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Source	Fark Headline		Comments
		Apparently when it comes to naming shoes no one at Target passed Spanish 101 source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share:	(53)
		FC Barcelona midfielder Xavi outdoes Beckham, Messi, and Tebow, completes 96 out of 96 passes source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share:	(8)

		Kansas passes the "Women's Right to Know Act," which, like all Republican bills, is actually the opposite of what its title suggests source: maddowblog.msnbc.com   |   share:	(235)
		Obamacare will work out so well, one of its main architects stated the following: Law 'beyond comprehension;' After bad start, 'will only get worse'...Fail tag is for all those who 'passed it to see what was in it' source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share:	(130)
		What it's like to be LeBron: "OK, I'm on the break, jumped a little early but that's all right, I'll just pass to...Mike Miller? Screw that, I'll just do this myself" source: deadspin.com   |   share:	(59)

		"Ashley is passed out naked on the bathroom floor" is a A) Lyric from a new ZZ Top song. C) An example of a hilarious note left for roommates source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share:	(84)
		Democrat civil war brews in Massachusetts as lawmakers pass $500 million tax increase but risk veto by governor who insists on $1.9 billion tax increase source: masslive.com   |   share:	(39)
		Mexican Barbie comes complete with passport, but not visa stamp for entry into the US source: amazon.com   |   share:	(39)

		What do you get when you mix "bicyclists with a passion for spontaneous acts of silliness" with "very regimented" transit managers? A rare bit of common sense from both source: boston.com   |   share:	(14)
		Replace any word or phrase in a well-known literary passage with the phrase "your mom." Example: "Theirs not to reason why, theirs but to do your mom." Voting enabled source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share:	(377)
		Cab drivers threaten to stop picking up passengers if city continues to force them to charge a flat rate. In other words, business as usual source: postandcourier.com   |   share:	(32)
		Granted that it's harder to pass the sobriety tests with one leg..But this guy has had 7 chances source: scsun-news.com   |   share:	(26)

Having solved all other problems, North Carolina passes a bill requiring schools to teach cursive handwriting. So students will be able to read the Bill of Rights source: wral.com   |   share:

(165)

Passenger takes care of security problem instead of TSA. The current score appears to be: Passengers - 3, TSA - 0 source: mercurynews.com   |   share:

(114)

		The Texas House of Representatives stops trying to defund Planned Parenthood, gut education and mental health budgets, and secede from the United States, just long enough to pass critical legislation: Pecan Pie is the official state pie source: wfaa.com   |   share:	(102)
		Maryland becomes first state in the union to pass gun control law mandating fingerprint checks for buyers, magazine and assault weapon bans, and purchasing restrictions based on mental health source: washingtonpost.com   |   share:	(339)

New bill could allow your employer access to your Facebook password. Now, granted, people already voluntarily abandon their privacy by posting their every move on Facebook, but this is going too far source: seattlepi.com   |   share:

(155)

		Firefox about to surpass Chrome in popularity source: reviews.cnet.com   |   share:	(180)
		Airline introduces a new system for passenger air-fares. Scales source: news.com.au   |   share:	(88)

Photoshop theme: Congress has just a passed a bill protecting genetically modified seeds from litigation for health risks. Photoshop what these lawsuit-free mutant seeds might produce source: rt.com   |   share:

(48)

		Kobe passes Wilt on scoring list, buys wife a new ring source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share:	(17)
		Kentucky passes law that will allow people to break the law in accordance with their religious faith. In related news, Al Qaida was reportedly looking for directions to Fort Campbell, KY on Google Maps source: usatoday.com   |   share:	(223)

Inaugural Fark Fantasy Baseball league needs 2 more members. Password=farkitall source: games.espn.go.com   |   share:

(3)

		Dear Rep. Joe Mitchell, Please don't pass any laws that would restrict gun ownership. Response: Thank you for your concern, citizen. But F*CK your slave-holding, murdering, adulterous, baby-raping, incestuous, snaggle-toothed ass source: blog.al.com   |   share:	(308)
		You can salt your hash and break fast some toasted passwords, kiddies source: arstechnica.com   |   share:	(18)

Not news: Roommate draws a penis on you while you're passed out News: You wake up and beat him and then get arrested for assault Fark: You forget to wash off the penis and it shows up in your mugshot source: arlnow.com   |   share:

(143)

		NOLA judge rules law banning felons from guns unconstitutional after a constiutional amendment was passed last year by voters making gun ownership a "fundamental right" on the same level as freedom of speech/religion - 'Laissez les bon temps roulez' source: nola.com   |   share:	(280)
		Denny Hamlin won't have any excuse blame his performance on how hard it is the pass in the Gen6, or how mean Joey Logano is, as he starts on pole for the Autoclub 400 at Fontana. 2:30 PM ET on Fox source: sbnation.com   |   share:	(844)

		US Senate passes budget resolution, after "herculean" effort. News: For the first time since 2009. Now it turns to the House, where it will take an act of God source: rawstory.com   |   share:	(168)
		A soldier in Afghanistan saves a wounded cat from the battlefield and nurses him back to health.The soldier soon realizes that the bit of compassion and love that cat showed him is what it took to stay strong. Have a dusty Caturday source: kboi2.com   |   share:	(1244)

		Whoopsie: anyone who knows both your e-mail address and your date of birth can hack your iTunes/iCloud account and change your password source: slashgear.com   |   share:	(56)
		Champions of small government pass intentionally unconstitutional bill banning abortion source: thinkprogress.org   |   share:	(292)
		Coca Cola won't have kosher Coke ready for Passover, Jewish exodus to Mexican Coca Cola is expected source: ajc.com   |   share:	(177)

Louisiana State University Board of Supervisors names F.King Alexander as finalist for university president after passing over Hugh Jass and Heywood Jablome source: theadvocate.com   |   share:

(55)

		New UK libel laws passed after the News International phone-hacking scandal mean vast new state power over the media, but as long as that power is in the hands of leftists it won't ever be misused source: guardian.co.uk   |   share:	(60)
		John Delorean passed away eight years ago today. Here's the crash test video for the Delorean DMC-12, model year 1981 or 2015 source: youtube.com   |   share:	(24)

You can all stop passing around the link to those 2005/2013 Pope crowd photos.Turns out the photos were of totally different situations; there was no Pope speaking at all in the earlier photo, just the spaghetti monster source: washingtonpost.com   |   share:

(11)

		Groovy: The family of writer Ken Kesey plans to restore his 'Electric Kool-Aid Acid' bus in time for the 50th anniversary of its passengers' LSD-laced trip across America source: news.yahoo.com   |   share:	(48)
		Rand Paul wants to pass a census religion law that was already passed 36 years ago. RAND PAUL source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share:	(102)

		Drunk driver arrested traveling south on northbound highway lanes. "Told she had been going the wrong way, Baron's passenger chimed in, "I've been telling her that for the last 10 minutes," police said." Did the Boston Fark party start already? source: salemnews.com   |   share:	(26)
		This one time, at band camp, our teacher saved us from wrecking when the bus driver passed out at 70 mph. No word on flautists source: ksdk.com   |   share:	(36)

		New Pope warns church they are in danger of being compassionate source: bbc.co.uk   |   share:	(163)
		Apparently Jason Statham is the only actor who is willing to pass on Star Wars VII: A New Hip source: io9.com   |   share:	(67)
		Musical instruments will now be required to have passports to travel. Drummers and bassists can still be shipped with normal cargo source: foxnews.com   |   share:	(33)
		Senate: Sure, we'll pass a bill to fund the government...just don't mind all of the pro-gun measures we crammed into the bill as well source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share:	(342)

		It looks like Facebook and other tech giants are going to have your personal data because the chances of Congress passing an online privacy law are next to nil source: motherjones.com   |   share:	(63)
		No one could accuse the Brits of a lack of passion for their history. As the feud continues over where to bury Richard III, the head of the York Minster church is getting hate mail source: newser.com   |   share:	(38)
		Mississippi, the fattest state in the union, reacts to NYC mayor Bloomberg's "big soda ban" by passing a law to make it illegal for any city in THEIR state to ever force restaurants to limit portion sizes or post calorie counts source: nydailynews.com   |   share:	(295)
		Jason Zucker : "Say, that was a nice pass if I do say so myself. What else is happening on this side of the ice?" Corey Perry : "BOOM HEADSHOT" source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share:	(71)
		Locusts decend on Israel ahead of Passover. With no new pope, what will the Jews do? (w/photos) source: photoblog.nbcnews.com   |   share:	(31)
		Just like when you have to use your cell phone, it's a good idea to pull over when you have to shoot up heroin. The plan unravels when you pass out in your truck, cross three lanes of traffic, roll down a hill, hit a sign and a wall source: 620wtmj.com   |   share:	(11)

FAA investigating why passenger jet drove off the runway. Subby guesses it had something to do with the guy steering it source: wfaa.com   |   share:

(29)

		NASA admits there's only about a 3 day window to find and track asteroids passing close to Earth, like Asteroid 2013 EN, whizzing past the Moon today. Where's Harry Stamper when we need him most? source: bubblews.com   |   share:	(76)
		House Republicans, eager to prove that they're serious about passing a budget, include as the core component of their new proposal the repeal of Obamacare source: foxnews.com   |   share:	(278)

What do you get when you cross a bridge underpass with a raised dump bed? About halfway source: fox8.com   |   share:

(37)

		Researchers bypass Android phone's encryption system by freezing it. In this context freezing is not a hacking term source: bbc.co.uk   |   share:	(16)
		To honor the passing of Hugo Chavez, Citgo lowers flags to half-mast. The U.S. flag. Some people have a problem with this source: mega949.com   |   share:	(301)

No longer banned by the TSA: Pocket knives and golf clubs. Still banned by the TSA: Respect for passengers, Fourth Amendment source: bloomberg.com   |   share:

(159)

		John Candy passed away on this date in 1994. Sad tag requests a video to cheer it up source: youtube.com   |   share:	(26)
		"Folk neuroscience" is part of how we talk about ourselves now, but much of what passes as knowledge is inaccurate source: guardian.co.uk   |   share:	(20)
		Why is it so hard to pass liberal laws? Don't blame the voters. New study shows that all politicians think their constituents are way more conservative than they actually are, with GOP politicians overstating their voters conservatism by 20 points source: washingtonpost.com   |   share:	(105)
		Boehner: "Obama doesn't have a budget". Press: "It's on his website." Boehner: "Well if it was a real plan why doesn't the Senate pass it?" Press: *crickets*. What Press should have said: "The Senate voted on it last week; the GOP filibustered it" source: nbcnews.com   |   share:	(101)
		Without doubt the bravest man you will ever see on YouTube. Fark: and passionate advocate for the 2nd amendment. Double Fark: apparently there is a full on dust storm in my livingroom source: youtube.com   |   share:	(138)

		The Hobbit passes the $1 billion mark at the box office, though it was a slow, ponderous walk to reach the goal source: insidemovies.ew.com   |   share:	(72)
		Green power is passé. Massachusetts is going brown source: telegram.com   |   share:	(63)
		Egypt struck by a plague of locusts ahead of Passover. This is not a repeat of 1446 BC source: israelnationalnews.com   |   share:	(54)

Elderly library custodian takes in his girlfriend's 5 cats when she passes away. So what happened to them when he died? The librarians promptly adopt all 5 felines - proving that what goes around, comes around on Caturday source: capitalgazette.com   |   share:

(1124)

		After 15 years of terrifying intercity bus passengers, Fung Wah is dead. "We will not hesitate to immediately shut down a bus or truck company that ignores safety regulations and puts innocent lives at risk" source: bostonherald.com   |   share:	(33)
		"We bemoan the loss of compassion in society, but we revere this severe level of aggression in these programs, and I think it is a real problem," said Captain Obvious source: cnn.com   |   share:	(78)
		If passing out at a Super Bowl party and getting sexually molested by two females is wrong, I don't want to be right source: syracuse.com   |   share:	(141)

House finally passes Violence Against Women Act, despite 62% opposition from the GOP source: tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share:

(166)

Motorola, er, Freescale, cooks up an ARM system-on-a-chip small enough to be swallowed. Heck, subby's passed a kidney stone bigger than this thing source: wired.com   |   share:

(18)

		Developmentally disabled high school basketball player gets put into final game by coach but misses several shots, leaving opposing team with in-bound pass as clock runs down. Hard to see what happens next due to large volume of dust in gym source: community.statesmanjournal.com   |   share:	(50)
		The point at which you realize you should have passed on the new cushy TV job offer is oh so fleeting source: nydailynews.com   |   share:	(29)

Bus driver costs taxpayers $100,000 because he was eating a Jamaican beef patty while driving and managed to slam on the brakes and send passengers spilling onto the floor source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share:

(54)

		If you are going to pass a snowplow, don't pull in front of the snowplow right away, as you might spin out of control and embarrass yourself as well as your family name source: ksl.com   |   share:	(63)
		I can tell you right now you need some straight talk: that impeachment will not pass the Congress of the United States source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share:	(123)
		1964 Popemobile now on display in Tacoma. Holds 12 passengers, has bullet proof windshield, viewing balcony, hidden seats for the kids source: seattletimes.com   |   share:	(36)
		We'd like to welcome our passengers aboard Balls of Steel Airlines. We'll be taking off from an altitude of 10,000 feet today source: youtube.com   |   share:	(109)
		Gas prices forecast to go past four dollars a gallon on news that Windows 8 has picture passwords source: baynews9.com   |   share:	(110)

The 10th Circuit Court of Appeals: the 2nd Amendment right to bear arms does not mean you have the right to carry a concealed weapon in public. Rational, erudite, dispassionate, level-headed, civil and cogent discussion to the right source: denverpost.com   |   share:

(177)

Great moment in American history: Lincoln tells Americans civil war is over, way forward is by reconciliation. Not so great moment in American history: McCain tells Aurora victim's mother she can forget about assault weapons ban to pass. Crowd cheers source: livewire.talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share:

(586)

		In a move surely nobody will have a problem with, Royal Caribbean to begin charging passengers $12 per day for gratuities source: freep.com   |   share:	(58)
		Time to get drunk and shoot guns: South Carolina passes "Guns in Bars" bill source: opposingviews.com   |   share:	(362)

		Marco Rubio's frothing response to the Obama Administration's proposed Immigration Reform Bill could actually wind up getting the bill passed source: tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share:	(94)
		To prove they feel your pain during these difficult economic times the NH House is voting on free ski passes for lawmakers source: wmur.com   |   share:	(15)
		TSA still lying to passengers, still making little girls cry on their way to Disney World source: photographyisnotacrime.com   |   share:	(86)

		Dear Traffic Guy: I passed a guy who was toking while driving. "He was steering with his elbows while using a lighter to light the pipe bowl. I know times have changed with our new marijuana law, but could this possibly be legal?" source: thenewstribune.com   |   share:	(125)
		New Pew Research report shows that Pinterest is close to becoming the second largest social networking site, just a few bored scrapbookers away from passing the narcissists on Twitter source: slashgear.com   |   share:	(40)
		Chimpanzees found to have memories which are far better than humans. Scientists surmise that it's probably because they don't have a dozen assorted PINs and passwords to remember source: nbcnews.com   |   share:	(25)
		Apparently 'Star Wars' contains a double entendre or two; you may wish to express your true feelings about that alone in a back passage somewhere source: youtube.com   |   share:	(8)

The shadow of death has passed over Shadow Morton, farewell Rock and or Roll Guy source: spinner.com   |   share:

(11)

Crippled cruise ship Triumph finally docks in Mobile, Alabama. Upon realizing they were in Alabama, passengers demand to be put back out to sea source: latimes.com   |   share:

(115)

		It seems ordinary travelers have a problem when celebs bypass JFK security screening source: gothamist.com   |   share:	(117)
		Pygmy pachyderms passing, possibly pesticide poisoning. Pending proof, palm product plantation probable source: csmonitor.com   |   share:	(14)

Here's how Marco Rubio wrote his SOTU response: condense a Milton Friedman book into a Reader's Digest article, replace with 5th grade level words, focus test passages with conservative octogenarians, and stir with unsourced Ronald Reagan quotes source: theatlantic.com   |   share:

(122)

(Online Shopping Report)		"Password1" remains the most-common password used by middle-aged CEOs, while racist emails that will get their sons fired topped emails sent source: shopathome.com   |   share:	(57)
		Senate passes Violence Against Women act by landslide. Meanwhile, there are 22 Senators apparently still in favor of violence against women source: usatoday.com   |   share:	(320)
		If you're driving around with a suspended license and the cops pull you over, you're not going to trick them into thinking you weren't driving by exiting out the passenger's door source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share:	(6)
		Smoking is bad for your health. Especially if you light up in your car while another passenger is using medical oxygen source: indystar.com   |   share:	(15)

		The first woman to crack the "boys club" of baseball scouts passes away at 100 source: hardballtalk.nbcsports.com   |   share:	(5)
		Day 2: The situation has grown dire. Passengers have eaten the carved watermelon that once adorned the now-empty buffet table. Without leisure activities, factions have formed. The Indonesian room stewards have folded towels into improvised weapons source: usatoday.com   |   share:	(220)
		Virginia House passes a "Tebow Bill" which will allow talented homeschool students to warm the benches for mediocre public school athletes source: ashburn.patch.com   |   share:	(130)
		And now for his second act, Obama will just bypass that pesky little congress ...thing source: washingtonpost.com   |   share:	(320)
		Not news: Unknown, mostly challengers player wins an ATP250 event in Chile. Still not news: Wins his first career ATP title. Go straight to fark, do not pass news: Against Rafael Nadal. Ultrafark: On clay source: espn.go.com   |   share:	(18)

Apparently displeased at how a fan 7-8 rows deep passed the ball to him, LeBron James conducts quick clinic on how to make a two-handed chest pass source: thebiglead.com   |   share:

(26)

		Criminal mastermind tries to score big by passing off rolled-up pennies as dimes at the same bank twice, is eventually caught on his getaway bike. Guess we won't be seeing him in Ocean's 14 source: sanluisobispo.com   |   share:	(31)
		Cute mom passes out drunk at friend's house, leaves infant and toddler home alone, then makes brilliant observation about her life source: wpbf.com   |   share:	(188)
		Sockeye salmon have an internal compass that helps lead them home to spawn. A compass that's delicious when grilled with a light white wine sauce and a dash of fresh herbs source: green.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share:	(7)

		Not news: Woman passes drugs to inmate during prison visit. News: Drugs passed during open mouth kiss. Fark: Visitor is inmate's mom source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share:	(30)
		"Gas passing spurs fight, felony charge" source: austindailyherald.com   |   share:	(17)
		Stuart Freeborn passes away at 98. Who? Well, he was just a make-up artist who contributed to such small films as "2001: A Space Odyssey" and "Star Wars". oh and Yoda's look was based on features of himself and Albert Einstein source: bbc.co.uk   |   share:	(11)

		Toots de la Footsjelly, a TF Photoshopper since 2009, recently passed away. He will be missed source: fark.com   |   share:	(215)
		British Airways captain gropes passenger, tries to get into cockpit while shouting "I want to rape the flight deck", and then passes out drunk. Apparently picked wrong week to not quit drinking source: travel.msn.co.nz   |   share:	(31)

The smartest member of the Bush Administration passes away. He was a good boy source: washingtonpost.com   |   share:

(100)

Alaska Airlines plane lands safely after pilot passes out. Thankfully, the co-pilot had the lasanga source: cbsnews.com   |   share:

(57)

President Obama's claim of skeet shooting "all the time" does not pass The Pinocchio Test source: washingtonpost.com   |   share:

(277)

		Wanna know how farked up US Copyright law is? With regard to "Baby Got Back", one could make a passable case that Jonathan Coulton is more likely guilty of copyright infringement than Fox and Glee are source: techdirt.com   |   share:	(51)
		Arkansas Senate passes bill allowing concealed guns in church, where it will now be every amen for himself source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share:	(131)
		Before he passed to the ethereal heavens on his white steed of freedom and justice, Andrew Breitbart warned us about shows like HBO's "Girls" and its darklord hellbeast Lena Dunham, and how we must be ever vigilant against their demonic possession source: breitbart.com   |   share:	(134)
		If your bank gives you $1400 in counterfeit bills, don't bother complaining because they'll just refuse to pass the buck source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share:	(123)

		Just your average 19 pass soccer scoring play, including every member of the team plus the goalie source: youtube.com   |   share:	(33)
		Passerby hears gunshots and someone screaming for help from inside house. Calls cops, who show up and storm the place, only to find a group of teenagers playing Call of Duty source: upi.com   |   share:	(63)

		Heavy Rain composer Normand Corbeil passes away, aged 56. Play a sad song for him source: joystiq.com   |   share:	(35)
		Once again, basketball fans, you can't pass the ball to your coach. He's not only out of bounds, he's not a player. Also, if he instinctively passes the ball to the open man and he scores, it won't count source: thebiglead.com   |   share:	(11)
		The Fight Against Obamacare has just begun. Which can only mean that it getting passed, signed, and declared constitutional was just the Republicans tripping and TKO's themselves climbing into the ring source: weeklystandard.com   |   share:	(141)
		105 year old California woman celebrates passing her driving test, tells friends she needs to be able to drive her kids to the Social Security office source: kcoy.com   |   share:	(20)

		Hot blonde teacher ordered to turn in her passport so she can't flee to Mexico with her 15 year old lover source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share:	(73)
		Andre the Giant has a posse, and they'd be happy to tell you all about their hero, who passed away 20 years ago today source: wrestlecrap.com   |   share:	(29)

CNN columnist writes long, passionate article about why we shouldn't clone a Neanderthal baby, even though nobody's planning to do so. Next on CNN: Why we shouldn't try to evolve humans out of E.coli source: cnn.com   |   share:

(70)

		Subby loathes weather.com with a passion for being wildly inaccurate infotainment. What do the Farkers out there use as alternatives? source: fark.com   |   share:	(73)
		If this bill passes in Oregon giving a friend a cigarette will be punishable by one year in prison, a $6,250 fine or both source: kptv.com   |   share:	(174)

		"A free man in a free country who owns deeded property should be able to say what he does on his property," intones Montana state legislator on citizens' right to shoot to kill any bison trespassing in their back yards source: helenair.com   |   share:	(128)
		GOP: it has been 7,339 years since the Senate last passed a budget source: thehill.com   |   share:	(42)
		If the White House gets the debt ceiling bill that says the Senate must pass a budget or they can't get paid, Obama will look at it before going "I'm okay with this" source: politico.com   |   share:	(41)
		US: Let's make planes invisible to radar to sneak up on our enemies. China: Well we have a cheaper alternative, we make radar think it's a passenger liner which no one suspects before it launches the missile source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share:	(97)

		Governor McDonnell (R-VA) is horrified that the Republicans in the Virginia state senate used one Democrat's visit to the inauguration to push through a gerrymandering bill, but might just pass it anyway source: thinkprogress.org   |   share:	(146)
		Nothing to see, just a Stephen Curry half-court bounce pass splitting two defenders (w/video) source: deadspin.com   |   share:	(36)

		The Earl of Baltimore passes away. I hope God will let him kick some baseball dirt, and not eject him out of Heaven source: masnsports.com   |   share:	(61)
		Tennis great Gussie Moran, a Farkette in every sense of the word, passes on at 89 source: nytimes.com   |   share:	(14)

		In honor of both the upcoming MLK Day and the one year anniversary of the defeat of SOPA, here's King's "I Have A Dream" speech. Fark: Which you wouldn't have been able to see if SOPA had passed source: vimeo.com   |   share:	(71)
		United Airlines becomes the first U.S. carrier to offer Wi-Fi on long flights, finally giving passengers something to do for the four hours they sit on the tarmac source: gizmodo.com   |   share:	(30)

		Survivor of Halifax Explosion passes away at 101. Will be buried with giant green diamond on his head source: thechronicleherald.ca   |   share:	(32)
		Passengers aboard plane to New York excited to see Tony Danza, star of Who's the Bleeeeaaaaaaghhh source: nypost.com   |   share:	(31)

		NY State becomes the first to pass new gun-control laws since the Newtown massacre, which among other things limits magazines to 7 rounds, down from a previous limit of 10. Gee, I feel safer already source: usnews.com   |   share:	(368)
		Remember the boarding advantage of being a United Airlines passenger with elite status? Well, hold on to those memories source: nbcnews.com   |   share:	(89)

		Airport workers become suspicious when passenger doesn't have enough luggage for his scheduled 9 minute vacation on Cape Cod source: capecodonline.com   |   share:	(71)
		Man sues oven-drip tray manufacturer because he thinks Teflon fumes made his pet parrot pass on, be no more, go to meet its Maker, cease to be, become an ex-parrot source: thelocal.de   |   share:	(54)

		Seven men gang rape bus passenger in India, sadly this is not a repeat from last month source: cnn.com   |   share:	(285)
		Since winning Super Bowl XXXIX, the Patriots have compiled a 7-6 playoff record. Since Week 14, Matt Schaub has thrown just one touchdown pass. But none of that matters, since this is NFL Playoff Football - Pats vs Texans, 4:30 ET, CBS source: nfl.com   |   share:	(1561)

		The guy who jumped into the Bronx Zoo's tiger pit and got mauled pleads not guilty to trespassing charges, planning a "dumbass" defense source: detroitnews.com   |   share:	(60)
		What passes for "editorial independence" these days: Cnet forced by its parent company, CBS, to rescind a "best of" tech award to Dish Network's "The Hopper" DVR, because CBS is suing Dish Network over the device's ability to skip commercials source: theatlanticwire.com   |   share:	(73)
		1 yr later: Costa Concordia still sunk, Captain still drunk, passengers still in a funk. Oh yeah, and a survivor is shilling book to capitalize on the event source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share:	(25)

If you're being arrested for trying to pass counterfeit money at IHOP and McDonald's, eating the fake bills might be the healthiest decision you've made all day source: ramblingbeachcat.com   |   share:

(10)

The law that requires Congress to pass an annual budget has no enforcement mechanism, which is why Harry Reid isn't in the stocks in the public square being pelted with vegetables source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share:

(42)

(Some Guy)		You just stepped out into traffic and got hit by a 20-ton Metro bus in Downtown Seattle. Do you: A) Call for help. B) Pass out from neurogenic shock. C) Get up, tip your cap and continue your morning stroll to Starbucks source: injurytriallawyer.com   |   share:	(61)
		Think Emma Watson looks like a 12-year-old boy? Passport Control at JFK agrees with you source: upi.com   |   share:	(206)
		RAND PAUL is seeking an amendment to require two thirds majority in the Senate before any anti-gun law can be passed. RAND PAUL source: examiner.com   |   share:	(223)

		If you've been lying awake at night wondering if Earth is passing through walls of dark matter or dark energy into different domains of space, don't worry - scientists are every bit as wacko as you are source: newscenter.lbl.gov   |   share:	(78)
		"Well of course I'm allowed in the carpool lane, officer. There are two people in this vehicle according to the Supreme Court: me and that certificate of incorporation strapped in the passenger seat right there" source: thedailydolt.com   |   share:	(135)

Gerard Depardieu accepts new passport, making it officially OK for Russians to adopt French babies source: reuters.com   |   share:

(83)

Josh Brolin arrested after cops find him passed out on sidewalk. Goonies Never Say Die source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share:

(52)

		The guys who put forth a real filibuster reform package worry about that "bipartisan" package that McCain and the Grumpy Old Men contingent put forth, because it just...might...pass source: tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share:	(61)
		Not news: Homeless man found dead under overpass. Not news: Heir to part of $300 million fortune dies. Fark: Same person source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share:	(48)

		Alfie Fripp 98, thought to be the longest-serving British prisoner of war, passes away. Damn, you would have thought he'd be freed by now source: bbc.co.uk   |   share:	(38)
		Good news: A filibuster reform package is likely to pass in the United States Senate. Bad news: It strengthens the ability of the minority party to obstruct legislation source: tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share:	(86)
		The original assault weapon ban would have never passed if it wasn't for a former union president from the "left coast" source: buzzfeed.com   |   share:	(219)
		Michigan and Virginia pass backdoor abortion restrictions. Heck, I didn't think you could even get pregnant that way source: salon.com   |   share:	(163)

Rockets' Carlos Delfino makes between-the-legs pass. Fark: Hawk's Al Horford's legs source: youtube.com   |   share:

(20)

		Passengers on the Queen Mary II sickened by virus outbreak on their $5,000 cruise. If that's what they were looking for they could have gotten the same thing for half the price over on Carnival source: reuters.com   |   share:	(23)
		Deadman Pass lives up to name source: usnews.nbcnews.com   |   share:	(51)

		Woman dies of flu-like symptoms whilst travelling via crowded passenger train. It begins source: cbc.ca   |   share:	(91)
		Bishop who built 400 secret churches in communist Poland passes away. St. Peter widens Pearly Gates to accommodate passage of extra-giant brass balls source: buenosairesherald.com   |   share:	(106)
		The Hobbit passes the $600 million mark, reigning supreme at the box office. Django Unchained takes second with $31 million, and the movie about the bread crumbles to third source: deadline.com   |   share:	(85)

		Chilean astronomer captures video of Jupiter passing behind, and then rising above, the Moon source: slate.com   |   share:	(39)
		Apparently, having your quarterback complete only 38.4% of his passes and your running attack to gain only three yards the entire game doesn't stop you from winning a Bowl game source: sportige.com   |   share:	(20)

		You take one down, pass it around, 99 bottles of fan semen on the wall source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share:	(107)
		Remember, if the county bus you're driving has video surveillance, the cameras and microphones will still record you tuning up a passenger after you shut off the lights and lock the door. (Video contains profanity) source: jsonline.com   |   share:	(43)
		JJ Abrams passes on Star Wars, says he will only ruin one science fiction franchise at a time source: insidemovies.ew.com   |   share:	(162)
		Egypt's new constitution passes with 63.8% of the vote. Americans were shocked and left wondering how a country can get that many people to agree on anything? source: france24.com   |   share:	(29)

		Who knew that having a 1,000-yard rusher, a 1,000-yard receiver, a 3,000-yard passer, someone with at least 15 sacks, and two players with 100 tackles apiece doesn't mean anything in the NFL? source: sportige.com   |   share:	(118)
		Egypt's Senate convenes after the constitution passes. Imagine if they were American, they'd get all pissed over Morsi then go on a month long vacation and do nothing but blame the Muslim Brotherhood for all their ills and....wait...ah crap source: blogs.voanews.com   |   share:	(13)

Keiji Nakazawa, author of the anti-war/anti-nuke book Barefoot Gen, passes away at 73 years old source: japantimes.co.jp   |   share:

(54)

Week 16 starts strong as Atlanta scores home field throughout the playoffs, Megatron broke Jerry Rice's single season receiving yards record, and Matt Stafford sets the NFL record for most passing yards without a TD source: scores.espn.go.com   |   share:

(47)

		Gangnam Style has passed 1 billion views on Youtube. Where the hell is my Mayan Apocalypse? source: digitallife.today.com   |   share:	(66)
		Farker UseUrHeadFred just passed the first anniversary of opening his craft beer store. For the first time ever, he's getting a $1000 bonus that's strictly for fun. What should he spend it on? source: fark.com   |   share:	(25)

		Carnival Cruise line hits iceberg, throws passengers overboard and is leaking oil for fiscal 4Q source: dailyrecord.com   |   share:	(14)
		Belle splits with Tebow, disappointed over lack of passes source: 13wham.com   |   share:	(34)
		Getting busted for weed is like dying on the Middle Passage, or Kristallnacht, or the Killing Fields, it's. . . It's like the nuking of Caprica by the Cylons man source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share:	(51)

Boehner is gathering support for Plan B, Obama vows to abort it if passed source: latimes.com   |   share:

(45)

A modern form of slavery has been embedded within the welfare state. And no matter how you slice it, property theft to promote a false ideology of "fairness" or advance a twisted form of "compassion" to gain power is abhorrent source: americanthinker.com   |   share:

(131)

		Boeing delivers the first new jet to Iraq in 30 years. Passengers are immediately ecstatic about the new overhead compartments that can hold up to three chickens and a goat source: newsok.com   |   share:	(17)
		Just backup QB leading the team to victory, and into first place in the division, while also setting a season high in passing yards and a top notch QB rating, no big deal source: washingtonpost.com   |   share:	(134)

		Don't pass out, but Obama is to name Sen. John Kerry as Secretary of State source: nydailynews.com   |   share:	(189)
		If a cop tells you not to trespass at the local Circle K, those orders do not expire after 45 minutes source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share:	(27)

(Some Guy)		Do you use picture passwords in WIndows 8? Hope you cleaned your screen source: uncoveror.com   |   share:	(87)
		Headline of the day "Southwest Airlines owes passengers 5.8 million free beers" source: philly.com   |   share:	(45)
		Cathay Pacific flight attendants threaten to not smile at passengers due to a pay dispute. Passengers on US based airlines ask "Flight attendants smile?" source: cnbc.com   |   share:	(27)

		American Airlines, tired of simply screwing passengers with fees, now bundles them for a complete one-flight stand experience source: theprovince.com   |   share:	(46)
		Matt Lauer has a sensitive, compassionate interview with Anne Hathaway after her embarrassing wardrobe malfunction: "I've seen a lot of you lately" source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share:	(142)
		Amazon's business strategy involves passing up short-term windfalls in order to secure solid long-term gains, which is why it will one day destroy us all source: slate.com   |   share:	(114)

		You best be using at least 9 character passwords with lower and upper case letters and numbers and special characters and umlauts and gerunds and dingos source: phys.org   |   share:	(64)
		Protip: If you were the driver in an accident, the car is on fire, and your friend is in the passenger seat "he doesn't want to get out" is not a valid reason to leave him to die source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share:	(88)
		Paul Ryan: The GOP needs to be more articulate about its compassion, as opposed to actually being compassionate source: dailycaller.com   |   share:	(90)

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