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Headlines matching 'heart attacks'
Sun March 14, 2010
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Dlisted) Dumbass Fatty Fatty Fatty McFatterson, woman who weighs over 600 lbs is trying to GAIN 400 lbs in the next two years to become fattest woman on the planet, or perhaps a planet herself  (dlisted.com) (372)

Tue March 02, 2010
(Think Progress) Stupid Limbaugh compares Pelosi to a terrorist for saying passing health care is more important than re-election  (thinkprogress.org) (73)
(Yahoo) Sad Having already successfully assumed the roles of Ziggy Stardust, The Thin White Duke, The Blue-eyed Soulman, and of course, the Goblin King, David Bowie seems to be trying out a new persona: Howard Hughes  (news.yahoo.com) (79)
(Guardian.com) Sad Rapper Guru makes the news by falling into a coma, prompting white hipsters everywhere to pretend they knew who he was all along  (guardian.co.uk) (50)

Fri February 19, 2010
(CBS Sacramento) Scary You: "I think I'm having a heart attack. Please send an ambulance." 911 operator: "Will that be cash or credit?"  (cbs13.com) (172)

Tue February 16, 2010
(MSNBC) Obvious Lamont announces run for governor. Fred fakes heart attack. Grady says "Great googly moogly."  (msnbc.msn.com) (21)

Sun February 07, 2010
(AJC) PSA Super Bowl stress can trigger heart attacks, so be careful ouWHAT THE FARK KINDA CALL WAS THAT, YOU STUPID SON OF A BIaaaerrrrrrrrk... *thud*  (ajc.com) (39)

Thu February 04, 2010
(Wired) Ironic Spending time at high altitude causes healthy weight loss--unless you're fat  (wired.com) (29)

Sun January 17, 2010
(Seattle Times) Amusing Assault and robbery is no laughing matter. Except when the suspect is 52 and he grabs the 26-year-old victim's groin while taking his wallet. And then the victim fights back and the suspect passes out from a heart attack  (seattletimes.nwsource.com) (35)
(St. Petersburg Times) Sad Former Tampa Bay Buc Gaines Adams, traded to Chicago Bears last October, dies of heart attack at 26. Should have gotten that warranty instead of just "as-is."  (blogs.tampabay.com) (73)

Tue January 12, 2010
(Live Science) Interesting Fat butts may be healthy, says study you other brothers can't deny  T-Shirt  (livescience.com) (249)

Mon January 11, 2010
(London Times) Stupid Study claims watching TV increases your risk of heart disease by 18 percent. If you're watching a reality TV show about global warming in Yemen while eating potato chips, you've already been dead for three years  (timesonline.co.uk) (37)

Fri January 08, 2010
(Telegraph) Interesting Having sex twice a week reduces chance of heart attack by half - unless her husband walks in on you  (telegraph.co.uk) (124)

Mon December 28, 2009
(CNN) Obvious Obamacare won't make a difference because Americans are too drunk, lazy, fat and stupid to stay out of the hospital to begin with  (cnn.com) (226)

Sun December 27, 2009
(Science Daily) Unlikely Swedish researchers conclude there is probably no Santa. Here comes the science  (sciencedaily.com) (42)

Fri December 25, 2009
(Daily Mail) Weird Inventor spends Christmas with the perfect woman - his custom-made fembot: "Aiko is always helpful and never complains. She is the perfect woman to have around at Christmas" (w/ pics that will creep you the hell out)  (dailymail.co.uk) (253)

Tue December 22, 2009
(Pajamas Media) Interesting Libertarians need to rethink support for drug legalization because some guy choked on a plastic bag or something about strippers  (pajamasmedia.com) (336)

Mon December 21, 2009
(USA Today) Obvious Winter is hazardous to your health  (usatoday.com) (35)

Sun December 20, 2009
(TMZ) Sad Brittany Murphy, star of "Clueless" and "8 Mile," died last night after full cardiac arrest at 32  (tmz.com) (¾)

Fri December 18, 2009
(CNN) Cool Stem cell therapy repairs damaged heart tissue after heart attack. Stem cell opponents presumably to opt out  (cnn.com) (72)

Sat December 12, 2009
(Spiegel) Hero An 85-year old Israeli man recently went to a doctor for the first time in 65 years after having a heart attack. Which is understandable, when the last doctor you saw before that was Dr. Josef Mengele  (spiegel.de) (188)

Tue December 08, 2009
(WebMD) Obvious CDC says swine flu was less severe than everyone feared as evidenced by the fact that you're alive to read this headline right now  (webmd.com) (100)

Sat December 05, 2009
(Google) Asinine Man has heart attack in hospital parking lot. Hospital refuses to help unless his son calls 911 and pays for the ambulance trip  (google.com) (91)

Fri December 04, 2009
(TMZ) Sad Umaga has a match with the Undertaker. Not that undertaker. The real one  (tmz.com) (148)
(Yahoo) Obvious Australian diver wears a suit to protect him from dangerous jellyfish stings that covered his entire body except his face. You'll never guess where a tiny jellyfish the size of a peanut delivered its near-fatal sting  (news.yahoo.com) (114)

Sun November 29, 2009
(Some Guy) Asinine The city of Las Vegas has 50,000 doses of H1N1 vaccine going to waste because they refuse to open up vaccinations to non-priority groups after priority groups have all been vaccinated  (lvrj.com) (133)

Wed November 25, 2009
(Yahoo) Asinine Studies show that men who stifle their anger at work are more than twice as likely to die of a heart attack; those that don't are more than twice as likely to die of malnutrition and exposure from living in a cardboard box  T-Shirt  (news.yahoo.com) (297)

Mon November 23, 2009
(PhysOrg.com) Scary Women with a spare tire are more likely to go all whargarbl as they age. As if heart disease, diabetes, and Farkers saying "She sounds fat" weren't bad enough  (physorg.com) (116)

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