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Source	Fark Headline		Comments
		There are delusional people and then there is this guy  (theatlanticwire.com)	(13)
		Conservatives: "The reason poor people are falling behind is because liberals have corrupted their values -- not anything we've done." Krugman: "Now wait a damn minute here. . "  (nytimes.com)	(120)
		Problem: People are beginning to understand how much their private info is worth and thus, are refusing to give it up to Google. Solution: Google will now pay you to track you completely  (tech.slashdot.org)	(25)

(Some Guy)		Problem: You have a city full of people who have no ability whatsoever to parallel park. Solution: Stop testing parallel parking on the driving test. Ta-Da, problem solved  (dcist.com)	(113)
		People picked randomly from US phonebook would do better than current congress   (tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(95)
		St. Louis man fatally shot trying to get people to sign a petition to make Missouri safer  (stltoday.com)	(76)
(AmeriCOUNT)		Rep. Luis Gutierrez (D-IL) to Newt: You want to hear about the Food Stamp President? He added 18 million people to the program and increased spending in it by $19 Billion. Oh, and by the way, his name was George W. Bush  (americount.org)	(146)

Santorum's stunning 30-point victory over Romney in Missouri is tempered somewhat by the fact that: A) The primary didn't count, and therefore B) only 30,000 people actually showed up to vote  (news.yahoo.com)

(82)

(Bangor Daily News)		You'd think with 7 UFOs hovering around the people of Milo, Maine wouldn't be complaining about how dark it is up there  (seeclickfix.com)	(19)
		New Poll shows that 52% of respondents say the more they hear about Romney the less they like him and more than half of even the most conservative people polled think he isn't paying his "fair share" of taxes  (news.yahoo.com)	(52)
		"Police spoke to the man, who said he had just gotten out of the shower and was walking past the window. He said he did not realize there were a lot of people across the street who could see him"  (palmbeachpost.com)	(43)

(Some Black Guy)		Improv Everywhere introduces Aspen to black people  (improveverywhere.com)	(24)
		Woman astounded at people lining up for new Target clothing line... while waiting for said clothing line  (latimes.com)	(46)
		Romney campaign: The reason why only 33,000 people showed up to vote in Nevada is because everyone else is already satisfied with Romney and didn't need to vote to prove it  (thinkprogress.org)	(139)

Researcher at Institute of Extracting Theories from Our Rectums posits that epidemic of Tourette's-like symptoms plaguing New York town is caused by people unconsciously mimicking what they see on Facebook and YouTube  (dailymail.co.uk)

(30)

(Inquisitr)		"Mother Nature Network even made the front page of Fark, another indicator of a meme becoming increasingly viral." We're a positive influence, people. (3rd paragraph shoutout)  (inquisitr.com)	(5)
		Mitt Romney: We are the only people who put their hand over our hearts during the national anthem. In other news, Chinese, South Africans, Brazilians, Ghanaians, Cubans, Mexicans, and Peruvians aren't people  (buzzfeed.com)	(159)

		Since they don't get enough attention in this country, Arizona lawmaker proposes a holiday to celebrate white people  (huffingtonpost.com)	(325)
(Some Guy)		London's first "shared space" road is a misery for drivers, blind people, and cleaners, but at least it looks weird  (thisislondon.co.uk)	(107)
		37 people gunned down at South Sudan peace conference  (bbc.co.uk)	(71)
		There may be too many people for Earth, but not for Super Earth  (time.com)	(49)
(Some Guy)		Danny Bonaduce and Barry Williams to star in new SyFy original movie. Surprisingly, it's not a movie about traveling back in time to when people would want to see Greg Brady and Danny Partridge  (tvbythenumbers.zap2it.com)	(16)
		Phil Mickelson is suing to find out the real names of people that posted nasty comments about him and his wife on the internet. Personally I heard it was Mike Hawk and Harry Sack  (utsandiego.com)	(50)

		"Start saving your pennies now. People spend $300 on crazy things all the time, things like handbags. So work all year, scrape the money together, and come to my show. I'm worth it"  (starpulse.com)	(101)
(Some Fake Agent)		Apparently, the idea of pretending to be a federal agent and pulling people with Ontario plates who visit strip clubs so you can check their car for bombs hasn't gotten old in Hudson  (newportrichey.wtsp.com)	(37)
		Crackers recalled due to egg allergen concerns, white people problems  (reuters.com)	(49)
		Santorum tells sick kid who complained about the price of his medicine "People have no problem paying $900 for an iPad, but paying $900 for a drug they have a problem with Why?" Because, of course, people buy a new iPad EVERY MONTH  (abcnews.go.com)	(290)
		10000 people placed on the No-Fly List in 2011. Take that, really lousy terrorists who didn't have a backup plan  (hosted.ap.org)	(14)
		Alabama State Senator Shadrack McGill: "If you double a teacher's pay scale, you'll attract people who aren't called to teach"  (huffingtonpost.com)	(445)

		You're Newt Gingrich's superPAC director. Do you c) respond to criticism of dog-whistling by blaming MSNBC, saying that black people have no role models, and that Democrats abort black babies?  (salon.com)	(125)
		14-year old girl testifying before MD lawmakers tells them that they should vote to deny people their basic civil rights because it would be "my best birthday present ever"  (rawstory.com)	(257)
		At least 73 people dead and scores injured as rivals clash in Egypt. Against the government? No, football  (aljazeera.com)	(149)
		No rational person thinks Facebook is worth $100 billion. But then again, how many rational people are there left on Wall Street these days?  (thedailybeast.com)	(70)
		Birdwatchers? They kidnapped birdwatchers? What kind of crazy terrorists think anyone would want to ransom birdwatchers? These are the people that make stamp collectors seem interesting  (upi.com)	(29)
		Salvation Army kettles collect a record $147 million at Christmas as people apparently will pay whatever it takes to stop the constant bell ringing  (content.usatoday.com)	(11)
		Arab League goes before UN to plead for help in stopping Syrian govt massacring its own people. Guess which nation is putting a kibosh on any assistance  (aljazeera.com)	(68)
		Just when you thought college football was on the sidelines, Hope springs eternal ....It's National Signing Day, people  (espn.go.com)	(94)
		Minecraft developer learns the hard way that when you crowd-source your translations, you deal with people who annoy you  (joystiq.com)	(44)

		People in Seattle after a major snow storm in 2008: We don't have enough snowplows. People in Seattle after a major snow storm in 2012: We have too many snowplows  (seattlepi.com)	(61)
		The 46 types of people on Facebook  (buzzfeed.com)	(106)
(Miami New Times)		"Newt Gingrish look like a hackler. He looks like he get on people's nerves just for the fark of it,'" and more insight on the Florida GOP primary from Miami strippers Skrawberry and Tip Drill  (blogs.miaminewtimes.com)	(71)
		Donald Trump to build cemetery near his New Jersey golf course. Groundskeeper told to expect an additional 1000 people under him  (upi.com)	(14)
		People aren't watching the Republican debates to learn about the issues - "It's like you're tuning in to a car race, you really want to see if there's a wreck"  (huffingtonpost.com)	(66)

		Author of the "Don't say Gay" bill thrown out of a restaurant. "If you don't think the way certain people think, then they think you don't have a right to be served," he said, completely missing the irony  (buzzfeed.com)	(215)
(SlashGear)		It's yet another article about a Facebook "upgrade" that has people "considering" deleting their profiles. It's like tech writers aren't even trying anymore. Time to feed the dogs, Mr. Pavlov  (slashgear.com)	(65)

		Restaurant owner discovers that over the years, people have tacked more than $10,000 in one-dollar bills to his cafe's walls. Donates 3-grand to the Boy Scouts and the rest to a hospital. Man, did those bills have a lot of dust on them  (seattlepi.com)	(73)
(Fairbanks Daily News-Minus)		How many people are willing go through with a 10k fun run at -49 degrees? Six, apparently  (newsminer.com)	(57)
		Over 30 years later, people are still trying to explain Stanley Kubrick's film "The Shining." A new documentary explores a number of crazy theories and the pecan logs who believe them  (nytimes.com)	(230)
		This just in: retailers will pay people to write positive reviews of their products  (consumerist.com)	(35)
(Seattle Weekly)		Irish distillery unveils 65% ABV version of poitin, hopes to export it to USA. "We want to bring Poitín out from the shadows and let Irish people have a national white spirit they can be proud of"  (blogs.seattleweekly.com)	(60)

		Massachusetts is getting drive-through grocery stores for people who can't risk light exercise  (bostonherald.com)	(38)
		In 40 years, people will flock to the palm-fringed beaches of England  (telegraph.co.uk)	(72)

		Irish crash caused by a nation full of drunk people. Drunk on credit, that is  (bbc.co.uk)	(29)
		Mitch Daniels: "Steve Jobs created more jobs than Obama's entire stimulus." Krugman: "Apple employs 700,000 people outside the US; 43,000 inside of it. There's a reason for that, bud"  (nytimes.com)	(153)
		American sniper with 255 kills asked if he feels remorse. "When I do go face God there is going to be lots of things I will have to account for, but killing any of those people is not one of them"  (bbc.co.uk)	(563)
		Users of popular remote control software warned to stop using it because it might allow people to remotely control their computer  (bbc.co.uk)	(14)
		"I've had sex with 1000 men, and I don't care if people judge me," says woman who apparently has sex with a lot of drunk men  (mirror.co.uk)	(170)
		It's kind of tough to market yourself as a socialist champion of the people when your 14-year-old daughter is posting bling pictures online  (foxnews.com)	(84)
		Ohio Republican goes rogue on new restrictive voting law: "It's likely to be misused by people for their own political ends to confuse voters about what the rules are for the election"  (toledoblade.com)	(33)
		Woman finds $1 million winning lottery ticket in the trash. Naturally, 2 people are suing her  (abcnews.go.com)	(101)
		Haiti = Fail: 520,000 people remain in squalid camps, many more returned to wrecked homes rather than endure the camps' inhuman conditions, blamed for driving up violence, rape and pedophilia  (dailymail.co.uk)	(118)
		Prepaid card imprint Green Dot grows 4Q revenue 77% on news that people hate Bank of America so much that they'd rather pay the exact same fees to anyone but Bank of America  (finance.yahoo.com)	(19)

		Study finds religion boosts self-esteem in religious societies, but has no effect in secular ones. Science, on the other hand, makes people everywhere feel AWESOME  (livescience.com)	(60)
		So, some woman at the bar claimed to be a back-up singer for SWV in the 90's. She had a few people believing it. What whoppers have you recently encountered?  (yahoo.com)	(189)
		Tired of seeing people wearing their PJ's to the store? If one man had his way, we'd be wearing them all day, everyday, everywhere. Subby just hopes his button-back flannel onesies don't come loose on the subway  (slate.com)	(73)
		I know some people can be cranky when they've been woken up, but taking a baseball bat to the person who woke them seems a little extreme  (sltrib.com)	(20)
		Fashion designers have their annual runaway fashiongasm, and the results are...well...um...people actually pay money for this crap? (w/pics of hot women in ugly clothes)  (thedailybeast.com)	(26)
		Rockwell reports 22% surge in net income, the feeling of people watching them  (jsonline.com)	(15)

		Lindsay Lohan sued for hitting stroller with car. Be here next week when Lindsay Lohan is sued for shoving elderly people and scowling at puppies  (tmz.com)	(33)
		Here's a wild idea: Why don't we pay poor people more?  (cnbc.com)	(231)
		Since the beginning of the recall effort against him, the people have rallied around WI Gov Scott Walker, donating almost $4 million to his campaign. And by "the people" I mean millionaires in TX, MO, and AZ  (news.yahoo.com)	(107)
		From the maker of "Corporations are people" meet "Well, the banks aren't bad people. They're just overwhelmed right now." Bank of America twirls it's Snidely Whiplash mustache as he nods in agreement  (foxnews.com)	(60)
		Why they changed it I can't say. Maybe these relics will indicate people just liked it better that way  (nytimes.com)	(6)

		Most people who think they have food allergies are just allergic to the truth  (blogs.villagevoice.com)	(242)
(Houston Press)		Experts say to expect more arrests of people shoving steak down their pants as meat prices skyrocket this year  (blogs.houstonpress.com)	(123)
		Five crazy ways people amused themselves before television. "Dueling for dollars" strangely absent  (mentalfloss.com)	(20)
		Climbing trees. Fun as a kid. However if you're an adult and you're doing it to peep into people's houses, Police might have a problem  (wgal.com)	(21)

		South Korean Presidential candidate declares he is able to cure cancer by staring into people's eyes, moves ahead of Romney in the Republican primary polls  (reuters.com)	(34)
		Year of the Dragon to spur baby boom in Asia. Because if there's one thing Asia needs, it's more people  (newsfeed.time.com)	(86)
		You can't really say your Sweet Sixteen party is a success until at least six people get shot  (news.yahoo.com)	(79)
(Some Guy)		People in countries as far apart as Budapest, Hungary and Canada have reported hearing mysterious loud snoring sounds coming from the skies late at night  (asiaone.com)	(146)

		Supreme Court Justice Scalia, who has argued that the government has broad rights to censor television, feels that if people don't like superPAC ads they should just "turn the TV off"  (cbsnews.com)	(152)
		NPR's Nina Totenberg claims that more people used food stamps under Bush than Obama. Not only is she wrong, but instantly starts claiming that "Facts Don't Matter" to Newt on the subject  (newsbusters.org)	(90)
		Blizzard halts search for missing people on Mt. Rainier, decides to focus on raiding instead  (seattletimes.nwsource.com)	(68)

		New definition of autism would exclude 6,270,199,439 people  (nytimes.com)	(70)
		Cop's job description: traffic tickets ✔, bust dope smokers ✔, hassle brown people ✔, mace protestors ✔, more traffic tickets ✔, save 10-year-old boy's life ✖  (foxnews.com)	(149)
		On the off chance that his constituency might include people who like to Fark, watch Youtube, cheat using Wikipedia, or simply illegally download some music, Harry Reid (D-idn't think it all the way through) has postponed the vote on PIPA  (news.yahoo.com)	(108)
		If you're going to teabag an unconscious LSU fan after your team just won the National Championship, don't record it and put it online. Teabagging, while hilarious, is what other less-funny people like to call "sexual assault"  (espn.go.com)	(133)
		Look, people. Stop repeating the lies. The Concordia's captain did *not* flee his ship right after the crash. He ordered a nice dinner with his girlfriend first while supplies were falling off the kitchen shelves. Michael Brown nods approval  (cnn.com)	(104)
		Gary Glitter Twitter account attracts scorn, but the prize goes to comedian Frankie Boyle's tweet "Hi Gary. Would you say it's you or the captain of the Concordia that's f****d more people in international waters?"  (dailymail.co.uk)	(52)
		Study of 160,000 people reveals shocking discovery: Smart people invest more intelligently in the stock market  (abc.net.au)	(10)
		New report says one in five people suffer from mental illness, so look around you, if you see four mentally healthy people, it's you  (nydailynews.com)	(83)

		Obama deciding to side with the people on SOPA/PIPA somehow makes it a political issue, which is apparently unfair to Hollywood. Subby would play the world's tiniest violin for them, but then Fark would have its DNS revoked  (politico.com)	(99)
(Some open-minded guy)		Despite what many people think, Newt Gingrich is a very open-minded kinda guy  (wmal.com)	(64)
		Ancient find shows people have been bringing popcorn to arguments 1,000 years longer than previously thought  (theregister.co.uk)	(3)
(Visual.ly)		Your pets get cheap food and the occasional people food snack. Here are how the 1% of pets live  (visual.ly)	(59)

(IKEA.com)		Assembly instructions for every single piece of junk IKEA makes, you can almost smell the frustration from here (just like the people contemplating how this went green)  (ikea.com)	(56)
		"Large, litigious copyright holders such as the MPAA and the RIAA will issue floods of copyright violation accusations to everyone from Google to Fark." This is why we have to protest, people (2nd paragraph from bottom)   (blogs.scientificamerican.com)	(1)
		25 people who thought SOPA was about soap. The stupid, it burns  (buzzfeed.com)	(47)
		TSA apologizes for strip searching elderly women...also, ugly women, men, women with small boobs, people with hideous disfiguring scars, and pets  (nydailynews.com)	(16)
		UK is proposing a registry for famous people who don't want to be covered in the media  (independent.co.uk)	(17)
		Nick Cannon reveals details of his kidney issues. "We didn't want to say 'kidney failure' so people would think I gotta get new kidneys and Gary Coleman and all that stuff"  (news.yahoo.com)	(18)
		NYPD decides to use a new device that beams x-rays at random people to see if they have guns. Well what could go wrong with beaming x-rays all over the place when people are legally allowed to have guns  (dailymail.co.uk)	(85)
		ALRIG/ht GODDMN IT YOU KNOWWHAT? PEOPLE ARE ASKING ME WY I SUPPORT SOPA AND WANT ME TO DELETE POLITICS QUEUE GOTOHELL UM GONNAAPPROVE EVERYTHING THEY SUbMIT UntiL IU PASS OUT  (fark.com)	(lots)

(Some Guy)		Family takes kids to Chuck E. Cheese for birthday party, asks people at next table to clean up their language. You know what happens next  (13abc.com)	(183)
		Safety conscious Indonesia deals with dangerous situation of people riding on roofs of overcrowded trains by suspending chain-tethered concrete balls above the tracks (pics)  (news.yahoo.com)	(147)
(Some Unemployed Guy)		A sign of the times. Employers are having a hard time finding people to work for them  (lifeinc.today.msnbc.msn.com)	(219)
		Study claims pseudonymous commenters produce posts of higher quality compared to comments from people who log in with their real names. Study author's Fark handle not mentioned  (boingboing.net)	(46)
		Drunk driver who killed 2 people on Christmas 2007 has a moment of Florida clarity and decides to sue them  (tampabay.com)	(239)
		Just like centuries ago, the only people telling the truth are the court jesters  (rawstory.com)	(128)
		Best place to leave security secrets for the 2012 London Olympics: In the safe at Scotland Yard. Worst place to leave security secrets for the 2012 London Olympics: On the train a million people ride on each day  (myfoxdc.com)	(26)
		10 really bizarre brain disorders. How people can enjoy Jersey Shore or Teen Mom not on the list  (io9.com)	(60)

		"He cursed. He did things that people do behind closed doors. He was regular"  (myfoxdc.com)	(197)
		North Korea: People who did not mourn correctly were not sent to a concentration camp. Translation: They were actually sent to a gulag  (cnn.com)	(93)
(Some Business Review)		People lie more in electronic communications than face-to-face, according to the article written by an astronaut-police-tiger I trained  (web.hbr.org)	(34)
		Super Bowl ad placement begs the question: Should Jesus be marketed alongside Cialis? Why not, they're both all about getting wood to nail people  (washingtonpost.com)	(69)

(Some UFO dude)		"Some people get a little upset to hear that their UFO sighting might be nothing more than a hot paper bag." With pic of what a hot paper bag might look like  (houston-today.com)	(33)
		If corporations are people, doesn't that make Mitt Romney a serial killer?  (buzzfeed.com)	(98)

Not to alarm anyone, but the robots are planning to put us in zoos, you know, for our protection. No mention of stealing old people's medicine  (youtube.com)

(17)

		Lawmaker wants to make it illegal for people to wear pajamas in public  (qctimes.com)	(194)
(Some Guy)		Cops in uniform caught meeting up in empty parking lot and playing football. (with pics) Some people have a problem with this  (13wmaz.com)	(83)
		You know how police have been harassing people for filming instances police misconduct with their smartphones? Well it looks like the Obama Administration may finally be doing something about that  (arstechnica.com)	(184)
		Media: The GOP needs to stop being beholden to the fringe people called 'conservatives' and shift towards the left, where most Americans are. Facts: 41% of Americans identify as Conservative, 21% as Liberal and 35% Moderate  (townhall.com)	(280)
(The Truth About Cars)		Not News: People are stealing cars. News: Car thieves are getting more technologically sophisticated. FARK: They can steal it while you're farking driving it  (thetruthaboutcars.com)	(33)
		Wimpy's introduces braille burgers, so that blind people can hate them too  (huffingtonpost.com)	(34)
		It's Friday the 13th, a day in which close to one billion dollars is lost from people missing work because too scared to leave their homes, losses to airlines from fear of flying, and mirror breakage  (cbc.ca)	(94)
		Dominic Strauss-Kahn's defense: "At these parties, people were not dressed, and I defy you to tell the difference between a naked prostitute and any other naked woman"  (dailymail.co.uk)	(54)
		17-year-old boy goes to school dressed as a girl. Yes, some people have a problem with this (w/pics)  (dailymail.co.uk)	(192)

		Rihanna: "To hell with the People's Choice Awards. I'll go the Clippers game and have my OWN awards show with blackjack and hookers... you know what? FORGET THE AWARDS SHOW"  (tmz.com)	(38)
		New York City health department has found their newest spokesperson against the dangers of super-sizing: a diabetic amputee. Naturally, some people have a problem with this. Mostly, though, they work for fast food companies   (cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com)	(127)
		Airlines needing additional income to cover rising fuel costs, now looking heavily at fat people  (news.com.au)	(105)
		New study says that people tend to overestimate what others are willing to pay. In other news, Baltimore Orioles announce lower season ticket prices  (bottomline.msnbc.msn.com)	(10)
		The winners of the 2012 Peoples' Choice Awards have been revealed, and it shows one thing: people should have no choice in who receives awards  (cbsnews.com)	(82)

		The banker who doesn't understand why people hate bankers: "Main Street says you're still getting paid too much: Even getting cut from $1 million to $500,000, they still think you're earning too much"  (nymag.com)	(50)
		Video apparently shows U.S. Marines urinating on bodies of dead Taliban fighters. Naturally, some people are pissed off about this  (telegraph.co.uk)	(295)
		"Quite clearly, some people's attitudes towards tribal peoples haven't moved on a jot. The Jarawa are not circus ponies bound to dance at anyone's bidding." "OOTINI"  (news.yahoo.com)	(45)
		Stay tuned for the next exciting episode of "The Supremes vs. America," where the Black-Robed Cabal declares arbitration clauses are people, too  (npr.org)	(107)
		Rare color photographs from Germany in the 1930s discovered, but inept film developer appears to have emphasized almost exclusively black, red, and white in all the shots. Some people can't get anything reich  (life.com)	(75)
		Unlike the people who buy them, TVs will be getting brighter, thinner, and more social  (cnn.com)	(42)

		"A sign language interpreter glove that links to your smartphone." If only there was some other way that deaf people could text on a smartphone  (theatlantic.com)	(26)
		67% of South Carolina voters believe "only people are people," so why should it be that you and I get along so awfully?  (gothamist.com)	(80)
		Pennsylvania plans to make the amount of food stamps that people receive contingent on the assets they possess. You hungry? You gonna need to sell that playstation  (philly.com)	(250)
		Katy Perry backs out of People's Choice Awards. Doesn't beep like Kim Kardashian  (people.com)	(42)
		Five people conservatives should blame if Mitt Romney wins  (newyorker.com)	(50)
		People get happier as they get older, study reveals. NOW GET OFF MY LAWN  (dailymail.co.uk)	(79)
		Rum manufacturer to give away 101 free tattoos to people with poor decision-making skills  (suntimes.com)	(167)

Report says that people should go at least two days a week without drinking. Forty-eight non-consecutive hours in a week counts as two days, right?  (bbc.co.uk)

(53)

Australian woman manages "miracle escape" after cord snap during bungee jump over crocodile-infested waters. In other news, some people are stupid enough to bungee jump over crocodile-infested waters  (mirror.co.uk)

(128)

(LA Magazine)		Trying to find a parking space is driving people insane. Pulling in to a parallel space front first is stealing. It's how you park when you're pulling a bank job  (lamag.com)	(64)
		Lesbian announces her intention to run for Miss California, which, of course, some people are upset about. Who cares? She's hot  (huffingtonpost.com)	(224)
		Kristy McNichol comes out as gay, depressed  (huffingtonpost.com)	(96)
		5 people, 1 guitar, tons of talent  (youtube.com)	(90)
(Brisbane Courier-Mail)		Former speed drinking world record holder Bob Hawke demonstrates how to win friends and influence people in Australia  (couriermail.com.au)	(24)

		Sen. John McCain: "I am confident with the leadership and backing of the American people, President Obama will turn this country around"  (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(150)
		To the three people still using AOL Instant Messenger: stop  (theregister.co.uk)	(66)
(AlanCross.ca)		How did the special audience lyrics in Billy Idol's "Mony Mony" originate? Seriously, people, this is an important anthropological question that needs an answer  (alancross.ca)	(166)
(SF Gate)		Giants fans, if you ever wanted your very own Brian Wilson garden gnome, be one of the first 20,000 people at the May 20 game at AT&T Park  (sfist.com)	(22)
		People close to her said she sounded like she was going to cough up a lung. And then she did  (dailymail.co.uk)	(47)
		Archaeologists have discovered that the people of Pompeii were slobby and crude. Trash was found inside tombs as well as graffiti of the 'bathroom' variety. "Cleopatra goes down"  (news.yahoo.com)	(71)
		In Barack Obama I saw a man who could single-handedly destroy the country and someone with no respect for the history, the Constitution, or the people of the United States  (americanthinker.com)	(139)
		Researchers take time out from trying to prove water is wet, fire hot, by discovering people prefer their dates to be attractive  (upi.com)	(10)
		Guns don't kill people. 50 caliber semiautomatic Desert Eagle wielding trailer park stepchild rednecks kill people (with gratuitious pic)  (ohio.com)	(77)
		Santorum: "All the people that live in the West Bank are Israelis. They're not Palestinians - there is no Palestinian - this is Israeli land"  (thelede.blogs.nytimes.com)	(224)

		Researchers examine if dogs can really tell when people talk to them. Your dog wants to know how your day was  (io9.com)	(82)
(Some Guy)		45% of the people that voted for the really cool awesome dude are unemployed  (hapblog.com)	(291)
		Q: How many people does it take to pick out a light bulb? A: 535  (myfoxdc.com)	(138)
		After getting into a frothy mess over his "Not wanting to make Black people's lives easier" line, Santorum connects the dots and concludes people must be angry because he said "black" and not "African American"  (thehill.com)	(300)
		David Beckham bewildered about why people think he is a secret homosexual. In other news, Mr Beckham stars in a new underwear campaign that proudly exhibits his groin bulge  (latimesblogs.latimes.com)	(66)
		Man scams pay phone users out of $4 million. In other news, pay phones were used to make calls by people before there were cellphones  (myfoxdc.com)	(24)
		Only 1 in 3 doctors knows to wash their hands after coming into contact with the barf/fluids of the patient they saw just before they see you. Don't worry though, last year only 100,000 people croaked as a result  (theatlantic.com)	(49)
(wmal.com)		White people "can't do a damn thing to me or about me. Isn't that funny?" says DC's Mayor for Life Marion Barry. Ya know, the one who was caught smoking crack in the 90s and now they're making a movie about him  (wmal.com)	(71)
		New study released by the Institute for People That Aren't Farkers (IPTAF) says that raising prices on alcoholic beverages may curb drinking  (cnews.canoe.ca)	(33)
		"For the next twelve hours Debbie was made to stand in a large garbage can and face one hundred people screaming at her demanding a confession as to her 'homosexual tendencies'"  (blogs.villagevoice.com)	(159)
		Twitter reactions of 25 people who just googled "Santorum" for the first time  (buzzfeed.com)	(142)

(Some Guy)		People with unfortunate names are more likely to be abused and get ill, reports Dave Hitler  (montrealgazette.com)	(197)
(International Business Times UK)		Romans kept it simple. Pay for sex using a coin with two people having sex on it  (uk.ibtimes.com)	(49)
(pri.org)		"14,000 people have checked out this story, most coming from Fark. Fark is a new aggregator looking for the strangest, weirdest, most upsetting or most important news." It's not new, it's Fark. (Item #6)  (pri.org)	(15)

		Debt collectors offering credit cards to people with old, expired debts so they can trap them in an unending nightmare  (finance.yahoo.com)	(112)
		Embattled Sears hires former Brookstone CEO. Because if anyone can convince people to buy useless crap like USB-powered nose hair trimmers with integrated coffee mug warmer, it's Brookstone  (nytimes.com)	(42)

(McRumors)		Developer learns that if you allow random anonymous people share thoughts and pictures with other random anonymous people, Goatse will flourish worse than bed bugs  (macrumors.com)	(50)
		A look at just who votes in Iowa's Republican caucus. Yes, they're mostly old white people  (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(44)
(AFP)		Right now, six people running for the job of the leader of the most powerful nation on earth are trying desperately to convince voters that they don't believe in science and won't govern based on it  (thejakartaglobe.com)	(511)
(Some Soldier)		Military is advertising on every Google search for "Military is". Meanwhile, Google's auto-complete suggests "Military is for uneducated people... is stupid... is a cult... is socialist" directly above the ad  (freethoughtblogs.com)	(50)

		Fat parents don't want people telling their fat kids they're fat  (ajc.com)	(190)
		According to the people who put their money where their mouth is Obama is 54% likely to be elected, Dems have only a 20% chance of keeping the Senate but they've now got a 33% shot at taking the House. So bet the over  (news.yahoo.com)	(94)
		How to piss people off: 1. Perform most beloved song of beloved artist on national TV. 2. Change most important lyric, thus changing the entire meaning of song. 3. Get progressively more irate at fans on Twitter. Forget you, Cee Lo Green  (huffingtonpost.com)	(240)
		British government considers limiting subsidized housing to people making under $150,000 per year  (bbc.co.uk)	(33)
		Rule 42: If enough stoned people post videos to the internet, eventually one will be a guy playing guitar with a Jack Russell puppy on his head  (liveleak.com)	(15)

		Newt Gingrich is back to his old tricks, demanding people resign and whatnot. If he keeps this up, he's going to lose his Speakership for sure  (livewire.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(46)
		Melany is the only person in Seattle harvesting squirrels for protein. In other news, people eat squirrels  (seattletimes.nwsource.com)	(230)
(Romenesko)		New newspaper owners tell their handful of remaining reporters to quit dressing like reporters, because it's important to look properly corporate while interviewing people in the middle of fighting a wildfire  (jimromenesko.com)	(44)
		The latest organization to join the list of people conspiring against the GOP, and therefore, America is *spins wheel* The Girl Scouts  (mediamatters.org)	(134)

(AccuWeather)		Sea foam looks more like faux snow. Seriously, people in the UK are sliding around like crazy in a sea foam blizzard. This isn't snow, it's sea foam  (accuweather.com)	(42)
		Federal appeals court rules that corporations are very very special kinds of people that don't get sent to jail like ordinary people do  (businessweek.com)	(118)
		A cry of noooooooooooo was heard throughout the net after 600 pound woman shuts down her website where people paid $19 a month to watch her eat because now she wants to lose weight  (msnbc.msn.com)	(95)

		"LinkedIn is like going to a school reunion with the people you'd hoped to avoid all your life." Oh, c'mon, it's not THAT bad--OK, the author's got a point  (blogs.telegraph.co.uk)	(40)
		Six weird cities people actually live in. Notably absent: Detroit  (cracked.com)	(48)
		Newt and Callista Gingrich will have an interview in People Magazine, which has clearly expanded from covering people to anything temporarily taking human form  (politico.com)	(149)
		A One-Horse Town Down to Two People: Messex, Colorado, has been largely abandoned, and its only residents like it that way; 'We Get Along OK'  (finance.yahoo.com)	(56)
		Reagan's son endorses Gingrich. For he gave his son to us, to sacrifice his political credibility to forgive the sins of all Republicans. Glory to Reagan in the highest. And peace to his people on Earth   (livewire.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(76)

		Townspeople cut down trees in order to save local environment  (pennlive.com)	(49)
		Of all the things crazy people have believed Jesus told them to do, none have been so mediocre and confusing as this  (rgj.com)	(61)
		Poll finds that people would rather live next door to religious zealots than obnoxious douche bags  (bottomline.msnbc.msn.com)	(93)
		Romero Institute of Consumer Trends finds that people who shop online while drunk tend to buy more. Subby plans to finish article after completing order of glow skull soap and pickle lip balm from the FARK Shop  (nytimes.com)	(37)
		AZ judge says school district's ethnic studies program is illegal because teaching Hispanics how badly the state has screwed them over in the past might lead to "resentments" against white people  (news.yahoo.com)	(127)
		Putin plans series of fire side chats with the Russian people because Franklin Roosevelt would never rig an election, or something  (dailymail.co.uk)	(29)
		2 people killed, 4 others injured in shooting at Church's Chicken. *pew*pew*pew*  (suntimes.com)	(62)

		Ten science fiction movies for people who don't like science fiction movies  (io9.com)	(121)
(Unicorn Booty)		Taylor Lautner's People Magazine 'Coming Out' Issue Goes Viral Even Though He's Not Gay  (unicornbooty.com)	(47)
		Let me stress that RON PAUL is not a homophobe or a racist. He simply doesn't like to use their bathrooms or have people speak spanish around him  (huffingtonpost.com)	(159)

		Old people complain about the work ethic of the younger generation, yell at clouds  (chicagotribune.com)	(344)
		If you've got a group of people passing around a loaded shotgun to pose for pictures, you just know someone's going to get shot  (qctimes.com)	(98)
(Some Londoner)		Want to see a city completely empty of people? Try London on Christmas morning  (ianvisits.co.uk)	(66)

		Most people's Christmas displays don't contain an F-104 Starfighter. But then, Tom Blair is not most people  (baltimoresun.com)	(52)
		What people wanted for Christmas... in 1975  (buzzfeed.com)	(224)
		More people are wanting an official Red Ryder carbine-action two-hundred-shot range model air rifle under their Christmas tree this year  (ajc.com)	(82)
		Study finds people would much rather travel alongside someone with bad body odour than parents with crying kids  (nzherald.co.nz)	(63)
		Author of "Scroogenomics: Why You Shouldn't Buy Presents for the Holidays," Compares Christmas shopping to the Homer Simpson theory of why people do things: "It's because they're stupid, that's why"  (foxbusiness.com)	(72)

		People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, unless they bought it for $14.1m. Then they can do whatever the hell they want  (dailymail.co.uk)	(52)
		The controversy over his newletters has caused Ron Paul's popularity to surge among certain parts of the electorate. Unfortunately for him, it's the parts made up of people that shout things like "white power"  (theatlanticwire.com)	(370)
		John Boehner: "If you can get this fixed, why not uh, why not do the right thing for the American people - even though it's not exactly what we want?"  (talkingpointsmemo.com)	(114)
		Cafe owner posts sign of himself threatening Santa with a knife, saying "Eat here or the old bastard gets it". Surprisingly, some people have a problem with this  (dailymail.co.uk)	(34)

		Even when it comes to sending cards wishing people Happy Holidays, Fox News can't resist being a dick about it  (news.yahoo.com)	(69)
(Some Guy)		Perhaps the only thing more obnoxious than people who spend a small fortune each year on Christmas presents for their children are the people who spend a small fortune on presents for their pets. "He's getting a costume and a hat"  (ktar.com)	(122)
		Self-employed people feel best about their jobs. Too bad their bosses suck  (chinadaily.com.cn)	(35)
		Experts say high prices for low quality are keeping people from buying tickets at box office. Researchers still puzzled how Indianapolis Colts keep playing to a full house  (foxnews.com)	(46)
		Online shopping hits record $6.3 billion last week as half of people making purchases actually used their own credit cards  (news.cnet.com)	(12)
		Several massive explosions rip through Not Our Problem Anymore, killing {we are no longer required to care} people  (news.yahoo.com)	(356)
		The complete guide on how to give people the Christmas presents they actually want  (slate.com)	(83)

		If you talk to people about jury nullification, this prosecutor will seek to have you jailed for six months. Subby wonders what the prosecutor might do to anyone who talks about the First Amendment  (nytimes.com)	(307)
		Jesuslovesme and Awesome among the baby names registered in Scotland this year. Why can't people use traditional names like Dòmhnallaidh and Slàinidh?  (dailyrecord.co.uk)	(52)
		Penguins poo on people in line to see the Pandas at the Edinburgh in a tale of monochrome jealously  (bbc.co.uk)	(13)
		Brooke Mueller doesn't want TMZ to bother her. I guess it's true what they say about coke, it changes people  (tmz.com)	(16)

		NPR readers would ratify four amendments to the Constitution, which can be summarized as "they want it to read 'We the people' instead of 'We the corporations'"  (npr.org)	(242)
		Scottish Premier League wants to create "safe-standing areas" in stadiums, though the thought of thousands of people standing and leaping about in seated areas worries them  (guardian.co.uk)	(16)
(gather.com)		"This whole incident is reminiscent of a meme popular on Fark.com - when someone dies, people will post the message "RIP,______,"  (celebs.gather.com)	(12)
		Lady Gaga's Twitter account hacked. People were tipped off by a lack of condescending self-righteousness in her tweets  (starpulse.com)	(27)

		Yet another reason why people west of the Hudson think New Yorkers are nuts: $36,000 a year for kindergarten. Bonus: admissions director is named Babby  (nytimes.com)	(151)
		Immediately after middle aged people take medicine, they like to go outside and barbecue, and other things I've learned from commercials  (huffingtonpost.com)	(187)
		When the revolution comes, it won't be started by protestors in city parks, it will come from people like residents of Jefferson County, AL, who, thanks to JP Morgan, now have to choose between affording electricity or running water  (news.yahoo.com)	(389)
		Store sells out of canned reindeer meat after protesters make people aware that there's such a thing as canned reindeer meat available to buy  (bottomline.msnbc.msn.com)	(23)
		People utterly defeated by an escalator  (liveleak.com)	(80)

Members of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster will be erecting their holiday display this weekend at the Loudoun County, VA Courthouse. Naturally, some people have a problem with this  (washingtonpost.com)

(439)

		"Fox News' brash, snarktabulous star of Red Eye, Greg Gutfeld... divulged his secrets on how to keep people awake, his love of British pop culture, affinity for sludge metal and predilection for the news aggregator site Fark"  (mediaite.com)	(13)
(CBS)		Two people hunting for scrap metal at nursing home score a ton of building supplies  (detroit.cbslocal.com)	(59)
(Texas Tribune)		Rick Perry retired back in January 2011 to boost his pension pay, thinks that people have been calling him a "retired" for months  (texastribune.org)	(50)
		Google Chrome passes Internet Explorer in popularity. In other news, people still use Internet Explorer  (chicagotribune.com)	(99)
		Putin puts a Playboy model in the Parliament. If this doesn't get more young people involved in politics, then it at least will wear out the arms of all the other male MPs  (dailymail.co.uk)	(57)
		I had a horrifying dream that middle-aged people who could not distinguish between a domain name and an IP address were trying to regulate the Internet. Then I woke up and the Judiciary Committee's SOPA hearings were on  (washingtonpost.com)	(378)

		Louis CK's DRM-free direct-sales video experiment pays off: "I really hope people keep buying it a lot, so I can have shiatloads of money"  (boingboing.net)	(97)
		The Wall Street Journal will stop using "GOP" to refer to the Republican party because people who read the WSJ don't know what it means  (cbsnews.com)	(209)
		Sandusky's lawyer: "Teaching a person to shower at the age of 12 or 14 sounds strange to some people ... like how to put soap on their body." ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  (content.usatoday.com)	(172)
		Is the government lying to us about the economy? Unemployment is down (because people stopped looking for work) and consumer spending is slightly off (because people are living out of their cars)  (marketwatch.com)	(71)
		Yes, frat boys, we know you like rape. But creating a "who would you rape" survey for your brothers to take online will probably strike some people as inappropriate  (cnn.com)	(149)
		New study finds people read their cell phones rather than newspapers. Americans find it's much more convenient when they have to drive  (technolog.msnbc.msn.com)	(8)

(Some Guy)		During November and December of last year over 13,000 people were treated in ERs nationwide due to injuries involving holiday decorations. If there is a "war on Christmas" I'd say Christmas is winning  (emaxhealth.com)	(44)
		The 20 unhappiest people you meet in the comments sections of year end lists, now taking your questions to the right  (npr.org)	(103)
		Drew Curtis is one of the 25 most viral people on the internet. There's a pill for that, right?  (gizmodo.com)	(11)
		The earthquake in Haiti may not have been a natural disaster. I knew the mole people were behind this  (mnn.com)	(115)
(Some Guy)		If your nickname is 'Bang Bang,' try not to leave a backpack with half your name written on it at the train station. It might cause people to freak out . "It had the name 'Bang' on it"  (couriermail.com.au)	(84)
		Increasing numbers of students are turning to lap dancing and prostitution to pay their way through university. Amazingly, some people have a problem with this  (dailymail.co.uk)	(613)

		What might socialized medicine cost? Try over $300,000 in four years for removing ugly tattoos from stupid people  (thesun.co.uk)	(142)
		An impassioned manifesto against people who clip their nails in public. "You littered with your body parts"  (blog.trutv.com)	(144)

		New study says that enjoying the misfortune of others makes people feel better about themselves. In other news, NFL fans always happy when the Colts are playing their team  (bodyodd.msnbc.msn.com)	(33)
		Hacker who caused the National Emergency Alert System to send out a text telling NJ cell phone users to "seek shelter immediately" due to the "extreme threat to life" owes a few thousand people new underwear  (ireport.cnn.com)	(176)
(The Local Norway)		Butter priced at $515 a pack on Norway's black market as demand soars. What's smør, people are willing to pay for it  (thelocal.no)	(111)

		St Paul police are comfortable with city notification method which has let city keep $515,497 which can be refunded to people whose cars were towed and sold  (startribune.com)	(86)
		"Invented people" respond that Gingrich is a 100% authentic ignorant, racist, cracker  (news.yahoo.com)	(279)
		Snooping on people is making you fat  (today.msnbc.msn.com)	(36)
		Large firms are no longer just sitting on their cash and not hiring people, they are increasingly stiffing small businesses for payment owed on services and products  (sfgate.com)	(148)

		New Gallup poll says that Americans consider making $150,000 a year to be rich. However for most people, it just gets them back to even  (huffingtonpost.com)	(261)
		Senator demands Apple pull app that allows people to make fake, totally unrealistic driver's licenses. So if you want to be an Irish R&B singer/organ donor named McLovin, act fast  (consumerist.com)	(84)

		Gingrich says that the Palestinians are an "invented" people and have no right to a state of their own  (washingtonpost.com)	(386)
(Therepublic.com)		Teacher strips and hoses down pre-kindergarten student outside of school for soiling his pants. Some people have a problem with this  (therepublic.com)	(106)
		James Cameron sued by man who claims to have created the idea for Avatar in 1997. Apparently, "blue people in 3-D" was unheard of until then  (tmz.com)	(46)

		Senate Republicans filibuster tax cut because it doesn't overwhelmingly benefit rich people  (tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(244)
		If enough people "throw their vote away" and vote for a third party, we might actually have real change  (thedailybeast.com)	(221)

(Some Guys)		Photoshop these people on pipes   (latimesphoto.files.wordpress.com)	(21)
		Students offered free alcoholic beverages in exchange for donating blood. Surprisingly, some people - who have obviously never had the one-beer-post-blood-donation buzz - have a problem with this  (mirror.co.uk)	(26)
		Scientist pours cold water on the hype that Kepler-22b may be home to beautiful blue skinned cat people who want to have sex with you  (blogs.telegraph.co.uk)	(127)
(Some Guy)		The representatives of the people are annoyed that the people they represent are actually showing up and demanding representation. Without a suitcase full of money even. Of all the nerve  (voanews.com)	(315)

		BeautifulPeople.com is thrown off of eBay for auctioning a date with the Virgin Mary. Still no word on your chances with that hot little number in the center wearing the fur coat  (telegraph.co.uk)	(29)
(Pundit Kitchen)		Problem: people stealing hammers meant for breaking glass in the event of an accident. Solution: the buses in Heilongjiang, China are now equipped with emergency bricks  (news.icanhascheezburger.com)	(28)
		Dog people vs. cat people. Yeah, it's pretty much what you expected  (shine.yahoo.com)	(325)
		Can't hold your liquor? You can get away with beating people up in the UK and blame it on your religion prohibiting alcohol  (dailymail.co.uk)	(66)
(Regretsy)		I'd love to give you that new fire truck, Timmy, but PayPal says cats are more important than people in need  (regretsy.com)	(131)
		A lesson in political reporting. 2004: A 5.7% unemployment rate with 300,000 people leaving the workplace equals "Lost Hope." 2011: An 8.6% unemployment rate with 315,000 people leaving the workplace equals "Raising Hopes"  (boortz.com)	(110)

		Republican lawmakers: "People receiving public funds should be regularly drug tested." Democratic lawmaker: "You mean like legislators? Good idea"  (ajc.com)	(205)
		Ain't no party like a Lehigh University rave party 'cause a Lehigh University rave party don't stop until 35 people are hospitalized in a "mass casualty incident"  (mcall.com)	(49)
(Topless Robot)		Having trouble keeping your films synched with RiffTrax? The good people at RiffTrax have a solution (and it's totally free)  (toplessrobot.com)	(98)
		India, a country with the population of a billion people, asks Google, Facebook and Twitter to screen all of the content posted to their sites. Yes, all of it. No really, they're serious  (india.blogs.nytimes.com)	(77)
		Suddenly it hit me: People who smack their children are afraid to admit it because it has become socially unacceptable  (news.com.au)	(291)
(Some Guy)		In the US, people tend to leave electronics behind in cabs. In France it's their clothes. And in London it's a dead donkey  (thechronicle.com.au)	(17)

(The Real Ric Romero)		"Homeowners everywhere are anxious to hire work crews to cut up those limbs and branches... But a word of caution: Hiring the wrong people could actually do more harm than good." I'm intrigued by your insight, Ric Romero  (abclocal.go.com)	(25)
		Michele Bachmann: "Occupy Wall Street just wants people to pay for their stuff"  (huffingtonpost.com)	(279)
		Kourtney Kardashian in bitter Twitter feud with 'Teen Mom' star. This is what our culture has fallen to, people. Weep for America  (content.usatoday.com)	(63)

(Some Guy)		Study: People trust atheists about as much as they do rapists. "There's this persistent belief that people behave better if they feel like God is watching them." Oh for God's sake  (theblaze.com)	(645)
		Studies show that most people under the age of 30 go on the internet just to waste time. But if you're reading this headline, you already knew that  (latimesblogs.latimes.com)	(28)

(Travel + Leisure)		Cities with America's strangest people. The list could very easily be called "Where the liberals at?" instead  (travelandleisure.com)	(194)
		If same-sex marriage is permitted, Bachmann's Iowa co-chair warns, next people will want to marry inanimate objects, such as the Eiffel tower. Personally, I'm more of an Arc de Triomphe guy  (thinkprogress.org)	(180)
		In a sure sign of Barbara Walters' future battles with dementia, the Kardashians make her list of the 10 Most Fascinating People of 2011  (news.yahoo.com)	(32)

		Latinos demand investigation in death of border agent Brian Terry. Claim misinformation was used to get people all riled up about illegal immigration  (examiner.com)	(149)
(BGR)		IPride 4S deemed best iPride yet by people that didn't sell their families to get it  (bgr.com)	(19)
		Fox president all but confirms Prometheus is an alien prequel, says he's "heartbroken" about the leaked footage. But not as heartbroken as the people who watched it expecting some excitement  (avclub.com)	(28)
		Public library mad because homeless people are watching porn on the computers. Article does not disclose what the hell else libraries are good for  (ktla.com)	(49)
		Mitt Romney was a real people person back in 1994. No word on he changed his stance on that too  (gawker.com)	(11)
		So you know how conservatives blame the people who took the subprime loans for the financial collapse? Well...about that  (thinkprogress.org)	(174)
(Some Guy)		Let's talk about people who aren't in this thread  (usa.gov)	(too many)
		Ok, this is cool, but the overhead shot of miniature people having sex in the field at about the 2:18 mark is creepy...you're not reading this anymore are you?  (gizmodo.com)	(39)

		Movie and TV titles have gotten literal because culturally most people have gotten dumber. Looks like we're not too far away from seeing "ASS" on a theater marquee  (slate.com)	(107)
		Eiffel Tower could become world's largest tree, according to people who think putting plants on metal makes it a tree  (canada.com)	(21)
		USDA gives out record fine to popular traveling circus. In other news, apparently the people who say what you can and cannot use as pesticides on your own damn land have say over entertainment  (cnn.com)	(51)

		Man who carefully planned a mass slaughter, picked a place where it would be unlikely that the people could defend themselves, then carefully and calmly executed 77 people declared "insane", won't face jail time  (cnn.com)	(258)
		Rick Perry thinks the election is November 12th and people under 21 can't vote. Who would have guessed Texas could elect a dumber governor?  (firstread.msnbc.msn.com)	(183)
		VA officials fine with people getting quietly and sadly drunk in bars, but heaven help the owners if they start dancing  (washingtonpost.com)	(66)
		Stop badmouthing stupid jerk sharks that keep biting people  (newscientist.com)	(37)
		Thanksgiving is over. So you know what that means - time for douchebag neighborhood associations to start telling people what color Christmas lights they can't hang on their porch  (myfoxdc.com)	(56)
		Sure, a few patients died. The important thing is that companies have free speech rights. Because they're people just like us  (philly.com)	(64)
(Some Reporter)		News: Reporter finds that most people who investigate foreclosures get scammed. Fark: Including said reporter  (poynter.org)	(24)
		Look, one more time- if you buy a hooker and the sex is no good, do not kidnap her baby and leave it in a field. How many times do we need to go over this, people of Florida?  (jacksonville.com)	(28)

		Barney Frank (D-ead on):"The House under Republican rule consists half of people who think like Michele Bachmann and half of people who are afraid of losing a primary to people who think like Michele Bachmann"   (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(178)
		PBS starts up a channel in England. At last, British people will finally get an opportunity to see Monty Python, Doctor Who, and Fawlty Towers  (nytimes.com)	(117)
		Florida man accused of shooting a lawn mower and brawling with his son tells cops, "Fighting is what redneck people do." Cops concede that, but say blasting a riding mower with a .380 pistol crosses the line  (blogs.tcpalm.com)	(54)
		Believe it or not, rich people can be assholes too  (dailymail.co.uk)	(179)

(WQAD)		Fifteen people showed up to a Michele Bachmann event in Iowa  (wqad.com)	(167)
		Mitt Romney: "I'm not trying to put money in people's pockets." At least he's honest  (thinkprogress.org)	(84)
		Three people face prison time in toilet paper scam. So much for charmin' the judge  (sfgate.com)	(28)

University given an $800,000 grant to study the impact of porn on people's lives. Giggity  (nzherald.co.nz)

(76)

		Police depts aren't interested in solving violent crimes. There's no money to be made. But shaking down people on the street for a joint in their pocket brings dividends  (huffingtonpost.com)	(115)
		"It used to be there was at least some mental safety mechanism, some pause for people before they would resort to the ultimate use of force. That one barrier seems to have disappeared"  (tampabay.com)	(130)
(Houston Press)		A roundup of some of the delightfully named people that have graced the Harris County (Houston) Texas crime rolls. Their torment is your gain  (blogs.houstonpress.com)	(67)
		MSNBC's Ed Shultz named #3 least influential person alive. "The only reason people watch "The Ed Show" is they're working out in a hotel gym and they can't find a staff member to change the channel to ESPN"  (mediabistro.com)	(88)
		"When I saw this list - and especially the last agenda item - the scales fell from my eyes. Of course these unarmed people would be having the shiat kicked out of them." Syria? Egypt? Guess again  (guardian.co.uk)	(888)

(Some Guy)		What bad economy? Survival shop reports increase of sales to people preparing for 'possible collapse of society'  (stlouis.cbslocal.com)	(192)
(PhillyBurbs)		Good: State lets gambling addicts add themselves to list of people barred from casinos. Bad: Casinos let them in anyway, then seize their winnings because they're on the list  (phillyburbs.com)	(56)
		All of you weird Fark people are sort of like family members, in a way. So which weird family member are you?  (fark.com)	(411)

(CFRA)		Occupy Ottawa demonstration broken up by Canadian police in unspeakable orgy of violence: Eight people received tickets, one was helped to hospital and three others had their feelings temporarily hurt  (cfra.com)	(167)
		What better way to endear your fun carnival ride to all the Jewish people in South Florida than to name it after a poison gas used in the Holocaust?  (miamiherald.com)	(177)

		How people are fooled by evidence. You're going to glove this article  (scientificamerican.com)	(23)
		Sometimes it's best not to let people know you're frustrated at having a small penis  (boston.com)	(40)
		Facebook is working on new smartphone "to bring powerful social experiences to more people around the world" ...like playing Farmville  (thestar.com)	(15)
(Some WV Guy)		MTV: How about a new reality show where we follow young people through the woods with high powered rifles? BRILLIANT  (wvgazette.com)	(51)
		If you left a suitcase with $1 million in a restaurant in Sydney, the police would like a word with you. The people you were supposed to give it to would like to give you something, too  (news.yahoo.com)	(27)

		Egypt's new boss quits amid protests, now it's up to the people to find a newer boss again, hopefully not the same as the last new boss  (cnn.com)	(37)
		Vladimir Putin booed by crowd of people who have gone mysteriously missing  (canada.com)	(41)
		New research validates how foods affect genetic expression at the cellular level. Unfortunately, this isn't very good news for people with mozzarella blood type  (marketwatch.com)	(17)
		Statisticians can prove almost anything. 68% of all people already knew that  (news.nationalpost.com)	(53)
		"They are the "Participation Ribbon People" - a generation rewarded and praised simply for showing up. The result of social promotion, time-outs over spanking and the misguided concept that reward is deserved and not earned"  (townhall.com)	(428)
		Cool interactive map- are people migrating to or from your location?  (forbes.com)	(74)

Rick Santorum doesn't really believe Obama's a Muslim, but he refuses to correct people who believe that falsehood   (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com)

(115)

		Golden Corral is open for Thanksgiving. Discover how food tastes when it is prepared and eaten solely by people who are utterly unloved and alone  (kansas.com)	(178)
(Some Guy)		More people now LoLing than WoWing  (pcgamer.com)	(131)
		Research finds blood type affects risk of stroke. Most in danger are people whose blood type is either AB, B or Slurpee  (yourlife.usatoday.com)	(12)

		Bank of America: We're sorry we gave your $59,000 to someone with the same name, it's an honest mistake, a lot of people in this country have the same exact name. Konstantinos Alexopoulos: O RLY??  (huffingtonpost.com)	(53)
		Some people think its stupid to swim in piranha infested waters. Then there are the toeless Brazilians  (msnbc.msn.com)	(54)
		When it comes to retiring for most older people in the workforce, the new reality is: 80 is the new 65  (ca.news.yahoo.com)	(201)

(Studies in Crap)		A Lesson in Copyright: One of these erotic mermaid romance novels stars a little mermaid named "Marielle" who just wants to be where the people are ... doin' it  (blogs.sfweekly.com)	(24)
		Key witness in Jerry Sandusky sex abuse case changes his story about shower incident after costing four people their jobs. Hopefully they're not butthurt over it  (pennlive.com)	(323)

People that have the "kindness gene" are known to be far more kind and caring than people without it, according to the "Give me a hug" Institute  (ca.news.yahoo.com)

(161)

		"Glee" star Lauren Potter is down with President Obama's Committee for People With Intellectual Disabilities  (starpulse.com)	(65)
		Herman Cain: "A manly man don't want it piled high with vegetables. He would call that a sissy pizza." There are people out there who want this man to be leader of the free world? YIKES  (rawstory.com)	(278)
		The percentage of people who lose their jobs due to "Job killing regulations" last year: 0.3%  (washingtonpost.com)	(148)
		Many people who claim there won't be social security when they retire say they plan to invest wisely now. Others say they will keep working beyond age 65. Then there's this guy  (dailymail.co.uk)	(46)
		Last night's time-travel-centric episode of Family Guy saw the world changed--for the worse--if 9/11 didn't happen. Naturally, people have a problem with this  (deadline.com)	(108)
		The video game industry's high score for the year is between the people who put ASS and POO as their initials  (latimesblogs.latimes.com)	(57)
		Beautiful people are more successful, more productive, more annoying  (smh.com.au)	(58)
		Good news: Silicon Valley job fair features Amazon, Accenture, other large tech firms. Fark: They're hiring people for jobs in India  (boingboing.net)	(35)

		In case you forgot the lesson taught by the extinction of the western black rhino, here are some African elephants to remind you that people suck  (sciencedaily.com)	(16)
		CNN explores whether the government should read people's minds. Stay tuned for next week's analysis on whether flying pigs should be bound by conventional aviation rules  (religion.blogs.cnn.com)	(49)
		CBS sends out email warning people that Michele Bachmann won't get any questions because she no longer stands a chance at securing the GOP nomination. Unfortunately, they sent the email to her staff as well  (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(91)
		Actor Peter Dinklage is a wee bit upset with most roles out there for little people  (iheartchaos.com)	(90)

The Sun directs 60,000 people to new jobs. The Sun is there  (thesun.co.uk)

(5)

		Type 2 diabetes more common among skinny, young people  (msnbc.msn.com)	(44)
(Some Guy)		Aussies consider establishing an alcohol free zone in Woolloomoolloo. Thousands of people named Bruce to march in protest  (starobserver.com.au)	(47)
		HAWAII helicopter crash kills FIVE people - anOther report of ground damage WITH injuries, or a hiJACKed plane were wrong, thank the LORD  (cnn.com)	(39)
		Amazing low-tech device pulls water from even arid desert air using no power. Cool, the water problem's solved, let's get back to bombing people  (iheartchaos.com)	(151)

		Apparently corporations ARE people, as Coca-Cola now seems to have a seat on the board of the National Park Foundation  (news.yahoo.com)	(50)
(NME)		Queen: "We've endured because we speak for common people." That, and Brian May saved the life of a brain-damaged hedgehog  (nme.com)	(69)
		When people are laughing at you for NOT dressing up like a pimp, you know you might have a credibility problem  (gawker.com)	(62)
		Herman Cain's defense: "There are thousands of people who say I never harassed them"  (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(253)
(barons)		Ralph Lauren forecasts weaker sales after realizing that people are tired of paying $30 for a pair of socks  (blogs.barrons.com)	(21)
		Even in Texas, you're not allowed to attack random people who happen to drive past your house if it has been broken into  (msnbc.msn.com)	(33)

Supporters of the MS "Personhood" ballot initiative say they're not going to let a little thing like the clearly and overwhelmingly expressed will of the people stop them from trying again to get the law passed in other ways  (news.yahoo.com)

(150)

		International Atomic Energy Agency releases a 25-page report detailing how they were the last people in the world to realize Iran is trying to make nuclear weapons  (bbc.co.uk)	(128)
		Surprisingly, some people have a problem with an escort agency offering up the virginity of a teenage girl for $15,400  (myfoxdc.com)	(232)
(TheXLog.com)		Of all people bashing Tony Romo's relationship status, it shouldn't be Tiki Barber  (thexlog.com)	(11)
		Remember the Microsoft Courier? It was like the iPad for Productive People ... Here's why Microsoft killed it  (news.cnet.com)	(182)
		In Florida, it only makes news when people AREN'T stupid enough to fall for phone scams  (sun-sentinel.com)	(8)
		Mississippi's proposed new law defining a fertilized egg as a person could force coroners to investigate miscarriages and allow people to sue on behalf of an egg that didn't implant in the uterus due to birth control  (huffingtonpost.com)	(209)

		In Kentucky, there are now more barrels of bourbon than there are people  (abcnews.go.com)	(78)
		Canadian Security Intelligence Service could soon be allowed to spy overseas, which is bad news for the people running Iran's secret maple syrup reactors   (fullcomment.nationalpost.com)	(30)
		We were so close, people. We were so close  (showbizspy.com)	(45)
		Wells Fargo actively courting the 1%, making a special bank for people with $50 million or more to their name  (consumerist.com)	(195)

		America's employment situation is so bad that most people on unemployment aren't collecting benefits anymore. Which means technically they aren't unemployed. Success  (seattlepi.com)	(80)
		Six days without power, and people are starting to get pissed. For some damned reason AP thinks this is news  (hosted.ap.org)	(154)

		Really cheap people recycle tea bags three times over. The Sun is there  (thesun.co.uk)	(168)
		Study finds most people have a bunch of facebook friends but only two pals that are really close to you  (vitals.msnbc.msn.com)	(159)
		Most people don't ride their motorcycle through Western Syria in the middle of an uprising. But most people aren't this dude  (foreignpolicy.com)	(34)

		People, for the last time: Portable gas-powered generators are for EXTERNAL USE ONLY  (nj.com)	(75)
		"Precious" star Gabourey Sidibe has a Twitter imposter. The twist: She's nicer than Gabourey: "My mom was like, 'Wait, people like her, she's lovely, I'm going to follow her'"  (starpulse.com)	(37)
		People still like looking at their clocks in public  (washingtonpost.com)	(110)
		Obama tops Forbes' list of world's most powerful people, narrowly edging out Ryan Seacrest  (content.usatoday.com)	(17)
		Your WTF video of the day involved two siblings doing a sword dance while grandma and the dog watch intently. This is the dance of somebody's people  (iheartchaos.com)	(37)
		Canadian politician tells joke about calling a suicide hotline whose call center was in Pakistan, saying they asked him if he could drive a truck. Apparently, some people have a problem with this  (cbc.ca)	(114)
		3.5 million people still working their way through their stacks of free AOL trial cds  (gizmodo.com)	(69)

		Rude people have better credit scores, you retarded douchebag  (sciencedaily.com)	(45)
		92-year-old veteran stands at attention and addresses the Snowpocalypse power crisis: "All I'm saying is the system is wrong. They should have a priority list. There are people out there worse than me"  (ctnow.com)	(56)
		1 in 15 people is now the 99%. Shouldn't it be 14.9 out of 15?  (finance.yahoo.com)	(60)
		Rush Limbaugh on the allegations against Herman Cain: "Sexual Harassment is a political tool of the left to get rid of people or to score money gains"  (littlegreenfootballs.com)	(240)

People rationalize when they have no choices, and rebel when they think they have an out. Although the Fark greenlight system is sometimes capricious, I think it works pretty well over all  (sciencedaily.com)

(5)

		Old people today have more sex. Hey, come back, don't you want the rest of your grilled cheese sandwich?   (timesofindia.indiatimes.com)	(101)
(Some Guy)		Baltimore's original NFL franchise certificate found in trash and restored. Art Modell still wanted by people in Cleveland for Libyan dictator-style questioning   (sportscollectorsdaily.com)	(42)
		The Dominique Strauss-Kahn sex scandal is being given the porno treatment. Naturally, some people have a problem with this  (huffingtonpost.com)	(24)
		Greek president: "Let the people decide." European markets: "F*ck that"  (bbc.co.uk)	(270)
(Some Guy)		Sheriff: Time for Citizens to Arm Themselves, People are tired of doing the right thing and criminals getting away with their actions  (wyff4.com)	(272)
		White people occupy Wall Street *like this,* and black people occupy Wall Street *like this*  (huffingtonpost.com)	(47)

		NYPD might be sending drunk and aggressive homeless people to the Occupy Wall Street park in order to discredit the movement. Protesters can't kick them out because... well, they're the 99%, too  (gawker.com)	(605)
		Some people will do anything for beer, including breaking into apartments and stabbing people with corkscrews when they fight back  (chicagotribune.com)	(24)

		You can be part of the 1% that gets to ski down the Aspen slopes before the rest of the unwashed masses for only $25,000  (denverpost.com)	(86)
		Obama gives more free handouts to people who didn't work for them  (washingtonpost.com)	(159)
		NY "foreclosure mill" tones down its Halloween celebrations in light of the terrible economy. Just kidding - they throw a party and dress up as homeless people and mock foreclosed homeowners  (nytimes.com)	(430)

		And now for a Mormon who got people stormin' over children adornin' themselves - the church is now messing with children cross dressing and won't allow unisex elves  (foxnews.com)	(159)
		US Border Patrol stops routinely searching buses, trains and airports for illegal immigrants at transportation hubs along the northern border that's been great for tracking down people here illegally. Psst: It's now ok, illegals  (hosted.ap.org)	(121)
(Some Guy)		Powerful storm could impact 60 million people on the East Coast. Brought to you by Home Depot, Lowes and others with last year model snow blowers  (accuweather.com)	(207)
		Actual headline: "Ten Inappropriately Sexy Cartoon Characters." Um...people find cartoons sexy? Really?  (hollywoodreporter.com)	(285)
(Some Banker)		Some people are happy if they find a few coins in their couch cushions, Germany just found 55 billion Euro hidden by an accounting error  (moneycontrol.com)	(30)
		James Carville rates Rick Perry's campaign performance: "It's gotten so bad, people in Louisiana are actually starting to make Texas jokes...If this thing gets any worse, the people in Mississippi will be making Texas jokes"  (cnn.com)	(105)

		Chicago to make Lake Shore Drive safer during blizzards, because warning people for two days that they'll get stuck on it didn't work last year  (chicagotribune.com)	(40)
		Thirteen manipulative sex institutions and how people are controlled within. Subby's domestic partnership strangely absent from the list  (trutv.com)	(86)
		NRO profiles heroic smoker-patriot Mark Block. What is it with conservative men and Marlboro Lights? Don't they know the only people who smoke them are women and European DJs? He may as well be wearing a skirt and twirling a glow stick  (nationalreview.com)	(71)
		More people Googled "Occupy Wall Street" than "Tea Party" last month on Google. Ergo, the Occupy movement is more popular than the Tea Party  (salon.com)	(203)
		Working for a haunted house can be fun. You get to dress up in cool makeup, scare people, and rarely have to tend to a broken nose when people attack you  (huffingtonpost.com)	(69)
		Libtard blasts GOP presidential candidates: "The American people want solutions. You're providing comedy." And by libtard, I mean neoconservative stalwart John Podhoretz  (nypost.com)	(83)

(I has it)		Photoshop theme: Rich things for poor people  (i.imgur.com)	(25)
(Some Guy)		If you're tired of people planking and owling, there is only one solution. Start Tebowing  (tebowing.com)	(73)
		Oh the people on the bus go up and down, up and down, up and down  (thesmokinggun.com)	(55)
(Some Guy)		Jessica Simpson tweets a picture for people with a very specific fetish  (holymoly.com)	(45)
		Apparently, aliens are more likely to abduct people who eat a lot of cheese  (dailymail.co.uk)	(64)

		Spielberg: "Don't blame George. That was my silly idea. People stopped saying 'jump the shark'. They now say, 'nuked the fridge'. I'm proud of that"  (popwatch.ew.com)	(147)
		The NYPD is shadowing two types of people: Those with American-sounding names, and those with foreign-sounding names  (nj.com)	(54)
		World Bank calls for safety net for poor people. Republicans call for lowering the net to the floor and installing steel spikes  (finance.yahoo.com)	(35)
		Not news: Young people running up gambling debts. News: Police fear they could be forced into shoplifting and street-fighting. Fark: Gamblers are aged five, playing marbles  (thisisplymouth.co.uk)	(43)
		"Live grenade found in office safe" Glad to hear the grenade is safe, what about the people in the office?  (chicagotribune.com)	(19)
		Despite doing absolutely nothing, Herman Cain and Newt Gingrich are polling well in Iowa, proving once and for all the Midwest loves lazy people  (slate.com)	(111)
		So, the top ten baby names right now include Atticus and Katniss. To Kill a Mockingbird and The Hunger Games. At least people are using books  (huffingtonpost.com)	(220)
(Sciencemag)		And when he had opened the eighth seal, I saw eight colors of lint envelop the world and eight angels did sneeze and flood the world with wrathful snot, and the people did PANIC  (news.sciencemag.org)	(19)

		"So if corporations are people too, why do they sometimes have to be such schmucks?"  (latimes.com)	(203)
(Some Guy)		Rick Perry doesn't care about rich people; replied "I don't care about that." when asked about why his new flat tax plan essentially being a giveaway to the uber-wealthy  (wfaa.com)	(80)
(Some Guy)		You live next door to a sex offender. 23 people like this  (watertowndailytimes.com)	(96)
(Patch.com)		Comcast, Verizon ordered to disclose over 100 customer records of people who illegally downloaded pornographic movies back in---hang on, someone's at the door  (pikesville.patch.com)	(84)
		Juan Williams: "People are fed up with pledges that enforce far right or far left orthodoxy and being told they lack a spine when they listen to the other side of an argument or call for a political compromise to reach a solution"  (thehill.com)	(232)
		Obama administration struggling with the thorny question of whether scientists should inject healthy children with the anthrax vaccine to see if it protects them against a bioterrorism attack. Yeah, some people have issues with this  (washingtonpost.com)	(79)

(Some Guy)		"A number of people would have been outraged if Timothy McVeigh had made it to Canada after the Oklahoma City bombing and the President had taken him out with a drone, without a trial"  (motionsonline.org)	(249)
(Some Cheesehead)		Wisconsin town wants to ban cyclists and pedestrians from using public roads unless they register their travel plans in advance. In other news, there's a place in Wisconsin where people are fit enough to bike or walk  (articles.businessinsider.com)	(151)
(Some Guy)		Study: Obese people don't weigh down healthcare system  (610wiod.com)	(183)
(Morning Sentinal.com)		A Maine man is the first to be documented to have driven a Honda to the million-mile mark, according to a company spokeswoman. "Thankfully, not many people do it, or we'd be out of business"  (kjonline.com)	(98)
		Right Now there are over 5,000 people submitting to Fark. Right Now Drew is crying into his beer somewhere. Right Now, an Admin is frantically redlighting links. Right Now, Oracle is purchasing RightNow  (marketwatch.com)	(12)
(Some Guy)		Most people would simply turn down a bet like this. Most people  (timesheraldonline.com)	(72)
		One third of people stopped paying tickets in Los Angeles County after police commissioner said paying red light camera tickets was voluntary  (thenewspaper.com)	(41)
		You're sailing down the Amazon and come in contact with members of a tribe that have never seen modern people. Do you: A) Approach? B) Back off? C) Leave food? D) HOLY CRAP, THEY'RE SHOOTING ARROWS AT US  (mnn.com)	(165)

		Hayride overturns, injuring 28 people. THAT'S THE LAST STRAW  (ajc.com)	(41)
(Some Guy)		Play at Royal Shakespeare Theatre features nudity, torture by Taser, and rape with sex toys. Surprisingly, some people have a problem with this (safe for work)  (mailonsunday.co.uk)	(55)
		People pay eight times more for fish with a higher prestige name that can only be distinguished from the cheap kind by DNA testing  (boston.com)	(165)
(LA Daily News)		State and national policies on pot are confusing and should be reconciled, say people who are too high to remember that federal law trumps state law  (dailynews.com)	(132)
		This video is for the person who wants to bring out their inner asshole and find out that if they laugh, they will indeed not only go to hell, but own the bus station that charters the buses that drive people to hell. (Not safe for work)  (youtube.com)	(64)
		Old people don't need large homes, so they should be moved somewhere more convenient. OCCUPY YOUR PARENTS HOUSE  (dailymail.co.uk)	(100)

(Some Canuck)		Canada's new crime bill will cost you nine months in jail for passing a joint. This alarms many people, including criminologist Anthony Do... What? Seriously? Ok, yeah, so the guy's name is Doob  (thechronicleherald.ca)	(126)
		With all the publicity about people writing letters to their 16-year old selves, what would you tell your 16-year old self, knowing what you know now?  (fark.com)	(689)
(Some Guy)		On the internet people are debating whether the Gaddafi death pictures are too graphic. I just want him not to decompose before he stars in Weekend at Moammar's  (huffingtonpost.ca)	(60)
		I support your efforts. But I am more about charity. Not so much about you are costing me £23,000 a day, But there are actually poor people to help. But, keep on doing what you're doing. It has always been all about you  (telegraph.co.uk)	(117)
		Yes, people in locker rooms are often naked during interviews. Usually it's the players, though (borderline man-ass pic)  (espn.go.com)	(15)

(Politicususa)		Alan Grayson (D-ude, you nailed it) explains 'Occupy Wall Street' to the people who don't understand why they are protesting. Bonus: It takes him less than a minute  (politicususa.com)	(299)
		Pregnancy makes people do crazy things. Just ask Hilary Duff  (3news.co.nz)	(28)
		Two people detained after tagger shoots at LAPD officers. You're it  (latimesblogs.latimes.com)	(23)
		Cain: "It's not the government's role to tell people what decisions to make." Interviewer: "Even about abortion?" Cain: "Exactly. Aww crap, I forgot I was a GOP candidate"  (wonkette.com)	(222)
		64 People are busted for using pot that is not pot, but it's close enough to pot to be as illegal as pot. Bonus: they were all part of the Navy fleet that buried Osama bin Laden at sea. What a way piss away a career in a puff of smoke  (foxnews.com)	(193)

		As BlackBerries turn out to be lemons, people start switching to Apple  (idealab.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(53)
(Some Guy)		It's taken more than a decade, but Metallica has finally figured out a way to keep people from stealing their music  (loureedmetallica.com)	(75)
		Rick Perry: Herman Cain is like a brother to me. And when I say brother, I don't mean, like, an actual brother, but I mean it like the way black people use it  (huffingtonpost.com)	(135)
		Turns out, the majority of the Occupiers are well-educated, middle class people with crushing student loan debt and represent all nationalities--in short, they are who they say they are  (idealab.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(287)
		People who cherish the American value of liberty over the left-wing value of socioeconomic equality, and those who adhere to Judeo-Christian values, do not regard the existence of economic classes as morally problematic  (nationalreview.com)	(152)
(SoOomMe GuuyY)		Computer games may help people with Parkinson's. Too bad Parkinson's Simulator 2010 was little more than hitting F11 over and over  (medicalxpress.com)	(14)

		A $3 million dollar mobile mansion that does 93mph? This is why people vote against their own economic interests  (gizmag.com)	(48)
		Police have found the man responsible for stealing hundreds of pigs from Iowa farms over the past few months. Some people will do anything for bacon  (desmoinesregister.com)	(33)
		Cain: Banks want to help people but the mean old government won't let them  (thehill.com)	(60)
		US OWS protesters go full Taliban and upset rich people's meals and theater experiences  (crooksandliars.com)	(262)
		Pinheads: People who send Bill O'Reilly's book to troops in Afghanistan in care packages. Patriots: The troops who burn the books  (gawker.com)	(400)
		"My Mom isn't a very smart alcoholic" - Wait... you mean alcohol makes people not smart?  (wesh.com)	(41)
		Researcher: It's impossible to tell whether or not some people's brains are hard-wired for social networking. Also admits Darwin would likely unfriend him over this crap if he were alive  (guardian.co.uk)	(9)
(1065.com)		Deaf people love Foo Fighters. That is not an insult  (1065.com)	(9)

		Actress sues IMDB over it publishing her age. As a bonus, she's doing it so people don't find out her age. I'm sure the lawsuit will not draw any attention to her  (bbc.co.uk)	(80)
(Momentum)		Top 10 list of bicycle movies. To the right, top ten bicyclist-hating rants by people who sound fat  (momentumplanet.com)	(86)
		Success of experimental malaria vaccine is not giving people chills  (washingtonpost.com)	(31)
		9-9-9 plan would raise taxes on most people. Guess who it won't raise taxes on. Go ahead, guess  (chicagotribune.com)	(165)
		Why are people in Moscow always surprised by snow in the winter? Subby has no idea vodka make them forget something like that  (guardian.co.uk)	(31)
(Topless Robot)		The 10 coolest Fisher-Price Little People playsets. Yes, the one in which a giant hamburger can eat Ronald McDonald is here  (toplessrobot.com)	(46)
(Some Guy)		On this day in 1814 more than one million pints of porter was lost. Also, eight people died  (wjla.com)	(12)
		Seasonal jobs that used to go to kids are being snatched up by older people desperate for work  (abcnews.go.com)	(85)

"Look, we saw some amazing people. Scarlett Johansson was great. It was a great audition, I'm telling you. But the thing with Scarlett is, you can't wait for her to take her clothes off"  (huffingtonpost.com)

(62)

		People are lining up in Los Angeles to stuff themselves with foie gras ahead of the coming California foie gras ban. Soon their livers will be rich and succulent  (nytimes.com)	(189)
		Based on how much people are spending on elaborate Halloween props, you would never think the country is on the brink of an economic collapse  (orlandosentinel.com)	(53)
(NME)		1,500 people were duped into spending a total of $60,000 on Motley Crue tickets that didn't exist. That averages out to about $40 a ticket, which is $30 too much for a Motley Crue ticket  (nme.com)	(46)
		Couple films live sex sessions to pay the bills, support their 20-month-old daughter. Surprisingly, some people have a problem with this (w/pics)  (abcnews.go.com)	(145)
		Guns don't kill people, people with Samurai swords whose application for a gun license was rejected kill people  (telegraph.co.uk)	(45)

One industry that hasn't been hurt by the economy? Pork. That's right; even in a recession people can't live without bacon  (blogs.desmoinesregister.com)

(44)

(Karl Rove)		"The president and other Democrats need to remember it's always dangerous to associate with people who are just plain kooky"  (rove.com)	(67)
		"We found out later on that, Constitutionally, you can not ban a type of music," said Ma. "Plus, I, like my opponents said, I didn't really know what was going on"- These are the people making laws  (reason.com)	(123)
		With over 14 million Americans out of work, manufacturers can't understand why people aren't breaking down their doors to apply for an entry-level position that requires 10 years of experience  (cnbc.com)	(182)
		Discover cardholders can now use their cash back at Amazon. In other news, there are people that still use Discover  (usatoday.com)	(30)
(Some Guy)		Seahawks offer 25% off any Seahawks jersey for trading in cut/traded players' jerseys, then they'll donate the old jerseys to poor people that can't afford to buy full priced jerseys of players they'll cut in a few months  (nfl.com)	(60)

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