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Headlines matching 'god'
Sat March 20, 2010
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Chicago Tribune) Cool "What are those?" "Oh, I call them H.P. Lovecraft's Elder Gods. You know...for kids"  (chicagotribune.com) (22)
(Canoe) Cool Finally, Canadians will be able to enjoy Mountain Dew the way God intended it: Loaded with cafeine  (cnews.canoe.ca) (101)
(Examiner) Stupid Rosie O'Donnell is headed back to daytime TV. Where is your God now?  (examiner.com) (23)
(Some Guy) PSA Wondering if you'll survive the upcoming zombie apocalypse? Here's a handy-dandy flowchart for you to determine the strengths and weaknesses of your survival plan. You do have a survival plan? Oh God, please tell me you have a plan?  (gameinformer.com) (203)
(LA Times) Scary "Bees bees bees in the car! Bees everywhere! God, they're huge! They're ripping my flesh off! Run away, your firearms are useless against them!"  (latimes.com) (119)
(Yahoo) Obvious Where do God-fearing Real Americans most like to live? They would be in Mississippi, which leads the nation in religious belief. Where are the godless heathens hiding from the Lord? Head on up New Hampshire and Vermont (damn hippie commies)  (news.yahoo.com) (183)

Fri March 19, 2010
(YouTube) Strange Oh look, a street performer is dancing to Michael Jackson. I wonder if he's any... HOLY MOTHER OF GOD  (youtube.com) (63)
(Yahoo) Cool Abe Vigoda, you are no longer the only immortal amorphous mound of squish  (green.yahoo.com) (31)

Thu March 18, 2010
(Starpulse) Obvious Boy George on the time he met Lady Gaga: "I was like, 'Oh my God' You know, I've been that woman'"  (starpulse.com) (15)
(Google) Dumbass "God rest her soul, " said Mr. Biden about Irish leader's mother...who is still alive  (google.com) (110)

Tue March 16, 2010
(Dallas News) Strange "...dinosaurs were born of Satanic angel who has sex with woman and the animal kingdom that created ungodly reptilian creatures," said the former jail guard wondering why he no longer has a job  (dallasnews.com) (212)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida If you don't have a driver's license and have been arrested for it 14 times already -- for the love of God, put on your seat belt  (tampabay.com) (35)
(Missoulian) Unlikely If you still can't get credit to buy a home, there's good news: God's issuing mortgages in Montana  (missoulian.com) (34)

Mon March 15, 2010
(AOL News) Amusing "Hear that, math nerds? Pi is stupid, and God himself said so"  (aolnews.com) (6)
(Daily Mail) Interesting Woman grows breast implants from the fat on her stomach. With 'like the hand of God' pic  (dailymail.co.uk) (393)

Sat March 13, 2010
(Daily Mail) Scary "Soviet power was the opposite of faith in God. It was faith in the greatness of humanity and in the perfectibility of human society. The atheists cannot honestly disown it."  (dailymail.co.uk) (437)
(Fox News) Florida Wife of Pentecostal minister locks self in room for weeks to fast and be with God. Husband never bothers to check, since she was in the Lord's hands. Guess how that worked out?  (foxnews.com) (213)
(The New York Times) Obvious Contrary to what many people may believe, the Tea Party's motto is "fiscal responsibility, limited government, and free markets" with little or no mention of God, life and family. You betcha'  (nytimes.com) (304)
(io9) Interesting Scientists may have found where all the antimatter went after the Big Bang. Or, for our religious friends, scientists may have found all the cosmic trash God didn't need after the seventh day  (io9.com) (63)
(Some Idoliot) Followup And the saga of the Pants on the Ground guy continues as his record label is su...I'm sorry, he has a record label? Goddammit, America, no wonder the terrorists hate us  (digitalspy.com) (15)
(LA Times) Sad This just in: Cory Haim's personal effects are already for sale on ebay. God knows what they have planned for his remains  (latimesblogs.latimes.com) (31)

Fri March 12, 2010
(UPI) Amusing Man falls asleep while cooking bacon, finds image of Jesus burned into the pan when he wakes up. Your God wants pork  (upi.com) (81)

Thu March 11, 2010
(Washington Post) Spiffy 9th Circuit Court rules "under God" in Pledge of Allegiance is constitutional. Suck it, you Godless heathen atheists  (washingtonpost.com) (219)
(Contact Music) Fail Mary J. Blige is covering two Led Zeppelin tracks on her next album. Tag is for the whole goddamned enterprise  (contactmusic.com) (53)
(Contact Music) Strange James Brown's bastard child is desperately searching for the Godfather of Soul's earthly remains, hot tub  (contactmusic.com) (14)
(BBC) Video Mexico honors the patron saint of pyrotechnics, San Juan de HOLY MOTHER OF GOD  (news.bbc.co.uk) (48)

Wed March 10, 2010
(Contact Music) Strange Bogota, Colombia is facing the greatest threat it's country has ever known: Metallica. No, seriously, the cops are out in force for this; they'll overlook cocaine, but God forbid you scalp tickets to see a faded metal band  (contactmusic.com) (15)

Tue March 09, 2010
(CNN) Scary Ho-hum, some more stormchaser tornado video of HOLY JESUS MOTHER OF GOD  (cnn.com) (38)

Mon March 08, 2010
(Talking Points Memo) Weird Sarah Palin's palm-scribbles are justified because God did it too, according to an article not published by The Onion  (tpmlivewire.talkingpointsmemo.com) (124)
(Yahoo) News God rolls die, shakes Turkey this time; at least 41 dead  (news.yahoo.com) (200)

Sun March 07, 2010
(Contact Music) Strange Oh dear God no: Sharon Osbourne wants to run for a political office. Crisis averted: In Britain, where her shenanigans won't affect us. Dodged a bullet there, didn't we?  (contactmusic.com) (30)
(NYPost) Dumbass "Coke-tail" waitress. Get it, coketail waitress? Anyway, she sues her boss for snorting cocaine off her shoulder. With a thank you God yessireebob I'd hit it pic  (nypost.com) (145)

Sat March 06, 2010
(Jalopnik) Amusing Dear God, the Cylons ARE coming  (jalopnik.com) (88)
(The Sun) Interesting 27 year old female ballet teacher has appeared in court accused of abducting one of her boy pupils and having sex with him. With 'I'd hit that like the fist of an angry god' pic  (thesun.co.uk) (127)

Fri March 05, 2010
(Fox News) Ironic Climate scientists go on the offensive: 'God, can't we have a civil dialogue here and discuss the truth without spinning everything.' said reasearcher at Pot Meet Kettle AGW Institute  (foxnews.com) (298)

Thu March 04, 2010
(Some Mumbling Wolfman) Silly Starting very soon, when you think of ice cream, you'll think of Benecio del Toro. I hope to god he extols the virtues of butter pecan in a commercial. Come on, just imagine it  (digitalspy.com) (14)

Wed March 03, 2010
(Texas Tribune) Hero Don McLeroy, prominent creationist, voted off Texas' Board of Education by godless Texas commies  (texastribune.org) (106)
(Contact Music) Obvious American Idol hopeful finds herself in the hospital, most likely from the shame of being on American Idol  (contactmusic.com) (54)

Tue March 02, 2010
(Sign On San Diego) Hero Teacher wins right to display God banners in his math class  (signonsandiego.com) (404)
(Breitbart.com) Asinine Not content with treating the US Constitution as a "living document," the religious left and their secular muscle now want to confer the same status on The Bible - another work written by God  (bighollywood.breitbart.com) (229)

Mon March 01, 2010
(Salon) Dumbass Pat Robertson offers compassionate words of encouragement to the people of Chile over their natural tragedy. Just kidding. He says they had it coming for making god angry. Bonus:"...personal hero of mine, Augusto Pinochet"  (open.salon.com) (194)
(Mlive.com) Amusing Actual headline: Man arrested after shooting up hotel room in Albion, putting alarm clock in microwave and leaving note saying 'God delivered me from evil and placed me in Albion'  (mlive.com) (68)

Sat February 27, 2010
(LiveLeak) Video Tree branch somehow lands on power lines, screams in agony before bursting into flame. God bless the Internet  (liveleak.com) (50)

Thu February 25, 2010
(NYPost) Followup Saga of the Nut vendor continues: Vendors protest in Manhattan, shouting 'let our people go' and 'God Almighty'....'We need to pee like everyone else.' (w/pic of "We need to pee just like everyone else.")  (nypost.com) (59)

Wed February 24, 2010
(Washington Post) Followup VA Republican who said that disabled children are a punishment from God for prior abortions is upset that people have misconstrued his statements to mean he believes that disabled children are a punishment from God for prior abortions  (washingtonpost.com) (66)
(News.com.au) Dumbass Carrie Prejean was a poser: Miss Beverly Hills says that gays should be executed  (news.com.au) (486)
(Huffington Post) Fail Oh my God, they killed Ahmed! You bastards!  (huffingtonpost.com) (84)
(IMDB) Hero Like a phoenix rising from the ashes, Abe Vigoda celebrates his 89th birthday  (imdb.com) (131)

Tue February 23, 2010
(National Review) Asinine After Glenn Beck's stern denunciation of him at CPAC, there is now a movement among the right wing blogodome to brand Roosevelt as a socialist. TEDDY Roosevelt  (corner.nationalreview.com) (174)
(politics.co.uk) Obvious Politicians: "God and religion are stupid." Voters: "fine, good luck finding a new job." Politicians: "Did we say 'stupid?' We meant 'awesome'"  (politics.co.uk) (109)
(Contact Music) Followup Bow Wow pays The Game $100,000 because of a debt incurred in... You know what? You people need to get some real goddamned names  (contactmusic.com) (22)

Mon February 22, 2010
(Canoe) Sad SNL writer and John Belushi's widow are on a mission from God to ruin The Blues Brothers again  (jam.canoe.ca) (85)
(Some Guy) Dumbass Virginia Republican says disabled children are God's punishment for women having abortions  (newsleader.com) (228)

Sun February 21, 2010
(Abc.net.au) Weird Chances are the hair weaves and extensions you've paid for at expensive salons came from temples in India where poor women sacrificed it to their gods to give thanks. Fashion industry claims it's a win/win  (abc.net.au) (63)

Sat February 20, 2010
(Some Guy) Scary Is this the worst Olympic Games ever? Death on the luge, no snow on the hills, security people shoplifting--what's next, leprosy? Oh. My. God  (timescolonist.com) (62)
(BBC) Interesting Monastery in Austria is offering men the chance to be a monk for a weekend. Have some time for contemplation, search for inner peace, find God, bone up on onanism  T-Shirt  (news.bbc.co.uk) (45)
(Huffington Post) Fail God thinks you're fat  (huffingtonpost.com) (67)

Fri February 19, 2010
(LA Times) Silly How did the Kardashian family become "an inescapable cultural and commercial force" so quickly and without one-tenth of the talent God gives the middle-school lead in a production of "The Music Man?"  (latimes.com) (58)

Thu February 18, 2010
(CBC) Sad Gordon Lightfoot joins Abe Vigoda in the Great Beyond  T-Shirt  (cbc.ca) (226)
(Yahoo) Stupid F*cking a**holes at NBC think that their f*cking viewers are such f*cking p***ies that they can't stand to hear a few goddamn f*cking curse words between Olympic snowboarder Shaun White and his coach celebrating his gold f*cking medal  (sports.yahoo.com) (227)
(CNN) Obvious Thank God  (cnn.com) (534)
(Huffington Post) Strange Toad in Suriname gives birth out of its back. Now with cuddly vide-ooooooooohhh my God  (huffingtonpost.com) (67)

Wed February 17, 2010
(Houston Chronicle) Fail Jerry Falwell's Liberty University continues to produce quality science: Did humans eat dinosaurs? How does God see under your sheets? Are gay people human?  (blogs.chron.com) (170)

Tue February 16, 2010
(Contact Music) Scary Because ruining Queen wasn't enough, Paul Rodgers reveals he was asked to front Aerosmith. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SOMEONE STOP HIM  (contactmusic.com) (36)
(YouTube) Spiffy From the "Goddammit I'd just managed to get that 80s song out of my head" department, it's Boys Don't Cry with I Wanna be a Cowboy  (youtube.com) (21)
(Giant Freakin' Robot) Spiffy Eleven science fiction properties that need a movie, from the predictable (Futurama) to the lame (Red Dwarf) to the awesome (The Mote in God's Eye)  (giantfreakinrobot.com) (347)

Mon February 15, 2010
(AL.com) Obvious Saban has more Facebook friends than God. In other news, The Almighty has a facebook page  (blog.al.com) (44)
(Break) Video Oh my God I'm so mad...oh my God  (break.com) (105)

Sun February 14, 2010
(Yahoo) Cool The sorta, kinda, maybe, semi-official, football is over, tired of snow everywhere except at the Olympics, thank god the season is finally here Daytona 500 discussion thread  (sports.yahoo.com) (1467)

Sat February 13, 2010
(Palm Beach Post) Florida Woman breaks into neighbor's house and claims to be a "Messenger of God". Judging by the gun in her hand, the message was Ezekiel 25:17  (palmbeachpost.com) (147)
(YouTube) Fail Tommy Wiseau, the auteur who gave us "The Room," unveils his next project. God help us, could it actually be worse?  (youtube.com) (32)

Fri February 12, 2010
(Rolling Stone) Cool The world's living guitar gods will unite at Eric Clapton's Crossroads festival later this year. For some inexplicable reason, they've invited John Mayer, though  (rollingstone.com) (71)

Thu February 11, 2010
(WLBZ2.com) Scary Turkey vulture crashes through the windshield of a chopper and lands in the pilot's lap, waits for the landing before taking off. As God is my witness, there's video  (wlbz2.com) (92)

Wed February 10, 2010
(The Consumerist) Amusing Customer breaks her tooth on a Godiva chocolate pretzel, demands reparations. Godiva sends her a complimentary box of chocolates. Hey, at least it was something  (consumerist.com) (38)
(Some Guy) Strange The movie Thor will be based on the comic book about the mythical Norse god who lorded over the land of ice and snow. So naturally Hollywood is going to film it in New Mexico  (connectamarillo.com) (63)

Tue February 09, 2010
(Talking Points Memo) Dumbass Michelle Bachmann brings the crazy again with her proclamation of God's curse upon the U.S. if it doesn't do Israel's bidding  (tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com) (237)

Mon February 08, 2010
(Wall Street Journal) Spiffy God of Nerds Alton Brown picks the five cookbooks you should have right this very instant  (online.wsj.com) (261)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida God's billboard wars are getting ugly  (tampabay.com) (481)

Sun February 07, 2010
(PCWorld) Cool Ohm my god, lithium-ion battery life could reach 20 years  (pcworld.com) (60)

Sat February 06, 2010
(USA Today) Interesting 55 million free condoms handed out for Carnival. This good news because god knows we don't need carnies reproducing with their small hands and smell of cabbage  (usatoday.com) (38)
(KnoxNews) Amusing This week's Hot for Teacher story brought to you by Tennessee, including "like the fist of an angry god, I would" pic  (knoxnews.com) (161)

Fri February 05, 2010
(Houston Chronicle) Sappy $144M Texas lottery winner to give 60% of winnings to charity: "The greatest gift my parents gave me was to be raised a Christian, and God told me I could get by on only $58M"  (chron.com) (199)
(Financial Times) Spiffy Goldman Sachs CEO gets only $9 million in restricted stock for doing "God's work." Congratulations, Angry Mob, you have deballed Wall Street  (ftalphaville.ft.com) (27)
(Telegraph) Interesting Ringo Starr says he found God. Steady beat still elusive  T-Shirt  (telegraph.co.uk) (53)
(Some Guy) Amusing Sorry Saints fans. A psychic nun has picked the Colts by 9...and God is on her side  (gambling911.com) (27)
(National Review) Interesting Avatar is Godless, left-wing, environazi tripe and it's only made a billion dollars because most people in our center-right nation are too stupid to realize that  (article.nationalreview.com) (165)
(American Decency Association) Strange "Do you think that the Holy God of Abraham, Moses, Joshua, Isaiah, Peter, John and Paul would find Super Bowl parties in place of worship services God-honoring?"  (americandecency.org) (65)
(Gawker) Spiffy You'd never have caught Walter Cronkite lounging in a speedo and a smile, and thank God for that: Katie Couric poses for some glamour shots  (gawker.com) (62)

Wed February 03, 2010
(Some Scary Midget) Followup Snooki, Jersey Shore's answer to Tila Tequila, denies there are nude photos and a sex tape of her out there. Thank f*cking god  (digitalspy.com) (94)

Tue February 02, 2010
(MSNBC) Asinine About seventy percent of people use the same password at their bank as they do everywhere else on the 'tubes. God, Sex, Money still top three most common passwords? You submitted this with a better Hackers reference  (redtape.msnbc.com) (266)

Mon February 01, 2010
(Some Online Dater) Interesting Statistical analysis of dating site's profile photos reveals that Myspace angles and sixpack abs get the most dates. Goddammit so much  (blog.okcupid.com) (119)
(Oregon Live) Cool God, I hate walking through this place at night  (oregonlive.com) (40)

Sun January 31, 2010
(Some Haim) Strange Corey Feldman reveals that the third Lost Boys film is "going to refer to Twilight." GODDAMMITSOMUCH...wait, there was a second Lost Boys film? That's even worse  (digitalspy.com) (56)
(Yahoo) Obvious What are the least God-fearing occupations in the county? That would be Hollywood filmmaker, scientist and journalist (except those on Fox News, of course)  (news.yahoo.com) (132)

Fri January 29, 2010
(Starpulse) Stupid Katy Perry's Twitter account gets hacked and series of juvenile messages get posted. No one really notices a difference  T-Shirt  (starpulse.com) (37)
(Ruthless) Amusing Sports stories of the decade, including "18-1," "The End of the Curse," "Roger Federer is a Boring God," and "Charlie Weiss: Charlatan, Con Artist, Fat"  (ruthlessreviews.com) (52)
(Some Guy) Strange "God Hates Lady Gaga" - the douchebags at the Westboro Baptist Church parody "Poker Face." Yes, you read that correctly  (muckmakers.com) (278)

Thu January 28, 2010
(YouTube) Sad We shall never forget them nor the last time we saw them, as they prepared for their mission and waved good-bye and slipped the surly bonds of Earth to touch the face of God  (youtube.com) (178)

Wed January 27, 2010
(The New York Times) Obvious Godless liberal academic finds that academics have a reputation for being godless liberals because godless liberals want to be academics because academics have a reputation for being godless liberals  (nytimes.com) (72)

Tue January 26, 2010
(The Inquisitr) Amusing God Hates Tweets: Westboro Baptist Church to picket Twitter  (inquisitr.com) (94)

Sat January 23, 2010
(Variety) Obvious The Goddamned Batman is no match for the Na'vi; Avatar has dethroned The Dark Knight as the number two highest grossing film of all time  (variety.com) (182)

Fri January 22, 2010
(YouTube) Amusing Peyton Manning yelling at Donald Brown midplay. "GODDAMMIT DONALD"  (youtube.com) (41)
(3 AM) Obvious This woman is 53. And sweet mother of God, you would  (3am.co.uk) (161)

Thu January 21, 2010
(ABC News) Followup Under pressure, Trijicon will remove the God code from its scopes. Military casualties expected to skyrocket  (abcnews.go.com) (513)
(Gamecock Central) Weird Want to know why Florida is getting such a good recruiting class? Urban Meyer is telling every recruit that he had a dream where he was coaching them and that it was a sign from God that he should come back and coach  (blog.gamecockcentral.com) (55)
(Yahoo) Asinine Actual headline: "SoCal braces for 4th day of rain, wind and weather." Weather? Dear God. How will they survive weather?  (news.yahoo.com) (194)

Wed January 20, 2010
(Yahoo) Stupid Enjoy your time on the beach and remember these few tips for your shore leave: the boat leaves at 7pm, Haitians speak French, and for God's sake don't wave food or water where they can see it....it will only make them angrier  (news.yahoo.com) (205)
(The Sun) Spiffy Don't you love it when a singer gets into a fight with a model over who has bigger breasts? "My t**s are better than hers anyway"  (thesun.co.uk) (65)

Tue January 19, 2010
(Gothamist) Asinine Pro tip: It's easier for catty fashionistas to criticize sexy goddess Christina Hendricks if the photo of her is distorted to overemphasize her lovely curves (pic)  (gothamist.com) (225)

Mon January 18, 2010
(Reuters) Sad As God is my witness, I thought Turkey could surf  (reuters.com) (48)

Sun January 17, 2010
(io9) Cool Joss Whedon on Dollhouse: "It's definitely over." Well, thank god; now, let's hope he stays off the airwaves  (io9.com) (185)

Sat January 16, 2010
(AskMen) Spiffy Kate Beckinsale on living up to being named Esquire Magazine's sexiest woman alive: "I need to go out and become much better at pole dancing or something." God bless you, Esquire Magazine  (askmen.com) (72)
(Starpulse) Sick Celebrities famous for no goddamned reason. The majority of them are already at 14:30, so let's help them into obscurity  (starpulse.com) (56)

Thu January 14, 2010
(The Atlantic) Fail In attacking President Obama in defense of conservatism and the religious right, Glenn Beck quoted Thomas Jefferson: "question with boldness". The full Jefferson quote? "Question with boldness even the existence of a God."  (andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com) (235)
(The Raw Story) Obvious Olbermann: "Mr. Robertson, Mr. Limbaugh, your lives are not worth those of the lowest, meanest, poorest of those victims still lying under that rubble in Haiti tonight. You serve no good, you serve no God." With video goodness  (rawstory.com) (389)
(Yahoo) Hero White House reacts to Pat Robertson's claim that God is punishing Haiti for making a pact with the Devil: "It never ceases to amaze me that in times of amazing human suffering somebody says something that can be so utterly stupid"  (news.yahoo.com) (703)
(CNN) Obvious Like godfather, like son  (us.cnn.com) (22)
(Wall Street Journal) Obvious Nikola Tesla is the new god of tech geeks. With picture of what a Tesla might look like if he was David Bowie  (online.wsj.com) (97)

Mon January 11, 2010
(Washington Post) Amusing With a full tank of gas and half a pack of cigarettes, Sarah Palin was on a mission from God; presumably to get the band back together  (washingtonpost.com) (174)

Sun January 10, 2010
(Fosters.com) Amusing Dear God, If you don't want to have the church painted, please give me a sign. Amen  (fosters.com) (42)

Sat January 09, 2010
(io9) Cool Chances are, the Oscars will be dominated by science fiction films. God help us, it's becoming mainstream  (io9.com) (50)

Fri January 08, 2010
(The Hill) Strange James Carville: airport scanners can "measure my penis," Oh Jesus, God no  (washingtonscene.thehill.com) (283)
(Breitbart.com) Obvious You can add "It's a Wonderful Life" to the growing list of films that conservatives have deemed Godless America-hating communist propaganda  (bighollywood.breitbart.com) (160)
(Time) Interesting "Everybody in the world knows Allah is the Muslim God and belongs to Muslims. I cannot understand why the Christians want to claim Allah as their god"  (time.com) (389)
(The New York Times) Scary "The ultimate battle, that will be a lot of fun to watch," one believer gushes."God is going to trash the planet," says another, beaming. Members of the Religion of Peace? Nope just your average American fundies  (movies.nytimes.com) (263)

Thu January 07, 2010
(News.com.au) Interesting Rodan's recovery may put him back on the soccer field soon. Godzilla said to be unhappy about this development  (news.com.au) (9)

Wed January 06, 2010
(C|Net) Cool Windows 7 allows you to wallhack, teabag and be indestructible with its Godmode  (news.cnet.com) (164)

Tue January 05, 2010
(The Hollywood Reporter) Stupid There is a God, and he hates us with the burning passion of anal herpes: Adam Carolla gets a sitcom pilot at NBC  (hollywoodreporter.com) (87)

Mon January 04, 2010
(Starpulse) Spiffy Kristen Bell says making her last movie with Christina Aguilera almost made her a lesbian. Oh God, somebody think of the kittens  (starpulse.com) (96)
(Daily Mail) Interesting People with names beginning with D live shorter lives, have life long poor self-esteem, and are born to poor parents. Drew Curtis says goddamnit so much  (dailymail.co.uk) (165)

Sun January 03, 2010
(YouTube) Cool SHMHC - Lamb of God, "Now You've Got Something To Die For" (screw cutesy headlines)  (youtube.com) (286)
(Contact Music) Asinine Miley Cyrus's brother Trace wants to be famous, so he's trying to get Disney to give him a TV show. Goddammit  (contactmusic.com) (68)

Sat January 02, 2010
(London Times) Silly London Times asks the important questions of our time: "Is John Mayer a rock god, or just a celebrity boyfriend?"  (entertainment.timesonline.co.uk) (37)

Thu December 31, 2009
(Radar Magazine) Fail Wikipedia was in a little bit too much of a hurry to kill Rush Limbaugh, Abe Vigoda  (radaronline.com) (191)

Sun December 27, 2009
(Huffington Post) Ironic Unlike Bush, who abrogated his responsibilities every time he felt like mowing the yard in Crawford, Obama is "actively monitoring" yesterday's terrorist attack. By phone. From Hawaii. Thank God he's on the ball  (huffingtonpost.com) (552)
(Entertainment Weekly) Asinine Guy Richie's Sherlock Holmes bastardization set a new record for biggest movie opening on Christmas. Goddammit, read a book, America  (hollywoodinsider.ew.com) (193)

Fri December 25, 2009
(Some Chick) Fail 58-year-old woman arrested for having sex with 14-year-old boy. W/pic of "dear god, what the hell was he thinking?"  (kesq.com) (166)
(Talking Points Memo) Dumbass Bunny takes down her Christmas tree and decoration because of the Senate health Care bill. Because of Hitler or Christmas is supposed to be God's holiday. Or something  (tpmlivewire.talkingpointsmemo.com) (307)

Thu December 24, 2009
(Contact Music) Amusing Dane Cook's Christmas tree was infested by poisonous spiders. Better luck next time, God  (contactmusic.com) (51)

Fri December 18, 2009
(Townhall) Asinine Mugabe: "When these capitalist gods of carbon burp and belch their dangerous emissions, it's we, the lesser mortals of the developing sphere, who gasp and sink and eventually die." Right. That is, unless Mugabe kills them first  (townhall.com) (261)

Thu December 17, 2009
(Variety) PSA Rene Russo will play Thor's mother Frigga in Kenneth Branagh's adaptation of Marvel's Norse Thunder God  (variety.com) (72)
(Huffington Post) Unlikely "Can science resurrect God?" But that trick NEVER works. Well, OK. Once  (huffingtonpost.com) (232)

Wed December 16, 2009
(News.com.au) Asinine It's a bad day when you fall and impale yourself on a fence. But you know god really hates you when it takes 45 minutes for the nearest ambulance to reach you and they aren't allowed to turn the lights and siren on  (news.com.au) (56)
(Contact Music) Obvious Charlize Theron has casting couch horror stories from when she first came to Hollywood at age 19. Oh, please, dear God, let there be pictures  (contactmusic.com) (104)

Tue December 15, 2009
(Toronto Star) Asinine Final Proof that God does not exist, or has a perverted sense of humour  (thestar.com) (80)
(AlterNet) Interesting Is belief in God hurting America?  (alternet.org) (692)
(Chicago Tribune) Interesting Illinois prison to take Gitmo detainees, making this the second time that an Illinois inmate is on a mission from God  (chicagotribune.com) (176)
(CNN) Interesting Sayonara and domo arigato for the 2009 World Series, Godzilla. Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim sign Hideki Matsui for one year/$6M  (sportsillustrated.cnn.com) (78)
(Quad City Times) Weird As God is my witness, I thought Pomeranians could fly  (qctimes.com) (111)

Mon December 14, 2009
(Telegraph) Interesting Let's see now, √((r²-l²)+(l+k)² - (√(r²-l²)-w)²)-l-... GOD DAMMIT, Get out of my parking spot  (telegraph.co.uk) (160)

Sun December 13, 2009
(YouTube) Amusing Poker Face performed, as God intended, by an all-male A Cappella group  (youtube.com) (33)

Sat December 12, 2009
(AP) Interesting Instead of taking everybody's guns, gun laws have actually loosened during the Obama administration. "This is all a coordinated approach to respect that human, God-given right of self defense by law-abiding Americans"  (hosted.ap.org) (248)
(Wall Street Journal) Obvious To every con artist, Inmate No. 61727-054 is the godfather, the don  (online.wsj.com) (28)

Fri December 11, 2009
(Bloomberg) Cool Bank of America could find out what it's like to have an honest-to-god competent banker as CEO  (bloomberg.com) (27)
(NYmag) Amusing David Cross, F---ed Up, Andrew W.K., Yo La Tengo, GZA and Bob Mould cover "Do They Know It's Christmas" without changing any of the words: "God no. The lyrics are tasteless enough as it is" (with audio)  (nymag.com) (33)

Thu December 10, 2009
(io9) Interesting On his blog, Thomas Dolby blinds Star Wars fans with a new hope upon mentioning how his friend is working on the new Star Wars TV show, movie, and online games. Yes, you saw that. "Movie." Goddammitsomuch, George Lucas  (io9.com) (107)
(SF Signal) Spiffy The ever-irascible Harlan Ellison on God: "The universe doesn't know we're here. It just doesn't know" (video)  (sfsignal.com) (385)
(Some Guy) Strange As God as my witness - I thought turkeys could drive  (newschannel5.com) (28)

Wed December 09, 2009
(Yahoo) Obvious Glenn Beck's surivivalist rants urging his listeners to stock up on "Guns, God, and Gold", may have something to do with the fact that he is an undisclosed paid spokesman for a major gold-trading firm  (news.yahoo.com) (421)
(Sky.com) Amusing Media admits they're very, very thankful for their early present this holiday season: "God bless Tiger"  (blogs.news.sky.com) (29)

Tue December 08, 2009
(PhysOrg.com) Unlikely Testosterone doesn't cause aggression, and if you don't stop saying it does, I'll rip your goddamned smarmy head off and shiat down your neck  (physorg.com) (39)
(io9) Unlikely Does Iron Man 2 = Spider-Man 3? Oh, please God no  (io9.com) (105)

Mon December 07, 2009
(BBC) Scary Irrefutable that God hates sports: Food and drink served to athletes at 2012 Olympics will be 20% McDonald's and Coca-Cola, with the rest being British "wherever possible"  (news.bbc.co.uk) (26)
(Showbiz Spy) Cool Eva Green wishes her lesbian sex scene in Cracks would have been dirtier. "The love scene is soft-I wanted to go even further." Dear God, won't someone please think of the kittens?  (showbizspy.com) (101)

Sat December 05, 2009
(Pharyngula) Fail Maths has found God, convinced skeptics: "I am a scientist and as such I didn't at first really believe it myself. But physics is physics, and maths is maths, and you can't argue with it"  (scienceblogs.com) (245)
(The Sun) Asinine Trio of singing soldiers who raise money for injured comrades told they can't wear their uniforms when they sing God Save The Queen in front of the Queen because it's considered moonlighting  (thesun.co.uk) (20)

Fri December 04, 2009
(NJ.com) Asinine Five children go 11 days without food while mother makes no effort to look for job: "We were supposed to wait for God to provide and that's what we did"  (nj.com) (202)
(Michelle Malkin) Scary The man Obama is entrusting with our childrens' education wants to force them to read books about boys fondling each other's genitals and watch plays about a Godless homosexual "Satan" Claus  (michellemalkin.com) (259)

Tue December 01, 2009
(C|Net) Dumbass Former SETI@home "God" revealed as high school technology department head who installed program on every computer in the district, loses job. The search for intelligent life continues  (news.cnet.com) (159)

Mon November 30, 2009
(NJ.com) Silly Church finds success using football to bring people to God, because football is real and can change people's lives  (nj.com) (106)

Sun November 29, 2009
(Starpulse) Scary "Twilight" to be adapted for television. GOOD GOD, IT'S EVERYWHERE  (starpulse.com) (84)
(The New York Times) Obvious Bootstrappy red states mooch off Uncle Sam when it comes to food stamps, too...and shamlessly inflict millions of new god-bothering palinbots on the rest of us  (nytimes.com) (345)
(YouTube) Hero The Sunday Heavy Metal House Call (early AM edition for those still awake) wishes to show its support for its god. Black Sabbath - Neon Knights. Slay the dragon, Dio  (youtube.com) (120)

Thu November 26, 2009
(Mr. Carlson) Amusing As God is my witness, here's the WKRP "Turkeys Away" episode  (vodpod.com) (24)
(Tameside Advertiser) Obvious Religious education teacher jailed for teaching teenage boy to scream "Oh God!"  (tamesideadvertiser.co.uk) (48)
(Entertainment Weekly) Followup Not so fast, Stephen King fans; that announcement about a Shining sequel was a bit premature. Thank god  (shelf-life.ew.com) (42)

Wed November 25, 2009
(Charlotte Obs) Unlikely Billy Graham thinks God was using Sarah Palin "to wake America up," presumably to witness John McCain's godawful decision making skills  (charlotteobserver.com) (92)

Tue November 24, 2009
(Ars Technica) Cool "Godfather of Spam" sentenced to 51 months of meat in his can  T-Shirt  (arstechnica.com) (70)

Mon November 23, 2009
(AJC) Amusing County jail inmates denied hot meals for past five weeks because of broken kettles for boiling and heating. As God is my witness, I thought turnkeys could fry  T-Shirt  (ajc.com) (68)

Sun November 22, 2009
(Daily Kos) Unlikely God is punishing Notre Dame football because Obama spoke at the college. Why God is punishing the rest of us with Notre Dame football, we may never know  (dailykos.com) (112)

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