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152 headlines found matching 'plans'
Sat January 20, 2018
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Mike Tyson says he plans to get his squandered fortune back selling marijuana, first wants to know where he can buy some cheap
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri January 19, 2018
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
If at first you don't convict, try, try again
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Make Use Of)
 
 
 
Apple plans to let users do what they should have let users do in the first place
source: makeuseof.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 18, 2018
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Noting that it seemed be the thing that made people the most angry about the LAST shutdown, the Trump administration will keep national park and monuments open if there is a shutdown-just without any staff. What could possibly go wrong?
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed January 17, 2018
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Speed camera placed at strategic work zone on the Capital Beltway produces almost 75,000 tickets and $3 million of safety during the last six months of 2017
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Crunch)
 
 
 
Beleaguered podcast pioneer TWiT is suing Twitter, alleging breach of contract and copyright infringement for expanding into audio and video content
source: techcrunch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon January 15, 2018
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Army vet sues VA over scalpel left in body after surgery. VA plans counter-suit for theft and unauthorized possession of government property
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun January 14, 2018
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Jeff Flake plans on making a speech comparing Trump to Stalin
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat January 13, 2018
(CNN)
 
 
 
20-year-old man wins $450 million jackpot. Future plans include losing it all, going back to McDonald's in a couple of years
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 11, 2018
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Just gotta get rid of those human drivers
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed January 10, 2018
(Talk Radio (UK))
 
 
 
Ever been so frustrated by a train delay that you wanted to make a bomb threat against the rail network? Well if you live in the UK we've got good news for you
source: talkradio.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Congressional Republicans considering saving $6 billion by greenlighting a second remake of the adventures of Ponch
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
There is a statistical tie between Arpaio and his opponent in the Senate race
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 New Orleans)
 
 
 
Intoxicated driver crashed his vehicle and sent another to the hospital with injuries. The condition of the hospitalized vehicle is unknown
source: fox8live.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue January 09, 2018
(Tech Crunch)
 
 
 
Kodak announces plans for a photograph-based ICO, stock jumps 44% as cryptolemmings continue to look for a cliff to drive the economy over
source: techcrunch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
Senate Democrats lay out their plans to save net neutrality from the horrible FCC decision. Forty senators have signed on as of now with more coming
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Radar Magazine)
 
 
 
Artie Lange's next book: Too Ill to Rehab
source: radaronline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun January 07, 2018
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Michael Moore threatens to start fracking offshore close to Mar-a-Lago. He even has a nice photo of the fracking truck he's going to use. The truck he plans to use for his offshore drilling
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri January 05, 2018
(AP News)
 
 
 
Cousins of Anarchy
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Woman plans to marry Tetris after relationship with calculator breaks down. Apparently, the problems kept multiplying and after a while things just didn't add up
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
GOP leaders meet at Camp David today to discuss Trump's future impact to the party
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
GM animals will be sold in England. Ford and Chrysler animals coming soon
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 04, 2018
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Ajit Pai won't make a public appearance in front of the plebes, citing security concerns
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Screen Rant)
 
 
 
Robin Hood is being updated again for modern times. Based on the images, he's robbing the Death Star plans from the rich and giving them to the Bothans
source: screenrant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed January 03, 2018
(JamBase)
 
 
 
Plans for 50th anniversary Woodstock concert in 2019 move ahead thanks to government and corporate grants
source: jambase.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue January 02, 2018
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Some Oregon residents may have to *gasp* pump their own gas
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon January 01, 2018
(NASDAQ)
 
 
 
Air Force is moving ahead with plans to test helicarriers. Where the heck is my flying 1962 red Chevrolet Corvette convertible?
source: nasdaq.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun December 31, 2017
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
David Bowie's son Duncan starts a book club to read and discuss his father's favorite books
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Nepal bans Everest climbers who were really just Everest passengers being carried up by Sherpas
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri December 29, 2017
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
And nothing of value was lost
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed December 27, 2017
(Digital Trends)
 
 
 
Seagate once again gives porn collectors a reason to rejoice
source: digitaltrends.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Ridley Scott is not happy about Blade Runner 2049, will soon announce plans for a remake which will be the definitive final super special director's cut
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue December 26, 2017
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
An invitation to the royal wedding could be bad news. For Obama
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun December 24, 2017
(Washington Free Beacon)
 
 
 
Trump: last week; "I don't watch the news" Trump Today: "..networks were saying, 'Will he keep his promise, and will he sign it [Tax bill] before Christmas?'"
source: freebeacon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri December 22, 2017
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Steve Bannon and Corey Lewandowski have been informed by the House Intelligence Committee not to make any plans for early next year
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The 2017 Fark The Poor Act is now officially law
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 21 Harrisburg)
 
 
 
"Reason for the season? Gettysburg HOA says Jesus sign must go"
source: local21news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Oh noes, so you're telling me big Hollywood hitman Robert De Niro is not really as big of a tough guy as he thinks he is
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu December 21, 2017
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Shoulder driving coming to I-90. Jeez, and I get pulled over when I try to drive with my feet
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida man accused of stealing $26,000 in gold bars from kitty litter box. Before you mock, ask yourself-when was the last time you dug through someone else's litter box looking for gold?
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed December 20, 2017
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Nashville might not win Amazon's headquarters, however they did score a Shake Shack
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
President Tone Deaf plans to sign his "Middle-Class Tax Cut" into law at the exclusive Mar-a-Lago Resort. Tired of all that winning yet?
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Trump asks Americans, 'How's your 401(k)?' Here's the real answer
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue December 19, 2017
(Blabbermouth)
 
 
 
That one guy from the band Pantera that you've never heard of plans to record an album of covers, probably of songs you've never heard of
source: blabbermouth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AsiaOne)
 
 
 
Who is more stupid? The police for tweeting out their plans to arrest a spy in a few days or the spy who still got caught?
source: asiaone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
For want of a vote, the seat was lost. For want of a seat, the legislature was lost. For want of the legislature, plans for a new Constitutional Convention were lost. And all for the want of a single extra Republican voter in Tidewater, Virginia
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Charlottesville police chief retires, plans to open Tiki bar
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon December 18, 2017
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Have any plans to eat placenta over the holidays? You might want to read this first. And also not do that
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Trump Judicial nominee Matthew Petersen withdraws his nomination; plans to spend time at home doing legal research to find out what battery is and if he claim it against Sen. Kennedy for tearing him a new one
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun December 17, 2017
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Marvin Lewis says "fark it" and plans to leave
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BGR)
 
 
 
Another reason to stay indoors this winter? Netflix has 31 new original shows and movies premiering in January - here's the full list
source: bgr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KQED San Francisco)
 
 
 
White House special counsel Ty Cobb denies rumor that Trump plans to fire Mueller before Christmas. "As the White House has consistently said for months, there is no consideration of firing the special counsel"
source: ww2.kqed.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri December 15, 2017
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Democrat plans to use little-known power that allows minority party to force a Congressional vote on Net Neutrality
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue December 12, 2017
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
The US and Venezuela spar over Maduro's banning of opposition political parties, with Trump's people demanding detailed notes on how Maduro plans to get away with it
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon December 11, 2017
(CTV News)
 
 
 
China announces plans to recreate Shakespeare's birthplace of Stratford-upon-Avon. Next: will announce plans to recreate Charles Dickens' birthplace, Walt Whitman's birthplace, Stephanie Meyer's birthplace
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu December 07, 2017
(CNN)
 
 
 
Dollar General plans to open 900 new stores after market research indicates that once Trump implodes the economy, the market will surge for nearly expired off-brand foods, cheap crap from China, and factory-second socks and underwear
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Roll Call)
 
 
 
Trent Franks was apparently showing his Frank to people he shouldn't and is resigning from Congress
source: rollcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
White House blames Trump's slurring of words during yesterdays's speech on Jerusalem on "a dry throat". Which is apparently what the kids are calling "a cognitive impairment brought on by occluded cerebral blood flow" these days
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed December 06, 2017
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Emergency UN Security Council meeting called to discuss all the ways that Trump is a blithering idiot
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Kansas' Kris Kobach plans to steal democracy by putting everyone into one big voter database that can easily be hacked by the likes of Russia and purge any non-Trump fans from voter rolls
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue December 05, 2017
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Chinese urban planners switch to plan B with ten lane thoroughfare after stubborn apartment block owner halts progress by refusing to sell
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon December 04, 2017
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Florida man arrested for drawing school shooting on son's homework. No charges in connection with the crap drawn on his face
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Eli Manning plans on playing next season. Let's put bets on where that is
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Arizona State makes a commitment to play to win the game
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat December 02, 2017
(Spaceflight Now)
 
 
 
What will the rich do with all that extra tax cut cash? Elon Musk plans on launching a luxury automobile to Mars
source: spaceflightnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri December 01, 2017
(RedState)
 
 
 
For those upset over "the miscarriage of justice" and making plans to boycott San Francisco over the Kate Steinly verdict, you should read this legal analysis from the progressive, liberal website RedState
source: redstate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Tennessee Vols pursuing Mike Leach for coaching position, in hopes that an entire fan base can be locked in an electrical closet
source: cougcenter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu November 30, 2017
(CNN)
 
 
 
State Department spokesman admits on the record that Tillerson was lying when he said there was no morale issue
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
GOP preparation plans for a government shutdown have already gone through the letters A-G
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Amazon HQ2 is not coming to Colorado but something far better is
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Trump ➡ Stone ➡ NY Radio DJ ➡ WikiLeaks ➡ GRU ➡ Putin
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed November 29, 2017
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Trump plans to put national parks in the pool
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue November 28, 2017
(Politico)
 
 
 
So Trump is going to campaign for Moore
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Fine. Let it pass. Let it puff-puff-pass. So long as it's taxed like my whiskey, so that their weed taxes can pay for my future liver operation, like my booze taxes can pay for their future lung cancer treatments, then fine
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Björk plans follow up version of Utopia with more flutes. Subby prefers cowbell
source: themuse.jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun November 26, 2017
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Judge postpones sentencing fashion model, who smashed glass into woman's face when denied entry to nightclub's VIP area, because... she's a rich white girl who absolutely must keep her holiday vacation plans (possible nsfw content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu November 23, 2017
(Great Falls Tribune)
 
 
 
Punchable white nationalist banned from 26 western European countries. It's a start
source: greatfallstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed November 22, 2017
(WGNO)
 
 
 
For your Thanksgiving leftover plans: Bacon Stuffing Donuts
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Corporation with big plans for any water found on Mars sending experiment to International Space Station on next resupply mission. Fark: It's Budweiser, and you better believe they have a mission patch
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue November 21, 2017
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Just like that annoying coworker, Google encroaches on Apple Danish
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
The only thing remotely surprising about this is Ajit Pai has taken this long to begin gutting Net Neutrality. Maybe he was waiting for the check(s) to clear?
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
If you're white and on welfare, Trump is coming for you, too
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun November 19, 2017
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Remember the lady with the "fark Trump" sticker? Well after getting arrested by the sheriff, she escalates the feud by assuring she will be arrested daily from now until the sheriff is out of office
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
If you had any plans of saying the stupidest thing this week, you just might want to save it for next Sunday
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri November 17, 2017
(Billboard)
 
 
 
Warped Tour to have its final full-sized run in 2018, plans to become the Slightly Disfigured Tour starting in 2019
source: billboard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu November 16, 2017
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Headline: Senators introduce bipartisan gun background check bill. Actuality: Would require states and agencies to produce plans for sending records to the NICS and "try" to hold their bonuses if they don't do their job
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Fark could be offline forever as early as next month, thanks to the FCC
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed November 15, 2017
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Plus-size retailer goes belly up after expansion
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Lamborghini delivers a special edition white-and-gold Huracan built just for Pope Francis, who autographed the hood and then sent it to an auction house to raise money for charities helping Iraqi Christians, sick kids in Africa, and migrant women
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat November 11, 2017
(Texas Observer)
 
 
 
Secret plans for Trump's wall show it being built through churches, wildlife refuges, state parks, graveyards, and an RV resort
source: texasobserver.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri November 10, 2017
(CBC)
 
 
 
Pro football team under pressure to change ethnically controversial nickname. No not that one, or that one
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
"TweakerCam" creator gets ten percent of vote in write-in campaign, plans to start a political action committee. See how bad drugs are? Just putting them on camera turned him into a political junkie
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue November 07, 2017
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Starbucks plans to open Italian restaurants, so if you've been craving overpriced pizzas that taste like burning, you're in luck
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon November 06, 2017
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Catwoman and boyfriend charged again with assaulting each other. RAWR
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Stephen Hawking states that humanity has only about 600 years left before the Earth is turned into a sizzling fireball, says bring good steaks and marshmallows to the party
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Ridley Scott hints at the end of the Alien franchise, six films too late
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun November 05, 2017
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Today's privacy violation is brought to you by Colorado, in which a high school installed cameras in a bathroom
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat November 04, 2017
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Harrison Ford: "Today's greatest threat is not climate change, not pollution, not flood or fire. It's that we've got people in charge of important shiat who don't believe in science"
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri November 03, 2017
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Almirola replaces Danica as new 34th place car each week
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu November 02, 2017
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Trump plans to save BIG Coal by giving them an $11 billion dollar annual bailout, that will be paid by electric customers
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon October 30, 2017
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Elvira, mistress of the dark, to put on her final performance on Halloween
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Plans to name German high speed train after Anne Frank cause uproar, likely due to people worried about it disappearing somewhere in the Pacific Ocean
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Mobile ISP w/out Net Neutrality : "Access to Fark.com denied because you didn't buy our Not-News Unlimited Package". You've seen the joke before, but this ISP used it as a guide
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri October 27, 2017
(CNN)
 
NewsFlash
 
How do you keep an asshole in suspense for a weekend?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Paralyzed reporter walks again with the help of robotic exoskeleton, plans to clean up the streets of Detroit
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Newly-released JFK files reveal CIA tried to kill Castro in very strange ways, including bacteria-laden swimsuits and booby-trapped seashells
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu October 26, 2017
(CNN)
 
 
 
Saudi Arabia plans to build a $500 billion mega-city. Costs will break down to $1 billion for the buildings and $499 billion for the air conditioning
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed October 25, 2017
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Two people shot dead at Louisiana's Gambling State University. Oh, wait. Grambling. Subby has to change his higher education plans
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Trump: No changes to your 401k. House GOP: Say goodbye to your 401k
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Jake Tapper compares Trump to Joseph McCarthy; which makes sense as both went on ill-conceived witch hunts in an effort to prove a negative
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon October 23, 2017
(Gizmodo UK)
 
 
 
Low-rent British burger chain Wimpy won't give up Tuesday for a bankruptcy today, plans ambitious comeback to battle multinational fast-food giants with power of patriotism
source: gizmodo.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
WH Press Secretary wants to know what you will do with the $4k raise you will get from corporate tax cuts. Subby plans to buy a unicorn
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu October 19, 2017
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If you were wondering what it takes to stay looking young urine for a surprise
source: uk.style.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed October 18, 2017
(NFL)
 
 
 
*NFL throws a flag* Free speech interference, on the White House. Cannot force players to suppress speech, can only encourage dialog. 10 tweet penalty and loss of talking point. Replay down
source: nfl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stars and Stripes)
 
 
 
President Trump plans to disgrace the USS Arizona Memorial in November
source: stripes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
Wait, this is a crime? Sooo, this isn't just a Fark kink?? Well, there goes my plans for tonight
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue October 17, 2017
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Meanwhile, in Canadian politics, you may still operate a canoe under the influence of La Fin Du Monde
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Harvey Weinstein plans to keep making movies, because like Judge Judy, he can simply switch companies. Of course, Judge Judy isn't physically raping litigants, but hey
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Hope you didn't have plans for the 2024 total solar eclipse. Or the 2020 election Or the midterms. Or New Years Eve of this year. Or Christmas. Or Thanksgiving. Or maybe even Halloween. "Scary" tag not nearly scary enough
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Air Force general says "we'd be dumb not to fly" on SpaceX reused rockets. That sound you just heard was the retirement plans of thousands of colonels going splat
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon October 16, 2017
(Engadget)
 
 
 
One week after the Trump administration reversed the Clean Power Plan and vowed again to end the "war on coal", energy company Luminant announces plans to close three coal plants
source: engadget.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
White House memo shows they're as dumb as we think they are
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat October 14, 2017
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Does the world really need diet avocados?
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri October 13, 2017
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Microsoft set to unleash Cortana on Skype because she started to feel shunned and alone. Now she'll butt in and help you make plans and provide information. She won't be ignored
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
The rich receive more housing welfare than the poor, just as Jesus intended
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu October 12, 2017
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Southwest plans flights to Hawaii in their Boeing 737s, possibly creating a new level of Hell
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue October 10, 2017
(BBC)
 
 
 
In Sep 2016, Best Korean hackers stole US-SK war plans. Say what you will about the Moron-in-Chief, but at least with his 'make it up as I tweet' approach, there aren't any plans for them to steal
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Yankee activist Gene Stilp plans to burn Nazi-Confederate flag at Talladega Superspeedway this weekend. Having never been to Alabama before, he expects reception may be different than what he experienced in Delaware
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon October 09, 2017
(Salon)
 
 
 
Salon is concerned that Space X's plans to colonize Mars could end badly for the native Martians
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri October 06, 2017
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Goldman Sachs plans to brexit 1,000 employees to Frankfurt
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Yes, JP Morgan DOES have plans in place for how to keep the company running in the event of a nuclear war written into its bylaws, but NO they are not new and they don't know something we don't about North Korea...probably
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Would you eat the new McDonald's McVegan "burger?"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Someone finally told Trump what Tillerson said about him
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu October 05, 2017
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Plans for a Rob Ford memorial stadium staggered around then went up in a puff of smoke
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Not satisfied with just one pending nuclear war, Trump will "decertify" Iran deal next week
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed October 04, 2017
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
Conspiracy theorists and amateur criminal behavioral analysts forced to reset as news surfaces that the Vegas gunman appears to have originally planned to attack the "Life is Beautiful" festival headlined by Chance the Rapper a week earlier
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C-SPAN)
 
 
 
Will Rex make good on his plans and bail? Will he announce the bombings will begin in five minutes? Will we stay in NATO? Your guess is as good as mine. THIS is your impromptu Tillerson presser thread (link is live)
source: c-span.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
As if Las Vegas hasn't suffered enough, Trump plans visit to city today. No word what he'll be throwing to the crowds this time
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue October 03, 2017
(NBC News)
 
 
 
GM announces plans to go all electric over the next few years. Might be time to take some profit from those XOM shares your grandfather left you
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon October 02, 2017
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Rick Pitino is selling his house and plans to 'lay low' for a while. Good luck with that
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
Steve "Pinocchio" Mnuchin gets schooled on his tax plans by everyone's favorite crazy uncle, Bernie Sanders. 'Twas most glorious indeed
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun October 01, 2017
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
The British government cranks up its plans to build a tunnel under Stonehenge to eleven
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu September 28, 2017
(Politicus USA)
 
 
 
Rachel Maddow announces plans to trap Russian cyber spies by setting up a fake website dedicated to secession. Usually traps work better if you don't publicly announce them
source: politicususa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed September 27, 2017
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Rutgers plans on honoring Ohio State defensive coordinator Greg Schiano before Saturdays game and then kicking his you-know-what
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue September 26, 2017
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
Aerosmith canceled a handful of tour dates as Steven Tyler recovers from a undisclosed "unexpected medical issues." Unnamed sources state that it had nothing to do with Steven looking closely into a mirror
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
The DHS announces plans to collect "social media handles, aliases, associated identifiable information, and search results" from prospective immigrants to the US, Oh and Green card holders living in the US, oh, and naturalized citizens
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
If you had "Trump's attacks on NFL players protesting police brutality" as the reason an impeachment vote hits the House floor, come collect your prize: an Al Green autographed impeachment filing
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
May on new Brexit talks: Don't say that you love me, just tell me that you need me
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon September 25, 2017
(Thurrott)
 
 
 
Microsoft innovates again in Windows 10, plans to rename Windows Store app to "Microsoft Store" and alter its goofy icon to resemble actual Microsoft Store shopping bag
source: thurrott.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Trump claims ignorance, making this one of the few times he may be telling the truth
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Den Of Geek)
 
 
 
Much like everyone else, Terminator 6 will be pretending Genisys never happened
source: denofgeek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Australia announces plans to flee to space to escape the horrible fearsome wildlife that infests their country
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 

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