank you, Politifact"  (politifact.com) (139)


Fri December 23, 2011
(CNN) Asinine Q: What do you call a guy who finished last in medical school? A: Better qualified than some of the hacks running around in Army hospitals  (cnn.com) (83)
(Huffington Post) Interesting Gingrich campaign on Calista: "We're waiting to unleash her". Complete with creepy Calista waiting to be unleashed pic  (huffingtonpost.com) (118)
(Mother Nature Network) Interesting If a pigeon is flying eastbound over your driveway at 6 mph, and you just finished washing your car 11 minutes ago, how is it able to precisely calculate exactly when to crap all over it?  (mnn.com) (12)


Tue December 20, 2011
(BBC) Strange Uploader of pirate copy of "X-Men Origins: Wolverine" sentenced to one year in federal prison. Hasn't he been punished enough?  (bbc.co.uk) (177)


Mon December 19, 2011
(Seattle Times) Strange If you're the only employee working at a pet food shop and you've got five pounds of pot stashed there, don't take a nap on the job just in case a customer comes in and gets so worried he calls the cops  (seattletimes.nwsource.com) (15)


Sun December 18, 2011
(Miami Herald) Obvious About 20 seconds after the last U.S. HMMWV crossed into Kuwait, Iraq's Prime Minister launched a coup to take full control of the country. Mission Accomplished  (miamiherald.com) (179)
(Engadget) Dumbass Al Franken grills the phone companies and device manufacturers on the purpose and capabilities of CarrierIQ and is somehow surprised when their answers are consistent with previously established facts  (engadget.com) (94)


Fri December 16, 2011
(BBC) Unlikely Japan's Prime Minister declares Fukushima nuclear site "stable", marking the worst stretching of the truth by a head of state since "Mission Accomplished"  (bbc.co.uk) (64)
(Marketwatch) Unlikely The market will be up 10% in six months, according to an analyst who just polished off a fresh crack rock  (marketwatch.com) (27)


Thu December 15, 2011
(The New York Times) Followup Mission Accomplished 2, Electric Boogaloo  (nytimes.com) (41)


Tue December 13, 2011
(CNN) Fail United States servicemen will sally down to the Seychelles seashore to secure a slightly smashed drone  (security.blogs.cnn.com) (69)


Wed December 07, 2011
(Engadget) Unlikely Google: "Next version of Android will finally bring polished apps and a remedy for frAgdroid." Amazon: "And it's out now and running on the Kindle Fire"  (engadget.com) (59)
(BBC) Sad TP Activity Toys wiped out, flushed  (bbc.co.uk) (6)


Mon December 05, 2011
(Politico) Unlikely Marco Rubio releases new unembellished memoir. Spoiler Alert: Fidel Castro is his father  (politico.com) (29)
(ESPN) Cool Patriots fans throw snowballs and batteries at Peyton Manning in Foxboro ... just kidding, they're disappointed he wasn't playing and wished him a speedy recovery. This isn't Philadelphia, after all  (espn.go.com) (85)


Sat December 03, 2011
(TimeFreePress) Fail Sex with minors, snorting crushed pills, storing porn on city owned phones, shooting other officers and running from other law enforcement agencies... just another day in the Cleveland (Tennessee) Police Department  (timesfreepress.com) (55)


Fri December 02, 2011
(Onion AV Club) PSA Napster officially finished. Lars Ulrich will crack the bubbly  (avclub.com) (178)
(USA Today) Fail That wet splat you just heard was Cain's ranking in the polls bottoming out in the single digits. That, or he just finished up with another mistress  (usatoday.com) (104)
(Chicago Sun-Times) Followup Mall used in "Blues Brothers" movie to be demolished, yet again  (southtownstar.suntimes.com) (67)


Thu December 01, 2011
(Starpulse) Amusing Cee Lo Green has unfinished tattoo on his back that says "UCK YOU"  (starpulse.com) (17)


Wed November 30, 2011
(Some Lapp Dancing Guy) Ironic Maija the traffic safety reindeer killed in traffic accident. Memorial services will be held next week. The Police are asking the public to bring their own mashed potatoes and lingonberry sauce  (hs.fi) (13)


Tue November 29, 2011
(Bitten and Bound) Ironic Kelly Preston shed 39 pounds after giving birth at 48. Her secret weapon .... Kirstie Alley  (bittenandbound.com) (28)
(BBC) Strange British coastguard alert ships in Bristol Channel to avoid a two-door compact car last seen bobbing up and down off the pier at Mumbles. Alert cancelled this morning when car discovered washed up on beach at nearby Raised-Eyebrows-on-Sea  (bbc.co.uk) (31)
(ESPN) Obvious Gary Kubiak has mentioned his name, over the horizon, on a tractor, unfinished business. They call him... FAVRE  (espn.go.com) (74)
(NPR) Unlikely Just like cheerleaders are real athletes and self-published writers are real authors, Air Force drone operators would like you to know that they're real pilots, damnit  (npr.org) (235)


Mon November 28, 2011
(ESPN) Cool Hey Ohio State, looking to hire a washed-up former UF coach for your team? Well congratulations, you just hit the jackpot  (espn.go.com) (33)


Sun November 27, 2011
(Cape Cod Times) Scary Fear is the path to the Dark Side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to smashed car windows in the Toys R Us parking lot  (capecodonline.com) (35)


Fri November 25, 2011
(Abc.net.au) Interesting Discovery of ancient hooks suggest that early humans fished for tuna. Scientists warn it still could be red herring  (abc.net.au) (29)


Tue November 22, 2011
(Talking Points Memo) Asinine GOP pushed to privatize Medicare during super committee negotiations   (tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com) (77)
(Canada.com) Weird Father says daughter is only accusing him of sexual assault because she's been brainwashed by her triple-murderer husband. Either way, Thanksgiving is going to be awkward  (canada.com) (44)


Sun November 20, 2011
(Forbes) Amusing Newt Gingrich is trashed by those class-warring radical leftists at Forbes Magazine  (forbes.com) (66)


Fri November 18, 2011
(FrogSoda) Fail Beer Fail... I did shed a tear after watching this  (frogsoda.com) (20)
(Boston Herald) Dumbass Don't you hate it when you almost miss your exit and cut across lanes at the last minute and you would have made it if you hadn't smashed into a cop car you didn't notice?  (bostonherald.com) (77)


Wed November 16, 2011
(The Epoch Times) Scary China: the Enron of countries: "Every province in China is Greece", "The regime's officially published GDP of 9 percent is also fabricated . . . China's GDP has decreased 10 percent"  (theepochtimes.com) (95)


Tue November 15, 2011
(Oregon Live) Obvious PBS rockstar chef Christopher Kimball advises Thanksgiving cooks to "strip down the menu. Have the turkey, mashed potatoes and one other vegetable. And then forget the salad. Forget the six other sides"  (oregonlive.com) (225)
(Helsingin Sanomat) Spiffy Sketches of Sibelius' unfinnished eighth symphony, long thought burned, may have been found at the University of Helsinki  (hs.fi) (30)


Mon November 14, 2011
(Fox News) Sad As Blackberry fades into obsolescence, a look back at some other once-ubiquitous tech firms that crashed and burned  (foxnews.com) (130)


Sun November 13, 2011
(Some Guy) Misc Vehicles have crashed into Kathy's fence over 30 times, so she redesigned it to be safer. This is how women are different from men  (www2.ljworld.com) (219)


Fri November 11, 2011
(The Register) Stupid New EU "Right to be forgotten" proposal could allow everyone to demand to have unfavorable news articles about them flushed down the memory hole  (theregister.co.uk) (29)
(BBC) Cool After 70 years, a WWII era Spitfire that crashed in 1941 is unearthed. Cool: The plane is in astounding condition. Ultracool: The Browning machine guns are built to last (w/ video)  (bbc.co.uk) (149)


Thu November 10, 2011
(Politico) Fail Michele Bachmann lost her cool after her speaking event was crashed by Occupiers, and she responds by trotting out the old Bush-era "They're unAmerican and disrespect soldiers" line  (politico.com) (404)
(BBC) Cool Hummingbirds shake like a dog to shed water. WIth slo-mo video goodness  (bbc.co.uk) (7)


Wed November 09, 2011
(Yahoo) Interesting Ever wished you been born with a bigger brain? Had, say, two-thirds more neurons in your frontal lobe than the average human? Well, if you had been, you'd be autisitic  (news.yahoo.com) (67)


Tue November 08, 2011
(EITB) Ironic Eviction from a house, but from a grave? Pushed for space, a Spanish cemetery has begun placing stickers on thousands of burial sites with lapsed leases as a warning to relatives that their ancestors face possible eviction  (eitb.com) (61)


Sat November 05, 2011
(Scientific American) Obvious Why daylight savings time should be abolished: It cuts into my drinking time  (blogs.scientificamerican.com) (185)


Tue November 01, 2011
(NBC Sports) Amusing After explaining how Oakland's young group of wide receivers shouldn't be pushed aside to make room for Terrell Owens, Carson Palmer explains how they should be pushed aside to make room for TJ Houshmandzadeh   (profootballtalk.nbcsports.com) (36)
(Daily Mail) Scary While shopping at Target, woman struck by shopping cart that two boys pushed off a four-story parking garage. Bullseye  (dailymail.co.uk) (78)


Mon October 31, 2011
(Some Guy) Dumbass Wall Street says it's just come up with a revolutionary idea: Free music with profits coming from concerts. You know, the idea that's been pushed by music fans for well over a decade  (allthingsd.com) (56)
(NineMSN) Interesting Taylor Swift calls in lawyers over photo of topless lookalike being published. Lawyers insist that they can prove it's not Swift because the topless model is capable of different facial expressions  (news.ninemsn.com.au) (51)
(Some Guy) Stupid Unwashed hippy masses of OWS getting a dosage of reality as Atlas Shrugs against them  (realclearmarkets.com) (119)


Sun October 30, 2011
(Denver Post) Interesting You can be part of the 1% that gets to ski down the Aspen slopes before the rest of the unwashed masses for only $25,000  (denverpost.com) (86)
(The New York Times) Fail Mission still not accomplished: U.S. plans post-Iraq troop increase in Persian Gulf including new combat forces in Kuwait capable of re-invading Iraq just as soon as their government collapses  (nytimes.com) (337)


Sat October 29, 2011
(Cracked) Amusing The 50 creepiest pieces of romance advice ever published  (cracked.com) (45)


Fri October 28, 2011
(Daily Mail) Sad Could I BE any more washed up looking?  (dailymail.co.uk) (80)
(Daily Mail) Sad High school student crushed after learning he had to do a pull up  (dailymail.co.uk) (102)


Thu October 27, 2011
(Some Guy) Interesting Will you shed your label conservative or liberal and replace it with Constitutionalist? Will you pledge your allegiance to the dual federalism of the Constitution, all the time, every time, every vote...no exceptions?  (forgottenmen.com) (144)
(My Fox DC) Interesting And this is a nice little four- bedroom, three bathroom, 3,200 square foot house with granite countertops, finished basement and a Lamborghini Diablo  (myfoxdc.com) (90)


Wed October 26, 2011
(Yahoo) Hero Last Polish Battle of Britain pilot dies. He was credited with 3 Luftwaffe kills, 1 Distinguished Flying Cross and 2 giant brass perogies  (news.yahoo.com) (125)
(Seattle Times) Misc Condit Dam to be demolished after the Levy disappeared   (seattletimes.nwsource.com) (33)


Tue October 25, 2011
(Glendale News Press) Dumbass L.A.'s "Love Ride" Grand Marshall Jay Leno joked about the fundraiser's untarnished safety record, and his desire to see "somebody go down". Guess what happened for the first time in the ride's 28 year history?  (glendalenewspress.com) (103)
(Some Guy) Asinine Look, citizen, just because we broke down your door, smashed all your windows, busted holes in your wall and left the smell of tear gas while you waited in one of our complimentary jail cells doesn't make us responsible. Sleep tight, citizen  (sacramento.cbslocal.com) (125)


Mon October 24, 2011
(Ars Technica) Obvious Climate skeptics' bombshell paper might not get published. Guess why  (arstechnica.com) (456)


Sun October 23, 2011
(Boston.com) Dumbass People pay eight times more for fish with a higher prestige name that can only be distinguished from the cheap kind by DNA testing  (boston.com) (165)


Fri October 21, 2011
(Fox News) Stupid Good news, everybody: Herman Cain has finished the last bits of 999. And no worries, the poor won't have to pay more taxes as long as they live in opportunity zones and give up minimum wage and unions  (foxnews.com) (353)


Thu October 20, 2011
(Some Guy) Fail Good: School calls parents to say the bus carrying their special-needs children home will be a little late. Fark: Does not tell them it's because the driver passed out, crossed oncoming traffic and crashed into a tree  (wtkr.com) (42)
(Washington Post) Scary Well, it's one month before their Thanksgiving deadline, and so far the debt Supercommittee has accomplished...absolutely nothing  (washingtonpost.com) (65)


Wed October 19, 2011
(Life.com) Hero Republished for the first time in four decades, the single greatest piece of photographic reportage from the war in Vietnam, though the lens of a man who didn't make it out of the war alive. Hero tag is for him  (life.com) (137)
(Philly.com) Obvious Senate votes against an anti-potato bill hashed together by the USDA, considering it half-baked. USDA vows to fry again. Au gratin  (philly.com) (170)


Fri October 14, 2011
(Fark) Obvious Fark's Weird News Quiz, demonstrating the inverse relationship between how well you score on it and how much work you actually accomplished this week  (fark.com) (36)


Wed October 12, 2011
(Daily Bugle) Sad Five paintings, stolen by thief named "Spiderman" and worth $135 million, including works by Picasso, Matisse and Modigliano, may have been accidentally destroyed by Garbage Man, Garbage Man, who crushed the art in a garbage can  (thelocal.fr) (141)
(Washington Post) Fail "He asked the jury to consider whether a decorated and accomplished special forces member who had a role in the 2011 movie 'Transformers: Dark of the Moon' would risk everything in a scheme to sell arms in the US"  (washingtonpost.com) (61)

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