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272 headlines found matching 'person'
Sat April 30, 2016
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Hawaii denies Woody Harrleson a medical marijuana dispensary license. Probably a good move
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(n+1 Magazine)
 
 
 
What it feels like to work in the cut-throat startup industry: "Our primary investor has funded a direct competitor. This is what investors do, but it feels personal: Daddy still loves us, but he loves us less"
source: nplusonemag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Super self-aware Johnny Manziel defiantly tweets "You guys act like what I'm doing is something new" as he's "been the same person" and "doing the same things since it all started"
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CityLab)
 
 
 
Hey hipster, don't want to be a gentrifier? No dice: by existing, you're one of them, and there's nothing you can do besides displace someone and make inequality worse. So just accept your guilt and keep doing you
source: citylab.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 29, 2016
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Ryan Reynolds writes heartfelt letter as a tribute to young Deadpool fan who died of cancer
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNSNews)
 
 
 
Kirk Cameron says something ridiculous
source: cnsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man parks his car behind police van, raises his trunk to block the speed camera, celebrates by walking to the pub
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
Wichita police looking for a thief who stole $1,000 worth of Blue Man Suits. Includes helpful surveillance photo of suspect carrying Blue Man Laundry Basket
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 28, 2016
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore takes personal responsibility for his ethics probe. Just kidding, he blamed the gays for attacking his marriage
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Should people recieving welfare be allowed to spend it eating out in a restaurant or on liquor? How about in expensive stores like Nieman Marcus?
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
If you were on either JetBlue flight 583 or flight 584 on April 21, 2015, you don't know how lucky you are that you survived
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed April 27, 2016
(The Japan News)
 
 
 
Come for the discussion of dementia-driven popularity of personal liability insurance, stay for the cute pictograms of situations which such insurance would cover
source: the-japan-news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 26, 2016
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Fox and Friends host suggest Americans "vote by prayer" so "God can determine the best candidate"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Big Think)
 
 
 
Science explains tag
source: bigthink.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Italian Doctor who is set to make history by attempting a $20 million, 36-hr procedure involving 156 separate doctors and support personnel to transplant a human head says he originally got the idea from a Spider Man comic book
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Kid Rock's personal assistant killed in ATV accident on Rock's property. Early reports are saying he up jumped the boogie
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 25, 2016
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Microsoft and Google agree to drop mutual complaints against each other. Apparently they've settled their differences and given up on world domination, now being just satisfied with controlling half the money on the planet
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Priest convicted of sex crime in San Diego finds home in Oklahoma parish. You bet some people have a problem with this
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat April 23, 2016
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Pro Tip: When impersonating a cop, don't try to pull over a cop
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Paul Ryan says that he's a better Speaker of the House than John Boehner
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 22, 2016
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Fox News' Dr. Keith Ablow with advice on how to best hook up on Tinder
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Frederick News Post)
 
 
 
Cruz rally organizers to transgendered teen: Go be transgendered somewhere else
source: fredericknewspost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 21, 2016
(Polygon)
 
 
 
EVE Online developer's newest project is a First-Person Spreadsheet set in the EVE universe
source: polygon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
Purple Haze is an iconic song, but personally, I like when Prince performed his original work, Stairway to Heaven
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
You can drunk-drive all you want in your driveway in Michigan
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Rio's new Olympic bike path is a literal death trap
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
Robot interrogators found to be more effective in eliciting confessions than humans, but only if the person they're interrogating doesn't think they're a robot
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Have you ever worked in an industry, a company or position which conflicted with your personal values? Subby worked in health insurance and is glad to be far away from that now
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
If you happen to be in downtown Denver before Monday, you can take a selfie in the Iron Throne from "Game of Thrones" with pretty good impersonators of Daenerys Targaryen and Melisandre
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Prince's final message to the world was an enigmatic blank space
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
$1 subs at Jimmy John's today. That is all
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
New poll indicates the demographic most afraid of transgendered persons using the same bathroom as them is old white men
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
New measles outbreak spotted
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Man arrested for stealing sunglasses, moonshine, snacks, and deodorant from a Rite Aid. And also charged with being the living personification of a country song
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed April 20, 2016
(EurekAlert)
 
 
 
"To what degree does the excess death rate in people with alcohol use disorder (AUD) happen because of a predisposition in the person who develops AUD compared with the effects of the AUD itself?" Or what comes first, 'hold my beer' or 'watch this'?
source: eurekalert.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rare.us)
 
 
 
Dudes are you stoned yet for 4/20? I mean REALLY stoned? Cause you'll need to be for this weed brownie prank
source: rare.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Kelly Ripa is upset she was not personally notified by Disney that Michael Strahan was leaving her show, as now she can't reach the coffee creamer, which has always been on the top shelf
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Christ, what a Curt Schilling
source: 38pitches.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Bill would end position of Illinois lieutenant governor. Hey it's a start
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 19, 2016
(Daily Freeman)
 
 
 
24 year old flips out figuratively, tries to impersonate a Price Chopper manager. Police arrive, he flips out literally. He does not stick the landing
source: dailyfreeman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IMDB)
 
 
 
Happy Birthday to the only actor to appear with both John Wayne and Arnold
source: imdb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 18, 2016
(CNN)
 
 
 
Bill Clinton warns that Bernie Brahs will 'shoot every third person on Wall Street' instead of dealing with the situation discreetly, like Vince Foster
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
New study finds that a person's happiness is tied to the amount of money they have in their checking account. Which is why no one ever picks the smiley face to be the background design on their checks
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
An "informal rodeo" ends in a brawl involving 400 people, whips, and spurs. Surprisingly, everyone kept their clothes on
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox Sports)
 
 
 
As proof that people will buy almost anything, a person is selling some air from Kobe Bryant's last game. Fark: The current bid is over $13,000
source: foxsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun April 17, 2016
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"Almost every website, be it a newspaper or a personal blog, has struggled with comments. Controversial topics and anonymous commenters are especially prone to incivility. Perhaps this is why only about half of news sites provide for user comments"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 15, 2016
(Adweek)
 
 
 
In her off time, "Lily" of AT&T commercial fame documents plight of Syrian refugees, directs commercials for Cracker Barrel Mac and Cheese, stars in Farkers' personal fantasies
source: adweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
The brief and bizarre history of the first person shooter bot
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politicus USA)
 
 
 
John McCain, who has done more to embolden Tea Partiers than Samuel Adams, bemoans the deep divisions within the GOP
source: politicususa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Have you ever met anybody famous? Did you talk with them, or just see them in person somewhere, like a restaurant?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Today)
 
 
 
Scientists say there are six basic elements to making a good apology. And the first thing is to learn not to expect any of them to ever come out of the mouth of Donald Trump
source: today.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
Chicago Alderman says leave urban coyotes alone, let them take care of the rats
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 14, 2016
(Action A Go-Go)
 
Video
 
Everything you need to know about DOOM's open beta, a.k.a your first person tour through the current presidential primary
source: actionagogo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed April 13, 2016
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"Hey, you know what would be a great idea? Let's make the All Star Game home run derby jerseys look just like those fugleist uniforms ever, the 1970s brown and yellow Padres ones," said no sane person, ever
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(24/7 Wall Street)
 
 
 
If you want to be there in person to see the moment the proud Lakers franchise is handed over from an all time great to a 19-year-old best known for outing his teammate for cheating on his pop star fiance, it will cost you between two and six grand
source: 247wallst.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
One dead, two hurt after lawn mower towing wheelchair with another passenger on the hood is hit by truck. No word on who held the beer for them
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Woman witnesses motorcyclists punching a man on the ground in the middle of the road, so she stops and pulls out her gun. Then things get weird
source: lanesplitter.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 11, 2016
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Making three hole-in-ones on the same hole in the final round of the Masters is rare. However making one by banking your shot off an opponent's ball is just off the charts
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PsyBlog)
 
 
 
Here are eight ways to deal with passive-aggressive people at work. I went to a lot of trouble to find this link for you, but I don't think you appreciate that
source: spring.org.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Here's the city with the largest number of drunk women per capita
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(InsideNova)
 
 
 
Guy sneaks into a Five Guys burger joint in the middle of the night, makes himself a burger, chats on the phone, and leaves an amusing video which will likely soon be state's evidence
source: insidenova.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun April 10, 2016
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
President Obama is interviewed by Chris Wallace on Fox News, and is asked if he feels personally responsible for Donald Trump and Bernie Sanders. Hilarity ensues
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat April 09, 2016
(Missoulian)
 
 
 
"I'm scared on top of this utility pole. I'm going to puma pants"
source: missoulian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
NC congressman thinks the person standing up for gay people is a bully, rather than the people passing anti-LGBT laws
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 08, 2016
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
New sign for Civil War veterans buried in Billings cemetery. Personally I think displaying the sign would have been a better choice
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 07, 2016
(Metro)
 
 
 
How many people have you indirectly slept with?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deslidefied)
 
 
 
Remember back in the day when they had personal ads instead of online dating? Well New York Magazine has compiled a bunch of their best from the '80s and '90s
source: deslide.clusterfake.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed April 06, 2016
(Kens 5 San Antonio)
 
 
 
School cop provides WWE body slam lesson to 12-year-old girl
source: kens5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(India TV News)
 
 
 
Problem: TV personality commits well-publicized suicide. Solution: Ban ceiling fans
source: indiatvnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
If your weapon can easily be broken in half by the person you're trying to threaten with it, maybe you should reconsider your fight
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
A father covered in Nazi tattoos and who named his children Adolf Hitler and Arian Nation claims he is being unfairly singled out
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 05, 2016
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Can we all agree that Sarah Palin didn't deserve this and actually comes across as the better person in this exchange?
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Usually, when your prank video posted to social media ends up causing your own teammates to ice you out and the national media to blast you, you learn to lay low and ride it out. Clearly, D'Angelo Russell is not smart like that
source: national.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 04, 2016
(WNEM Saginaw)
 
 
 
It's National Hug a Newsperson Day, which is meaningless to those of us with restraining orders
source: wnem.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canberra Times)
 
 
 
Australian rugby games are still a great place to kick back in the sun and drink an entire quart of bourbon
source: canberratimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun April 03, 2016
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Ben Carson gives his best endorsement yet for his good 'friend' Trump: "Are there better people? Probably"
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(12News Phoenix)
 
 
 
Man plows into skateboarder with car, then stops to help the person he injured--only to get hit by another driver himself and the skateboarder trapped underneath a car
source: 12news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat April 02, 2016
(ABC News)
 
 
 
American mosque attacked, dozens reported injured
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 25 Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Don't like the legal drone surveying your neighbor's home? Shoot it out of the sky, because 'Murica, F*ck YEAH
source: okcfox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 01, 2016
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Hello. My name is Sue, Sue Magina. Is the governor available? I'd like to discuss my menstrual cycle
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Ontario teacher now up to 38 charges of sexual misconduct. That's almost 40 charges and that's terrible
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
NYC riders at Herald Square subway station discover that, yes, there are smells worse than drunken hobo piss
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 31, 2016
(CBS News)
 
 
 
While Amazon is still working out delivering small items with drones, Atlas has perfected delivering full sized inflatable slides right to your front yard using a Boeing 767
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
FBI Directory Comey will attend to the matter of interrogating Hillary... Personally
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
There's so drunk you text the wrong person, and then there's so drunk you have a text argument with yourself
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 30, 2016
(Morning Ticker)
 
 
 
New blood test could confirm whether a person had suffered a concussion or similar brain injury. Previous method of waiting to see their voting record was just too slow and unreliable
source: morningticker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 Atlanta)
 
 
 
33 cases of Whoppers stolen from Burger King driver's truck. Actual weight 9 pounds (before cooking)
source: fox5atlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Investors Business Daily)
 
 
 
Tax Filers Beware: Audit shows the IRS isn't protecting your personal information
source: investors.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Naming your dog 'Dash' could cause your bank to melt down
source: in.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Crain's Detroit)
 
 
 
You can now designate who gets control of your social media accounts after you die, at least if you lived in Michigan when you stopped living
source: crainsdetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon March 28, 2016
(Lima Ohio)
 
 
 
Police search for suspects in shooting at the G-Spot. Authorities report that they are having trouble locating them. Update: after some intense probing, cops finger their culprits
source: hometownstations.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(HelenaIR.com)
 
 
 
Woman selling fake meth sells to fake buyer
source: helenair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
$273 million Japanese research satellite disappears, leaving behind only a few bits of debris. Kim Jong Un to take credit for personally piloting the spacecraft that destroyed it in 3... 2... 1
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Man earning nearly $42,000 a month by impersonating US Presidential candidate Donald Trump says acting crazy, insulting people at gigs is good work if you can get it ...except for the crazy hair part
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Your lazy co-workers serve a really important purpose: making you look good by comparison
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Hey, shoot video of me skiing way off the trail, what could possibly go wrong?
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat March 26, 2016
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Microsoft in talks to buy Yahoo and its assets -- again. Instead of $45 billion offer that was rejected in 2008, firm now hopes to toss them a bag of benjamins, take it or leave it
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri March 25, 2016
(WISTV)
 
 
 
Spring has sprung, inspiring yet another southern girl to have sex with a dog and share the videos
source: wistv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Eating a Japanese diet of fish, rice, and seaweed can cut the chances of having a stroke. At least until the person sitting at the sushi bar gets their dinner bill
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Poynter Institute)
 
 
 
Here's how The Washington Post managed to count every single person shot to death by police in the United States in 2015, because no one else tracks that
source: poynter.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Just in time for Easter, Chris is risen
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 24, 2016
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Chip Kelly channels his inner Jake Blues when asked about his personnel moves in Philly
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Major League Baseball)
 
 
 
Ever wonder who was the person looking out of the center field clubhouse window at the precise moment Willie Mays made one of MLB's most famous plays? Prepare to be surprised
source: mlb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Virgin Galactic announces their next venture: supersonic flights from London to New York, only $5000 each way
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 23, 2016
(Metro)
 
 
 
This is why you have a hairy ass. Here comes the evolution
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Under Kansas' new "Spot a penis, win a prize" law Transgender people must use the restroom of their sex as "determined by..s chromosomes, and.. identified at birth by..anatomy", any one encountering a TG person in a school restroom is awarded $2,500
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Iowa Senate approves bill allowing ATV and snowmobile riders to carry loaded guns
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 22, 2016
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Reese Witherspoon charges fans $1500 to hear how to become more ambitious in business. Like charging $1500 per person for a one hour lecture
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon March 21, 2016
(KUTV Utah)
 
 
 
Workplace accidents led to 3,000 amputations in 2015. Mostly from employees trying to take the last doughnut out of the box of the person in the next cubicle
source: kutv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
With almost 69% of the vote, Bernie Sanders was the overwhelming choice to win the Democratic nomination to be President of the United States among Democrats who no longer actually LIVE in the United States
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Although it's hilarious in a teen comedy, in real life it's not so funny if you're on Spring Break and get caught stealing the beach patrol's personal watercraft
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun March 20, 2016
(YouTube)
 
Video
 
What would happen if you built a giant claw machine that uses a person as the claw?
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
The short answer to whether texting while walking should be made illegal? *bump* Hold on while I pick up my phone from the jerk I just bumped into
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat March 19, 2016
(Chicagoist)
 
 
 
Ugly ass Snow Monkey is born at the Lincoln Park Zoo, blushes
source: chicagoist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri March 18, 2016
(WFLA Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
A man who was driving erratically and wrecked several deputies' cruisers in the process explains his actions to the arresting officers by stating the following: 'I'm out of my mind on drugs'
source: wfla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
The "experts" at CNBC predict Sanders voters will become Trump voters if Hillary wins. Also, Cammy, from Street Fighter, is a real person and she'll be joining me for dinner tomorrow
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Boy is only person in America with two rare diseases whose treatments make the other disease worse
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Iowa waitress with dyed pink hair and a ring in her nose and big earrings gets a note saying tips are only for normal looking people
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 17, 2016
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Last night, the person running the BART Twitter account ran out of farks to give
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Bowe Bergdahl is not just the worst traitor since Eggs Benedict, he's got PTSD and is "diagnosed with schizotypal personality disorder". So, you know, if you want all the information
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Carl's Jr CEO to replace employees with machines
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Person of Interest will end with season five as there are no longer viewers of interest
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Pigeon pollution patrol possessing pollution prevention packs procure permission plus permit. Principal project person precautions pedestrians: potential pigeon pooping pollutants possible, pose potential predicament
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 16, 2016
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Newborn puppies rescued from trashcan will make you say 'Dawww' and 'WTF' at the same time
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
Instagram to display photos order, out of will test feed algorithm-based
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Havasu News)
 
 
 
Spring Break in Lake Havasu: People of Walmart edition
source: havasunews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 15, 2016
(CNN)
 
 
 
Politician turned carnival barker/TV host says that TV host turned Politician/carnival barker was inevitable
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Polygon)
 
 
 
System Shock, the 22-year-old horror game that influenced a lot of classics like Deus Ex and the first-person Fallout titles, is getting remade. This alpha preview is pretty ... and ominous
source: polygon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
There's a reason the IT guy always talks to you like you're stupid: He deals with people like this
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Variety)
 
 
 
Would you pay $50 to watch a Hollywood blockbuster at home the day it's released to theaters? The guy who found out that you'd pay $11 a person three times to watch people walk to Mordor for hours thinks so
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
The NFL finally admits to a link between football and brain disease. With helpful pic of what a person with brain disease might look like
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon March 14, 2016
(Baton Rouge Advocate)
 
 
 
DEA agent who has previously been name checked by rapper Scarface appears to be living in his own personal Training Day
source: theadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Hey Illinois, you've got an "s" no one cares about and you sound French. You're fired
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri March 11, 2016
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Ted Cruz is for personal responsibility. Unless he can blame Obama
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Sleepy endorses Grumpy, to the dismay of Dopey
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 10, 2016
(Purdue Exponent)
 
 
 
Supersonic ping-pong balls. For science. And Jimmy Fallon. Not necessarily in that order
source: purdueexponent.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Remember Peeple the "Yelp for people" app? It's actually out now because they totally fixed it and what could possibly go wrong anyway
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Womenfolk who have miscarriages or defective fetuses in Indiana will soon get a lesson in tough love and personal responsibility from GOP lawmakers
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
The Dalai Lama speaks out against Donald Trump's use of personal criticism in politics, so he's got that going for him, which is nice
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
ISIS personnel files leaked. DAMMIT PAM
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 09, 2016
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
Trump's personal voicemail hacked by Anonymous, changed to message recorded in voice of Shaggy. Trump responds by saying he would have got the presidency if it weren't for those meddling kids
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 08, 2016
(Politico)
 
 
 
Florida newspaper: We'd endorse a GOP candidate for President, but all of them are unqualified for the job
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon March 07, 2016
(CNN)
 
 
 
New breakup service sends e-mails, texts, phone messages significant others to end a relationship. Which is just slightly more inconsiderate than if the person was to break up by sending their own e-mail, text, phone message
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Carly Fiorina urges GOP voters to pick someone else for the Republican nomination other than Trump. Because If anyone could make Trump disappear, it's the person who laid off 40,000 employees at Hewlett-Packard
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
67-year-old Steven Tyler dating 28-year-old personal assistant. Subby wonders if it has anything to do with let's say money
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
How light is crime in Norway? The police force has the time and resources to try and track down the person who left behind a goldfish in a jam jar at an indoor soccer stadium. "Until then, the fish will stay in the jam jar and keep us company"
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun March 06, 2016
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
"Donald has attacked every person of color - except John Boehner." RELEASE THE BIDEN
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri March 04, 2016
(Oddity Central)
 
 
 
And today's "street beggar who finishes his shift and then climbs into his $70,000 Audi" story comes to you from the UK
source: odditycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Red and Black)
 
 
 
Early morning, meth and Waffle House...boring. Dressed as a clown? Now we have a story
source: redandblack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Another sad fact of the Republican Party being divided: The presidential election is wrecking the conservative dating scene because everyone's underwear is twisted tight
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
What really happens when a transgender person uses a locker room? I dunno... they get dressed?
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 03, 2016
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
No, Caitlyn, I don't think Cruz is looking for a trans outreach person at this time
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
An examination of whether it's time to do away with the personal check. But...but...but how else will I hold up the checkout line at the supermarket?
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tucson News Now)
 
 
 
Thieves have killed four people trying to steal weaves and products. Who is to blame? A) the thieves, B) the thieves, C) the thieves, or Z) demonic spirits?
source: tucsonnewsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 29, 2016
(E! Online)
 
 
 
Sam Smith is not the first openly gay Oscar winner. There was Melissa Ethridge in 2007. And Elton John in 1994. And Stephen Sondheim in 1991. And John Gielgud in 1991. And Alan Ball in 2000. And...eh, I'm done here
source: eonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun February 28, 2016
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
The 10 worst people you're likely to date in your 20s. Missing from the list: the Drummer
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Police Department)
 
 
 
"According to the victim, the suspect was last seen pushing his moped away from the scene because the moped had stalled"
source: bpdnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
And now for something completely different: a double week of EPL matches, including the Bournemouth gynecologists at the Watford Long John Silver impersonators. The penguin atop your television set explodes at 7:45 am EST. Nobody wants an argument
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Even if you don't have any sort of criminal record, don't steal stuff from the race car drivers' personal infield trailers at the Daytona 500. They take that shiat seriously down there
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat February 27, 2016
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Bagpiper completes personal quest to inflict the bagpipes on every continent on Earth in just 50 days: "During the self-funded charity trip the 57-year-old travelled 50,000 miles and played 12 gigs. She raised more than £5,000 for two charities"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Person on payroll of pothole patching producer patches potholes in pavement preceding private parkway to pad. Public paper pushers prefer pitch, propose pointless and petty procedures
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Futurity)
 
 
 
You should be ashamed to read this article
source: futurity.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 26, 2016
(Florida Alligator)
 
 
 
Local artist to stare at Ted Cruz's mouth for two hours. "I've been obsessed with Ted Cruz's mouth for some time now," Miller said. "It's perplexing to me how so much bullsh*t comes out"
source: alligator.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
Ben Carson says that he'd look at "the fruit salad of their life" before tossing a Supreme Court nominee to the Senate to be voted on. Not that there's anything wrong with that
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 25, 2016
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Apparently throwing food out of an airplane and hoping it lands on a hungry person isn't that effective
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wow 24/7)
 
 
 
As of now, only one person in the world has managed to get this hard-as-nails achievement in fiendish Steam game Devil Daggers
source: wow247.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 24, 2016
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Google has discovered critical flaw that an attacker could use it to infect almost everything on the entire internet if... you are the 1,000,000 person to view this headline please post your banking info to get your cash prize
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
This was the first personal photograph ever uploaded to the internet. Surprisingly, clothes are being worn in it
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue February 23, 2016
(TechRepublic)
 
 
 
Legendary engineer Wes Clark, co-inventor of the minicomputer whose work underpinned revolutions in personal computing, computer graphics, and the Internet, is dead at 88. Good night, LINC man
source: techrepublic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Drummer condenses Nirvana's entire back catalogue into a five-minute "drum chronology"
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Woman posts a pic of her rolled-up rim on Facebook - gets ripped off of her 100 toonie prize. Only Canadians will understand that sentence
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Morgan Freeman is finally a GPS navigation voice. In .5 miles, turn left at the big hayfield near Buxton
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Who starts a riot in a pizzeria? The same kind of person that has a problem with cheese, that's who
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 22, 2016
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
File this under Good To Know In An Apocalypse: The stock of an average supermarket could sustain one adult for 55 years
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
"A name is the least important part of your personality. It's given to you by someone else." Said Mr Bacon Double Cheeseburger
source: standard.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun February 21, 2016
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Random shooter causing ongoing hullabaloo in Kalamazoo. UPDATE: Suspect arrested
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat February 20, 2016
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Salisbury Cathedral moves huge sculpture because people keep walking into it while they're texting. Bonus for use of word 'gobsmacked' to describe situation
source: premierchristianradio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 19, 2016
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Trump lightens up on Francis
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlas Obscura)
 
 
 
Tired of explaining that vapor off an aircraft doesn't mean its flying supersonic? This probably won't help
source: atlasobscura.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 18, 2016
(Scout (New Zealand))
 
 
 
Well, if you're from New Zealand, you can learn the culture of the traditional haka war dance and do it with other Maoris respectfully. Or if you're a Spanish TV personality, you can just wing it
source: scout.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
The Pope is a loser
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Larry Brown Sports)
 
 
 
Usually, when stars retire, they turn the announcement into a year-long marketing event for their personal brand. Then there's Jared Allen and his horse
source: larrybrownsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 17, 2016
(Refinery29)
 
 
 
Brittney Spears desires the kind of love only a Fark can help her with
source: refinery29.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Ever wonder what word that was added to the Oxford English dictionary the year you were born? Behold the Birthday Word Generator
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
How many times can you be caught at 18 years old impersonating a doctor and running a fake medical practice before you get arrested? In Fark's favorite state, the answer is 3
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rocketnews 24)
 
 
 
Cool Celebrity: thanks you for the letter and box of snacks you sent him. Conan: he visits you in Korea to thank you
source: en.rocketnews24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Pope Francis loses his cool with person who almost knocked him down. Sounds like he should lighten up
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue February 16, 2016
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Scientists discover "stoner gene." Hah, I know that dude
source: national.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 15, 2016
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
People fear five-story poop chute recently completed at Shanghai mall
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Addicting Info)
 
 
 
According to CNN's Dana Bash: Obama being 3/4 of a president is "technically" better than him being 3/5 of a person
source: addictinginfo.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun February 14, 2016
(WKRN Nashville)
 
 
 
If you're going to try to scam a free drink at Golden Corral by impersonating a cop, you should know that the real cop in front of you in line can tell the difference between a genuine police badge and a Kentucky concealed carry badge
source: wkrn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contra Costa Times)
 
 
 
I used to be a pedestrian like you, then I took a blowdart in the knee
source: contracostatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat February 13, 2016
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Fraudster offering "Free & Clear Real Estate System" bilks customers out of $267 million. Facing $113 million judgment from FTC, mysteriously goes free and clear, prompting 60-person search party
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 12, 2016
(Spokesman Review)
 
 
 
I'm not a constitutional law expert, but I'm pretty sure there's nothing in the Constitution claiming drivers aren't required to have driver licenses
source: spokesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 11, 2016
(BT.com)
 
 
 
Feet keep washing up on beaches in British Columbia, just like they've been doing for the past 100 years
source: home.bt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Peeing in a cup for a drug test. New and creepy - giving some fingernail clippings to see what substances you've been on for the last several months
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Next Web)
 
 
 
Designers of $200 font expect to get programmers to switch from trusty Courier New or Helvetica to a typeface with supremely readable brackets, curlies, colons, 1's, l's, and I's
source: thenextweb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 10, 2016
(10 News)
 
 
 
Barber gives fade, catches fade
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Madeline Albright: "There's a special place in Hell for women who don't help each other." New Hampshire women: "Then, we'll see you in Hell"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue February 09, 2016
(Metro)
 
 
 
"Honey, why did you withdraw $22 and have an ATM surcharge of $2.50?" "I needed money for the strip club. The really cheap strip club"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 08, 2016
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
CNN commentator and self-described "personal friend" of Marco Rubio thinks he looks tired. Don't you think he looks tired?
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun February 07, 2016
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
You'd think that Bernie Sanders could count on winning an Iowa precinct in which there was exactly one caucus-goer, and that person voted for him. You'd be wrong
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat February 06, 2016
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Angry customer fires off load at Tampa strip club, killing one and wounding seven. I guess that was a gun in his pocket after all
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 05, 2016
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Asbestos removal requires specially-trained personnel wearing hazardous material suits working under carefully controlled conditions ... unless it's Orlando, then just call some firemen
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
If only there were some way to identify the criminal mastermind who sat down inside a photo booth and broke into the cash drawer
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 04, 2016
(Yakima Herald Republic)
 
 
 
Dear Crabby: "My granddaughter cheats at Candy Land." Crabby: "given that I laughed like an idiot when my nephew mooned me while shouting "BOO BOO BUTT", I may not be the best person to ask for advice here"
source: yakimaherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Former secretary of state found to have classified information on their personal email servers. Besides her
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Would the last person in Sydney please turn out the lights?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 03, 2016
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Asked if Bernie Madoff was the most hated person he's played, Richard Dreyfuss said no: "I've already played Dick Cheney"
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Comic Book Resources)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Arrow, When Roy Harper returns to Star City problems multiply when the Calculator is added to the equation (CW 8ET)
source: comicbookresources.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
On Hillary, Chris Christie promises to "beat her rear end", adding that when he's done, "she'll be relieved"
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fast Company)
 
 
 
If you write stuff about Tesla on the internet and Elon Musk doesn't like it, he'll personally cancel your Tesla order
source: fastcompany.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cal Coast News)
 
 
 
Burger King employee uses his car to ventilate the restaurant after gas leak prank. Now with video goodness
source: calcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue February 02, 2016
(SFGate)
 
 
 
World's heaviest man, attempting to lose weight, dies after developing energy drink habit. "His consumption...was the equivalent of a person with no health problems consuming 42 cans of Coke in three days"
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Attending Super Bowl 50's opening night were a reporter in gold spandex, a guy with skis, Miss Universe, and the Muppets' Swedish chef (pics)
source: blogs.denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Stack)
 
 
 
Nintendo is returning to VR after twenty years
source: thestack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 01, 2016
(Florida Alligator)
 
 
 
Man at Walmart arrested for assault with a delicious weapon
source: alligator.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WUSA9)
 
 
 
1 fatally stabbed in |▮|| |||| |||▮| ||
source: wusa9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
PO-TAY-TOES: Boil'em, mash'em, send'em as a gift with a personalised message
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat January 30, 2016
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
Couple who met on Instagram marry at airport minutes after meeting for the 1st time. #ThisShouldEndWell
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri January 29, 2016
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Oklahoma Lawmaker proposes bills to forbid HIV+ people from marrying, sanction "gay conversion therapy" and forbid schools from referring students to mental health counselors on an issue that "pertain[s] to human sexuality". Because Jesus apparently
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 28, 2016
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
In a headline subby swears he isn't making up: Stalin 'used secret laboratory to analyse Mao's excrement'
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed January 27, 2016
(Tech Dirt)
 
 
 
Cop sent UWIE to 16-year-old girl. But its okay because "she's probably seen penises on the internet anyway"
source: techdirt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Evening Telegraph (UK))
 
 
 
Seven police cars scrambled to intercept dangerous man armed with a deadly bicycle repair kit. "There was a misunderstanding," said police spokesperson
source: eveningtelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue January 26, 2016
(DCist)
 
 
 
Say goodbye to the only person who spent 30 years in DC without trying to screw you
source: dcist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Advice columnist pranked by letter with old "Seinfeld" plot. Just remember, it's not a lie if you believe it
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon January 25, 2016
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Prosecutor to Making a Murderer defendant: Why don't you just confess so I can write a book about your murder case?
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wonkette)
 
 
 
"Excuse me, the person in the car behind you is very drunk. Do you mind waiting here at the window until the police arrive?"
source: wonkette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Hampshire Voice)
 
 
 
Zebra stripes won't save you from a lion, but might help against biting flies. Personally, I'd have worried more about the lions, Darwin
source: nhv.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun January 24, 2016
(CBS Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Man dies from carbon monoxide poisoning after snow plow traps him inside car
source: philadelphia.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Bad news: Police inquiry fails to identify headless body. Silver lining: It has found 263 missing persons alive and well
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Donald Rumsfeld helps develop a solitaire app. No word yet if Dick Cheney will be pitching in on a first person shooter
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Just a reminder: you cannot pack your bat'leth in carry-on luggage, regardless of your personal honor or your place in the Klingon Empire
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat January 23, 2016
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Newly engaged couple Mariah Carey and James Packer both got so caught up in the moment of their engagement neither person remembered they were still legally married
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
The hottest person on Instagram is a 93-year-old Japanese woman named Emiko
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri January 22, 2016
(York Press, UK)
 
 
 
Hello. Police? Yeah, I'm going out on the pull tonight. Might get lucky. Thought it best to let you know just in case
source: yorkpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Kettle suggests that Pot's abrasive personality makes him unfit for the presidency
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 21, 2016
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Study indicates gluten-free diets do nothing for the person following them. The resulting high smug levels can be particularly toxic to dinner companions though
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed January 20, 2016
(Variety)
 
 
 
Tonight on Arrow, Ollie goes all season 1 looking for Dahrk (CW 8ET)
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
I can haz city website?
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon January 18, 2016
(WJLA Washington DC)
 
 
 
Virginia police have a BOLO on Slenderman
source: wjla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Adore your penthouse view? The higher your floor, the lower your chance of survival from a heart attack
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Times of India)
 
 
 
No, old people, young people aren't ruining English. We all are
source: timesofindia.indiatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat January 16, 2016
(CNN)
 
 
 
Iran frees four US prisoners
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri January 15, 2016
(Action A Go-Go)
 
 
 
The raid on El Chapo was caught on camera by the Mexican Marines who raided the compound, which proves that even the Marines have that one person WHO HAS TO RECORD EVERYTHING
source: actionagogo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
WHO: "The West African Ebola outbreak is over." Sierra Leone: "Uh... not so fast there"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 14, 2016
(Daily Edge (Ireland))
 
 
 
How to troll a store that prints personalised Nutella jars like a BOSS with rude names
source: dailyedge.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed January 13, 2016
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A look at how big your retirement fund should be at every age. Or, if you prefer, a handy chart for quantifying how screwed you are
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Another intelligence official's personal account hacked, and this time it's the phone of James Clapper, the Director of National Intelligence. In an ironic touch, phone calls were forwarded to the Free Palestine Movement
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue January 12, 2016
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida police need help identifying man hit by car. Now I'm no genius, but I'd guess he's the one covered in tire tracks
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Prolific British bicycle thief becomes the first person to be given a lifetime ban not just from from riding a bike, but from going within four metres of a bike for the rest of his life
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Amid low stock value and a poor Christmas showing, Kohl's considers privatizing or even breaking up the company to prevent a hostile takeover
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon January 11, 2016
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Fox News continues its tradition of sound economic policy by telling viewers to "buy as many lottery tickets as you can afford"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun January 10, 2016
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
You're a real jerk if you're the kind of person who throws a birthday party for your kid on a Sunday in the middle of the NFL playoffs and all the other parents are obligated to attend
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digital Spy)
 
 
 
Person of Interest may be canceled due to a lack of persons interested in watching
source: digitalspy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat January 09, 2016
(Powerball)
 
 
 
Will only one person win and decide tomorrow which country they want to buy? How big of a dent will the taxes put in the national debt? Will it be a Farker who'll buy everybody a beer and TotalFark? Its the Powerball drawing, live at 11PM ET/8 PT
source: powerball.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri January 08, 2016
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Noted really old guy Herman Wouk writes memoir Sailor and Fiddler. Personally, I would have gone with Wouk on the Wild Side
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Showbiz 411)
 
 
 
Barry Manilow's new album pairs him with deceased stars on their signature hits. Finally, the first person in the music business who has figured out how to deal with all the divas
source: showbiz411.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Hillary "surprised" that a State Department employee used a personal email account
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Social media universe explodes after sports television personality hugs his 8-year-old daughter during the national anthem
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Marissa: I'd Like to Fire about 10% of my employees
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 07, 2016
(Winter Is Coming)
 
 
 
It seems like every single person working on the Game of Thrones set wants to spoil the upcoming season for the rest of us
source: winteriscoming.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed January 06, 2016
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Ambulance provides one-stop shopping experience
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
"Pro-gunner" debates "pro-reasonable changes to background-checks" spokesperson. Gets as far as "Solyndra" and "Planned Parenthood" before the wheels on the train come off, off, off
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue January 05, 2016
(Fox5 DC)
 
 
 
Alexandria gym helps fitness buffs reach personal highs for VCO max
source: fox5dc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Star Press)
 
 
 
If you're going to be your county's first arrest of 2016, you might as well do it drunk off your ass doing cartwheels on the highway
source: thestarpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cheddar Valley Gazette)
 
 
 
The most 'local person complains about local matter' letter you'll have seen this year
source: cheddarvalleygazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon January 04, 2016
(WUNC Chapel Hill)
 
 
 
That awkward moment when you walk into an American Eagle Outfitter and your English teacher is the person who helps you in the fitting room
source: wunc.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMJ4 Milwaukee)
 
 
 
"I will never go back for New Year's Eve After the way we were treated when we spent $700+ and having our meal ruined by watching a dead person being wheeled out from an overdose" Eatery: Yeah, about that 70-yr-old having a heart attack, you POS
source: tmj4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun January 03, 2016
(PBS)
 
 
 
Lady Edith will continue her Jan Brady impersonation and Carson will scowl disapprovingly at everyone as the sixth and final season of Downton Abbey premieres for American audiences tonight at 9 PM on PBS
source: pbs.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Been thinking about the seeming inequity of the universe since I found out the person who created this cool song was Milla Jovovich. It irritates the lining of my soul every time a person seems to get all the positive traits a person can have
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat January 02, 2016
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Hackers see Linux on PS4 and raise something even dumber: Windows 95 on a 3DS
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 

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