Skip to content
Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
headlines found matching 'police'
Wed March 20, 2019
(KMOV St. Louis)
 
 
 
Okay you misbehaving pre-schoolers. Take off your clothes and stand naked in the closet. And I better not hear you saying I'll show you mine if you show me yours
source: kmov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPBF West Palm Beach)
 
 
 
Wrestling coach does his best Darth Vader impression. Some people have a problem with that
source: wpbf.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 19, 2019
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
The man had reportedly wrapped raw meat around a neighbor's door handle, urinated on the linoleum outside their door, and smeared toothpaste on their door peephole. Seattle needs a Tag. And oh yeah, he also stabbed a cop
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Jersey 101.5)
 
 
 
Pro tip: If you are going to transport a still illegal stash of marijuana and other "homemade" edibles laced with pot or THC in your car, try to remember to follow ALL driving rules
source: nj1015.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
It's always nice to give a heartfelt gift to a complete stranger, but offering them the gift of flight by throwing them off a freeway overpass is not universally accepted
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 35 Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida Arby's manager pepper-sprays, chases employee with knife, police say
source: fox35orlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Washington State bump stock buy-back program nets hundreds of bump stocks and gallons of tears of rage from gun nuts
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
If you hit a bicyclist and sped off without the front end of your Camaro, Indianapolis police would really like to talk to you
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
NRATV advocates arming Muslims
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Media Matters)
 
 
 
NRATV advocates arming Muslims
source: mediamatters.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Virginia State Police are manually checking the records of 2,400 defendants found not guilty by reason of insanity to make sure they are barred from buying guns. Sleep well Virginia, sleep well
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Virginia State Police are manually checking the records of 2,400 defendants found not guilty by reason of insanity to make sure they are barred from buying guns. Sleep well Virginia, sleep well
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
To make insult worse than injury man who put lead in his pencil the hard way is charged. Most likely not his best day
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Police: That woman we pulled over shot herself in the mouth after we handcuffed her behind her back. Yeah, that's the ticket
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Sometimes the Man tramples ageing hippies with jack boots, other times the Man uses Bulldozers
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Guess Who is complaining that the dance studio next door is just too damn loud?
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 18, 2019
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Man who helped a police officer down the road Saturday is now a wanted man by the police on Monday
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lehigh Valley Live)
 
 
 
"I've been doing meth ... and it feels great." Wonder what the headline left out. Oh
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
What could possibly go wrong if your internet girlfriend asks you for money?
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
What could possibly go wrong if your internet girlfriend asks you for money?
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KMOV St. Louis)
 
 
 
Carjacker misquotes Steve Miller song
source: kmov.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tacoma News Tribune)
 
 
 
Police hope to sound alarm on whoever stole 70 pound bell from Olympia elementary school
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Well, I was on my way to this gay Gypsy bar mitzvah for the disabled smoking some pot when I suddenly thought, "Gosh, the mob's a bit rubbish. I think I'll kill the Godfather for not letting me date his niece." Who's with me?
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Well, I was on my way to this gay Gypsy bar mitzvah for the disabled smoking some pot when I suddenly thought, "Gosh, the mob's a bit rubbish. I think I'll kill the Godfather for not letting me date his niece." Who's with me?
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
'Man in hours-long standoff refuses to surrender despite being inside burning home' in what's being described as a self-correcting problem
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Utrecht shooter is aarrested
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
New York's Straw Hat Riot of 1922; a days-long brawl between street gangs and dock workers over wearing a Summer hat in the Fall
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Takeout)
 
 
 
Apparently Taco Bell hot sauce saves lives, probably in exchange for making your bathroom a Superfund site
source: thetakeout.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"New campaign challenges online child sex predators." Phrasing. It's important, people
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Police say there's nothing at all suspicious about former Ferguson protesters turning up shot, burned, hanged, or finding snakes in their cars, as statistically that stuff just happens
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Please tell me that's not really a tattoo in this mugshot
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston Post and Courier)
 
 
 
One South Carolina sheriff was so corrupt that he managed to spend more than ten thousand dollars one year at a single Golden Corral, with tabs averaging $175
source: postandcourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
"This soup isn't hot OR sour enough"...*BAM BAM BAM*
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KJRH Tulsa)
 
 
 
Sanctuary
source: kjrh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Body of Orange shooting suspect found in San Diego after manhunt, finally allowing Oompa Loompas to relax
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJRT)
 
 
 
St Patrick's Day without at least one murder is a dull affair. Someone got the party started early
source: abc12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
That's Deputy Shaq to you
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If he didn't literally have egg on his face before, Australian Senator Anning surely will now. The Australian PM is a fan of Egg Boy
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun March 17, 2019
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
I'll see your lamb on the Gowanus and raise you a South Bronx fugitive goat
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
A 14-year-old girl was first to report multimillionaire Jeffrey Epstein to police and long believed she was victim attached to guilty plea. But prosecutors actually chose older teen, easing his burdens as registered sex offender
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Facebook)
 
 
 
When melting snow and falling rain cause dangerous flooding in Green Bay locals exchange foam rubber cheese hats for inflatable swans
source: facebook.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
UK police would like to trace the person who stole a bin full of dog crap... they don't want the bin (or the crap) back, they just want to know what the hell he was thinking
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Chicago Guy)
 
 
 
"Arrest Me, I'm Irish" The annual Chicago St.Pat's police radio report is out and it doesn't disappoint
source: cwbchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vulture)
 
 
 
Paris Jackson responds to TMZ reporting she attempted suicide by tweeting 'farking liars' should pro-create with themselves. Is that even a denial?
source: vulture.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Guy acts suspicious at Grocery Outlet, flees police, crashes car on the freeway, gets out, jumps on the hood of another car and starts taking his clothes off. Difficulty: Not Florida
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
You might need the fainting couch ready for this one. The suspect nabbed in the murder of that reputed mob boss is a guy from New Jersey, named Tony
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 10 Albany)
 
 
 
Vermont state trooper revived with Narcan and no, there aren't any words missing from that headline
source: news10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 16, 2019
(Greenville Online)
 
 
 
$150,000 in plants at garden center damaged by herbicide-spraying vandals. Police attempting to roundup suspects
source: greenvilleonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Australian teen becomes instant internet hero by egging a federal senator
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
County sheriff asks public that, if anyone recognizes this pair of men's red undies, to call their tip line
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Horse breaks free, crashes buggy in what is not a repeat from 1856
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsTalk ZB)
 
 
 
Less than 24 hours after the country's biggest gun massacre in 3 decades, New Zealand set to ban semi-automatic weapons. Meanwhile here in the US it's still too soon after Sandy Hook to do anything about them
source: newstalkzb.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
No matter how bad you thought your high school's lunch food was, be grateful it wasn't this bad
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami New Times)
 
 
 
Well, so much for the idea that "video recording and bodycams will keep police officers more accountable for their actions"
source: miaminewtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 15, 2019
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Emotionally distraught man: Stand back or I'll kill myself. Police: We gotcha, bro
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Trust.org)
 
 
 
Social media companies under scrutiny for allowing murderers to become instantly famous across a huge audience
source: news.trust.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Golden State Killer almost won that free boat, was not beaten to fullest extent of the law
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Serial Butt Grabber has been apprehended in the Upper Peninsula
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 Now Fort Myers)
 
 
 
For a guy who had just been roused while sleeping in his car in the Wendy's drive-thru, Florida Man made a valiant effort to slip the beer can into his pocket while being questioned
source: fox4now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The claims by social media that they can't police themselves against violent content are total bullsh*t
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Wrap)
 
 
 
PewDiePie is "sickened" to be name dropped by mosque shooter, unlike 8chan
source: thewrap.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
New Zealand mosque employee grabbed gun from gunman's hands, chased him off
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
♫ Spiderman, Spiderman,♫ tries to steal cigarettes and dram. Leaves the store, ♫ Then comes back. All while wearing, ♫ Spiderman mask. LOOK OUT...it's really Florida Man♫
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
New Zealand Mosque Shooter: Were/are you a supporter of Donald Trump? As a symbol of renewed white identity and common purpose? Sure. As a policy maker and leader? Dear God no
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Hardcore Libertarian proves that it IS possible to "vanish" completely from all the databases collecting and selling your personal information while still staying "on the grid" and hooked up to the internet. It's just insanely hard
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
And no surprises about the beliefs and ethnicity of the Christchurch Mosque Killer. And he's got a manifesto. He plans to plead not guilty. That's a bold plan, Cotton
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 4 Charleston)
 
 
 
Walking around asking random women to stand on your stomach for money is no way to go through Walmart
source: abcnews4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Riverfront Times)
 
 
 
This doofus with an Eye of Providence tattooed on his throat doesn't look like a ninja, but apparently he is a ninja
source: riverfronttimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Riverfront Times)
 
 
 
This doofus with an Eye of Providence tattooed on his throat doesn't look like a ninja, but apparently he is a ninja
source: riverfronttimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Man trying to transport 10 pounds of meth from Montreal to Calgary gets busted when his navigation system tells him to make a left onto that bridge going into Michigan
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 14, 2019
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
What a dickbag
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
What a dickbag
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Active shooting at New Zealand mosques. Jesus H (UPDATE: four suspects in custody)
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
On the way out of the offices, the honorary mayor defecated on the floor - leaving clean-up to the police chief and other attendees
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Police: Is that a hatchet in your pants, or are you just the Taco Bell hatchet attacker?
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Police: Is that a hatchet in your pants, or are you just the Taco Bell hatchet attacker?
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Upper Michigan's Source)
 
 
 
How bad has this winter been? Michigan man opens fire on a snow pile that attacked his car
source: uppermichiganssource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBAL-TV Baltimore)
 
 
 
First the college admissions scam. Now students caught hacking into school computer and changing grades. Ferris Bueller nods approvingly
source: wbaltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSOCTV)
 
 
 
Wreck your unmarked police car? That's OK, just call it in stolen. Just don't leave muddy bootprints at the scene of the crime and be wearing those still-muddy boots when the police come to your apartment
source: wsoctv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSOCTV)
 
 
 
Wreck your unmarked police car? That's OK, just call it in stolen. Just don't leave muddy bootprints at the scene of the crime and be wearing those still-muddy boots when the police come to your apartment
source: wsoctv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
The first rule of Special Education Fight Club is, you do not talk about Special Education Fight Club. Setting up Project Mayhem in the teacher's lounge is similarly frowned upon
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Police refute claim that their city has the highest number of distracted driving crashes, citing the extreme detail with which they report all accidents. Hopefully while not driving
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Engadget)
 
 
 
Genealogy company Family Tree DNA offering to let customers opt-out of the FBI's genetic data access, pinky swear that they won't hand over your data to them if you opt-out
source: engadget.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
Man finds body underneath his 900-pound antique floor safe after suspected break-in. Jesse Pinkman nods approvingly
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
A woman called 911 on a man screaming and running through the streets. Turns out, he's just a big Cleveland Browns fan
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Man's phone screen protector totally fails to prevent damage to screen
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Mayor arrested last month. Acting mayor arrested today. Tis the song of the south in small town Fla
source: fox13news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Abused Florida Cur rescued, deputized. Call this Cur Sir
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Atlanta Police Department accepting applications for new recruits. Bonus: doesn't matter if you smoke weed. Admiral Ackbar dubious
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
NYPD officer rescues almost free baby lamb wandering along Gowanus Expressway in NYC
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 13, 2019
(Lowell Sun)
 
 
 
Man in city's Highlands neighborhood realizes there can be only one way to threaten to kill his landlord
source: lowellsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Sovereign Citizen: "License plates? I don't need no steenkin' plates"
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Loaded handgun found in Denver Jail toilet, and no, that's not a euphemism
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Loaded handgun found in Denver Jail toilet, and no, that's not a euphemism
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Broadcasting Network)
 
 
 
Israel accuses PA of trying to start a religious war. While I dislike the Eagles and Eagle fans as much as anyone, calling it a "religious war" seems a bit extreme
source: www1.cbn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
How to keep body cam footage from an officer involved shooting from the public? Simple, just refuse to punish the officer - as if you ever would - then say the video can't be released because he could still potentially face disciplinary action
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
The kids at Newport Harbor High still haven't seen Kyle
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
The incident that has everything: Car-on-car violence, car theft, racist tirades, cell phone video, and Taco Bell. If you could get Trump, anti-vaxxers, pit bulls, circumcision, and Florida involved, it would be the ultimate Fark story
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Police are looking for a machete gang after a targeted street attack. Degree of difficulty: nowhere near any place tropical
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Man who shot Alexandria police officer in head in 2013 was released last year due to "insanity" ruling, allowed to buy gun due to "human error" and has most recently been arrested for starting fires
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Man who shot Alexandria police officer in head in 2013 was released last year due to "insanity" ruling, allowed to buy gun due to "human error" and has most recently been arrested for starting fires
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
A weak drink? On Bourbon Street? Well, I never
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Brazilians killed and wounded in school shooting
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Bridal party banned from flight to Cabo San Lucas and you better believe they had a problem with it
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Why law enforcement agencies need to stop publishing mugshots online. The Smoking Gun, Fark would beg to differ
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Priest who had 'credible charges' of indecency with children found shot to death
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Channel 3000 Madison)
 
 
 
Man arrested for providing legendary customer service
source: channel3000.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Step 1
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
What's worse than microwaved fish at the office? Raw chicken wings fried at the office. "He's putting bare chicken in the fryer and putting the sauces on them after. And yes, he said that's the seasoning"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 12, 2019
(Madison PD)
 
 
 
Police help marsupial get junk unstuck from between fence slats
source: cityofmadison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Let's check to see what's happening during Bike Week in Daytona. Cat fight? Thousands of dollars worth of damage at hotel? Cop ran over at Biggins Gentleman's Club? Meh, no different than any other week
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
The red hat who attempted to sack registered Texas voters has been sacked. Er ... steps down
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Uber driver fails to realize kidnapping a passenger might increase the fare but it pretty much means zero tip. Even if there's complimentary Cheetos and wet-wipes
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
The Testicular Bill Of Rights because two can play this game
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Artificial being gets 55 years for armed robbery. By your command
source: fannin.fetchyournews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
*bark* Have a few shots at the bar, but can't find anyone *bark* when you want to pay your tab? *bark* That might be because you broke in after hours, and *bark* FYI that's a police dog chewing on you
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Two racist white men brutally attacked a random black man - then drove 18 miles to assault another, but the big question is how come one has perfectly plucked brows?
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Anti-gun protester threatens to shoot State legislator and the NRA. No arrest made since, presumably, irony isn't considered a deadly weapon
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
White House plans next government shutdown by cutting student loan subsidies
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Pro-tip for panhandlers: Don't carry your iPhone X in your $500 purse, just in case the cops stop you while you're begging for diaper money
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Life comes at you fast. One day you're going to watch a soccer match like you do every week, the next you're starting a 14-week prison sentence for running on to the field and punching the opposition captain in the head
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tri-City Herald)
 
Weeners
 
Wieners on ice
source: tri-cityherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Adelaide Now)
 
 
 
Protip: Don't try to steal a truck with a GPS device attached and get stuck in the driver's cab on a bridge
source: adelaidenow.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Today's latest outrage: Calling somebody over 50 a senior
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(US Department of Justice)
 
 
 
So remember when federal and state prosecutors held a presser in SC a few months ago announcing the break up of an extortion ring targeting military members via PlentyofFish? Well another mysterious presser is tomorrow and it also includes Georgia
source: justice.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Woman gives family a hand
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Connor McGregor arrested AGAIN
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Connor McGregor arrested AGAIN
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Sad: Police officer accidentally shoots and kills colleague. Asinine: While they were playing at drawing their weapons
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 11, 2019
(WSYX ABC6 Columbus)
 
 
 
It's okay to carjack someone in an attempt to catch the person who just stole your car, right?
source: abc6onyourside.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Arrow, Horribly disfigured, Diaz escapes Slabside and confronts the Arrow writers. (CW 8PM ET) Later, on Black Lightning, Anissa solves the mystery of the half eaten horse. (CW 9PM ET)
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston 25 News)
 
 
 
Ryan Reynolds is the worst designated driver ever
source: boston25news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 12 Westchester)
 
 
 
Bull attacks truck, charges at police, is put down. Judge Harry inconsolable
source: newjersey.news12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Law and Crime)
 
 
 
Cops: We shouldn't have been overzealous in our arrest of Stormy Daniels, sorry. But we were there only because of human trafficking, which we didn't find any evidence of
source: lawandcrime.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
The newest dumb way to get high: chugging anti-anxiety supplements for cats
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Ranking of Fritos, Doritos, Cheetos, and Lay's chips divides the internet, as usual
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
Woman charged with attempted murder of Chicago police officer shot in Humboldt Park. Shouldn't she have had a trial first?
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
Woman charged with attempted murder of Chicago police officer shot in Humboldt Park. Shouldn't she have had a trial first?
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Bus driver "forced to pull off road" after his passengers had the bus a rockin' with naked sex (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBT Mishawaka)
 
 
 
Well, when an Iranian man and an Iranian woman fall in love, he stands in public in a heart-shaped ring of rose petals and holds balloons while he asks her to marry him. Then she says yes. Then the Iranian police rush in and take them off to jail
source: wsbt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 12 Westchester)
 
 
 
Daylight Saving Time got you dragging? Well, if you can sneak away from your boss for a bit, today is National Napping Day. So catch a bit of a lie down if you can
source: longisland.news12.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
$77,000,000 in cocaine Seized at Port of New York/Newark which for all you non-geography majors is nowhere near the Southern US border
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Someday we'll find it, the Rainbow Connection, the lovers, the dreamers, and me
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Rapper who has lyrics about committing credit card fraud learns sometimes police listen to lyrics
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Woman drives up to hospital valet, her dead 11-year-old daughter in the passenger seat. And that's when the knife comes out
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Woman drives up to hospital valet, her dead 11-year-old daughter in the passenger seat. And that's when the knife comes out
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Boston)
 
 
 
"My Maserati does 185. I lost my license, now I don't drive"
source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Seattle massage parlor raid results in 26 happy endings
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun March 10, 2019
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Houston voters demanded that firefighters be paid as much as police. Step 1: Fire ten percent of fire fighters
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Remember Emma who asked for a letter from your dog? More than 35 police departments responded, bringing dogs to her house for a snuggle. More than 50,000 letters received. Bonus pics of Emma getting some puppy love
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBAL Baltimore)
 
 
 
Come and see the violence inherent in the system as MD legislature forcibly ejects a woman who is trying to protect civilian oversight over police regulation of civil rights
source: wbal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(6ABC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Demons made her do it
source: 6abc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
Focus fire focus is fired fire fighter living with mom
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 09, 2019
(WFSB Connecticut)
 
 
 
Subway unexpectedly tries out new bag of fentanyl, cookie and a drink promotion with their $5 footlong
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Freaked Out Guy)
 
 
 
78-year-old meth dealer tells police he's been dealing it for 20 years, had never been caught. Heisenberg approves
source: nowhabersham.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kent Online)
 
 
 
You can get pretty much anything you need from DIY stores these days. Lawnmowers, timber, electrical fittings, cocaine, power tools... wait, back up one
source: kentonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Missouri woman may get to receive her Oscar while wearing prison jumpsuit, leg irons
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man uses refrigerator to try and smuggle 10 Vietnamese nationals into UK. Definitely not cool
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man uses refrigerator to try and smuggle 10 Vietnamese nationals into UK. Definitely not cool
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
A good mom will stand up for you no matter what. A great mom will threaten Dominos staff with a handgun when they forget your hot wings
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 08, 2019
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
There are times when a man should be allowed to tell the police to fark off. Being searched for marijuana while dying in the hospital with stage 4 pancreatic cancer is certainly one of them. He had his phone so there is a video
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
The indictments we've all been expecting just happened
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
The indictments we've all been expecting just happened
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Angry drive-thru customer storms Taco Bell, makes own food in kitchen. On a related note, his toilet will also soon be storming
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Woman shoots boyfriend with shotgun, historically known as old-time home remedy for sleep apnea
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Woman shoots boyfriend with shotgun, historically known as old-time home remedy for sleep apnea
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Man shoots himself in leg in diner parking lot. When asked about the restaurant and his prognosis, he replied, "IHOP"
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Jim Boeheim ruled not reckless in a fatal car crash in Syracuse. Apparently the victim who had gotten out of a car on the freeway had not established position in the paint
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Jim Boeheim ruled not reckless in a fatal car crash in Syracuse. Apparently the victim who had gotten out of a car on the freeway had not established position in the paint
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
New seafood fraud investigation shows one in three businesses sold mislabeled fish. Which raises the question: What does a police officer have to do wrong to get demoted to doing seafood fraud?
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kark.com)
 
 
 
Arkansas stand-your-ground law narrowly fails after State Senator's indignant outburst. It's news, it's Kark.com
source: kark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Man struck in head with hatchet at Taco Bell will now be oozing from both ends
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Family wants to demolish the "I'm a torso" Murder House
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Prospective buyer of iPhone pulls fake gun on seller in bank parking lot, seller pulls real gun. Obvious tag subbing in for Dumbass tag, who's in the back of an ambulance to the hospital
source: everettwa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Newt Gingrich wants science to solve the opioid crisis
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Attention, police officers: Using law enforcement databases as personal dating apps will not reflect favorably on your job evaluations
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WXYZ Detroit)
 
 
 
Detroit mayor calls 30 minute 911 response times outliers. After all, most people have to wait a couple of hours
source: wxyz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ruidoso News)
 
 
 
Because its the 1870s again, a Texas man has been arrested for cattle rustling
source: ruidosonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Maybe if it said Budweisest he would have gotten away with it
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu March 07, 2019
(Guardian)
 
 
 
It's official. British soldiers can once again commit crimes
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
If it weren't for all that porn, we wouldn't have all these stabbings
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Man rides away on police Segway while his girlfriend steals their PepperBall gun. Paul Blart reportedly on the case
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
Burglar pretends to be witness to his crime, tries helpful "they went that way" move on police. Cue sad trombone sound. With kind-of-sad cop-cam video goodness
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(1011 Now Lincoln)
 
 
 
Police politely ask lit up man to stop lighting bottle rockets in front of his home. Jailarity ensues
source: 1011now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Beachfront wedding gets a well deserved Florida tag
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
If you're the guy who entered an Oakland coffee shop and stole 10 laptops from customers at gunpoint, the police would like a word. In other news, laptops at coffee shops are now targets for theft
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
I'm Eric tells about the time a nice policeman ripped a patch off his uniform and thanked Eric for ... some reason
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCPO Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Officers had responded to Taylor's house earlier Wednesday night because she had stopped taking "prescribed psychiatric medication and was acting unusual." Which would explain the stolen police SUV & the three state car chase
source: wcpo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCPO Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Officers had responded to Taylor's house earlier Wednesday night because she had stopped taking "prescribed psychiatric medication and was acting unusual." Which would explain the stolen police SUV & the three state car chase
source: wcpo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Observer & Eccentric)
 
 
 
If you're high on pot and 15 Xanax while on probation, you may not want to start banging on a strangers door at 5:30 in the morning
source: hometownlife.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Police make shocking discovery after screams from beyond the grave are heard coming from cemetery, find living man (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Olive Garden waitress saves children from abusive parents. Amazingly the abuse wasn't because they brought the kids to Olive Garden
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Man gets lead poisoning after aiming his wallet at police and shouting 'I have a gun'
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Man gets lead poisoning after aiming his wallet at police and shouting 'I have a gun'
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
A Florida police officer who fatally shot a man for the crime of 'being stranded while black' has gotten a promotion and raise. Nah, just kidding. He's looking at life in prison. Florida tag too busy being shot at
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
Watch this thief steal over $100,000 of jewelry from KMart. No, I didn't misplace a decimal point
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WANE Ft. Wayne)
 
 
 
A rare truthful apology from a convicted person speaking to the victims in court: "Sorry for being a piece of shiat"
source: wane.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
"I am not a police officer but should be considered one." And it didn't work
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
If you work in a bar in Arlington, VA, and your name is Angela, your life is about to become a whole lot more complicated
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
Patient steals ambulance, winds up as patient in another ambulance
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
It's sometimes hard to tell if the people next door are running an illegal drug house or an illegal dentist office
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
It's sometimes hard to tell if the people next door are running an illegal drug house or an illegal dentist office
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Today's racist hate crime is pollen
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed March 06, 2019
(Dark Horizons)
 
 
 
It's official, next season is the last for Oliver-Hood-Arrow-Green Arrow-R'as al Ghul-Mayor-international assassin-inmate-bratva mobster-breakfast chef-police officer-Queen. Man. This show's kinda been insane
source: darkhorizons.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Best time to go on a crime spree: shortly after your death
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Best time to go on a crime spree: shortly after your death
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
It's an "Oakland thing," and by that you mean trying to honor a loved one that passed away by trying to kill other people by throwing $20 bills out onto the freeway on the way home from the funeral
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
GWB: Gardening While Black
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
Police revive driver with 10 doses of Narcan, meaning he gets the next overdose for free
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
Amazon delivery driver parks in a handicap spot outside of St. Louis area Target, becomes a target for enraged motorist with a gun
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Federal agents raid Harvey police department in a vain attempt to find that gigantic invisible rabbit
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Federal agents raid Harvey police department in a vain attempt to find that gigantic invisible rabbit
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when you finally get your stolen ATM out to the parking lot then find your getaway driver has already left
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
Police stop truck at NJ rest stop that had enough fentanyl to kill everybody in NJ. So close, so close
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WYMT Hazard)
 
 
 
Kentucky man accused of stealing $75,000 of beef from his employer. One thing that is known is that he definitely wasn't working at White Castle
source: wkyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Arizona prosecutor: Uber is not liable in deadly crash of self-driving car ...oh and that back-up driver may face charges
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
I guess the bigger question is, who waits 45 minutes for Taco Bell?
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 Now Fort Myers)
 
 
 
Florida doctor likes to buy his lube at CVS because that's where he also conveniently prints his child pornography photos
source: fox4now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHO TV Des Moines)
 
 
 
Video shows what happens to a police officer when he's exposed to fentanyl
source: whotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Two sisters murder their father in what the local sheriff called a "perfect" crime. Then things get all Floridy
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
There's a lot to unpack in this headline
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Officer.com)
 
 
 
Broke, a Kentucky sheriff in Appalachian coal country struggles to provide law and order. Subby knows there's a country song for this heartbreak
source: officer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Apparently a bobcat weighs more than a pedestrian. It must be a witch
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue March 05, 2019
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Is that a $ 4,000 bottle of Remy Martin liquor in your pants or are you just glad to see me?
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Just goes to show you: never try and steal a car after a fresh snow
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Plucky star from 'School of Rock' charged with felony guitar theft. Maybe he can pull some strings
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Park your car on the street near NYPD's flag football game? That's a towin'
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Former president of a College Republicans organization gets arrested for excessive free speech
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Humble man pleads guilty to murdering his wife; no longer believes he's perfect in every way
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Rocket launcher found in Florida Man's luggage at Pennsylvania airport. Or as Florida calls it, outreach
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Masturbating school bus grandpa strikes again
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Sometimes, a long-term problem will solve itself, as was the case with this man and his backyard lion breeding program
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DW)
 
 
 
Man loses Picasso on train. He shouldn't worry about it, any five-year-old can make him another one
source: dw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 Now Fort Myers)
 
 
 
Florida man's arrest report checks nearly all the keywords: ☑ Child neglect - ☑ Illegal alien - ☑ Drunk - ☑ Ramen Noodles - ☐ Alligator
source: fox4now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 15 Madison)
 
 
 
Happy Meal toys were much better back when I was a kid, although this one is perfectly functional
source: nbc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 15 Madison)
 
 
 
Happy Meal toys were much better back when I was a kid, although this one is perfectly functional
source: nbc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
P.U.T.W.B. - Picking Up Trash while Black is the latest thing police need to be involved with in Boulder, CO
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Well, no Sacramento police officers will face charges for the shooting of an unarmed man name Stephon Clark, but at least 80 people so far who have a problem with that, including 3 clergy members, will
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Latest LA. police chase has LAPD arresting vigilante who attempted his own P.I.T. maneuver on pursuit suspect
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Latest LA. police chase has LAPD arresting vigilante who attempted his own P.I.T. maneuver on pursuit suspect
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Mother of first 'Make a Wish' child looks back on her son's legacy
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon March 04, 2019
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Oh, nothing, just another responsible gun owner. On horseback. Drunk. Riding through a cemetery. In Virginia. Shooting at the person who tells her she can't ride there
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
Video
 
Subby is drunk and just saw a moose looking in his second story window
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Infrastructure Week has been replaced with 'Hire a lawyer' week
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Collider)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Arrow, Ollie offers Emiko the keys to the zipline network and totally not Suicide Squad has a mission. (CW 8ET) Later, on Black Lightning, Anissa goes a long way for a booty call. (CW 9ET)
source: collider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
"I just stabbed my mother to death" "Ma'am, this is an Olive Garden"
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
If you're the vandal responsible for hammering off the heads of two statues in Montclair, the police would like you to stop. It's not hammer time
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Twenty horses have died in two months at the Santa Anita Racetrack in California. Stumped local police brought in outside detectives who quickly found the most likely cause: a 30 foot moat filled with sulphuric acid at the end of the track
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Outlander actor stabbed at poetry reading
source: scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
"Duct-Taped Baby Turtles" is also the name of my alternative 80's synth-pop cover band
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Social media trolls attacking Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle may find themselves facing police inquiries (possible nsfw content on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
'Masked person walks into Davenport credit union, looks around, immediately runs out' Guess he realized he was in Davenport
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
'Masked person walks into Davenport credit union, looks around, immediately runs out' Guess he realized he was in Davenport
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
"The caller thought it was suspicious since panda bears are not native to the Badger State"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun March 03, 2019
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Remember that story of the woman who gave money to a panhandler at a traffic light and got stabbed to death for her trouble? About that
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charlotte Observer)
 
 
 
Man with sword shot by police after jumping from burning house. There can be only one. Also, how is this not Florida?
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Decatur Herald-Review)
 
 
 
The Herald & Review: Reporting the news other sites are afraid to cover
source: herald-review.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Now that's what you call job security
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
It never looks good when your unfaithful wife dies under mysterious circumstances and police find the phrase, "what happened to cheating spouses in historic Aztec tribes" in your browser's search engine
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
He wouldn't mark it Zero
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
"You need to move." "No, you need to move." "I'm not moving. You need to." "No, you do." "No, you do." "No, you do." "No, you do." "No, you do." "Not me." SERENITY NOW
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat March 02, 2019
(Manchester Evening News)
 
 
 
Manchester beer festival saved from the indignity of being cancelled due to the venue not having a liquor license
source: manchestereveningnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 25 Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
In the dictionary, next to the word Enabler, there's a picture of this girl's mother
source: okcfox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 25 Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Alabama man allegedly tries to make his mom taste the heat, not the meat
source: okcfox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 25 Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Alabama man allegedly tries to make his mom taste the heat, not the meat
source: okcfox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The more things change, the more they (sadly) stay the same
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Channel 3000 Madison)
 
 
 
Let he who hasn't laced his stepfather's Red Bull with drugs normally reserved for use on pregnant cows throw the first stone
source: channel3000.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri March 01, 2019
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
If you aren't handicapped, don't park in a handicapped space. In front of a sheriffs office. With stolen items in your car
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
If you aren't handicapped, don't park in a handicapped space. In front of a sheriffs office. With stolen items in your car
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Shoot your son four times because he drank your vodak? That will be two years probation and a $657 fine, officer
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida School Resource Officer arrested for child porn. On the bright side, they took away his gun before he could go off with a bang
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The world's most hated band finally gets the respect they deserve
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
GOP just had a massive arrow fall out of their quiver
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
GOP just had a massive arrow fall out of their quiver
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Today's recipe for 'Toasted Tesla X on the Bay' requires some fairly expensive ingredients
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Ow, I shot my balls
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
It doesn't get any more Atlanta than this
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
The new threat that is going to kill you and your children -- deranged, dimensionally challenged advertising
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Federal Bureau of Investigation)
 
 
 
FBI Vault releases Kushner Company's records
source: vault.fbi.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
"The friend struggled to describe what was happening to the interviewer, confusing the word vagina with Virginia during a separate interview with police." Either he needs remedial biology or geography
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Insurance Journal)
 
 
 
There's driving drunk and hitting a car, but you're really upping your game when you hit 41 cars. In a row
source: insurancejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Why would you call the police on a five-year-old? Oh, yeah. (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
An inFURiated New York City can finally rest, stolen bodega kitten reunited with 10-year-old autistic boy
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Skier busted with needle in his arm during anti-doping raid in Austria (w/video)
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Man fakes kidnapping to avoid paying Super Bowl bet. Bonus: I can totally see William H. Macy playing him in the movie
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Fox. Cops. Ops. Shots. Fox in copse. Cops stalk fox. Fox shocks cops, cop hops and flops. Shot from cop's flop blocked and stopped. Fox caught shot from cop and dropped
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Scotland Police warn of rise in 'sectarianism and consistently thuggish behaviour' at football matches. Oh for the good old days when Scottish football was all about mild bigotry and inconsistently thuggish behaviour
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Scotland Police warn of rise in 'sectarianism and consistently thuggish behaviour' at football matches. Oh for the good old days when Scottish football was all about mild bigotry and inconsistently thuggish behaviour
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
BYU police get caught stealing records from private county police database to hand over to the school to punish sexual assault victims and possibly get them expelled
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Teed off woman takes golf club to ATM
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu February 28, 2019
(CNBC)
 
 
 
To help prove he's really a right and upstanding citizen, Robert Kraft hires a lawyer who is close friends of Brett 'The Keg' Kavanaugh
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKBN Youngstown)
 
 
 
(o ) (°)
source: wkbn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Headline: "How Patriots owner Robert Kraft could get off in prostitution case." Are we not doing phrasing anymore?
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Area man accused of threatening his family ends hours-long standoff with police after being offered a slice of pizza
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Area man accused of threatening his family ends hours-long standoff with police after being offered a slice of pizza
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFGO Fargo)
 
 
 
The man wasn't semi-loaded with Oreos, he stole a Semi, loaded with Oreos
source: kfgo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Bibi booked
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Seriously, who steals fire trucks from the station?
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed February 27, 2019
(Investigative Post)
 
 
 
Congratulations, Buffalo, on your status as the nation's happening new driving-while-black revenue-generation hotspot
source: investigativepost.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Ford wins 2019's J.D. Power award for best cargo storage. Be sure to check out the Methstang, the Methsplorer and the all-new Meth-150
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
More than three dozen people hospitalized following chemical spill at water utility company in Alabama. Toxic avenger reboot?
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
Any idiot can drive around down railroad crossing gates with lights flashing warning you not to do it. It takes a true fan of Darwin to ignore the warning and get hit by not one, but two commuter trains
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Get in the zone at Auto-Zone. Whoa whoa whoa, not that in the zone
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pocono Record)
 
 
 
After receiving a backpack of rabbiatchow instead of marijuana, someone finds the need to call the police and fabricate an armed robbery story
source: poconorecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Protip: Don't park in front of a fire hydrant...ever
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Protip: Don't park in front of a fire hydrant...ever
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
In the Fark writing system, the readers are represented by two separate yet important groups: the writers, who write stories; and the critics, who mock them. These are their stories, and this is your Fark Writer's Thread, Justice for All edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
As Korea and Vietnam veterans keep passing away from old age, families keep finding the live grenades they brought home as trophies
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
And I would have gotten away with it too. If it wasn't for those pesky underpants
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
2016: Illegal immigrants are child rapists and should be in custody. 2019: Illegal child immigrants are being raped in US custody
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(East Bay Times)
 
 
 
We investigated ourselves and we're not going to tell you a damn thing about our last 12,000 wrongdoers who we couldn't clear
source: eastbaytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KnoxNews)
 
 
 
Surprisingly nutty
source: amp.knoxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Police inform suspect arrested for DUI that warrantless roadside blood draws are mandatory. Courts: The police were mistaken, but we'll let it slide and allow the evidence since their hearts were in the right place
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Attention parents - - For seemingly the 100th time, DO NOT drive a car with your child sitting on your lap
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue February 26, 2019
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
Woman tells police she was watching television when her cable-TV service was interrupted. You can imagine where it goes from here. Well, no, you probably can't
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
In the tawny, luxury hipster paradise of Brooklyn, New York, there's still a five-block area that's so far back on the gentrification curve that you can still get shot if you hang out for, on average, 88.6 days
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
It wouldn't be Fark without another naked burglar story: "The first thing that hits me is the smell. Sewer mixed with vomit mixed with B.O. mixed with dirty feet. Yeah, it made my eyes water"
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
New York's "kayak killer" is back in the water
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Things are not looking so sunny for Hall of Fame WWF wrestler-turned-porn actress arrested on her 6th drunk driving charge
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Ex-NJ schools chief in public defecation scandal wants to keep his name in the news
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Plainclothes police officer planning to argue he "stood his ground" against a stranded motorist he shot dead after the motorist pulled a concealed gun when the officer failed to identify himself, and kept firing AFTER motorist threw away his gun
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Chicago's living and dead to vote for one of 14 mayoral candidates today
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Virginia bill to ban handheld cellphone use while driving fails on account of lawmakers' concerns that police would use it as an excuse for racial profiling. What, by only pulling over Boost users?
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Wedding crasher caught on video stealing box of cards. This sequel sucks
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
What rolls down stairs / Alone or in pairs, / And over your neighbor's dog? / What smashes your nose / And bloodies your clothes? / It's log, log, log
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon February 25, 2019
(WANE Ft. Wayne)
 
 
 
How good was the sex work at that Florida spa? According to Robert Kraft, so good it was worth being there the morning of the AFC championship game, and then fly to Kansas City and hope to catch the game
source: wane.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CityLab)
 
 
 
'Broken windows' theory implies that the environment leads to crime. But maybe we should be focusing on the social networks of the small minority that are responsible for most serious crimes
source: citylab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lehigh Valley Live)
 
 
 
Apparently slapping someone and screaming racial slurs at them is wrong now
source: lehighvalleylive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
It's sad to pay respects to a loved one who's passed away and then be killed by a speeding car right outside the funeral home, but you really do have to admit the convenience factor
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
It's sad to pay respects to a loved one who's passed away and then be killed by a speeding car right outside the funeral home, but you really do have to admit the convenience factor
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHAM Rochester)
 
 
 
Ogden Police Sgt. Travis Gray earned himself a lifetime of steaks by rescuing a dog that fell through the ice
source: 13wham.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
A Charleston officer is under investigation for kindly helping a man with eight broken ribs and a punctured liver to fill out and sign his form refusing medical treatment
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Bangladesh plane hijacker shot dead by special forces. Torque helped with the bullet, friction took care of the organs and gravity did the rest
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS San Francisco)
 
 
 
These men of genius planned to fence a camera marked KPIX 5 somehow
source: sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Katie Price found 'very drunk' after crash. Good thing she's equipped with airbags
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Ahead of the Trump-Kim summit, Vietnam gets an unwanted lesson on the Streisand effect
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
A 24-year-old man was killed Saturday evening when the snowmobile he was riding in Florida went out of control and struck a tree. Palm tree?
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
You know that time you had a make out session to Barry White? Yeah, but not in the back of a police car
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sun February 24, 2019
(KMPH San Joaquin Valley)
 
 
 
Two hundred bee hives stolen from a California almond orchard. Police hope to catch thieves using a sting operation
source: kmph.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(West Central Tribune)
 
 
 
This little piggy went to the market. This little piggy stayed home. This little piggy was an IED in the back of a Sovereign Citizen's RV in a grocery store parking lot
source: wctrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(West Central Tribune)
 
 
 
This little piggy went to the market. This little piggy stayed home. This little piggy was an IED in the back of a Sovereign Citizen's RV in a grocery store parking lot
source: wctrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
If my math is correct, this works out to around $63 an hour, which ain't too bad all things considered. Well, okay, maybe there are some things to consider after all
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press-Enterprise (So. Cal))
 
 
 
Weedlord taken into custody. Police attempting to confirm suspect's last name
source: pe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook